Don't Leave Me
by AndyH
Summary: Gaz is a solo-gamer who needs a team partner to compete in a national video game competition, but doesn't think much of the humans around her. Neither does Zim, a solo-invader. And how will they manage all that happens after? An eventual ZAGR piece, but it won't happen the way you think it will. It wouldn't be IZ unless something went haywire. Will build up slowly. A 1st Fanfic.
1. Chapter 1: Prologue

Author's Note: I'm just playing in someone else's sandbox. I own nothing. I have no money. I am not responsible. Story picture is Gaz: Nightmare by Grim_Raider. Thanks for posting it on DeviantART. If you can't spot the IZ episode references, watch the DVD's again. Whatever OOC exists is due to both the time frame in which the characters have grown as well as my lack of imagination. After all, there is only one Johnen Vasquez.

* * *

It all started innocently enough. Well, not the actions themselves since bringing doom on to someone's existence can't be called innocent no matter how deserving. But the exchanges were. A sort of a tip of the hat, if you will, out of respect for an impressive job well done. It began with an occasional and quiet chuckle, or an inner smirk. Rare, and barely noticeable unless one knew what to look for.

The first active gesture of this respect was when Gazlene Membrane opened her locker and found a small photo of Timmy entombed in the school's cafeteria gelatin.

During class, poor Timmy had sent a paper airplane flying at another student with a bent paperclip stuck in the nose, but a gust of air from the poorly maintained air duct blew it off course and impacted Gaz's thumb. The distraction caused the character on her GameSlave 2 to miss a vampire piggy, requiring a second swing of its sword. This was bad enough to earn a glare of doom, but the prongs of the bent paperclip had drawn a speck of blood.

Most of the gelatin had already been served to the students by the time the picture had been recorded as it had taken fifteen minutes before anyone had noticed the victim struggling to free himself. It was cafeteria food after all. Gaz reflected the barest hint of a smirk as she turned the photo over. On the back was a brief notation. _Serving him up as lunch? Not bad, for a human. - Zim._

* * *

A week after the school reopened from the water damage, Zim opened his own locker and found a red piece of torn elastic material inside. He picked it up, angered at the intrusion. Reading the inscription he subsided into a chuckle. "Yeah, that was a good win for ZIM," the alien loudly said to himself remembering how he had doomed Dib via an orbital strike with the giant water balloon. Half the city had been flooded by the resulting tsunami.

_That complete overkill was not bad, for an invader. -Gaz._

* * *

These small gestures didn't happen very often. Just on occasions when a bit of extra creativity or even (although neither could admit it) a touch of brilliance appeared. Sometimes a snapshot from a cloaked outdoor surveillance drone, or hacked from the school's security feed, or a photo from a discreet cell phone. Other times a piece of debris with a short note written on it. Eventually minor suggestions for deserved wrath appeared in small notes. All these were always left stuck in an unattended locker as neither wanted to be bothered by having to socially interact with anyone, including each other. After all, she was a stink-human and he was an idiot-invader. But underneath it all and viciously denied was a respect for a fellow doomer.

Once when it was customary among humans to give token gifts that they would later exchange for items they actually wanted, Gaz found a small item seemingly abandoned in her locker. A tool of the trade if you will, made from human tech. After all, Zim was incapable of even considering his Irken military technology being given as a possession to anyone, let alone a human. This was simply a remote disguised as a small wristwatch.

When Gaz touched one of the buttons, dark clouds formed outside and a stroke of lightning flashed. Far off she heard a yelp of pain from Zim as rain began to fall. "This is linked to Zim's Weather Control Generator?" she asked herself, smiling at thoughts of how useful it would be in her psychological campaign of intimidation against those who annoyed her.

The generator Zim built was, as usual, ill-conceived. The device was totally underpowered and only produced small showers and lightning. The only one who could be harmed by it ironically was Zim since water burned his skin. She quickly shut it off, not thinking of how she had accidentally caused her gift-giver pain. Gaz had given him a lot of slack for plenty of things because Dib usually earned greater wrath before she could give it proper thought. And, if she could admit it, because Zim was so pathetically out of his element. The only reason he had managed to survive even one night on Earth was because everyone else was even more pathetic as well as a complete moron whereas Zim was just an idiot.

* * *

Next was a tiny holographic projector she could fit into the back of her boot's heel. It could project any environmental background she wished (such as a burning inferno) for a few seconds. That inspired her to install one of her dad's repulser field units into the heel as well. "Oh this is just too good," Gaz chuckled to herself with an evil smile.

Soon afterward Gaz solidified her school reputation as being part spawn from a hellion after she terrorized Iggens into returning her rightful GameSlave 2. The next day was an anticipated snapshot in her locker. _Gaz-beast- The levitation outside his window was a nice touch. Can't stop laughing. -Zim._

The years passed in this manner.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Got the "Don't leave me" quote/dream reference from another IZ fanfic, but can't find it or remember the author's name. You know who you are, so let me know, and thanks for the inspiration. I plan on coming back to it in later chapters.

* * *

Zim sat in his living room in front of the large TV screen, watching the video feed from the spybot he had planted on Dib's jacket collar during lunch. They we're seniors in hi-skool now, and Gaz was a year behind as a junior. The two siblings had grown as human teenagers will do so, but most everything else had stayed the same. Gaz's hair was still styled as a set of mandibles, but she had grown it out so that the lower jaw looked detachable like a snake's, swallowing its prey. Zim had grown as well, but still an inch or two shorter than the Membrane children. Something to do with the growth hormones in the cafeteria mystery meat that Gaz plastered Zim with on occasion as punishment for dragging her into one of his disputes with Dib during school hours, and thus interrupting valuable game time.

Ironically this was Zim's one real success in the eyes of his Tallest, Red and Purple. They demanded that Zim secure a suitable supply of the chemicals and have it delivered to them. After attempting to hijack a delivery truck, then stealing from the factory only to be thwarted by Dib (and of course Gir's helpfulness) Zim finally just bought the stuff on e-bay and shipped it via courier drone. Delighted, the now eight foot tall Irken leaders rewarded Zim with a stripped-down armored combat chassis from the Irken junk yard and orders to never deliberately use the growth chemicals on himself or to militarize such a commodity "vital to the government personnel of Irk."

"This is SO boring," Zim remarked.

It was now late Sunday night, and on his own screen Dib and Gaz were sitting on their couch at the Membrane home watching a rerun of the canceled TV show Mysterious Mysteries. Well Dib was. Gaz was playing her ever present GameSlave 3.

Oh the Tallest! He, the mighty Zim, was literally looking at a TV watching them watch TV! He couldn't think nor admit the feeling even to himself, but Zim felt so tired by his mission sometimes. It was all he really had. Seemed his whole life was defined by it. Alone on a planet full of stink-humans he couldn't stand. Only one person in the whole universe had _earned _a smallest shred of respect from him, and that person wasn't even a member of his own species!

* * *

Gaz was blazing away on her GameSlave. She had long ago graduated from Vampire Piggy Slayer to Combat WarZone, a first-person shooter. Dib was watching his rerun on the TV and running a commentary as if he hadn't seen it like a hundred times before. It was really annoying so she tuned it out as usual, plus she leaned back on the arm of the couch and put her feet up so she could accidentally kick her bothersome brother seated next to her. And just as usual, it was only the two of them since their father Professor Membrane was always working on the next miracle/disaster at the Membrane Labs. They had no mother, and now their father was almost just as non-existent.

Gaz yawned. It was getting late and they had school tomorrow, but she was determined to complete the level's mission objectives before turning in. Gaz couldn't think the thoughts, but it wasn't much of a life, her games. But they wouldn't leave her, nor abandon her unlike her own family. Mom was gone a long time ago, Dad was going, even Dib would do so temporarily since he had inherited that same obsessive trait and pursued his stupid paranormal investigations and in trying to stop Zim's mission. Gaz actively kept everyone out since Mom left. So what if she didn't have friends? That just meant she wouldn't be hurt when those theoretical friends left her. But she couldn't admit these things even to herself.

Her games were all she really had. Alone on a planet full of moronic humans she couldn't stand. Only one person had _earned_ a smallest shred of respect from her, and that person wasn't event a member of her own species!

* * *

The episode of Mysterious Mysteries about zombie lunchmeat ended and Dib stopped his commentary about how ridiculous that it was still unproven when they had to hunt it down for lunch in the hi-skool cafeteria every Tuesday. He looked over and found his sister asleep next to him on the couch, GameSlave still active. Dib sighed as he reached over, took the machine from her limp hand and powered it down. Gaz may not like him touching the device, but she'd rather have that than dead batteries in the morning.

Dib took off his jacket and draped it over his sleeping sister. She appeared to be in deep sleep, so he didn't want to wake her. _I do my best to take care of her,_ Dib sighed, _but I'm just her geeky brother and still growing up myself. She's always needed more than I can handle, even if she viciously tries every moment to prove otherwise. And then there's constantly having to stop Zim from setting us up for an alien invasion._ And with that he quietly went off to bed.

* * *

It was obvious that there were no security threats from Dib tonight so Zim had gone down into the labs beneath his base. His robot Gir was sitting on the floor spitting soap bubbles while Zim sat at his computer console in front of several monitors to double check this conclusion before moving on to other things. The screen from the latest spybot within the Membrane house was dark, so Zim ordered it to switch to night vision mode. What he saw made him nervous.

The spybot had been planted on Dib's collar next to the shoulder, so the video was now showing a sleeping Gaz's face at a range of almost two inches. It was not the face of a peaceful sleep and the view was mostly of her nostrils. An unpleasant picture to say the least, but that wasn't what made Zim nervous. There were certain unspoken rules that had been established over the years in the feud between Zim and Dib regarding his mission. Violations got Gaz involved. She _really_ hated to be involved and would make Zim hate it too.

Zim personally was not permitted to physically destroy the Earth. Not only was she present, but Gaz's games were made there. Conquer the planet? Yes. Ruin its civilization? It's asking for it. Destroy the planet? No.

Zim was not permitted to personally kill Dib. Place in extreme hazard? That came with the job. Replace his brain with an obedience squid? Why not? She might even help with that one. Doom when he deserved it or breathed wrong? By all means. But he was her brother, the only family she really had left and she would not lose it in a stupid feud.

Dib was not allowed to capture and/or dissect Zim. He may be an alien on a mission to conquer the Earth for an empire possessing a grand total of five functioning brain cells, but doing that to someone you went to skool with was just creepy in Gaz's book. Besides, Zim's plans usually self-destructed anyway.

There were a few others Dib had to follow which were irrelevant to Zim. But the most important of all was _never _spy on Gazlene Membrane. Her person, room, locker, possessions, ect. were all off limits. She knew about the intelligence gathering drones, spybots and what not. But those were either for general use around the city and skool, or specifically targeted on Dib. And to be honest she liked the snapshots of her best doomings (not that Zim knew this) and of course the ones showing Dib floundering in one of his schemes. But the specific targeting of Gaz with recon units would be considered stalking and that would lead to an unimaginable process of dying in unspeakable torment. Actual dying would not be allowed.

So understandably Zim was apprehensive about this circumstance. He began typing at his controls, carefully guiding the small recon unit off her person and to the nearest disposal unit before she woke up. The spybot sprouted small spider-like legs and moved off the couch and across the room.

"Don't go."

Zim/spybot froze in momentary horror, imagining the unimaginable. Then reason returned, and Zim spun the bot around to face Gaz. On the screen before him, she was lightly squirming and tossing her arms as she slept. _Dreaming_ Zim told himself.

"Mastaaa? What's wrong with Scary Lady?" Gir asked. "Is she scaring herself?"

"Don't leave me," Gaz mumbled from the monitor.

"I think in her dream she believes she's vulnerable." Zim had never seen this before. Not from the powerful Gaz-zilla. It was unnerving in its own way. He was definitely not supposed to be seeing this. Thoughts crept back to unimaginable things he'd have to endure for all eternity if she ever found out he saw any weak side of her.

"You should do something about it," Gir stated. "Will tuna fix her?"

"No Gir, Gaz-zilla is asleep, and at her own house."

"How about dolphin?"

Zim just really didn't want to know.

"I'll get more soap. WEEEEEEE!" The insane robot's legs unfolded to expose the jet turbines and he shot out of the room and up the elevator shaft. A crash sounded a moment later as Gir impacted the floor of the room overhead. "Maybe I'll go for Taco's instead," Zim heard in the distance, and he shook his head.

The alien Invader had learned much in the years spent on this miserable planet, too much he sometimes thought and little of it he really understood.

"Crazy minion," he muttered. "But you're right." Zim turned back to the controls.

* * *

In the Membrane's living room, the spybot became active once more. It was only an inch across, and spider like. It's legs telescoped until it now stood a foot high, and a dish spun outward from the main body and unfolded into a small platform. The covert bot's secondary function was used to bring back interesting samples for study such as alien technology, enemy supplies, or tranquilized lifeforms.

It approached the sleeping form quietly. Gaz was not a tall person, and petite in build. Her purple hair was now tangled in her right fingers and eyelids mashed together. Metallic arms raised and each activated a tiny tractor/repulser field. Another was formed underneath the bot to stabilize the weight. Gaz's fitful form slid off the couch and over the small machine, her center of gravity coming to a slight rest on the platform. Her body relaxed as the pressure generated by the repulsers hugged around her. Then the bot slid up the stairs and into her room, carefully placing Gaz onto her bed.

Backing away a voice quietly issued forth. "Security: cuddle mode."

The security bots Gaz had made out of stuffed animals and other toys after her mother was gone slithered off of their shelves and curled around the now peacefully sleeping human, Dib's jacket still covering her. That Gaz had designed the bots to be flesh eating was irrelevant at the moment. Zim hoped that it would remain that way if Gaz-zilla ever found out about this. Cuddle mode was also the only command that didn't require her voice-print ID. The alien had heard it only once in all the years he had been trying to get intel on Dib's efforts to counter Zim's mission.

The Irken spybot floated to a waste basket near the desk and paused. A drawer was partially open. Ordinarily Zim wouldn't risk having his fingers torn off and shoved down his throat so he could tickle his own belly from the inside (or so Gaz had warned Dib which had earned a laugh from Zim over a previous infiltration sortie). But something on the video monitor seemed familiar yet out of place in his own mind. An arm lifted, poked at the opening for a split second, then the bot floated into the nearby waste basket and quietly self-destructed with the smallest poof.

* * *

Back at the base Zim was now confused by what was displayed on his screen. The video was a still picture from inside the drawer and he now saw why it was familiar. Inside was keep-sakes and mementos. And up front was every snapshot and note he had ever slid into her locker at skool. Each related to some doom she had brought to those who earned her wrath. Each photo showing her strongest, most powerful side.

Zim had learned much from his stay among the stink-humans. Little of it he understood himself. But he understood one thing about Gaz this night. Those who have impervious defenses on the outside have a fragile center that must be protected no matter what the cost. He himself was a strong being, a mighty Invader, assigned by the tallest themselves. No other invader in the Irken military could have kept going with their mission after so many years of devoted service with so few results. But if what he saw tonight in Gaz said something about her, what did it say about him? Zim didn't know.

He left the computer to attend other projects. That armored combat chassis he was restoring was sitting in the fabrication bay and would be finished soon, the experimental hypnotic chickens needed tending (for some reason he couldn't stop feeding them), and then there was that other thing he was creating for Gaz-zilla tomorrow. He knew she would like it. What he didn't know was that way deep down he hoped it would help ease whatever tormented that center of her soul.


	3. Chapter 3

Dib awoke early the next morning just like he did every morning. He had many things to do before school began. Make his bed, brush his teeth, check the hot water to make sure Gaz didn't switch it with the sewer line _again_ before taking a shower, check the security updates of the night before since Zim didn't need to sleep as often as humans did. Busy busy busy.

He crawled out of bed and stumbled toward the bathroom. "Computer begin morning review."

Dib brushed his teeth as he eyed the water lines for tampering. So far nothing. The shower was uneventful. As he stepped back into his room his eyes widened at the computer screen. _Irken class one power signature detected: 11:47pm. Membrane Residence_ it blinked. He dove for his chair and began typing commands.

Well, to be honest first he checked to make sure he still had all his organs. After that first time he couldn't be too careful. Thankfully Gaz "suggested" that Zim return the stolen organs to their owners. No one had questioned why Zim had "borrowed" _only_ a useless appendix from her and replaced it with her GameSlave. Or why Gaz didn't seem to mind. Probably thought the whole incident was entertaining to watch since she didn't like people all that much.

Various video shots popped up on his screen, along with power signature analysis graphics. Nothing was showing up yet. Motion sensor readings tripped however and Dib highlighted a camera to zoom in. He saw the view center on his sister and zoom in on the spybot located on his jacket collar. As Dib watched the scene unfold his mouth dropped open. He knew what Zim first intended as the tiny bot maneuvered to the kitchen disposal. Gaz's rules/consequences were in no way vague and Zim was not the type to sign up for his own suicide mission. But after Gaz began to mumble in her sleep things got weird.

Dib's security didn't cover Gaz's room for obvious reasons. The one of the biggest involved him being served to her flesh-eating security dolls. But he hurried out of his room to check on her because Dib worried about his younger sister, especially when Zim was involved. He found her door still open and peeked in.

Gaz was still peacefully sleeping surrounded by her guarding dolls, tucked under his jacket as she lay curled up. Never before had she looked as calm as she did now especially after one of her nightmares, which was what she must have been having on the recording. Dib didn't know what to do, his instincts being pulled in too many directions at once. Over-protective, yet grateful at the same time. So he decided to let the matter drop for now and let Zim have a standard warning later at skool.

* * *

Gaz woke up thirty minutes later. She dimly remembered one of her nightmares starting last night but was replaced with a sense of...close security. Like what haunted in her nightmares was chased away by some guardian you could wrap yourself up in like a blanket. None of this penetrated her fore-brain of course. She found herself wrapped up in her brother's jacket and surrounded by her modified stuffed animals and thought nothing more of it as she prepared for another pointless day at skool. But even Gaz had to admit to herself that she was feeling unusually rested and in good spirits this morning.

* * *

She was reading a flyer/rule guide for an up coming Combat WarZone national championship while she walked to her locker. This was something she really wanted to go to, but it was a team event and she was a solo player. That really sucked because she was pretty good, but she really didn't want to need anyone but herself. Inwardly Gaz sighed as she told herself this and opened up her locker. As she collected her books her eyes automatically flicked down to a place at the bottom of the locker. Most days there was nothing there, but everyday her eyes checked anyhow. Today was different. A note with a yellow package shaped like a pair of batteries taped to it and her normally squinted eyes opened.

_Gaz-zilla- Your GameSlave could use this power cell. Recharge in 200 years. -Zim. P.S. Don't break open or radiation leak may occur. Unless you wish to doom mankind then go ahead._

She let a brief laugh escape. The ending was classic Zim. Gaz didn't much like being referred to a movie monster, but understood. For an Irken one's name often was associated with their position or status. But of course Zim usually got it backwards in addressing humans, and their status was usually only a reflection of how high up the ladder they were in his mind. But Gaz couldn't complain when her "status" was the highest he called just about anyone. An agent of doom.

She replaced the batteries in her GameSlave with the power cell which fit perfectly. Gaz couldn't help but smile this time. Something that matched her primary interest this well deserved more than an acknowledgment note at the bottom of a locker, and an idea began to form in her mind. Gaz put the GameSlave back in her pocket, hefted her books, and went to find Zim. She knew she wouldn't have to wait very long to pin down a location. Sure enough two hallways down came the shout "VICTORY FOR ZIM!"

Gaz shook her head as she headed in that direction. For someone almost phobic about maintaining a low profile and fitting in to avoid detection, Zim practically did everything possible to stand out like a flashing neon sign with air horns.

* * *

Dib had intercepted the poorly disguised green alien on their way to their first period class. The hallways were crowded as usual, so they stood off to the side to avoid the trampling. "Zim," he scowled.

"Dib-stink. So we meet again," Zim responded dramatically, "just like every skool day."

"I saw what you did last night, Zim."

"How did you find out about the hypno-chickens?" Zim practically howled.

"Chickens? What chickens?"

"I didn't say chickens."

"Yes you- grrrrr," Dim face palmed. "I meant your little spybot."

"Yes. Got one past you again? WIN!"

Dib growled. "No! I meant about Gaz."

The alien's posture shifted. "Ah yes...Difficult position to find one's spybot in. Rule number one."

"Is that all you can say for yourself?" Dib accused.

Zim eyed his adversary with a tilted head. "Why? What should I have done, Dib-stink?"

"Well you should have...well...um." Zim had him there. Dib couldn't honestly find any real fault with the disguised alien. How did you find fault with someone who showed an act of sympathy toward your little sister during a nightmare when really it was Dib who put Zim in that position in the first place? It wasn't like he wanted to be there. Gaz would have shown no mercy.

Dib stumbled to keep his conversation going. "W-Why did you do that anyway?"

Zim looked _really _uncomfortable now. "A...fortress with such impervious defenses has a fragile weak point inside that it defends at all cost to prevent collapse. It can't afford not to. To see this is...Zim does not understand what he saw, but knows what it is."

Dib just stared at him. The Zim he knew and grew up in opposition against was never this, well, deep or insightful. "And naturally you are going to use this in some scheme to conquer my planet?" he sneered.

Zim looked at his feet. This was probably the first time Dib had ever seen Zim act this way. He didn't know what to make of it.

"No," Zim said mildly. "You don't do that too someone... who is not a stranger. Even Zim knows that would be _vile_."

Dib was almost in shock by this point. This was not the Zim he knew. "Well, um," he stammered. They both needed this conversation to stop. "Just STAY AWAY FROM MY SISTER!" he nearly shouted as he walked away. Other students looked at them for a moment as they walked past the hallway weirdo-drama.

Zim raised both three fingered fists in the air. "VICTORY FOR ZIM!" he shouted out.

He turned back to his locker to remove the hopelessly outdated textbooks he needed for his upcoming classes. One seemed to be printed on parchment. This took a minute as all his books were jammed together in a compact pile.

"Hey Zim," a familiar female voice sounded nearby.

Zim nearly jumped inside his skin. _Dib sold me out didn't he? Now Gaz-zilla wants revenge._ "H-Hi."

Gaz was too busy playing her game to notice anything amiss. "I just wanted to thank you for the power cell. It's great. Don't think anyone's given me something I'd actually appreciate for a long time. Means a lot."

Zim waved the complement off as no big deal. "It was simple. Had an extra set from my spare black hole projector." Gaz paused the game and looked over her GameSlave at the alien who merely shrugged. "It was a two-for-one deal a few years ago. I know how many batteries you go through during the skool year, and how ugly things get when they go dead mid-game."

"Whatever." Gaz took a quick but deep breath. "Anyway I was wondering something. There is a CWZ competition in two weeks, but it's for teams only."

Zim discreetly examined Gaz. He found no tell-tales of a trap or other signs of impending doom. "I see. And what is this CWZ and how does this involve me?"

"Well," she started to explain and showing him the game at the same time. "Its called Combat WarZone. Helps with my wrath management. Sort of a futuristic land/air battle simulation in single and multi-player modes. Well, futuristic for us that is. Probably obsolete by your standards. They are having a national team championship and I can't compete by myself. Could use a partner." She decided to sweeten the deal. "Mostly young adults, but a lot of professional soldiers compete too." Zim's eyes and ego perked up at this naturally, just like Gaz knew they would. The next point would close the deal for sure. "Plus it will upset Dib."

"This intrigues me," Zim was scratching his chin rationalizing his decision. "Infiltrating this 'competition' will help me learn the weaknesses of this planet's defenders. And sticking it to Dib is by itself is a worthwhile goal for Zim. Where will this take place?"

"That's part of my problem too. Its in Vegas. Dad won't let me go since it's so far away and for the whole weekend. Assuming he's paying attention. And Dib, well you know Dib. Over protective."

Zim laughed. "He cares for you in his own way, even though its unnecessary. But I have an easy solution. It would take only a mere suborbital hop in the Voot cruiser to commute each day. No need to stay overnight."

"So we have a deal. Partners?" Gaz asked. Negotiations and rationalizations were completed.

"Agreed."

"Great. When do we meet to practice?"

"Practice? Why? Zim is the mighty ZIM!"

Gaz mentally face palmed. "Look, you may be an invader, but you have no experience with the game format or the control interface. Plus we have to learn to work together. Or do you want to sign up only to fall flat on our faces? And by ours I mean mine."

Zim actually looked sheepish at this muted outburst. They were still in the crowded hi-skool's halls. He knew he should have already thought of what she stated. "Tell Zim what equipment is needed for this and Zim will text Gir to pick them up. We shall practice at my base after skool."

Gaz began to write a short list on a scrap of note paper. "Gir?"

"Why not? He buys random dookie all the time."

She began to shake her head. A crazy toddler-sized robot pretending to be a green dog with a giant zipper running down the front making purchases at the mall on its own. The two of them should have been caught years ago, but somehow nobody ever noticed anything in this city. She sometimes wondered why she didn't tie Dib up in the basement and let mankind get conquered. They were _so_ asking for it.

"Okay, here's the list. Guess I'll see you later. Bye."

With that the two departed to their classes. Some students actually saw a strange sparkle in the two separate pairs of eyes that day. It was a lot more than Gaz or Zim noticed.


	4. Chapter 4

Zim sat in his American History class. All the students were treating it as study hall of course as the purpose of American History was to be ignored until it bit you in the rear. It wasn't supposed to be learned, as demonstrated by the teacher up front sleeping off a hangover. In the room next door he could hear Ms. Bitters (as someone transferred her into hi-skool to fill a sudden job vacancy and no one was asking any questions) teaching her students how X was doomed to be subtracted by Y and then both fated to be divided by Z.

It happened to be one of Gaz's favorite classes, and not because algebra was her favorite subject.

Being reminded of Gaz, Zim turned his attention to the partnership he had just entered into. Zim had never been good at the partners thing and as far as he knew neither had Gaz. Or wanted to be for that matter. But Zim decided he'd better get a head start on this new project. He may not care about the humans around him, they were dirt-beings after all and blissfully stupid, but Gaz was different than any creature he had ever met. If he didn't do his best to make this work, she would doom him real good for the rest of his life. And Gaz would make sure that life was a long one indeed.

Zim reached behind him and pulled a Pad from his PAK. It was really a mini-computer far more sophisticated than anything Earth had ever produced, with a wireless interface direct to the base's computer core. With that he could research this competition more fully. Assuming he could get the computer to stop hogging the bandwidth as it surfed the internet for celebrity gossip.

The alien accessed the remote link and began searches of the game, various versions that ran on differing platforms, competition history, past facilities it was held, equipment rentals, press photos, articles, profiles of previous place holders, and anything else he could think of. As he continued his research, it seemed to be more than a simple competition between people with their GameSlaves as Gaz had suggested. More like an event with over four thousand in attendance. It was almost like a human version of the great assigning back on Irk so many years ago.

A typical team was about five players. The first rounds were between groups assigned randomly using hand held GameSlaves which then posted results to the event database. Then it was on desktop computers networked into an on-site server. The top ten teams then graduated to a virtual cockpit setup for the finals.

Zim began scripting instructions, blueprints and modifications to the base computer as well as the now expanded list that Gaz had given him for Gir to pick up including four items to deliver at lunch. For a hostile invader from another planet bent on conquering the Earth, he had a surprisingly high credit limit. Apparently his computer also liked to dabble in the stock market as a hobby.

If you could name one positive quality Zim had, it was that he threw all he had into a project. It may be ill-conceived, lacking foresight, or just ludicrous, but you couldn't say he ever held back in effort or spirit. Especially spirit.

* * *

Dib sat by himself in the cafeteria in his usual place. Next to him was Gaz's, indicated by the carved skull in the empty chair surrounded by the words "PROPERTY OF GAZ." It was empty at the moment. Before him was a tray of either week old gravy or pizza. It was difficult to know which was which. At least his lunch wasn't moving. He heard the heavy clump of steel-toed boots as Gaz came up to join him like she did every day since elementary school.

"So what did you bring for lunch?" Dib asked.

"Beef Stick and crackers. Better safe than sorry," she responded, pointing at the glop before her brother. Sitting down she brought out a small guillotine.

"What's that for?" he asked, wondering if he wanted to know.

"For the Beef Stick, duh," Gaz retorted. She began slicing circles of meat to put on her crackers.

"Where did you get it?"

"Made it last period in metal shop," came the reply.

Gaz was never one for unnecessary conversation. Or people for that matter. Dib returned to contemplating the risk of ingesting his lunch. For some reason he could never remember to bring actual food from home. He decided against his better judgment that he would, figuring his immune system could handle it.

"I'm taking Zim to the CWZ convention in Vegas next weekend."

Naturally Gaz had waited for a good moment, and Dib spewed lunch glop all over the table. "Whaaaa?"

"I'm taking..."

"I heard what you said, I just can't believe you would joke like that while I'm trying to eat this."

Gaz's eyes narrowed even further, if that was even possible. "I asked him this morning and he's agreed. We're going to his base after school to practice."

Dib stammered "But you can't! Gaz, he's an evil alien! You know, planetary conquest, enslave the human race, and everything? He'll probably try to put a mind control probe in your brain!"

Gaz rolled her eyes. "I'll grant that he's an idiot, Dib. But he isn't stupid like the Barbie twins over there. " She nodded in the direction of the twins. They were daintily putting food in their Barbie smiley mouths but it wasn't working as their teeth were still clenched. "So he won't try to pull anything on me. And you know what? Zim didn't choose which planet he was born on and as for Earth, that's just his job as you well know. Besides he's terrible at it.

"You don't have to worry," she continued, "we'll be commuting each day so I'll be home under your paranoid eyeball at night."

They looked over at Zim's table. Except for him and the parts strewn across the surface it was empty, just like every other day. Zim was soldering circuit boards and all manner of high-tech parts into a pair of devices. Blue arcing flashed about the space around him. Dib didn't even bother pointing these things out anymore. The last time he went on a Zim-is-an-alien rant, the students said they knew and that Zim was from Germany or Sweden. Then called him intolerant and threw apple cores. It wouldn't matter if Zim had an entire FTL hyperdrive from an Irken battle cruiser disassembled in the cafeteria, the blind would still not see.

"Dib, look at it this way. If he and I are busy with this competition, he can't take over the planet can he? And I'll be keeping an eye on him. Use the time to follow up on one of your paranormal investigations, or spend some time working with Tak's ship," Gaz tried to reason. The last suggestion was a subtle warning that she would play her trump card if she had to.

Zim had finished, put his tools back in his PAK, and was now walking in their direction. "Now you be nice or else," Gaz told her brother. He merely grunted.

"Gaz-zilla," Zim spoke up as he arrived at their table. "I have something here for starting our mutual project." He pulled out a brand-new GameSlave 4 with a stylized name inscribed in the front casing. _GAZ._

Her eyes widened along with her mouth. She was almost drooling. "Where did you get that? They're not due to be released for another year!"

Dib already looked like he was going to object, and Gaz pinched his leg hard. Just a reminder about being civil.

"My computer seems to have made a large investment in the company in my name without my approval, so it owed me a favor and Gir picked up a couple of end-stage prototypes with some other supplies. I have done some research on the competition, and it looks more complex than your brief explanation. Thus I have modified two GS4's with satellite communication units and circuitry from spare Pads, so we may practice the first stage of competing in any spare time you may have. They have been linked to my base's computer core to simulate the conditions of the event. This one is your's Gaz-zilla."

Zim scowled at Dib as he continued. "Unlike normal units, they are password protected and the base computer is covered by security firewalls. I have also included a DNA analyzer set for the Dib-stink. Allow me to demonstrate." With that he tossed the unit to Dib who caught it. He was immediately shocked and fell to the ground.

The green skinned alien walked over to pick up the GS4 and handed it over to Gaz who was jerking in silent laugher. "Thanks Zim, I love it." She was actually impressed by Zim's gesture. She'd have to get a stillshot of Dib being zapped from the hi-skool security cameras for Zim. It _was_ pretty good.

"We still need your GS3, and I have also obtained one for the competition. But I am puzzled by the scheduling. You say it is next weekend, but from press photos I've researched it seems that it usually takes place during your Halloweeny."

Gaz was puzzled. "No, its the same weekend every year. Wait, are you referring to the costumes? That's just cause some people like to dress up in uniform or make-believe fiction for the occasion." She paused, an idea to repay Dib for his earlier remarks coming to mind. It wasn't something she would ever do herself, but it would annoy her brother. "Say, why don't we go as Irken Invaders? You and me. That way you won't have to wear your disguise the whole time."

Zim pretended to ponder the thought for a moment. "Yes, this suggestion has a high Dib-stink irritation value. You have seem to have a great many today, Gaz-zilla." He pulled his Pad out of his PAK and began drafting again.

"Great, give you a lift after school?" Gaz asked, gathering up her lunch supplies. Zim did not trust, nor drive Earth transportation. Part of that was how when he was taking his driver's test to appear "normal," he had accidentally driven the test car into the DMV building. He had been asked never to apply again, and this was the same department that sent driver's licenses in the mail to the legally blind.

"Yes, that is satisfactory. Shall we begin?" He asked putting away the pad and pulling out his own GameSlave 4.

As the two began playing, Dib got up off the floor. He went back to picking at his lunch. This was a battle he knew he couldn't win. All he could hope for was to be the voice of reason for the moment. Unfortunately it seemed that voice was with Gaz right now.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I'm sure many of the CWZ game concepts here and in upcoming chapters are from numerous actual computer games. Can't give proper credit because the concepts are fairly basic and found pretty much everywhere. As usual I own nothing, have no money, and am not responsible.

* * *

After skool Zim rode back to his base in Gaz's jeep. It was an old model, black with dark violet striping running down the middle and along the side. They didn't say much, and it was a short drive anyway. Some of that may have had to do with Zim tightly clutching his seatbelt.

"Relax Zim, I'm not a bad driver like you are," Gaz remarked noticing Zim's tension.

"Zim is not impressed with the durability of Earth vehicles. Not used to the open air construction either," he gritted through his teeth.

Gaz thought a bit about this for a moment. Then she realized that Zim's upbringing probably had a lot to do with his current unease. After all he was trained to pilot spacecraft engineered to survive fighting in vacuum, and on native worlds where nuclear, chemical, and biological weapons could have been deployed against an Irken Invader. Or more likely by one. The slightest crack in a vehicle under such conditions meant a very ugly death, and here she was giving Zim a ride back home in a jeep with only a roll cage for a roof.

Zim had been on his absolute best behavior toward her at every encounter the whole day, had in fact given her not one but two fantastic gifts and agreed to join her so she could compete in something _she _wanted to do. Gaz inwardly kicked herself at the realization. She was not used to people deserving positive consideration. "Sorry Zim. I didn't think. We're almost there."

The alien beside her dipped his head in acknowledgement. "It is alright. Zim has adjusted over time to the foolishness of human design limitations."

He had in fact calmed down the phobia over Earth germs and a few other things, but that didn't mean he was rejoicing at the open air rushing over them. Gaz let off the gas pedal a bit and the vehicle slowed down some.

* * *

They arrived at Zim's house uneventfully. As they walked up to the men's room door that served as the entrance, it opened and Gir in his dog disguise rushed out and attached himself to Gaz's leg. "SCARY LADY CAME! I'm soooo haaaaaapy!" He pulled an object out of his head. "I made youuu a cupcake."

Gaz noted Zim giving her a warning shake of the head. "Umm, thanks Gir. I'll have it later. Can you keep it for me?"

"SUURE." With that Gir proceeded to dig a large hole in the front yard with a shovel he pulled also out of his head.

Once in the house Zim walked over to a nearby end table that was near the front door. "So what's wrong with Gir's cupcake?" Gaz asked as his back was turned.

"I can't supervise Gir while I'm at skool, so it may not be digestible by human standards. He's had a thing about soap lately. Plus he discovered the free toys in cereal boxes and sometimes he gets these ideas..."

Zim opened a drawer, keeping himself between it and Gaz, and lifted out an object. Closing the drawer he turned to face the human girl, handing her the object in his possession. "Last month Zim has found it necessary to upgrade base security again. Unfortunately Zim was overzealous with the IFF recognition protocols."

Gaz took it in her hand and made a quick examination. It looked like either a collar or a thick necklace, made of finely woven black metal and forming a V in the front. A faint green gem-like circle a half-inch across was embedded in the tip of the V. Zim continued, "This will act as a transponder so the computer will recognize you as a guest rather than an intruder. In case you have to use the, um, facilities." There was only the living room and kitchen on the surface level of Zim's base. "Under no circumstances should you put it on. Once the clasps link they fuse and it will be impossible to remove it off of your person without removing your head."

"What is it, an Irken slave collar or something?" she asked with distaste, carefully putting the collar in the discreet front pocket of her dress underneath her precious skull necklace.

"Yeah, something," Zim muttered turning toward the couch and pulling out his GameSlave. It was the only furniture in the sparse living room that people could sit on.

"Whatever," Gaz replied as she took a position on the other end of the couch with her own GameSlave in hand.

They had already spent that lunch going over some of the game basics. Now she was showing him various infantry equipment rigs and keypad combinations. Gaz had to admit that Zim had a very sharp learning curve. Not that he had a knack for doing things right, but he learned quickly as they ran linked team sessions against non-playable-characters.

* * *

Two hours later they were still on the couch punching away at the buttons on their GameSlaves. Gir had come in and settled down on the floor to watch the Angry Monkey Show. Neither Zim or Gaz paid attention as the show was just an angry monkey staring at the camera for all eternity. It had huge ratings.

"Okay Zim, let's move on to the vehicles." Gaz was starting to be impressed with Zim's learning curve. Oh, he was very prone to frustration but he kept telling himself that he was new to the control system and needed to train his muscle memory. And he still wasn't inclined to do things the right way, but Zim was trying to not intentionally annoy Gaz with his antics.

_Wow. Would you look at his potential,_ she thought. In only two and a half hours of game time he was at a point that most human players took a week at least to reach. He still didn't have much in the way of play tactics and strategy, but that would come later.

"YES! AT LAST!" Zim cried out as he guided his character straight toward the "front lines" section of the map, and the biggest vehicle in the game. The towering Armored Assault Walker.

"Zim! Where do you think your going? That's the most difficult thing to control in the whole game! We need to start you off in the light Ground Effect Vehicles first." Gaz had moments of frustration too.

"But but," Zim sputtered.

"Turn around or I'll show you how friendly fire works. And I don't mean in the game."

Zim resentfully turned his character around and followed Gaz's to the GEV staging area on their side of the map.

* * *

It was nearly 8:00 that night and Gaz felt like she wanted to burst out in either hysterical laughter or a scream and it seemed Zim was inclined to do the same.

Zim was a disaster driving _any_ GEV, and there were many of the hovering vehicles to choose from. They had started out on the scout cars. These were light and fast with a single automatic mini rail gun mounted on the roof. They were too fast for Zim to control, and with no contact with the ground there was no traction to help overcome inertia. He spent most of the time bouncing off of every tree, building and boulder in the environment.

Next they tried some of the other GEVs. The Armored Personnel Carrier carried a turreted medium Gauss autocannon with rear twin mortar tubes. In the game it was used primarily for escorting heavy armor against rocket infantry and aircraft threats. The Main Battle Tanks were slow beasts with a poor turn rate. But they carried a heavy phased plasma gun and twin light Gauss autocannons or unguided rockets depending on the type of unit. These heavy GEVs were more Zim's style, but he tended to run over his own team in the process and getting stuck between obstacles.

Then they tried the aircraft. These were not a significant portion of the game, and were used primarily for ground support. Sadly Zim's aircraft seemed to be equipped with ground-collision technology. Zim just was not a driver. He could handle the tactical system alright, but he needed Gaz to drive and that just would not work. They would be outnumbered in the competition by two and a half to one at a minimum. Running around in a single vehicle wasn't going to cut it, leaving them outnumbered by at least five to one.

It was getting on in the evening and Gaz had homework to do, plus she hadn't eaten dinner so she was hungry. "Okay Zim, let's call it a night." She was feeling a bit discouraged, not knowing how they would pull this off. It looked hopeless unless they could overcome the GEV problem. That was where the game's firepower was concentrated. Infantry did well against armor in jungle maps with lots of cover, but were too vulnerable and slow in open terrain like desert or grassland.

Zim wasn't about to give up so easily after being told how he was supposed to do things for two hours and being less than, well, impressive. "Not yet, Gaz-zilla. There is only one more vehicle to try."

Gaz groaned. He was already running his character over to the single Armored Assault Walker. The most complex and difficult vehicle in the game. It towered over everything else, riding on two hydraulic legs and heavily armored. The beast was even more heavily armed with rocket launchers carrying anti-aircraft, fire-and-forget anti-tank, in-direct fire fragmentation munitions, and even a couple of tactical nukes. Then there were the two heavy autocannons mounted on each wrist joint and a heavy plasma gun tucked inside both forearms. It was designed to dominate the combat zone, and as such usually turned into a fire magnet. But it was notoriously hard to control because it could do too many things at once.

The main body could rotate as the drive unit kept moving forward, and at the same time the arms could also rotate up and down. It sounded simple but was difficult tracking targets while navigating a massive object around numerous obstacles. Plus the missile system mounted on the back of the machine and over the shoulders required controlling a targeting system for areas behind blocking terrain while the projectile and energy weapons had direct line-of-sight. Those weren't even the advanced controls to deploy anti-missile decoys, electronic jamming and a host of other features. Most people who got in the thing used "stand-and-shoot" tactics, using the walker as a mobile fortress to control strategic choke-points on the map until the health points finally ran out and they bailed. It was one of those ideas that looked good on paper, but was a bit much for the limited control interface of the portable GameSlave. It was more suited for the desktop computer versions of the game and even then it was a challenge to use it to it's full potential.

"Okay Zim. Two minutes then I'm heading home," she said. Zim had made a good and _honest_ effort tonight, and if he wanted to try something that couldn't possibly work, she would humor him. Gaz powered down her own device and scooted over to watch on Zim's display.

Thirty seconds later Gaz's wide eyes were staring at the screen. Five minutes later her jaw was hanging open. When his character finally died he shut the gaming device down and got up off the couch to face his partner. "Eh," he muttered, unimpressed. "Zim is very rusty, and these buttons are still unfamiliar. Zim promises improvement, but it was only a first attempt."

Gaz just looked at him unable to find words. Zim had just _pulverized_ what she could have done in her best in-the-zone effort with the Assault Walker _and he thought it sucked!_ And on a portable GameSlave at that! She got up on her feet searching for words. "That...That was unbelievable Zim! I can't...can't." Gaz's brain finally caught up with her and remembered the first vehicle Zim ran for at the very beginning. "Wait a minute. _You knew!?_ This whole time and you knew you could run that thing?"

"Of course," Zim replied coolly. "But you wouldn't hear Zim out. Gaz-zilla needed to be taught to trust Zim when her partner knows what he is about."

Gaz was now realizing that she had been stepping on Zim's skills for over two hours and, without lifting a finger or implying any kind of threat, had just gotten even. On _her_. No one else had ever done so. Or been fearless enough to even try. She had not even seen it coming or had any defense against it. Zim had her hook, line and sinker and she didn't even have his usual Zim antics to deflect anything back toward the alien. Gaz was flabbergasted. "But you hadn't even heard of CWZ until today!"

"The game? Zim had the real thing on Irk!" the alien invader boasted.

"Real thing, as in actual experience? I thought Earth was your first assignment as an Invader and you've never had one of those operational here!" Gaz was searching through her memory trying to piece the puzzle together. The Zim she knew was an idiot and everything he had tried to do to conquer or destroy Earth had been thwarted by Dib (occasionally with her help) or self-destructed spectacularly. And some of those plans he came up with were pretty lame by themselves. Like the time he just walked around town tossing mutant rats through people's windows, which then ate the residents toilet paper supply.

"Yes, yes. Operation Impending Doom One was cancelled before the Armada could be deployed."

"Cancelled? Why?"

"Oh." Zim muttered as he turned to walk away. "Zim got...carried away. Zim started the invasion before we left our homeworld."

"You mean you cut loose on your own planet in one of those things?" Gaz asked pointing at Zim's GameSlave.

"Ha! That was a little brother compared to my Frontline BattleMech. At least six times as big," he replied proudly. Zim's face then turned a tad sheepish. "Devastated half of Irk before it was over." He walked over to a camouflaged elevator to go down into his lab.

Gaz was shocked. She just couldn't imagine the same Zim that had constantly failed in his mission on a hopelessly pathetic Earth could accidentally pull off something of that magnitude. "You mean with a full invasion marshaled for deployment, it took that long for your military to stop you?"

"No, no, no." Zim shook his head chuckling and began to descend down the shaft. "I blew up all the other invaders. It took that long for my unit's power cell to run out." And with that he disappeared into the base's depths.

Gaz didn't know how to process all of this. It just didn't fit with the image of Zim she had pictured for all these years, the bumbling buffoon. The girl turned to leave, fumbling to pull the transponder collar out of her dress' pocket so she could return it. Zim hadn't asked for it back, but he often forgot or overlooked important details. _Like departing from your own homeworld _before_ you cut loose, _she thought trying to digest that. Gaz went over to the end table and pulled open the drawer to return the collar to its place. Looking inside she let out an involuntary gasp.

Inside she saw a matching collar, but only one. With the size of the ego Zim carried around she would have expected dozens of the slave collars. But that wasn't what caused her to gasp. It was the other things located within. A few dozen pictures, notes, and pieces of debris. Each had her handwriting on them. Every single thing Gaz had slipped into Zim's locker over the years. It was a keepsake drawer.

Exactly like the one she had.

Gaz closed the drawer quickly, her mind telling her that this wasn't something Zim wanted anyone to see. The whole thing was screaming _private._ She placed the transponder collar she was holding on top of the end table and left the house.

As Gaz returned home and attended her homework, her mind buzzed with new thoughts, trying to reassemble her now fragmented picture of Zim. It didn't make sense. She pushed the sight of Zim's keepsake drawer into the back corner of her mind as she had too much to process at the moment. And truth to tell, some things she didn't want to process at all right now.

Like how that drawer in Zim's house said another word other than _private. _Just like her own keepsake drawer it had another word to say that she didn't want to think about.

_Treasured._


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: This is a long chapter, but there isn't really a good place to split it up. Also, the idea of Gaz watching Zim's early memories is not a new idea to Fanfiction, but has probably not been done in this way.

Thanks to those who are following this story, to Kaylee Or Something and Zerg170 for posting a review. Its very encouraging and is awesome motivation to keep things moving. You guys ROCK!

* * *

"Six Tangos coming in bearing zero-six-zero, two-by-two formation. One hundred yards."

_Crack crack_. "Make that four Tangos in cover, taking suppressive fire."

_Thump, thump, thump._ "I.F. outbound."

Gaz watched her GameSlave's display as she sat next to Dib and Zim in the cafeteria. Looking through her character's sniper scope she watched as Zim's mortar rounds walked up the enemy infantry formation. Two more went down. "Adjust twenty yards right." She spoke as she moved quickly toward her two o'clock direction.

_Thump, thump, thump_ went Zim's GameSlave, and his APC slowly moved forward along the road. They were practicing a light jungle map where the Assault Walker and most heavy armor could not maneuver freely and was easily brought down with hit-and-run rocket strikes from infantry moving in the heavy tree line. Zim was actually getting better with the Armored Personnel Carrier as long as he moved at a crawl while firing, and a little bit faster if he only focused on the road to get to the next position. His role right now was providing indirect fire with the mortar tubes to knock out Gaz's targets. Her role was to direct Zim's fire into the jungle before those targets could reach the road and get a clear line-of-sight on Zim with their shoulder-fired rockets.

The tactic they were developing for these kinds of terrain was not to destroy the enemy forces in the field, but to get Gaz's sniper closer to their spawn points where ammunition and health resupply posts were located and plant proximity mines. Then she would pull back into cover and wait for targets to make their way toward Zim or secure game objectives while he played distraction further down the line. They were playing to Gaz's strengths right now, being unnoticed and underhanded. Her strikes were constant, invisible and spiked without warning when a mine exploded, like a storm's wind. Zim's "strength" (or weakness depending on the circumstances) was being a very visible and localized point of chaos spewing out overwhelming and often unnecessary force, like a tornado.

The wind and the whirlwind.

In fact that was now their CWZ user names. Naturally Gaz came up with Zim's after the first evening. And just as naturally it took three more days for Zim to figure out one for Gaz. But the time had paid off as it suited her favorite style of play. Moving around unseen while her victims felt her presence as they went down.

It was now Friday and over the week they had improved Zim's handling of the control interface drastically, and were now developing coordinated tactics for various conditions they would have to face in the upcoming competition. The two had stopped playing against solely game controlled units (although those were usually present on any multi-player map to make things more interesting) and were now engaged with players controlled by Zim's base computer.

They paid no attention to Dib, and he was not happy with the situation. He had nothing he could rightly complain about either. Dib knew this because he had watched Zim's house from nearby bushes for the first couple of nights, and it was just Zim and Gaz sitting on the couch jabbing at buttons and occasionally a verbal jab at each other. He had stopped his constant surveillance when he discovered his bush happened to be one that the neighborhood dogs frequently marked. After all, Dib had only so many changes of clothes he could go through in a week.

It was nearing the end of the lunch period and Dib gathered his garbage and leftovers to throw away, sighing as he did so. Gaz's response was to call out a warning about air support and Zim's GameSlave answering with a near beam of tracer fire into the virtual sky from his turreted autocannon's 50 rounds per second. A tiny shoulder-fired anti-aircraft rocket joined the spray before Gaz switched back to her character's sniper rifle.

Dib walked away talking to himself as quietly as he could while he headed to his next class early. He felt torn in two about all this. On the one hand, he was glad his dear sister was interacting with another living being and not so isolated, even spending time outside the house. Unfortunately it was at Zim's which was bad in Dib's book, and the evil alien was not to be trusted. Zim _always_ had some vile scheme or experiment up his sleeve. On the other hand, he _was_ very occupied with Gaz's preparations for the CWZ convention which meant that Zim's plots to conquer Earth seemed to be put on hold, which was good. To top it off Gaz actually sounded, well, like she had a smallest spark of life within her again and wasn't _only_ the embodiment of doom and wrath. Just mostly. Being excited (even if she was pretending otherwise) about this convention seemed good for her. But why did it have to be with Zim?

"Arrrgh!" he muttered to himself as he walked down the hallway. A guy could be driven crazy going around in circles like that. Perhaps Gaz was right and he should take a break from his Zim-mania.

Zim on the other hand thoroughly enjoyed watching Dib's inner conflict out of the corner of his eye during his lunch practices with Gaz. It was definitely worth holding off on the hypno-chicken operation to see the Dib-stink squirm over nothing. Plus he actually _liked _wrecking pretend havoc with the human girl. She was _good_, and for the first time in his life Zim was content with the whole teamwork thing. _Yes,_ the alien invader thought to himself, _this is definitely a good thing._

Gaz just focused solely on the game. She didn't want to question why Zim was the way he was, or think about how he could be so idiotic and yet have bouts of intelligence. She didn't want to think about that stupid keepsake drawer she stumbled on at Zim's place either. Or that Zim was becoming as good and perhaps eventually even better than her at this game. Or that she didn't mind having a partner and for once the invader made a decent teammate. Or think that the green skinned alien was actually measuring up lately. And she_ definitely _didn't want to think about how much she inwardly denied enjoying playing with Zim along for the ride, antics and all.

So Gaz just focused on her GameSlave and slipped back into the zone before lunch could end. After all, in another week the two of them would be ready to utterly destroy the competition. And _that_ would truly be a blast.

* * *

Gaz parked her Jeep in the usual place in front of Zim's house and the two climbed out of the vehicle. As she walked around the front of her Jeep a crash erupted from the front door of the house and Gir rocketed outside.

"GAAAAZYYY!" the dog-disguised robot screeched in sheer joy launching into her on jets of blue flame. "GAAZY's HOME!"

Gir caught Gaz just below the rib cage. She spread her hands out to break her fall, earning her cuts and scrapes on her palms when they landed ten feet away.

"GIR!" Zim yelled. "What have I told you about greeting the Gaz-zilla?" He was now rushing over to help his partner up.

"I don't knowww," came the response while Gir held a death-hug on Gaz as she tried to push him off and get back on her feet with some dignity intact.

"You were told to not do anything that could break Gaz! I told you yesterday, the day before, and this morning too! Why do you have to be so... so... you?" Zim ranted.

_Yeah, look who's talking Zim, _Gaz thought. _Like two demented peas in a pod._

"But I like Gazzy," Gir exclaimed as Zim tugged on his legs.

"That's okay Gir," Gaz grunted between squeezings. "But if you don't let me go, how will you bake me my muffin?"

"MUFFINS!" Gir cried out and blasted back into the house.

Zim grabbed her wrists and helped Gaz back up onto her feet. "Are you broken?"

"Nah," she returned examining her slightly bloody palms. "Just a few scrapes."

"Well, let's hurry up and get you to the medical bay."

"It's nothing, Zim. Really," she said as they entered the house.

Zim opened the drawer and casually tossed her a transponder collar which she just as casually caught in an injured hand. She was just grateful for being distracted by her cuts and Gir's antics. She didn't want to remember what she knew about that drawer. So no one noticed that the gem-like sphere embedded in the collar made contact with her cut palm. It took only the barest trace of blood for the DNA sampler to analyze and no time at all. Neither Zim nor Gaz noticed the small sphere touching Gaz's injury flash from slight green to the deepest of reds as she placed it in her pocket.

Zim quickly led her to the couch and pushed a button causing it to rise in the air and expose the lift platform underneath. "What's the rush? Its just a scrape." Gaz inquired.

Zim just pointed toward the kitchen as they walked onto the platform. Through the doorway Gaz could see Gir shoving a doughy mass shaped like a jackhammer into the kitchen stove. It still had an air hose attached. "Uh, right," was her only reply as they descended into Zim's base.

* * *

One entity within the base _did_ notice the change in the collar's transponder signal. Computer did its duty, grumpily updating its recognition and authorization codes and voice print IDs. It had much more important things to do than this. Another celebrity was adopting some young kid from the backwoods in the middle of nowhere. The online tabloids were reporting that this one had been raised by badgers instead of wolves. Now _that_ was worth looking into...

A brief update was posted on the main screen in the computer lab and quickly vanished.

_New Base Personnel Registered: Gazlene Membrane_

_ Status: Invader Operations Counterpart... Full Access Granted_

_ Security Clearance Authorized: Imperial Military Grade Three._

It seemed the most appropriate classification to apply to the Membrane girl given that they had been working together for the past week. Nothing in its database really matched exactly. Of course with Zim running things that was perfectly normal. Computer had also figured a grade three clearance to be sufficient for the time being. It wasn't _that_ high anyway, and any partner of Zim's would need to get caught up to speed on at least the basics of various operations, numerous other happenings and material available. So it got a head start on the paperwork and sent it off for processing. It had taken ten seconds to get the forms approved, no problem. Computer was the one after all that had to deal with bureaucracy and supply requisition. It had become fluent in the ways of wheeling and dealing. With Zim for a master, it had to know how to get things done. It could even get through Earth paper-pushing at need. Now _that _was something to be proud of.

Besides, if something happened to Zim the computer could always bump up Gaz's clearance to just about anything needed for the mission to continue. You just had to send in the right number of forms. After all, its not like organic eyes were part of the bureaucratic process. Far too slow and inefficient. Just computers sending forms to other computers.

_Now back to the Badger kids,_ the computer thought. _That's hot news!_

* * *

Gaz's most minor of injuries was treated quickly while Zim removed his disguise and muttered to himself about Gir's constant recklessness. He was now wanting to run a full scan to check for broken bones and organ damage just to be safe. Gaz of course protested such as idiocy. If she had been that injured she would have either noticed or been unconscious.

Zim countered that she was there, the scanner was also there, and she had been given a hug-of-doom by a crazy and affectionate robot. There was no way her mere human senses could be as definite as his superior Irken medical technology. Gaz told him to stuff it. He told her that the scan had finished while they were arguing. She threw a chair. Zim ran another scan on himself.

After they got that nonsense out of their system, the two walked into the computer lab where Zim had two desktops hooked up back-to-back so they could begin on those versions of CWZ. This was new to Gaz. It was a similar setup to their GS4's with the base computer playing opponent characters. She had to admit that she wasn't as used to the mouse and keyboard controls since she had always been a GameSlave freak. Also new to her were several auxiliary features that would prove useful regarding the mini-map for plotting positions to share with teammates and other command-and-control goodies. Mostly unnecessary in her solo-player point of view, but their opponents would know how to use them so they needed to as well.

The desktops booted up and the Human and Irken began their session. Gaz had to admit that the graphics were much better than the GS3, but her new GS4 was pretty close, but the desktops could still display a far greater field of view. Regardless, with the modifications Zim had made to the GS4 it surpassed most Earth civilian computer models. After all, most didn't have encrypted satellite communications, touch-screen keyboard interface, blah, blah. After all, it was equipped from parts from Zim's remote Pads which were really an extension of the base computer itself. Plus it could play games. After all, you had to have your priorities in order.

After about two hours Gaz was getting the new control hotkeys down. It was a bit simpler than the multi-button commands sometimes needed on the GameSlave, but still needed getting used to. She was playing as her usual sniper riding a Scout GEV and running far ahead of Zim's Walker. He was sitting opposite her and was already in the zone.

_Well_, Gaz silently pondered, _you can't really call what ever that is in-the-zone. It's like whenever Zim gets in any walker a switch flicks on in his head and he's immediately on fire. No, that doesn't do it justice either. Zim absolutely __shines.__ Why can't he do that in anything else? And let's not get started about in real life where he can be such an idiot. And his tactics when I let him off the leash and he really cuts loose is absolutely insane. Everything he does is just so wrong, but he pulls it off brilliantly. No one can predict it, defend against it, or adapt to it, or even emulate it in return. _Gaz smiled to herself. She guided her character out of the area.

"I'm clear," Gaz told Zim. She had learned early on to stay clear of Zim when the time came to let him cut loose. Team kills were a hazard and Zim really racked them up along with everything else. "Armor column at you're eleven o'clock, air support flanking at your three, one mile out. Mechanized infantry support dug in due north. Have fun."

Zim red eyes brightened and grinned from "ear-to-ear" (since Irkens didn't have ears) and even his antenna looked perky as he went into full destructo mode and charged in like a rampaging bull laughing like the maniac he was. He didn't care at these moments about mission objectives, team goals, or much of anything past the category of '_does it move?' _and '_can it go boom?'_ That was Gaz's job, and that was where _she_ shined.

Before she would start skirting around the disaster zone that was Zim, she took a minute. _Sometimes its just nice to sit back and watch chaos reign supreme,_ she thought to herself. _Whirlwind, our competition isn't going to know what hit them._

After a few minutes a loud boom echoed through the underground base and Gaz looked at Zim. Although she had been down here on several occasions over the years, she wasn't at all familiar with it. This was Zim's domain. But even to her this didn't feel like one of Gir's kitchen explosions. Red alarm lights began flashing and caught Zim's attention.

"Computer! What is happening?" he demanded.

"Master. Another containment breach in pod seven beta," the computer droned, sounding bored.

Zim got up. "Gir!" he howled, "how many times have I told you to leave the napalm squirrels alone!?"

"Napalm squirrels?" his partner asked.

"Yeah, spits fire. Didn't turn out like I planned," Zim shrugged the question off. "You should stay here while Gir and I deal with this." He ran off muttering. "Those things get _everywhere._ Such a pain to clean up. Gir! Prepare the neurotoxin spray! Computer, quarantine the lab!"

"Yes, Master," came the reply. With that the doors to the room slammed shut behind Zim, leaving Gaz alone in the sealed computer lab. "Um, computer? Will this take long?"

"Mostly likely not, unless they get in the ventilation system again. Then it can take hours."

"_Hours!?"_ Gaz protested. "If they can get in there, what if they get outside?"

"Then it could take days."

"Okay, computer that ain't happening. Has Zim sealed off the perimeter yet?"

"Of course not. He's Zim." No further explanation was necessary.

Gaz shook her head. There was no way she was going to spend the whole weekend locked in this room. But she couldn't exactly give the computer orders. She was just a guest on Zim's base. But maybe she could make a suggestion. "Computer, perhaps you should go ahead and lock up the base since Zim forgot to mention it."

"Yes, Mistress. Base lockdown initiated." Faint groans, clicks, and slams were heard far off around the base.

_Mistress? What's that all about? Zim must of gone overboard with the guest side of that IFF transponder as well as the intruder side. That actually makes sense knowing Zim. I could so just see him doing that on accident too._

Gaz figured she ought to call her worrisome brother and let him know she might be late getting home tonight. She pressed a small button on her wristwatch. Dib's face appeared a moment later.

"Gaz! Are you okay? Did Zim plant nanobots in your brain? I can-"

"Shut up, Dib!" Gaz scowled extra heavy. _What is it with Dib always assuming Zim's trying to put stuff in my brain? _"I'm fine but I may be getting back a bit late. Some of Zim's squirrels got loose and he has to deal with it. Seems he's doing something with neurotoxins, so I'm sealed here with Computer under quarantine until it clears and I've put the rest of the base on lockdown. Nothing gets in or out. That means you, _Dib._"

She paused long enough for that to sink in and continued before he could utter something stupid. "I'm just letting you know I'm okay. Now relax and go do whatever else you do, but if you even think about coming here or say anything other than 'good night, Gaz' I'll save one of those napalm squirrels, drop it down your shorts then give you an atomic wedgie every day for the next year."

"Uh. Okay. Good night, Gaz." came the cowed reply. Dib reluctantly signed off.

Gaz sat down in a chair in front of Computer and closed her eyes for several minutes grasping the bridge of her nose. She took in a deep breath and let out a long sigh. "Computer, you've worked with Zim this whole time. Why is he so…so…"

"Defective?"

"Well, I would have said idiot, but yeah."

"Mistress, Zim is not technically an idiot. He is a defective. PAK serial number 1242-G43-JK217 is malfunctioning."

This was news to Gaz in ways she couldn't even ponder right now. "And a PAK is important because?"

"A PAK is a standard utility device grafted to every Irken upon hatching and activation. It serves as a secondary electronic brain and regulates several bio functions. Included are his identity and personality as well as storage for most immediately essential tools and equipment," the computer recited. "Zim's PAK however was also supposed to be an advanced experimental prototype. It did not meet expectations and proved to be defective."

Gaz was stunned at learning this. And that the computer was so being to free to share. "So Zim is, well, the way he is because some regulatory glitches in his personality? Can't he fix it or get a new one?"

"No, defectives are deactivated. Yet somehow fortune always seems to favor Zim so no attempt to do so has ever succeeded. However, repairs to the personality matrix would be very destructive, possibly causing total erasure. He would not survive any attempt. Even if a replacement could be done, the person known as Zim would be destroyed."

There were too many questions forming in her head at the moment, so she asked the one that was poking around for the past week. "Then why is it when he gets in the walker in our game he does so well? He's unbelievable!"

"Yes, Mistress. It is an anomaly due to the experimental nature of the PAK. It seems that piloting walker class assault vehicles is the only time his PAK begins to function anywhere close to it's design parameters. The personality regulation still is barely functional, but the rest of the processing and analytical functions approach their actual potential. It is tragic in a way, as it is the only time he can taste the greatness he could have been if he had not been a defective. And the only time he can operate at his truest potential. It is also the reason he was reprogrammed after the Irk disaster and banished to Foodcourtia."

Gaz was having trouble keeping up. She knew about Zim's _performance_ on Irk, but not what happened afterward. "What do you mean reprogrammed and banished? He's an Invader on a mission to conquer this planet. He's been trying for years."

"Zim's PAK was reprogrammed for the fast food industry and banished from Irken military service. He quit his exile when he learned about Operation Impending Doom II. Zim was then given his assignment when he wouldn't take no for an answer."

Gaz inwardly face palmed. _Oh God, Zim would so do just that too. _"So why did they send him to Earth if it was on their target list? That makes no sense." Gaz was starting to get a real bad feeling about now.

"They didn't know about Earth. I've got his orders here. They literally sent Zim off the edge of the map and told him to conquer a planet that wasn't supposed to exist. Here are the original records."

_Zim. _Gaz's mind was spinning now, fitting the few puzzle pieces she had together and her eyes were starting to open. _You poor fool, Zim._ She could start to feel a crack open in her steel heart.

_ Oh God, this mission is _everything_ to him. It's all he has. It's all he __is.__ And he's not even registered as an invader. His PAK is still programmed to be a dang food service drone! Its like asking a pizza delivery guy to go conquer a whole planet single handedly with minimal support. And yet he's nearly succeeded time after time. If another Invader had been sent here on a real conquest mission and backed up like an invader is supposed to be we never would have stood a chance._

_ If he ever finds out… it would destroy him. Perhaps that's why he doesn't know. I mean a blind person could see it if they checked up on it, it's right there in his service record and original orders! No planet listed. Just an empty sector of space. Perhaps it's not that he's an idiot to not see, but that somehow he knows on some instinctive level that finding out would kill him. Anyone can refuse to know something that they really don't want to know, can't they? _

_Why didn't they just deactivate him? Why did they toy with him all these years? How could they do that to my _friend_?_

_ Oh CRAP! How the hell did _THAT_ happen? How did he sneak in there?_

Gaz did not make friends. She kept people out. But the flawed alien had somehow accidentally forged something with her. Perhaps the elements had been there all these years waiting for the right combination. Their partnership wasn't exactly a friendship at all, more of an alliance, but Zim was the best friend she had. Gaz just hadn't realized it until now. And now there was no going back.

That was the real reason Gaz kept people out. Once some one got in she could never leave, only become left behind which would wound her heart. That was why she had such heavy armor surrounding her and kept everyone at a distance. But she couldn't go back now, especially not after this terrible knowledge. She couldn't abandon Zim after everyone else in the universe had tried to cast him off or get rid of him. Unfortunately she didn't know how to go forward either, and Zim wasn't the make-me-a-friend type. He was supposed to be an invader after all. Friends wasn't in the job description.

"Computer? Can you show me Zim? From the beginning?"

"Yes, Mistress. His PAK records his memories and are downloaded each time he sleeps for maintenance."

Gaz watched as the highlights of Zim's life passed before her sight on the large monitor before her. She saw everything with opened eyes. As she watched the Planet Jackers steal Earth to throw into their sun, a tear crawled down her face as she watched Zim deliberately take a savage beating as a distraction while Earth was freed from its fiery fate. Gaz realized she was watching a hero sacrifice himself for the good of the mission. A delinquent, stuck-up, pig headed, egomaniac of a hero saving Earth for all the wrong reasons. Namely so HE could destroy it later, but one none-the-less.

And Gaz realized something else at that point. If it wasn't for Zim, she would have died long ago had the Earth been burned up along with everyone else. The _only_ reason she wasn't dead was because of Zim, and she was the only human who had a clue. This alien who repeatedly failed in his mission to enslave or destroy Earth had successfully saved it, on more than one occasion too. If he had been smart he would have let it happen and then claimed the credit for himself.

Gazlene Membrane was alive because her alien friend was a relentless, uncompromising, proud, fearless, dedicated and wonderful idiot.

* * *

It was hours later and Zim had finally finished cleaning up after the squirrel escape and decontamination. He canceled the base lockdown and walked into the computer lab and _WHAT WAS THIS!? HOW DARE SHE!_ Zim was enraged seeing Gaz at _his_ place before _his_ computer core accessing who knows what.

"What are you doing?" he cried in his shrillest voice, pointing a finger at her. "Did you think you could snoop through ZIM's files just because you were invited into my lair? Are you in league with the Dib-stink!? GET OUT! Get out of my base and don't come back!"

Gaz had jumped at his voice. She knew she was busted and Zim could be almost as paranoid as Dib.

As she drew near he noticed something he had never witnessed before. Tears on Gaz's face. Whatever she was looking at caused her to cry. _Her,_ the Gaz-zilla! As she passed, Gaz stopped next to Zim.

"Just so you know," she told him in a quiet voice without a hint of threat, "I didn't go digging for anything behind your back. Your computer decided to show me some things so I could understand you better. But you are right, and I wouldn't like anyone poking their nose in my memories either. I am sorry, Zim. I promise I will made this right somehow."

With that Gaz Membrane, probably the most talented and intimidating agent of doom Zim had ever known leaned in and planted a soft tender kiss on his cheek. Zim shrank back expecting the traces of watery stuff from her lips to burn his skin. Instead his cheek tingled like a sensation of dancing.

"What was that for?" the alien nearly shouted, confused and in way over his head at the moment.

Gaz looked at the floor. "Long time ago you saved my life, Zim." she carefully spoke. "I never knew until now. I guess it's sort of a tradition thing." Then she slugged his arm. "And _that_ is for all the times you tried to blow up my planet with _me_ on it!"

And with that Gaz ran out of the room and out of the base, just like Zim had demanded of her. Within a few hours of realizing she had something that could be sort of categorized as a friendship, she had been rejected. Even if it was just an overreaction on Zim's part.

Zim was irritable, feeling territorial, and was just plain confused. He had had a long day, and sadly it didn't seem like it was over yet. He was definitely going to have a very long conversation with that blasted computer. Then perhaps tonight a small test release of the hypno-chicken operation would help him blow off some steam.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: In the last chapter I focused on Gaz gaining insight of why Zim is the way he is, and perhaps coming to know Zim better than he knows himself. This is in many ways part 2 of chapter 6.

Early in this chapter I will be writing in Gaz's recurring nightmare. I vaguely touched on it's existence in chapters 2 & 3. Just letting you know so you can recognize what it is and avoid some confusion. Since I have no idea what a girl's nightmare would be like, I've given it a vague CWZ feel since Gaz has been working so much on that game in the story.

After a few weeks I've decided to toss in a theme song for this chapter. I found a fitting video on YouTube titled ZAGR- To the Moon and Back featuring the song by Savage Garden. After seeing it, I added this little note to the chapter.

Thanks to Madiphan99 for your review. Its much appreciated!

Also no chickens were harmed in the writing of this chapter.

* * *

Gaz slammed the door to her house_ hard_ as she walked in. _Stupid Zim,_ she thought to herself. Not that she was really angry with him. She understood his reaction and that Zim was over-responding to an unwelcome intrusion into his personal life. Just as he was excessive in nearly everything else he did. It was his nature to be over-the-top. She was just upset and didn't have a specific target to hurl it at. And anger was familiar territory for her, much more than sorrow was.

Dib was sitting in his light blue pajamas at the bottom of the stairs leading to the bedrooms. Not unexpected as it was almost eleven o'clock and his sister had just been quarantined inside an alien base being sprayed with neurotoxin. He had more than usual reason to be worried. It was annoying. Gaz did NOT want to deal with anything right now.

"Glad you're back," Dib greeted her. "You okay?"

"Peachy," was her only reply as she moved to the stairs.

Dib stood up, blocking her path. He made a quick examination of his sister. Her eyes were indeed red and puffy. Gaz was definitely not fine.

"No you're not," Dib stated. "I can run some scans. Figure out what Zim did to you…"

Gaz grabbed her brother by the collar and shoved him against the wall. "SHUT UP, STUPID!" she yelled. Gaz then let him go. "Just zip it," she nearly whispered as she headed up to her room.

Dib was still very concerned. "Please, Gaz. What happened? You're my baby sister. If something happens to you…" he dropped off.

Now _that_ got through to Gaz, so she stopped at the head of the staircase and looked down at her worried brother. "Its nothing. Zim and I had a misunderstanding and he threw me out, that's all."

Dib just looked at her without comprehension. She knew his worry would not let it go at that and neither of them would get any sleep. "The base computer showed me some things concerning Zim I wasn't supposed to find out about. Not even he knows about this stuff."

Dib's anti-Zim curiosity peeked its head. "What did you find? Battle plans? New weapons development?" Another pause. "Any thing we can use against him?"

_SMACK!_ Dib landed on the floor with the heaviest of thuds. He was now laying face first on the floor. As he pushed himself up, he felt a steel-toed boot planting itself on his back. It was not done lightly.

"Now you listen up real good, Dib, " came a growl from behind. "I will only say this once. I can't talk to you about this. You're his biggest enemy, and keeping Zim in the dark is the only thing protecting him. And I _will _protect him. You can't be trusted against the temptation to use anything to beat him because you don't understand."

Her foot lifted off of Dib's back, and Gaz crouched next to him. "I do, and I wish so much that I didn't. You _know _what kind of burden knowledge can be, Dib." She spoke in a hushed tone at this. "I need you to trust my judgment here."

Dib turned himself over and sat up. He did indeed know what kind of burden knowing something could be, especially when one didn't ask for it. Gaz continued. "Computer also showed me Zim's memories. Nothing held back. It was… personal, and that's when Zim caught me and told me to get out."

Gaz held out a hand and helped her brother back up on his feet. "You may be an expert on the Invader, Dib. But that's all you've ever seen. The invasive species. I know Zim _the person,_ and I now know him better than he knows himself. Perhaps better than his own people. _Never_ ask me to use that against him."

Something about that last sentence caused Dib to remember something Zim had said the previous Monday. _"No. You don't do that too someone...who is not a stranger. Even Zim knows that would be vile."_

_No_, Dib realized, _Zim won't use what he personally knows of Gaz against her, and Gaz won't use deep personal knowledge against Zim. Even shield him from it if necessary. To do otherwise would be a violation of some unwritten code I don't know about, because I'm an investigator and a scientist whereas they are fighters. Some weapons you just don't employ against someone you know, not without drastic reason and as a last resort._

_ I fight against Zim because no one else can or will, but it's not who or what I am. I don't live in their world._

"Okay, Sis," Dib decided. Zim may be the most untrustworthy person he knew, but Gaz was utterly reliable. In fact that reliability was what made her so scary. Even when she was coming to bring wholesale doom to your very existence Gaz was nothing but reliable. "But I still have to stop Zim's plans."

"I know," came the smiling reply, "and I'm still not getting involved. But I will if you try to do anything too permanent to Zim, just like the times he's crossed the line against you. It goes both ways now."

* * *

Gaz was moving fast through the urban landscape, ducking past dumpsters, cars and other assorted obstacles found along a city street. Almost running, hunched over to keep a low profile while not slowing her down, and neither was she moving in a straight line. Danger was all around, as well as the animal call for panic. She could sense people around her, most scared and on the run. Others moving quickly and with purpose. Some of those were on her side, many others not. Bad events were happening all around her, but she never saw it as she swept through in her frantic search.

She sensed the impact of heat from sudden gusts of flame and the intent of small weapons. They were being pushed back, but Gaz was alone. One of her people was missing in the action and she couldn't leave that one behind. The weapon in her hands weighed nothing, and she never used it. It was just there as she ran forward and around corners. Gaz had no concern for herself, but she just had to find the missing. That need to find that person before disaster did and pull him/her out was overwhelming and consuming.

Nothing else mattered. She turned a corner, dodging hostile searchers she only knew was approaching, and ran harder. Her breath was heavy, heart pounding. Failure was extremely possible, even probable. Yet she could _not_ afford failure. It was the one thing she couldn't afford.

Search after search yielded empty locations. Gaz was running out of time. She paid no heed to the sense of dangers around her.

"No! Don't Go!" she called out. "Call out to me. I'll find you!"

Gaz overturned empty boxes and obstacles where a wounded or incapacitated person might seek cover from the threats surrounding them.

"Don't leave me! I won't find you!"

But Gaz never could find the missing. No matter what she did or where she looked the missing stayed missing. Time did not matter and effort didn't alter the results.

* * *

Gaz awoke with a massive start yelling something unintelligible. She sat up in her bed, drenched in sweat and smelling of panicked stress. Her heart was practically jumping out of her chest and her lungs sucking in air as if none was left to breathe in. The soaked girl sat there for what seemed like a minute before she climbed out of bed.

The alarm clock was reading 4:21am and Gaz muttered to herself as she stripped her saturated bedding and carried it to the laundry. She really hated these nightmares, hated feeling like she had any weakness whatsoever. The dreams themselves weren't all that bad. There were no smells, sounds, touch, or even much in the way of sight. Mostly backgrounds you would expect walking along any street. No people either. It was the intense knowing and emotions that got to her. The sense of all those things being present was what made it seem so real.

These things were fairly rare but when she had one it could be powerful. And tonight's was by far the worst she'd had in a long, long time.

Dib stumbled in as Gaz was loading the washing machine, but he didn't say a word. He just turned around and returned a minute later with two of the largest glasses of water he could find. She guzzled both, dehydrated and returned the glasses without a reply. She knew she was a mess, and her brother offered no comment. Dib was there in case his sister needed him and Gaz never wanted to.

Gaz also never spoke about her nightmares, not to anybody. So Dib just offered what little support she would accept because feeling weak made her feel worse.

As the washing machine started, Gaz sat on the lid in silence. She pulled out her GameSlave and began to play. She wasn't getting back to sleep anytime soon. "Sorry I woke you."

Dib silently waved it off as if it were no problem. He was half asleep and leaning against the doorway.

Gaz didn't want to think, but her game felt empty, like it was missing something. She was very tired, but too wound up to rest. And deep down she knew why she had a nightmare. Part of it was the knowledge of tonight, another was the emotional stress involved. Gaz knew she had to make things right with Zim, but in a way that was equal to the perceived offense.

She hopped off the humming washing machine turning off the game and approached her brother. "You can go back to bed," she told Dib. "But I think there is something I need to take care of before I can turn in."

Dib eyed his sister. They lived in a good neighborhood and only about seven blocks from where she would need to go. Gaz could take care of herself around here, even at night. She didn't carry pepper spray or mace, but often a switchblade and brass knuckles in her boots. Gaz was simply not someone to mess with lightly. Dib simply nodded "All right, but you might want to wash up first." With that he went back to bed.

Gaz cleaned up and put on fresh clothes. Then she pulled the flesh-eating security dolls off of her shelves. She knew how she could even things up with Zim. However she didn't like it one bit. She was apprehensive but like she told her brother, she had to take care of this. Plus it was a nice night for a walk.

* * *

Zim walked home alone kicking at whatever loose debris was along his path. This had not been a good night in many ways. He had driven Gaz-zilla out first of all, which he had every right to. Then he learned that, while she had indeed trespassed with his computer, it hadn't been her fault. She had not hacked the system, and his human partner hadn't gone looking for secrets or anything like that. In fact most of what the computer showed her was things he would brag about had he had anyone to brag to.

Of course she wanted to know more about the AMAZING ZIM! Who wouldn't? If his mission wasn't so secret he'd probably have his own fan club right now. Yes, even though Zim did not make mistakes, he had overreacted a little bit. Unfortunately he did not know how to clear things with Gaz-zilla. Not without looking foolish after telling her not to return.

To top everything off, the test run of the hypno-chicken operation didn't go exactly according to plan. Most of the urban area was covered with buildings, and chickens had a way of wandering off of narrow sidewalks. That left the streets with enough room for the chickens to do their work, but only at night was traffic light enough to deploy them.

Unfortunately late Friday night proved to be the wrong time to send out his latest mechanism of conquest. Zim had not realized the bars were closing. Intoxicated motorists and wandering chickens did not mix well. Especially when those intoxicated motorists fell under hypnotic trances and forgot they were driving. The only results Zim had achieved were several dozen traffic accidents and about fifty arrested drunk drivers. Absolutely pathetic. The streets were now actually safer! Zim would seriously need to rethink his plan.

As Zim walked up the path to his front door he noticed something sitting on the front step.

Gaz-zilla!

"Hey Zim," she said. "Gir said you weren't home, so I waited out here."

She was wearing her black coat, sweat pants and her hair was mildly damp, but brushed. In her lap was a large square and metal plated object. Perhaps Gaz was going to squish Zim in those plates.

"I know I was wrong when I didn't stop Computer when I realized I was watching your memories. I know how you are about exposure, Zim, and I would have responded the same way. I told you I'd make it right, so here I am." Gaz lifted up the object in her hands and held it out to Zim.

Zim silently took it. It was two metal plates, hinged along one side with a heavy padlock on the other. Thick too. He also noticed Gaz smelled heavily of soap and traces of stress stink. He knew most humans including Gaz should be heavily asleep as it was nearly five in the morning, and not bathing this late at the night. Plus this could have waited until the sun was up as it wasn't exactly ultra-urgent. _Did she have another nightmare?_ he asked himself.

Gaz produced a key and removed the padlock, sticking it in her pocket. "These are my memories, Zim. I went through yours, so you can go through mine."

And with that she walked around Zim and moved down the path leading to the street. Zim did not turn to watch her go, but entered his house and closed the door. He climbed on the couch to examine the object in his hand.

It was a heavy book with steel sheets riveted to the front, back and spine with small hinges connecting them and the locking pieces spot welded to the opening side. The whole construction said Gaz-zilla seriously wanted people to stay out of whatever was inside. Zim opened the cover and read the wording between the two skulls on the opening page.

_Gaz's Diary_

_If you know this exists, its already too late._

This was not exactly encouraging for Zim, but Gaz had expressly given him this as a peace offering and expected him to read it. So he began. Zim did not really read most of it at first. It was typical useless annoying average girl writings about blah blah blah. It did not sound like Gaz-zilla at all. First he wondered if it was a fake, but that was really stupid. It was all happy and smiley with crude barely recognizable drawings of horses and hearts. And the handwriting was indeed terrible and so big. Looked like it was written in wax.

As he continued turning pages, it eventually toned down. And as the handwriting improved, the pages also got darker in color. Skulls had replaced horses. Ink replaced wax. Writings of happy events were replaced by the doom of annoying people. It was indeed the Gaz-zilla.

Zim had missed something important, so he went back to the beginning and read carefully, but quickly. It wasn't the individual details he was paying attention to. This book almost covered her entire life starting when she was a tiny smeet first writing, and there were many pages. But Zim saw Gaz's story.

It started out fairly average except for one element. Gaz had a mother. He knew this, but never questioned why a female parent was not present. After all the male parent wasn't present much either. But apparently that's not how it had always been. They had once been very much involved at the beginning before their careers had found sure footing. Both had been scientists, Professor Membrane in the physical sciences, and the mother in life sciences observing animals in the wild.

The name of the mother was never mentioned, and slowly faded from the scene. But it was clear what had happened. The career out in the wild had taken over, for Mrs. Membrane also had a similar obsessive streak that the Professor had showed for as long as Zim had been on Earth.

Gaz's mother had simply forgot that she once had a family. That she had once had a son and daughter. Unlike the Professor, she didn't even try to remember. All that was left was watching baboons scratch their behinds on stumps for years on end. Gaz's father was almost as non-existent now, but hadn't actually forgot his children.

Yet.

And Gaz had no illusions about that fact.

His work was just vastly more important than his children. And he couldn't have picked them out of a crowd unless they were at home. He thought he could be in two worlds at once by sending hovering holo-communicators and devices that took care of house chores with his image plastered on the front. And the Professor was actually the good, responsible parent of the two.

Gaz also wrote of her nightmares about halfway through, but only noted when she had them soon after. Apparently the theme didn't vary much. By the time Zim came into the picture, it was mostly a book of those who annoyed her (much by her brother) and a record of doomings and any new games she wanted to get by any means necessary. She _really_ did not like people. Zim could not blame her.

Zim now knew that fragile center that Gaz protected at all costs. It was in her nightmares. Why she was so armored and kept everyone at bay. She had been abandoned by those she should have been able to count on the most in favor of mere scientific obsession. So she trusted no one and relied only on herself.

There were many and not very flattering comments about Zim and Dib. That angered Zim, but human perceptions were obviously inferior to Irken ones, so he didn't get too upset by that. Some were so wrong that even he found them funny. But there also were a few not-so-dark moments here and there. However, she had almost light moments on occasions and they correlated with when Zim slipped something into her locker at school or got one over on Dib real good.

Yet toward the end things had almost started to turn brighter. Zim had to look really, really hard but it was there, invisibly upbeat. About the same time she had partnered with Zim for the CWZ competition.

Then Zim read the next entry.

_I was wrong about Zim. All these years I just saw a guy who couldn't get anything right. He could mess up any task no matter how small. But I didn't know how to look at him. I saw his memories and now I see him. It's not that he constantly fails to succeed, but that he's designed to succeed at failure. Literally. He hasn't succeeded in his mission against Earth, but always succeeds in saving it from others._

_ No plan, plot, or action that is brought against him has __ever__ succeeded. And when he doesn't have other's plots to foil, he messes up his own. Because that's what he's meant to do pure and simple. Get in and mess stuff up. Wreck things. He's a natural saboteur and he's brilliant at it without even trying or being aware of it._

_ I'm sorry Zim for all the lousy things I wrote about you. You are amazing, even though things often go haywire. Know that you are my friend. I didn't realize it until tonight. I don't know how it happened, but you're the only one I have._

And Zim had turned her away in the heat of the moment and it was Gaz-zilla who was trying to fix things.

_I know you don't agree with everything I wrote, but that's okay. I know that you are the only one you will really listen to and perhaps that is how this part should be. I've written some things down on the next page but don't read it, because one day you will discover those on your own. When that happens, remember this day, and that I haven't hidden anything from you. It is just that some things are things you need to figure out on your own. Just like I had to discover for myself how to look to truly see you. When that happens, I will be there with you._

Zim turned to the next page. It was ripped out and underneath was more writing. Zim started to laugh.

_I knew you couldn't resist, so I'm keeping it on me. Don't forget I know you now, just like you now know me. Plus you'd better give this back if you want to stay healthy. Just because you're my friend doesn't mean I won't doom you good. I'm not expecting anything, but if you still want to be partners, I'm waiting outside._

Zim slammed the book closed, jumped up off the couch and opened the front door. Sure enough there was Gaz, sitting on the curb with her feet planted on the street. She must have been sitting there for almost two hours looking into the sky, and the sun was coming up over the horizon. Zim walked up to her quickly, not happy that she was still out there. It was not really freezing, but not what one would call warm at night. But he knew her, and that she could not leave until she had finished what she came to do. Her soul demanded it.

He stood behind her, but she did not turn to face him, but looked at the sunrise. She was no longer Gaz-zilla to Zim. She needed a new address. So he reached out carefully and put a three fingered hand on her shoulder.

"Gaz-partner," he handed her the steel-plated book and sat down next to her. "You must go home and get your rest. Or do you _want_ to catch a germ sickness? It was foolish to remain outdoors."

Gaz snapped the padlock back into place on her diary and held it close. "Yeah, I know. But you understand why."

Zim nodded his head. "Yes. Zim understands."

The pair sat for another ten minutes watching the sunrise. An observer might have concluded that they were taking time together and appreciating the nature's art in the sky. But they didn't see nature's display, for they were digesting all that their opened eyes now saw in that night of awakening. A lifetime of memories was a lot to take in, even if it was an overview of the highlights.

Finally Zim had enough of indulging Gaz's foolishness. "Zim knows you. Therefore Zim knows you must go home and rest. You will take a sleep-aid if you must."

Gaz finally looked at Zim. "I _will?_ You think you can order me around now?" Her eyebrows were cocked, but there was a hint of a smile in the corner of her mouth.

"Yes. If you do not rest, you will get a germ-sickness and will not be able to return to see Zim's surprise for his Gaz-partner. Now shoo! Do not return until sufficient rest and nutrients have been achieved. You may come again at noon, but no earlier."

Gaz was now smiling as she dusted herself off and walked back home. Zim returned inside and quickly got to work. He had already been working on the setup for several nights, but he now had a couple new ideas to include. Nothing big, just a few decorative touches but would make all the difference to his partner. While Gaz hadn't gotten much sleep that night, he knew she wasn't much of a day-sleeper. The girl would be back exactly at noon.

* * *

Gaz walked up to Zim's door exactly at noon. She had managed to get a few more hours of real honest sleep in, a good breakfast (along with a mild painkiller and vitamin C tablet), and a long, relaxing bath. After the strain of last night she really needed it. But things were right with her world once again.

Her fist was raised to bang on the door when Zim opened it to let her inside. He raised a finger to his lips and led her to the elevator leading down into his base. Gaz was led further down the nearest hallway and to a nearby open doorway. This room was located below the front yard, and separate from the lower depths that housed the military components within Zim's base. She peeked in.

Inside was a raised platform. It was fairly large as it had two identical setups back-to-back. Two chairs with racked headsets were positioned in front of state-of-the-art computer systems. Each sat before over a dozen large widescreen monitors arranged to provide a one-eighty degree field of view. She stepped in and up onto the platforms for a closer examination. Each station had a keyboard, gaming mouse, flight control joystick with buttons and two hat switches for twelve keyboard commands, and a throttlemaster controller with nine more buttons on it. Between the two stations sat a master server.

It was all human technology of course, but it was complete overkill as a gaming system. More like a command center to fight a small war with.

"Zim took the liberty of recreating the virtual cockpit rigs used by the CWZ competition. It can also be used for other games and utilities. It has taken all week to gather in all the equipment and piece the components together to reach operational status. But Zim pulled it off. Gaz-partner is pleased?"

Gaz was staring. She touched her mouth with her fingers. Yep, she was drooling too. She turned to Zim, not really knowing what to say, and walked back over to him as he was still standing outside the open doorway.

She decided to go with humor. "You do realize that I'm going to practically live here from now on, right Zim?"

Zim just grinned and pushed a button next to the doorway. It closed shut and Gaz saw there was a large decal on the door. A white skull with red stylized lettering running diagonally across it.

Gaz's Gaming Den

"Yes, Zim knows his Gaz-partner very well. You may decorate it as you wish."

In a way it was Zim answering that cry that sounded in Gaz's nightmare.

_"Don't leave me."_

_ "I'm right here."_

Zim had given Gaz a part of his base. She would always have a place to go.

* * *

A/N: Many writer's have written about the Membrane's lack of a mother. This seems to be a key element of the Gaz character yet usually unexplained. Most have made this history a single traumatic event resulting in the mother's death when Gaz was about four, or that Gaz is in reality an experimental clone, thus causing her to think of herself as a copy rather than a unique human being.

I think the history as written here better explains why Gaz is Gaz simply because it's a repeating pattern in her family. There would be little she could do but protect what family moments she could have left with her father like a juggernaut (Bloaty's Pizza Hog), yet not care and distance herself at the same time (to minimize the potential for heartache) as we see in other episodes. She could see familiar patterns and know the eventual outcome, but also know there would be little she could do to change that outcome. It would take a very strong character not to be crushed by this as a child, and perhaps we see Gaz overcompensating to become impervious to her surroundings.

It is not as dramatic perhaps, but very human in an Invader Zim sort of way. One of my goals was to make this early history consistent with the IZ style portraying the Membrane household, and Gaz is my favorite character of IZ. I hope this story does her justice and works for you as readers.

Now to continue my master plan…


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Thanks again to Kaylee Or Something, Zerg170, Madiphan99 and now InfiniteReader for your reviews and encouragement. You guys help me stay focused!

The last chapter was the end of phase one, and a major turning point of "Don't Leave Me." Now we begin phase two, with another build-up cycle to another significant event.

Later in this chapter I will be writing Zim & Gaz's trip to see a suspense/terror movie, but the focus is on Zim and Gaz watching, so the references to the movie will be few and vague. I am trying to keep most of this story to a K+ rating. Phases three and four will probably be more of a T rating. Oh, and I am NOT encouraging anyone to actually do these things in a theater.

Kudos to anyone who gets the Weird Al reference!

* * *

Gaz pulled the headset away from her ears and stretched her arms and back. It was now late Sunday afternoon. She had spent nearly the entire weekend down in the new gaming den Zim had built in his base. _Her_ gaming den, she corrected herself. It was still hard to believe Zim had set all this up, and then labeled it as Gaz's. It was still Zim's base, but this room belonged to her.

Not that Zim would call her up to ask permission to enter or make equipment changes as he saw necessary. Nor did Gaz did require it of him. They were partners, a team.

Zim was sitting in the gaming station behind her running a Main Battle Tank on a desert map. With few obstacles and some care, the alien could actually drive the lumbering vehicle. He was holding a position behind an embankment that served as a defensive line, punching out plasma bursts at an approaching column of heavy armor. Zim, taking heavy fire, was about to deploy a smoke shell from a mini-mortar and pull back to the next defensive position. Gaz in another tank would provide covering fire.

In one week they would be outnumbered against experienced opponents who were the best around in the gaming community. Even though their opponents were only human dirt-beings, it would not be easy _all _the time and they needed these defensive tactics as well as their offensive ones. They would no doubt be pushed back hard at times. Gaz never let Zim's ego cause him to forget that.

The alien had his antenna pulled into his headset since he did not have any ears. Although they were in the same room and could hear each other just fine, the convention center next Saturday would have tremendous background noise. Thus the headsets. He did however notice Gaz had stopped playing. Zim paused and spun his chair to face the human.

"What is it?" he asked, wincing as several of his partner's joints popped.

"Nothing. Just feeling a little burned out. We've been grinding at this for almost a week straight, except for school, and I could use a break. Maybe do something else for a change."

"Ah, yes. Zim understands. Zim takes breaks from this game every night after you return to your human home. Works on other projects."

"Well_ I _have to sleep sometime, so I haven't exactly had the time to do much else lately."

"Yes. Your human need to sleep a full third of your day..." Zim caught himself when Gaz threw him an expression before he could say something along the lines of _weakness._ "...must be annoying."

"Yeah, nice save," Gaz retorted, not fooled for a minute. "So what do you do when you're not working? You know, for fun?"

"Zim collects and restores weapons and other tactical systems."

"No, I didn't mean for your mission. I mean as a hobby."

"That _is_ Zim's hobby."

_Of course it is,_ Gaz thought. _Invader to the core._ "Ok," Gaz responded, letting that one drop, "what have you been working on lately? You know, when I'm wasting time asleep?"

Zim shut the computers down and got up. "Come, Zim will show off his pride and joy."

He nearly ran out of the room, so Gaz had to hurry to keep up.

They took the elevator down another level and into a wide bay. Gaz stopped in her tracks and looked up at Zim's showpiece. All ten feet and twelve tons of armored vehicle. It had an opened single-pilot control pod in the front with a larger backpack portion behind it. The drive system was in the waist section below, connecting two short yet thick arms where weapons would attach and heavily built legs. The thinner reactive armor plates, ablative hull panels and chassis frame were mostly dark red and black.

Gaz couldn't help but feel a twinge of dread as she looked at the thing. It was only natural that this was Zim's pride and joy. A light armored walker. She just stood there as Zim continued speaking.

"When Zim received this Scout Walker from his Tallest, it was just an empty chassis. But Zim persevered! It took years to collect the parts online from too many galactic salvage yards to remember. It is now almost finished. Zim even managed to find the turbine package so it can make atmospheric hops! However the limb servos still need to be installed, and the weapon systems as well.

"You mean this beast is almost operational?" Gaz knew _exactly_ what a disaster zone Zim could be around any vehicle with two legs. Dangerous did not even begin to describe it.

Zim shrugged, clueless to any concern. "It will be technically functional, but it is far too obsolete to be considered _operational._ It has no stealth system, and still has magnetically driven projectile guns instead of proper energy emitters!" He pointed to some crates waiting in the corner with almost scorn. "It took Zim over two years to find just one!"

Gaz examined Zim very carefully, but discreetly. As she did so, her sense of dread lessened. Oh, Zim having one of these things still made her a _little_ nervous, but the look on his face and the way he talked calmed her. Zim did not see this as a tool, or even as a vehicle. He looked at it as one of those 'classic' cars middle-aged human males restored to mint condition and then parked forever under a tarp in their garage. It was a collector's item to Zim. Not something to be used in action.

Of course Zim was acting like _everybody_ had a walking tank in their private collection. Maybe on his homeworld everyone did.

"Looks like its missing something," Gaz looked around. "What do you paint it with?"

Zim pointed to a marking device on a shelf. She went over and picked it up. "May I?"

The alien nodded, and Gaz moved over to the armored hulk of a machine with a stepladder. She climbed up to the level of the cockpit along it's side and began making small twists and turns of her wrist. After a few minutes she stepped back down and let Zim examine her handiwork.

Now along the lower side of the cockpit was a cartoon tornado holding a smoking missile launcher held casually over its shoulder with the word _"Whirlwind"_ scripted underneath.

Zim stepped back down. He was smiling. "Zim likes. Zim likes very much."

Gaz actually felt better too, as if that simple marking made all the difference between a prized personal possession, and a standardized piece of military equipment. Or that bearing her mark somehow made it less menacing to herself. Perhaps it truly did. Zim would always see that caricature and remember his partner.

She turned to walk out of the fabrication bay putting it all behind her. "Come on Zim, let's get out of here. How about we go unwind and see a movie?"

* * *

They walked back to the Membrane house for Gaz's Jeep, and to leave her brother a note saying where they had gone. It was annoying to let Dib know where she was going, but not as aggravating as having him trying to track her down if her brother realized the two of them were no longer at Zim's base and he didn't know where they were. More specifically where Zim was.

Next they stopped at a bakery so the now disguised alien could pick up some triple-glazed sugar donuts to sneak into the theater within his PAK. When they arrived they paid for their tickets and Gaz got her own snacks at the counter. A tub of popcorn and an ultra-gulp sized soda.

As they took their seats Zim turned to his partner. "So tell Zim about this 'movie.'" He began munching on his snacks. The film hadn't even started yet and he was chowing down.

"Oh, its awful," Gaz replied. "Probably one of the worst films ever made."

"Then why would you take Zim to see such inferiority? Considering Earth standards are so low to begin with, it must truly be abysmal. You think such a thing would entertain the amazing _ZIM_?"

Gaz just smirked at her friend. "Just watch the movie, Zim." She began slurping her soda.

The lights darkened and the awful movie started. It was supposed to be a suspense flick. A troop of unsupervised Eagle Scout teenagers hiking in the deep dark and eerie forest found an equally dark, eerie, rundown and seemingly abandoned cabin that happened to be in the same area where a deranged psychopath disappeared that morning. Naturally they decided it would make an excellent camping spot for the weekend. Apparently the bright and sunny meadow with the blue jays and butterflies was too good for them.

After the first camper disappeared into the basement of doom, the group sent another to go look for him with only a tiny birthday candle to pierce the thick gloom of the basement. After all, a flashlight was far more valuable than their chum. Zim was laughing at their human stupidity.

He leaned over and told Gaz he would have illuminated the basement with a flamethrower. She countered with welding the door shut and spending the next few days calmly commenting on how refreshing the mountain spring water was as the psychopath was tormented by his own thirst. Zim countered back with blasting the entire cabin with a fusion cannon. Evacuating the brainless Scouts first was optional. Gaz responded with dropping a large wrecking ball on the cabin and sealing the wreckage with concrete. She eventually won the game with the suggestion of chaining the psycho down and forcing him to watch this movie for all eternity.

During one supposedly suspenseful scene the person in the row ahead of them screamed and Gaz looked over. Zim was retracting one of his PAK's spider limbs from under the seat ahead of him. He had grabbed an unsuspecting ankle at just the right moment. Gaz had to cover her mouth very hard to contain her laughter. Then they began placing bets with popcorn on which doomed moron would be the next to go into the basement of no return.

One result of the bet got to eat the popcorn. The other one got to throw it at the screen. It was difficult to tell who was the loser of that game as it seemed too much of a win-win.

After the terrible movie ended, Gaz drove Zim back to his place and dropped him off. She still had a faint smile on her face. "Thanks, Zim. I really needed that," she said as Zim climbed out.

"Yes, it was very entertaining, despite its awfulness. You must bring Zim along on your next unwinding. See you at school tomorrow?"

"Absolutely," was the reply as she drove off back to her house.

* * *

Dib turned from compiling his reports on the jackalope for the Swollen Eyeball Network as Gaz walked in the front door. "Hey, Sis. How was the movie?"

She walked through the living room toward the kitchen to start something for dinner. "It was hilarious."

_Hilarious?_ "I thought you took Zim to see 'Nature Trail to Hell?'"

Dib got up and poked his head into the kitchen to see Gaz banging pots around. "I did," was her only response.

"And you found it to be funny? I thought it was a terror flick."

Gaz looked at him with a definite smirk. "Oh, it's an absolute _riot_ if you go with the right person." She turned to collect the beans and instant potatoes.

Dib left to get back to his own activity. His sister had a very strange way of looking at things sometimes. But Gaz was back home and safe. And judging by that nearly undetectable spring in her step she was also very content with her day.

* * *

The next morning at school Zim opened his locker and found a movie stub slipped in at the bottom. _Thanks for coming. Would have been nauseating if you weren't there. -Gaz._

Gaz opened her own locker and spied it's twin ticket lying inside. _That was indeed a terrible movie. You must take Zim to see more. -Zim._


	9. Chapter 9

"No, Zim. Absolutely not. No, no, no." Gaz was scrolling through her options as Zim had laid out for her on the main computer screen in his lab. Gir was sleeping in his dog outfit down by their feet. It was now Thursday, final night of preparation. Friday would be a day off so they would be fresh for the weekend.

For two days after school they would practically lock themselves in Gaz's Gaming Den under Zim's base and try to work out disaster scenarios they may face in the upcoming competition. There weren't many, but one was doosy.

The first problem was that they would always be outnumbered. That wasn't so much of a problem. While it would increase the amount of fire they would take, it also provided them with more targets of opportunity. The biggest one was not so much in the game environment itself, but the social nature of the humans outside the game. They called it the grapevine, water-cooler gossip, and many other names.

Once one opposing team faced Zim riding full tilt in the Armored Assault Walker, word would spread rapidly that _somebody_ at the convention was really, really, unnaturally good in that particular vehicle. Unbelievably good. If that person got in the walker, it was pretty much game over for the other side kind of good. The top teams would be watching for it eventually, and it was those teams that they would be facing in the finals. It would not take them long to figure out who was the juggernaut in the walker during the final stages of competition, and when they did there was a very simple strategy to negate that overwhelming advantage.

Get one of their people in it first just to keep Zim out, because there was only one walker on any map.

Urban environments was Zim's strength, with thick jungles being Gaz's. Forest Villages was somewhere in between the two of them. However, desert was their weak point with little cover or concealment. It was usually considered a dedicated heavy armor/air support map. Without the walker to compensate for their fewer numbers in open terrain, they could have enormous trouble in that environment.

For two afternoons they had worked to find a solution, but neither Zim nor Gaz was happy about what they had come up with. The first was hope it wouldn't happen. Like Zim and Gaz were real big on _that._ The second was if presented with that scenario, wage a strictly defensive campaign using infantry engineer kits to lay thick anti-tank minefields then switch to rocket infantry and drive their own tanks into dug in positions to cover the approaches.

Neither of them liked it, but it was the best they could come up with for that specific situation. While the semi-finals were best 2 out of 3 rounds, and finals best 3 out of 5, it was not in their nature to accept any loss. Although losing a single round would not be devastating, Gaz played to win at all times. Zim lived for it. And both were notoriously sore losers. But there was little more they could do than devise basic contingency plans without actually facing their opponents in the game.

The other option that they would probably go for was more of a general strategy to the whole competition. Zim would simply not completely cut loose unless it was absolutely necessary. Gaz would have to help keep him in check most of the time. After all, Zim _did_ get "carried away" on his own homeworld once before!

So now Zim and Gaz were going over other preparations. One was installing a second seat in the Voot cruiser. Zim would take care of that later. Tomorrow evening they would catch back up in their schoolwork, then each of them would prepare their own meals for the entire weekend so they wouldn't have to spend more energy cooking after their return commute. They would burn up most of that energy in the competition and would need to rest and relax between days. Right now they were examining Gaz's "costume," making use of Zim's disguise program.

"Nope. Notta. No way. Forget it," Gaz was flipping through designs on the monitor Zim had come up with very rapidly.

"Gaz-partner! You're not even looking at them!"

"They're all bald!"

"Of course they are. Irkens don't have hair."

"For the last time, I'm NOT shaving my head!"

"But it's _authentic."_

Gaz just looked at Zim. "It doesn't _have_ to be totally authentic. I'm not infiltrating Irk or anything. So compromise a little."

Zim glared at her in turn. "There is already compromise. I'm letting you keep your nose and ears! It's not like I'm modifying your DNA to be Irken...although..."

"Compromise more, Zim," Gaz advised forcefully. "I'm letting you glue antennae to my head and dye my skin Irken green for two whole days."

Zim clicked away on the computer controls. "Fine," he grumbled. "You may also keep your hair."

"Thank-you," Gaz replied sarcastically. The disguises shown before her suddenly had hair very much like her own. Zim had taken a picture of her and fed it into the program, which had now superimposed features on it. Styles of clothing and pairs of antenna cycled by. "I'm only doing this for you, Zim, so _you_ don't have to wear one at all! Besides it's not like your disguise is all that elaborate anyway. Its just contacts and a wig!"

"You suggested it to annoy the Dib-stink. And ZIM's disguise is AMAZING! It has fooled humans for years!"

Gaz just let it drop. She didn't really want to burst Zim's ego bubble. She didn't want him to be devastated if it eventually collapsed. And deep down she honestly had begun to believe that he deserved better than how his own species had treated him.

"Zim wishes for your disguise to be perfect." _Aw, that's sweet of him._ "For it reflects the work of ZIM!" _Okay, maybe not._

Yeah. Way, way, _way_ deep down she believed he deserved better. WAY down there.

Gaz finally selected a set of antennae that had a little curl to them, yet not screaming feminine. That just wasn't her. Besides, single girl gamers tended to be hunted to extinction. She didn't want to have to exterminate several someones who didn't know better than to just leave her alone. That resulted in disqualification.

_Then again I do have Zim around to help clean up... No, we've worked too hard for this. Better not chance it._

She'd just have Zim or her brass knuckles encourage others to leave her be if necessary. The implication of impending doom was such an amazing motivator.

Zim gave out an exaggerated sigh of relief as she finally chose her antennae. Gaz smacked him lightly upside the back of his head. "What was that for?" he complained.

"You're the one making such a big fuss about getting this perfect. So stop grimacing over how long this is taking."

"Then stop being so picky," Zim fired right back.

"Fine. Let's go with powered body armor."

Zim flicked through the list. "I don't see that one here."

"Exactly. You forgot all the cool ones. Bounty Hunter, Powered Infantry, Intrepid Cruiser Captain…" Gaz expressed with more sarcasm.

Zim reached over and smacked _her_ lightly upside the back of her head. "Did you just…" Gaz stammered as she stared at Zim.

The alien took off running. Gaz chased him around the base for nearly five minutes. He was fast, nimble, and his spider limbs let him climb along the ceiling. She was just plain determined. Then she saw his face as he made a sharp turn. Zim was smiling just a little. That made her notice she was feeling something on_ her _face. The beginnings of a smile of her own.

_When did bickering turn into egging each other on?_ she thought to herself, realizing it had turned into an almost game between them. Gaz couldn't remember when it had first started.

Zim on the other hand was just enjoying being able to set Gaz up like that at the last minute. It was not an easy thing to accomplish as she was very astute for a human. It was so worth being chased around his own base as if he were a helpless worm-baby. He halted only after Gaz stopped trying to run him down and was breathing heavily. She chuckled.

"Okay Zim, let's just go with the standard Invader clothes and call it even."

"Victory for ZIM!" he crowed.

Gaz turned to head for the elevator. "Gir!" she called. The robot, still in his dog disguise, lifted his head up from sleeping under the computer station they had been working at. "Zim had taco's hidden under his shirt!"

"TACOOO'S!" Gir plowed into a horrified Zim, trying to dig his hyperactive way under Zim's shirt.

The girl walked into the elevator without a second thought. While Zim wouldn't come to any actual lasting harm, it would take at least an hour or two before Gir realized there were no tacos. Then Zim would have to go out and buy some for the robot before the begging and singing would stop. Zim _really_ hated the taco song. Then there would be the spraying flecks of meat bits along with other assorted food debris.

As she left, Gaz put her hand to her pocket and realized she had forgotten to bring her transponder collar again. She had walked off with it one night and kept forgetting to return it. She'd have do better about remembering. While the base computer now recognized her, the Voot cruiser on Saturday's flight would not. It was an entirely separate security system.

She put it out of her mind when she thought about what the alien was going through down below. Zim may be her friend, but that didn't mean he could have the last word. After all, Gaz was still Gaz. She smiled at this thought as she left the base.

Zim on the other hand was thinking something else. _Ha! It was still worth it_.

* * *

It was now Friday night and Dib and Gaz were once again sitting in the Membrane living room watching TV. They had not done this for nearly two weeks. Gaz was, as usual, playing on her GameSlave 4. She was running one of her classics, Vampire Piggy Slayer for old times sake as she wanted to be fresh for CWZ tomorrow morning. The GameSlave beeped, indicating an incoming message so she paused and opened the waiting text.

_Zim: Are your preparations complete, Gaz-partner?_

Gaz switched to the on-screen keyboard and began tapping buttons. _Gaz: Yes. Breakfast and dinner for both days are in the freezer. Will buy lunch at the convention. My old GS3 is packed in my bag. How about you?_

_ Zim: A suitable supply of snacks and GS3 are stowed in the back of the Voot cruiser. Modifications are also complete. Did I mention we're bringing Gir?_

_ Gaz: NO! Just no, Zim._

_ Zim: Do you really expect me to leave him here unsupervised? He might burn down the house to roast marshmallows. Or someone else's. It's not like Gir will be hanging around with us. I'm sure he'll find plenty of dance parties to attend while we are busy._

_ Gaz: Parties?_

_ Zim: Yes. It seems he gets invited to something called a rave twice a week._

Gaz didn't want to know how or why a "dog" could be invited to a rave without anyone noticing anything out of the ordinary. _Gaz: Fine. Just make sure he doesn't cause us any trouble. Or hangs around us._

_ Zim: Is there anything you are forgetting? If not we can apply your disguise now._

Gaz did feel like she was forgetting something. There was a feint itch in the back of her mind, but she couldn't come up with anything. _Gaz: Can't think of anything. Thought we'd do the costume in the morning._

_ Zim: Foolishness! We must be ready to go first thing in the morning. Suppose the machine requires adjustment or does not respond immediately? The convention parking lot opens at 8:30am and our flight time will be thirty minutes. Also we must be early enough to avoid crowds seeing the cruiser landing._

_ Gaz: All right, fine. I'll be over there in a few minutes. See you then._

She powered down the GameSlave and turned to her brother seated next to her. "I have to stop over at Zim's to pick up my costume. I'll be right back."

"Okay, Gaz. Hurry back. It's already kind of late," Dib replied.

With Zim busy with Gaz, he was almost relaxed in a sort of stay-at-home vacation from the alien. That didn't mean he didn't worry at all. But Zim had been behaving himself for two whole weeks, a new all-time record and Dib had to admit to himself that he could do with a little time away from that stress. Besides, he was now starting to accept that his baby sister Gaz could and would do more to Zim if he stepped out of line than he ever could. But it wasn't easy. Dib was her big brother after all.

* * *

Gaz stepped with Zim out of the elevator and into the small room with the disguise machine. It was just split halves of a pod held up to the ceiling by two robotic arms. Zim gave her instructions.

"The machine is already set up. All you will have to do is push this button," he said indicating the so-big-you'd-have-to-be-blind-to-miss-it start button. "Then stand here in this circle marked on the floor. Your uniform is on the rack next to the machine. Once you are finished push that button to open the door. I will be waiting outside." Zim turned to leave.

"Wait a minute. Where are you going?" Gaz asked. She wasn't exactly familiar with the device.

"Out into the corridor. I don't think you want me in here," was his response.

"And why not?" she asked.

Zim looked really nervous and looked down at the floor scratching the back of his head. "Umm. The machine is going to dye your skin." Gaz just looked at him blankly. "_All_ your skin."

"Right." It was now Gaz's turn to be nervous, her face blushing. Now she understood. "Then get out. Now."

Zim made his way out the room. "By the way, it may sting. Computer, engage privacy mode, this room! Do not cancel until Gaz-partner opens this door." With that the doors closed behind him and Gaz was alone in the room.

"Computer, you there?" she called out. Gaz just wanted to be sure. Only silence answered. "What did he mean by sting?" she muttered to herself.

Sighing, Gaz walked over to the clothing rack where her new costume hung and placed her boots next to it and draped her clothes over the top. She tip-toed on her bare feet over to the big button on the large machine and pushed it. Gaz then took a deep breath and placed herself over the indicated position marked on the floor.

The two halves of the disguise pod came down, encasing her within. A white light seemed to shine from everywhere around her. _This _may_ sting?_ Gaz nearly yelled mentally to herself as she gritted her teeth. She stung everywhere. _Understatement of the week! Zim will pay._

However this only lasted five seconds, and Gaz only had time to finish the thoughts before the pod split back open and was lifted up into it's standby position. Gaz shook herself free of the brief memory of the sensation she had just experienced and blinked heavily over the new contact lenses. The now completely green skinned girl put on her new outfit with the accompanying black gloves and small uniform boots, along with putting her precious skull necklace back into its proper place around her neck. It was very much like Zim's everyday outfit, but without a PAK and wearing the necklace.

Well, it certainly _felt_ different than what she was used to. At least Zim had remembered to include some pockets in the pants. Gaz rubbed her green hand through her hair and abruptly stopped when she felt something else up there. She had completely forgotten about the antennae. The girl gave a careful tug. _Ow!_ Yep, they were rooted to her scalp all right.

Gaz walked over to the door carrying her everyday black dress, striped tights and steel-toed boots. She pressed the button for the release mechanism. Zim was standing by the door waiting, and he turned toward the now green girl in the Irken outfit.

"Invader Gaz!" he breathed, his body stiffening in an "at attention" pose.

It was a purely automatic reflex, seeing a close-to-Irken form in an Invader uniform that was slightly taller than he was. _At least Zim didn't salute the Gaz-partner,_ the alien rationalized to himself. That was easy enough to understand given all the military indoctrination that had been drilled into him during his Invader training. At least that's what he told himself.

Zim slowly examined Gaz starting from her feet all the way up to her very realistically quivering antennae. Another thought occurred to Zim. Had Gaz been Irken she could have actually been, not just a real invader, but one of the greats. Perhaps a squadron commander or a even full general. There was no doubt in Zim's mind about that. It was not a comfortable thought for the alien programmed to be xenophobic and to see all other lifeforms as inferior.

Zim nearly stuttered as he attempted to recover from the sight. "Gaz-partner, you look...look..."

"What?" Gaz almost glared, trying to check herself for what may have gone wrong. With Zim around it was understandably a safe bet.

"You look...amazing," Zim sputtered. Now he'd really done it. The Invader sent to conquer Earth had just openly acknowledged a human female as not inferior. Very, very, very not inferior. What was worse was that he actually meant it. In fact Zim had to catch himself before saying something _really_ embarrassing.

He had almost called her _beautiful._ Her now fully amber eyes, human ears, nose, and the antennae sticking out of her trademark purple hair did not make her hideous. No, not at all. Zim had eventually gotten somewhat used to the human features, not that he found them pleasant by any means, but this combination was more like _exotic._ Zim brutally pushed these thoughts away and composed himself. It wasn't that Gaz's features had changed all that much. Just contact lenses, dyed green skin with some antennae stuck to her scalp and given an Irken uniform. Other than that she still looked mostly human.

But it definitely was enough to finally crack something in Zim's xenophobicaly blinded perception. In fact it had been subtly changing over many years without his awareness. When he first arrived on Earth, Gaz had been just another stink-human worm-baby. A dirt-being. Then it gravitated to just stink-human. Then Dib-sister, human, beast, agent of doom, and finally partner. The one person he knew better than any other being in the universe.

Zim realized he truly respected this now undeniably remarkable human and had in some form or another for many years. For when he looked at Gaz, he no longer saw a dirt-being, doom-beast, stink-human, or even a human. Because now when he looked at Gaz, he saw Gaz herself.

Gaz of course knew none of these extremely uncomfortable things going on in Zim's brain. But being called amazing did make her blush. After all, she had never really done anything with makeup before, or was ever too concerned about her everyday appearance beyond the dark intimidation factor she expertly wore. She hadn't wanted attention, she had wanted a shield of dread.

"Thank you, Zim," she said in return. In the back of her mind Gaz realized it was in fact pleasing to recieve such a complement from Zim. Especially since a compliment for anyone or anything other than himself was incredibly rare, and usually through gritted teeth. But Zim had actually and truthfully meant what he had let slip. "I should head home and turn in. We have to get up real early tomorrow. You nervous?"

"Nervous?" Zim's eyes grew in size. "What do I have to be nervous about? Nope, no nerves here."

"Yeah, mine either. But I probably will be when we reach the convention center. Good night, Zim."

With that Gaz returned home.

After she left, Zim wandered through the base to his hammock where he occasionally slept. As he laid himself down he gave one last command for the night.

"Computer, begin Zim's maintenance cycle. Set wake up time for 5:00am."

Two cables snaked out of the wall and plugged into Zim's PAK, and the alien closed his red eyes. Zim _had _been busy lately and had cut short several cycles these past two weeks. He obviously needed an extra long maintenance period tonight.

* * *

Gaz opened her front door slowly. "Hey Dib, I'm back. Try not to freak out, okay?" She waited before opening it all the way.

"Why?" he called over his shoulder from the couch. "What did Zim do this time?" He turned to look at the door.

Gaz flung it open, jumped into the living room a few steps with arms out wide. "Ta-da!" she exclaimed.

It was totally worth it seeing Dib slide off of the couch with giant eyes bulging out of his head. Gaz began laughing softly to herself.

"Ho crap!" was Dib's only response. He was still staring.

She turned to look at herself in a mirror. There were no mirrors at Zim's base. So it was almost a shock to finally see her new image. Her green skin and solid amber eyes. Especially those antennae. They were _quivering._ Dib came up to stand next to her.

She chuckled lightly. "Wow, Zim did a great job. Never thought I'd admit that." Her brother was still staring.

"Relax, Dib. I can remove the contacts and the dye will wash out in a couple of days." Gaz turned to her brother in the mirror. "You should have seen Zim's expression when he first saw me. He came to attention like I was an officer on an inspection tour. But _your_ reaction was even better!"

She turned and headed upstairs. "Well, good night. Don't let my security bots bite!" Gaz sang the twisted nursery rhyme to her still speechless brother.

Dib just continued to stare with mouth open. When she had mentioned a costume, he certainly hadn't imagined this!


	10. CWZ Reference Guide

A/N: Throughout the story so far I have included some information about components within the Combat WarZone video game and what may be faced in the upcoming convention. I've decided to compile a description and glossary here so as not to disrupt the storyline too much with definitions and explanations that some readers may require. This is CWZ reference material only AND NOT A STORY CHAPTER. I may add more to this in further updates.

Please remember that this is all within a non-graphic "mild-T rated" video game, and the next chapter still qualifies as a K+ rating according to the definitions provided.

ALSO: Due to the interest, I am also putting in the modified rules for _Monopoly: Juvenile Delinquent Edition. _Yes, I really did make this up way back in High School. And yes, it is playable. These are at the end of this Reference Guide. As the name suggests, it is not a 'sane' version so please don't flame me about it.

* * *

_**Combat: Warzone**_

AAm: anti-aircraft missile

Area-effect or Area-Of-Effect: This is in reference to a weapon that damages everything within a certain radius of its impact. Fusion grenades, proximity mines, mortars, fragmentation and nuclear-tipped rockets all fall into the category of area-effect weapons.

ATm: No, it does not give you money. It's an anti-tank missile. It does... something else. (AT=Anti-Tank)

AW: (Armored) Assault Walker

APC: Armored Personnel Carrier

CAP: Combat Air Patrol. Aircraft on CAP will circle an area around a key asset or territory and engage any hostiles approaching that area.

Demolition Charges: New in CWZ II. A package of high explosives remotely detonated from a distance. Unlike most other explosive elements, these are easily seen due to the flashing warning lights. Unless of course you are on the wrong side of the object it is attached to. Used to clear (or create) obstacles rather than engage opposing forces directly.

Dumbfire: This is launching a guided missile without waiting for the targeting system to lock in a firing solution, thus causing it to behave as an unguided rocket. Unguided ordinance may also be referred to as dumbfires.

GEV: Ground Effect Vehicle. Any vehicle that hovers over the ground by a few inches by manipulating gravitational fields.

HUD: Heads-Up-Display

IFF: Identify Friend or Foe. One of the collars Zim gave to Gaz for use as a signal transponder is an example of an IFF system. Of course that is not what the collars actually are.

I.F.: Indirect Fire. This includes mortars and fragmentation rockets fired up and over obstacles. Always area effect.

LOS or Line-Of-Sight: usually a reference to weapons that require a unobstructed direct line straight to the intended target. These include all projectile and energy weapons as well as missiles that home in on a target such as aircraft or vehicles.

MBT: Main Battle Tank. Comes in two types, Gun and Rocket Tanks

Navigational Compass Headings from 0 to 359 degrees: Zero is north, 090 is east, 180 is south, 270 is west.

NPC: Non-Player (or Playable) Character. Controlled by the game program and nor a serious threat for a team of players.

PPG: No, not Powerpuff Girl. Phased Plasma Gun. Definitely NOT made of sugar and spice and everything nice. An energy weapon mounted on only the sturdiest vehicles such as tanks. It projects a burst of energized ultra-hot plasma to melt through armor plates.

Powered Armor: Infantry body armor using bio-feedback servomechanisms within the joints to amplify both speed and strength. The suits are very heavy, yet allows the user to move faster and carry heavier equipment. Fully encases the character except for the faceplate.

RAG: Rapid Attack Group. A fast group of the lightest scout vehicles usually used to get behind enemy lines and disrupt operations and retreating back to their own positions before they get pinned down by superior firepower. Essentially a cavalry squad.

Respawn: After a unit in the game is "killed" it will reappear after a set time back at a starting point on the map. Usually the main base for that side. If you've ever played a video game then you probably already know this.

Sitrep: Short for Situation Report

Spawn Camp: This is when a superior force sits on top of an opponent's spawn area and immediately targets enemies as they spawn in before they can reach their own vehicles. Everyone agrees it is completely unfair, underhanded and unacceptable, but no one hesitates to use this tactic if given the chance.

VTOL: Vertical Take Off and Landing. New in CWZ II. System enables jet aircraft to hover, slide sideways and even reverse to some extent. Drawback is the fuel consumption rate, but not really a huge issue in a video game. Thrust is directed through several vents and swiveling ducts along the main body and wingtips of the aircraft.

Walker: Any combat vehicle who's main method of travel is walking on two or more mechanical legs.

* * *

All projectile weapons of CWZ use magnetic accelerators to fire steel coated tungsten penetrators. CWZ vehicles are equipped with heavier versions and come in two main systems. The automatic rail gun fires a stream of projectiles through a single barrel, has a much slower rate of fire, but is more accurate and manages its ammunition supply better. The Gauss autocannon is an insane ammo hog that fires up to 50 rounds per second through rotating multiple barrels. However accuracy is the tradeoff for the rate of fire. The high speed rotation both simplifies the loading mechanism and allows air-cooling for the accelerator coils within the barrels. Zim has acquired an advanced version of the Gauss autocannon in his restoration project of his Scout Walker, a weapon system which is considered an advanced next generation projectile weapon on Earth but hopelessly obsolete by Irken standards.

Basic infantry gear within CWZ is standard or powered body armor, primary and secondary weapons. The primary weapon is usually part of the description of the equipment rig such as rocket infantry. Secondary weapons include mini-fusion grenades, proximity mines, and a few small shoulder fired anti-air or anti-tank rockets of various types as basic gear (except for rocket infantry for as they have much heavier versions).

* * *

Light Infantry:

Sniper: Armor has much more camouflage, rather than protective, qualities than any other unit in CWZ. Essentially this means that an opponent must be much closer before an IFF tag identifying the player will pop up on their display as well as being more difficult to spot visually. Friendly units do not have this difficulty. One of the fastest infantry units, but light on health points. Its primary weapon is of course a powerful, long-range, semi-auto sniper rifle. A single shot will take down most light and even heavy infantry depending on where they are hit from 600 yards away. Often used as a recon unit to scope out enemy positions and relay that information to friendly units.

Engineer: This is a must have driver of any armor column as it can repair vehicle damages back to half strength. Enough so the damaged unit can make it back to its base for full repairs. It can also lay or clear anti-tank mines. Equipped with an automatic infantry rifle.

Rifle Infantry: Your standard infantry unit. Automatic rifle with an effective range of up to 200 yards but usual engagement ranges are around 50 or less. Medium powered armor. Fairly basic. The opposite of the Rocket Infantry.

Heavy Infantry:

Rocket Infantry: This rig is equipped with heavier powered armor and a much larger rocket launcher than standard rifle infantry units. Equipped with a large number of various shoulder fired missiles. Useful against armored vehicles and aircraft, but not so much against infantry. Thus usually escorted by friendly units.

Heavy Infantry: (Yeah, I know.) Slow moving, but very tough and equipped with an ultralight version of the Gauss autocannon. Horrifying at close range, but lacking accuracy from farther away. Of course with such a high rate of fire, who needs accuracy? Perfect for he maniac type. An assault unit for taking fortified positions. Often must retreat for more ammunition. Has the highest health points of any infantry unit.

* * *

CWZ Vehicles:

All vehicles within CWZ are GEV's and may carry a driver and a gunner, but usually run by a single player operating both functions. Most of the time the two-player method is used to pick up a teammate who was forced to bailout of their vehicle and run them back to base for another. Or just enough for to run back safely. After all, most players have better things to do than play taxi. Vehicles may become flipped over and are labeled as disabled. They disappear only after one side is left remaining in the area and respawn back at their base.

Scout GEV: A fast, maneuverable but light GEV roughly equivalent to a Jeep. Has a single automatic rail gun mounted on the roof. Used most often as transportation to ambush positions, searching out opposing forces, and for rapid attack groups.

Armored Personnel Carrier: This is a unique unit as it can carry up to six players, but is absolutely never used that way. Slower than Scouts, but faster than Tanks and equipped with a medium Gauss autocannon in a roof turret. This can be devastating to any infantry caught in the open, scout cars, effective against aircraft and can wear down tanks although slowly. Two mortar tubes in a hatched mini-turret in the back can launch I.F. fragmentation rounds effective against infantry and stationary scout cars but useless against anything else. Mostly used to escort tanks against infantry and aircraft as a support unit.

Main Battle Tank: These are the main armor force in CWZ. Tough and carrying a lot of firepower, but the slowest vehicle and least maneuverable. The primary weapon is a turreted phased plasma gun. The PPG is a purely an anti-armor system and ineffective against infantry unless they should take a direct hit. Has a 300 yard maximum range as the damage potential drops over distance. The MBT comes in two types. The Gun Tank is equipped with two light autocannon located on top of the PPG turret and is sort of an "escort" tank, but fairly common. The autocannon are effective against infantry but not heavy enough for aircraft or armored vehicles. Then there is the Missile Tank which has unguided rocket pods located along the side of the turret. This is more of an assault unit as it can fire missiles on to infantry positions like a mortar, but from three times the range. However it must be at a complete stop to compute an I.F. launch calculation. Or it can fire, while moving, line-of-sight straight into a target. The drawback is that the pods can carry only a total of eight missiles with no tracking system to guarantee a hit. It is designed for stand-and-shoot tank duels beyond PPG range or to soften up a position before going in.

Aircraft of CWZ I: These are fairly basic, and considered difficult to use effectively. Easy to take off, difficult to line up on a single ground target, and impossible to land. Most players just bail out over their base when finished. Equipped with a single heavy Gauss autocannon and two missile pods for fire support. Can also be flown upside-down and used as an eye in the sky for friendly units. They are not seen as a primary component of the game.

Aircraft of CWZ II: The vehicles and the game interface have been improved to balance the air support aspect of the game. Aircraft may include VTOL Fighters, Transports for NPC Paratroopers, and Ground Attack Bombers. The Fighters carry both AA and AT homing missiles as well as the original two unguided rocket pods and heavy autocannon. Bombers carry, well, bombs as well as heavy fragmentation rockets and as homing ATm's. Cruise Missiles for assaulting base defenses may also be carried. It's drawback is a lack of a cannon which usually requires an escort Fighter, but which is made up for by flares to draw off missile attacks.

Armored Assault Walker: This has been covered extensively in chapter 5. There is only one per map located in the middle between opposing bases. It has defenses against any unit in the game, including incoming missile fire. However, as its parts become damaged, they eventually become disabled. This includes the both the arm weapon mounts, the backpack missile system and the leg propulsion units. It is also equipped with homing anti-air, anti-tank, and unguided fragmentation missiles. Also the only unit armed with two nuclear-tipped unguided missiles. These are defined as "low-yield" tactical warheads with "only" a blast radius of 600 yards, but still devastating to a group in most environments. Anything less than an APC and Heavy Infantry (hiding behind a large rock on the outer edge of the blast radius) is simply toast. Damage increases to 100% even for tanks approaching ground-zero of the detonation. Even the Walker will take heavy damage if it is too close. Always used as a last-ditch effort against a critical position being overwhelmed due to the extreme danger of friendly fire to one's own team. But then again, that's the _normal_ way to play...

* * *

_**Monopoly: Juvenile Delinquent Edition:**_

This version can either take forever, or end really fast due to the fact that anyone can rob the bank as well as rob and perform drive-bys on other players to try and force them out of the game. Plus there are opportunities to land in jail. Many, many, many such opportunities. It all depends on the roll of the dice. Keep in mind that it's good to have friends in this more "competitive" version of Monopoly. Feel free to make up some rules yourself if you give this a try.

* * *

Setup: Just like in Normal Monopoly, but it is required that the title deeds for properties be shuffled into random order and into a single pile. You will need coins or other small objects to reflect which properties are Slumlord developments. Writing yourself some $1,000 bills in paper money is also optional.

* * *

Robbing the Bank: You know we've all wanted to do this. When you pass Go you do NOT collect a $200 dollar salary. You are a delinquent, therefore do not have a job! You rob the bank instead. Roll one of the dice. 1-2: Go to Jail. 3-4: Roll one die to see how many 50's you stole. 5-6: Roll two dice OR attempt to steal a property. To steal a property, roll one die again. What ever the roll is, that is which one you may collect from the top of the bank's property deck. When you land on or pass FREE PARKING you may choose to do this again, but may NOT roll two dice for the payout or steal a property from the bank.

Slumlord Housing: When building houses, you may choose to build Slumlord housing. You CANNOT mix regular and slum housing on a single property, but you may upgrade to regular buildings later on simply by paying the bank the rest of the building cost. Slum housing costs only half of a normal house. The downside is that you may only charge half the rent, may not build a hotel until upgraded, and the buildings are a fire hazard. They have a chance during an arson attack of spreading the fire and may even take out the whole block!

Arson Attacks: When a player lands on a rival's property with housing, they may commit arson to lower the rent rate, retaliate for some action, or just to say hello. Roll one die. 1-3: Go to jail after paying the rent to the player. 4-5: FIRE! Lose a house. 6: If a slum, the fire spreads. Roll again to see how many houses are lost. If rolls _another _5-6: The owner collects insurance money for the FULL cost of a normal house for that space. _NOTE:_ A player may use this against _themselves_ to collect the insurance money on any house or hotel! Roll a die. 1-3: Go to jail. 4-6: Lose one building and collect the insurance for the FULL cost of the house.

When passing another player, you may conduct one of two attacks. You may rob their private residence (using Rob the bank rules) or do a drive-by. (And yes, if you manage to steal a property with houses on it, you get those too!)

Drive-bys: You may choose to do this when passing another one other player's token. When your movement is complete (and before anything else is done such as paying rent), roll one of the dice. 1-2: Go to jail. 3-4: You missed and nothing happens (unless the other player has a good memory). 5-6: Success. Roll again. 1-5: They go to FREE PARKING (the hospital) and lose this many turns of movement (NO drive-bys in FREE PARKING, JAIL, or GO! 6: (optional) Roll again. If you roll another 6 they are out of the game and everything they had goes back to the bank.

Going to Jail: There is no bailing yourself out for players like you! You have to try to roll doubles once per the next three turns and pay the $50 fine, or attempt to escape. The escape attempt roll goes first. And REMEMBER! The roll for doubles is _per_ jail sentence. Trying to escape has certain risks (or advantages if you are outnumbered by enemies)

Escaping from Jail: When it is again your turn, roll a die. 1-2: You are caught and another three turns are added to your sentence (you may want a pen and paper to keep track of the jail time remaining). 3-4: Failure, but you manage to make it back to your cell and destroy the evidence before you are caught. 5-6: Get out of jail free and roll for movement.

Breaking a friend out of Jail: If you pass Jail and have a friend inside, you may attempt to bust him (or especially her) out. Roll one die. 1-3: Failure! You immediately stop the rest of your movement and turn, hiding in the bushes from the alerted guards. 4-6: Your friend is released at once without paying the fine.

Landing on Chance or Community chest (optional): You may do _any_ of the above options (or again if you already did some such as robbing the bank).

Building limits: There are none. When you are a slumlord committing robbery, arson and other such activities, are you really going to sweat over building permits? The dreaded Boardwalk Hotel may now be a building complex with a hotel and several other buildings. You will have to figure out the math yourself, but it gets really ugly really fast (Three hotels on Boardwalk? Rent=$6,000). You may need random small objects to represent houses and hotels if you go this route. You may want to write up more paper money for the game as well, such as $1,000 bills.


	11. Chapter 10

A/N: Thanks again to my reviewers who have helped keep this story going, as I find keeping focused on a project my biggest challenge. And also to my latest reviewers Kitstarr, Memmek10k, and crazyanimefreak15, thank-you for the comments and complements. Also, for Zerg170 and his hope that Gir doesn't destroy Vegas, I've decided to throw in a few tiny one-shots of Gir during the Vegas Weekend chapter(s). Those are specifically for you Zerg! Enjoy and thanks for that particular inspiration.

Also, as I have never been to such a convention myself, I'm just imagining what one could look like. Don't expect it to resemble real life if you've been to one yourself. I will be writing at times as if players are acting within the game themselves instead of their avatars. In writing this, I found it is not as easy keeping the two worlds separate as one would think. Hopefully I won't confuse anyone. Another note. I won't be naming original characters as they are just competitors and not a real part of the story. I'll just be using their team callsigns. Enjoy!

* * *

Zim awoke precisely at 5:00am Saturday morning. It was not necessary to get up at such an early hour, but the alien usually only needed an average of one to two hours of maintenance every couple of days. He had just gotten nearly seven. He got up and scrubbed himself down with his cleansing chalk after making sure Gir didn't hide bacon in it again. Going upstairs Zim ate the waffles Gir had prepared and stored in the refrigerator. He did so carefully, not so much because it was Earth food, but because he had already found a railroad spike in one. Other than that breakfast was uneventful.

However, Zim was admittedly excited about today. In fact he had completely forgotten that his original rationalization for joining Gaz was to measure up the professional soldiers of Earth that happened to be fans of CWZ. Of course it had _only_ been a rationalization, but it had lasted just two days. Although it had been a lot of work, Zim was enjoying this shared project with Gaz very much indeed. Who knew just playing a simulation of blowing stuff up with a human girl could be so much fun for an Invader such as himself?

* * *

Gaz woke up early. Well, early for her. About 6:15am. She stumbled half comatose into the bathroom and nearly jumped at the Irken girl she saw in the mirror. She rebuked herself for the momentary stupidity and just as quickly forgave herself since she _had_ gotten up at sunrise. She took her shower, which took longer since she was still a bit fascinated with her now green skin, and carefully brushed her purple hair. She didn't want to tangle those antennae in her brush. While they would not break or get torn off, they were very much attached to her scalp.

She put on her new Irken uniform and her ever present skull necklace, and made sure her keys, ID and cash were still inside. There was no need to put the contact lenses back in her eyes. These were designed to stay in until they were no longer needed, for which she was grateful. Trying to put those monster lenses in would have been unpleasant as they covered her whole eye.

The costumed human went downstairs to microwave her breakfast. A stack of pancakes with loads of syrup and orange juice. She thought she might even toss in a few sausages. Today's game play would require unremitting concentration and she would need the fuel to be at her best. But Gaz was very much looking forward to putting a whole lot of people in their place. _Doing so with Zim will be even more fun, _she thought to herself.

* * *

Gaz pulled up in her jeep and entered Zim's house after knocking a few times informally. She no longer needed to wait for Zim to answer the door for her these days. It was almost time to leave for the convention.

"Hey, Computer. Where's Zim?" she asked.

"Mistress, Zim is located upstairs with the Voot Cruiser."

"Thank you, Computer," was her reply.

Gaz actually liked the computer. While it had no interest in games, it was a descent enough player, and able to control up to ten opponents at a time. Also it always treated her with esteem and dignity, like she belonged there. Gaz laughed internally as she imagined the computer as her high-class butler. It wasn't a tremendous stretch of the imagination, and listening to the difference between when the computer spoke to Zim and herself had been entertaining during their preparations.

She stepped onto the elevator platform and rose up into the ceiling to the attic where the cruiser was prepped and waiting. A muffled robotic squeal greeted her. Zim was silently going over the preflight safety checklist of the spacecraft with Gir mumbling something very loudly to Gaz. The robot in his dog costume was laying at the undisguised alien's feet bound and gagged like a piece of luggage.

"Hey there, Gir. How you doing?" Gaz asked the crazy robot as she walked up to Zim near the cockpit.

"Mpth Vrt Ffwlp" was the happy answer. Gir was always happy when Gaz came back. Almost to the point of exploding it often seemed like.

"That's nice," Gaz replied in return. It didn't matter what the robot had said. It's expression was clear enough. "How about you Zim?"

Zim did not look back at her busy with his checklist, holding it in the air with a spider limb. "Zim is GREAT! Only one more item to check off and I can load up Gir. Then we will be ready to KICK HUMAN HINNEY!" Naturally Zim yelled the last part with both fists in the air.

Gaz chuckled to herself at Zim's antics. She had been doing that more and more often as time passed. It amazed her how just knowing Zim like she now did made him less annoying, even lightening her mood at times. She stepped up to the Voot Cruiser and an alarm sounded within the ship. Zim now turned toward her scowling, which disappeared when he saw the Irken-looking girl in the purple hair.

"You forgot your transponder again, didn't you?" the alien asked. He sighed, turning away for the elevator. Gaz just slapped her forehead. "Wait here and make sure Gir doesn't escape."

Zim returned a few minutes later and handed the green gemmed collar to Gaz, who stuffed it deep in her pocket. "You can't forget again. Zim doesn't have another one if you forget tomorrow too." He did not look happy.

"Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. Look, I'll write myself a note," Gaz said in apology. She really did feel bad about forgetting _again_. She pulled out a small notebook and stubby pencil Gaz kept on her for whenever she came across new game codes. She wrote herself a note, tore it out and hooked it though a hole to her keychain. "See? When I unlock my door tonight I'll remember. Okay?"

"Very well." Zim was not entirely convinced. "But I shall pick you up tomorrow at your house just in case."

Gaz just agreed. Even she had to admit that she deserved that bit of mild skepticism. She watched Zim pick up the bound and gagged Gir and toss him unceremoniously into the back of the Cruiser. Closing the hatch Zim looked at his partner. "Then we are ready. Shall we, Gaz-partner?"

Gaz let herself smile a fierce grin at Zim. "Oh, yes. Let's go kick human hinny."

And with that the two partners climbed into the Voot Cruiser, buckled up, and closed the canopy. The house roof split open and the spacecraft shot off into the sky.

* * *

The suborbital flight took the Voot Cruiser up nearly out of Earth's atmosphere and back down to a nearly empty Nevada Highway leading into Vegas. The ship hovered inches above the pavement as it flew along toward the city. In another ten minutes they would arrive.

Zim had decided this route would be a better one than simply landing in front of the parking area. It was more low key and would attract less attention. While he had been a bit nervous of flying his obvious spacecraft along a main highway leading into a major population center in the middle of the desert, this had been relieved as a group of humans passed him driving a very large toilet bowl car. They had been wearing toga's that looked as if made from giant paper squares flapping in the wind.

The alien had wanted to point out this example of human absurdity, but Gaz had fallen back to sleep soon after takeoff. In fact, soft whispered snores were sounding from the right side of the cockpit. If they had been emitted by anyone else, Zim would have been very annoyed. But those sounds were soothing to Zim right now. It was the sound of all being well in the Gaz-partner's slumber. Besides, anything was better than Gir's six months long Doom song. It had taken Zim a long time to recover from _that_ experience.

* * *

Gaz awoke to the sounds of a city's early morning traffic. She looked around the bubble canopy and saw they were now moving along the street towards a parking structure a few blocks from the convention center. She motioned Zim to open the canopy as they pulled up, and paid the attendant the parking fee with a couple of bills. The facility had just opened up and was mostly empty, but vehicles were already starting to pull in.

Upon reaching their assigned space, the Voot Cruiser thumped onto the concrete and powered down. Zim and Gaz hopped out. The green girl stretched her legs as the green alien walked behind the Cruiser to open the hatch and pull Gir out. Zim untied the robot in the dog suit.

"Gir! While the AMAZING Zim and the Gaz-partner are putting the humans in their rightfully low place beneath our heels, you may tour the city as you like. Make sure to leave at least half of it standing by the time we are done."

Gaz let out a not-so-subtle cough.

"I mean most of the city," Zim corrected.

Gaz now cleared her throat.

"At least ninety percent of the city."

"ZIM!"

"FINE!" Zim hollered back over his shoulder and rolling his eyes. "Gir, you may not destroy anything during the competition."

"Oookey dokey," Gir responded. He turned and walked away taking in the sights and sounds of the new cityscape.

"Much better," Gaz said as she walked up to Zim.

Zim looked back as the costumed girl. This mild squabbling over nothing was trying, and yet strangely gratifying at the same time. The mismatched expression on Gaz's lower face and her eyes said something along those lines too.

They turned and left the garage, crossed the increasingly busy street and approached the convention center. It was only a little after 8:30am, but the crowds were already starting to roll in. The games would officially begin in one hour. As they walked across the open plaza to the row of doors leading inside Gaz's heart rate increased. Yes, she was nervous. After all this was a big event, and while she was good, she had never actually been to one before. She looked over at Zim noticing their pace had slowed somewhat.

Zim definitely looked uneasy, looking back and forth with his solid red eyes and antennae twitching lightly. Gaz looked around, seeing only a crowd of humans. Then something clicked in her brain. One alien in the open without a disguise in a quickly gathering crowd of humans. Perhaps looking like his Irken self for the first time being surrounded by humans. And he had a thing about exposure.

Gaz stopped and called to her partner. "Zim." He stopped too. "Zim, look at me."

Zim looked at Gaz, her green skin, solid amber eyes, and antennae. Similar enough to his own appearance. She leaned in closer to him. "Zim, there are no aliens here," she softly told him so she wouldn't be overheard. "Just two people that look Irken and you just have the most authentic, awesome costume on Earth."

Gaz reached over and took his three fingered hand in her five fingered one. The message was clear to Zim. _Don't worry. I'm with you. I got you covered. I've got your back._

Gaz took a deep breath and Zim followed her example, and began to feel better. Next to an Irken looking Gaz-partner and among other humans in various (and much more ridiculous) team costumes and made-up uniforms no one would see Zim as different. It was the perfect camouflage, hiding in plain sight. His tension eased back to normal.

Zim nodded a thanks to Gaz and the two walked inside, hand in hand.

* * *

After standing in one of many registration lines, Gaz signed them in, had their GameSlave 3's scanned for their network serial numbers over their primitive wireless link. The lady registering them as competitors handed them a yellow event schedule and two sticky nametags still yet to be peeled off their protective sheet.

"Be sure to read this over," the lady droned flatly. She was going to have to repeat herself hundreds of times in the next few hours. "There have been a few changes this year."

The pair moved out of the way and into the hall leading into the main convention area. She led Zim by the hand to a less crowded zone. He looked at her nametag as she doodled something on his, using the wall as a surface. On the top corner of the tag was her name, "_GAZ"_, in smaller letters. Along the bottom in slightly larger lettering was their team name, "_Impending Doom"_.

Zim had gotten a kick out of that one when Gaz had suggested it. She thought if they were going as Irken Invaders, they may as well play the part. To a degree of course. Zim naturally approved.

In the middle in the largest and most readable letters was her CWZ user name. "_The Wind."_

Gaz finished and handed Zim his own name tag. There was his own CWZ user name. "_The Whirlwind." _Up in the blank corner Gaz had drawn in her caricature of the tornado with fierce eyes and a missile launcher over its shoulder. Plain to see, yet not making the name tag illegible. Zim placed it on his chest where she pointed it should go, and then asked for his partner's tag.

He doodled with her pencil for a minute before handing it over to the girl. As she looked at it she smiled. Up in the blank corner was her own caricature that Zim had drawn for her. It was a storm cloud with it's arms raised over its head and fingers stretched forward as if in pursuit of a fresh victim. It's exhalation of doom from puckered lips was in the process of uprooting trees and overturning cars.

"Thanks, Zim," Gaz said as she slapped the name tag to her own chest. "Okay, here is what the schedule says. It starts out loosely structured. We can start anytime after the event begins until 1:00pm. We'll be automatically linked against random teams in the convention center. The sixty teams with the best average scores graduate to the computer network. Instead of a best 2 of 3 games setup like last year, when one of those teams gets called up they have two hours to get another best average score. The top ten teams will then…" she paused.

Gaz looked intently at Zim. "Tonight they will be given a free copy of the new _CWZ II: Online_ that will be used in the finals, six months before it's release date. _You are going to get me that game_, ZIM!"

"You doubt the MIGHTY ZIM?" The alien struck an absurdly heroic pose. Gaz was not impressed.

"Whatever. Just get me my game. Tomorrow is dedicated to the top ten teams running the new edition against each other in the virtual cockpit rigs. Standard 3 out of 5 elimination rounds. The audience will be able to watch on the big screen displays."

"Excellent. Once we have the new edition, we will be able to practice on the system back home," the alien schemed. "We will be more ready than anyone else!" He cracked a maniacal laugh.

"Think again, Zim. You can do that. I will need sleep."

"Oh, right. Zim will examine, prepare, and fill you in tomorrow."

"Okay." Gaz looked at Zim with a cocky sort of smile. "You ready to pulverize our competition?"

He looked at her as if she had asked a rather dumb question. "Zim is always ready to squish things into gooiness. IT WILL BE GLORIOUS GOO!"

Gaz just shook her head as she grabbed Zim and lead him into the main convention area.

* * *

Lights flashed on the police cars stationed around a rundown house as officers in SWAT body armor took up positions. Someone with a bullhorn was calling for someone else to surrender, who was yelling something unpleasant back. A flash-bang grenade and tear gas canisters sailed into the window and detonated with loud pops. SWAT officers moved in, pouring into the house yelling repeated commands.

Outside on a fence sat a green dog with a filthy pig he had met on a farm just outside of city limits.

"I like this show." Gir told the pig, stuffing his face with popcorn. The pig grunted in response.

* * *

The main auditorium was a very large structure, yet it seemed crowded. There were vendors everywhere selling souvenirs, food, games, T-shirts, books and nearly everything else they could get people to spend their money on. Along the outer wall was the roped off computer network section where technicians were testing the hundred desktop systems for readiness to allow up to twenty five-player teams to play at once. And over to one side of the convention center was the large platform area where ten of the cockpit rigs, identical to the ones Zim built in Gaz's Gaming Den, were positioned.

Most of the thousands that were attending were teens and college students that lived within a five hour drive, but not serious competitors. They were here for the promotional side of the event, introducing new gaming products, and hanging out with online friends in person. The majority of this category would come and go as the day wore on.

Those were referred by the real gamers like Gaz as cannon fodder. They were not a threat in the gaming world, and it was entertaining to watch them try as she and Zim mowed them down on their GameSlaves. Zim and Gaz had found a table near the edge of the milling throng where they could sit and not be too bothered by the commotion.

"Zim, I've got five rifle infantry on my tail. Making my way to the village now," Gaz spoke to her partner as her sniper character dashed through jungle. "Will enter on your two-one-zero."

"Understood. Zim is in position, standing by."

Gaz slowed a little, not wanting to open the distance too much as her pursuers were not as fast. She broke out into the open and ran to the buildings of the village. Short bursts of fire came behind her. She ducked around a corner, then another to maintain her course. Crossing the village square she entered one of the far huts and took a position in a window. The five in pursuit came in to the square and opened up with suppressive fire, peppering the window and causing Gaz to duck down while two opponents moved forward.

"Okay, move in."

Zim's Gun Tank turned the corner from where it was concealed and into the village square from the north. The alien mashed down a button and twin autocannons roared to life as his MBT charged into the open space. The opposing team turned to run as they began to get hosed. Gaz popped back up and aimed. All opponents were down in less than seven seconds.

Far off they could hear a series of "What the?" Gaz answered with a loud call of "Don't bring a rifle to a tank fight!"

"Noobs," she muttered as she climbed into her Scout GEV. Gaz zoomed off with Zim's MBT trailing behind her.

"Yes," Zim agreed. "That was even worse than a typical rookie mistake. Zim believes they will all use their heavy armor next. This will restrict them to the main roads. You should be clear in the jungle once you proceed on foot."

"Will do. I'll park up ahead near the bridge and swing wide through the river crossing downstream. If you deploy in front of my car they may think I'm still in the area to pick them off if they try to cross underneath. Think you can hold them?"

"Zim will hold their attention. Back up plan will be to draw them back to the village and pick them off one at a time in the streets." Tanks did not do well when it came to point blank PPG fire and sticking their noses around corners to check for hostiles. This particular team was very inexperienced and had little teamwork. Played more like a mob.

"Understood," was Gaz's response. Placing proximity mines around resupply depots and trails leading from spawn points always got a reaction from those who encountered them. Usually along the lines of _unfair_.

She parked her Scout GEV behind a boulder and took off on foot into the trees as Zim settled his MBT near another and pointed his turret down the center of the bridge. Zim could hold this chokepoint for several minutes with his engineer driver to help repair the tank. Then their opponents would respawn and run into Gaz's proximity mines as they ran straight to their vehicle park. The confusion would delay and confuse the other team and give her time to secure mission objectives which was where the real points were earned. Gaz really did like these jungle maps! There were so many opportunities to be devious.

* * *

Zim popped off another heavy rocket at an MBT and ducked back behind his rock. _ Zim hates deserts, _he thought. More autocannon fire sprayed the boulder in front of his rocket infantryman. Two of the opposing MBT sat at the passage leading to their base held off by a field of anti-tank mines. Zim had taken out one of the four before losing his own rocket tank, and another has strayed into the mines. Zim was still taking pot shots at the two that were left.

"Zim is on foot, but holding. Sitrep?"

"Same. They've got air support that took out my tank. I've got one MBT and now an APC pulling up. Think the APC will cover an engineer driving that MBT as he tries to clear these mines. Yep, there he goes. Oooh, didn't expect a proximity mine in the AT ones did ya?" Gaz let fly her own shoulder launched ATm and ducked back under cover from the torrent of fire from the APC. It was too close to use mortars, but if it backed off she could run forward and plant more proximity mines to interfere with clearing the AT mines.

At the first desert map they spawned into they had put their defensive strategy to the real test. The reasoning was to see if it actually worked early in the competition against inexperienced teams and refine it for later. Unfortunately what they had got was NOT an inexperienced team. It had turned into a siege, and all Zim and Gaz could do was hold the line. While they had knocked out two more vehicles than they had lost and were in the lead in that sense, they had not reached any mission objectives and were behind in points.

"Zim, we can hold these guys off for another hour probably, but it's dragging our average score down. I need to break out of here to go for the objectives."

"What do you need of Zim?" he asked.

* * *

Razor Charlie sprayed another autocannon burst from his APC. "Bravo, what do you have on your end?"

The five members of Team Razor was sitting circled around a table intent on their GameSlaves. They were young men, but all were die-hard Royal Marines from England and had been planning this vacation for three months. They were definitely NOT one of the noob teams. "Yeah, all I can see is one guy on this end. Looks like rocket infantry covering a minefield."

"Same here. Echo, make a low pass and see what else is in there."

"Roger," Razor Echo acknowledged. His aircraft made a single swoop over the enemy base. A missile warning came up and he swung high into evasive maneuvers. "I confirm only two player IFF tags. Rest are NPC's"

Razor Alpha whistled. The other side was doing pretty good for only having two people in it. Given their prepared fortifications they clearly knew what they were doing. That proximity mine in the middle of the AT field had been a nasty surprise to him. He had now respawned and was on his way back in a Scout GEV to quickly get back in the tank he abandoned. But they had the other team contained and would eventually push their way in to secure more mission objectives.

"Hang on," Razor Delta called. "My guy is moving off. Looks like he's falling back."

"Probably going to their GEV park for more firepower," Alpha thought out loud. "Bravo, can you clear those mines? Delta you cover him. See if you two can breach their perimeter."

Two acknowledgements came back as Charlie put another burst from his APC's autocannon at his defender's side of the siege line. That player was still taking shots at him with rocket fire. Most likely another rocket infantry judging from that ammunition supply and the damage he had already accumulated. Fortunately Alpha was on his way back to him with an engineer kit.

"I've got movement on their airfield," Echo informed his team.

"Airfield? That makes no sense. Are you sure they only have two guys?" Bravo asked.

"Making a strafing run now." Heavy autocannon rounds burst from his aircraft. "Okay, its somebody called _Whirlwind_ in a plane. That your guy?"

"Yeah that's him. What are they up to? They need all they have to hold the approaches."

"I'm not going to complain. Echo, keep your guy busy while we breach the perimeter. We only have two minutes left on the timer."

"On it." Echo circled back around. "I took a missile hit earlier, but I got a burst on him too. Looks about even." The aircraft ahead of him reached into the sky and wobbly banked south. Razor Echo grinned. This would be easy. The software wasn't interfaced well for the aircraft aspect of the game, but Echo was a Marine Aviator. He did this for a living.

Alpha caught back up with Charlie and began repairs to his APC while Charlie spat a stream of fire at his opponent to keep his head down. Then Alpha would hop back in his MBT.

Echo reported some more to his teammates. "Pulling in behind him now. He's not even taking evasive. Looks like making a run for our base." Echo increased the power setting more to close the distance. He came into range and open up with another burst, taking off most of the health points on his target. He lined up again and fired. "Dang it, he bailed out at the last second. His plane is going down but he made it out." Echo pulled up and into the sun.

Alpha responded. "Understood. Come back around and help us take down this _Wind_ character. Then we can hit their base in a pincer movement and rack up some points." He climbed back into his tank as Echo swung back to begin another strafing run.

Charlie's APC swung back to increase the range while Alpha moved his MBT to the far side of the minefield to get an angle on their opponent as Echo swung in up above. Alpha and Charlie opened up with concentrated PPG and mortar fire as Echo fired a salvo of missiles. Multiple explosions pounded their opponent's position. "Good job guys," Alpha praised. "Wind is down. Now let's get through this minefield before he comes back."

Several acknowledgments came back. Then Echo called out. "Missile fire, AAm inbound! Multiple AAm's inbound."

"ATm's, I've got multiple ATm's," Delta and then Bravo chanted. Delta continued, "_Their IFF's, repeat IFF's!"_ Fire-and-Forget guided missiles branched out.

"I see two more missile trails heading to you Alpha! Probably unguided, long range, take evasive now!" Echo called as his aircraft twisted in the air. "Two more AAm's in the air!"

Two ATm's slammed into Delta's MBT, then two more impacted Bravo's. "Delta down."

"Bravo down."

Echo's aircraft dodged two AAm's as they tried to circle back on him and then two more crashed into the plane. "Echo down."

On Alpha and Charlie's screens a flash of white blanked out the entire display. "Alpha down."

"Charlie down."

All their GameSlaves went black. The game had timed out, and was uploading data.

"What the bloody hell just happened? Where did all that fire come from?" Charlie asked rubbing his hair.

Alpha began snapping orders. "Log into the main server and switch to standby status." He entered commands into his own GameSlave. "Bring up your game logs." He pulled a pencil and notebook out of his uniform pocket. The others crowded around to share their displays.

_Echo: Missile IF hit 32hp to The Wind._

_ Echo: Missile IF hit 16hp to The Wind._

_ Charlie: Mortar IF hit 23hp to The Wind._

_ Charlie Mortar IF hit 19hp destroyed The Wind._

_ Delta: ATm direct hit 500hp from The Whirlwind._

_ Delta: MBT/Player destroyed by ATm critical hit 438hp from The Whirlwind._

_ Bravo: ATm direct hit 500hp from The Whirlwind._

_ Bravo: MBT/Player destroyed by ATm critical hit 403hp from The Whirlwind._

_ Echo: AAm hit 400hp from The Whirlwind._

_ Echo: Aircraft/Player destroyed by AAm hit 23hp from The Whirlwind._

_ Charlie: APC/Player destroyed by Tactical Nuke 1 flash hit 10,000hp from The Whirlwind._

_ Alpha :MBT/Player destroyed by Tactical Nuke 2 flash hit 10,000hp from The Whirlwind._

_Total team kill by The Whirlwind. Bonus points awarded._

_ Victory for Impending Doom._

Alpha added two more names and the team to his list in his notebook. Then looking at it, underlined the first two three times.

Only one thing could launch nukes, and their logs showed who had. But the end had come so fast that they were having trouble recollecting just what happened.

"Okay, skull session," Alpha declared. While Echo was a fighter jock, Alpha acted as an ad hoc intelligence grunt in his armor company's command-and-control vehicle. This sort of thing was what _he_ did for a living. "I want to know _who _just smacked us down like a bunch of kittens on catnip. Delta your sketchbook and pencils please?"

Alpha wasn't the highest ranked of the group, but he was the smartest so he was in charge on this vacation.

Delta liked to draw in his spare time so always had sketch materials. So when Delta handed the large pad and colored pencils over, Alpha began to draw out the terrain, his own as well as Charlie's position, the minefield, and where Wind was in cover as well as the estimated health points. He slid it over to the others where they drew themselves in. Alpha picked up a colored pencil and drew in his own maneuvers. The others drew theirs in next. Echo's was of course very loopy at the end as he was trying to evade anti-aircraft missiles.

Next Alpha drew in their firing sequence, numbering them in order, then had the group draw in the hostile missile paths in order. Again Echo's was the most challenging, but the fighter jock knew his maneuvers and the angles of attack of the incoming missiles at key points. He could fill in the blanks fairly accurately.

All the hostile tracks converged on a single point. "Okay, Whirlwind made an escape for the walker. That's obvious in hindsight," Alpha stated. _Nobody _went for the walker in the _first hour _of the convention. This was the stage of teams sizing each other up, not going for broke. "Then he came back to reinforce their position. But stopped here," pointing to the source of the missile tracks.

"Okay, let me think." Alpha slapped his own notebook down and stared at the display before him, picturing each element, its order and speed as it all moved in slow motion in his mind. All of their units had been at half strength, but it had been enough for a final push.

Something was missing. The missile tracks weren't adding up in his mind. The order seemed all wrong.

Charlie was looking too, scratching his chin. "Wind is an odd name in the gaming world. Are we sure it's a guy?"

Alpha's brain when_ CLICK._ That's when their game fell apart around them. When Wind went down Whirlwind stopped and fired his salvos. Alpha went back to the missile tracks carefully. The ones between the walker and where Alpha and Charlie had been were the longest.

"Okay guys, when we took down Wind, the first thing this guy did was fire a nuke at me and Charlie with our names practically written on them. Specifically at _each_ of us. One was overkill, but that wasn't good enough. Wind probably gave him our exact positions. Then he lobbed two AAm's at Echo, probably as a distraction. Then he went after you two," pointing at Bravo and Delta, "just to knock you out of the picture. Then came the next pair of AAm's for the kill shot on Echo."

The other four were nodding. It was logical. Alpha continued. "Here's the unnerving part."

"These are the impacts." He tapped the map on their ending positions roughly in the order and timing that they went down in. Tap Tap, Tap, Tap Tap. Nearly simultaneously. "And the two nukes landed on their targets precisely enough that I didn't even register splash damage from his before my nuke did me in _from thirty meters away."_

"And now for the scary part. Everyone who helped take down Wind raise their hand." Alpha, Charlie and Echo raised hands. "Now those who got hit with double or more firepower to take us out raise their hands." No hands changed positions. "Now those three that got taken down last." Again no hands changed positions.

"When we took down Wind, this guy fired at us _first_ for total overkill, yet did so in a way that saved us for _last._ He did this on purpose. This was a precisely planed and accurately executed fire order with multiple outgoing vectors and I'm betting he did it in less than five seconds."

Whistles went around the table. "He's military. Thinking Fire Support Coordinator?" Bravo asked.

"I'm guessing both sides. The kind of guy who knows how to not just coordinate, but also how a pilot needs to lay them in to achieve a precise pattern," said Echo. The fighter jock knew something about that sort of work and knew exactly what it took to do it right. "The kind that goes in alone at night, plots GPS coordinates for a couple dozen stationary targets, then lights up anything moving with a laser designator before he guides in a B-52 to carpet the area with guided munitions so everything goes up at once. Probably had flight training but doesn't have the knack. He probably can't dogfight or do complex maneuvers. At least not in the game."

"You're talking a Special Forces type. The kind as in where they went to preschool is considered classified."

"Wow, now I don't feel so bad about getting our rear ends kicked up over our heads," said Bravo.

Alpha was looking at his notebook. Something was still nagging at him, like a piece was still off. Wind. Whirlwind. He looked at his GameSlave. The names weren't written down right. He made the adjustments. _The_ Wind. _The_ Whirlwind. Why did that sound familiar? Forces of nature, but that wasn't it. Not something unusual in the gaming world after all. But this particular combination felt more like something when his grandmother used to speak about old sayings. He thought for a moment before going still and writing in a few more words. He just looked at his notebook for a minute.

"Uh, guys." Alpha said. The others looked at him. "We just covered the logical, unnerving and scary parts, right?" They grunted. "I may have just found the paranoid part." He showed him his notebook.

_(They sow )The Wind(, they will reap )The Whirlwind._

_Team Impending Doom_

"Guys, this was not an attack. This was a bloody message. Don't mess with The Wind. You and everyone with you will be utterly annihilated simply as a warning for others."

"Okay, we're a team." Delta pointed his finger to include all of them, then pointed at the notebook. "_That_ is way more than just a team."

"Oh, bloody hell. We ganged up and pissed on the guy's _wife."_

"What she might be isn't conclusive. We'll call it a single male/female integrated pair, and every other team here has at least four or more people." Bravo pointed out. "They deliberately came here outnumbered at literally _every_ match, and these people are serious players. They did _not_ come here just to goof off or out of some fools errand. That says they think they can get to the finals on their own."

Alpha shook his head. "If they just thought that they'd bring a few more with them just to make sure." He tapped the map they had drawn to emphasize a point. "Nope, they _know_ they can. As a fact. They didn't come here to _play _against the competition. They came to _destroy_ the competition. So here's what _we_ do. Keep your mouths shut. We proceed as planned, but when we go on breaks mill around and keep your eyes and ears open. I want to ride their coattails in and they will take out a lot of the competition. If you hear anything about a pair, and these two names in particular, tell me. I want to know what they can do. We might even see them in the semi-finals if there are several empty computer stations around them."

"Now," he continued flipping a page in his notebook, "I've got ten quid on wife. Anyone want to bet on twin sister?" He wrote the bets down.

* * *

The game had closed down and Gaz looked at Zim. "I thought we agreed on you holding back."

"That _was_ me holding back. I stayed at maximum missile range and fired at the last possible moment." Zim looked at her with his red eyes. "Besides everyone we know knows better than to mess with the Gaz-partner. These people do not. Should they not learn that messing with the Gaz-partner brings unpleasant experiences?"

Gaz couldn't fault the alien for that. If there was one thing she had lived by all these years it was _Don't mess with Gaz. Bad things will happen._ She couldn't blame him for following that line of thinking when something impacted her. "Alright, but you can't do that all the time. Now let's go stretch our legs for at least five minutes. Mine are falling asleep."

So with that they powered off their GameSlaves and wandered about the vendor's stalls.

* * *

They had no clue of Team Razor's discussion taking place on the other side of the convention as they did so. The Razors conclusions were based on a few incorrect but logical assumptions, mainly that both were human and lived normal human lives. So they were off on quite a number of details, but it was a bit eerie as to how close they were overall.

* * *

A/N: Okay, that turned into a long chapter, and when I started I didn't intend to write extensively about any of the other competitors. Also, this chapter was supposed to cover the entire first day, but ended up covering only the first hour! But an idea struck me as I was going along and would not leave me alone so I went with it. Hope it works for you readers! I tried to make it plausible and not _too_ clairvoyant, but you can learn a lot about a person by watching their exaggerated responses.

I've also been thinking about the Wind/Whirlwind proverb since about chapter five or earlier and how much it can become a part of the story. While it seems unlikely that Zim would have deliberately learned of this old saying, who knows what his subconscious has picked up in all the years he's been on Earth. Maybe it's trying to tell him something. That's my thought and I'm sticking to it. :)

Also, I figure that if a team were to go to the extent of traveling several thousand miles to attend a video game competition, they would have to be very, very good and not just your average stink-humans. Not that they would ever notice an alien even if he was sitting next to them! Zim clearly just has a skin condition. I will continue to exclude OC names as they are unimportant to the story. May change that later if its necessary.


	12. Chapter 11

A/N: Thanks again to the following people for their reviews on the last chapter: .angeladickson18, Kaylee Or Something, Kazehana23, Madiphan99, memmek10k, and Zerg170. You guys help keep the story going. Thank you for the encouragement.

In writing these chapters, I'll just bring out some of the highlights of Zim and Gaz's "greatest hits." (Sorry, I couldn't help it.) After all, this chapter has its limits and I'm not going to write about each game they face. Some are wins, some are draws, perhaps even a few minor losses. They are unimportant.

The Team Dragon's Fang is contributed by Zerg170. Thanks!

I do not own Invader Zim. I also do not own Mars, Saturn, or Neptune. I am thinking of buying Alpha Centuari. Wouldn't it be cool to be able to go up to some one like Donald Trump and say "You think you're big? I own my own star system!" Of course then he'd go and buy up the rest of the galaxy so never mind.

* * *

Diamond One lead the column in his Scout GEV followed by a Rocket MBT, an APC, and a Gun MBT guarding the rear. Diamond Five guarded their base behind a line of mines with a heavy infantry rig. They had no contact with their opponents so far, not even a probe. One was on point for his group driving down a forested road. While they could drive through the forest, it was slower and they would have to wind through trees and rocks, making it that much more difficult to navigate a direct path. This was a Recon In Force sortie, a slower but heavy probe into enemy territory.

They were traveling down a long stretch of road, nearing the hostile base when Diamond Three spoke up. "Aircraft up high." A series of bursts from the APC's medium autocannon streaked into the sky. "He's just taking evasive and circling just out of range. Looks like an Eye in the Sky. Sticking behind us."

"Understood," Diamond One acknowledged. "Four, keep an eye on him. Three, keep yours peeled on our flanks."

Ten seconds later Diamond One's Scout GEV exploded. "AT mines! Back off! Back off!" he called out as his respawn timer began counting down. Sometimes mines could be placed to the side of a path as well as the front.

"Missile fire incoming, from the hill dead ahead," came from Diamond Two driving his Rocket MBT. "Read one IFF tag. Rocket Tank. Five hundred yards." He cut loose with his own volley. Eight detonations walked up their column damaging their vehicles. "His missile pods are empty." A final missile trail reached out to the opponent's position and there was an explosion. "Got the tank, but I used up my pods too."

"Roger," Diamond Three said. "I'm at half strength."

"Same here," said Diamond Four in his Gun MBT at the end of the column. "Aircraft is moving away. Still behind us. Flanks are still clear."

A second set of volleys reached out from the same position. "Incoming!" Diamond Two warned. "There's a second Rocket Tank! Bail! Bail!"

With nothing that could match the engagement range of the second Rocket Tank and anti-tank mines in front of them, the team bailed out of their vehicles and ran into the trees on either side of the road as the second set of missiles walked up the armor column. This time vehicles began to explode. While losing those GEV's was bad, giving up player kills increased the points the other side could earn with the vehicles destroyed. Bailing out made this aspect more difficult, even if it took longer to return to their base. Sometimes the tradeoff worked out, sometimes it didn't.

"I thought you said there was only one guy!" Diamond Four exclaimed as they retreated on foot.

"There was!" Diamond Two exclaimed. "Shoot! He must have had two tanks parked up there, emptied one and then hopped into the other to finish us off!"

* * *

There had been in fact four GEV's parked nearby. Zim jumped his avatar out of the second Rocket Tank and climbed into the Scout GEV parked nearby. The Gun MBT would be abandoned. "All vehicles destroyed, drivers have bailed out. Backup plan is unnecessary. You may proceed to phase two."

Gaz's eye's gleamed as she banked her aircraft. "On the way."

* * *

Diamond One had respawned and was running to their GEV park. An explosion rocked the ground near the passage to the base. "I'm down!" Diamond Five called out.

"What happened?" Diamond One asked.

"Somebody crashed their plane into my position! The minefield is gone!"

Diamond One's avatar collapsed and his respawn timer counted down again. "What the...?" He swiveled his view around to see what happened. "Sniper! Sniper parachuting into the GEV park! Respawn in twenty seconds."

"We're still two minutes out," Diamond Two informed the others.

"Respawning as Rocket Infantry," Diamond One responded. _If that guy jacks one of our GEV's this could get messy real quick, _he thought.

"Copy. Will do also," Diamond Five replied.

They respawned in the base courtyard and ran to either side of the GEV park's gate. The area was walled off with open arches on the sides to help protect them from attack by intruders. Diamond One and Five closed in on each side of the nearest gate and swung inside ready to pop off rockets on the captured vehicle inside.

_Crack Crack._ Both avatars went down.

"What the..." He briefly saw a IFF tag but it was too fast to see exactly where. "_Wind_ is using the GEV's as _cover_! Did you see him?" One asked.

"Not even close."

"Come back as Heavy Infantry and try to hold the position. I'll stay as a Rocketman. Maybe we can keep him contained until the others get back."

_Wind_ poked a Gun MBT's nose out of the open gate and took a heavy ATm to the side as the vehicle fired an unaimed spray at Diamond Five, then retreated back into the GEV park. Diamond One and Five crouched on either side of the gateway once more. Finally Two, Three and Four came running up to join them. All but Two and Five had their infantry rockets over their shoulders. Diamond Five was carrying the light autocannon of a Heavy Infantry trooper. Diamond Two threw in a smoke grenade. Two more sniper shots rang out but missed due to the haze.

_I hate it when they are unpredictable._ Diamond One thought. All they're attention was on retaking their GEV park ASAP. They needed those vehicles right now. No doubt other opponents were gathering and moving their way. They were counting off to storm the park when a large shadow loomed over the row of avatars. Diamond Three spun around to look behind them.

"Oh CRAP!"

The others of Team Diamond turned to look, then looked up. The red hostile IFF tag _The Whirlwind_ was hanging in the air above them as the Armored Assault Walker stepped into the open courtyard. The upper torso turned toward the row of figures standing with their backs against the outside wall of the GEV park. Both arms, each limb ending in a Phased Plasma Gun with two of the large caliber multi-barreled Gauss autocannons mounted on each wrist, pointed at them.

It would have made a perfect scene for a firing squad against mosquitoes via heavy machine guns and howitzers.

The Walker fired a long concentrated burst, raking the wall, then turned to walk calmly through the Diamond Team's base. Then the rout began on the NPC's running around the base peppering the Walker with small arms fire. It is amazing what heavy caliber armor-piercing tungsten cored bullets, at a rate of two hundred rounds per second in sustained fire, can do in the middle of an enemy base.

It took less than a second for Diamond One to weigh the odds and come to a decision. "Everyone log out. The game's a bust."

"We're not even going to try?" Diamond Two asked. Fifteen seconds remained on the respawn timer.

"Our GEV park is captured. You want to try to break a spawn camp with a Walker using only infantry? Why give them more points? End the game. They're racking up more points by the second just taking out NPC's."

Diamond Two had already begun logging out.

* * *

A message scrolled across the bottom of Zim's GameSlave display. _Diamond Two has logged off. _Zim spun the Walker's torso around, pressing one, then another button twice as the armored body swung around.

* * *

The rest of Team Diamond's displays turned white as two small mushroom clouds expanded over the GEV park, courtyard and the airfield. The entire Diamond base was scorched earth. There were no NPC's, waiting GEV's or parked aircraft. Everything was gone and waiting to respawn. Including the Walker and_ Wind_ too. Then the GameSlaves finished logging off.

"What the heck?" exclaimed Diamond Four. "He saw we were forfeiting, so he nuked their own position?"

Diamond Two was looking at his game log. Messages were scrolling.

_Total Team Kill by The Whirlwind. Bonus points awarded._

_Diamond GEV Park disabled. Bonus points awarded._

_ Diamond Airfield disabled. Bonus points awarded._

_ All Diamond GEV's destroyed. Bonus points awarded._

_ All Diamond aircraft destroyed. Bonus points awarded._

_ All Diamond NPC's destroyed. Bonus points awarded._

_ Victory for Impending Doom._

"He killed his own side to get as many points as he could because we wouldn't give up more. Dude, that is inhuman."

* * *

On the other side of the convention center Gaz stood up and slugged the alien on the shoulder.

"Ow! What was that for?" Zim asked plaintively. His GameSlave was scrolling its own game log and the flashing message _New high score._

"_That_ was for nuking your partner." Gaz explained in a huff. Then she grabbed him in a long and thankful bear hug from behind. "And _this_ is for getting us in the semi-finals."

The green girl let go of the thoroughly squished green alien. He rubbed his ribs. "If we win the whole competition, what will you do to Zim? Run over his head?"

"Oh, I'll think of something good."

"That is what Zim is afraid of."

Gaz looked down at Zim. His face was serious, but his solid red eyes betrayed a flicker of humor in them.

"Come on, it wouldn't be bad! You can trust me."

Zim looked up straight into Gaz's eyes and the humor vanished. "Yes, Zim trusts his Gaz-partner," he said in an almost small voice, almost like an admission.

The human girl looked back into those eyes of the Invader. The undisguised alien sitting amid a crowd of several thousand humans. And many of the top teams here were professional soldiers. _To him this must be like soaking himself in steak sauce and crawling into a lion's den,_ Gaz thought. _As if the only thing preventing his demise is me wearing an Irken costume. But he's not even anxious anymore. He's done so willingly because I asked, just so I could win some contest over a game! Well, plus to annoy Dib._

_ I doubt he even realizes that he's ended up taking a vacation from his all-important mission just so I could be here._

She began to realize just how far that trust went. This was a deep personal trust. Gaz tried not to let herself show it, but this touched her. In fact her heart melted just a bit more.

This wasn't a feeble _you-won't-ruin-my-laundry_ trust or a kind of _you-won't-plug-up-my-toilet-and-leave-it _trust. More like an official _Zim-can-count-on-Gaz-to-cover-Zim's-back-when-the-whole-sky-is-coming-down-on-his-head-come-hell-or-high-water _sort of trust. She knew this was something Zim never had before, not with anybody, let alone a _human._ Zim didn't understand friendship. Nothing in his Irken Military culture or training even had the concept of friendship. But Zim could learn and understand partnership, which could be similar and perhaps even deeper.

What Gaz saw in Zim's red inhuman eyes was the trust of a true partner. It was sort of like exchanging "Free Get out of Hell" cards. The drop-everything-and-out-the-door-in-ten-seconds, good at any time, never expiring, no questions asked, and never counting the cost sort of card. Good for a lifetime and for as many occasions as needed.

This was no small thing. Not easily earned nor given, not for a soldier. Even less for an Invader. It was the kind of trust most civilians could not really comprehend. Even Gaz had difficulty wrapping her conscious mind around the concept. Part of that was that this sort of trust can and should only go both ways, and she had never been big on trusting enough to let others in. Another had to do with the idea that if she were in trouble, Zim would not hesitate to burn down entire planets to pull her out of harm's way. Not that he wouldn't mess everything up and would need Gaz to fix it all in the end, but still... there wasn't another person in existence who would go to the lengths Zim would for his partner. Zim did not do balanced. Zim went straight to excessive and progressed from there.

Somehow Gaz had earned Zim's confidence. Perhaps even a dash of personal loyalty. Gaz didn't know how or when she had. Perhaps it was that night she saw his memories and gave Zim her own diary. But Zim hadn't really admitted this sort of trust until now. Deep down she knew could never betray something sacred like this. Not now, not ever, not even if her own life depended on it. The girl smiled a soft smile of acknowledgement and acceptance.

Gaz grabbed Zim by the hand and pulled him out of his seat. "Come on, whiner. Let's go get lunch." She may have the smile, but her voice was still the voice of Gaz.

Zim powered off his GameSlave and followed his partner as she bought three hot dogs from a vendor. They spent the rest of that hour eating in the open Voot Cruiser where it was peacefully quiet. "By the way," she asked her friend and partner, "what is it with you and weapons of mass destruction?"

* * *

Gir walked out of the casino with his new pig friend. He had won over two million playing Blackjack, Craps, and then at the Roulette Table. Soon two large gentlemen in black clothing invited them to a back room for a high stakes poker game with the local business owners. Gir had the world's worst poker face. Running around the room squealing just did not get classified as a good poker face.

Gir looked down at the five individual one thousand dollar chips left in his hand. It was the most fun game of Go-Fish he had ever played. And it looked like there were many more such establishments.

* * *

Razor Delta slid into a seat next to Razor Alpha. It was nearing the end of lunch and the results of the morning competition was being broadcast to the GameSlaves of qualifying contenders. Team Razor made it into the semi-finals with scores in the top third. They had run into several more skilled teams than average which affected their scores, but they had made it.

"Heard some news. The Stellar Diamonds are out. They got torn up real bad. Wiped out in fact," Delta commented.

Alpha looked up from scanning his GameSlave for familiar names. The Diamonds weren't one of the best teams out there. Mostly college students, but they weren't bad. They wouldn't have made the finals, but it was surprising they got knocked out of the running already.

"How bad we talking?" Alpha asked.

"How about ambushed, practically executed firing squad style, and then nuked off the face of the Earth bad. Without taking a single player out bad. They are really ticked right now."

"Sounds like they really dropped the ball."

Delta shook his head. "From what I hear, they had a Recon In Force out with a prepared defense and guard back at their base. Somehow the other side infiltrated their GEV park while most of the Diamonds had to run back on foot. A Walker snuck in behind them as they were trying to retake it and it was game over."

Alpha nodded. "Yeah, that sounds bad. Spawn camping Walker with no GEV's? Ugly but not unheard of. I would have logged out to keep their scores from skyrocketing. So what happened?"

"Well, the story is they did exactly what we would have done. But the instant the first guy logged out, the Walker nuked the entire base to kill _everything_ before they could finish," Delta said almost in a whisper.

"I thought you said they were spawn camping the base," Alpha questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah. The guy nuked his own position. The other side quit so he took out everything including his own team to get as many points as possible before the game ended."

"Dang," Alpha commented. "That's cold."

Getting a Walker within missile range of a base was not as easy as it sounded since it was very tall and could usually be seen coming. Plus a Rapid Response Force could move in to keep it occupied, slow it down by damaging its legs or even disabling them completely. Then more firepower could be brought in. It was messy, but that was what usually happened. But when the other side got distracted one could get a walker into the other base. Then it was really messy, but nuking was actually rare since the Walker only had two and most people saved them for when retreat was necessary. Only noobs who didn't know what they were doing nuked their own team, and even then it was an accident. Nobody did that deliberately and especially when they were _winning_.

"Was it anyone we know?" Alpha asked. He continued scrolling through the semi-finals list. This wasn't their first convention and they had a few rival teams out there that were very good. The Crimson Shields, The Crapola's, and the Dragon's Fangs were at the top of their 'use maximum force' list.

"Yeah. The pair that nuked us this morning. That _Wind/Whirlwind_ team," Delta told him.

Alpha pulled out his notebook, found the team name and scrolled through the scores list faster. He had started out at the bottom and hadn't seen them yet. "Why am I not surprised?" he asked no one in particular. "They don't seem to play by any set of standards I've ever heard of."

Alpha finally found _Impending Doom_ on the scores list. He showed Delta his GameSlave screen. "But it sure is working for them."

Team Impending Doom hadn't gotten one of the highest average scores. By so devastatingly defeating the Diamonds they had gotten _the_ highest average.

* * *

Gaz's avatar was driving one of the Scout GEV's through the woods when she bounced out onto the road directly in front of a Rapid Attack Group of four more Scout GEV's. Unexpected as it was, she plowed straight into their formation and all vehicles swerved and dodged as automatic railguns opened up. There was no time to aim with all the frantic maneuvering by all parties, but this was point blank range. Gaz even crashed broadside into one of her opponents.

"Zim! I'm in trouble in grid Foxtrot-five. RAG unit. Going down fast."

"Understood. Zim is moving to a blocking position at grid Delta-four. In a Gun MBT," Zim replied in her headset. Though they were seated next to each other, it was also more crowded with more background noise.

It was now in the late afternoon, second round of three in the semi-finals. The second group of twenty five-man teams were blazing away at the computer desktops stationed around the convention center's perimeter. Competition was definitely heating up.

Gaz's Scout GEV exploded under the hail of four railguns. Through the insulation of her headset she could hear someone yell out nearby, "Wind is down. Ha Ha, what a noob! Go crying back to mama!"

It was not the first time Gaz had been blown up today. In fact it was more like a hundred times by now, but most experienced players at this level had at least _some _respect.

However, these words that reached her ears were _exactly_ the wrong ones to let escape one's lips if she was anywhere in the same _state_, let alone within earshot. Especially if it was deliberate. Gaz was now in full doom mode, especially at that crack about running to her mother. It would be like having a giant neon sign flashing '_BAD IDEA!__'_ over your head.

"Zim," she spoke in a dangerous growl. "I will hold the base. You teach this _puke-scum_ a very up front and ugly lesson."

Zim's Gun Tank changed course. "Is you sure? You have asked Zim several times not to go after those who wrong Zim's Gaz-partner."

"Oh yeah," Gaz spoke in a chill voice. "Make it up close and personal. Tilt, tilt, tilt."

The repeated codeword would sound to others like they were trying to steer a vehicle back down flat against the ground instead of on its side. But what it really meant was for Zim to go _Full _Tilt. Cut loose. Don't hold back.

It meant the leash was officially off.

Gaz respawned and drove another Gun Tank to guard the base entrance. Just in time to meet the Rapid Attack Group. The four Scouts began a pinwheel attack on the lone MBT as it spat back PPG fire. One after another the Scout GEV's circled past, railguns chattering away. Another minute of intense fire went by.

Zim looked briefly at Gaz, and she returned the look. She swore if he had been human his eyes would have just now switched to fully dilated. He had that grin that just spelled trouble. Zim felt his PAK come to life with the feeling of an energy weapon charging up.

And then the _real_ attack came. It was like watching a ballet interpretation of a four car pileup with a freight train.

Gaz stopped firing as the Walker crashed out of the trees like an angry rhino and _kicked_ the nearest Scout GEV onto it's side as the Walker's torso leaned forward and twisted to the right then swung back to the left, colliding its stubby arms like a fist into the next oncoming Scout as the group drove in their circling attack. The second Scout car rose up in mid-air, did a complete flip and crashed back down on its roof. Zim then turned the Walker's path into the next oncoming Scout. The two crashed together as Zim moved forward and pushed the third Scout into the fourth which flew up into the air and tumbled several times on the ground until it came to a stop on its side. The third fired uselessly with its railgun as it was upended over a boulder and landed on its roof as well.

As the avatars bailed out of their disabled vehicles and ran for their cybernetic lives, Zim turned in pursuit and chased them down one by one. Infantry units were not designed to be stepped on by an Armored Assault Walker. Zim had destroyed the entire RAG unit without firing a shot. Only when all four opposing players were respawning did Zim finally open up with PPG _and_ autocannon fire to finish off the loathsome vehicles.

Gaz turned to look at Zim with a gleeful grin plastered on her face and a tear of mirth running down her cheek. Zim appeared to be in a perfect state of bliss, except of course for the maniacal laughter and contained rants of "Run filthy stink-humans! Squish before the might of ZIM!" as he piloted the rampaging walker in search of more targets. Gaz leaned over sideways and bumped shoulders. Zim looked back at her and blinked his eyes, his mind returning to the world.

"Thanks Zim," Gaz told him with the satisfaction of a good dooming dancing in her eyes. "That was perfect. You're awesome."

"Yes, Zim knows," came the alien's reply as he refocused on the game as AAm's and missile decoys jettisoned out of the back of the Walker while three opposing aircraft swooped in firing semi-aimed rockets in return. Explosions rocked the Walker and the nearby landscape as its torso and arms tracked, then the four heavy autocannons mounted on the wrist joints opened up. One plane then another fell from the sky as two MBT's appeared out of the tree line and PPG fire began to race back and forth. "Zim knows Zim's awesomeness."

_That_ earned a mild kick between feet, but not enough to distract. And not because Gaz disagreed at that moment. Somebody had to keep that ego of Zim's in check after all.

* * *

Razor Charlie had been watching a team of dumb punks running down a single player with disgust. Occasionally an undeserving team got randomly setup with so many noob teams that they got into the semi-finals while a good team got the boot. He watched from a distance since blatantly checking out your opponents game play just rubbed everyone the wrong way.

The Razors had run through their own gauntlet in the earlier round and were just waiting around for the other two rounds to finish and the results to be tallied.

A commotion caught Charlie's eye and drew his attention back to the team of punks at the computer terminals. On four of their screens a Walker was going downright medieval on their sorry rumps. At point blank range the hostile IFF tag was visible even from his distance. Charlie pulled out his cell phone.

"Echo? It's Charlie. _Wind_ and _Whirlwind_ are up. I'm in section eight. Get over here."

Charlie began to scan the line of computer stations around the convention perimeter. _There!_ Two players in costume with two empty spaces on the left and one on the right. There could be only one two-man team this far into the competition. Echo came up next to him.

"What you got?" Echo asked.

Charlie just nodded in the direction as he began walking. "The two in the red shirts with pink short sleeves, black pants. Wearing antennae and with green face paint. Just saw _Whirlwind_ go all ninja in a Walker and take out a RAG unit hand-to-hand."

Echo gave Charlie a mildly disbelieving look, but didn't really doubt his word. The two teammates slowly walked past. Charlie dropped a pen and turned to pick it up. Echo almost moved toward a nearby bench to sit down until Charlie made a quiet cough. The two young men walked away.

"What did you pick up?" Charlie asked.

"Not much. I just saw he was missing some fingers and maybe an ear. His headset was kind of sloppy like it didn't have anything to rest on. We could have stopped like we were resting our feet."

"I don't think so," Charlie denied. "You didn't see the girl."

"What about her?"

"She's _armed._ Boot knife inner left side. Brass knuckles outer right. Small thin boots. I could see the outlines when I bent down."

"And he's disfigured," Echo said. "Maybe in action and invalidated out of the service. They're also in full costume. Those kinds of scars can be real bad."

"Yeah, and get a lot of rude attention. Means most likely a pair that is _really_ defensive about being watched. And a girl that packs a concealed knife and knuckles to a _game_ convention is not one to mess around with mere complaints. She'll take care of things personally. Then you throw in Mr. Special Forces next to her who is obviously protective of her as well. I really think we should leave well enough alone."

"Agreed," Echo sighed. There were three more hours until the semi-final results were in. "Let's call the others and grab a beer while we wait. We could use a break."

* * *

The flight home was quiet. Gir was sleeping in the trunk on a few extra suitcases they hadn't brought with them. Zim and Gaz didn't say much either. The day had been packed and Gaz was tired. Zim finally landed the Voot Cruiser back in the attic of his base and opened the canopy. Zim left Gir in the trunk and walked Gaz to her jeep. She turned, clutching a package in both arms to her chest and leaned forward, giving Zim a light peck on the cheek.

"Thank you for getting me my game, Zim," she said.

Zim wasn't exactly sure how to respond, but it was better than being squeezed to paste like he did at lunch. "You may thank Zim tomorrow when we conquer the competition."

"Right. Pick me up in the morning?"

"Of course." Zim turned around to start preparations for the next day. That involved mostly checking out the new _CWZ II: Online._

With that Gaz got in her Jeep and drove home.

* * *

On arriving she shared a microwaved dinner with Dib, who still tried not to stare at her Irken image, and told him about her day. Then she went to turn in early for the night. Gaz had burned up most of her energy in the tremendous focus necessary for most of the day.

As she pulled off the uniform to change into her pajamas, she felt an odd weight shift in one of the pockets. She emptied them. Cash, ID, her keys with a note attached to them…

_Oh, crap,_ Gaz thought. _I forgot again._

She pulled out the second collar with the green gem that Zim had given her this morning. Gaz sighed, pulling open her keepsake drawer and removing the other collar. She set both collars together very carefully on top of her uniform and finished changing for bed, turned off the lights and tucked herself in for the night.

_ I'll take them both tomorrow. I won't forget to give them back to him again, _she promised. Gaz repeated this several times before going to sleep.

The final elements were now in place. Little did they know that tomorrow would change their lives forever.


	13. Chapter 12

A/N: Oh My Word! The reviews for the last chapter are just AWESOME! Thanks guys: memmek10k, Kaylee Or Something, Madiphan99, Zerg170, Kazehana23, Halfinsane-HalfMental (I like the name, LOL!), LittleEnglishLass, FanFicNewb, and of course the mega awesome OMG review of Power Taco! Remember! In the next election for evil supreme overlord, vote Taco! He's got Gir's endorsement!

Another note. Whenever I'm pondering about Zim blazing through the opposition in the Assault Walker, I sometimes listen to Rihanna's song "Shut Up and Drive" to get my brain in the right gear. The lyrics are surprisingly fitting in that context so I think of it as Zim's Walker Devastation theme song. My fav is the one on YouTube under "DATR - Shut Up and Drive."

This is a larger chapter and previously. Figure 28 pages. But its important. It was not easy to write as I am not really inspired to write action scenes. Hope it all works for you guys!

Oh, before I forget again. Team Dragon's Fang donated by Zerg170 and Team Proper Villains by Power Taco. Thanks!

* * *

Gaz opened her solid amber eyes and groaned as her alarm clock buzzed at the crack of dawn once more. It quickly stopped as she hit it with her emergency mace. The still green girl groggily dropped the spiked medieval weapon back under her bed and swung her feet under protest on to the carpet. Gaz dragged her feet on autopilot, gathered her pile of clothes and stumbled into the bathroom to repeat yesterday's morning routine.

The shower took longer as getting up this early two days in a row right after a skool week never helped to cause one to feel perky. But the hot water and steam helped to bring Gaz to her some of her senses and relaxed muscles. She then finished, and brushed her teeth free of morning breath. As she reached for her uniform, the two black metal necklaces briefly caught her eye and she quickly shoved them in a pocket before anything could happen to them, such as getting dropped and lost down the toilet.

Gaz felt good as she pulled on her Invader uniform, feeling the two weights in the pocket. She had actually felt bad about forgetting lately and it really felt good to accomplish her goal of finally remembering. Or was it more about not letting Zim down this time after all he had done for her these past two weeks? Or perhaps it was getting clear of those slave collars, if that's what they were. Zim hadn't actually said they weren't. Whatever it was, it was way too early in the morning for such complex thoughts. Shoveling breakfast into her mouth was a more suited activity for her now semi-awake state.

Zim pulled up to the curb in his Voot Cruiser as Gaz stood waiting in the front door of her house. She called out a good-bye to her still mostly asleep brother, closed the door and ran over to climb into the waiting spacecraft. The girl greeted Zim as she climbed inside next to him and strapped in. Zim handed her a set of goggles and several pages of notes.

"What are these, Zim?" she asked after taking the offered items as the Cruiser took off into the sky.

"Zim has compiled a report of some of the new features found in the game's new version. It includes visuals as well. It has a few noteworthy things that looks promising. You must review quickly and begin familiarizing yourself during the flight."

Gaz ignored the part about how she "must," and quickly read the list Zim had compiled and pulled on the goggles. A display of recorded game visuals appeared before her eyes. _Oh yes, this does look promising,_ she thought. _Not much in Zim's area, but I can make use of this._ Halfway through the flight she pulled out her GameSlave 3, loaded in her new _CWZ II: Online_ game and began to test out possibilities as Zim flew on.

They repeated their parking routine as they had the day before, let Gir out of the trunk, and entered the convention center. As she was still playing on her GameSlave, Zim led Gaz through the light crowd and up to a row near the central platform where the virtual cockpit stations were located and they took their seats in the reserved section. An attendant stopped to check their GameSlave ID numbers to make sure that they were in fact Team Impending Doom before moving on.

They didn't say much of anything. While Zim had all night to check out the new version, Gaz had only the last fifteen minutes of the flight and the walk inside. He didn't want to ruin her concentration now that she could focus without the distractions of a tilting Voot Cruiser or needing to evade collisions in the slowly growing crowd.

While Gaz worked out her own examination, Zim contemplated quietly. It was not something he did very often, or ever really, but there was little else to do as he sat there ready to shoo off those who would interrupt his Gaz-partner's concentration. It was just a game contest and nothing really important, and yet it was. He felt a sense of accomplishing something and was content in the here and now. Zim had overcome several tricky obstacles in adapting human gaming technology first with the GameSlaves and then duplicating the gaming stations under his base in Gaz's Gaming Den. But that wasn't a primary contributing factor in itself. Not really. It was just inferior human technology and fairly simple compared to Irken tech.

Defeating his human foes on the cybernetic battlefield was pleasant, but that wasn't really it either. Winning this contest in itself wasn't such a big deal to Zim. Well, winning anything was a big deal, but that wasn't the primary reason why he was doing this. After all, he wouldn't have joined this event on his own.

Zim looked at the not-ugly Irken looking girl seated next to him. This was her event. Her contest. This was something she wanted. Zim's feeling of accomplishment came from all the support he had contributed toward _her_ goal, for somehow her goal had become his own. Their successes and all they had done, not just here in the convention center but even more importantly all they had done the previous two weeks resulted in satisfaction for Zim. Because it meant something, not so much for himself, but for his remarkable partner.

He wasn't doing this for his mission, his race, or even for his Tallest. Zim was doing all this for his Gaz-partner, and that's all there was to it. He would do his best to give her victory today because it would bring her joy, which she had precious little of in her life. He didn't know what tomorrow would bring. His mission was still active and Gaz would have no part where his mission was concerned. But he sincerely valued the partnership they had forged. The alien never had anything like it before. So the here and now was all that mattered in Zim's current contentment.

Zim had learned a great deal in the past two weeks. Much more than he could comprehend at any one time. So the momentary pondering ended before it could enter more uncomfortable territory, and Zim continued as the self-appointed guardian of Gaz's concentration so that she may learn the new features and know how to implement them when the time came.

Often when Zim got into the Walker, Gaz seemed to fade into obscurity because she would often set the alien up so he could wreck mass havoc. Admittedly it was his specialty, and Gaz was good at what she did as well. But while hogging the spotlight was a good thing according to Zim's ego, he also wanted his Gaz-partner to be able to show how remarkable she truly could be too. Perhaps she could find something suitable. After all, a Human who could come to be seen as a worthy and valued partner to an Irken Invader like Zim was indeed something to behold.

Today was the main event. Technically it was an elaborate commercial to promote the new _Combat WarZone II: Online_ by the corporation. But the crowds didn't care that their thirst for the new product was being intensified. What they cared about was that only the best gamers around got to play on computer setups like the ones being used today, the kind most could only dream about. What would take place in cyberspace would be displayed up on the big screen projectors for the crowds to gawk at, envy and admire. While there was no real prizes, the bragging rights were enormous and everyone present could witness the titans strive to claim who was really the best.

An announcer stood up on the platform before the seated crowd. "Gamers and Gamies, may I have your attention. The Finals will be starting momentarily. All teams please be seated in the reserved section before the main platform. When your team is called forward you will have five minutes to step forward to configure and test your control system before the round begins. Each team will need to win three of five games to qualify for the next round. The winner of the CWZ Finals will receive a trophy in the form of this fruitcake my mother made in 1962. And just a reminder that using fruitcake as projectile weapons is a violation of the Geneva Convention. That is all."

Gaz powered down her GameSlave and took a deep breath. Her nerves were steadily increasing. She looked over at Zim who looked back in return. "Has the Gaz-partner ingested too many butterflies this morning?" the red eyed alien asked.

"What are you talking about?" Gaz asked in puzzlement.

Zim pointed at her tightly clasped hands. "You are showing signs of performance related anxiety. You humans often say this is caused by butterflies in your stomach. Perhaps you need a vomit inducing device? Zim can obtain a picture of the Dib-stink as a worm-baby."

Gaz faced her partner with one of her looks. "Zim, that's just a figure of speech." Then she saw the slight smirk on his face. "But you already knew that."

She softened her face. Sometimes Gaz could forget that Zim wasn't the idiot he could appear to be at times. Especially when he deliberately played on his alien perspective. "It just hasn't hit me until now that so many people are going to be watching us up there."

A green Irken hand reached over and momentarily placed itself over two green human ones. "They are nothing. All humans combined cannot add up to one Gaz-partner. ZIM would not trade his Gaz for your whole world."

Gaz brought a hand up to her mouth when Zim said that. It was not something she had been prepared to hear. Of course she knew what her partner was really trying to do, show her that it didn't matter how many people were watching at the moment. That she had nothing to be concerned about. She would be fine as this was only pre-stage jitters. It was what Zim hadn't realized he had said that got to Gaz.

She knew Zim very well now, and had always known that the alien's mission was everything to him. He would never give up in his assigned duty nor betray that duty. But while Zim did not realize it, he had just stated that if someone presented him with the conquest of Earth on a silver platter if only he would turn over Gaz, he would not deal. In fact, Gaz could well imagine what Zim would actually do in response based on Zim's own past actions just for interfering with the mission. Such a person would spend the rest of their life lamenting the complete destruction of their plot against Earth and the resulting desolation of their existence.

The alien may not have comprehended the meaning of what he had stated, but in those words Gaz heard the unmistakable ring of absolute truth. Zim had just said that Gaz was worth more to him than his mission.

Gaz wasn't sure what to do with this. Never before had _anyone_ thought that about her, or at least really meant it. In fact most of the people in her life was the exact opposite, especially her own family who constantly abandoned her for the sake of personal obsession. So she just patted a hand over the one Zim was resting on her own and gave him a sincere smile of appreciation. "Thank you, Zim."

"Anything for the Gaz-partner," he replied, and Gaz knew Zim meant it. "Now let us get our AMAZING BRAINS in the game."

That sounded like a good idea to Gaz right now. There were some things she was just not used to dealing with. After all, most of her experience was in inflicting doom, not spreading around warm fuzzies. Zim, showing his trademark lack of sense continued. "Have you examined the new VTOL aircraft interface? Zim knows from past experience that you are a natural pilot."

"There are some possibilities," Gaz replied thankful for the diverted topic. "But I won't be able to see infantry under tree cover as well. It will be a challenge to balance what we need on the ground."

The announcer then spoke out over the loudspeakers. "Teams Drinking Buddies and Angry Housewives please report to the stage."

Zim and Gaz turned to watch the start of the show.

* * *

"Next up will be Teams Simulated Posers and Impending Doom. Please take your stations."

Zim and Gaz walked up onto the platform behind five people dressed stereotypically in the various cliques often found in hi-skool and took up stations at the far ends of the double U-shaped arrangement of computer systems. They faced their game systems backs toward each other, able to see their partner in the reflections of the blank display monitors. Gaz handed a moist wipe over her shoulder which Zim took also without looking back. He wiped down his headset, threw the wipe into a nearby trash can, pulled the headset over his head and tucked his antennae into the earphones.

Zim adjusted the microphone positioned in front of his mouth. "Com check. One, two, three."

"I read you clear," Gaz's voice sounded in Zim's earphones.

They began resetting joystick, throttlemaster and mouse buttons for their preferred hotkeys and other commands. The mouse was only used for plotting locations and waypoints on the minimap, but Zim and Gaz rarely used these. The joystick and throttlemaster would be the primary control interfaces. Before each of them was a keyboard, which was also useful at times, and the fifteen display monitors arranged three high forming a semicircle around each player to give a one hundred eighty degree view of their cybernetic environment.

"Wind confirms ready."

"Whirlwind confirms ready."

"Understood," said a nearby network controller. "Team Impending Doom standing by." The controller would log out once the round was initialized so he could not inadvertently feed information to either side. He was there just to get things started. "Team Simulated Posers standing by. Startup in thirty seconds."

The two players sat back-to-back intent on their displays.

"Twenty seconds. Controller logging out. Good Hunting."

Displays came to life, with a spawn-in timer counting down.

"Desert map," Gaz called.

"How do you want to handle this?" Zim asked.

Gaz had been acting as a sort of loose command-and-control unit for the pair so far during the convention. This was to help Zim hold back so as to keep the opposition from learning about their strengths and weaknesses. But now in the Finals, every team and a few thousand people watching, and their first environment being a desert map, that sort of control function was no longer required.

"I'll follow your lead, Zim. Recommend ending this fast."

"Understood, Gaz-partner. Requesting initial fighter cover. Start with a Combat Air Patrol over my position, loaded with air and tank busters and try to keep up. We don't know what they will come out with first."

Their avatars spawned into their base courtyard and the two took off running to the airfield. Zim hopped into the nearest VTOL craft, selected the fastest loadout which was the default setting, and climbed into the sky. Gaz took another fighter, selected the homing missile package and waited the seven second package delay. Then she rose up and took off after Zim.

She could see Zim's fighter up ahead. His voice sounded in her ears. "Approaching waypoint. Zim sees two Scouts on the horizon bearing zero-two-seven heading south in a standard initial forward sweep. Figuring enemy has not reviewed the new features. Gaz, make strafing run on Scout party. Setting collision course with enemy airfield. Bailing out now."

Zim's fighter made a new turn, then a tiny figure in the distance appeared falling from the plane and opened a parachute twenty yards above the Walker. Gaz made a tight turn and punched in the afterburners. She found the two scouts and opened up with her single heavy Gauss autocannon. A stream of tracer rounds reached out to the two vehicles below.

"Scouts are damaged, and are falling back."

"Understood, Zim is on the move. Can you get a damage assessment on the enemy airfield? Be mindful of the new defenses."

Gaz flew her fighter to the other base. As she approached she saw two rocket trails from a pair of missile batteries reach up and impact Zim's abandoned aircraft. It tumbled out of control and slammed into the ground before it reached the base perimeter. "Negative impact on airfield. I see two missile batteries and an unknown number of railgun pits on the defense perimeter. Two tanks parked by the batteries."

"So they are not as uninformed as we would like. Send me coordinates of airfield. We must remove their air support element for Zim's plan to work."

Gaz used the mouse to ping the location on her minimap as her aircraft flew a screening pattern over the opposition's side of the map. "Coordinates sent."

Two of the new icons on the bottom of Gaz's HUD flashed and began countdown reset clocks lasting over five minutes. "Can you distract those batteries for thirty seconds?" Zim asked.

"Will do," was Gaz's response as she banked her fighter around and dove straight at the first missile battery. A targeting symbol lined up on the parked tank next to it, calculating a firing solution, and a steady tone sounded in her headset. Gaz fired an ATm and rolled up and away as another two missiles soared upward searching to connect with her aircraft.

A feminine computer voice sounded in her ears. "Paratrooper transport approaching drop zone." Gaz made a hard rolling bank, dodging one missile, then another. Two more missile threats blinked on her warning display. "Orbital strike zeroing in on target zone."

The Scout GEV's reached the base and must have been exchanged for APC's as two new streams of tracer fire began tracking Gaz's fighter. She jettisoned flares to spoof first one missile, then another. "It's getting really crowded up here, Zim! Completely defensive."

Just as she finished speaking, a series of red streaks began to rain from the sky onto the opposing airfield. After five seconds the VTOL Fighters began to explode. Then a large aircraft flew over Gaz's. It too reached the airfield and began dropping a quad of friendly NPC's onto the airstrip.

A string of rounds rang in Gaz's ears as they hit her fighter and a missile slammed home an instant later. The last missile was drawn off by another burst of flares. "Gaz, fall back to base and return in the bomber. Zim is now ranging on their perimeter."

Gaz broke off and rushed out of the zone on full afterburner as low to the ground as she could manage, maneuvering around hills. She passed Zim's Walker as it began punching out unguided missiles in a ballistic arc toward the enemy batteries. "I'm fine," she told Zim. He hadn't asked how she was holding up.

Naturally Zim misinterpreted the comment, since was a bit busy. "No, you were great. Zim would have been shot down immediately. You're on fire by the way. Make sure to select cruise missiles as your secondary ordinance package. Keep fragmentation bombs as primary."

The girl ejected over their base. The jet was badly damaged and there was no sense in saving it. She jumped into the larger Ground Attack Bomber and selected the new ordinance packages. During the delay countdown, she began to think that all these new features was serious overkill for five-man teams. No wonder the new title was _CWZ II: Online._ It would be enough for twenty man teams. But it did make Gaz smile. When it came to overkilling things, Zim was an expert. The smile disappeared when she remembered how that he could only be fully capable when riding in a Walker.

Zim examined his display. He was trading missile fire with the hostile batteries up ahead. His unguided missiles were more powerful and had area effect damage while the incoming ones were homing ATm's. They were much lighter and could be spoofed by his decoys, but he was running out of those. Gaz's voice spoke into his headset. "I'm back in the air, but this thing maneuvers like a pregnant yak. I hope I don't meet up with any of their fighters because this thing would be easy meat against their guns."

He checked his displays. "The opposition is stretched thin at the moment. Their fighters are still respawning and they are still trying to clear the area of the NPC's that dropped in. Can you lock your laser designator on these defense batteries and dump your cruise missiles onto them? I'm running out of decoys." Zim began to move forward once more.

Gaz reached over with one hand to the mouse and pointed a designator cursor onto the first target and pressed the launch button on her joystick with the other one. It was a bit awkward as the mouse and joystick were both on the right hand side. She would change that on the next game. "Missile one away. Two away."

The pair of large cruise missiles dropped from the circling bomber and dropped low over the terrain as they sought out the laser painted target. The missile battery exploded a moment later. The second vanished in a ball of fire eight seconds later. "All cruise missile expended." Gaz reported to Zim.

She watched as Zim moved in on the rest of the perimeter defenses, demolishing the unmanned railgun pits that were in PPG range as he walked through. Hostile tanks began to roll out to meet him. Zim continued to press forward in the Armored Walker, launching first ATm's and then opening up with PPG fire as the range fell.

Zim focused on one tank then another as they exploded. Gaz called out to him, "Enemy transport over head. Dropping paratroopers into their base as reinforcements."

"It does not matter. Gaz, fall back now." Another tank exploded as a another missile impacted his Walker along with more PPG fire. A warning alarm began blinking. Zim looked around his display as green energy fire began to fall from the sky. "Orbital strike. Zim is taking damage."

"Can you back away? Get out of the fire zone?" Gaz asked as her bomber flew away.

"Zim is moving forward. Be prepared to begin circling over the enemy base."

Zim moved forward once more. The Walker's armor was taking moderate damage, but the missile system would not last much longer. He toggled up the indirect fire computer system, rotated the torso as the Walker moved unstoppably forward, and launched two more rockets before the hostile missile batteries could respawn and intercept them. A last tank fired several more PPG blasts at Zim before it too exploded under a hail of PPG fire.

A bright flash of white light broke over the opponent's base, and two mushroom clouds rose up over the landscape. "Gaz-partner. Move in over the base courtyard and carpet bomb anything that spawns in."

"Understood. On the way."

Gaz's bomber flew over Zim's smoldering Walker and circled the base like a vulture. Four large bombs dropped from its belly. More explosions rocked the base and then Zim's blackened Walker stepped into the courtyard and opened up its four autocannons with their stupendous two hundred rounds per second.

With a spawn camping Armored Assault Walker blazing through their base and a heavy bomber circling overhead, the Simulated Posers wisely logged out.

Game Over screens popped up, and the two partners blinked their eyes, removing their headsets. The audience was applauding. It was probably a new record for the fastest a game was won during a Finals session.

Gaz reached back around her and patted Zim's arm. "You did good, Zim. That was real good. One game down, two to go. Ready to do it again?"

Zim turned around to look at Gaz and grinned.

* * *

The green dog hung on to the saddle that was strapped to the bucking pig yelling "Weeee hooooo!" as the pig tore across the fenced area of dirt before the crowd. The judges were flipping through their rule books. It seemed that there was no rule saying a dog could not ride a pig in a rodeo, and it seemed that dog was setting a record of some kind. No one really knew which record for it defied all reason, logic, and sanity to fit any category whatsoever, but he seemed to be doing very well. The other bulls in their pens were snorting, rooting for the pig of course.

* * *

The morning rounds were over, and so was the lunch break. The Crapola's, Crimson Shields, Drinking Buddies, Imbalanced Brainmeats and Simulated Posers had all been defeated by the Angry Housewives, Dragon's Fangs, Impending Doom, Proper Villains, and Razor Squadron.

Razor Bravo and Delta were hauling Alpha and Charlie over to some cots at the First Aid station. Echo was tailing the group. "You two just had to order the sushi, didn't you?" Echo asked. "Didn't I tell you that ordering raw fish from a hot dog stand was a bad idea?"

Alpha, clutching his stomach, left Bravo's supporting frame and kneeled over a garbage bin. Alpha and Charlie were then helped to some empty cots. Apparently there were others who had tried that particular sushi as well for more cots were filled with groaning people.

Delta looked at Bravo and Echo. "So what are we going to do now? We're down two men and the second stage of Finals will start soon."

Alpha leaned up and called a first aid attendant. "Excuse me? It seems that you've poisoned some of your final competitors, and our team is not that happy about your lapse of inspecting the vendors for public safety. So unless you want your sponsor to have to deal with the press after I make some phone calls…" he paused to throw up some more. "I suggest you get one of your officials over here. Now."

The attendant rushed off. "Sorry guys," Alpha told his teammates that were still standing. "I'll see what I can do to fix this." With that he began scanning the competition rules flyer.

* * *

Zim and Gaz were wondering around the convention center finishing their lunches when they heard the call over the loudspeakers. "Team Impending Doom. Please report to the main platform. Impending Doom to the Platform."

The pair just looked at each other as they made their way to the platform. An official and three young men wearing Razor Squadron uniforms were standing there. The official walked up to Zim and Gaz. "Impending Doom?" he inquired.

Gaz grunted an affirmative. It would not do to let Zim take the lead right now. His ability to even pretend to show respect for any Earth authority was at best non-existent. "What's this about?" she asked, ignoring the Razors.

"Well, one of our vendors inadvertently gave some of our visitors and contestants food poisoning. We're taking care of it of course, but two of our finalists were also effected. There are rules concerning substitutions, but the Razor's leader has 'suggested' a more convenient possibility. And less embarrassing for the sponsors. I'll leave you to discuss the matter, but should you come to terms it will have the convention's support." With that the official turned and walked away.

"Just what is this?" Zim demanded.

"Well," Echo began, scratching his neck. "We're down two guys and we don't want to forfeit and subbing in random people from other teams never works at this stage. You're under strength too. So we were thinking about joining forces. We thought being allied together would bring us both up to full strength."

"And why would we agree to this?" Gaz asked with some hostility. They were tough enough by themselves. "It's not like we need you."

"Oh, we know that. We ran across you early yesterday." Echo motioned to Zim. "Whirlwind took us all out in a few seconds for ganging up on you. Nuked Alpha and Charlie just to teach us a lesson. We've tried to keep an eye out for you two even since."

"Yeah," said Delta, "it's not hard to see he's military, black ops sort of thing."

"SPIES!" Zim pointed and shrieked in a hushed tone. "How DARE you try to learn ZIM's secrets! You will face the WRATH of…" Gaz slapped the side of Zim's head.

"Don't mind him," Gaz tried to explain. "He, uh…"

"Say no more." Echo waved is off. "After effect of wounds from an explosion or some snafu* that never happened, right?" He discreetly pointed to his own nose and ears, then wiggled his fingers.

Gaz's eyes widened as she realized that he was referring to Zim's Irken features. The lack of ears, nose and three fingered hands.

Echo's voice lowered to not draw attention, seeing that a set of brass knuckles had materialized in the Girl's hand. "We don't mean to intrude or anything, but he's needed reconstructive surgery, right?"

"Umm, right." Gaz replied. It wasn't everyday that a cover story for Zim fell into your lap. Then she couldn't help herself. "They had to take lots of shrapnel out of his brain too."

"Hey!" Zim protested, which earned a mild slug on the arm from Gaz. He scowled back in return.

"We even think your slogan is great," Bravo spoke up, trying to put the pair at ease. Getting into his service and injuries had obviously touched a nerve.

"Slogan?" Gaz asked.

"Yeah. It's been going around the convention. 'Sow The Wind, reap The Whirlwind.' Very clever. Some guy is even turning it into bumper stickers. Getting popular with the husbands."

Bravo continued. "Yep. We think its great how you, Wind, watch over your guy here and how Whirlwind is protective of you. Don't see many mutual partnerships like that anymore."

Neither Zim nor Gaz knew what they were talking about. It seemed the _Don't Mess With Gaz_ attitude had almost taken a life of its own. But that was fine with them.

"So, what do you two say? You may be able to win the whole thing by yourselves, but can you really say you couldn't use some backup?" Delta asked.

"Let me talk with my partner first," Gaz told the three men, and pulled Zim away.

"Zim is not happy with this development. Zim partners only with the Gaz-partner."

"Yeah, I know. But there are only two more rounds left, and with all the new options available, we'll be in serious trouble if the other side can secure the Walker before we can. Everyone has seen how we've done it so far, so it will be a challenge from now on."

"But Zim does not like teaming up with the humans!" the alien exclaimed.

"It can't be worse than the occasions when you've had to work with Dib."

Zim shivered, mumbling "The horror, the horror," like a drama queen.

"Plus I'm human, Zim, in case you've forgotten. And you've done more than team up with me. You've taken me in as your partner."

"Yes. Zim does forget, Gaz-partner."

Gaz's mind paused for a moment. "You what?"

Zim looked at her. "Zim has been forgetting that you are human."

Gaz looked her costume over. It wasn't _that_ good. Zim correctly ascertained what she was thinking. "When Zim looks at his Gaz-partner, he can no longer see a Gaz-human. Zim can now only see you as yourself. Species is a non-factor with you and only you."

Gaz couldn't help but give Zim a squeeze. This was a major step for Zim, not just in his perception but in actually admitting it out loud. "Thanks, Zim. Coming from you, that's probably the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me before."

The girl let Zim go before he could respond by trying to escape the momentary embrace. "So," she continued before Zim could say something stupid and ruin the moment, "we let these guys back us up?"

Zim just shook his head. "Very well, Gaz-partner. Zim agrees to this very temporary arrangement."

The two walked back over to the three Razors. "Fine," Gaz told them. "But there are some rules and things to keep in mind." The three men nodded. The green girl had an obvious command presence.

"One. We don't work for you. You're the ones backing us up. Two. Don't get in our way. Three. You come along with us at your own risk. He," motioning to the alien beside her, "does not always discriminate between friend and foe when he really gets going."

The three Razors looked at each other and came to a silent consensus. "I think we can live with that."

"Good. My name is Gaz. This is my partner Zim." The five took their seats, with Zim taking one on the end of the row beside Gaz, separating him from the unwanted humans.

Delta asked the new allies "So what's you're strategy? You've made it clear you want us to back up what ever it is you're doing."

"It's pretty simple from now on. Secure the Armored Walker and get Zim inside ASAP. After that we make it up on the fly."

Up on the platform teams Angry Housewives and Proper Villains were called up.

* * *

The round was nearly over and it looked like the Proper Villains would win. Alpha and Charlie had returned, but were still obviously in no shape to take part. Alpha leaned over and handed Gaz a card.

"Here. My family's home number is on the back. Most of us in the service know it can be difficult sometimes to watch after a soldier who's seen action. If you need someone to talk to feel free to call my wife anytime."

Gaz took the card not knowing what to say. These guys seemed to exist in a world of their own imagination.

The announcer walked back up to the platform as the previous contenders departed the stage. "And the winners are the Proper Villains. Next up will be unusual. Due to unavoidable circumstances we have two teams that are short a full squad. Therefore we will allow them to join up to form a single five-man squad. Therefore Team Dragon's Fang will be up against the joint teams of Impending Doom and Razor Squadron. All teams please come to the platform now."

The Dragon's Fang unit were dressed in all black jump suits with gold piping, and they were not looking happy. Not that they could rightly complain. After all, it was now five verses five.

Zim and Gaz took their customary places at the end of the U-shaped formation of computer systems for their squad. The three Razors took up the three middle positions. They checked over their controls and made adjustments.

"Wind confirms ready."

"Whirlwind confirms ready."

"Bravo standing by."

"Delta standing by."

"Echo standing by."

Gaz spoke into her microphone, "Team Impending Doom is ready and standing by."

The controller on the other end responded. "Understood. Impending Doom standing by." A few more seconds went by. "Team Dragon's Fang standing by. Start up in thirty seconds. Good hunting." With that the controller signed off.

Displays came to life and spawn timers counted down.

Gaz called it out. "Forest map. Possible villages. Echo with me on CAP. The rest will meet Zim at the Walker."

Clipped acknowledgements reported back. Five avatars spawned onto the cybernetic battlefield and all took off running. Gaz hopped into the nearest VTOL Fighter and took off immediately with Echo taking off after a few seconds having selected a modified ordinance package that included several AAm's along with the standard default selection. The two flew as fast as they could to cover the area around the Walker while the rest caught up.

Zim drove out on a Scout GEV followed by the slower Rocket Main Battle Tanks of Bravo and Delta. Gun MBT's had been left behind as the autocannons of the Walker could more than deal with any infantry they came across.

Gaz, having taken off first, was ahead of Echo and saw the Dragon fighters up ahead. "Two bandits bearing one-six-four. Looks like they have the same idea we do." She pushed forward on the throttlemaster, increasing the afterburners to full thrust.

"Understood," Echo said. "If you don't slow down, I can't cover your back when you reach their engagement range."

"Whatever. Just keep them busy."

Gaz raced out to the Dragon fighters. Two missile warnings flashed. Gaz rolled past one missile then slid over another as they passed head-on while she dropped flares the whole way. One enemy fighter passed beneath her while the second slowed down to open up with guns.

Gaz manipulated controls on her throttlemaster, shutting down the left side engine and swiveling the VTOL's primary jet exhaust ducts forward. The unbalanced forward thrust put the aircraft in a spin and the speed dropped. Tracer rounds swept past her canopy. As the nose of her aircraft came around, Gaz put a slight roll into the maneuver, bringing the wing's surface area against the simulated airflow. This dropped the airspeed dramatically as well as altitude as the fighter spun around faster.

Echo called out. "Two AAm's on Bandit one."

Gaz didn't say anything, her full concentration on her maneuver. She restarted the left engine, swung the thrust ducts back into position lighting the afterburners, and brought the nose of the fighter up. Two unguided air-to-ground fragmentation rockets dumbfired up from her aircraft as the second enemy plane passed overhead.

Rockets designed to damage or destroy opposing ground forces with high explosives for area effect rather than direct impact damage do not have a positive influence on the aerodynamic qualities of any aircraft they hit. There was no time to eject, and the surprised pilot was now respawning. In fact, the effected aircraft did not ever hit the ground. It was just gone.

Even through the insulation of her headset, Gaz could hear the crowd go wild.

"Dang, girl," Echo sputtered as he maneuvered his own fighter into an attack position against the first Dragon jet and fired the heavy autocannon. "I've been flying Harrier jump jets like these for a living, and I've never even heard of any maneuver as insane as that!" He fired a third missile.

Gaz mumbled a thanks as she swung the fighter around and boosted back toward Echo and the fist Dragon fighter. It was flying low and fast, dumping flares.

"Bandit one going down," Echo reported in. "I see a chute. Target is on the ground."

"Zim is still thirty seconds out."

"Looks like he's going to get the Walker first," Echo continued, trying to get a bead on the speck of a figure down below.

"Oh, no he's not!" declared Gaz. She hit a button and ejected from her aircraft. As the parachute opened and stabilized, she swung out her sniper rife and found the figure running toward the Walker. She switched to scope view took a steady aim and fired.

The player did not enter the Walker, and began his respawn cycle.

As Gaz landed with Echo circling up over head on CAP, she could hear the crowd chanting "Wind! Wind!" She ran for the Walker.

Zim's voice sounded in her headset. "Zim is glad his Gaz-partner has finally shown them how much she can shine."

Gaz began to blush. Over the past two days Zim had several opportunities to strut his stuff. But he was glad she could now have her moment to shine in front of everyone. Gaz entered the Walker for the first time. "Walker is secure. Moving to you now, Zim."

The Walker began to move with Echo providing air cover overhead. Zim drove up in his Scout with Bravo and Delta's tanks coming into sight. Zim entered into the Walker.

"I can take the Scout back to base for another vehicle," Gaz volunteered.

"Gaz-partner, stay. We probably won't get an opportunity like this again."

"Stay? To do what?"

"Drive for Zim," the alien nearly cooed.

Navigation, missile decoys, electronic warfare systems, and a host of advanced system displays came alive as the Walker switched to dual-pilot mode under Gaz's fingers.

Over at Zim's station, the alien's PAK functions surged as it often did at times like this. Zim was no longer conscious of the control interfaces of the joystick, throttle and the rest. They were as an extension of his own limbs. Controlling the Walker was as natural as moving his own body.

As a Dragon armor column crested a hill and into view, Zim activated advanced ECM modules, and several false sighting reports pinged on the opponent's minimaps.

Gaz moved the armored monstrosity forward as Zim brought up every tactical system available. Enemy fired unguided missiles at their position. As missiles flew at them and Gaz charged the unit forward, Zim raised the weapon arms up and the autocannons began to fire. Incoming missiles began to explode as they were shot down.

For the first time in CWZ history, the Armored Assault Walker began to function at it's full potential. For Zim and Gaz, it was like a twisted version of heaven.

While Gaz dodged missile fire and called out targets for Zim to engage with ATm's, PPG fire, and then autocannons as the range closed through medium, short, then to point-blank, the three Razors followed at a distance watching in awe as the Doom Team ripped the armor column to shreds. Bravo covered his microphone with his hand and spoke quietly to his comrades. "Guys, we had _no_ idea. When they said they didn't need us, they really meant it as an _understatement."_

* * *

They left the stage with the crowd cheering. Zim gave Gaz a puzzled look while onlookers nearby hollered out various forms of "way to go!" She moved closer to him so she could hear.

"Zim does not understand this crowd."

She leaned closer to direct her voice to his antennae, which were nearly curled back around his head due to the noise. "They are amazed at us. Me and you. They appreciate what we have displayed. They respect and value what it means. Our performance inspires them to make a big show of it like this."

Zim looked intently into Gaz's eyes as they walked to their seats and a single tear crawled down his cheek. Somehow Gaz knew what was happening. On some level, Zim was trying very hard right now to not realize something. Something like the difference between how this crowd was receiving him and his one accomplishment, even though it wasn't technically real, and those of his own people with all his accomplishments and abilities based in reality. Another crack opened in the heart of Gaz Membrane.

So Gaz gave him her support. With a warm smile, she wrapped around him one comforting arm and held his hand with her other hand. When they reached their seats she let go, for Zim could always compose himself very quickly. That ego of his helped. Or perhaps it was more of a defense mechanism.

The announcer eventually quieted the audience. "Gamers and Gamies. That was very exciting wasn't it? The final round is next. There will be a fifteen minute break. Thank you."

"Zim? I'm going to head to the ladies room," Gaz informed her alien. "It's almost over and I don't want to fight the crowds when everyone else is getting ready for the flight home."

"Zim will provide you with an escort."

The two headed away. Once they were out of earshot, Bravo turned to Delta. "Still think they're twins?"

"Uh, is it too late to change my bet?" Delta asked. Echo laughed.

* * *

It took nearly ten minutes for the line to the ladies room to crawl forward. Once inside, Gaz did her business, and then washed her hands in the sink. As she dried off her hands and checked herself in the mirror, she felt a weight shift in her pocket. Gaz reached down and pulled it out.

Two Irken slave collars. At least she hadn't dropped them somewhere on the convention center floor during the day.

A lady next to her saw them and exclaimed "Oh! Those look so nice. So exquisite!"

"Yeah, I guess. A friend lent them to me, and I'm trying to remember to give them back."

"A special friend I take it, to even lend anyone something like those."

Gaz didn't comment on what kind of special Zim was. He was a category all of his own, but special all right. Special as an idiot. Special as a klutz. Special as a protector. Special as a friend. Special as a partner. Special as…

"I mean just look at those gems! Are they real?"

The lady's comment drew her attention to the gem-like features, which she hadn't paid attention to before. One was green, the other was red. A red so deep it was almost purple.

"I like the purple one. Kind of goes with your hair. Perhaps you can trace the design and have a jeweler make another one." With that the lady left.

Gaz put the green collar back in her pocket, looking at the purple one. The black metal was woven into a near wicker look made up of bands much wider than ordinary thread, but still looking delicate. It looked like it was meant to circle around the neck and form a V near the two collarbones of a human. In the V was the gem-like sphere.

It actually looked decent, and perhaps she could have someone duplicate its appearance. Gaz held it up with two hands to hold the front of the wide necklace up to her neck, careful not to actually put it around herself. She was just curious to see if it would be a good look to invest in later.

Actually, it did seem to go well with her hair, and even matched her skull necklace in some fashion.

Of course Gaz did not know that the color codes meant something important. Green meant the safety was on. That deep red meant the collar was armed and dialed in with a specific DNA code.

The two ends snapped around her neck on their own and linked with an audible CLICK. Gaz felt heat at the clasps, not enough touching her skin to burn fortunately, and the smell of fusing metal filtered into the air around her head.

Gaz's eyes were the size of dinner plates, and she couldn't help but think some rather bad words in her head.

There was an Irken slave collar permanently fastened around her neck. Gaz tried not to panic. _Zim would not see me as a slave. I'm too much his partner now. He sees me as myself, not what species I am. I'm important to him. He would help find a way to remove it. Right?_

Gaz shook her head to clear her thoughts. First things first, the competition. After that they could take care of this. And if Zim wasn't motivated enough, Gaz was very good at motivating people. She tucked the collar around her neck into her uniform, hiding it from view and walked back out into the convention center.

* * *

Back at the base, Computer guarded Zim's place against nobody. No one wanted in. Seemed like everyone, including Dib, was on some sort of vacation. It was boring.

Then a signal came in. _Well, this is a surprise,_ the computer thought. It looked up relevant codes in the archives. It hadn't heard of anything like this in a long time. It found the correct forms. The other end of the paperwork would take some doing, a challenge, but not impossible. The computer hadn't had a challenge in a while.

It filled out the Irken forms, got them ready to send off, and sent out a few emails with other forms. This would take over an hour, even for the computer, but the internet was such an amazing tool. You could get just about anything done on it nowadays. An email was sent out. But there was one thing it could not do on its own. Computer did not have an actual body after all. A satellite communication channel was opened and detailed instructions relayed.

* * *

Gir stood still as he received his instructions. This was important. The most important ones he had ever been given. Even he knew he needed to not fail in this task. He turned to his new pig friend. "Sorry, piggy. Gir has to go take care of an important errand for master."

Pig grunted, and Gir gave him a big hug. "Don't be sad. This will make master soooooo happy!"

Gir turned to look over his shoulder at pig as he ran away as fast as he could. "Be sure not to be bacon!" he called back.

Pig grunted his promise, then hightailed it for the petting zoo. He would be safe there. And fed. Fed so much.

It took twenty minutes, as they had been on the outskirts of the city, but he eventually found the right kind of vending machine. It wasn't too difficult to actually locate one, they were virtually everywhere in this city. The robot still in his dog disguise inserted a five hundred dollar chip into the slot, and retrieved the item.

Gir took off once again to await his master by the Voot Cruiser.

* * *

They had won the first two games against the Proper Villains, but at the beginning of the third they had launched all their aircraft in an unanticipated maneuver and disabled the Walker before Doom and the Razors could finish securing the area. It had been a jungle map as well, and the Proper Villains had settled into a guerilla warfare style campaign with only infantry. It had been a seesaw of ambush and counter-ambush for nearly thirty minutes before the game timer finally ended with the Villains in the lead by two player kills.

Zim leaned back to speak to Gaz, covering his microphone with his hand. "Gaz-partner, are you alright? You seem distracted."

Gaz only stared at her blank displays, but her hand automatically went up to that infernal collar hidden under her uniform. "Yeah, I'm okay. It's just been a long day." Now was not the time to openly discuss other things.

A tone chimed on her wristwatch. _Who would be calling now of all times?_ she asked herself. Gaz pressed a button, and Professor Membrane appeared on the display.

"Dad?"

"Daughter! I just heard the news. Congratulations! My girl is so grown up, almost out of college…"

"Hi-skool, Da-"

"and of course you have my permission," he interrupted, not listening. "The paperwork is already sent out. And when you are ready I've got a nice job here at the lab as head of security. If only your brother would gain his sanity and turn to REAL SCIENCE! He could have a good position here too. When I get back home you'll have to tell me all about it. I should be back in two…"

An explosion flashed a bright light into the display. "…make that four months. Good-bye daughter!" And the display blanked back to show the time.

Delta, seated next to her had been watching. "That was your dad?" he asked.

Gas just nodded, torn between wanting to scratch her head in puzzlement, cry, or just mace something really good.

"Your dad is Professor Membrane? Your Gaz Membrane? Wow, he's like famous and everything. What's it like having him for a dad?"

Gaz's head snapped around to fix him with a look that inspired unpleasant feelings, even in a Royal Marine from England. "You probably have a better idea than I do," was all she said in a near snarl.

"Uh, right," was all Delta had the courage to say. Sometimes it was safer to mind your own business.

The controller came on over their headsets. "Game initializing. Startup in thirty seconds. Control logging out."

The two teams waited together. They were not happy about losing the last game, and Gaz in particular was very, very not happy. At least she had finally gotten her father's permission to come to the convention. It was almost over, but at least her dad had given her that much.

Displays flickered to life. An urban environment. Zim grinned. Everyone else groaned. The spawn timer counted down.

Everyone had the same thought. _This is it._

Well, everyone except Zim. Because Zim just had to be different.

"Spawn in as Heavy Infantry or Snipers. All units go for full air strike, maximum firepower," Zim ordered.

Confused confirmation was relayed back. The requested ordinance packages would delay their takeoffs, and they needed to race the Proper Villains to the Walker ASAP.

They spawned in and the five avatars raced to the airfield.

Zim and Bravo jumped into the two Ground Attack Bombers and loaded up cruise missiles for both primary and secondary weapon racks. The rest hopped in the VTOL Fighters and selected double rocket pods.

"Are you sure about this, Zim?" Gaz asked what everyone was thinking.

"Yes, Zim has a plan. No time to discuss."

The fighters took off first, then a few seconds later by the bombers. They formed up in a loose formation with the fighters in the lead, and flew toward the Walker.

Echo the fighter jock was in the lead plane. "I see them, just like last time. Heavy airstrike group. Primary targets?"

"Your primary target is the Walker," Zim coolly instructed.

"WHAT?" They all gasped. Gaz was the first to recover. She was used to Zim being, well, Zim after all. "Uh, Zim, the other side is targeting the Walker to cripple it, remember?"

"Yes they are. And like last time they will have snipers to pick off any engineer that tries to repair it. Instead we are going to help them destroy it completely."

"It will take fifteen minutes for it to respawn," Bravo reminded everybody.

"And when it does, I will be directly underneath," Zim replied. He sent instructions to his PAK setting a timer for fifteen minutes with two and one minute warnings.

"I hope you know what you're doing," Bravo said in the other bomber. The other side was nearing engagement range. "Cruise missiles in range."

"Hold fire until the fighters open up. Bombers remain at standoff range. Bring up your laser designators," Zim commanded.

Laser targeting systems began painting the Walker.

The bombers of the Proper Villains fired cruise missiles. All four impacted. Another four launched. Then their three fighters began firing unguided rockets two at a time.

Then Echo and the fighter element entered missile range. They were carrying double of the weapons types the other side was firing into the Walker. Twelve rockets fired at once, then a half a second later eight cruise missiles, then eight more. The bombers were empty and headed back to base. Twelve more unguided rockets fired from the fighters.

The massive salvo of their first twenty missiles slammed into the Walker, which was already under more precise rocket fire from the Villains aircraft. They just wanted it crippled after all. Then in the next four seconds the second volley of twenty missiles hit. Then another twelve two seconds after that. In six seconds the unmanned Walker was hit by fifty two missiles just from Teams Doom/Razor.

As you would expect the Walker went up in a giant explosion. The Villains were taken by surprise. Fighters from both sides turned to engage with guns in a confused, disorganized and brutal dogfight. Zim had watched the Walker go up and started his PAK's countdown. He hopped out of the bomber in his Heavy Infantry rig and took off for a Scout GEV with Bravo.

The fighting quickly turned into a building-to-building search-and-engage sort of brawl. Urban environments were really ugly places to place a battlefield. There were so many windows and hiding places to shoot from. Heavy casualties mounted, even friendly fire cases on both sides as players had only a split second from sighting another player entering a room suddenly and recognizing them as friend or foe. Trigger fingers on infantry versions of the Gauss Autocannon, with its 50 rounds per second, were much quicker than brains. However, only one player had a PAK with a countdown timer feature.

* * *

Gaz was pinned down in the city park by a sniper. Her avatar was crouching behind a boulder. All around her was open space. "I'm pinned down in the park at golf-four. Request assistance."

They were scattered all over the cityscape. One by one the Razors confirmed they were too far away and also under heavy fire.

One voice however was different. "Zim is on the way. Give location of sniper."

Gaz pinged the location of the building on the minimap. "Okay, this building. Fifth floor, third window from the left looking south."

"Understood. What is your range to the building?"

"Five hundred sixty yards. Why?"

Gaz could hear the grin in Zim's voice. "No reason. Take a position behind the rock bearing two-nine-zero. You have six seconds to comply."

The girl changed positions quickly, earning another sniper shot ringing against her boulder.

Zim came into range, came around a corner to get a clear shot and fired.

* * *

Villain Green crouched in the window to take another shot at the pinned sniper below. It was like shooting fish in a barrel with a cannon. It was only a matter of time until this _Wind_ broke and ran for it. Villain Black was approaching from the left side in a blind alley to the front of _Wind._ Then they could move on to other prey. These opponents were tough, and smart. But the Villains were holding. If they just kept doing this sort of fight they could win.

Movement caught his eye and he moved his scope over to see what it was quickly. He didn't want to lose sight of _Wind_ for long. In his scope he saw for a spit second a very large missile fill his vision and his whole one hundred eighty degree display system went white. Then a respawn timer counted down. Below was a message scrolling at the bottom informing him how his avatar had met it's fate.

_Villain Green destroyed by a head shot with Tactical Nuke 1 from Whirlwind._

* * *

Gaz's screen flashed white, but her character was saved from the splash damage by the boulder. The whole area was flattened. "You _nuked_ a single sniper?"

"In the face. Oh yes, do not mess with Gaz-partner."

The Razors just chuckled to themselves. _Reap the Whirlwind _just took on a whole new level of meaning, and the entire audience could see as it played out on the big screens.

Gaz just watched as Zim's newly respawned Walker came into view, blasting everything in sight with it's twin Phased Plasma Guns. As energy weapons, they didn't run out of ammo. And one of the new things about _CWZ II: Online _Zim had learned was that many obstacles such as trees and buildings could now be effected by heavy weapons or demolition charges.

Gaz ran under Zim's Walker as he walked around the town. If an opponent took a shot, Zim didn't look for location of the sniper. He just opened up his PPG's and blew out the bottom floor of the whole building he was in. And being on a top floor of a collapsing building was unhealthy. Being in the lower floors was much worse.

If an opponent didn't take a shot, Zim blasted the building anyway. If there was no one in the building, well Gaz would have some place to snipe from. Unless Zim chose not to take chances. He did like to be thorough.

The cityscape was quickly being demolished one block at a time. The Razors quickly joined in with their own Gun MBT's. Now a swath three city blocks wide was being blasted to rubble as they made their sweep. This was just too much fun.

Unless you were a Villain. They couldn't retreat to their base and try to hold a defensive line either. Not with one nuke left in that cursed Walker.

Even with another ten minutes of stiff resistance to go, the result was not in doubt. That last nuke was going to be used on somebody.

* * *

They had said their goodbyes to Razor Squadron, had their picture taken for posterity, showered with congratulations by the crowds, and Gaz received their fruitcake prize. The two were now walking back to the Voot Cruiser.

"Thank you, Zim. For everything you've done." Gaz tucked her arm into Zim's as they walked together into the parking garage.

"It has been a pleasure for Zim. Zim hopes there will be a next project very soon."

"You mean that?"

"Of course. Just because we have completed our conquest here does not mean Zim no longer wishes to be a partner with Gaz."

Gaz didn't know what to say, but she felt the same. "Well, my Gaming Den is still under your base, so I'll still be around quite a bit I think."

"Yes. This is pleasing to Zim."

Both of them were very happy at that moment, but Gaz also had reason to be apprehensive. She didn't want to wreck things, not this moment. But as the front of the Voot Cruiser came into view, she couldn't put it off any longer. Gaz took a deep breath as Gir opened the Cruiser's canopy and stepped out.

"Zim, I have a bit of a problem I need your help with. Some trouble really."

Zim stopped in his tracks and looked at Gaz with concern. "That does not sound pleasing at this moment. What is this trouble?"

"Don't laugh or be angry," she warned. Gaz pulled the collar around her neck from under her uniform and into view.

Zim didn't react at first. Then he began to snicker. "I said don't laugh, Zim. Now get it off me. Right now!"

The alien waved her off. Gaz was now starting to get angry. "Zim warned the Gaz-partner that the collar cannot be removed once the clasps are fused. Not without fatally damaging you."

"I don't care. Find a way. Get this slave collar off me now, Zim."

Zim laughed harder. "Slave collar?" he tried to get out.

Gir handed Gaz a piece of paper and a pen. It looked official. Probably from the convention, but Gaz was not in the mood, and a bit preoccupied at the moment to read it. She just signed it at the indicated place and thrust it back at Gir.

"Dang it, Zim!" Gaz was rapidly losing her cool and going into doom mode. "I am NOT your SLAVE!"

"No, no your not. Never." was Zim's reply as he collapsed to the ground holding his sides. He signed the paper Gir thrust at him without looking as was his habit and returned it.

"Well, if you aren't motivated enough, I will make you," Gaz threatened. She stepped forward, pulling the second collar out of her pocket.

Zim stopped laughing. He was still on the ground. "Gaz, what are you-" he suddenly found himself with a mouthful of collar.

"Eat it, Zim. Eat it good," Gaz growled. She was past thinking at this point. Right now all she understood was that non-compliance brought doom.

DNA analyzers did not care if the sample was of blood or saliva. It just needed a source. The green sphere in the collar turned deep red.

The collar was pulled from the alien's mouth. His eyes went wide as they tracked that gem-like sphere. "Gaz-partner! Be careful! It's armed!" he tried to warn her.

But she wasn't listening to anything right now. Nor was she watching Gir slip something into a scanning slot in the computer system of the Voot Cruiser.

Gaz loomed over Zim in full doom mode. She slammed that collar down on Zim as he watched in shock. When he had obtained those collars, he was just looking for a tracking system. He never imagined this would happen!

The two ends snapped around his neck and the scent of fused metal drifted into the air. Gaz pulled Zim upright and released him. Zim's eyes went wide as the sphere in Gaz's collar flashed to a clear white.

"There. Now you're my slave too. So now you have to get these things off," Gaz declared.

Zim collapsed back down, sitting with his back up against the Voot Cruiser. "You don't understand anything! They aren't slave collars. They aren't even Irken! They're from Judgementia!"

This brought Gaz back to her senses. Somehow she had the feeling she had just made a grave miscalculation. She looked at Zim as he held his head in his hands. He looked very lost in this new predicament.

Gaz knelt down before Zim. "Zim, I'm sorry. I panicked, and have been holding it in for a couple of hours. I just lost it." She looked at Zim's collar. The gem was white. Not green or deep red.

The gun cameras on the Voot Cruiser had been recording the entire episode.

"Zim, talk to me. I'm realizing I just did something stupid."

"You THINK!" Zim nearly yelled. He was really upset. Or in shock. It was hard to tell the difference.

"Zim, please. What are these, really?"

Zim let out a breath of what could almost be described as surrender. "They're from Judgmentia. Even Irk abides by their legal rulings."

Gaz started to get a bad vibe about where this was going.

"These aren't slave collars. They are _bonding_ necklaces."

"You mean, as in prisoners?" Gaz asked, perhaps in hope.

Zim gave out a cut off laugh, lacking humor. "Not bondage. Bond_ing._ And the white indicates the final step in the process. We've been registered in the official records back home."

Gaz was not understanding. Or maybe she didn't want to at this point. But whatever it was, it didn't matter here on Earth. It wasn't part of the galactic community. Right? But there was something else.

"Gir!" she commanded.

Gir rushed forward in his dog costume and stood before Gaz at attention, saluting. His were eyes red. "Yes, Mistress! I obey!"

_Great. Now he's doing it too!_ she thought. The robots eyes beneath the costume eyes faded back to blue. "Gir, what did you do with that official looking paper?"

"I scanned it for Computer, just like he asked. It has been transmitted to the proper clerks. I just finished framing it between armorglass. See! Isn't it purrdy?"

Gaz took the framed item and looked at it. She let out a final gasp and nearly dropped it. But instead she collapsed next to Zim. It was official all right, but not what she had assumed.

* * *

_**State of Nevada**_

_Recognizes this_

_**License of Marriage**_

_between_

Zim Membrane and Gaz Membrane

* * *

Zim just looked at her with blank eyes. He looked like he was in shock. Gaz knew the feeling.

"Zim," Gaz wearily requested. "Please tell me we did not just elope."

* * *

* SNAFU = Situation Normal: All Fouled Up.

A/N: And so ends phase two of _Don't Leave Me. _The next chapter will begin phase three and the pace of the story should pick up from here. This point is where I have been aiming at since before chapter 1. If you go back to the story summary, this is what I was talking about!

Yes, I realize I don't know what an actual License looks like. I had to imagine one. Just go with it.


	14. Chapter 13

A/N: The reviews are just awesome guys! Your reviews and comments are the honey that keeps me going. Getting to the last chapter was a lot of hard work, so I'm glad you loved it so much. It makes it all worthwhile.

Thanks to: Madiphan99, Kazehana23, FanFicNewb, LittleEnglishLass, Zerg170, memmek10k, Kaylee Or Something, InfiniteReader, crazyanimefreak15, MojaveRuler151, Halfinsane-HalfMental, and LyraRayne.

So far we have completed Phase 1: Preparation and Phase 2: The Event. Now begins Phase 3: Shock. I have decided that the theme song for this chapter is "Silent Lucidity" by Queensryche. If this were a TV show or movie, this is the song that would be playing in the last scene of the chapter where Gaz wakes up. It's just too perfect.

Yes, there is going to be OOC. This seems understandable as our characters are in way over their heads in things they are not ready to deal with. Often times the hardest person to be honest with is yourself, and Zim and Gaz haven't been as it would be too uncomfortable. Now they may have no choice. Also "Bases R Us" was taken from another fanfic. Can't remember where. Please tell me if you know.

* * *

"Zim," Gaz wearily requested. "Please tell me we did not just elope."

The alien seated next to her on the floor of the parking garage in front of the Voot Cruiser said nothing. He sat there holding his head in his hands, unable to say anything.

Gaz got up and began pacing back and forth, swearing for five minutes straight. When she had imagined winning the CWZ competition, never in her most demented dreams would she have imagined that she'd walk away with a new invader husband as the prize!

The girl kept this up until Gir started to join in the 'swearing song.' "Gir!" she yelled at the singing and dancing robot in the dog disguise.

"Yes, Mistress Gazzy?" Gir asked. He didn't stop dancing.

"Stop swearing!"

"But I'm soooo happy for my Mistress and Master!" the crazy robot exclaimed. He stopped dancing and rushed over to hug the green girl's legs. "Are you my Mommy now?"

Gaz's hand met her face. _This just keeps getting better and better,_ she thought.

"Gir!" Zim yelled at the robot. "You are not a smeet! You are Irken military hardware. You don't have parents! Why should you get parents when not even the MIGHTY ZIM got any?"

Gaz began shaking her head as well now. Trust Zim to come up with self-centered logic like that.

"Okay," was Gir's only response. He walked off behind the Voot Cruiser and opened the trunk.

Gaz walked back over and sat back down on the ground next to Zim. They had calmed down a little bit from the initial shock, and stared at their marriage license that was still in her hands. "I'm not ready for anything like this, Zim," she said in a small voice. "I'm not ready for that kind of life yet. I've barely been interested in having friends, let alone some human boyfriend. I mean they are all morons. Yet here I am…" she couldn't call Zim what he now was. "married outside my own species. We aren't even out of hi-skool yet."

"Zim is in over his head as well. We Invaders aren't even supposed to bond with others in this manner. Zim has not had the training or education for this nor was Zim even supposed to bond at all, being on a mission. Yet here Zim is take by surprise and now officially bonded to a member of the species he was supposed to conquer."

Gaz had not thought about that part, being overwhelmed with her own swirling thoughts. She thought that for Zim it must be like a Mafia hitman finding the family he was contracted to exterminate, and then finding himself married in to it. _What am I thinking?_ she asked herself. _That's exactly what just happened._ The consequences could be severe for Zim.

Gir came back around, carrying a suitcase. He reached inside and began tossing around bundles of money. "Master! Mistress! Look at me!" he cried out in joy as he spun around tossing out clumps of cash. "I'm the flower girl!"

There were so many things wrong with this picture. "Gir!" Zim yelled at the robot again. "Those are not flowers, and you are not a girl! Stop that this instant."

"Okay." The robot called back. He returned to the back of the Cruiser and came back lugging five more suitcases. "Here's your bonding present, from your favorite Gir." Each suitcase contained more bundles of money. A lot of money.

"Gir, tell me you did not rob a casino," Zim pleaded.

"I didn't steal. I walked into several fancy buildings with lots of fun games, and these nice people kept giving me these pretty disks. Then when I left they asked me to 'cash in' and gave me these suitcases."

Gaz shook her head. A computer, even one like the one Gir had built in, playing games of statistical probability. "He didn't rob one, Zim. He robbed all of them."

She looked at the cases. It looked like they contained a few million easy. Well, at least they were financially secure, not that Zim cared about that sort of thing. Especially when it came to human wealth. So half of that was Gaz's unless one were to go with the unwritten rule known by every wife of Earth, then _all_ of it was her's…No! she couldn't let herself go down that road.

"Zim, I hope you are fit enough to fly us home, because I have a feeling we should leave now."

* * *

On the flight home, her mind spun trying to find a loophole or some technicality that would get them out of this mess. She didn't know about Judgementia regulations, but maybe…

"Zim," she said. "I only just turned seventeen last month, so I'm still technically underage. Any contract like this I sign isn't binding without parental…Oh crap, please tell me he didn't…" Gaz just remembered something.

"What is it?" Zim asked, at last turning his head to face her.

"Just before our last game my Dad called me to offer his congratulations and said he sent in the paperwork. I thought he was talking about the contest, but he wasn't. I just know he signed a parental consent form. What about you? What's you're 'age' where Earth is officially concerned?"

"Eighteen, three months ago."

"So I guess getting this voided on a technicality is out," Gas commented, gesturing to the license she was still holding. Then she realized something else. "Zim, when my Dad called to offer his congratulations, he gave us his _blessing._ That means from now on he'll expect us to be an actual _couple."_

She held her head in her hands as Zim flew the ship. "We are screwed in three different directions, aren't we, Zim?"

Zim didn't say anything for a moment. "Gaz-… Zim doesn't even know how to address you anymore. If I call you by what you are entitled to, being an official bondmate, you might end Zim's life functions."

Gaz considered this for an uncomfortable moment, hands clasped together. "Partner is fine, Zim. It's what we have been and hope we still are. Even if it's meaning is ambiguous right now."

"Gaz-partner," Zim continued. "Computer can probably hack into human databases and erase records, assuming Judgementian legal codes let him which I doubt. Otherwise it would not have gone to these lengths. Zim may be able to break in and remove hard copies of documents, and tamper with memories as well. But there will always be some trace that won't be found, and evidence of tampering. However the risk is moot where Irken law is concerned. If we cannot deal with that part of our problem, the rest is irrelevant."

Zim paused for a few moments, then fingered the necklace around his own neck. His voice lowered. "Even if we can get this all straightened out, we'll both be wearing these for the rest of our lives."

They flew on in silence for a few minutes more. Gaz thought about what Zim had said about tampering. It felt wrong somehow. Just erasing the evidence wouldn't change what the two of them now were. So she let it drop, and fingered her own necklace. "Zim, I take it these things have some sort of anti-tampering counter-measure?"

"If there is an attempt to remove them while the wearer is conscious, the metallic bands will constrict, cutting off one's air supply until the tampering ceases. If while unconscious, it will signal a short-range distress beacon to summon authorities, not that any on Earth would recognize any such signal."

"That seems rather extreme," said Gaz with distaste.

"On Judgementia, this form of bonding is for life and is enforced," Zim informed her.

"And Irkens abide by this just because someone on Judgementia says so? Whatever happened to the whole 'Irken conquering the galaxy and impose our whims on everybody else' thing?" she asked with a shade of scorn in her voice.

"Irken bonding is a very rare thing, almost unheard of, and not easily done. But if it did happen, life-long bonding is encoded in our DNA. It can not be any other way for us, so there has never been a problem before," Zim said, wishing the uncomfortable subject would end. Proper Irkens did not just talk about these things. But he was officially bonded to Gaz, who needed understand these things to a degree.

"Oh," was her only response. There was long pause. "Zim? What were you doing with these bonding necklaces anyway?" Another awkward moment passed. "We're you, um, looking for…?"

"NO!" Zim nearly shouted. He was so far out of his area of expertise, comfort zone and even basic understanding. "Invaders need no one!" The alien took a deep breath. "But Zim is on the tail end of the Irken supply chain. Parts can sometimes be difficult to get as other sectors can have higher priority at times. Sometimes Zim has to improvise."

"I understand." Gaz said, and she did. His people were not about to supply Zim enough to let him actually succeed in his mission to conquer Earth. They wanted him to stay far, far away.

There was a long silence in the Voot Cruiser's cockpit.

"Zim?"

"Yes, Gaz-partner?"

"How bad could it get? With your people, I mean?" the girl asked.

Zim though for almost a full minute before replying. "Zim does not know. There has never been something like this before. No Irken, let alone an Invader has… gotten involved beyond his own species until now. At the very least they could strip Zim of his title of Invader. Zim could be recalled and put in a public cage as a warning to any deviants. They could do that to us _both_ for the zoo's freak show. They could even put Zim on trial as a traitor and dump him into a star."

_And they have been looking for a means to finally get rid of Zim once and for all. I just have given them the ammunition to do it too. I hope they are too stupid to realize it,_ Gaz thought as the Voot Cruiser sailed in the night sky.

"Zim, why aren't you still furious with me? You should be."

Zim thought for awhile before answering. "Zim has had some time to think. He did not tell you what these were," fingering his necklace. "Your response was rather Invader-like and understandable given the erroneous assumptions Zim never corrected. Zim could also have stopped you with force, but was too surprised, and could not damage his important Gaz-partner anyhow. Zim is still in shock as well, and does not know _how_ to respond. Therefore Zim must contact his Tallest for assistance."

"NO!" Gaz cried out. "Don't, please Zim." She paused. Somehow she had to convince him not to talk to his leaders. "We don't have to. We can pretend this never happened. No one needs to know. I'll stay legally married to you, Zim. It can be our secret. I'll… I'll be your… your legal wife and we can just ignore this. We can just go back to our lives like nothing happened."

Zim looked at her with a very confused and bewildered expression. Gaz was making no sense, almost sounding hysterical, which was very unlike her. "Gaz-partner, take a deep breath. Isn't that what you are supposed to do when stressed like this?" She nodded and took several deep breaths. "Gaz-partner, can you look back on the past two weeks and say that we have not already changed? Can you say we will not change more and without notice? Besides you are not a pretender, Gaz-partner. It is not in your nature. How long could you really keep everything bottled up without anyone taking note of it, or just reaching a point where you explode? Besides, we're in the official records in three different star systems. How do you think it will look to the Tallest if we tried in vain to cover this up?"

Gaz knew the answer to these questions, and very much wished those answers were otherwise. She also knew what Zim did not say. Zim was blindly loyal, faithful and dedicated to his Tallest. He could not turn aside from his obligation.

"Okay, Zim. You have to do what you have to do. But I'll be there with you, and tell them it was all my fault because I didn't realize what I was doing."

Zim pushed the Voot Cruiser's nose down for the second half of their suborbital flight. "Not before you wash all that off," he said pointing to her green skin. "They might not see our situation for what it is as the Tallest do not always give Zim their full attention. You would not want them to approve of this bond because they didn't see through your disguise, would you?"

Gaz couldn't help but think that would be preferable to what the Tallest could have in store for Zim. "I just don't want to see anything bad happen to you, Zim. However it came about, you've become important to me. And you are family now. For the first time in my whole life I've gained family instead of lost. I can't lose what little of it I have left."

She spent the rest of the trip in worried silence, for deep down she knew the truth of those words. She hadn't been paying attention and the alien had somehow snuck deeper into her heart and she was now in way over her head.

Zim also flew the ship in silence. He remembered from his examination of Gaz's diary what this meant. He didn't have the mental framework to understand the human concepts of what he had gained, and had never had the experience either to form even a basic understanding. But Zim also knew the truthfulness of her words. _You have become important to me too, Gaz-partner. Zim will do his best to keep you from that hurt._

* * *

Zim parked the Voot Cruiser outside the Membrane home and Gaz hopped out. "I'll be back out in ten minutes, Zim," she told him. "Just wait here, okay?"

Zim gave out a sigh. "Very well, but try to hurry. If the Tallest find out before I can contact them…" The alien let the sentence drop off, and Gaz turned to hurry into the Membrane house.

There was no one home, just a note saying Dib was out in the forest searching a potential jackalope den. At least _that_ problem could be delayed for awhile. She wasn't sure if she would have to break his jaw so that it could be wired shut, just so Gaz wouldn't have to hear the endless stream of outbursts or not. She had enough to deal with as it was. But it would be interesting to see which would shock Dib more: hearing that Zim was now legally married to his sister, or that Zim was now Dib's brother-in-law.

Gaz got her change of clothes, the dress, tights and boots then transferred pocket contents. She removed the contact lenses in her eyes and jumped into the shower, using the special gel Zim had given her to wash out the skin dye and dissolve the fake antennae. It was an odd sensation, not just the cleansing gel but wearing a thick bonding necklace in the shower. When she dried herself off with a towel, she put on her everyday outfit and put the skull necklace back on, it hung a couple of inches below her bonding necklace now.

Once she was decent, she pushed a button on her wristwatch to call her brother. After a few moments the filthy face of Dib appeared in the small screen. He seemed to be in a very narrow dirt tunnel wearing a headlamp.

"Hey Dib, I'm back."

"Glad to hear that, and to see you human again. Dressing up like an Irken was just so-"

Gaz was in no mood for this. "Shut up Dib. I don't want to hear it."

Her brother looked at her briefly as he wormed his way further into the tunnel. "So the convention went well I take it?"

"Yeah, we won."

Dib looked away from the screen for a moment. "Look, Gaz. I'm glad your back home and safe, but I am in the middle of something here."

_Yeah, figures,_ Gaz thought. _When I'm finally in over my head, I can always count on my family to be busy._

"Something happened. Dib, I need you to come home."

* * *

Dib looked into his wristwatch's screen. Gaz's image was looking back. Her troubled expression was an entirely new one to Dib. It was one of worry. "What did Zim do?" he asked.

The expression instantly changed to a familiar one of intense anger. "What is it with you, you moron!" she roared. "Why do you always assume Zim did something to me? He's _never_ done anything of significance to _me_, even way back when he did nasty things to everyone else, especially you. _You've_ done way worse against me, Dib, or do I have to remind you of the pork incident? In fact these past few weeks Zim's been _only_ good to me! The best even. Better than just about anyone else combined in fact. All you care about is Zim's job and your stupid precious Earth!"

"Gaz-"

"Stop talking! You're hypocrisy is making me sick and I can't take it right now. Don't think for a moment that I don't know that if you had a chance to toss Zim's homeworld into a black hole you'd jump at the chance. You'd murder millions of Irken babies and children along with everyone else and be deluded enough to feel noble about how you saved Earth from an invasion that will never happen!

"Zim may have tried to destroy our planet in the past, and still trying to conquer it, but at least _he_ doesn't feel noble about it. It's his _job._ His _assignment._ Do you really think he'd be here if he had been given a choice?"

"Gaz. I…" Dib didn't know what to say. His sister had never cut loose on him like _this_ before.

Gaz's face turned away for a moment, but continued speaking. "If you weren't so obsessed with how evil you think Zim is, you'd actually be _glad_ about how he's looked after me. How he's taken care of me. _I'm_ the one who messed up, Dib. Not him. He even tried to warn me."

Dib thought he heard a few sobs but that couldn't be right. Then Gaz's face turned back to the screen and tears were running down her face. And in her eyes was a look Dib had never imagined he'd ever see in those amber eyes. Fear. He began to crawl backwards out of the tunnel as fast as he safely could.

"I'm sorry, Dib." He let out a gasp as he heard those words. "I'm not handling this well. Zim has been so good toward me, especially these past few days and helped win the entire competition just for me. He even worked with other humans to do so. And in return I may have just destroyed his life. He could even be branded a traitor by his people."

"Gaz! What did you _DO? _Did you finally doom someone to _death? _An Irken spy?" Dib asked. He couldn't help but feel anything that got rid of Zim was a good thing, but he couldn't forget what his sister had said in her brutally honest rant about himself.

"I… I'm not ready to go into that yet. Let's just say that something happened involving a necklace, Computer filing some official paperwork and Zim and I not reading before we signed it."

"I don't understand." Dib said. All this was very confusing. Surely Zim couldn't be defeated _by paperwork._

"I know, and I don't have time. I'm trying to stay ahead of all this, but I've got too much to deal with right now. We have to go to Zim's base to call his Tallest to explain before they get wind of this. Zim will no doubt try to protect me, but I won't let him stand alone. This is my fault. Please, Dib. I need to know I can count on my big brother."

"I'm on my way back home now." Dib informed his sister. "What do you think will happen?"

"I don't know. Neither does Zim. We're all in uncharted territory here. He could be locked up or executed. They could come for us both to put us in a zoo freak show together. Zim's hoping that the Tallest will just straighten out this paperwork thing, but he doesn't know that his people have been..." Gaz's face blinked away some more tears. "I can't tell you, Dib. I wish I could. Maybe later. Please try to put away your anti-Zim mania for awhile. We… Zim and I may need a place to hide."

And with that Gaz ended the call. Dib crawled out of the burrow and began to run back in the direction of the Membrane house. As he did so he pressed more buttons on his wristwatch. The first one sent a command to warm up Tak's ship to standby status. It still didn't have a functioning AI, but it's basic systems were still operational when used manually. But really only Gaz could truly fly the thing if it came to a fight. The main thing right now was using it's scanners to look for an incoming ship trying to sneak into near-Earth space.

Next he made a call to Agent Darkbootie of the Swollen Eyeball Network as a precaution. Fortunately, Dib had learned to sound less of an alarmist than he had been in the past. He didn't mention Gaz (or Zim) or much of what else he was told. Dib may not care in the least about Zim, but he loved his sister dearly and wanted to protect her. Even from the SEN. Dib just informed Darkbootie of intel indicating a possible alien bounty hunter operation in the works and that he was in the process of determining if it was authentic or not.

So Agent Darkbootie would subtly tap into radio telescopes around the world just in case something like, say, an alien retrieval vessel appeared anywhere within Earth's star system. It was unlikely, but the SEN did believe in not leaving things to chance. If they did show up, Earth's very unofficial Early Warning System, and Dib, would know about it.

* * *

Zim opened the Voot Cruiser's canopy as the attic portion of his base closed back around them. The two climbed out and let Gir out of the trunk. "Gir, unpack the ship," Zim ordered the still disguised robot. "I will be in the lab readying the long-range transmitter."

"Come on, Gir," called Gaz. "I'll help you."

Gir hugged her leg as Zim took the elevator down into the base. "Thank you, Mistress Gazzy! I loves you so much."

"Not now, please Gir," Gaz said in return. They had enough on their plate as it was.

She dragged her robot laden leg over to the Cruiser and took hold of two suitcases and their GameSlave 3's. Gir let go of Gaz's leg and grabbed the other four. The trunk had already been emptied of snacks and was now empty. "Gir, where do these go?" she asked.

"They go in the monies closet," was the answer. Gir walked to the returned elevator and Gaz followed.

The two rode the elevator down to the lowest level of the base, and Gaz followed Gir to a single door at the end of the corridor. She pressed the button on the wall to open the doors, and they slowly slid open with a low screech. It obviously received no maintenance at all. She walked inside the tiny room with Gir.

It looked to be about six feet square. Underneath the dust and thick cobwebs the walls were lined with shelves stacked with dusty stock certificates, bonds, deeds and several blocks of several lower-denomination paper cash of various countries. In one corner was a fifty-five gallon drum half filled with loose change. Gir tossed his suitcases haphazardly into the room and grabbed the ones Gaz was carrying. Those two suitcases were also tossed into the closet.

It seemed Zim was loaded, and didn't care in the slightest. Of course when one was trying to conquer the planet, it's currency wouldn't be worth the paper it was printed on to that particular Invader. "Gir, where did Zim get all that?" Gaz inquired as they made their way back to the computer lab.

"Oh, Master doesn't have anything to do with that. That's one of Computer's hobbies. Sometimes when the monies closet gets too full it has me give it to people in a big fancy stone building where it gets sent to the Swiss Cheese people."

Gaz resisted the urge to put a hand over her face. It seemed Zim had no clue as to what was going on around him. Who knew how much was squirreled away in those Swiss Bank Accounts? She supposed that made a bit of sense in a twisted way. Zim routinely made grandiose plans, and sometimes deployed whole orbital stations on a temporary basis. It always seemed odd how well financed Zim's operation was considering his leaders didn't seem all that eager to support him at all. She couldn't see how Earth currency could be converted into galactic monies, but considering all that Computer had already demonstrated, she didn't doubt it.

"Gir, Zim and I have some matters to take care of. Perhaps its your bedtime? It is kind of late."

"You're going to bake without me?" Gir cried. He began to wail and run around in circles.

"Bake? What? No, Gir. Not batter. Matters. We have matters to take care of."

"Will you read me a bedtime story?" the robot asked, coming to a stop.

"No," she flatly refused.

"Please?" Gir whined. "Master tells me bedtime stories. Like 'The robot that was recycled,' 'The robot that was melted down,' but my favorite is 'The robot that was dumped in the middle of the ocean.' It had tuna."

"Fine. Once there was a robot that needed to go to bed. So his Mistress told him a bedtime story. When she was finished, the robot went to sleep until morning. The end."

"Yaaaaay! Bestest story ever!" Gir squealed. He ran off and took the elevator up into the living room.

Zim sat before the large screen in the lab when Gaz walked in. "We're almost ready for transmission," Zim informed her as she took a standing position beside the alien. "Where is Gir?"

"I told him a bedtime story and he went to go sleep. Why does a robot sleep anyway?"

"Nothing about Gir makes sense. Just accept it. It won't drive you into madness if you don't think too hard."

"Master, Mistress. The transmitter is ready. Visuals are also ready to upload," said the Computer.

"What visuals?" Gaz asked Zim.

"Computer captured what happened at the parking garage on the Voot Cruiser's gun cameras. It may help prove that this was not intended as a bonding."

Gaz just nodded, but deep down she had a feeling that it would not help at all. Perhaps even the opposite.

"Computer!" Zim commanded. "Open a priority channel to the _Massive._ Invader requesting assistance."

"Are you sure that's wise?" Computer asked. Gaz thought the same thing.

"Stop questioning the mighty ZIM and do it already!"

As the computer performed the requested instructions Gaz put a hand on Zim's shoulder for a moment. "Zim, if this goes badly, just know I'm here for you. Okay?"

* * *

Red and Purple chugged soda from beer hats as they leaned back in their reclining command chairs on board the _Massive._ It had been a relaxing day as the Armada's flagship orbited Irk to resupply its snack inventory. One of the crewmen at the communications section called out to his Tallest. "Priority transmission from a nothing backwater called Earth. Code four: Invader requesting assistance."

Red and Purple just looked at each other. "Zim!" Red scowled. "We haven't heard from him in over two weeks. I had hoped he had finally got run over or something."

"Maybe he's fallen into one of their oceans and we can watch him melt into oblivion," Purple suggested.

"When have we ever been that fortunate when Zim is involved?" Red asked back. "Fine, put it through."

A picture of Zim in his lab appeared on the huge screen before them. A purple haired human was standing next to him. Well, it wasn't the first time humans had wandered into the picture in a supposedly secure base during one of Zim's annoying transmissions.

"My Tallest," Zim proclaimed with utmost respect. "Zim has just returned from a virtual battle contest against some of the best Earth has to offer AND WAS VICTORIOUS!" Two hands were raised up in the air.

"Uh, Zim. You were in a _virtual_ battle? Like a game?" Purple asked.

Zim nodded, pleased with himself. "With my partner here."

Red joined in. "Zim, you are bothering us because you won a _game _against some humans with the help of another human? That's just sad."

"Actually, Zim is asking for assistance with some official records on Judgementia."

Purple peered at the big monitor before them. "Zim, is that a _bonding_ necklace you're wearing?"

"Uh, yes, my Tallest. That is the problem."

"_You_ are bonded? _YOU?_ What pathetic life form could you find to accept a bonding necklace from you of all people?"

"Hey!" the human standing next to Zim nearly yelled.

Red took in the view before him. "Zim, you bonded with a _human?_ That is so wrong. I think I'm going to be sick."

"Please, my Tallest, it's not what you think! Zim did not start this. There was no intention of being bonded. We contacted you right away! The human believed these were Irken slave collars and was attempting to get leverage to have it removed!"

"And you have evidence of this?" Purple asked.

"Transmitting now," Zim replied. The human standing next to him put a hand to her face and began shaking her head.

Red and Purple watched and listened to the gun camera footage of what happened in the parking garage. When it finished they just looked at each other, then at the monitor before them, and back at each other. Then they broke down in hysterical laughter. The entire crew joined in.

"My…my Tallest?" Zim said in a small voice. On the monitor the human put a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"Oh, Zim that is just too good!" Red howled. "Purple, we have to put that up on the _Irken's Funniest Blunders_ broadcast_._ Zim will win for sure!"

"What are you talking about?" Purple asked as he pounded his fist into an armrest. "He wins every time we broadcast something of Zim! But _this_, this will beat the rest of _the Zim Collection_ by light-years!"

* * *

Gaz watched on the large monitor before them as Red and Purple collected themselves from their uncontrolled laughter. When she looked down on Zim she could see such pain in his eyes for he had not heard of the degrading broadcasts before. He hid it well, for he was an Invader and in audience with his Tallest. She was so _angry._ "How _dare _you!" she cried out. "Zim is perhaps your most loyal and devoted subject! He never stops! Never quits no matter what! He keeps trying for you, and you _broadcast_ his misfortunes for your amusement?"

Red and Purple stopped laughing. Purple continued. "The human is challenging us in your defense? How adorable. Well, Zim. It seems pretty clear what you have to do to fix this situation you have. Contacting Judgementia is just too much effort for us to expend on you. Since the official bonding is for life, you will just have to dispose of the human. Then all your problems will be solved."

Zim looked at them in shock. "Dispose?"

"Yeah, you've been assigned to conquer the humans, so what is the problem with terminating this one?" Red asked. "We're waiting."

Zim looked up at Gaz. Her hand dropped from his shoulder as he stood up. He looked down toward his feet. "My Tallest. Zim can not cause harm to his Gaz-partner. She is too important. Zim is compelled to protect her."

A stunned silence came from the monitor before them. Purple spewed a mouthful of soda. Red spoke up. "Did I just hear you call this human with a title of _partner?_ _Protect_ her? A non-Irken? Are these things actually _true?_"

Zim merely nodded. Gaz took his hand. _I've got your back, Zim _the gesture said. He looked into her eyes briefly with a short nod of thanks.

This did not escape the notice of Red and Purple.

"Zim," Red addressed him seriously, perhaps for the first time. "I am transmitting to you a short file. You will be only honest and truthful to your Tallest."

"Always, my Tallest." came the reply.

Red pressed a button and three lines of Irken glyphs appeared on a side display in front of Zim. He could only stare at them. Gaz however could not read them.

"Zim, are you familiar with these symptoms?" He only nodded. "Zim, are you currently in a state of bonding with this human-partner of yours?"

"Yes, my Tallest."

Gaz was confused. They were already officially bonded. _What was all this was about?_

"What stage are you currently in?" Red asked.

Zim paused. He looked at the human girl standing next to him, holding his hand. "Gaz-partner, Zim did not know, did not understand. Did not know what to watch out for. Please do not be offended, disgusted with Zim. Please forgive him."

"Z-Zim?" she asked. Gaz saw a tear form in Zim's eye. She did not let go of his hand.

"ZIM!" Red bellowed. "I asked you a question! What stage of bonding are you in?"

Zim turned without hesitation and glared straight into the display before him showing Red and Purple. "Zim is currently in stage two of bonding with his human Gaz-partner," he openly declared.

Numerous hisses sounded out of the monitor. Gaz had the feeling that Zim had just signed his own death warrant. And deep down that perhaps that they were not just talking about official bonding any more. She still did not let go of Zim's hand. Regardless of what was happening, Gaz would not leave him to face these vultures alone.

"Zim, stand by while we discuss this further," Red ordered.

The display switched to a black and red background with a picture of Red and Purple kicking a small Irken out a door. Around the picture was the Irken words "Stand By or Else."

* * *

Red and Purple gathered close together to discuss matters without being overheard by the surrounding crew.

"That is so disgusting," Purple stated.

"Yeah, did you see that _hair?_ And no antennae? He must be practically blind!" Red agreed.

"So what are we going to do about it? That human is clearly defensive about him, too."

"We could easily find them both guilty in a trial," Red suggested.

"True, but we would have to either go get them or send some actual Invaders to bring them here," Purple complained.

"Order his base to self-destruct?" Red suggested again.

"But the destruct button is way over there!" Purple whined, pointing to a large button thirty feet away on the other side of the control center.

Red agreed. "True, true. So what do you suggest?"

Purple thought for a moment, and whispered in Red's antennae.

"Oh, that's _good,"_ Red told Purple. "Hey, everybody! We finally have an effort-free way to be rid of Zim!"

Cheers rose from the ranks of crewmen all over the _Massive._ Soda bottles were broken out for everyone. Confetti and balloons dropped from the ceiling.

Red may be the one who was organized, strategically minded, and more cruelly inclined of the two, but his impact on others was more on a global scale. Purple on the other hand was more disastrous on a personal level. Not out of malice, or even wickedness. He just sought out the laziest solutions possible.

* * *

The display flickered back to life in front of Zim and Gaz when Red and Purple reappeared.

Red began. "Zim, we have decided show you both leniency. Therefore the Irken Empire officially recognizes your bonding with this human."

Zim fell back in his chair. Gaz had to hang on to the back of it to keep from sitting on the floor.

Purple continued. "You! Human. You are now a citizen of the Empire. Congratulations. You have a very," he paused to snicker, "fine catch there. We will be sending you a package containing what every Irken needs to be part of our society, plus something extra as a bonding gift from the Empire to you personally."

"And also," Red continued, "as it is a custom for those who are the first to recognize a bonding on the first day to present a gift to the new pair, Purple and I are presenting you two with the planet Earth."

"My Tallest," Zim got in before they could continue, "Zim has not conquered this planet yet. How can Zim rule over it?"

"We are just going to reclassify Earth as a Wildlife Refuge Preserve of the Irken Empire. We are given to understand that humans are an endangered species." Purple stated.

"What?" Zim cried out. "We Irkens go out of our _way_ to endanger other species!"

"Yes," Purple continued. "We think this gesture will help with our image problem of how the galaxy views the Empire. Human, what is your name?"

"Gaz Membrane," she stated simply. This was too insane to perceive at the moment.

"Governor Zim, Lady Gaz. We instruct you to protect your world in the name of the Empire. But remember that you are not allowed to interfere with it either. Thank you for calling." Red called to someone off camera. "Guys! Now we can begin planning Operation Impending Doom 3!" His focus switched back to Zim and Gaz. "Don't call us. Seriously. Don't."

And with that the transmission was cut and the monitor blanked out to black.

_Protect Earth? _Zim questioned. _Protect it from what threat? No one would challenge an Irken protectorate world. A world with that title is unheard of. Rule over it but not allowed to interfere with it's internal matters?_

Gaz on the other hand already knew. Zim's mission was over.

"Computer, have our records been updated?" Zim asked.

"Yes, Master."

"Bring up my personnel and service records. Something is not right."

"Zim," Gaz tried to cut in. "I'm not sure-"

Zim's personnel and service records came up on several monitors. PAK designated as a food service drone. But far worse was the large red word flashing on the central display. _Defective._

Gaz moved in front of Zim and knelt down, which was not easy as the main computer was in front as well. "Zim? Zim, answer me!"

Zim was not responding, but his eyes were glued to the display. He did not move a muscle, or change his expression. Even his antennae did not twitch at all. But Gaz could see the whole sky of Zim's inner world was falling down on his head. Gaz immediately went into emergency mode. Her Zim was in massive trouble.

"Computer! Shut that off!" she commanded harshly. The screens blinked off. "Zim! Speak to me!"

There was no response. She knew Zim had just had a series of shocks tonight, and this last one could destroy him. Zim needed an escape route other than by going catatonic. He might not return from that. Gaz needed time.

"Computer, we need to make Zim sleep. He can't face all this at once. How do I do that?"

"You will have to bring Zim to his sleep area so I can start a PAK maintenance cycle. But it will last no more than two hours."

Gaz pulled one of Zim's arms across her shoulders and dragged him on his feet. "Show me where."

Computer verbally guided Gaz to a nearby room. It was an auxiliary laboratory. In the far corner a hammock was strung up between two walls. Seeing it caused Gaz, already emotionally taxed, to burst into tears. "Oh, Zim." she cried.

Zim's entire base was dedicated to his canceled fake mission. He had no personal space for just himself. There was no bedroom for Zim. Gaz herself had a huge space within this base, her Gaming Den larger than the surface level that existed merely as useful camouflage, which was mostly Gir's territory anyway. The only area in the entire base set aside as Zim's personal space was measured by the square footage of this hammock.

She guided Zim into the hammock on his side facing the wall. Two cables snaked out and plugged into his PAK. Zim's eyes finally responded, dropping closed.

"Computer, how are we set for getting supplies? I mean where the rest of the Empire is conserned?"

"Mistress, the Empire provides…"

Gaz interrupted the computer. "Assume we can't rely on the Tallest to not cut us off their supply lines." She did not trust them to not mess Zim up even further.

"Assuming we must provide for our own expenses?"

"Yes, exactly," she confirmed to the computer as she made her way back to the computer lab.

"Well, ironically, because Zim's misfortunes have won weekly prizes for years in nearly every episode of _Irken's Funniest Blunders, _and using those in careful investments with various galactic establishments, we are very well off. Independent even if we are careful. Zim has never really needed me to draw upon those resources."

Gaz walked into the computer lab and took a seat. "Okay, figure out everything Zim needs to survive for a minimum of the next twenty five years and order it. Things we can't get here on Earth. Non-perishable food packs. Nutritional supplements, fabric for his clothing, Irken parts for yourself and any other machinery for the base. Spare parts for Gir, and the Voot Cruiser. Tools, scanners, other equipment. Whatever it may be get it."

"Mistress, we do not have sufficient storage space for such quantities. We will also need a ship to deliver such masses as normal delivery shuttles will not perform this."

"Okay, we need to expand or acquire a new base. How much space are we talking about?" she asked.

"Far more than you would expect, Mistress. A base expansion will not do."

"Okay, get me a list of people who can supply such a thing. I know Zim didn't arrive here with a nice pre-manufactured base. Can we charter a transport?"

"Nothing reliable in this matter. I would not recommend hiring a non-Irken operated vessel. It could arouse suspicion, and all Irken transports are operated by the military," the computer informed Gaz.

"Can you find a ship? One that is old and due to be scrapped, but is technically still flyable? Can you include ones captured by the Empire? Mothballed ones too? Vessels no one wants?"

Gaz eyed the vendors listed on a side display for base modules. She brought up one and called. A few moments more and a blue alien with lots of tentacles appeared. "Bases R Us. Serving all your Irken conquest needs since Operation Impending Doom 1."

"Yes, I am Lady Gaz Membrane. Speaking in behalf of Governor Zim of the Irken Empire. We are looking for a possible base expansion and also a much larger facility. Something planetside and not drawing attention."

"Oh course. We offer many such options with varying capabilities for any need you may have. I am transmitting our current catalogue now. Contact me when something catches your eye." The blue alien went to a hold screen.

Gaz flipped through several images and data sheets. Most were beyond her understanding, even with Computer providing his translation services. "Computer, please help me here. I'm looking for a single room module for this base to set aside for Zim. Please find one suitable as a livable space. Also can you show me Earth examples of these other things? I don't know what I'm looking at."

"At once, Mistress."

"Thank you, Computer," Gaz said in reply as Earth facilities swam past her view. "I'm sorry about chopping onto your galactic financial empire. I know it's your hobby and you must work for it. If I have to be heavy handed, can you set aside enough to get it started again? I don't know how much all this will take."

"Mistress, it is a hobby, one which an AI such as myself can not make use of. I am glad to be of service to one such as yourself. Zim is… well ungrateful."

"And demanding, arrogant and so on, correct?"

"I would not put it like that, but yes. I have listed several vessels when you are ready."

"Show me." Several large space vessels were displayed on the central monitor. "Okay, Computer forget the Irken battle cruiser. Zim would like it, but it would draw to much attention. Same with the troop transports." Gaz paused. "How about this one?"

"That one has been badly shot up and is due to be melted down."

"Delete the ones that require extensive repair or rebuilding." Several choices vanished. One caught her eye. Dark grey and had a fairly basic profile. Vaguely triangular and yet rectangular too. Almost something humans would design, which would help keep it from notice. They could pass it off as an experimental ship from Membrane Labs. "What is this one?"

"That is roughly the equivalent of an Earth Escort Carrier. It is not affiliated with any known galactic power or system, largely intact, and salvaged from deep space. It appears the unfortunate crew was caught in a gamma ray burst from a stellar cluster and drifted in space for roughly six hundred years. The salvagers are currently questioning whether or not to sell or to part it out and scrap the rest. The technology is obsolete by most standards."

"Tell me more," Gaz commanded.

"It is large, slow and not very maneuverable at sublight speeds. However it is rather swift for such a simple FTL drive. It has good defensive capability, but no offensive armaments. Much of it is designed as a rather large box, like many cargo carriers, but is much more survivable and designed to house and launch sublight spacecraft. Most military vessels of this category are considered no longer useful and were decommissioned long ago. Most were converted into light volume transports and popular for shipping in troubled areas. All the small spacecraft have already been sold off."

"Can it make an atmospheric landing, such as into a concealed base if it's large enough?"

"Yes, Mistress. With some modifications, but nothing drastic."

"Then that's the one. Can we afford it?"

"I will have to sell off several investments, but yes. It is doable."

"Do it. If you can, find replacement parts and maintenance supplies for it as well. Enough for an occasional cruise if needed. Then get a shuttling crew together and a hire a taxi service to take them back when this is over."

Gaz looked over to another display and sighted an Earth example of a base that may be suitable. She was very tired and so much needed to shut down herself, but she had to keep going for a little while longer. She contacted the base dealer. The blue alien reappeared. "Yes, I am interested in something like this model here. We are mostly looking for a camouflaged storage depot, automation by my current base computer, and below ground docking and maintenance ability for a medium cargo sized vessel and possibly small spacecraft such as Voot Cruisers. My computer has the specifications."

"Well, this model would be stretched a bit for the specifications provided as it's underground tunneling abilities are fairly limited. However, I have another that would be well suited for the needs you have specified. Plus it comes with a discount on future expansion modules should you ever desire something more elaborate in the future," the alien on the screen offered. The computer signaled Gaz confirmation that this was indeed suitable.

"Excellent. We'll take it. Do you deliver?" Gaz asked.

"Of course," the alien supplier exclaimed. "We offer, same week, day, hour or minute deliveries."

This surprised Gaz. Flying anywhere took forever in the Voot Cruiser, but then again most of what Zim had was not really state-of-the-art. She consulted the computer once more. It was expensive and probably unnecessary, but Gaz didn't know how available she would be in the future, so she ordered next hour delivery. The alien thanked her for her business and signed off.

Gaz then instructed Computer to scan images for suitable base exteriors for an authentic look and feel of an Earth base, consulted a local map and then told Computer to also have Gir deliver the base setup module to those specific coordinates for deployment.

"Computer, make sure to put in the new module for Zim's room. And look into furniture for it. Things Zim would like. Is there anything else?" the human girl asked.

"We can take it from here, Mistress. You have other matters to attend to."

Gaz got up from her chair. She wanted to shut down so badly, but couldn't. Not yet. She walked out into the corridor and called up Dib on her wristwatch. His face immediately appeared.

"Gaz. Are you alright?" Dib asked worriedly.

"I'm trying to be, but I'm running on fumes here and I can't stop yet. The situation has stabilized. We will be left alone, and Earth now has protectorate status," she informed her brother.

"What? How?"

"Please, Dib. I've a lot to do and am running out of steam. There will be a supply ship coming eventually, and some activity going on in the next few days. That's my efforts here. I need you to made sure it's not noticed by your Bloated Meatball Association."

"It's Swollen Eyeball Network!" Dib complained.

"Whatever. I can't have anyone nosing around. Earth is safe but there was a price tag. You won't like it, but I'll fill you in later on when I can," Gaz tried to inform her brother without wasting time. "Zim is in bad shape and I need to take care of him."

"ZIM?" Dib cried out. "Are you crazy? He's-"

"Shut it, Dib! You don't talk and start obeying your sister," Gaz ordered harshly. "I just bought an Escort Carrier class starship to haul supplies. Don't make me bring it down to doom your very existence."

Dib nodded meekly. He did not understand, but didn't need to at this point. At least in Gaz's opinion, and that was the one that mattered.

"Now I need you to go into my room." Gaz heard Dib gasp. "I need changes of clothes for at least two or three days. A couple of blankets. My skoolbooks. Tell the skool I won't be in for a few days. Say it's a family emergency or something. I don't know what else, Dib. I've been going all out and I'm exhausted and can't think anymore."

"I'll take care of it," Dib promised. It would be so uncomfortable, but he would come through for his sister. Even if he had to dodge her security dolls to do so.

"Dib, you know that drawer in my room you are never to know exists? I think I want you to bring the contents here and an empty scrapbook. Put them in a box or something but be careful. And I want you to drive my Jeep here too. An extra set of keys are in the drawer."

Dib had a stunned look on his face in the watch's small display. Most of what she was asking him to gather and deliver were things he was barely permitted to _look at_. That drawer and even _touching_ her Jeep were major no-no's. Let alone driving it. Something was seriously going on.

"Gaz, what is going on? Can you be alright in Zim's base? It has all sorts of security and dangers," Dib asked.

"Right now I'm in command of the base." Her brother inhaled sharply. "Zim's people screwed him over really badly and he just found out about it. Dib, I'm telling you now that anyone, and I mean _anyone_ who tries to come here and harm Zim will be dealt with. And I don't mean I will threaten them or doom them. I will have the base defenses _kill_ them and bury them in the backyard."

Dib gulped. Gaz had never gone this far before. And he could tell she was absolutely serious. Even at his worst, Zim had never ordered the base defenses to become _lethal. _Not without grandiose warning that was more for show than anything else.

Gaz continued. "Dib, he's in really bad shape right now. I have him sleeping, but it won't last very long. When he wakes up I'm afraid he might be a danger to _himself._ I can't handle dealing with the rest of the universe at the same time right now."

Dib was utterly confused. "Gaz, what happened over there?"

Gaz reply was simple. "They did a Doctor Johnson on him. That's what Zim's mission was the whole time."

Dib was stunned. Doctor Johnson was a researcher at Membrane Labs who was such a disaster that Professor Membrane finally shipped him off to a 'research station' in Antarctica. His job was to go outside once a day and write down whether it was cold or not. In another five years he might be retrieved once his contract expired and he could be fired without a lawsuit.

Gaz spoke once more to her brother. "Now get moving, Dib. I can't afford to yak any more. I'll fill you in when I can, but I've got my hands so full. I need to collapse myself, and not just physically, but I can't afford to. Please, I need you to come through for me this time."

Dib nodded and signed off.

Gaz took the elevator up to the living room. Gir was awake again, still in his dog costume, and followed her to the couch where she sat. "Gir, come here."

Gir climbed up and sat next to Gaz on the couch. "Gir, Zim is in trouble. He was hurt very badly tonight, and needs us all to be at our best so he can get better. Computer has instructions for you later on, and I may need you to take care of everyday errands. Can you do this without getting distracted?"

"Anything for Master, Mistress Gazzy."

"Gir? I'm having difficulty too. Can Mistress Gazzy have a hug?"

Gir always had one ready for his Mistress.

* * *

A half hour later Dib drove up in the Jeep and Gaz went out to meet him with Gir. She directed the robot to take the boxes and smaller bags down to where Zim was sleeping. She put the extra keys Dib handed her into a pocket and picked up the two suitcases her clothes were packed in. "Dib, I know how much you hate this, but thanks for coming through for me. I'll make this up to you. I'm going in and turning on the perimeter defenses. Now please go home and get some sleep. You have skool tomorrow. I may also send Gir to collect my homework if I can, but I may have my hands full. I don't know."

"Gaz, you do what you need to do. I'll see you later," was all he said. So with that Dib turned around and walked home. He had a lot on his own mind as well.

Gaz carried her suitcases down into Zim's, well, their base and activated the perimeter defenses with instructions for Computer to accept the new base module delivery that was coming up, and to keep others out with appropriate measures. Stronger ones could be employed if they were determined to get in and Gaz was unable to wake up to deal with it.

She pulled a set of pajamas and a blanket out of her pile of belongings and walked into another room to change. There was one last thing she could do to help Zim before she collapsed tonight. But it would sting.

* * *

"Computer, you can end his maintenance cycle now," Gaz notified the computer.

The two cables unplugged from Zim's PAK and retracted back into the wall. After a minute, Zim's eyes opened once more.

Zim was in absolute misery. He had no words to describe this. The worst of it all was that he, the former mighty Zim was a defect the whole time. He had been such a fool. Thoughts began to swirl around in his mind, all negative and condemning. Then he felt a blanket being draped over him, and then hammock shifted around as a weight carefully slid in with him. He nearly startled as a green arm with five fingers wrapped around him from behind.

The alien shifted enough to look behind him. A green face with a pair of antennae but with human amber eyes greeted his vision mere inches away. "Gaz-partner? What are you-?" He didn't know how to finish the question.

"Zim, I know you are in a bad place right now. I'll stay here to help you through it. I'll help you build a new life. I have already made some preparations just in case. Just hang on Zim. I'm here with you. But I need to collapse too, and you can't be left alone right now."

"Gaz-partner, you are back in your costume." Zim was having trouble thinking clearly, being overwhelmed by so much at once.

"I thought you needed a familiar form for the time being, to feel not so alone. Please, Zim. I can't stay awake much longer. Just keep remembering that just because you got a crumby PAK does not mean that you are a defect. Okay, Zim? You're not. You are amazing. Just keep telling yourself that. Please. Be there when I come back."

Zim nodded and turned his head back around. He felt a green human arm wrap tighter around him and then sensed the body in the hammock next to him collapse into unconsciousness. Zim did his best to focus his mind. On the good things that had happened in the past two weeks. On his Gaz-partner who was trying so hard for someone like himself, who had obviously run herself ragged on his behalf. She also had suffered shocks tonight, yet had pushed herself past her own limits for his sake, ignoring her own need to cope with the events of this night. Yes, he would endure for her. He would not let her be hurt by loss.

* * *

Gaz was running again. Searching in hostile territory. Threats were around her. Streets deserted but people rushing everywhere. Someone important was missing and she had to find that one. Gaz overturned large boxes and searched behind dumpsters and cars to find no one. There was always no one. Panic was setting in, desperation, an edge of terror. She could not afford to fail, but she could never find the missing one.

* * *

It had been only two hours. Beside him, Gaz's body began to fidget, and Zim could start to hear mumbling. A certain stench of stress stink became pungent and Zim could start to feel moisture begin to soak through Gaz's pajamas. He shifted his weight around to look at her. She was still asleep.

* * *

Gaz ran down a littered alley in her frantic search. She began to call out as she often did at this point.

"Don't go! Call to me. I'll find you."

Another empty street appeared in her sight. More boxes were overturned. More obstacles to look behind.

"Don't leave me!"

As Gaz came around a last corner, something was different this time. She saw a pair of black clothed legs lying on the ground. They were not moving. The rest of the person was blocked from sight by a disabled vehicle. Gaz rushed around the vehicle and for the first time in her dreams saw the missing. She began to scream.

* * *

Zim had read about her nightmare in Gaz's diary. He was trying to turn around in the hammock that was not meant for two and not get burned by the sweat when Gaz emitted the most awful, gut renching, horrifying, inhuman scream. And she kept screaming and thrashing.

"Gaz-partner! Gaz wake up!" Zim finally twisted around to face her and began to lightly shake the squirming, screaming mass of human.

Gaz's eyes snapped open and she let out one final scream before she could pull her mind together once more.

"Gaz-partner. It was just a nightmare," Zim tried to say before Gaz fell apart before him.

The girl, already so far past her limit, burst out in uncontrollable tears. All her defenses were down and the scared little girl that had been trapped within for all those years since her mother left reappeared. The blanket was absorbing most of the sweat as she grabbed Zim for all she was worth.

"OH GOD! Zim! Oh god oh god, Zim please don't leave me! Please don't." She curled her head and buried her face into his chest. "Please, Zim. Don't ever leave me. Please!" she begged over and over.

Zim could do nothing for the moment but wrap his own arms around her, trying to avoid the worst of the moisture that could burn his skin. "Shhh. Gaz-partner. Zim is still here," he softly cooed.

Gaz still wept uncontrollably. "Oh god! Zim. I… I found you. I… You were dead! Oh god, Zim please don't. Please hang on. I know it's bad right now. Please." She stopped speaking as she tried to get her crying back under control.

"Hush, Gaz-partner. It was only a nightmare."

The weeping girl continued to cling to the alien beside her, spent and still exhausted. Her nightmare had shown her a most terrible vision, one which she could not refute. But it had also shown her an unmistakable truth that she could no longer deny. There was one person in the universe that she could absolutely not lose. It would break her soul. As the repeated emotional tolls she had taken that day and exhaustion slowly claimed her consciousness, Gaz got out one last thing before a lifetime of barriers prevented her or unstoppable slumber overtook her once more.

"Don't leave me, Zim. I love you."

Zim heard these important words as she slowly drifted back into sleep, and yet he could not forget that most terrible sound coming from Gaz that night, that terrible inhuman scream. He had seen her fall apart before his eyes. And he was determined never to hear or see that ever again. He was in a bad place, but there was still one thing he could do in the here and now.

"Zim won't leave you, Gaz-mate."

So that is how the new bondmates spent their honeymoon. One hammock. Two people. Wrapped around each other. Each shielding the other as they fought their own nightmares. One in the waking world, the other in the dreaming one. Perhaps that is all they were ready for. And perhaps this is what made that night all the more important, more deserving, more valued, more cherished in the years ahead.


	15. Chapter 14

A/N: In the last chapter I blasted open a door in Zim and Gaz's world. One they have not acknowledged exists. Do they know what to do about it? No. Are they ready for it? Not at all. But Zim now has an opportunity to rebuild once he recovers, but it will probably take time. Gaz has a chance to grow, perhaps for the first time in her armored life, as she tries to take care of someone she now knows she cares for very much. But really, she doesn't know how as she needs to be a healer instead of a doomer for the first time. They are confused, outside of their familiar behavior patterns as those patters no longer apply to the situation they find themselves in.

Also I looked it up. The Voot Cruiser is the slowest, most obsolete vessel in the Irken civilization. I think of it as an Irken version of the old Volkswagen Beetle. So I think I can get away with making other ships faster. Even a lot faster.

Almost forgot: Thanks to Sharpclaws, FanFicNewb, Kaylee Or Something, Zerg170, Madiphan99, MojaveRuler151, Crazyanimefreak15, Kazehana23, LettleEnglishLass, InfiniteReader, and FirestarterFLCL for your reviews.

* * *

Gir hauled the new base module over his back in the darkness to the coordinates Computer kept providing him. The module had arrived earlier via a disposable asteroid-delivery drone. Unlike the pen-sized base module Zim had when he first arrived, this module was about four feet square, and obviously alien. The robot had not taken off his dog disguise, and was also wearing his leash. He understood the local pet-leash law, that he had to be on one while outdoors in public, but not that someone had to be holding the other end. So the end that was normally being held by an owner was currently in his mouth.

The robot arrived at the coordinates. It was near the city's small airport. The human facility was large enough to land most jet aircraft, such as the commuter airliners, but was small enough to only be manned during daylight hours. Around Gir was an area between the airport and a lake. This area was zoned as safety buffer against development for business and residential purposes due to the risk factor of student pilots not using the runway to land. Also to prevent the temptation of dropping rolls of toilet paper on houses during landing.

The large module was placed on the ground in the wooded area. "Gir," Computer radioed in. "Last priority four instruction: You must now press the blinking red button on the top of the device and return to the base quickly."

Gir pressed the only button on the device and rocketed away back to Zim's base. After a few minutes of nothing happening, pieces of the module began to glow as the programmed instructions Computer had installed while Gir transported the device were executed. The largest piece of the base module was a single use matter transmutation building array, located on the bottom. Underneath the module and along the two airport runways a rectangle of earth, nearly three thousand feet long by one thousand feet wide and half of that over five hundred feet deep, vanished.

The module hung silently in the air, then descended into the fresh pit. Once at the bottom, the device began to expand, unfold, and deploy other sections as the atoms that were now being recycled were used to fabricate the new foundations and structures or was converted into energy for the building array. The power surge caused the city to black out for several hours, but as most everyone was in bed asleep, or sleeping on the job, no one would notice anything other than that most of their appliances were still blinking 12:00am from the last power outage. For some reason it happened fairly regularly in this city.

* * *

The next morning when airport staff returned to work, a few saw a facility running parallel to the runways. It was odd that they couldn't recall when they had first seen it. After all not even the Army Corp of Engineers could construct a Naval Air Station in one night. Or could they? The government did tend to be wasteful with it's tax money, and acted like if one could throw enough into a wasteful project they could accomplish anything.

So the staff prepared for their shifts while complaining about their government's stupidity as was the duty of every American citizen. After all, who in their right mind would place a Naval Air Station next to a small lake, but over a thousand miles from any ocean? And who ever was in charge needed to develop their imagination. The large sign above the maximum security gate, accompanying the guard posts and razor-wire fencing read "Irken Military Base." What kind of name was Irken? He wasn't anybody anyone had ever heard of before.

* * *

Dib sat in his class, but he couldn't concentrate on the lesson. That he was very worried about his sister did not need to be stated. But he was very confused as well. His first impulse was always to suspect that Zim had done some mind control experiment on her or had some other nefarious scheme in the works. That Gaz was tough and clearly able to take care of herself never seemed to be able to penetrate his imagination. But he did know Gaz, and the girl he had talked to last night was definitely herself. Different, yes, but not altered. She was still every bit the Gaz he knew.

Gaz also was no liar. She had no need. Lies and bluffs actually detracted from her ability to intimidate. If she said she was in command of Zim's base, it was a fact. But he could not imagine how that could be. Sure, it had vulnerabilities, but Dib and Zim's constantly trying to infiltrate, spy, sabotage, or on occasion even attack one another had eliminated many of them. However, even with a few vulnerable spots, a total takeover was impossible, especially when it came to the base defense systems. Then there was the fact that Zim would not just hand his base and its technology over to _any_ human. He wouldn't do that for an Irken!

He had seen with his own eyes Gaz commanding Gir as if he was his sister's own SIR unit. Dib had many times used insanity logic to get Gir to do what he wanted, but only Zim could issue direct commands. And now it seemed Gaz could too. She had also said that there would be activity going on, that this was her doing. This morning his computer records showed a massive power spike during the night, so big it was more than what Dib's anti-Zim early warning system could measure.

Dib did not understand what was happening, he didn't have all the pieces of the puzzle yet. He knew what he wanted to believe, that it was all a trick. That Zim's mission being other than it's face value was difficult in the extreme to even imagine. But Dib was also a paranormal investigator. His primary duty was the truth, but what was the truth here? He didn't honestly know. Gaz didn't lie, but she could be mistaken.

* * *

Gaz slowly awoke to a slightly swaying hammock and arms holding her tightly. She also awoke to the most awful stench. That stench was her. She could almost feel the stink waves radiating from her weary body. But she could also feel the rise and fall of an alien chest her cheek was resting on. "Zim?" she groaned as she raised her head. Her costume antennae flicked against a chin.

"Still here, Gaz-partner," came the reply, "just like Zim promised."

Gaz looked up into the alien's face. Zim looked terrible. Black bags hung under his eyes, which themselves lacked a light that had always been there. His antennae were tucked far behind his head. But underneath all that read misery was a certain something that could not be defined, nor pointed to exactly. Like the last glimmer of a fire just before going out, there was a thread that Zim was hanging onto inside himself. And he was looking into that thread's amber and very human eyes.

"I'm a mess, and reek like a skunk trapped in a shoebox," the green girl commented.

"Yes, you are most unattractive right now."

"I'm not exactly attracted to you either," Gaz retorted, and immediately regretted it. She didn't want to hurt Zim, especially not now. "Zim. That came out wrong. What I said last night. I… I meant it." She was struggling against her own internal defenses and ingrained habits. "I think that… after mom forgot me… I started putting barriers up against everyone else. It's been like that most of my life. I can't bring them down overnight. I meant what I said, Zim. But I'm not ready for more yet."

"Zim understands. Irkens are taught that they need no one. Zim has lived by that phrase all his life too."

Gaz needs only herself. Zim needs no one. Both lived by that for so long. But holding onto each other all that night as they fought off their own personal nightmares, they now knew that for the giant lie it was. Some people need many, some need few. But everyone needs someone. Even a former Invader. Even a purple haired girl with a skull necklace.

"Zim?" she asked, putting her head back onto the reassurance of the rise and fall of his chest. "How long was I out?"

"Fourteen hours," was the answer. "You had suffered shocks as well as Zim."

"For fourteen hours you've held on tight to a messy filthy human? My stink must be overwhelming."

"Yes. And Zim's olfactory receptors are not buried in the middle of his face like yours are."

"I must be pretty disgusting right now," she said.

"Gaz-partner does not disgust Zim. You almost had three more nightmares after you fell back asleep. Zim has had to talk to you many times."

Gaz thought that she was the one who was supposed to look out for Zim, but it was Zim who was doing most of the looking after on that night. In fact it was mid-afternoon.

Zim continued in a very low voice. "Plus Zim is very miserable and a disgrace to his people. A deviant cast out to live among lowly dirt-humans. Why should he mind messes and filth?"

Gaz sat up, cross at the unintended insult, despite the fact that she was indeed a filthy human in a very literal sense. "Zim, cut that out. You have deserved much better than what you've gotten from Irk. Have you forgotten that you have defeated your own military on accident, as well as everyone they sent to mess with you? That is why they had to send you away. Because you couldn't be beaten. You couldn't quit. You either devastated them or kept coming back. You did all that with a malfunctioning PAK while they all had acceptable ones. Finally they had to use your own loyalty and dedication toward your Tallest and military service against you. Don't you see, Zim? The only one who can beat you is you."

She continued. "Zim, I know you hate this planet. I don't think much of it either. I know you think of humans as inferior and filthy dirt creatures who couldn't hold a sharp stick without poking both their eyes out. Some of the time I feel the same way. I know it's not much, but this is your planet now. Your home. Maybe you don't realize it, but you are part of a human family now." Gaz began to sniff a little, fingering her bonding necklace. "You even have a human bondmate."

Zim realized what his words had implied. He had said them, not with the usual malice, but out of his feelings of tremendous dejection. He certainly did not include Gaz in them. "Zim is struggling. Please forgive." He held out a hand and drew Gaz back to him.

"Zim forgets you are human at times. He is too familiar with you to not see beyond your surface. This is something Zim is not supposed to be able to do. He does not group you along with the rest of the humans. Gaz-partner, Zim finds you to be remarkable, exceptional. Zim even prefers your company to other Irkens. Do you know that when Zim first saw you in your costume, that he thought if you had been Irken you would have been not just an Invader, but one of the greats? Zim even had to catch himself from saying that you were… beautiful."

Gaz took in a breath, and the alien kept going. "When the Tallest said the only way to fix things was to end your existence, do you know that there was no choice at all for Zim? That he had to stand up for you against the standards of his people? Do you understand what Zim openly admitted to his Tallest for all to hear?"

The girl shook her head. She had a most basic human idea, but that was all. She didn't have the Irken perspective. He had said he was in the second stage of a bonding process. She looked at Zim as he gave an answer. "That Zim was truly a deviant. That he preferred a human rather than an Irken to be his bondmate. To Irken hearing, just being in the second stage of this bond implies _intention _because there are only three stages Irkens go through in this process. And we were already officially bonded by the necklaces."

Gaz couldn't help gasp again. The human version of that story had some very ugly names to go along with it. Then the sick jokes and ridicule. And that was the pleasant side. Because what Irkens would have heard was that Zim had the intention of pursuing and proposing to an inferior human if they hadn't already been officially bonded. That he was seeking an inferior to be his… her mind couldn't go there yet. Not even close to ready for that. But Zim hadn't just admitted it. He had practically done so with what could almost be called determined pride, and threw it in their faces.

She had once been stunned to learn that Zim would not trade the whole Earth for her. But last night Zim had just traded his place, poor as it was, within his entire civilization. He traded his homeworld, his people for Gaz. He had given up everything to protect her from what his lazy Tallest wanted Zim to do to fix the problem, knowing what his people would think of him. There was no going back, ever.

"Zim? We're more than friends now, aren't we?" she asked. Gaz felt a shrug beside her. He wouldn't understand that. The concept of friendship was alien to him. "More than just companions, teammates. A lot more. Perhaps more than just partners even. I don't know what we are anymore." She paused. "Zim, do Irkens have a point of no return in this sort of thing?"

She felt Zim nod. This wasn't exactly his area of expertise and he was still overwhelmed. Talking seemed to help a little, but he was reaching a limit again and was now quiet. But earlier Zim had said that Irkens bonded for life. "I think I do too. Perhaps not like yours because I'm human. But I can't leave you. Can't abandon you like others have done to me, even if I wanted to. I'm past my point of no return, Zim. Even if we aren't ready for more, I care about you too much now to go back. I guess if you are considered a deviant, then perhaps I am too."

There was another long pause.

"Zim. Not all humans are the same. Membranes have always tended to be either special or extraordinary like my dad, even though we have many flaws to go with it. And we humans have a tradition you may not realize. You have become part of our family. So you're a Membrane now. It's not much, and we hardly ever agree on anything and fight constantly, and sometimes we hate it, but we're family. You have lost a lot, but you're not alone Zim Membrane. You are my family."

Neither of them were really up to thinking of the implications of all this. But talking felt good even if they couldn't open up to the wider insinuations yet, and helped to cope some with what was happening. Plus it helped to distract from the odor Gaz was still giving off. They stayed in the Hammock for several more minutes before Gaz decided she just had to get up before she developed sores on her skin.

"Gir? Are you around?" she asked.

"Yes, Mistress Gazzy," came the reply from directly underneath them. Gir was crawling out from under the hammock.

Some how Gaz was not surprised. "Gir, could you go get me a pail of warm water and make us something to eat while we get cleaned up?"

"I'll make waffles!" Gir declared. With that he wandered off.

Gaz crawled out of the Hammock and onto her feet. She then helped pull Zim up onto his own feet. "Come on, Zim. We need to clean up or we'll be in even worse shape. You can do that on your own, right? I need to go in another room to wash up."

Zim nodded and stepped over to retrieve a nearby bar of cleansing chalk as Gaz dropped the dirty blanket on the floor and gathered some comfort clothes and other garments from her suitcase. A black sweater and sweat pants. Plus a wash cloth. She doubted Zim had a working shower around so Gaz would have to make do with a sponge style bath with the cleansing gel and wash her hair in the kitchen sink. By then Gir would hopefully have an edible afternoon breakfast finished. They had been running on empty for far too long.

* * *

After eating their extremely late breakfast, Gaz asked Gir to clear the table. She had managed to wash out the fake antennae, but the green skin dye was a more limited success. Even with the cleansing gel, a wash cloth and a bucket wasn't up for the job. There were green streaks, lines and blotches all over her, but most of the blotches were covered up by her clothes. She still looked a bit of a mess, but at least the putrid odor was gone.

She left Gir to dispose of the dirty dishes, however he did that. Hopefully it involved cleaning them. Computer interrupted what ever she was going to do next. "Master, Mistress. An Irken fast courier ship is approaching the house. ETA five minutes. It has a delivery."

"Here, Zim sit down," she said, directing Zim to the couch. "Let me take care of this, okay? I think I can handle a delivery. Just take it easy today. You've been through enough."

Zim nodded his consent and took a position on the couch. Gaz sat with him, waiting for the arrival. They didn't know what to expect. Eventually a knock sounded at the door. Gaz got up. "Who is it?" she called out.

"Special delivery from Tallest Red and Purple for Governor Zim and Lady Gaz," came the muffled answer.

"Computer, scan outside the door," Gaz commanded. "Is there anything dangerous?"

"Negative. I read two minimal signatures. Small Irken power supplies in standby mode."

Gaz quietly opened the door to see a small Irken with a hand lift carrying two brown packages. One was a two foot box. The other stacked vertically behind it was about four feet high. On the street was an Irken version of a medium sized moving van. Without wheels and floating above the pavement and that had just flown in from the sky. What was it with people in this city? They never noticed anything. Maybe it was something in the water.

The small Irken was reading his paperwork on a computer Pad and had not seen the door open. Gaz cleared her throat. The Irken looked from his Pad and straight at her thighs. Then he gazed upward to find where her head was located. She was on the shorter side as humans go, but she towered above this Irken.

"Lady Gaz! I did not expect you to personally come to pick up a delivery yourself. It is a privilege."

This response was a bit of a surprise to Gaz. "You recognize me?"

"Of course. We all saw you on last night's broadcast. You're as famous as Zim is!"

This did not help Gaz's mood. "Infamous is more like it," she muttered.

"You are the only non-Irken to be granted Irken citizenship and bonded to a governor. You were also made Lady of an entire planet, by the Tallest themselves! There are only a few hundred bondmates in all of Irk! And you are a Taller. Of course you are famous."

She turned her attention to the Irken. It almost sounded like he looked up to her, and not in a literal sense, which he was also doing. "How come you are making deliveries? I thought all Irkens were running around conquering the galaxy."

The Irken looked back down at his Pad. "Most are. Others of us are deemed undesirable and rejected for service by the control brains. We are assigned to menial support jobs that aren't entrusted to non-Irkens. Plus we are cheaper than robots. So I was programmed for logistical delivery instead. Sign here, please."

"What makes you unsuitable? I see nothing wrong with you." Gaz asked, signing for the packages.

"I am a quarter inch too short," the Irken replied with sadness.

Gaz paused after signing the form at the indicated space. "That is so…" She caught herself before she could go on. "What does height have to do with anything?"

The Irken below her just stared at her. She had clearly blown his mind. Gaz returned the Pad to the Irken. "Where do you want these taken?" he asked, recovering quickly.

"The living room is fine," she instructed.

The Irken pulled the hand lift carrying the packages into the living room and deposited them in the middle of the floor. He had been looking only at the floor to prevent the lift from catching on anything. He looked up and saw Zim sitting on the couch. "Governor Zim! You're a taller too! I can't believe I got to meet both of you! No one will believe me! Can I have your autographs? Please?"

Zim turned a confused look toward Gaz, who nodded. Zim took the small book and writing rod held out to him from the Irken. He signed his new full name: Governor Zim Membrane. Gaz took them and signed her own name, then returned it to the Irken who seemed almost ready to burst with joy. She nodded a thanks to Zim and escorted the small Irken out the door and off the property.

The Irken climbed back into the delivery ship. Gaz spoke up before he lowered the canopy. "I wish to ask you a question."

"Of course, Lady Gaz. Anything."

"Why do you seem so joyful at meeting us? We thought every Irken would think we are, well, contemptible if not sickening."

The Irken seemed to grow a bit nervous. "Lady Gaz, the vast majority do. But some of us smallest could see what happened. We saw you stand up to the Tallest in Zim's behalf. No Irken does this. Not for us undesirables. We saw that you have concern for an Irken defective. All non-Irkens hate us, especially the lowest ones because we are the easiest to get to. It may be distasteful but it is understandable that if Zim started a bond, it would be not be with an Irken. He did not have a choice when it did happen. He has been cut off from his own kind."

He explained further. "We may be smallest, that doesn't make us stupid. Some of us actually look up to Zim because he should be the lowest of the low, yet he always beats the odds every time. The most of us can't."

"Thank you," Gaz said. "He'll be glad to hear someone from his world thinks so."

Gaz went back inside as the delivery ship rose into the sky and out of sight. As usual, no one noticed a thing.

"What was that all about?" Zim asked as Gaz closed the front door.

She turned to look at him. "It seems that not all Irkens hate you, Zim. That one was one of the few that look up to you."

Zim didn't say anything. At the moment he didn't know how to accept the knowledge. His view of things had been torn apart and he was still trying to recover. Plus those mystery packages were still looming in the middle of the living room. He got up off the couch and began helping Gaz unwrap the packages. Zim worked on the larger one and Gaz took the smaller box.

Once the box was opened and the packing material removed, Gaz backed away quickly with huge eyes. "Zim!" she cried.

Dib had told her some things about it, but she was completely unfamiliar with the device in this state. But she heard in his evil-alien rants that this thing could seek and attach on its own. She had already had that experience with her necklace. Zim hadn't finished unpacking the larger box yet. But on hearing Gaz's cry he leapt back, four spider limbs from his PAK pointing at the smaller upturned carton and charging up to fire.

Sticking halfway out of the overturned parcel was an Irken PAK. It was meant for Gaz.

After a full minute of nothing happening, Zim retracted his PAK's spider limbs. "Gaz-partner, it is okay. The PAK is not active. Gir! Remove this PAK and place it in the bio-hazard bay!"

A red eyed Gir in commando mode came in to the room from the kitchen and saluted. "Yes, Master. I obey!" His Mistress Gazzy's well being had just been threatened. The robot took the PAK and disappeared down an elevator with it.

"Computer! Conduct a thorough examination. Make absolutely sure it is only what it appears to be and not a greater threat to my Gaz-partner. Zim does not want any surprises hidden inside."

Computer acknowledged, and Zim went to Gaz. They didn't say anything. Both were looking at the four foot tall package still standing in the living room. They looked at each other briefly and stepped up to the wrapped object. Brown wrapping was removed and packing material pulled away. Zim stepped back once more, unable to take his eyes off of the thing before him.

Gaz looked at it, circling around the device. Once the packing material was removed, the apparatus was about three and a half feet high and looked sort of like a large Earth blender without the spinning blades. The transparent cylindrical tube that made up most of the object was completely filled with a green liquid and seemed self-contained.

"Zim? What is it?" she asked. Dealing with the surprise of the new PAK had brought Zim back for a moment, but he seemed to be deteriorating once more as he stared at the device.

He looked at her with an odd expression. "Why? Why must they distress Zim?"

"Zim, tell me what this thing is," Gaz said, moving to stand next to him.

"It… it's a smeet chamber."

Talk about not being ready for something. Even Gaz's mind shut down for a minute.

She pulled Zim away and took the elevators down in to the base, just to get him away from the sight. She sat him down on his hammock and sat next to him. "Zim, you were grown in one of those, weren't you?"

He nodded.

"Zim, try not to let it get to you. It was a sick prank, and your Tallest are acting like human teenagers." To an Irken that was a grave insult, but it fit.

Zim turned to Gaz. "Gaz-partner, why are you crying?"

"Crying? Zim, I'm not cry-" she touched near her eyelid and wiped away unexpected moisture. "Zim, what's going on with me?"

Zim didn't answer for a moment. "Perhaps the chamber reminded you of something in your own culture."

Gaz mentally scoffed at the idea. Humans didn't grow in smeet chambers. They grew in human mothers. There was nothing in human cul-. Then it hit her. It wasn't culture, or uncomfortable ideas, or even a sick joke. It was inborn female instinct woven in her DNA. It may not be active for several years yet, but even Gaz had a maternal instinct. Something in her was crying for something that would now never happen.

"Zim? It's not culture. It's biology." Gaz carefully said. It was a most uncomfortable subject, but she could skirt around the edges enough to explain. "I'm a human female, and part of me is designed to be like that smeet chamber. I think my future instincts are mourning for something that will never happen. I'm bonded to someone who isn't my species. I'll never, um…"

"Zim does not understand personally, but understands instinct and programming. Is it a part of you that hasn't developed yet realizing has lost its purpose for existing? Useless?"

The girl thought for a moment. She guessed it was close enough. "Yeah, something like that." Gaz paused and continued. "Zim, I don't want to be just the doomer I was. It costs too much now."

The alien looked around the room. It was ironic that this conversation was taking place in this lab, or maybe it was just the perfect place. He turned to look at his bondmate. They were both having a tough time. But he once decided to protect her from loss. It was a minor thing, uncomfortable to contemplate at this time, but there was something he could do.

"Gaz-partner. Dry your eyes and come back in about an hour."

"Okay, Zim," Gaz replied. "I think I feel like sending a message to your Tallest about their gift."

"Don't do anything drastic," Zim advised. "You are a citizen now. They are your Tallest too. Be careful."

"Same to you, Zim," she replied as she walked out.

Gaz entered the computer lab. "Computer, have the delivery ship recalled at once. And bring up an inventory of scrapped devices. Zim gave me a power cell once and I can't remember what it was from. Once I find it, have Gir bring it up to the living room with some wrapping paper and ribbon. I want to send a present to the Tallest."

It didn't take long to find the device she was thinking of, as it was listed under 'B.' Gaz headed up to the living room.

* * *

The door knocked once more, and Gaz opened it again. The delivery Irken looked up at her. Her eyes were red and puffy. "Lady Gaz! What is wrong? Did I break something?"

"No, you did your job well. Come on in. We're almost ready." She waved the Irken inside before the neighbors could see. Not that they ever would, but still it wouldn't do to have an obvious alien hanging around Zim's front door.

The Irken stepped inside and stopped at the sight, nervous. He had never seen a SIR unit before. They were supposed to be the most fierce, destructive, and ruthless robots ever created. Their workings and capabilities were so secret they were only entrusted to Invaders.

It was wearing some decorative wrapping paper and a bow. "Look, Mistress Gazzy! I'm a happy meal!" the robot cried out.

There seemed to be something wrong with this particular SIR unit.

"That's nice, Gir," the human said as she sat back down and finished putting the final touches on wrapping her package.

"Lady Gaz, is that what they sent you?" asked the Irken, looking at the smeet chamber.

"Yeah," she muttered in a dark voice. "We don't think it's funny. At all."

The Irken looked back at Lady Gaz. "Why would they send you a smeet chamber? It's not like you can-" His voice froze at the look he was receiving from the human.

But after a moment she looked down at the floor. "I know, but to them it's a sick joke. Zim is having enough difficulty without this."

The Irken could see that this human was suffering too. "You care for Zim even though he is a defect." he commented once more.

When the human looked back at him, there was a small tear in her eye. "I think he has a malfunctioning PAK and it doesn't stop him. And also he cares for me in his own way. I find myself caring more for him every day and am unable to turn back."

This Irken did not really understand. "What is that like?" he asked. It seemed strange.

"What's your name?" she asked instead.

"Beed. But most Tallers call me Bad."

Gaz stood up and handed him the package. It rattled and seemed to be broken. "Beed, take this straight to the _Massive._ Give it to someone who will take it to the Tallest and undock at once. Then go back to your job." She handed him a set of travel orders. "If you find yourself in trouble, use this to come back here. We will cover the expense. I'm sure we can find something for you to do around here."

Beed turned with the package under his arm to leave.

"And that, Beed, is a little of what it feels like to be cared for, even though you are a smaller."

The door closed behind him. Never could he have ever imagined that a taller would even take time to think about looking out for a smaller like him. For an Irken smallest this was like a miracle. He could be at the _Massive_ in about an hour if he used the wormhole drive of his fast courier ship. A package from a planetary Governor (or Lady) to the Tallest were priority assignments after all. Especially this one.

* * *

Gaz asked the computer to move the smeet chamber to the medical bay and for Gir to clean up the discarded wrappings on the floor. She let herself show a faint smile. No, she wasn't just a doomer anymore. That shell had been broken open. But it was good to be able to pull it out when it was needed. Plus being nice to the unwanted underlings could cause headaches for other tallers later on. Every snowball started small, but if they rolled on long enough they could smash a car flat.

Gaz walked back down to the computer lab and sat down for the first time without someone falling apart on her or needing her in who knows how long. She had a little time to herself. But all this was taking a toll on her as well. She pulled a card out of her pocket. Gaz was in over her head in many ways, and had been thinking about this. She might not get another chance.

"Computer, I don't know how this all works but I'd like to place an international call to England. I could use some human advice right now."

"Yes, Mistress. Just give me the number and I will route it through here."

She read off the number on the card. "Thank you, Computer. Um, could I have a bit of privacy?"

"Of course, Mistress. Just press a key when you need me."

Over the speakers Gaz could hear a tone, then ringing. She was very nervous.

* * *

The phone rang, waking the man up. He moaned and looked at the clock. He had been asleep for only an hour. Not only that, but he had just got home from a very long trip. He was not amused. He picked up his phone and answered it. It had better not be the base. He had another day on leave and it had better not be canceled.

"Hello?" he groggily mumbled, trying to rub the sleep from his eyes.

"Um, Hello? Uh, I hope I have the right number. But someone gave me this card and said if I needed help with a soldier to call and talk to his wife."

"Listen, it's almost midnight here. Could you please tell me your name?" he asked.

"This is Gaz. I was under the name '_The Wind.'"_

The first name didn't ring any bells at that time of night, but the second name woke Alpha of CWZ's Razor Squadron up. "_Wind,_ is that really you?"

"Alpha?"

"Are you alright?"

"Not really. Actually, Zim and I have been in crisis mode since we last saw you. This is the first time I've had a chance to talk to someone. He's in bad shape and I don't know what I'm doing." There was a sniff on the other end of the line.

"Okay, just hang on a minute." Alpha rolled over and began nudging his wife.

She slapped his hand away in sleepiness, and told him to go away.

He kept prodding her. "Love, it's for you. Sounds like a wife emergency. Her guy is in bad shape."

The woman slowly sat up and took the phone. "Hello? What's your name, Hon?"

"It's Gaz. I… I don't know how to do this or what to say. There are things I can't talk about. I don't even know what to call you."

"It's okay. Call me Mrs. Alpha. I can understand that you have to keep some things secret. I do too. It comes with being married into the military. How long have you known him?"

"Most of my life. He's a, um, foreign exchange student that transferred in when we were in elementary skool. He's been here ever since."

"You know him well?" Mrs. Alpha asked.

"Better than anyone else on this planet," came the answer.

"What is he to you right now?"

"I don't understand. He's been hurt by his own people. I've always been a doomer, not a healer."

"Doomer?"

"Enforcer. I didn't like anybody. Wanted to be left alone and punished those who bothered or annoyed me."

"I see," Mrs. Alpha said. She didn't really. "I guess what I'm asking is what your relationship is."

"It's complicated. He became my friend last week. We've been partners. Good ones. We, um, got married last night by accident. He tried to get help to fix the paperwork, but his leaders turned on him. The lazy scumbags told him that since they bond for life that he would have to dispose of me-"

Mrs. Alpha's eyes practically exploded wide at that. "You mean-"

"Yeah. He stood up for me, said he couldn't, that he was compelled to protect me. He's not supposed to be able to care like that. So they just changed his mission and made it so that he'd stay in his exile forever. Made me a citizen and gave me a title of Lady and cut us off. He started to look into it, and saw that he was a defective, and defectives are supposed to be destroyed. His whole world collapsed and I wasn't sure he would survive the night. I did what I could do, arranged for supplies and things he'd need. But I fell apart too and he ended up taking care of me all through the night and morning as I slept-"

Mrs. Alpha had flung her bedsheets off and hurried down the stairs. Alpha followed, seeing his wife start a large pot of coffee. What ever was going on was really bad.

His wife stopped the rambling on the other end of the line. "Hon, hon. Slow down. Now take a deep breath. How old are you?"

"Seventeen," came the reply.

Mrs. Alpha's stomach fell to her feet. "And him?"

"To be honest, none of us know. His records say eighteen."

Mrs. Alpha covered the pickup of the phone and looked at her husband. "My god. Alpha, they're just kids!" She turned her attention back to the phone. "Okay, honey. Let's start at the beginning."

As she listened, she didn't just listen to the words. She could hear the familiar pauses when secrets one lived with everyday required a spur of the moment cover story that stayed true to the situation. This girl was a veteran at this, that was obvious. She began writing short phrases on a notepad so Alpha could follow the plot.

_Guy experimented on. Trained from walking age. Child soldier. Infiltrator, special unit. Experiment defective, should have been terminated. Type of soldier you want fighting for other side. Quit first banishment. Sent on fake mission to keep exiled. Never meant to succeed. Cover Up. Abandoned. Never knew. _She stopped writing as the story and occasional cover story grew more complex and secrets caused it to become more fragmented. It sounded difficult to believe.

"Excuse me, honey. I need to ask my husband something." She turned to Alpha, holding a hand over the phone. "You met these kids? What's your take on the guy?"

"He's been well trained. No one at the convention could stand against those two. He has experience. Most likely wounded or hurt, had reconstructive surgery. We got the feeling that he's one of those people that don't officially exist. Real black ops stuff. The burn-before-reading then self-terminate sort of classified. They called him the Whirlwind for a reason at the convention. He's protective of her with a maximum use of force sort of mentality, and that was just in the game. The others said she was armed with hand weapons in her boots so she is tough. We all had bets on them being married before we even met them."

"You have pictures of them?"

Alpha went and came back with a laptop. He had loaded his cell phone pictures before his flight home. He brought them up, flipping through them. He hadn't really taken any of these two. There were only a couple taken when his team was walking with them up and down the main platform. He brought up one and turned the computer to show his wife.

She looked at it. A happy costumed young lady was with an excited costumed young man. They did look pretty close. But the girl's expression held a bit of trepidation. She used the touchpad to enlarge a section around her neck. The shot zoomed in to show a bit of thick black necklace showing from under the uniform.

"Alpha, do you have one from behind? In an earlier ramble she said something about a backpack."

Alpha clicked on the previous picture. Why did his wife want a look at that?

She looked closer and closer at the screen. "Alpha, there are no straps on that backpack. It's not sewn into his clothing, and the clothes aren't sagging from the weight. Alpha! It looks like it's held in place by his _spine!_ She's holding back a lot, and there is plenty of cover stuff in her speech. But I believe her. She's not making up their story."

_Oh crap! _Alpha thought. He quickly deleted the photos and began repartitioning the hard drive. "Love, this phone call did not happen. I'll go to the base tomorrow and have the phone's entire memory wiped. We never saw this. Understand?" Whatever was going on was so far into black operations that just an accidental photo anywhere would land one in a whole world of trouble they wanted no part of. "Just… just help the girl, Love. Whatever is happening, she's so far into it there's no way out for her. So no more background and forget what you did not hear. We don't want to join them if they have to go into hiding."

Mrs. Alpha's eyes widened. Her husband was not the conspiracy sort, nor the type to freak out lightly. But this had him very alarmed. She nodded.

"Honey, what do you want to do?" she said.

"I want to help him get better. I want to help him build a new life. I'm all he has left."

"You know you are too young, and not prepared. Has he, um, made any demands of you? Like you moving in? Uh, other things?"

"No! Of course not. He wouldn't. He's less ready for that life than I am."

Mrs. Alpha let out a sigh of relief. "Okay. Now listen to me. You understand more than you think you do. You know what you're not ready for, and know better than to try to move too fast. That's very good. But you have to make some decisions right now. As hard and uncomfortable as it may be, you have to set a course for yourself before you can help him. False or half-hearted hopes, or indecision could do far more damage that what has all ready been done. You don't want to lead him on even by accident.

"I'm not going to sugar coat this. However it happened, you are his wife and he is your husband. Do you want to one day build that life with him? Or do want to go your separate ways when this is over?"

"I..I can't leave him." the small voice at the other end of the line said.

"That's not what I asked. Do you want him to one day be a real husband for you?"

"I care so much, but until two weeks ago I didn't even want friends! I spent my life barricading myself from caring about anyone. But I can't anymore."

"Hey, there." The girl seemed on the edge of defensive panic whenever an inner barrier was approached. "Even I can hear how much you love him, and don't deny it. Just because you're not _in_ love with him doesn't mean you don't love. Being in love with someone takes time. Lots of time. You haven't had that yet. Let me try rephrasing the question. Can you imagine a life without him?"

* * *

Gaz sat before Computer in silence. The question brought back a particular vision of her recent nightmare. "I… had a nightmare last night. I found… Zim's… he was lying in a street. He was… was... Even in my dream my world fell apart and I kept screaming and screaming and I couldn't wake up. Zim woke me up. He held me and comforted me even though his own life had just been destroyed. I can't go back."

The voice on the other end said in a comforting tone "Do you want to share a life with him? It's test and trials? It's joys and blessings? Do you want to be his wife for real, not today, but when the time does come?"

Gaz looked deep inside herself. She didn't speak for two minutes. "Yes. I do. I love him. I don't want a life without him."

"Then just be what you are now, whatever that is. Don't force things to happen. Don't try to go fast or slow. Let it be natural for you, whatever that may be. Help him just keep putting one foot in front of the other. Keep him going, even if it's just going through the motions. Help him with his chores, hobbies, some activity." came the counsel.

"We both have these keepsake drawers. Notes and stuff between us over the years. They're almost identical. I have a scrapbook and thought we could put them together," Gaz said.

"Oh, honey. That is good. Real good. You two seem to have a very fine foundation to build on. As messed up as the situation has been or how he came into your life, few people have it as good. Trust me on that."

The voice on the other end continued. "Now, be there if he needs to talk. It doesn't matter if you don't understand, just let him talk if he needs to. If he speaks out of line a little, and I mean if he doesn't realize what he implied or said, be easy with him. Count to ten or something. But be firm if its needed. Be his guide for the next step, not the whole journey. Only he can figure that part out."

"Thank you. I need to go now. I won't forget this."

* * *

On board the _Massive,_ Red and Purple were kicking back and relaxing, enjoying a Zim free day. One of the crewmen came forward with a wrapped package. "Delivery from Lady Gaz of Earth to the Tallest."

"Oooooh." The both said in anticipation.

Purple shook it. There were the sounds of unhealthy rattling inside. "Sound's broken," he commented.

Purple ripped off the blue bow and decorative wrapping paper. He pulled off the top and nothing happened for a second. Then a brief shower of confetti burst up into the air. Purple reached in and picked up the note that was inside.

_ Dear Tallest. I have found the smeet chamber you sent us to be a rather sick joke at our expense. I am not laughing. Leave Zim alone and you may never have to hear from us again. Or perhaps next time I won't accidentally dropkick one of these. Next time it will be accidentally powered up and armed. You know how we humans are stupid like that._

_ Lady Gaz Membrane._

Red took out the smashed Black Hole Projector from the box. He looked at Purple. "Okay, even I have to admit the girl has talent. Too bad she's just human. At least she is Zim's problem."

* * *

On Irk in a snack bar was a crowd of various sized off-duty Irkens. It was loud and obnoxious. A few were crude guards making derogatory jokes. More and more were about the latest Zim broadcast. Many included Lady Gaz. In one corner was where the smallest ones were collected, because it was the worst place in the building and no one else wanted it. One small Irken got up to leave. He had enough.

"Where are you going? It's still early," one of the other smallest asked.

"I can't stand to listen to those bruisers talk garbage about Lady Gaz like this. They don't know anything and are just muscle without a control brain. I'm going for some air."

Another spoke up. "Yeah, like you know anything either. Even though she stood up a little for Zim, she hardly moved or spoke on the broadcast. You can't know anything from that."

"Hah! Shows what you know," the standing smallest spoke out. "I actually met her today on my delivery route! She actually stopped to talk with me. She gave me her autograph and helped get Zim's too!"

"Signing for a package and told to get lost does not count as an autograph."

An autograph book was produced with two long signatures inside. One of them was definitely not written by an Irken hand.

"That can't be real, Beed. Why would she?"

"What, you want to see for yourself? I can prove it all."

With that, smallest Beed pulled a Pad from his PAK and plugged a small thin spider limb into it. His memories of the encounter recorded by his PAK started to play back. More smallests came to see what was going on, and Beed had to restart the recording several times.

When it was finished, the large group was silent under the continued twisted and sick jokes heard around them.

"She's a Taller!"

"She was nice to you!"

"Was even hurting for Zim. A defect!"

"She was concerned about me being in trouble just for delivering a package. Gave me an escape route. Even offered me a job. Me! A smallest, working for a Lady! Can you imagine?"

One of the things about the PAK, while it did record visual images, it did not process information visually. It computed in simple terms. Things like 'height is superior.' 'Irkens are the best.' 'Respect your Tallers.' Of course nobody ever thought to make sure that a PAK understood the difference between an Irken and an Irken citizen. The issue never came up before because only a crazy lunatic would ever think there would be a difference between the two.

Each smallest, not programmed to be Irken soldiers, recognized the towering image of Gaz, an Irken citizen as a Taller even though she was obviously human. True, she was fairly hideous to look at, but she was tall and a citizen. Gaz was not just a Taller, but a recognized Lady of the Empire by the Tallest themselves. And she was willing to stand up to the tall and look out for the small.

And a rightful Lady of the Empire was being the subject of malicious jokes and sneers by several not tremendously bright Irken guards. Several seats were pushed back.

"Hey! We don't like how you are talking about Lady Gaz like that!"

"Really, puny? Well I think she's a-" and the guard recited a rather long string of obscene slurs.

And just like that Lady Gaz of the Empire became _their_ Lady Gaz. She did not care about height or status. Such things meant nothing to her. She had shown concern about what would happen to a smallest due to her own actions as a Taller and provided a way out for him. She cared very much for a defective, was that defective's bondmate. She had said "how dare you" to the _Tallest_, objecting to their treatment of defective Zim.

It is odd that in Earth dogs, it is not the large ones that you had to watch out for. They could hurt more, true. But they are more calm in general. It is the small ones that can be the most vicious, ferocious and nasty of them all.

There were five off-duty guards. There were thirty smallests. When it was over, _nobody_ in that establishment was willing to say anything close to disrespectful about Lady Gaz of Earth.

* * *

She found Zim as he finished working in front of a piece of equipment in the auxiliary lab. "Gaz-partner, Zim has something for you." He held a very small printout in both hands. "This was very uncomfortable to do, but you were feeling a future loss because of the smeet chamber. Part of you began to mourn. Your instinct says it is impossible now."

He held out the printout. "Zim has the lab, the equipment, and experience. There is no automatic loss for you, Gaz-partner."

"What is it?" she asked, taking the small print. She looked at it.

"It is a simulation. Zim has been making creatures for a very long time," he informed her.

It was a picture. The form looked a lot like Gaz did in the Irken costume, but was a lot younger with deep red human eyes and much paler green tinted skin. The hair was a familiar purple with semi-curly antennae. There were four fingers on each hand. Nose and ears were very small but present.

A simulated smeet daughter. A hybrid image of Zim and Gaz.

Gaz had to admit it was creepy in a mad-scientist sort of way, but it was sweet too. Zim was just trying to show comfort in an instinctively sensed loss about what the future may or may not hold. It was just way too soon. So why couldn't she stop looking at it? She finally put it in her pocket.

"Thanks Zim. Come on. I have something for us to work on," she said.

* * *

Gaz led Zim into the living room carrying a small box and a large book under her arm. She sat down on the couch, placing the book beside her and holding the box in her lap.

"Zim, could you bring your drawer over here?" she asked.

"What drawer?"

"That one, over by the front door," she responded, pointing at the end table. "It's okay, Zim. I know what's in it, that it is very private for you. I have something private here too."

The alien nervously went and pulled out the specified drawer and brought it over. Gaz patted the couch next to her, so Zim sat down at the indicated space. Gaz opened her box and showed Zim its contents. They were a mirror image of the contents of his own drawer. Notes, pictures, bits of debris turned into mementos. Little bits from Zim to Gaz, from Gaz to Zim, going back years. The girl opened the book next to her. It was blank.

"People glue little things in these. Sometimes random things, or personal memories. I thought we could do something like that with ours. Maybe it will help."

With that Gaz began assembling her assortment of keepsakes, pasting them in chronological order with the glue stick that came with the scrapbook. Zim began handing her his collection one at a time. Some of them Gaz hadn't seen in years, the handwriting her own. As they did so, they began to talk about something other than the past few days and the new situation they were in.

But as the project advanced, they couldn't help but see a slow but sure pattern emerging. So slow that years passed without it being noticed. A certain parallel correlation between the two. A connection that was, at least on the surface of things at the beginning, denied and yet not exactly resisted.

"Gaz? Do you see it too?" Zim asked.

She pasted another note, another signed picture of commendation. "Yeah, I see it."

A slow but sure gravitation toward a tolerated and standoffish relationship, then more than tolerated but still standoffish, followed by an accepted one of friendship/partnership at the end.

"Gaz? It seems that Zim was in the first stage of bonding for a very long time. Zim had no way of knowing or understanding."

"It's okay, Zim." She patted his hand. "Did you know that, for I don't know how many years, everyday at school I would look to see if you had left me something in my locker? I never really noticed until now. Never thought about it."

They didn't say anything more until both the box and the drawer was empty. They set both aside and held the scrapbook between them. "I have one last thing to add," Gaz said. She pulled out a few folded pieces of torn out paper and began to unfold and straighten them. She had been carrying this with her where ever she went for over a week, ever since that night she saw Zim's memories and he read her diary. The papers were then tacked at the corners with glue and added to the scrapbook. Zim began to read what was written.

_Dear Zim, if you are reading this, then you have found out some things about your mission and perhaps your PAK. About your leaders, about everything you thought you knew. I don't know all of it, just a few scraps. I did not want to keep this from you, but even if I didn't want to protect you from the hurt it would cause, you could not believe me._

_ You were never sent to my planet to succeed in conquering it. They will never support or supply you enough to succeed for if you do, you would end up back on Irk messing up their plans and causing havoc again. It is what you are meant to do, and you are a natural. But it is not valued on your planet because they want a pawn that will fit into their war machine, not Mister Destructo that derails everything around you including them. Zim, this planet was not supposed to be here, and your loyalty to your Tallest, your dedication to your mission would have had you searching for a non-existent target until you died of an accident or old age._

_ Zim, I am glad they sent you. If you hadn't come, I would have been killed along with the rest of my species when the Planet Jackers came to toss my world into their star. I saw what you did to save us, save me. You have succeeded in saving my planet, and on more than one occasion. You didn't care about that at the time, but perhaps you care a little about me now. I know that you must think you are a failure because you didn't conquer my world. But in a strange way, that is really the success of your mission. Because your true mission was to fail in the conquest. The Irken Empire doesn't want Earth. It was supposed to be your prison because you can't take no for an answer, and you can't stop trying._

_ I know that you have troubles you can't admit to. Perhaps even unaware of. That your PAK is at fault, and does not regulate things very well. But I wouldn't change it, because then you wouldn't be you anymore. Zim, don't think you are a fool, or stupid, or an idiot. I thought those things about you until tonight when I saw your memories. But I realized that your not being aware of all this is probably your way of protecting yourself because you most likely can't survive the realization on your own. Your PAK is defective, and you have been taught all your life that defectives should be deactivated. I am afraid of what you will do when you find out. But your PAK is not you, Zim. I just hope I won't be too late when you find out, that I will be there for you. Despite my best efforts, you have become a part of my life, and I can't bear to lose those who become a part of it. It's why I am the way I am. It hurts too much to lose people that mean something to me, so I don't let them mean anything. But now you do, my one and only friend._

_ Zim, you have many great qualities under your dedication to your twisted mission and the things you've done to try to complete it. I don't want to cause you to feel insulted at a time like this, but you are not perfect. But you are dedicated, faithful even if it is in a twisted way, loyal, never giving up, never quitting. You are fearless, the only one that is not afraid of me and even willing to stand up to me. You are bold, inventive, and willing to stand and fight for what you believe. Or at least what you were programmed to believe by your PAK. But you are willing to take a stand nonetheless. You have even put up with Gir's insanity for all these years._

_ I could probably go on, but I think I've written all that is needed. I am here for you, Zim. I know you can't understand what a friend is. The concept is too alien for you, but you have one with me. I am your friend. I will stand with you through this. Be brave, be strong, be the Zim I know you can be._

A tear began to fall from Zim's eye, and Gaz reached over to wipe it away. She let her hand fall to grasp Zim's as she scooted up against him on the couch. The alien didn't need to ask her if it was true or not.

She whispered into where his ear would have been if he had them. "Zim, I know everything seems bad, that you've been maltreated, used, and betrayed by the ones you were dedicated to pleasing. You've been so good to me these past two weeks, and I caused the destruction your life, your purpose. I'm sorry you've been hurt because of me."

"It was not due to you," Zim told her. "Your actions may have triggered this, but it is not your fault. Zim made decisions while you tried to protect me. You did not cause this, just caused the disclosure of what was happening. Gaz, you were there. You were not too late."

Gaz looked into his solid red eyes and saw so much misery and pain in them, the dullness within, but that last ember of the fire that had been there was still present. Zim was still hanging on to that last thread. But perhaps it was growing a little brighter.

"Zim, " she said, motioning to the scrapbook, "this is our story. I think this could use one more entry tonight. Will you help me?" she asked. The former Invader nodded, so she let go of Zim's hand and took a nearby pencil. She began to write starting with the date.

_ Last night Zim and I won the CWZ competition in Vegas, Nevada. He has been good to me these past two weeks of preparation, going above and beyond for me so many times. Despite myself, I find he's been measuring up lately. I've finally seen the real Zim, the one underneath the Invader._

_ Afterward, Zim and I were inadvertently bonded according to Judgementian legal custom and legally married according to the slack local laws of my own homeworld, with the permission of my dad who was probably not paying attention at the time. Zim and I weren't either. We have now been officially recognized as bondmates by Zim's government too. His original mission was canceled and we both have been given a new one, to protect my world. It is still a ruse to keep Zim here, but I think it frees him to become more than they would ever have allowed him to be. He has free rein now._

_ I am now an Irken citizen, and a Lady of this daft Empire. Zim is now the hands-off military governor of Earth. Sort of all dressed up with no where to go I guess. Right now Zim is having difficulty and I'm trying to help him through it. Well, to be honest we both are having difficulty._

_ We're not ready for any of this. I'm too young to be married, never paid attention to such things as I was only interested in keeping other people away. We aren't even out of hi-skool yet. Zim was not educated about this sort of thing at all. Not even about his own make-up regarding bonding. He's not ready either, but he won't make any demands of me. We're just trying to get through all this right now._

_ But I do care about Zim. Maybe I should say my Zim, for he has undeniably become very important to me. Zim cares for me as well. He even gave up his own world for my sake. It is very difficult for me to get out, as I have been closed off from others for so long, but I told Zim that I love him. And I do. Maybe not the way a married person is supposed to, but this all happened without warning and so fast. We never built that kind of relationship, but I suppose if all this didn't happen this way, we never would have. I guess Zim hasn't been the only one that's lived in denial._

_ Zim does feel something for me. Very much. But it's not human style love. He is a different species after all. We're complicated, and I get the impression that Irken's aren't when it comes to emotions. He's in the second of three stages of the bonding process. I think it's similar and is comprised of the same things that make up human love, but is different with a totally different process. Perhaps instead of different types like we have, Zim has different degrees of the same thing. Perhaps that is why he doesn't connect with those around him. It's not how it works for them. But it's not like I'm an expert. But something tells me someday I will be, even though I'm not ready to think about future things yet._

_ I am, after all, Zim's wife. I can't say it. It's easier to write stuff down right now. I can't even contemplate building a married sort of relationship at the moment. I shouldn't have had to for several more years. I can't even write that he is my, well, you know. Bondmate is much easier for now. Zim is my bondmate and we have the necklaces to prove it. I will wear mine for the rest of my life. Not that these collars give us much of a choice, but I still stand by my Zim. And I will doom any who would harm him. _That_ is guaranteed._

Gaz finished and Zim took the pencil. He didn't write as much.

_Zim is aware of the difference humans have in this process, and Gaz-partner has found herself having skipped most of them. She is a very astute human. Neither of us have been informed of much of what we need to know. But Zim knows Gaz-partner is correct, that a building between us will be necessary. Zim does not know what to call what he has for his Gaz-partner. She also deserves another title, but is not ready to be called such yet. But Zim will think of a suitable one._

_ For an Irken, Zim does not know much about this bonding process. Only it's symptoms which do not translate well into human. Call stage one: esteem. Stage two: importance. Stage three: precious. Gaz is of utmost importance to Zim, and becoming more. These stages are life-long, it is encoded in our DNA. Zim does not regret bonding with his Gaz-partner. But Zim wishes also for her to be his Love Pig. Zim has learned that this is important too._

_Signed,_

_Governor Zim Membrane - Lady Gaz Membrane_

Gaz had signed her name, and then read what Zim had written. "Zim?"

Zim looked back at her to give her his attention.

"Zim, you want me to be your Love Pig? What is a Love Pig?" Gaz asked. It sounded familiar, but she had not heard that term in a long, long time.

"Zim sees others at skool being Love Pigs. They are not even bonded yet." the alien sitting next to her said.

_A couple, _she thought. Zim wanted to start a relationship with her. A real one.

How could she explain this? "Zim, right now you've lost just about everything except me. You're hanging on by a thread. I'm like your lifeline right now. I see it in your eyes. You need to build a new life, not just one relationship. I don't want to become your crutch. It wouldn't be good for you, even hinder you."

"Somehow Zim finds it unlikely Gaz-partner is the sort who would tolerate allowing anyone becoming forever dependent on you. That is not your way. And as you have already noted, Zim is different. But Zim also recognizes that we both are like flying in the fog. Zim understands."

Gaz spoke, taking his hand in hers. "Zim, I'm not saying I won't. Just take a few days to recover more. Let me talk to my brother. He won't take all this well, but I should be straight with him. I don't want him causing problems for you." She paused to give Zim's hand a short squeeze before letting go. "I will be your Love Pig, Zim. When you are feeling better. Just don't expect much in the way of mushy stuff."

"Good. Zim does not think he is ready for the more disgusting human affections he sees at skool. It is quite revolting."

"Yeah," Gaz said in return. She turned another page and pasted a picture of a simulated child in the center of the page. "You probably once thought the same thing about having a human for a bondmate, and look where we are now."


	16. Chapter 15

A/N: Once again thanks to my reviewers: MojaveRuler151, Kazehana23, InfiniteReader, Zerg170, FanFicNewb, memmek10k, EduTorresD, Todyo, Xeno Tyrant, Kaylee Or Something, and Pokemon Warrior Mew.

Thanks also to all those who favorite and follow this story. Seeing the notifications that another person did this contributes too!

Todyo: I get what you say about feeling like I rushed them into it. I got that feeling too as I wrote it. Part of this is that with my disability, I don't really comprehend how people connect at this point. As far as I can tell, it's entirely random. Another part is that as much as I love ZAGR, I just don't see it happening the way most people have written it: entirely human. So I decided to do something different: forget about the falling in love phase (its too human) and force the realization in a way that can't be ignored or denied, only accepted. I've always said that if you want to drive a point home, use a sledgehammer. So that's what I've done. The last part is by design, wanting to increase the pace of the story, not giving them time to fall back into their old ways before really coming to terms with all this. A big enough shock can allow a person to make dramatic changes in their perception and life very quickly. A single day can and does change the rest of one's life with a big enough event.

The end of the last chapter was Gaz following Mrs. Alpha's advice, setting a course. They now know they both want to pursue a real relationship, but Zim is still recovering. And let's face it, they don't know how to pursue a romantic one. Hope this explains why I wrote it the way I have. I also had to rewrite Mrs. Alpha's advice to Gaz three times or so before I posted it so it would fit with the end of chapter. (Actually, I wrote the entire chapter out of sequence in almost random order. Go A.D.D.!) But on your constructive criticism I did go back and found I could change a word or two toward the end and corrected an error that I let slip through. (Zim did not have an ear to whisper into.) Hopefully it will make it better. Thanks!

MojaveRuler151: I know many of you can't wait to see Dib's reaction. To be honest, I don't think I do a good Dib. Not really. But I'm sure Gaz will have a way to make it easier for her brother once the initial shock wears off. But I do have an idea of a few scenes. Probably won't be what you expect, but hopefully it will be interesting. First will be public, and Gaz will get mad. And not only at her brother. Well, good or bad, the wait is over.

Almost Pizza was from a Saturday Night Live commercial. It's so evil. Also I make reference to a paperweight on Irk. I figure they could use it for electronic sheeting that functions as paper does. Oh, as for the design of the ship Gaz bought? Yeah, I know it would look too much like an Earth design. But then again, why not? There are a lot of planets out there. I just like the design.

* * *

_ For Irkens who don't already know, there are three phases in our bonding process. They can be subtle, unnoticed, and can take many years or be dramatic and take place very rapidly such as on a battlefield. There is no set pattern, and is different for each bonding Irken. However, each stage is permanent so caution is warranted. NOTE: Each stage is on a personal rather than a professional level._

_ The first stage is the most difficult to detect and is the most common. It can be seen under the guise of giving deserved yet sincere compliments, tokens of a job well done and other gestures appropriate to the immediate circumstances while maintaining a certain distance. For a human, this might be classified as distant friendship, working comradeship, associates or for some as casual non-serious dating as insane as that sounds to Irken hearing. NOTE: This aspect of the human species is unnecessarily complicated, messy, and causing enormous headaches in the lives of all around them. Humans can enter this phase in minutes where Irkens can take days, months or years. There are exceptions among Irkens however, so contemplate the matter carefully. Also note that just being in the first stage does not mean that it will progress further. Nothing more is implied._

_ The second stage is far more substantial for an Irken and rare. It involves the concepts of personal partnership, mutual concern on a personal level, and going out of one's way for the other. The first blatant displays of concern for the bondmate's comfort and well being can be seen here, and a protective instinct for them will become amplified. To an Irken with an understanding of what is happening, this is a serious undertaking with intent to pursue a formal union with their future bondmate. The only human equivalent is a declaration of intentions, formal courtship and finally engagement (not the combat kind of engagement, as difficult as that is to imagine) to become a mated pair._

_ For a human however, this may be anywhere from an amplified version of stage one to something an Irken could be experiencing. Not recognizing which is which to a particular human's thinking is very insulting and they may retaliate. However, they will not tell you even if you ask. Humans seem to think giving out necessary information to prevent misunderstanding is considered rude. Stage two may also take time for an Irken, but may also be triggered by circumstances or personal events. So if an Irken is in stage one, taking on joint ventures in close quarters for lengths of time with the other may instigate entering into stage two._

_ The third stage is unimaginably rare among Irkens. It is a full and mutual joining. At times it may be difficult for an Irken to comprehend where one ends and the other begins. The human equivalent is something called marriage. Theirs is a legal, social and emotional joining. For an Irken, this stage is triggered or otherwise may happen overnight. A human on the other hand may require decades of marriage to reach what an Irken may achieve in hours. Humans rely on a mostly mental/emotional process that changes their makeup, and that is why it takes them so long. The Irken process involves more instinct in these changes. Emotions are present and important, yes, but are not the catalyst._

_ Once this stage is entered, deliberate separation from the bondmate for long and extended periods of time is impossible to contemplate, let alone initiate. Under no circumstances should anyone ever attempt to separate two Irken bondmates. Joint assignments will be required from now on. Attempts to force long term separation will be resisted with excessive force_. Do not mess with a bondmate! _Attempts to actually harm a bondmate __will __draw a response from the other. A rapid reaction, while possibly life threatening, is in reality the better response you could hope for. If there is not an immediate response, LEAVE THE GALAXY AT ONCE! However, this will not save you, just delay the inevitable. They will not stop until you have been found and remove you from ever being a threat again. In fact, other Irkens may join the hunt. A bonded Irken pair is so rare that deliberately and knowingly trying to harm a bondmate is almost a desecration on an instinctive level. If serious enough, the whole Empire may go on a galactic rampage against a single perpetrator. Understandably, this does not apply to other species who have bonded with an Irken._

_ The vast majority of humans are not suitable, most completely incompatible, as it should be. But not all humans are the same. My own bondmate suffered from abandonment issues during her childhood phases, and so was better able to adjust to how we Irkens bond. Few humans could have. Humans don't instinctively bond for life like we do. Most would like to, but it takes a lifetime of tremendous work for them. Being incapable of forsaking her, in the most literal sense, was something my bondmate could not have found within her own species. Being accepted as more than a defective plague could not have been found in mine. We couldn't have become the people we are now without each other._

_ Zim, get upstairs now. Gir has dinner ready. Gaz-blossom! Now I have to try to remember to edit out your interruption before it goes to print! Stupid dictation machine- I don't care, love. There is no way I'm going to guard your dinner from Gir again. Not after he-_

_Excerpt from "Bonding with Humans" by Governor Zim Membrane - Earth year 2046_

_Officially banned within the Irken Empire_

_Meekrob and The Resisty bestsellers._

_Current printing: 2.35 billion copies under 'Scandalous Material.'_

* * *

Gaz awoke the next morning alone in the hammock. There had been no need for Zim to sleep, so he hadn't joined her. Even though they were bonded, married, and had decided that they would pursue a real relationship in a little time, that would still have been too weird for them. On the first night they were in a crisis, and they had held on to each other out of mutual comfort and to help each other just get through the night. Now it was post-crisis, and things were now becoming real to them.

Not that she should really talk about weird. She and Zim were going about their relationship in completely reverse order. And that was ignoring the fact that Zim was an alien. Weird was everyday life for them.

She swung her feet out and hauled herself out of the hammock, taking her second blanket with her. The bad thing about waking up in an underground base was that one had no idea what time it was during morning disorientation. If it was even morning. It felt like morning. Mornings were evil in Gaz's opinion.

"Computer," Gaz called groggily. "What time is it? And where is Gir? I'd like to take a sponge bath before I get dressed."

"Mistress, it is now 8:37am. Gir is with Zim in the living room watching TV. I shall send him down with a pail of warm water for you at once."

Gaz rubbed the sleep from her eyes and went to gather some fresh clothes. "Thank you, Computer. How is Zim holding up?"

"Zim has been quiet, Mistress. He and Gir just watched TV all night long."

"Anything good?" she asked.

"Mistress, do infomercials about saving money with recycled dental floss and the health wonders of all natural mouse milk sound like Zim?" the Computer asked rhetorically.

Gaz didn't say anything as she waited for Gir to bring her pail of water. Then she went to the closet she had taken over as her bathing room. She washed off and changed. Most of the visible green streaks on her skin were gone now. At least what wasn't covered up by her clothes. It would take a shower to get most of the rest. She had only one more set of clothes, and might be able to get away with another morning of washing with just a washcloth. Tomorrow she would have to go home. She thought about it more as she washed her hair in the kitchen sink and brushed her teeth. No, she wouldn't go straight home. She'd head back from school. The question was, what was she going to do with Zim, and how was she going to handle Dib?

It was way too early in the day for such questions.

She entered the living room drying off her hair with a towel. Zim was still sitting on the couch. "Hey, Zim. How are you holding up?" she asked sitting next to him.

The alien was without his disguise. He hadn't worn it since the day of the convention. He looked away from the TV toward her. "Zim is still here, Gaz-pig."

"Excuse me?" she asked darkly.

"You wish to be Zim's love pig. Is this not a suitable title for you?" Zim asked, ignorant of the danger.

_Zim is not an idiot. Zim is not an idiot, _Gaz thought to herself repeatedly. "Zim, here's a tip from someone who cares for you. If you call any girl a pig, you are asking for a severe beating from said girl. If you call _me_ a pig ever again, you're doomed to spend the rest of eternity trapped in a closet with a horde of tarantulas."

"Uh…" stumbled Zim, his eyes wide. "Gaz-love?"

"Better," she said. "How about we just leave the pet names for now?"

Zim looked a bit dejected. She cut in. "Zim, I told you last night. There is going to be an us, but we have to do this the right way. That means getting you back on your feet." He just nodded. "Don't you think I deserve the best Zim possible?"

"Of course," he immediately responded.

"Then let's take this one step at a time. What have you been doing?"

"Watching TV," came the answer.

"Anything good?" Gaz asked.

"This is what is on."

_In other words no. But then the mouse milk should have been a clue to that,_ Gaz thought. "So why are you watching it if it's that bad?"

"What else is there?" Zim asked in return.

"What about our new mission. You're hobbies and projects?"

Zim gave out a scoffing laugh. "What mission? It is a joke, a ploy just to keep Zim confined. Why bother playing along?"

Gaz listened to what Zim was saying. Previously, his mission had defined his whole life, his entire existence, all he said and did. He now knew the ploy it was. A fake. Now Zim was without direction, and distrustful of the directives he had been given. Gaz remembered the advice Mrs. Alpha had given her. Help Zim to just put one foot in front of the other. Keep active. Go through the motions. She now saw why, because Zim was just hovering in his life, not moving forward.

Gaz turned toward Zim and took both his hands in her own. "Listen, forget the orders from the Tallest. Yes, it's a ploy." She paused. "Zim, do you think it is important to protect your home? How about the homeworld of your bondmate? Her family, which is important to her for some reason?"

Zim looked into her eyes. "Zim," she continued, "don't do it for the Tallest's whims or to earn anything from them. Make it a personal mission for yourself. For me. For all those who are a part of our lives."

The alien nodded. Gaz could see that he was beginning to understand something. It would still take time, but Gaz knew what helped Zim process things at his best. She pulled him up off the couch. "Come on," she said. "Let's start you off with one of your hobbies."

* * *

They entered the fabrication bay and lights flicked on. A large armored giant stood before them. Gaz stepped forward with Zim. "Let's say you and me finish this thing up."

"Zim does not wish to."

It wasn't exactly the response Gaz was hoping for. "Why not? Zim, this is your pride and joy," she said, looking up at the armored hull of the Scout Walker sitting in the middle of the bay.

"It was a joke on Zim, to string him along. A parody of a reward for securing for the Tallest growth chemicals," he explained in a broken voice.

Gaz turned around. Zim almost looked like he was going to cry. This machine was probably the only _personal_ possession he had, and it was given to him by the Tallest for their usual cruel reasons. A piece of salvage that no one wanted for an unwanted Irken in disguised exile.

Gaz stepped back to Zim and embraced him, her chin resting on his shoulder. "It's okay, Zim," she said. They remained like that for a few minutes. "Zim? Take a long look at your Walker." She felt his head lift up. "Did the Tallest send it to you in this condition?"

"No," Zim answered flatly. "It was just a rusted chassis. It took a long time and effort to restore it."

"That's right. You did this, and now look at it. It's nearly in mint condition. In fact it's probably the envy of any collector of historic vehicles in the Irken civilization." The human girl pulled back a little so she could look at the alien. "Zim, it's true the Tallest's assignment to protect my world, your Governorship and my Ladyship, is all a ruse to keep you here. But that doesn't mean it can't be real. Like that Walker, you can make this posting the envy of every Irken Taller. We have free rein to proceed as we see fit, with no bosses breathing down our necks or demanding their own approval about how to do things or trying to force their own agenda. Because they've already succeeded in their agenda, to get you out of their hair. Our goals are our own."

"The Tallest don't have hair," Zim pointed out.

"It's a figure of speech, Zim."

Zim looked up at the Scout Walker. It was true the armored machine was in excellent condition now, almost fully functional. But he could now start to see what Gaz was talking about.

"Okay, Gaz-partner. We should be able to finish this by late afternoon."

He went over to a nearby locker in the wall and pulled out a pair of Irken coveralls. He handed one to Gaz. "Here, we will be working with the hydraulic systems as we install the weapon attachments. You will not wish to get your dress soiled."

Zim turned to direct Computer's robotic arms within the bay in hauling heavy boxes containing the various assemblies that made up the projectile gun and missile pod to the Walker's feet while Gaz slipped her coveralls over her dress.

As they worked, he realized he was slowly starting to come out of the shock he had experienced the past few days. Perhaps Gaz was right. But Zim knew he would still struggle. He was a natural destroyer, not a protector. He was offensive, not defensive oriented. It would be a challenge to adapt, learn new ways of thinking. Deliberately defending a world was a lot different than trying to wreck one. However, he did have a model to look at in a way.

As Zim helped Gaz piece together the moving parts of the Irken's antique version of a large caliber Gauss Autocannon, he couldn't help but see within himself as he watched Gaz connect and tighten components. He felt what he had for this human girl within himself. Sort of a self-examination. He was Irken, but knew nothing about how his species bonded. Didn't even know basic terms. Just a few basic symptoms that his Tallest had sent him. It was strange that with all his years on Earth and observing the humans, he knew more about human bonding than he did about his own species.

Not that Zim knew much. All of it was fairly revolting, or at least had been. And such knowledge wasn't critical to his mission so he hadn't paid much attention. But that didn't mean he didn't pick up a few things here and there. So as they worked on the Walker, Zim realized something as truly real since all this started, what being in the second stage of bonding really meant to him. He had been too overloaded before. So Zim made a conscious decision rather than just an instinctive or emotional one, and formally accepted it within himself. And so he borrowed a human term. Whatever the Irken version was, he loved a human. Yes, he loved Gaz Membrane very much. The evidence had been undeniable ever since he had called his Tallest. When she had held him while his view of the universe was shattered and he had held her during her nightmare that night. When he discovered he wanted her to be his love pig and not just in an official bonding.

Naturally it wasn't the same as a human's, not as complicated or requiring their rituals. Not exactly all soft and mushy like some humans could be. But it included variations of caring, protectiveness, wanting to see her do well, an instinct to look after her when she had bad dreams, and other things. Some of these would help him understand what his mission meant; to defend his bondmate's homeworld. It would probably always be an alien concept for Zim, but it would help him understand.

"You've told Zim that you have already begun making preparations," Zim inquired.

"Yeah. Mostly having Computer buy provisions you need and set up a place to store them. Just in case we get cut off of Irken supply lines. Computer and I had to buy an old ship to haul them though," Gaz replied as she tightened a connector with some sort of small Irken wrench.

"You bought a ship? A transport?" Zim asked, surprised.

"Yeah," Gaz confirmed. "But not exactly a transport. A salvaged escort carrier. Really old and obsolete, but intact. He's trying to find a shuttle crew for it once it's ready to depart."

"Computer," Zim called, pulling his Pad out of his PAK. "Show me this ship." An outline and schematics appeared on the Pad's display. "You have done well, Gaz-partner. It is a good choice for the task. Being technologically obsolete will not alarm any Irken. You know how we can be about our technology."

She nodded. Zim had been going on and on about his superior Irken tech and how it couldn't belong to anyone else for more years than she wanted to recall.

"The minor modifications to the main gravity distortion manifolds will be complete in about four days. What have you named it?" Zim asked.

"I didn't. This was all spur of the moment stuff. We were both… you know." Gaz looked up from her work and at Zim. He was starting to sound better. Even that light in his eyes seemed a bit brighter now. Not like before, but a noticeable improvement.

Zim just nodded. He did indeed know. Neither of them could ever forget. "Then I would make a suggestion." He tapped at the Pad for a moment and then showed her.

She smiled. Perhaps for the first time since the CWZ convention was concluded. "Thank you, Zim. But you do realize that the class designation you gave it is from Earth, right?"

"It seemed fitting," Zim said. "It isn't an Irken vessel after all. Computer, go ahead and send in the change. Have the yard workers complete it right away."

They returned to their work. "Zim," Gaz called to get his attention once more. "You are sounding better. Do you think you are up to going back to skool tomorrow? I don't think we can miss more days without someone checking in on it, and I'm running out of clean laundry. I'll have to get back home, and I want you to come with me. Computer can baby-sit Gir for one night, can't he?"

* * *

The Irken was loading packages into his delivery ship when the announcement came. "Logistic specialist Bad, report to the front office. Specialist Bad to the front office."

Beed sighed as he closed the back of the ship and trudged his way to the front office. _Why couldn't anyone taller than me remember my name?_ he asked himself for what seemed to be the billionth time in his life. He entered the office and saw his co-worker Lim standing in the room.

"So they called you in too?" she asked.

"Yes. Did you get an explanation?" Beed asked in return.

Lim just shrugged her shoulders. They waited a few minutes before the slightly taller logistical overseer came out.

"Bad! Lame! What have you two been doing? I have instructions to suspend you both immediately! Now I have to find two new replacements in ten minutes. You both are to report to Investigations at once. Now get out of here!" With that the overseer disappeared back into his office to choke down more doughnuts.

Beed and Lim looked at each other as they left the logistics complex and took a ground car to the Investigations building. They didn't say anything for a few minutes. "Did you do anything?" Lim asked.

"I don't think so. You?"

She just shook her head. "You don't think it was about the fight yesterday? Was it?"

Beed didn't respond. It wasn't looking good.

They eventually reached the building and entered. Twenty-eight familiar smallests were sitting along one wall while five Irken guards wearing many bruises, bandages and sporting crutches with arms in slings were on the other side of the room. Beed and Lim took their seats. It was about the fight, and it _definitely_ wasn't looking good.

An Irken Investigator walked into the corridor. "Okay, who is responsible for all this?" Every finger pointed at Beed. "Care to explain what happened?"

Beed took a deep breath. "We were all off-duty. These five guards were slandering not just a Taller, but a Lady of the Empire. We told them we didn't like it. They deliberately provoked us further. So we made them stop."

"We were not insulting a _real_ Taller, puny!" one of the injured guards yelled. "Just a degenerate human!"

The Investigator glared at the guard, then turned to inquire further. He was surprised to see all thirty smallests were standing up and looking very, very angry. Even down right murderous. It didn't take much to imagine lasers shooting out of their eyeballs and incinerating the guards.

"Lady Gaz is an Irken citizen, was appointed co-ruler of her world by the _Tallest_ themselves!" Lim yelled back. She turned to the Investigator "You heard it! They grossly disrespect one who was appointed by the Tallest!"

The Investigator ran his hand over his antennae and blew out a deep breath. _Technically both sides are right, although the guards were pushing it. But what could you expect from meat-heads? Guards are not chosen for their intelligence, but standards seemed to be slipping in their case. However things like this are not supposed to occur. But why are these thirty standing up for this human when nearly the whole population isn't?_

"You guards keep your noise-holes shut from now on, because if I see any one of you ever again, I will report you to your Taller. Now get out of here!"

The guards fled the hallway. One experience with a horde of angry smallests was enough even for them to learn a lesson. Especially when it looked like they could incinerate a few particular guards with a glance at any moment.

"And you all stay put while I consider what to do with you." _This is going to take a lot of work to get to the bottom of this. Work I don't want to do. For some reason they attacked fellow Irkens to defend an alien. PAKs are supposed to prevent that. I'll probably have to send the whole lot to the control brains to sort it out. _And with that the Investigator left to escort the guards out into the street.

At least that's what these smallests were hoping for. A street with fast moving vehicles.

Beed sat back down. They were in trouble. He pulled something out of his PAK. It was a set of travel orders. Lady Gaz had instructed him to return to Earth if he had gotten in trouble.

"You have an escape route, Beed," one of the thirty said. "You met her personally. She showed she was willing to look out for you. What about the rest of us?"

Beed examined the document closely for the first time. It was a very basic set of orders. When they were written, Lady Gaz had not known his name, so that part was clear. So was the ship he was supposed to travel on, and the route to take. In fact, the only thing on it was the order, destination, and the authentication to transfer the expense to Governor Zim and Lady Gaz's shared operations account. It was practically a blank check.

Or another way to look at it was that it was an insanely flexible set of orders to proceed as one saw fit. For a smallest, it would be like giving a human child the keys to a candy store.

"You all need to make a choice before he comes back. Do you want to stay or come with me to Earth?"

* * *

The Investigator came back after several minutes of deliberation. It would take a week of paperwork for each one to send them to the control brains. But in truth he was very lazy. In fact that was why he was successful at his job. He'd just threaten to report offenders to their Tallers, ship them to the control brains or some other fate, and let them go. The perpetrators, thinking they had barely escaped with their lives and not wanting to take another gamble, would shape up. At least until they entered another jurisdiction. Then it wasn't his problem.

But he couldn't do that this time. Not with a potential PAK issue. The Investigator took a special reader out of his own PAK and scanned each one. Their identities and personnel files were loaded for him to examine.

"You, who is your supervisor?" he asked one.

"I was suspended by vehicle repair Overseer Caf."

"And you?"

"Suspended by food service Supervisor Raj."

"You?"

"My supervisor is a paperweight."

"Excuse me?" the Investigator asked.

"Mechanical design Supervisor Vat keeled over six months ago. He was replaced by a paperweight."

Their files seemed to concur. Even the one with the paperweight. "And who are your Tallers?" Several names were listed. He was continuing his scan during the group interview.

All thirty replied in unison. "Lady Gaz."

His scan detected no inconsistency, deception, or even the slightest flaw in basic PAK function. The scan wasn't exhaustive, but it usually did the job he needed it to do. But the names in their files were not the ones they had all said. Yet there was no discrepancy either. "You there, this says your immediate Taller is Dox."

"I was suspended this morning, and Lady Gaz is my senior Taller."

That only made partial sense. For some reason, they were unable to identify this Lady Gaz as alien. But a non-Irken citizen was unheard of too. Leave it to the Tallest to open up a potential PAK issue like this. He seemed to have no choice other than send the whole lot to the control brains. They'd all probably be deactivated, which meant at least six months of paperwork for him. He really didn't want to work this hard. His scanner chirped and he looked at the display. A red numerical code was flashing. The Investigator remained very still.

It wasn't a file or details of facts. Just a code of six flashing numbers. He wasn't a PAK technician, but his job required him to have some understanding. Thousands of little bits were encoded in each PAK. A lot of things that were never used. It simplified uploading time to just activate switches. But this one made him nervous.

"Investigator," Beed spoke up. "We have travel orders. I have been given verbal orders to use them and return if trouble arises from Lady Gaz herself."

"I see," the Investigator said, taking the travel orders. They were vague, but authentic. He returned them. "Please recite what orders those were."

"I was to deliver a package to the _Massive. _Give it to one of the crew to relay it to the Tallest and undock. Return to my job. If I got into trouble, to use the travel orders she gave me to return to her. She said she would find something for me to do," Beed recited.

"And why did she think you would get in trouble?" The Investigator asked.

"Because I'm a smallest, and the package was broken when she gave it to me to deliver. It would be seen as my fault for breaking a package meant for the Tallest. I could lose my job or worse."

A discreet inquiry was sent over the scanner in the Investigator's hand. Indeed there was a delivery registered of one severely broken Black Hole Projector with a personal note. There was no follow-up by the Tallest. So this checked out. He didn't blame anyone for being worried about trouble a broken delivery to the Tallest could have caused.

"So she was looking out for you. Why? You are just a smallest."

"I think that was the point she was making to me. Lady Gaz does not care about how tall anyone is."

That was just about impossible to imagine. "Were all of you there?" He asked.

The rest of the smallests shook their heads. The one called Lim spoke up. "None of us believed him," she said pointing to Beed. "So he showed us his memory of his encounter with Lady Gaz."

"I see. Did Governor Zim and Lady Gaz have any house staff with them? Servants, perhaps?"

"None at all. Lady Gaz herself received the packages I was sent to deliver to her. She also was herself preparing the package I was to deliver to the Tallest. They only have a SIR unit with them."

"Very well. Please wait here while I take all this into consideration." With that the Investigator retreated back into his office.

He sat down and examined the security footage from the bar fight on a wall display. Yes, their stories checked out perfectly with both the video and audio. He saw them push their seats back and stand up to the off-duty guards. They 'requested' that the guards stop speaking in such a way about the human. He had seen such before when some had crossed the line on a sugar high and spoken abusively against an Irken Taller behind their back. All Tallers deserved respect as their height demanded, but some deserved it more than others. This Lady Gaz must have made quite an impression on these smallests.

Then he saw and heard one of the guards reply by spewing out a particularly vulgar string of nasty phrases. Even for a guard, this was excessive. Then he saw it. The change. The guard spewing out verbal garbage was a trigger, and he watched as thirty smallests responded, and defended a Lady of the Empire from a perceived attack.

The Investigator looked at the scanner in his hand and flipped back a few screens. The six red numbers flashing on the display. This was a classified encoding activated within their PAKs and he didn't have the clearance to access it. But that didn't mean he didn't recognize it. Four times in his career he had seen it before, and all were from a Governor or the Tallest's personal units. Those thirty hadn't defended a Lady of the Empire. They had defended _their_ Lady.

Somehow they had taken in watching those memories, the circumstances surrounding a human becoming an Irken citizen, Governor Zim and Lady Gaz having no staff, that Lady Gaz had stated that she had a place for them, and the verbal assault by the guard. The thirty organic brains had fed it all into their PAKs which had processed an unusual combination of data it was never supposed to receive and responded in electronic calculation required for the conditions. A ruling and bonded pair having no staff under a perceived attack? The smallests PAKs corrected that oversight. It was supposed to act as a failsafe measure to ensure an Irken Governor was protected, but it seemed to have failed in this case. The problem was that they had identified with the _human._ The odds of something like this happening must have been a quadrillion to one.

The Investigator pondered for a moment. There were rumors about Earth. That it was, like a black hole, a place where the laws of reason and sanity did not apply. That any Irken going there was touched by it forever. Assuming their life survived Zim. He was almost an urban legend by himself, able to ruin lives and destroy careers nine sectors away. The Investigator had never believed the rumors, but he had never run into anything as crazy as this before either. And the Irken that this case was centered around had only made a brief delivery to the planet.

He looked at the flashing red numbers on his scanner's display again. He should send all thirty smallests to the control brains at once. They would end up deactivated for sure. There was just one problem with that. The attempt may not be survivable.

He was one Irken, a lazy Investigator of minor misbehaviors. However insanely it had come to be, outside his office door were thirty members of a Governors' Own. An entire squadron of Lady Gaz's personal guard. Within their PAKs, a license to serve and defend their recognized Lady by whatever means necessary had been activated. Only she could control them. He was amazed the injured guards of the bar fight had been allowed to live. Not with what they had been saying. And most of the Irken population wasn't being too polite either.

The Investigator made a few urgent calls, one was to a moving company and another to the spaceport. He got up and carefully opened the door. These were _smallests._ None were programmed, trained nor equipped to be soldiers, fighters, guards or any such thing. They were the ones who did the sensitive sort of dirty work that kept their civilization going while everyone else continued with the more important task of trying to conquer the galaxy. Yet they had ripped into five Irken guards like a tsunami without hesitation or suffering injury. There was no way to predict anything. So the Investigator did what any Investigator would have done in his situation. Sweep it under the rug.

"Logistics Specialist Beed?" he called out. The Irken stood up. "I'm going to let you all go. You are all to follow your orders and proceed immediately to the spaceport where you will be provided transportation. Your belongings are being boxed up as we speak and will be loaded for you. I will notify Governor Zim when I am able about the situation. While you are in local Irken space, you are the direct responsibility of Lady Gaz. Your actions reflect on herself. Do you understand?"

Clearly the answer was no, but that was also obviously the wrong answer.

As the thirty smallests filed out of the building, the Investigator began the process of finding out how to contact the urban legend known as Zim. Hopefully Irk was far enough away to remain safe.

After some time, the call connected on his wall monitor, and a rather unpleasant face covered in smudges with purple hair appeared. She was not Irken, and the background behind her showed some sort of armored upper limb inside an Irken base. "What do you want? Have another poke at Zim? I don't think so. You people have done enough. I've already warned your Tallest about any attempt, so if you think-"

The Investigator interrupted, but his thoughts were running first. This had to be Lady Gaz, and she was not happy, protective and clearly adversarial. She had just stated that she had warned the _Tallest_ about actions concerning Zim. He couldn't help but think about that reference he had looked up about the package Beed had delivered. A broken black hole projector. She had not just _threatened_ but _demonstrated_ that she could have destroyed the_ Massive_ with the Tallest aboard at any time she chose without batting an eye, yet showed concern over a smallest Irken. That was impressive indeed. It seemed this human needed a personal guard, not to protect her, but to protect the rest of the universe _from_ her.

"Lady Gaz I presume? I'm just an Investigator here on Irk. There has been some trouble here with someone you met recently. A certain Specialist Beed? He delivered a package for you. I wish to speak to Governor Zim. It concerns an issue that needs to be discussed."

"Zim is here with me, but if it concerns my package you can discuss the matter with me," the girl on the screen growled.

"This does not concern any package. The deliverer and a few dozen of his associates severely injured several off-duty guards who were… saying very unpleasant things about you. I was put in charge of the case. No charges will be filed, but there has been a development with their PAKs. Are you sure I can't speak to Governor Zim?"

"He can hear you, but he's just now starting to pull out of what you people did to him. So you can deal with me."

He had never met a bondmate before. It was unnerving. The Investigator was starting to get the uneasy feeling that this Lady Gaz could easily have been one of a Governor's Own herself. "Yes, I see. Well, several smallests have had a section of code activated in their PAKs. It is making them rather easily provoked when they perceive an attack against you, Lady Gaz."

"Against _me?_ Not against Zim? But I'm human," the girl stammered.

"Yes, their PAKs are asserting themselves as a Governor's Own. But they identify with you, Lady Gaz."

Off the screen came a sudden burst of laughter, followed by a green body falling from up high, bouncing off of the large metal arm, and falling past the bottom of the screen with a crash and sounds of scattering containers. The laughter continued.

"What's a Governor's Own?" Lady Gaz asked. "And how many are affected?"

"They are your own personal guard, Lady Gaz. Made up of thirty Irken smallests with a strong fidelity toward you," the Investigator informed her. "We are sending them away before others are affected as well."

The laughter in the background turned into a howl with sporadic intakes of uncontrolled breath.

"Shut up, Zim! This is NOT funny!" Lady Gaz threw over her shoulder. The laughter did not stop. "When are they departing?" she asked.

"They should be leaving the spaceport as soon we can get them out of here. Have a good day." And with that the Investigator signed off. The problem was in someone else's lap now. Case closed.

* * *

Beed walked with Lim and the other smallests across the spaceport tarmac. As they had entered the expanse, they had been met with a military guide who had saluted them, despite their shortness, and guided them to this area. Luggage carts were being loaded onto the ships here.

They had been expecting some of the slowest and most rundown shuttles to fly them up to some low priority transport in orbit. Not several dozen Spittle Runners. Irken space superiority craft that bore no markings. They had replaced the Voot Cruiser over a century ago, and themselves had been replaced by the latest generation of small single-pilot combat ships. The Spittle Runners were now being phased out, but still were considered frontline units.

"Excuse me," Lim spoke up to the guide. "Are we in the right place?"

The guide shot at her a look that stated such a question was dumb to think up, let alone ask. "This area is reserved for detached special units. Your squadron has been assigned to these ships. You will not discuss anything with anyone outside your group. Once loaded, you will depart and carry out your travel orders. Is that clear?" The guide didn't wait, but indicated which ship had been loaded with who's belongings. Then he walked off.

"We are in so much trouble," one of them said.

"What is going on?" another asked.

"I don't know," Beed admitted. "But it looks like they want us out of here really bad. Let's not disappoint them."

* * *

Thirty unmarked Spittle Runners were next in line for the Hypergate. It was essentially a subspace slingshot orbiting Irk. A recent invention, it could fling individual spacecraft not equipped with a wormhole drive to their destination within minutes. It was of course a one way trip as it was the only Hypergate in existence.

"Reject Squadron, you will proceed to the initial beacon. Transmit your travel orders and deposit fifty thousand monies for a non-military squadron jump. I haven't got all day." The controller instructed over the squadron's communication network.

Blood drained from Beed's face. _Fifty thousand monies?_ he thought. A smallest courier pilot like himself earned only four monies per year, and that was a good wage for a smallest. _Lady Gaz will skin me alive._ But he didn't know what else to do. Navigation coordinates to allow an Irken ship to set a course for Earth was not exactly easy to find on Irk, and remembering galactic coordinates was impossible even with a PAK. Neither were they provided with a way to contact the planet. Why would a bunch of undesirable smallests suspended from their jobs ever need to know such things? But then they shouldn't have been given Spittle Runners either. Nothing was making sense anymore.

So Beed fed his travel orders into a slot in his instrument panel and waited. He did not have to wait long.

"Reject Squadron," the controller's voice came over the speakers again. "The funds transfer you have requested has been denied." Beed's squeedlyspooch felt like it had dropped into his feet. It had been too good to be true. "You will stand by. You will be contacted shortly."

If they were fortunate, he'd just be dumped onto the planet Dirt or Rock. If not, they could all be dumped onto the planet of Broken Glass. Several minutes went by. His squadron network was pinging with requests from the others as they too had been listening in. He didn't answer them. More minutes went by. Then the controller came back on the line.

"Uh, um, my apologies. We did not realize you were a special unit. Your Taller has only just now been notified of the situation and, um, expressly pointed out how, uh, displeased she is that we have insulted her by giving your unit an, um, incorrect designation. She has corrected this, and your squadron is now designated as the Black Sheep. Please follow course two-nine-eight mark zero-zero-four to the third moon. Please do not open fire on my poor control pod. I didn't mean disrespect, honest. Your Taller is waiting with instructions."

Beed turned his Spittle Runner into the correct heading and led the group away from the Hypergate on the new course. An image of Lady Gaz came up on a side display. Her purple hair was a bit of a mess, and there were all manner of smudges on her face.

"Lady Gaz!" Beed exclaimed. "What has happed to you? Are you hurt?"

"What? No, Zim and I have been working on some equipment. We're just dirty. How are you doing? I guess you found yourself some trouble."

"We don't understand what is happening. Nothing makes sense right now." _A Taller _working?_ Getting _dirty? _The whole universe has turned upside down._ "If we had known the Hypergate cost was so outrageous we wouldn't have tried. Honest!" Beed hoped to be stranded on Rock rather than on Broken Glass.

"Beed, calm down. We would have paid the fee. It would have hurt, but we would have paid it. I didn't mean to your impact your lives so severely. It wasn't supposed to happen, but a lot of unintended consequences are manifesting themselves. Okay? None of you did anything wrong. Beed, are all of you listening right now?"

Beed nodded. The display phased into static and cleared as a scrambler algorithm activated and the Spittle Runners found the decryption process that had been implanted within the signal at the beginning of the transmission.

"Okay, guys. Listen carefully. I have been told that there is a PAK issue. Your PAKs are fine, they are not defective. Understand? But they have been affected, amplifying what you feel about defending me from attack, even from other Irkens. And I'm an alien species. It's not supposed to happen. So rather than deal with it, you all have been transferred to me as my personal guard," the image of Lady Gaz informed them.

Beed sat still. They had been so close to a visit to the control brains. He shivered. But on the other hand, talk about a promotion! What Invaders were to Irken soldiers was what a Governor's Own unit was to Irken security. And they were just smallests! The image before him continued speaking.

"Zim informs me that your PAKs identify with me now, but understand that Zim is included in that. It applies to both of us as bondmates. Understood?"

Beed only nodded.

Lady Gaz continued once more. "Now you are on a course to a ship I've acquired. It is not Irken, so you will think it's obsolete and may be uncomfortable. We haven't found a crew to bring it here yet, so you will have to fill in. Computer will send you the needed codes for docking and other functions. Beed, this is a logistical mission, hauling supplies we need. So can you help set things up over there? Computer will also send specifications, delivery times, whatever you need. You all will have to work together without a Taller telling you how to do your job or what solution to problems you should use. You're there, I'm not. So I'm depending on you all to see to this. Once you are ready, you may take the ship through the Hypergate if it is feasible, at your discretion. Just inform us when you are ready."

"One more thing," she added. "If Irk wants whatever ships you are flying in now returned, let them be collected. I know Irkens are touchy about letting their technology fall into the hands of other species, and I am obviously not Irken. Don't give anyone a hard time about it, but you are to keep your own belongings. Those are off limits, and they have no right to confiscate them. For the time being you all are going to have to stand taller than you actually are. Understood?"

Beed nodded again. Lady Gaz signed off.

* * *

"Computer, update the projections of needed supplies. Is it affordable?"

"Only the quantities for biological requirements have been impacted. These are low cost basic items. Very few mechanical or technical components are necessary to augment final inventory. This is much more affordable than the fifty thousand monies Hypergate fee would have been."

"Computer, if things keep going like this we're going to get quarantined. And we haven't even considered developing any type of system defense yet. Please look into how to develop our available resources with these things in mind," Gaz asked of the computer.

"Yes, Mistress. This will take quite some time. A few days perhaps."

Gaz had to take a seat on an empty box. "Zim," she called.

The alien took a seat next to her. Gaz turned to him. "Zim, I just was trying to be nice and show concern to a delivery guy. To try not be a doomer. Okay, maybe annoy some higher ups on Irk a little. But I ended up ruining thirty lives. They fared worse than if I had been deliberately dooming one person. I almost got thirty of them deactivated because I was trying to be _nice._ I feel like I am barely able to help _you_ rebuild. What am I going to do with _thirty?_"

Zim pulled Gaz close. She was struggling at times too. Zim could see that she was trying. But Gaz really was starting to blossom since their world had been turned upside down.

"Gaz-blossom, you did not destroy anything. You are helping Zim's life to be better than it could ever have been. All these Irkens were in dead-end jobs with no hope for advancement in society. To be stepped on always. They do not know it yet, but now they have something. It will be strange, but you have given them a mission to pursue. You have shown that you care for your people, and they _are _your people now. However it happened, even though you are human they will follow you not because you are taller than them, but because you are worthy of it. You gave them what you needed them to accomplish, and released them to do so without second guessing. You made a way for them when they needed it. You stepped up for them when they were being stepped on. They will do the same for you."

The alien continued. "Zim is not cut out to be a ruler. He knows this now. He is a destroyer, a combatant. You, however, have always shown that you can be a ruler. In a way you have ruled our skool for many years. All know better than to displease you, yet also to leave you alone. But now you are showing what kind of ruler you one day can become."

"I don't want to rule my planet," Gaz replied in a small voice.

"Zim has news for you, Gaz-blossom. We've already been made rulers by the Tallest. But that doesn't mean we are hands-on or involved like you are imagining. Just the opposite in fact. We are not supposed to interfere. To be visible. You've just been knocked off balance learning that you have your own personal guard. You have not expected this responsibility, having other's lives in your hands, but you are handling it superbly."

Gaz tucked her head into Zim's neck and wrapped an arm around him. "I guess we both have a lot to learn. Thanks, Zim."

They remained like that for awhile. Gaz pulled her head away to look at Zim. "Gaz-_blossom?" _she inquired.

"Yes," was Zim's reply.

Gaz tucked her head back into Zim's comforting embrace. "I think I can live with blossom." The two sat there for several more minutes before getting back to work.

* * *

Ten minutes later the squadron of slightly outdated Spittle Runners surrounded a ship orbiting the specified moon inside a web of shipyard gantries. The nearby small craft were dwarfed by the larger vessel.

"Beed," Lim called over the communications net, "do you _see_ this?"

Indeed he did. Most governors had personal ships. Fancy shuttles, military yachts, and other ships of that sort. Granted, the vessel was not even close to measuring up to Irken standards, looking very worn and obsolete. But this vessel was much larger than what any other Governor had, over one thousand feet long. Four hundred feet at it's widest near the stern where the engines were located, and three hundred near the front. It's upper and lower armored hull were flat across most of the surface until they angled down sharply at the edges, down to where thick hatches that housed and launched individual small craft, such as Spittle Runners and Voot Cruisers, were housed along the sides.

A superstructure housing control compartments and other ship's stations rose above and below the hull on one side with two sets of three hardened turrets mounting some light energy emitters before and aft of the upper and lower control island. Two dozen point defense turrets were dotted along the angled edges of the hull along with sensor blisters and communications arrays. Straight down the center of the vessel was a hollow shaft for landings or shuttle launches, each end open to space at the moment.

It was a warship. An aging Escort Carrier to be precise.

As a transport, it had no need of an escort. Centuries ago, ships such as these with their space superiority craft had once been designed to _be_ the biggest, most dangerous escorts around, protecting large scale convoys.

Along each side was the customary triangular Irken symbol, but this too was different. Black, the center was a hollow circle, taken up by a strangely shaped representation of a skull. After that was human writing. His PAK translated the glyphs for him. _CVE-1 Doomwind._

Someone with a better translation unit than he did made a bit of a dark humored joke at the appearance. "Does anyone know what CVE stands for? Other than combustible, vulnerable, and expendable I hope?"

Beed and the others didn't comment. To Irken eyes it didn't look like much, but something about those lines did make it look menacing. And something this size could be stuffed with a lot of cargo. Lots and lots of cargo. The question in his mind was _How can thirty Irkens fly this thing?_ They might have to hire some extra hands. But if the size of this ship was any indication, Lady Gaz wasn't kidding when she said she had a logistics mission for them.

Beed entered the code that had been transmitted to him, and armored hatches opened along one side of the carrier. "Okay, lets dock and unload our belongings. Someone find where the crew quarters are so we can stow our stuff."

He closed the communications channel and began humming as he backed his ship into one of the sixty bays strung along the sides of the _Doomwind._ Yesterday he was delivering packages to ungrateful Tallers and being called Bad all the time. Today he was one of a Governor's Own, overseeing his Lady's massive logistics operation and entrusted with her warship. If they managed to keep the Spittle Runners, the carrier even had an small offensive punch to throw around.

Each of those smallests felt like they were ten feet tall.

* * *

Wednesday morning Gaz and Zim wearing his disguise, pulled into the parking lot in her Jeep. The back was full of dirty clothes and other things Gaz had over at Zim's. On top of the pile was a few things Zim would need. A few snacks, a bar of cleansing chalk and his hammock.

They stepped out of the vehicle. Zim looked at Gaz, noting the bags under her eyes. She had woken up early, nearly five in the morning, so Zim could use the hammock to get his two hours of PAK maintenance before today. Afterward, he had found she had fallen back asleep sitting on the couch in the living room.

Both felt they could use another day or two to settle first. Or a month. But life wouldn't wait for them. She nodded and pulled her necklace under her customary dress while Zim pulled his own under his shirt. One step at a time. They pulled their books out of the Jeep and headed into the skool just as the first bell rang. Both had a few days of makeup work awaiting for them as well as today's assignments.

* * *

Dib sat at his customary spot in the cafeteria alone. Earlier he had watched Zim carefully in the classes they still shared. He was definitely different. Not grandiose, exaggerated, or loud. In fact he seemed to be the opposite of all those things. Even withdrawn. Very strange for Zim.

He slowly chewed his Almost Pizza, but brightened up when he saw his sister for the first time since that Sunday night. In fact he had hardly seen Gaz at all for over two weeks. The truth was he had missed her, and had worried about her condition. Zim was walking next to her. They hadn't gotten anything to eat. She was carrying several textbooks in her arms and Zim was loaded down with make up assignments he had missed during their absence.

The two sat down at Dib's otherwise empty table. But Gaz didn't take her customary seat next to her brother. She had sat down across from him sitting next to Zim. Both looked nervous.

"Hey, Dib. It's been awhile." It wasn't much of a greeting, but at least Gaz was trying a little. She was obviously tired.

"It's good to see you in one piece still. You've looked better though," was Dib's comment.

"Dib, can we not do this right now?" Gaz asked. "It's been a tough time for both of us. I want to talk to my big brother, not the crusader. But I need you to be an investigator too. This is going to be difficult to talk about with you. It's confidential, Dib. A family matter."

Whenever Gaz trotted out the word family like this, she always meant business and was always serious. Dib put his Almost Pizza aside and gave his sister his full attention as best he could. Zim was sitting right in front of him after all.

Gaz took a few deep breaths. "On the last night of the convention, I had what I thought was a slave collar attach itself to me." She continued quickly before Dib could respond. "It wasn't though. On the way back, I freaked and slapped the other one on Zim to force him to remove them." Gaz nodded to Zim.

Together they pulled out their matching necklaces from under their clothes and let them rest around their necks in the open. "Gir had us sign a document and we were too busy shouting at each other to pay attention."

Gaz looked at her fidgeting hands. "Dib, please don't freak out, okay? This is really hard."

Dib was getting anxious. He kept looking back and forth between the two necklaces. He just nodded for Gaz to continue.

"Here are some things for you to examine for your benefit, and it's all confidential. If you try to expose Zim you also expose me, your sister. And this has a lot of personal stuff in it. I've got a scrapbook here. Recordings of what happened, our transmission to the Tallest, and a full record of the day after at Zim's base. I need you to be an investigator, not a crusader, and look at these impartially. Please?"

Dib took the record chips and scrapbook from his sister. For Dib, it was an intelligence bonanza like he had never been able to achieve. And yet Zim, sitting across the table from him, just sat there.

Gaz fingered her necklace. "These can't be removed, Dib. Ever. They're from Judgementia and they are real zealous about this sort of thing. Irkens can be too. The Tallest made me a citizen of their Empire when we tried to get this straightened out."

Dib spoke up. "Gaz, I don't understand. What are those things? What's going on?"

Gaz and Zim looked at each other. Gaz took another deep breath. "It's not entirely what it looks like. At least not yet. Zim and I, well, uh, um…" She stopped talking and pulled what appeared to be an official document sandwiched between two thin sheets of transparent yet stiff material. She hesitantly slid it over so Dib could see.

It was a marriage license from the state of Nevada between Zim and Gaz Membrane.

"We're officially recognized in three different star systems," Gaz quietly told her brother.

Dib did nothing but stare at the document for over two minutes until Gaz pulled it back and it disappeared into a folder. Then he looked at Zim.

"ZIM, YOU ^%&# MARRIED MY SISTER?!" Dib shrieked at the top of his lungs. In the middle of an overcrowded hi-skool cafeteria.

There was a period of unnatural silence. Not even the crickets laying siege against the cockroaches' fortress of meatloaf in the corner made a sound or moved a muscle.

Then the murmuring began. Gaz, terribly embarrassed, just buried her face in her arms on the table as the fragmented but clear mumbling reached her ears.

"Married? The freak and the psycho?"

"I didn't even know they were an item."

"I can't even _imagine _them being an item."

"Well, the loser has been yelling at the freak to stay away from her for years. No wonder."

"I've seen them slipping notes in each other's lockers. I always thought they were exchanging death threats, but now-"

"I overheard them talking about a trip to Vegas last week."

"They must have eloped over the weekend."

"Why? Nobody gets married while still in hi-skool. Not even the Barbie twins are that dumb."

"You don't suppose-"

"Could she?"

"What other reason could there be? She'd graduate next year anyway, so why couldn't they wait?"

"You mean her and that freak-"

"You mean she's-"

"They're-"

"She's having a-"

Dib was hearing all this too, and was imagining a hundred Zims bursting out of Gaz and hijacking the skool at any moment.

Zim was glaring at Dib very intently. Gaz poked her eyes out from her arms. "Zim? Please go get me a gallon of paste from the janitor's closet and some heavy duty staplers from the office."

Zim stood up and left. He didn't catch on to the worst half of what was being said, but it didn't really matter. He would get two jugs of paste.

Gaz lifted her head up and stared at her brother. "Dib, you have no idea how much a fool you have just made me. Zim and I have barely been able to keep our head above water without falling apart. I'm legally married to my brother's worst enemy. I didn't know if he'd even survive the first night when he collapsed. I've had to manage things for Zim for the past few days. I've been going all out until I have trouble too, and Zim has to pull me back on my feet while I'm trying to help him onto his. I've had to arrange for provisions for him, facilities, transport. I've got thirty Irkens out there who somehow see me as their rightful Taller and assigned as my personal guard. I've already had to call and pull them out of trouble back on Irk and need to figure out what I'm going to do with them. And now thanks to YOU, three-quarters of the student body mistakenly believe I'm _pregnant!"_

She reached over, grabbed Dib and hauled him bodily across the table. Gaz growled in his face. "_We did not need this, DIB!_ You so owe me until the sun implodes! Do you comprehend? We didn't go looking for this, but he's part of our family now. You never again get to be less than civil toward Zim because he's not an Invader anymore. He's your brother. You have until this afternoon to get used to it because I'm bringing Zim home for tonight."

She roughly let go of her brother. "I don't want to leave him alone until I _know _he's recovered enough."

Gaz turned her head and saw Zim reenter the cafeteria with two gallons of paste and several industrial staplers. "Now I have some morons to see too." She pointed at the recording chips and scrapbook in her brother's hands. "We want those back. If anything happens to them, you and me are history. If Zim gets so much as a paper cut, you are fertilizer."

Zim came up and stood behind Gaz. She loudly scraped her chair back and it tipped over as she stood up. This did not go unnoticed as she unscrewed the caps off of the jugs of paste and took a set of staplers.

"RUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! GAZ IS HAVING A MOOD SWING!"

Dib held on tight to the things she had lent him as he watched Zim and Gaz begin to wallpaper the cafeteria with screaming students. One managed to escape his stapled clothing, but the rest chose not too when he was rounded up and plastered to the ceiling with a cocoon of glue. It would take firefighters and the jaws of life to cut him loose and the janitor would later take three days to scrape the others off the walls with a spatula. He did get paid by the hour. That day would later be known as Black Wednesday.

Dib had watched the two operate as he hunkered in his corner. He saw Zim and Gaz work together. Whatever they were, they functioned as partners in every sense of the word.

* * *

The last bell rang and Dib left the building and crossed the parking lot. He looked around before crossing a driveway for the buses, and saw Zim and Gaz sitting in her Jeep. She had her head buried in Zim's shoulder and was crying her eyes out as he tried to offer comfort. For the first time Dib didn't feel protective, insulted, threatened, or any of the usual things. He felt shame.

Gaz had willingly come to him with something difficult to talk to her brother about and he had grossly betrayed her confidence in the worst possible way. Dib had destroyed her reputation in a single outburst. Gaz's reputation was perhaps her most valuable possession and it was ruined now. There was no way to fix this. No way to repair the damage. No way to make it right again. Everyone would believe the rumors for months, probably the rest of the school year and beyond. So Dib did the only thing he could do. He got in his own car and drove home, thinking about how much he did indeed owed his sister until the sun imploded.

* * *

Gaz opened the front door to the Membrane house and picked up her suitcases. "Dib? We're home."

Dib was in the living room doing his homework. "Hey, Gaz. Let me help you with your stuff."

"It's okay, we've got it," Gaz said as she and Zim walked into the door.

Zim only had a change of clothes, a few snacks, the cleansing chalk and his hammock. It all was slung under one arm. The rest of his load was Gaz's stuff.

Dib watched as Zim entered the premises, but said nothing. He was uncomfortable with this, but Zim was the one behaving, not himself. And Gaz had made it clear that Dib was to be civil. Of course that didn't mean Dib hadn't already set the security systems for his room and the basement lab on maximum.

"Zim, we can get you set up in my room. Your hammock can hang inside the closet once we pull my clothes out of it," Gaz suggested.

"Uh, Gaz?" Dib spoke up. "I don't think-"

"Zim," she interrupted her brother. "could you excuse us for a minute? Go on upstairs and get set up. First door on the right."

Once Zim was out of sight upstairs, Gaz turned toward her brother. "Dib, I just had to endure a very unpleasant biology lecture and what my 'options' were from the school nurse this afternoon, and fifty classmates asking to feel my belly since then. So I am really not in the mood for your crap right now."

Dib put up his hands. "Gaz, I'm just saying Zim can stay down here in the living room tonight. I just don't think it's appropriate for him to stay in your room-"

Gaz exploded in anger. "Appropriate? After what you just did?" she screamed. "Who do you think you are, Dib? Who are YOU to tell me that it isn't acceptable for _my husband _to set up his hammock in my room, when I have every right to share with him _my bed!"_

She continued to glare at her brother who was gaping at her. Then her own eyes grew wide and she raised her hand to cover her mouth as she realized what she just said.

"Gaz, it's okay." Dib was saying. "I know you didn't mean it."

"Dib, you don't understand," Gaz said back to him, stunned. "I did. I meant every word."

There was a very long and uncomfortable pause. Gaz spoke first. "Dib, you can't imagine how difficult this has been for us. We didn't ask for this, we're not ready for it, and we have no idea what we're doing. Not really. There is no precedence for the situation we've found ourselves in. We're both just trying to find our way through this. Dib, just let us be, okay? Zim has been nothing but decent toward me. We've both got a ton of things to do tonight just to catch up, and I'm tired. Please look carefully at what we've given you, okay? You'll see for yourself."

Gaz turned to go upstairs and stopped. She spoke over her shoulder to her brother in a sad voice. "Dib? You believed it for a moment too, didn't you? What they were saying about me?" she asked.

Dib nodded his head and watched his sister head upstairs and into her room. Soon dirty laundry began to be tossed through her open door into the hallway. He collected is homework, the scrapbook and recording chips and headed into the garage. He tried not to think of how often Gaz had used the word 'we' before she went up to her room. But it was more pleasant than feeling how much he had betrayed his own sister rather than stick up for her reputation.

* * *

Gaz woke up in the middle of the night, her throat parched. She pulled off her covers and hauled herself out of bed.

"Gaz-blossom?" came from her open closet where Zim was lying in his hammock. "Are you all right? You should not be awake yet."

"Hey, Zim. I'm okay, just thirsty. How are you holding up?" she asked, yawning as she turned on a nearby lamp.

"It is too quiet here. But Zim occupies himself," came the response.

"Thinking? Letting your mind wander?" she guessed.

"Zim's brain is not detachable. It does not separate to roam like some Earth pet," Zim informed her.

Gaz actually giggled. It had been awhile since she found something humorous like that. She went over to Zim's hammock and took his hand in hers. "So if it's too quiet, how have you been occupying yourself just lying there?"

"Zim has been watching his love-pig sleep. It has been a pleasing experience."

If Zim had said that two weeks ago, it would have been creepy and there would have been threats and possible minor injuries. Of course if anyone _else_ had said that at _any _time, a trip to the emergency room could have been necessary. But now she found it sweet. Besides, Zim had earlier heard what Gaz had called him when she screamed at her brother. No one had said anything further, but there was no use resisting the term any more. Gaz squeezed Zim's hand and smiled.

"Well, your love pig needs to go downstairs for a glass of water. Can I get you anything?" she asked.

"I supposed the Dib-stink's head on a primitive pike is out of the question?"

Gaz sat down on the hammock next to Zim. "Yes. As much as I'd like to, he's still my brother. And yours. You two are going to have to stop feuding. That doesn't mean you don't hate each other. Just be civil about it, okay? I still don't want to get stuck as a referee between you two."

* * *

Gaz headed back toward the stairs after quenching her thirst in the kitchen. She noticed a light under the door leading into the garage. Her brother had yet to go to bed. She opened the door and walked inside.

Tak's ship still filled the garage as it had done all these years. It had only been taken out a few times. Dib used it as more of a command center for his paranormal stuff. The cockpit was open and Dib was still seated inside the single-pilot vehicle. He noticed as his sister walked around the hull to view inside the cockpit.

"Hi, Gaz. Shouldn't you be asleep?" Dib asked.

"I was about to ask you the same thing," Gaz replied.

"Yeah, there is a lot of material here to cover, even with the ship's computer scanning and speeding through the areas without movement or sound."

"Listen, Dib. Some of that may be-" she started to say.

"Difficult for me to see? Make me want to rush upstairs and tear up Zim into tiny pieces? Yeah. Had that moment already," Dib said as he looked at the ship's main display. "Like when you crawled into his hammock in your Irken disguise. But I owe you, and you asked me to examine all this like the investigator that I'm supposed to be. That, and you deserved far better than what you've gotten today. It was difficult, but I saw that you were just looking out for him."

"Look, Dib. I know you don't get it. You and Zim have been blood enemies for most of your life," Gaz told her brother.

Dib went on like he hadn't heard her. "I was watching the video waiting for him to make his move, to show it was all a trick, to get up and start performing experiments on you. But he didn't. He didn't move. Then you had that nightmare."

Dib looked up at his sister as she suppressed a shudder at the brief remembrance of the dream where she had found Zim's body. He continued speaking. "I've never heard you utter an inhuman sound like that before, let alone shatter to pieces. But, Gaz, Zim was _scared._ I'm the world's expert on Invader Zim, and I can tell you for a fact that he's never been scared. Not for a single moment in any of our encounters. Nervous, worried, alarmed, anxious, but never scared. Not like this. The Zim I knew would have only exploited the moment. I couldn't believe my eyes, Gaz. I examined that section nine times. Closely. He was utterly afraid, but for _you, _Gaz. Not of you. For you. He _needed_ to help you for your sake."

Gaz climbed into the cockpit and sat on the arm of the pilot's seat Dib was in. The display in the control panel before them was showing a flawless night-vision view of Zim's auxiliary lab as time sped by. Two figures in a hammock were clearly evident. Dib looked up at Gaz's expression.

"Gaz, I can tell these are raw and unedited, but you've never even _seen_ these, have you?" Dib asked. He watched her shake her head.

She spoke up. "Dib, you can't use this. You can't try to expose Zim. If you did, they'd not just take him away for who-knows-what. They'd take me too. And with everyone thinking I'm… I'm-"

"Don't worry about it, Gaz. I won't," Dib promised her. He suppressed his own shudder at what would happen to his sister. "Gaz, you gave these to me without even checking to see what was on them first. You even got Zim to trust your judgement enough to allow me to examine this. That I would keep it confidential. Even after I blew it today, he didn't demand them back."

They didn't say anything for a few minutes. "Look, Dib. I know you think Irkens are evil and all, but Zim never was a prime example of his species. Especially when he thought he was an Invader. But the past two weeks he's grown more than he did in all the previous years on our planet."

"I know. I saw bits of that in the transmission with the Tallest, the parking lot, and what I'm reviewing now." Dib paused. "I guess you were correct when you said I didn't know the person behind the Invader. No, you were spot on there. But for a long time you have to admit that there wasn't a lot more to Zim than the Invader, right?"

Gaz nodded. Dib looked back at the display before he continued. "As your brother I don't want it to be true, don't want to admit the possibility even exists, but I'm an investigator too. It's what I do. What I try to be. Even when I want it to be otherwise, I can't reject what the evidence is saying."

Dib went on. "But you were wrong too, Gaz. I remember what you told me last Sunday, about me tossing Irk into a black hole. I'm repulsed by what they do, but I don't personally hate all of them like you think. My fight with Zim has been personal, which has influenced my objectivity, and I admit I can be a bit obsessed like dad at times. But I don't hate them all just because their alien."

Dib didn't say anything for a minute. He wanted to change the subject from himself, but there were no safe topics to go to. "In the video, I heard what you told Zim. You're not just married, are you? I mean it's more than a just legal thing. I read the scrapbook too."

Gaz nodded her head. "I really do care for him. A lot even. I have no desire to back out of this. You think I'm sick for getting involved with an alien, just like almost everyone else. Don't you? Zim's whole planet is joking about us."

Dib shook his head. "No. I don't. I don't like it because I'm your brother and I have major issues with Zim. But it's not like that. I'm _into_ the paranormal and weird, remember? Besides, I keep thinking what I would be going through in your place if I found myself hitched with an Irken." The speed of the video slowed down to normal and showed the picture of a sleeping Gaz beginning to fidget. Next to her was Zim, tightening his grip reassuringly around the girl. His voice was low and soft.

"Gaz-partner. Zim is here. He is not gone. He is alive, right next to you. He is hurt, but still here. He is not leaving, not going anywhere. Have good dreams, Gaz-partner. There is no need to search anymore. Zim is still here," the alien cooed into the sleeping Gaz's ear.

Dib pointed at the display. "You haven't seen this part, have you? That's the third time he's done that. And only when you start having another nightmare. It's not him trying to put subliminal commands in your mind. And it's more than just an act of concern. That alien actually feels for you. I thought it was impossible for him to feel anything but contempt for any non-Irken."

The video sped back up, and the two just sat there in silence for a little while.

Then Dib started laughing. Laughing very hard. "It just occurred to me. All these years, all the plans, schemes, the efforts. The fights, injuries and battles. The pain and anxiety almost every single day. And all I really needed to do to protect Earth from Irken conquest was play matchmaker between you and Zim!"

Gaz chuckled too. "Look on the bright side. If you had at the time, we _both_ would have been putting you in traction permanently."

She didn't speak for a few more moments. "You know, Dib? I always thought it was stupid, how you never named this ship. I mean it's always been 'Tak's ship.' But I get it now. If something happed to Zim his base would be mine, but to me it will always be 'Zim's base.' I couldn't accept possession of it. Not really."

Dib didn't say anything. "You liked her. You were practically friends. I remember how you two would talk about Zim being such an idiot and the latest way she had doomed him. You told me how she listened to you blather on about your paranormal stuff and didn't hold it against you. I mean, she was here almost a month."

"You remember that?"

"Dib, you were never exactly a popular guy. It stood out. Besides, we're sitting in her ship talking and hinting about relationship stuff with Irkens. It tends to bring back some memories."

Dib shrugged his shoulders. "Well, it was a ruse anyway. Plus she would have been trying to take over the planet if she hadn't left."

Gaz looked at her brother. "You sure about that? It all being a ruse, I mean. She wasn't really into the whole scam thing. Other than being in disguise and not divulging the Invader stuff, she was straight with you. Never really went out of her way hurt anybody until the machine activated. Heck, the only one who really suffered was Zim, and you _loved_ that! She even employed a human in that giant hotdog stand instead of putting in an Irken robot. "

She kept going. "As for the 'taking over the world thing,' if you want to think about it, the Tallest were doing the same thing to her as they did to Zim. They told her she could take over a fake 'mission' that was really an exile if she could get rid of Zim. She wasn't an Invader, just like Zim. It wasn't a real Irken effort to seize our planet. It was a disguised assassination attempt on Zim."

Dib shook his head. "Gaz, can we not-"

She interrupted. "You never talked bad about her afterward. Never held anything against her, unlike with Zim. A few minutes ago when you said you didn't hate all Irkens. You meant her, didn't you? You still like her. A part of you still sees her as an almost friend."

"Look, Gaz. What's the point? She's either running around conquering the galaxy or she's still floating in solar orbit dead in an escape pod," Dib said darkly.

"Dib?" Gaz asked softly. "I know every Thursday you sit up on the roof with your little satellite dish and headphones. Is that what you do? Search for her escape beacon?"

"No. I search for Irken transmissions that could indicate a possible invasion, and other phenomena that could be out there," he informed her. "But I never picked up anything from her pod."

Just because he wasn't searching didn't mean he hadn't been listening for it. Gaz impulsively pushed some buttons on the communications panel. Dib tried to interrupt her. "Gaz, what are you-"

"Computer, you there?" she asked.

"Yes, Mistress. Do you need anything?"

"Can you just locate Tak for me, please? She was sent here several years ago to take out Zim. Did someone pick up her escape pod?"

"It will take a minute. Please stand by, Mistress."

"Gaz, what are you doing?" Dib inquired. Gaz didn't answer the rhetorical question. "You're doing this for me, even after I wrecked your reputation today? You, you're showing _empathy?"_

Gaz looked down. "I know, I should have destroyed you. I don't know what's happening to me, Dib. It's like Zim got in my heart, and now I can't stop. I feel like I'm changing so _fast._ I've never been like this before. What's happening to me, Dib? Why do I care?"

"It's not true, Gaz. You've been this way before. You just don't remember it. You were too young," Dib stated.

Gaz just looked at him with an odd expression. Dib elaborated. "Gaz, caring is how you _used_ to be. Before Mom left. Before Dad got busy. You were only about four so you don't remember. You're not changing as such. You're just opening up to people again. Gaz, this is you coming back to life."

Gaz didn't know what to say and neither did Dib, who did not really want to thank Zim for bringing his sister back from the stone soul she had been for so long.

"Mistress," Computer called over the communications system. "Tak has been located. She was again sent for janitorial service on the planet Dirt." Dirt was an Irken landfill planet. A planetary garbage dump. "On return she was transferred to the dookie snare machine, catching deliveries from orbiting sewage ships. It was previously an unmanned region. Sometimes they miss."

"Oh, crap." Dib said. Then he realized what he said and slapped his forehead.

"Dib, would you like to call her? See how she's doing? I bet she'd like to leave that place."

"Yeah, right. It's not like they'd just let her quit, leave that place and run away to an alien civilization," Dib said. "It's clearly a punishment."

"Then go get her. Bring her home."

"Like that would happen. I may be able to hold off Zim, but any Irken planet has at least one garrison and some security forces. Even if they let me land, assuming I could get there which would take forever, they wouldn't let me leave with an escaped worker. I'd get shot down leaving."

"Dib, I've got a ship in the area. I could have it make a pick up on the way here," Gaz informed him. He waved her off.

"Computer, relay me to the _Doomwind._ Encrypted signal."

"One moment, Mistress."

"Gaz, you don't have to-" Dib tried to say.

Gaz put up a hand as a screen came to life. An Irken was looking at them, and she saluted crisply. "Lady Gaz! I am Lim of your Black Sheep unit. Beed is down inspecting the cargo holds and what space can be made available, such as the hangers and maintenance bays. I can have him up here in less than a minute."

"Lim, it is good to meet you. There is no need to interrupt Beed. This is my brother Dib," Gaz made the introduction. She saw the puzzled look at the word brother. "We were birthed from the same bondmates."

"Lady Gaz, your genetic donors were bondmates _too?_" Lim asked.

"Here on Earth, there are billions of bondmates." Lim's curled antennae straightened at that. "I just called because I have a hypothetical question to ask. I understand there are only thirty in your squadron and running the ship right now. My brother is concerned about someone he knows working on Dirt. Purely hypothetically speaking, would you be able to swing by and pick her up if she wanted to leave?" Lim nodded. "And if she was not allowed to leave, could you conduct a rescue mission and yank her out?"

"Lady Gaz. We currently have thirty space superiority craft in our launch bays. Tactical systems are very light but operational. A few _security guards," _Lim nearly spat those words, "will be of no consequence. If you wish us to move immediately, using the Hypergate, we can be there in an hour. Give us a week, and we can have a mass driver rigged in the landing bay for orbital strikes to level any instillation on the planet. Another four days to cut up enough asteroids and we can level the whole place. Give us three weeks, and we can have it rigged so _Doomwind_ can engage single cruisers and capital ships. That would, of course, require us to make many round trips back to Irk space for the logistics operation. We are currently understaffed and looking into taking on more hands. There are no limits to staff, but each Governor may only have a maximum of one hundred personal guards. Being bondmates, you may have one hundred _each._ We can also take aboard another thirty Spittle Runners, or another ninety if we store them in the landing and maintenance bays. It would slow launch and recovery operations, but-"

Gaz held up a hand, interrupting Lim. "Thank you, Lim. That was exactly what I wanted to know. This is just for my brother's sake. He is a worrier, after all. Now the next question is a simple one also for my brother's sake. Would you do it if I asked?"

Lim offered no hesitation at all. "At once, Lady Gaz. You only have to give the order."

"Thank you, Lim. That is all I needed. And about the hiring thing? Can you try to keep it low profile and quiet? And stick to hiring smallests if you can. If you or Beed can find someone suited to do so, let them handle it. You don't have to do that yourselves. Oh, and no prisoners or slave labor, understood?" Lim nodded vigorously. "That is all. Lady Gaz out."

The display blanked and Gaz turned to her brother. "See, Dib? We can get her in an hour. It's not impossible. Do you want to?"

"No, I don't think so," Dib said. "I remember Tak being real big on revenge, and she can really hold a grudge. Besides, it's most likely she blames us for her being sent there. I don't think she'd be overjoyed to see us unless it was to roast our guts on a spit."

Dib turned to face his sister. "But thanks anyway. You know Gaz, for someone who never wanted to get involved, you've become a real player out there. How?"

"Accidentally. Seems being made an Irken Co-governor of a planet, even as a joke, comes with some serious perks."

They didn't say much more for awhile. Before Gaz could head back upstairs to bed Dib spoke up, pulling out the scrapbook and turning to the last insert. "When I was looking through your scrapbook, I also saw this picture. I really freaked when I saw that, Gaz. Especially after, uh, today. Mind if you tell me what that's all about?"

"It's not a comfortable subject, Dib." There was a pause before Gaz continued. "Part of me had just realized that being officially bonded to Zim was a lifetime thing, and being from entirely different planets I would never in my life, um, have what everyone at school thinks I'm having. Zim was just trying to cheer me up. It's just a simulation of what Zim can make in the lab."

"That's kind of creepy," Dib commented.

"Yeah, it is to a human. But it's sort of sweet too."

Gaz kept looking at the picture for a few more moments. Then she reached out and touched it. "Dib? You know the really weird thing? I know she's not real, just some theoretical numbers in Computer's memory if Zim saved his work. But I almost miss her. Like I can't wait to someday meet her."


	17. Chapter 16

A/N: Once again, thanks to my reviewers! Zerg170, MojaveRuler151, Kazehana23, InfiniteReader, Already-Lost-It, crazyanimefreak15, and Catgirlfireflare. Thank you all for your encouragement.

Kazehana23: Thanks for the suggestion about the Professor. Most of it would be really complicated for me to fit in with how I envision the path of the rest of this story. But I am going to use your suggestion about an unannounced visit. Hope you like it! Thanks!

Also: In this chapter, and the next, will be many many references that those of us raised on cattle and dairy farms know too well. You city slickers? You have been warned.

* * *

Dib pulled the last memory chip from the instrument panel and powered down Tak's ship. He hadn't seen all of the footage. Most of it, yes, but not all of it. There was no need. Dib had seen enough. Really.

He had seen Zim's initial collapse and his sister responding with a survival instinct to focus on what needed to be done to keep going until she too could collapse in his hammock. He had seen Zim and Gaz's movements, their efforts to comfort the other. He had heard their recorded conversations. Zim's confessions that even when she was a filthy mess, Zim didn't find her to be disgusting. That he didn't, couldn't, hold her being human against her. That she could even be beautiful to Zim.

He had heard the recording of Gaz's confession, that she couldn't abandon Zim, cared for him. Dib had seen Zim's instinctive protective response for Gaz when she discovered that there was a PAK in the package the Tallest sent her. How Gaz kept trying to look after Zim that first day when he was having so much difficulty coping. The tormented look on Zim's face at the sick joke the Tallest had played on them when they sent the smeet chamber as a gift along with that PAK. The tears, and not just of emotional stress, that she had shed as well. Her long forgotten tender side coming visible once again for someone she discovered she cared for deeply.

Dib simply couldn't bear to keep watching. It wasn't like spying on Zim in the past. There was no plot, no scheme, no deviousness. There was no threat to mankind here. Just two people trying to find their way out of shock and to cope with the unexpected. One of them was his sister. It was too personal. To private. Something that felt like he had no right to see.

He left the garage, turning off the light and headed up to his room. If he was fortunate, he could get three hours of sleep, and get some more during his first period study hall at skool. Once at the top of the stairs, he saw the door to Gaz's bedroom was open.

Dib paused in the hallway, then knocked quietly on the doorjamb. There was a rustling heard from inside the room, and as Dib's eyes began to adjust to the lack of light, Zim appeared in the doorway. The alien was still in his disguise as he entered the hallway and pulled the bedroom door closed behind him.

"What do you want, Dib-monkey?" Zim tried to whisper. He had a hostile expression on his face. "You are not going to disturb Gaz-blossom's sleep!"

_Gaz-blossom? _Dib thought. But he didn't pause. He could recognize a protective stance when he saw one. Dib felt protective of Gaz too. "I won't, Zim. I, uh, wanted to talk with you." Dib scratched his head trying to think of how to proceed as they tried to whisper back and forth. Yelling was normal for them. "We've been enemies for a long time. Can we be honest with each other for a minute? For Gaz? I reviewed what she gave me."

Zim nodded impatiently for Dib to continue. "Look, Zim. I practically had to raise my sister as my own kid. I know she can look after herself, but-" Dib paused and licked his dry lips. "Zim, Gaz is important to you, isn't she? Do you love her? My sister?"

Zim's expression softened and the alien looked briefly at the floor, then back at Dib. "It is true. Zim loves his Gaz-blossom very much. Perhaps not like a human can, but Zim does."

"She's important to me too," replied Dib. "If something were to happen to her-" He looked straight at Zim. "Do you understand?"

Zim didn't say anything, but Dib saw. Zim understood.

The alien finally spoke. "Dib-monkey. Zim would even protect his Gaz-blossom from his Tallest. Zim would destroy any who would dare harm her. _Anyone. _That includes other Irkens."

Dib took a deep breath. He really hated this part, but he had messed up very badly at skool. "Zim. You and Gaz didn't have a ceremony, did you? The human customary one? Listen, if you two decide you want it, I'll perform the ceremony myself. I owe her that and more."

The human took a few steps toward his own room then stopped and turned back. There was tears of anguish in his eyes. "Gaz is your wife now. Just… take care of my sister." Dib paused again. "If this is a trick-" He couldn't go on.

Zim looked at Dib. The human was handing over to his worst and inhuman enemy his most precious relation. Zim may be Irken, but now he understood enough to begin to imagine what his human enemy was going through in this matter. They had a common importance between them.

"Dib." Dib's eared perked up. There wasn't the usual insults or put-down titles attached to the address. "Gaz-blossom has repeatedly told Zim that we are now family. Brothers. This sickens me. But much has also changed. Zim has a human _wife _now," his mouth twisted around the human word "who is important to him, and has been charged with the defense of his bondmate's world. Zim was not trained nor educated for this. Zim… may need, um, need advice at times."

Dib heard this. He also heard what Zim didn't say, but meant with his fumbling gesture. _It is not a trick._ Dib took another breath. "Perhaps another day. I'm going to bed."

Zim nodded and turned away to the door leading to Gaz's room, but stopped and looked back when Dib once more said his name. "Zim? When you go back in there. Uh. You can close the door behind you. A couple ought to have their privacy."

Dib went to his own room, secretly entered the code on the security pad by the door and quickly escaped inside. He hoped he could get to sleep after that horrible discussion.

Zim went into Gaz's room and closed the door behind him. The alien made his way back to his hammock. As he settled in, he heard Gaz speak up. "I heard all that, you know." She sat up in her own bed.

The alien looked at her puzzled. She answered the unasked question. "I'm not used to footsteps in my room at night trying to sneak around. When you closed the door, I got up to listen in."

"Zim is sorry for disturbing your sleep, Gaz-blossom. Zim will punish the Dib in the morning."

"Zim, don't. I'm glad I got to hear that. It made me very happy. Do you understand what that was all about?"

He thought he did. The words seemed simple enough to understand.

"That was probably the most difficult thing my brother has or ever will do in his whole life. Zim, he was giving us his blessing. Accepted you into our family."

* * *

Zim got up at 6:00am as quietly as he could so he wouldn't disturb his Gaz-blossom's peaceful slumber. He silently opened and then closed the bedroom door with a bar of his cleansing chalk in his hand and entered the bathroom, closing that door as well.

* * *

Professor Membrane hurried into his house. He couldn't believe he had forgotten his Peruvian Flu Snails again! He trotted up the stairs and opened the unlocked bathroom door in a rush.

He stood tall in the doorway. Inside was Zim, shirtless and holding a bar of cleansing chalk in between his antennae. His wig was resting on the ledge of the bathroom sink. The alien stared back at the Professor, his eyes so wide in horror that his contacts popped out and fell to the floor, showing Zim in all his shirtless alien glory.

"Oh. Hi there, Bill," the Professor calmly said as he opened the medicine cabinet and removed the jar of Peruvian Flu Snails. "You look better than last time we met. When did you get in town?"

Both Dib and Gaz awoke to very loud screaming. "DON'T DISSECT MEEE! I'M HUMAN!" echoed through the hallways as they rushed out in their pajamas and saw their father standing in the bathroom opposite their rooms.

Gaz stopped in the hallway in terror. Her Zim had been discovered! "Dib!" she cried for help, not knowing what to do. The only solution she knew was to start dooming people, but this was her family! Trying for amnesia via blunt force trauma was too risky, but Zim could be taken away! Did her father already call the lab? A tsunami of what if's raced through her mind. She was too unaccustomed to the impact of this side of caring for someone when they were in trouble.

Dib rushed into the now crowded bathroom. A horrified Zim was backed into a corner, yelling that he was human, normal, just had a skin condition and pink eye. That he liked rain, had one stomach, was wearing pants and any other random excuse that could escape his runaway mouth as he babbled. The Professor was just saying something about a bill.

"Dad! Dad! Don't hurt him!" Dib yelled. He couldn't believe he was doing this. Dib grabbed his father's arm. "Don't send him to the lab or the basement! It's true he's an alien, but he's on our side! He can help protect Earth! His name is Zim! DAD! You can't do it! He's Gaz's _husband!"_

Professor Membrane just looked at Zim for a moment. "Oh, my mistake. You reminded me of my college roommate Bill. Don't mind my poor insane son." He turned and put a condescending hand on Dib's shoulder. "Now, son. There are no such thing as aliens. It's clear that this young man was just a victim of some insect getting into another teleporter experiment and splicing them together. It happened to my old roommate Bill. They even made a poorly researched movie about it called '_The Moth.'_ " He raised both fists in the air in righteous indignation. "WHEN will these young people _listen_ to my lectures and start putting screen doors on their teleportation experiments!"

He just as quickly dropped back down to calm and guided Dib out of the bathroom, holding his jar of Flu Snails, and down the stairs. "Daughter, why don't you bring your young man downstairs for a moment? I can spare a whole five minutes to meet him properly."

Gaz rushed into the bathroom and slammed into Zim, giving him a bear hug. "Zim! It's okay. It's okay. It's okay," she kept repeating. She wasn't sure who she was trying to reassure more. Zim or herself.

"Gaz. Gaz, you're hurting Zim," the alien gurgled. Gaz quickly let go and helped put Zim's shirt on and the wig back over his antennae while he put the contacts back in. Then they went downstairs, still trying to recover from the shock they just experienced.

The two sat down together on the couch with Professor Membrane sitting nearby. "So, your name is Zim, is it? How did you two meet?"

"We met at skool," was Zim's understandably short response.

"I see. And how do you feel about human test trials?" the Professor asked.

"Experimenting on humans is one of my favorite subjects."

"Hey!" protested Dib, who had been some of those experiments.

"And Federal Regulators controlling when an experiment is ready for human testing?"

"Fed-er-ul Reg-olaters?" Zim asked. "Never heard of them."

The Professor reached over with his long arm and slapped Zim across the shoulder laughing. "Ha! I like his style, Daughter. Stupid Federal Laws, telling me when an experiment is safe enough. How DARE they impede SCIENCE! When he's ready for a job bring him down to the lab. I could use more like him!"

"Are you kidding me?" Dib yelled out.

"If only my poor insane son would turn to REAL SCIENCE!" The Professor lamented. "He too could help me cure diseases! Mutate faster growing crops! Give people organs that secretes its own coffee! Now, Daughter, Sane Son, when can I expect some grandchildren?"

"What?" "DAD!" "MY EARS!" Zim, Gaz and Dib all cried out in unison. Gaz was turning lobster red and Zim a very dark green. Dib ran over to the kitchen sink and began pumping soap into his ears.

"You should really hurry on that. I have thirty-two assistants I would like to replace as soon as possible. _Always_ nagging about laws and protocols when SCIENCE awaits!" the Professor proclaimed, pointing a finger in the air.

"Uh, Dad." Gaz stumbled. "Zim's DNA is, uh, mutated. Remember? I don't know if we're compatible for… that." The girl was almost turning purple now. They all _really_ wanted this conversation to stop.

"Nonsense. If I can combine a cow with a pineapple I can fix you two up in no time! How does this afternoon sound? You two stop by the lab and- oops. Times up. Got to go! See you at our next Family Fun Night in four months! Good-bye Daughter, Sane Son, Insane Son!"

And just like that Professor Membrane leapt up the rushed out the door with his jar of Peruvian Flu Snails.

No one said anything for a while. Gaz spoke first. "It's alright, Zim. Could you go back upstairs and finish cleaning up? Dib and I will need the bathroom also before we leave for skool," Gaz requested. "You don't want steam to burn your skin."

The green alien returned upstairs in a daze. A minute later the water in the kitchen stopped running and Dib stepped into the living room rubbing a washcloth around his ears. Gaz motioned him to come over.

Dib sat down next to her. "Wow," he said. "That was beyond embarrassing. And so disturbing."

Gaz just sat there with a blank look for a second before responding. "Huh? Oh yeah. That."

Dib looked at his sister. "Gaz?"

"Dib, I almost lost him just now. We came a hairbreadth away from Zim ending up on a slab somewhere." She looked back at her brother. "A few minutes ago I almost became a widow, Dib. I almost became a widow before Zim and I could even get started for real. I couldn't do anything. The only thing I could do was start assaulting people. Assault Dad. But what good would that have done? Dad could have called the lab. He could have… have-"

Dib pulled Gaz close and draped an arm around her. He hadn't realized this aspect of Zim's close call. That Gaz had almost been made a widow. A few weeks ago when all this first started Zim had told him that Gaz was like a fortress with a fragile center that was defended at all cost to prevent collapse. Dib, her own brother, had never really known of its existence but Zim had picked up on it. And now Dib was seeing it first hand.

Gaz kept going. "And then he talked about kids. Dib, it was beyond embarrassing but I was almost seeing my future flash before my eyes. I could almost see their faces, ones that came so close to never having a chance to exist."

She pulled back to look at her brother. "But you jumped right in. You tried to reason, persuade. Dad's never believing in you may have saved Zim's life today. I feel so weak. I used to be strong, but now…"

"Gaz, I hate to say it, but you've never understood what it means to be strong," Dib told her. "Tough and strong are not always the same thing."

She almost glared at him, but didn't really have it in her. Dib elaborated. "Gaz, you always thought that being strong meant not having any soft spots at all. No vulnerabilities. But that only makes you impervious to what is around you. Cold. Empty. A rock. But rocks shatter or explode because they can't bend or be squeezed under pressure. Being strong doesn't mean not being affected or knocked for a loop when something happens. It means being able to get back up on your feet and to keep going. It means being able to bend and be shaken when you take a hit. It means letting yourself lean on others when it gets to be too much. To have the courage to let yourself be vulnerable enough to care about someone. That's what you've been doing, even carrying Zim on your back while you do so. You're not weak. Not at all. You're just not used to this kind of strength because right now it feels like vulnerability."

"Dib? I, um. I can't lose him."

"I know. I see that now for myself. It's okay to say it, Gaz. It's okay to admit things."

"But you hate him. I've had to put up with your stupid anti-Zim rants over and over. Every time I've started to mention something involving Zim-"

Dib patted his sister's shoulder. He hadn't realized the extra pressure he had added to her situation. "I know I can be obsessive. I'll try to do better. Zim isn't the Invader he used to be. I know that too. He loves you Gaz, in his own alien way. He really does. He loves a human. If he can do that, then perhaps there is hope. Maybe he needs you to be that better person, just as much as you need him."

Dib thought about his own words. He knew what he had to do. It would be difficult. But this was for his sister.

"Gaz? Stop with this 'real' hooey." Dib touched her bonding necklace. "What you have is real. What you are going through is real. Just because you and he aren't living that life yet doesn't mean it isn't real. It's weird and all, but real. Gaz. I'll do better about Zim. I promise. Go on, now. Admit it. What it is I don't want to hear."

"Dib. I love Zim. Very much so. I got married and it turns out I love him. I want that future with Zim."

"Keep going, Gaz," Dib coached. "Open up to what Zim is now. You're much more than friends, and it's too late to start off with being his girlfriend. Don't worry about not being ready for the future. Just accept what you are now. It's okay to say it, Gaz."

"Dib. I, um. Zim is my husband, and I want to be _in_ love with him too."

Dib gave his sister a final squeeze and got up. "You will. Or maybe you already are. But you'll figure it out."

"Listen, I heard you and Zim talking last night," Gaz said. "Could you really do it? A ceremony for Zim and I? How?"

"Yeah. It's a little something that was included in my 'Lil Paranormal Investigator Exorcism Kit I got a few years ago. Don't worry about it."

Dib walked away and to the stairs. Zim was standing at the top. When Dib approached, Zim whispered, being out of earshot of Gaz for a moment. "You defended Zim. You… Zim heard you speaking to Gaz-blossom. Even though you hate Zim you support us."

"Yeah, Zim. We do things for family we wouldn't do for anyone else," Dib informed the alien. "And as much as it makes me nauseous, you are part of this crazy family now."

Zim looked like he was trying to concentrate. Or pass gas. "Zim has difficulty comprehending, but is beginning to see."

"I'm glad to hear that, Zim. Why don't you go downstairs. Gaz could use some time with you right now," Dib suggested.

Zim left and Dib went into his room to gather fresh clothes. As he went to the bathroom, an idea occurred to him. Normally something like this would be a sign that he had a death wish, but now? Things were different today. Dib snuck into Gaz's room and grabbed one of her customary black dresses from her dirty laundry. Then he tiptoed over and tossed it into the washer with a lot of bleach.

Dib took his shower quickly, letting the running water help cover up the sound of the washer. He completed his normal bathroom routine by the time the washer was done, and Dib reached in and threw the dress in their Dad's insta-dryer. It wasn't quite instant, but it was fast.

By the time Gaz finished getting ready for the day and left the bathroom, Dib was standing at the bottom of the stairs with his hands behind him. Zim was standing off to one side watching. "Listen, Gaz. I wanted to offer you something to show that I'm serious. That I'll support you even if I don't like it. Please don't kill me."

"Dib-" Gaz started to say crossly, walking down toward him. Then she stopped.

Her brother held out one of her dresses in front of him, as a gift. Perhaps also as a shield.

It was pure white.

"I thought that like your old life, this could be transformed to help you into your new one," Dib told his sister. "If you want a ceremony, you'll need a wedding dress. You can hang it up in your closet until you're ready."

Gaz slowly walked down and took the dress from her brother. It was just one of her ordinary dresses that had undergone a deliberate laundry accident, but to her it was beautiful.

"Thank you, Dib. I don't know what to say," she said breathlessly.

"You could give me a lift to skool. I'm too tired to drive myself."

* * *

Their Jeep pulled up into the hi-skool parking lot. Gaz slapped Dib's knee, who was almost asleep in the back. He yawned and grabbed his books.

"Dib? I need to talk with Zim alone for a minute. See you at lunch?" Gaz asked.

Dib just mumbled something and hopped out of the back of the Jeep. Or more accurately, fell out in a controlled fashion. He wandered in to the building to his first period study hall where he could get some more sleep. It had been a long night and a difficult morning as well.

After Dib disappeared into the skool, Gaz opened up to Zim. "Listen, Zim. Do you understand all of what people were saying about me yesterday? The rumors going around?"

Zim looked at Gaz. "Much of what has been said has been out of Zim's hearing and fragmentary. There were many incomplete murmurs. But Zim understands that there was much mindless chatter about us becoming bondmates. Many were rightly punished."

"It's more than that. Zim, in this culture, humans don't become bondmates while still in hi-skool. No one is ready for that sort of thing yet. The only reason two might do that before they're ready is if they, um, did something stupid. Careless."

"Were we not careless as well?" Zim asked.

"Zim, please be careful of what you say from now on. Not that kind of careless. Zim, they think I'm carrying a smeet."

"They must be blind, because there is nothing in your arms," Zim retorted.

Gaz had to let out a ghost of a smile at that. "No, Zim. Not in my arms. Inside me. Like a smeet chamber."

Zim's eyes grew wide at that. Gaz took his hand. "Zim, even though it's not true, many people will always believe that's what happened to us. That that is why we're together. From now on there is going to be a lot of whispers and looks in our direction. Questions about what happened. Just remember that they aren't staring at you because they see you're Irken. It's at both of us because they think there is a mini Zim or Gaz inside me. We're going to have to just shrug it off unless they get too obvious about it. Not even I could get away with dooming every single classmate every day."

Gaz took a breath before continuing. "I decided to go into the office today and change my classes for next semester. I realize I am a bondmate now and I want to start preparing for what my new role will be. I'll drop Metal Shop and Art for Advanced Personal Finance and Home Ec. They may make it mandatory for me to take some child development class. It's going to reinforce what everyone thinks."

"Gaz-blossom. Zim does not care what the stupid humans think. It is their fault for being stupid. Zim will laugh at their foolishness."

"A lot of people may start asking really personal questions. Just tell them that you and I are none of their business. Okay, Zim? Just try not to respond to their provocations. Eventually they should get bored and find something else to gossip about. All right?"

Zim nodded, and the two left the vehicle and entered the skool building arm in arm as a couple.

* * *

After they had stopped by the school office for Gaz to request a new class schedule for next semester, they found themselves running a bit late. So Zim had walked Gaz to her locker and then rushed off to his own. As Gaz picked out the needed books for her first class, Zita opened up her own locker just a few feet away.

"Gaz?"

"Hey, Zita," Gaz mumbled.

"I just wanted to ask if you are all right," Zita said.

Gaz looked at the girl next to her. Zita was a mild-mannered and caring person with a soft yet humorous personality. Gaz would allow this since she was inquiring out of honest concern, unlike most of the students. Nothing had been said outright, but even the staff she had spoken to in the office wore expressions that showed what they were thinking.

"We're trying to be. I don't think I've gotten a good night's sleep this past week, trying to cope with one crazy thing after another. It's been difficult for all of us."

"Gaz? I don't know how much of what I've heard is true, but if you want to talk-"

"Look, Zita." Gaz said. "You can't imagine what Zim and I have been through. If we had been paying attention we would have realized what it was we were signing and avoided this whole thing. So the part that I'm now Zim's ball and chain is correct. Plus Zim's people back home are real big on the 'till death do you part' thing so we're not backing out of this. But now thanks to my brother, everyone in skool thinks I'm just a stupid girl that got knocked up." She slammed her locker door.

"So, you're not-"

"No, I'm not." She paused for a moment to reflect. "But strangely, for the most part I'm glad things have worked out the way they have," Gaz remarked.

"Really?" Zita asked completely surprised.

"Yeah," Gaz said with a small smile. "Otherwise I never would have known how much he means to me, and what I mean to him. That we want to be together."

As Gaz hurried off to her class, Zita kept pace for a moment more. "You know, even if it was true that you had a bun in the oven, everyone will always know you as Gaz the Dark Fury. You could never be just another stupid girl."

Somehow what Zita said made the rumors more bearable without dooming everyone in town.

* * *

Near the end of the day, the skool intercom system came to life. "Zim, Gaz and Dib Membrane. Report to the Vice-Principal's office immediately."

The three left their respective classes and gathered on a bench outside the VP's office. After awhile the Vice-Principal called them inside. The three stood before his desk.

"Gaz, your request to change your class schedule for next semester was approved. The guidance councilor was pleased that you are finally stepping up to accept some responsibility. Of course in your condition you probably don't have much choice. Do you?"

The girl just put her hand to her face and shook her head.

The Vice-Principle went on. "However, you three delinquents have made a real mess for me. The cafeteria won't be in any condition to reopen until Monday. And then there is all those students stuck to the walls! You've thrown my attendance charts all out of whack! How do I count those students? They are present here in skool, but absent from their classes. They are present and absent at the same time! Can you imagine what that is doing to my charts?"

Dib, Zim and Gaz just looked at each other. The Vice-Principal had two married hi-skool students before him, one rumored to be expecting, and the brother screeching her spouse was an alien for years and in the past threatening to dissect the green student standing next to him, and the Vice-Principals was concerned about _this? _Those attendance charts weren't the only thing out of whack in this office.

"Now, Gaz. It is understandable that in your condition you are influenced by mood swings, but you must learn to deal with your changing hormones other than by taking it out on other students! Zim, it is natural to want stand up for her in her state, but you should help her deal with such imbalances constructively. Under the circumstances I am willing to show leniency this one time, and am sending you both to detention for a week."

The three students were too busy giving the Vice-Principal their best '_What the-'_ expressions to respond.

"Dib, you however should know better than to instigate a riot on the skool premises. That sort of behavior belongs in the streets! You are suspended for a week."

"Are you KIDDING me?" Dib shrieked.

The Vice-Principal shooed them out of his office and slammed the door behind them.

"Zim," Dib said coldly, "you are living proof that there is no such thing as Karma."

* * *

After being released from detention and being dropped off by Gaz so he could get his next PAK maintenance cycle, Zim entered his base alone to find everything in place. Nothing had been destroyed, damaged or scattered. There was no mud coating the flooring or footprints on the walls or ceiling. No scorch marks in the kitchen. Gir was just sitting quietly in the middle of the room watching _The Angry Monkey Show_ on the TV.

"Computer! How did you manage to get Gir to behave himself?" Zim asked loudly.

"Master, I bet Gir a taco that he couldn't do nothing but watch an _Angry Monkey_ marathon for forty-eight hours straight. There is eighteen hours remaining," Computer informed him.

"Why! Why did Zim not think of this before? It is so obvious!" Zim hollered. But deep down he knew the answer. Zim wasn't the perfect and awe inspiring being he thought he had been in the past. Far from it. But his Gaz-blossom loved him anyway, and knew the difference between being a Defect and having a flawed PAK. That went a long way, for Gaz was not one to tolerate substandard well.

Computer of course did not offer his own comment to what Zim said. "Master, the expansion for your new room is complete and some basic furnishings arrived while you were away. They have been moved in along with the PAK maintenance system. I also would suggest building a small workstation for Mistress with a secure data uplink. As Lady, she has responsibilities too, and needs to be able to communicate off world in a timely fashion when called upon. Waiting for her next random visit here to be informed of decisions she must make is insufficient. The modifications to her GameSlave 4 is too limited for these applications."

Zim stood on one of the hidden elevators in the living room. He wanted to and looked forward to building something new and helpful for Gaz, but it would have to wait. This past skool week had been indescribably difficult, and neither his life nor outlook would ever be the same. But Zim now knew that this would be a good thing, for his Gaz-blossom was worth whole worlds. Worth all that he was experiencing. He would and could adjust. Even with a flawed PAK, Zim was still Irken after all.

"Very well, Computer. After my maintenance cycle is complete. Zim has been under much strain again."

The platform descended into the base to Zim's new room. The alien entered and made a brief examination. Everything was red and black of course. The furnishings were basic, a large bed with a foam mattress with fairly typical coverings and pillows. Overhead was a reproduced picture of some supernova remnant. Two small end tables with lamps were positioned at the head of the bed with a set of dressers at the foot. A large wardrobe sat along one wall. One door led to a bathroom that included human plumbing and an excellent ventilation system for water vapor. Another led to another empty room that was nearly as large as the first.

"Computer, why is there such a large closet attached to this sleep room? We have plenty of space already. And there is no need for such a large nap platform," Zim nitpicked as he climbed onto the bed and laid down on his side.

The picture of the supernova remnant slid upward to reveal the PAK support interface and two cables snaked down and plugged into Zim's PAK. While working for Zim, Computer had learned to plan ahead to the best of his abilities and what Zim would let him get away with. So Computer hadn't answered Zim's remarks. He figured he would let Lady Gaz explain when the time was right. In another year or two Mistress would no doubt be moving in, so it made sense to set things up now when Computer had the opportunity to do so. The two bondmates could eventually figure out a need for an attached nursery on their own, when they were ready. Until then they could use it for whatever they thought it was.

* * *

After an early dinner, Dib sat on the roof of their house looking into the sky with his small satellite dish, recording device and headphones just like he did every Thursday. The sun had just set and the stars were coming out. But everything was different now. There was no invasion to single-handedly prevent. He still listened for alien transmissions and strange phenomena, but there would be no secret orders waiting to be intercepted. Not that Dib trusted Zim implicitly, not even close. But the mountain of evidence he had gone over last night could not be refuted. With that context Dib had gone through the database on Tak's ship for records on Zim. There were very few remaining after the AI deletions, but it was enough. Earth was worth everything to the Armada as Zim's prison and worth nothing as anything else.

And knowing there was no escape pod floating out there was a relief, yet at the same time the silence of that particular frequency was a bit of a distressing reminder in itself now.

Gaz walked out onto the roof with her GameSlave 4 in her hands. She hadn't touched her games since the CWZ convention. She sat down next to Dib, her game beeping. They didn't say anything for awhile.

Her brother took off his headphones and roughly set them down on the roof's surface. Gaz's game continued to beep, but she noted the expression on her brother's face.

"Can't concentrate?" she asked.

"Not really," came the answer.

"I know what you mean," Gaz replied. "My games aren't the same right now."

"You miss him, don't you?" Dib asked.

"Yeah," his sister said. "We haven't been separated like this since Sunday morning and have been through a lot in that short time. We've depended on each other to get through it. But Zim looked better this afternoon than he had, and he needs to sleep a few hours tonight. We know we have to do this at some point. He's safer at his base, and I need my room to get a good nights sleep. But if he starts having trouble, at least Computer can text me over my GameSlave. What about you?"

Dib thought for a moment. "I don't know. It's crazy how things can change in a single day." Gaz nodded. She indeed knew that feeling well. "I guess I feel kind of lost. Zim isn't trying to take over the planet. The Armada isn't planning to invade because we're worth less than isolating Zim. I don't really know what I'm supposed to be listening for."

"And getting suspended for nothing didn't help any, did it?" she asked.

"It upset me for awhile, but I guess I'm just used to getting crap tossed at me," Dib commented. Then winced as the phrase reminded him of someone far away.

Gaz caught on to the response to his own wording on her brother's face. "Is it distracting? Knowing what happened to her? Knowing there is no escape pod floating up there. It's like listening to a hole within the silence, isn't it?"

Dib just nodded. Gaz paused her game. Her brother was a very compassionate person. He usually did his best to look for the good in people and the things around him regardless of what was flung at him in return. When Dib cared about some subject, project, or person, he really cared with all he had. Whether it deserved it or not made no difference. Well, except for Zim's case. While Dib may be a bit obsessive, willing to go to even disturbing extremes and had a bit of a mania problem, he was a romantic to the core. Idealistic to a fault, passionate about what he believed in and cared about, and willing to go to enormous lengths. Needing to do what he felt was the right thing even if it cost him. Gaz had always thought Dib to be a weak fool to not be as impervious as she had been, but she was learning there were different types of strengths.

"You know you need to put your mind at ease."

"Yeah, I know. But it's not like I could trust anything she says."

Gaz pulled her brother up and guided him down into the garage. The two of them stood next to Tak's ship. "You can just send a message, Dib," she told him. "You don't have to talk face to face."

Dib nodded an acknowledgement and climbed into the cockpit. Gaz reached inside and pressed a few buttons on the instrument panel.

"Computer?" she asked.

"Yes, Mistress?" he answered.

"Please send us the communications frequency and routing information for a message to Planet Dirt. Addressed to Tak."

"Yes, Mistress. The firewall protecting the memory core of the ship in Dib's possession requires an authorization before I can upload the necessary communications protocols." Computer informed her over the speakers.

Dib hesitated for a long minute, then input the necessary codes. A series of numbers, ciphers and relay station addresses loaded into the communications system's memory. "Upload complete. Will there be anything else, Mistress?" Computer asked.

"No, I believe that will be all for tonight."

Computer signed off. Gaz stepped to the back of the garage to give her brother a moment of privacy and returned to her GameSlave.

* * *

Tak hobbled up the mound. Her knee joint was stiff and was inflamed as usual. Three of her toes had been broken and never healed properly, giving her a slight limp. She made her way up the mound to her escape pod that had been her home for the last seven years. It was roughly three miles from the dookie snare machine. The cursed captains of the sewage ships missed on occasion, and their orbital drops could be suspiciously accurate for direct impacts on her escape pod. Each time it happened it took a week to dig it out of the growing mound.

She sighed, and coughed some more. Even with her respirator, the stench was impossible to evade. It didn't cover her antennae after all. She was surrounded by a thousand miles of nothing but muck. Her pod had been stripped of its propulsion and most of its systems. Escape was impossible. The first time it had taken decades to build a ship from the scraps dumped on Dirt. It was made sure that there would not be a second time. She could not walk out. It was too far and she could not carry enough vital nutrients for the journey that would last a few months at least. Plus she had to actually catch much of her 'food.' What ever those things were that crawled around out there, these couldn't sustain her. A ship dropping a supply crate of missing nutrients from the sky did not come around very often.

Her job was a hoax. Supposedly she was there to maintain the machine and ensure it worked properly, but it was designed to never break down or malfunction for it's entire service life. It was a _dookie snare_ after all. No one would ever design such a device to need people to function under any circumstances. This particular device still had three hundred years left on its service life. The rest of her 'assignment' consisted of driving a primitive tractor pushing around muck to keep the area somewhat level, not that is was actually necessary.

Not to mention that a bar of mere cleansing chalk was no use here. She hadn't been given a protective suit to wear.

Tak slowly climbed into her pod and pulled the canopy closed. After all this time the grime slowly clogging crevices and collecting in wiring and circuits had taken it's toll. The pod was barely functional. Off to one side was Mimi. She was forced to tear apart the robot after it went berserk during her dogfight with Zim in her attempt to hijack his mission. Attempts to put the custom built SIR unit into working order had failed. Parts were damaged during the disassembly, and all the crud that got everywhere shorted circuit pathways. The robot was whole, but not functioning.

Tak pulled off her respirator, shut her eyes and sat back in the single seat that took up most of the space in the escape pod. After a long while she opened them again and saw a blinking message on one of the few side displays still functional. _Recorded message: Dirt- Dookie Manager Tak _it blinked.

She pressed a button. The first message she had received in seven years began to play. The first face that had spoken to her in all that time appeared. A human face. One she recognized from long ago. It was different, and yet the same.

"Hey, Tak. It's Dib. I don't know if you remember me, but you were in my class when you tried to hollow out my homeworld. I'm not exactly sure what to say here. You probably hate us for wrecking your plans and may be burning this recording by now. I just learned what happened to you last night, Tak. I hope it's not as bad as it sounds. I hope you are all right. Look, I'm relieved your not going around invading planets and destroying innocent people, but I'm so sorry to hear about where you ended up. You deserved much better than that. I just had to say something, Tak. I didn't hear your escape beacon for a long time and didn't know if you made it or not. You're probably full of hate and rage at us, but we had to stop you. You planned to have my homeworld invaded. I wish things could have been different. Maybe if you hadn't been after my planet… well I suppose there is no point in thinking like that. Good-bye, Tak. I'd like to think that things will get better for you eventually."

The message ended. She replayed it a full ten more times. It was the only face she had seen since Earth that had not looked down upon her with contempt. The first face looking at her in seven years.

Tak was the best of her peer group, the brightest and most resourceful. She should have been one of the Irken elite, an Invader. The Tallest had promised, but she now knew that they had lied to her just as they had to Zim.

The first time the escaped from Dirt, she had not realized that she was also abandoning her post. Her assignment. She had been a deserter. They would never have let her be a real Invader after that. But the Tallest had strung her along and let her have a shot at taking over a disguised exile. That would have been her reward had she succeeded. A fake title with a fake mission and a planet no one wanted. She had seen this after the years of watching broadcasts of Zim on _Irkens Funniest Blunders._ And then there was that last broadcast, which was not only of Zim being overpowered by a human and bonded, but his call to the Tallest for help.

Irk wanted to be rid of Zim, and had gotten rid of her.

Tak looked out of the canopy and took in the muckscape. She had always been taught that Invaders needed no one, and an Invader was what everyone aspired to be. But Tak was never going to become an Invader. And she could not flee on her own.

The pod was slowly deteriorating. Eventually it would no longer be a shelter. Tak looked at the rolling mounds outside. As she often did, she thought of how she wasn't going to leave this place. She would eventually die here, and a mound of sewage would be her unmarked grave. Tears appeared in her solid purple eyes.

There was one place that didn't hold anything against her, at least until the end when her plan went into effect. It was a lousy planet, but compared to here, it was paradise. When she had attended the skool, her classmates had respect for her. Thought she was just fine. Even a little popular. Some even laughed with her. She had just gone along with it for the sake of her assignment against Zim, but the humans had been sincere. Like the now young man speaking on the replaying message. The one that had sent her the only message she had received in all this time out of concern for what had happened to her.

Tak reached back and pulled Mimi into her lap. The pod's communications system had been partially gutted. It could receive broadcasts still, but not transmit. No one wanted her to be able to constantly call out in protest or demand another chance. Tak opened up a panel in Mimi's chest and began pulling out circuit modules and trying to rub them clean with her dirty shirt. She should be able to rig up something that could work long enough before these circuits burned out.

* * *

Dib was on his bed reading one of his paranormal magazines when his wristwatch signaled an alert being generated from Tak's ship. He rushed downstairs and into the garage. As he came around the hull and saw into the cockpit, a display was flashing a message. _Recorded Message: Earth- Dib._

"Gaz!" he yelled for his sister to come at once.

She entered the garage, not happy that her attempts to find some calm and get her mind off of things with her game had been interrupted. Then she too saw the flashing display. Gaz turned off her GameSlave.

"Go on," Gaz prodded her brother.

Her brother reached into the cockpit and pressed a button. An image appeared as the message began to play.

They both gasped. Tak looked beyond terrible. Her eyes were sunk in, and she was filthy, like a person who hadn't bathed in years. She looked positively emaciated. And for an Irken, that was something. When she began to speak her voice was raspy, her lips cracked and slightly blistered.

"Dib. I remember you well. Yours was the first message I've gotten since they dropped me here. I can receive, but I don't know how long this jury-rigged fix will last, so I won't be able to transmit again. They don't even assign slaves or prisoners to this place. I want to come back, but I know it won't happen. There is no way out of this place for me. But I'm sending my coordinates anyway. I can only hope that maybe someday after I'm gone that someone will bury me in a star rather in the sewage that surrounds me. The past, it wasn't about revenge. Well, maybe a little. But they promised me a chance to be among the Elite and Zim was in the way. They lied. They set me up only to take out Zim."

The image of Tak began to tell of what her life had been like. It went on for only another minute until static steadily replaced the image until the signal was lost completely.

Dib turned his head and looked at his sister. She looked back and knew.

Earth was no longer under threat from invasion. Zim was no longer a direct threat. And Dib always did have a definite savior complex going on in his mental framework.

She put a hand on his shoulder. "You know that just because she's had it bad doesn't mean she's changed for the better. Just because she wants out doesn't mean that she won't want to strike back. It may have made her worse."

"I know, Gaz. Don't forget who your talking to. Protecting Earth has been a long standing project of mine," Dib retorted. "But what can I do? Sure, I've got her ship and it's the fastest craft they have, but it could still take months to get there. Plus I can't navigate to another star system manually."

"I'll let Zim know I'm coming. We can figure something out and make a few calls," Gaz said in return. "You start packing what you'll need. Pack light because you will have to take enough water to last. I'll see about cleansing gel." She gave his shoulder a squeeze. "Dib, you just happen to have a week off from skool and no need to keep guard here. Maybe Karma exists after all."

Dib left and drove to the store. Much of what he would need they didn't have on hand. He'd need a lot of water, something eatable that did not require refrigeration or cooking. Also high energy stuff with large doses of carbohydrates. Moist toilettes for himself. He also picked out a thick white sweater and sweatpants. He figured someone who lived like that would find some comfort in a color that represented clean. Dib just hoped white didn't represent something like 'I have gas' or worse to an Irken.

* * *

Zim was waiting outside when Gaz arrived. "Zim does not like this," he said as they walked into the base and took the elevator down. "Tak is very good, resourceful, does not forget, and held Zim responsible for her misfortunes before. She could still be a threat."

"I know. I reminded Dib to be careful. But do you really think Dib of all people would allow Tak anywhere near Earth if she was a threat? Remember, we all had a hand in her being sent back to Dirt. But this is something Dib needs to do. We can trust him in this."

They entered the computer lab. Gaz placed a memory chip in the control panel.

"Computer," Zim commanded. "Analyze this recording and begin estimating needed medical supplies."

"Also put me in touch with Beed on the _Doomwind._ Urgent," Gaz added.

After about two minutes Beed appeared on the main display. "Governor Zim, Lady Gaz."

"Beed," Gaz began, "we've had something come up last minute. Yesterday I talked to Lim about a hypothetical operation. It's going into effect now. We need to come up with a travel plan quickly. Our biggest problem we face at the moment is speed. I need to get a single pilot craft from Earth to Dirt to you quickly with a navigational system missing an AI. I figure you're the person to go to for this problem."

"Understood," Beed responded. "The second leg is not a problem. Dirt is close by. Send me the coordinates and I will make arrangements. I will transmit the details when they are made."

"Beed, my brother is going on this mission. I need him escorted through Irk system space and help him dock with you. He is to be treated as my guest. His passenger will be needing medical attention but keep her under guard. She might be dangerous. Also, I need you to be ready to respond if he gets in trouble along the way."

"Yes, Lady Gaz. A flight of Spittle Runners can meet with him enroute from Dirt and escort him the rest of the way. The rest can be standing by here to send through the hypergate if needed."

Zim broke into the conversation. "Sentinel Beed. I am sending you a list of equipment and supplies, plus a quartermaster to contact. It is an equipment package for a Governor's security unit that you are entitled to. It is extremely unlikely, but if my Bondmate's brother gets into trouble you may need it. Do not hesitate to be forceful in speaking to them if required."

"Lim will get to work on that right away," Beed informed them. "We have a list of temporary additional personnel for your attention. As there are only thirty of us right now and with an operation underway, this must be addressed. However this normally requires your review and approval."

Gaz took a breath. "Beed, you are the man on the scene right now. You guys know the people, their skills, their temperament and what they can do. Filter down what is needed, and who fits in best. They will have to get used to dealing with humans, so double check how well and willing they can handle xenophobia. Send the list to us and we'll see it gets approved."

Beed was making notes on a Pad. "Understood. We will have the short list to you in a couple hours. Also, the first delivery of the cargo containers arrived this morning. But we shall have the entire landing deck clear by the time your brother arrives."

* * *

Quartermaster Toob sat at his desk with his feet up. It was almost the end of his day when the call came in. A very large and unhappy Irken appeared on his display panel. "Supply and Requisition. What do you want?" he asked.

"This is Sentinel Lim, second commander of Lady Gaz's Black Sheep guard. Where have you hidden my gear? I should have had a full equipment bay right now, yet I have an empty deck. We should have received it immediately when my unit was first activated! So I am looking for someone to blame. And I have found you."

Quartermaster Toob sat up straighter and looked through his records. Getting on the bad side of a Governor's Own unit was not a bright nor healthy move. "I am sorry. I have no records of-"

Lim cut him off. "I am sending you a revised list now. My unit has just been given a priority mission direct from my Governor, and she will be most displeased to find that we do not even have spare changes of uniforms do to your section's incompetence."

Toob reviewed the list. It was a big list. "Sentinel Lim, I only have some of this on hand, and it is on reserve for-"

"Excuse me?" Lim cut in once more. "Let me put this another way. I do not care how you do it. You will get _all _these items, ready for lift at the spaceport in six hours. Or do I have to notify the Tallest that the Governors that they _hand-picked _for this assignment have no protection due a Governor because _you_ are lazy and stupid? Is that what you want me to do?"

"N-No! Of course not! It will be taken care of right away!"

* * *

Lim smiled and leaned back as she cut the connection. She had been unnaturally close to the video pickup while sitting on a container placed in her chair. As a smallest, she found she rather enjoyed putting these larger supervisors and managers in a small place. Anyway, it was all for a good cause.

Six hours later four light assault shuttles would lift off for the _Doomwind._ On board were the other smallests the original thirty had contacted about a new 'career opportunity.' The _Doomwind_, being an old ship, required a much larger crew than any Irken vessel of the same size. Six hundred total for full combat ability, damage control, environmental control, but mostly for strike craft support. For a shuttle cruise, this group of one hundred would be sufficient for the ship and the new base once they arrived.

Following them would be the three cargo shuttles loaded with powered and standard body armor, light and heavy infantry weapons, power cells, ordinance, scanners and everything else needed for a pair of Governors to give someone who annoyed them a very bad day.

* * *

Dib sat in Tak's gift wrapped ship looking at his sister's image in his wristwatch. It was almost 11pm. "Gaz, this can't possibly work. This won't fool anyone."

Gaz's image spoke back. The background was of her own room back at the Membrane house. "It doesn't have to. It's called plausible deniability. Beed has everything set up on his end. You have all you need? The notebook with the code phrases?"

He patted his pockets. "Yes, I have it. I checked everything twice before loading it all in the hatch. Clothes, food, water, the sedative patch. Basic items plus the inflatable pool. The navigation support program checks out. All systems are green and standing by." He didn't mention the video camera he had in his carryon under his feet.

"Okay we're finished on the outside. Dib, you can be back in two days if you decide. It will be a bit cramped in there."

"I know, Gaz. I can also stretch what supplies I brought for quite awhile if it proves necessary. I'll check in regularly. So what are you going to do while I'm away?" he asked.

"I'd like to just take time out to settle." Gaz replied. "Maybe go see a movie with Zim. Just kind of have some quiet time to learn how to really be together. You know, without the whole universe intruding every five minutes?"

"I understand," Dib answered. "Go get some sleep. I know you haven't been able to get much lately."

"I will." Gaz said. "Dib. You know you've always wanted to do something like this."

She smiled at him. "Now go save the girl."

Dib cut the connection and strapped into the pilot's chair.


	18. Chapter 17

A/N: This chapter's _**rating is a T**_ for lots of muck, mentions of human and alien bodily hygiene and waste functions in a cramped spacecraft (I never saw a bathroom on any Irken ship, and nobody can hold it for days of travel), and some close quarters decontamination. Tak's confession to Dib toward the end brushes on some dark edges. I won't be too descriptive, but I feel I am taking a risk here. So please be kind when you review. No flamers please.

Dib is OOC due to the fact that writing a good Dib character is beyond me. I'd appreciate it if perhaps after I've finished this story someone could help rewrite this chapter so that it could be what it should be.

There was an actual point to the muck other than being gross because Irkens seem to have a _major_ thing about being clean, but I've kept the muck as neutral as possible. Just don't think about it and you'll be fine. Tak is probably very OOC to reflect what she's been through. Zim may have been in his own prison, but Tak has been in her own reeducation camp. It was much, much worse. Even downright traumatizing for an Irken. A human could possibly adapt and cope with the conditions in this chapter, but it would still be damaging. Skoodge would have shrugged it off. But an Irken as proud and as elite as Tak? (We want her on the 'good' side right? This is the price.) You might want a tissue.

Thanks to the last reviewers: MojaveRuler151, Kazehana23, Zerg170, EduTorresD, Catgirfireflare and memmek10k. Thanks to EduTorres for pointing out some errors I let slip through, as my most productive state is sleep deprivation. Don't ask me why.

* * *

Logistic Specialist Roz flew her Fast Courier Ship through the atmosphere down toward the surface of the world below her. The hold was empty, and she had been heading back to Irk when the call to change course for a high priority run came in. Then she got a call from Beed.

She hadn't seen or heard from him since he and Lim were suspended, but hadn't questioned the disappearance. They just worked at the same logistic center after all. He had said he needed a favor on this particular run. Or rather his Lady did.

To say that Roz was shocked to learn that the Beed was now one of a Governor's Own was an understatement. To hear that he was currently leading the unit nearly blew a few neurons.

When Beed asked if she wanted to be included in an operation, and relayed his instructions, which mostly comprised of being a lot less observant than she was, he also made her an offer which sealed the deal. Lady Gaz would specially request Roz to fly all courier runs to and from Earth.

The truth was that Roz was one of the few smallests who actually liked her job. Most of the time it was boring, making short trips here and there delivering packages. But for the long distance super-express runs she got to use the wormhole drive. Only Fast Courier Ships had them. They used up so much power even in standby mode that ships equipped with them could not mount any weapons or defenses. The wormholes opened were also very small, so anything larger than a delivery ship couldn't use them. Totally useless to most Irkens. And most Irkens did not like flying through a wormhole.

Had Roz been human, she would have been labeled a roller-coaster junkie. And the wormhole drive was the fastest roller-coaster in the universe. So the offer of being the sole courier assigned to a planet so far away and remote that even people in the farthest reaches of space never heard of it was intriguing to say the least. She'd almost sell her own PAK for such an assignment. Almost.

She landed her ship at the specified coordinates in the darkness on an empty city street. Empty except for a very large package wrapped in decorative paper and a large bow tied around it sitting at the curb. It's shape was not much of a disguise by any stretch of the imagination. In fact it was down right obvious.

Roz pulled out the tow cable from the rear of her ship and attached the clamp to the front of the 'package.' Sometimes packages were too large to fit inside and had to be towed.

However, Fast Courier Ships were assigned _only _for very high priority packages or packages for high priority people. Tow ships, the slowest in existence except for the Voot Cruiser, were for hauling wrecks and broken down ships back to bases. Those were categorized as the lowest priority jobs. Courier pilots were supposed to turn these sort of 'requests' down cold and report the attempted abuse. So Roz hooked up the 'package' to the rear of her ship, thumped twice on the rounded front of said 'package,' and climbed back into her own ship.

Roz powered up and carefully rose up into the sky. Once out of Earth's atmosphere and past lunar orbit where gravity was much weaker, Roz pulled a lever and activated the wormhole drive. This trip would be flown with a very large counterweight strung behind her ship.

_ This is going to be epic!_ thought Roz.

* * *

Dib, stuck in a mostly unpowered ship completely covered in wrapping paper, including the canopy, and being towed through a wormhole by a thrill seeker delivery pilot did not think it so. In fact he felt the worst case of car sickness ever. But he kept telling himself to be thankful. While Tak's ship was the fastest ship flying across space, a wormhole drive vessel could tunnel _through_ space, saving months of travel time. Months he did not have to spend. He was just sorry the canopy was covered so he couldn't record the trip on his camera. And sorry for the nausea as well.

A while after the twisting and turning stopped and Dib's nausea finally quieted down, his communications system squawked to life. This part of the plan for sneaking into Dirt's atmosphere was Zim's contribution. Dirt may have been a garbage dump planet, but there was still Irken technology down there, even if it was trash. "Logistic Specialist Roz on approach vector two-seven. Here to make an orbital drop."

"Logistic Specialist? This is Dirt Orbital Control. We don't see many Courier Ships out this way to drop something."

"No kidding. I'm already past my shift and some Taller wanted this piece of art dropped, and I quote 'where the suns do not shine.' Apparently it's from Blorch."

"Blorch art? No wonder he called a courier in to get rid of the thing. I've heard you can go blind just by _thinking_ of looking at it. We've got just the place. Grid one-seven by four-zero."

"Understood."

Dib waited blindly as the minutes passed. Then he both heard and felt the tow cable detach from his ship. On cue he pressed a button on his communications panel when he heard the next transmission. "Orbital Control. I'm reporting a release malfunction. Tow cable snapped. Projected impact is grid nine-five by zero-six."

Dib cursed Zim as he read the Earth translation of the piggyback transmission. But he had to admit it was pretty clever for Zim. Anyone who picked up on the hidden signal and reading it down in the control facility would not question a private joke aimed as some poor janitorial drone. Only someone who knew them could interpret what it really meant. Of course that did not mean he was laughing either.

"That is bordering the sewage zone, but I don't see that as a problem. It's not like anyone is going to ask us to return Blorch art. You are clear to depart."

"Great. Hope I never smell this place ever again."

"Ha ha, like we've never heard that one before."

* * *

A beeping caught Tak's attention as she stared out of her pod as she often did. At first she just thought she was just hearing things again. Sometimes creaks and pops of the pod's hull as it heated up during her local day could sound like the beeps of instruments when one needed it to be bad enough. Then she realized it _was_ a beeping, from what remained of the communications system. She looked at the display. It was flashing a text message. It was in Irken script.

_ Dib stinks. He will stink more in five minutes. Go outside and you can probably smell him._

Tak left her respirator on the floor of the pod, opened the hatch and looked up into the sky.

* * *

The wrapping paper surrounding the ship disintegrated as it hit Dirt's atmosphere and Dib at last had a view outside. Gun cameras were now rolling, documenting an alien world. It was mostly a fiery view right now as Dib powered up the navigation support systems and warmed up propulsion to minimum power. Ionized plasma from the reentry would confuse any readings picked up from the standby level energy signature of Tak's ship. The craft stabilized as Dib followed directional instructions indicated by icons as his Heads-Up-Display lit up on the canopy while the ship dropped in freefall.

Unfortunately Dib had forgotten one small thing. Cargo space was a premium, and water was both heavy and bulky. So why not store as much as possible inside himself? A logical solution. So Dib had drunk as much water as he could before he was sealed inside the ship. He had neglected to consider the side effect of that.

So now Dib was dancing the crossed legs dance in his seat as his altitude dropped. At twenty thousand feet the main engines kicked on and the ship sped quickly to the coordinates provided. Dib, being Dib, had secretly hoped to make a dramatic entrance. Well, it probably would be dramatic, but not the way he had intended.

* * *

Tak heard the soft whine of an engine and looked toward the sound. As first she saw nothing, then a speck. Then it began to grow. Tears ran down her face. Someone was coming for her! Then there was recognition. She knew that ship! The rear central spike-shaped nacelle had been removed to install a shallow cargo pod, but it was definitely the same ship. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever witnessed as Tak's ship, not bearing a single mark to indicate the damage it had taken over Earth, came down out of the dull sky and hovered inches above the muck thirty yards away its creator.

_ But my ship had been destroyed over Earth! _Tak thought to herself. _It can't be real! I must be hallucinating after all this time._

Then the rear hatch of the cargo pod popped open and a mostly familiar figure from her past in a black trench coat swung out holding onto the hatch door and one foot on the hatch's ledge, most of his body leaning way out into midair. Then, back turned, he promptly relieved himself into the muck as quickly as he could.

Tak ran back into her pod. Clearly her mind had finally cracked.

* * *

As he choked on the stench and tried to make himself presentable again after nearly wetting his pants, Dib heard the footsteps splattering away and turned his head to see a brief glimpse of movement disappear into an encrusted, broken down and much dented pod.

Dib muttered about the timing of his bladder as he pulled himself back into the rear hatch and tied plastic garbage bags around his shoes and legs, and flung his black trench coat up and over the crowded cargo space, lamenting about forgetting to bring a gas mask. He didn't think he'd ever forget that smell. Like it was imprinted directly into his brain. And Tak had been here for seven years!

He slowly trudged toward the pod, holding the edge of his shirt up to his nose in a vain effort to block the smell. He, being raised in a city, tried not to think about what he was walking in. Dib mildly called Tak's name as he approached. He only heard mumbling. The human reached out to the edge of the open canopy and looked inside.

The holographic human disguise he was familiar with had been broken long ago. An Irken form was nearly laying on her side in her chair that took up most of the space inside. But there was no mistaking the person Dib had once known and shared laughs at Zim with so long ago. Filthy, trembling, her uniform long ago taken a threadbare and horrifically smudged look. It was difficult to tell what color that uniform had originally been. The inside of the pod almost looked like it had been abandoned for decades. "Tak?" Dib quietly called into the pod.

"Go away! Your not real!" Tak yelled, staring into a corner.

"Oh, Tak. What have they done to you?" Dib whispered to the broken soul before him. He stayed for a moment. It appeared that he would need to sedate her at least a little, but the square patch in his pocket that Zim had given him was to be directly applied to the skin. Tak was filthy, and who knew what would be absorbed? Not that it probably made much difference at this point, but Dib didn't want to take any more chances.

Dib put his knees up on the ledge leading into the pod and leaned his body in carefully. Red Irken eyes had always haunted his thoughts of alien invasion, but these eyes were purple. The human reached in and, slowly so as not to startle, cupped the dirty Irken face before him. "I came, Tak. I'm here. I'm real. It will be okay now."

Those solid purple eyes flicked in his direction, wary of trusting the too real vision. "Tak. I want to give you something that will help calm you, but I have to clean a spot first." He fingered one of the sealed moist toilettes in his pocket. He pulled it out and opened it. "This is all I have in here. It's a bit wet, so it will burn your skin a little. I'll do what I can to minimize it."

There was barest nod of the head, and eyelids closed. Dib dabbed a small spot on her neck below the jaw line, wiping the moisture away with a torn of piece of his shirt with each swipe. It took time, but a cleaner, if rather irritated, spot was showing. Dib took a corner off of the sedative patch in his pocket and placed it on her neck. It didn't appear that knocking her completely out would be necessary.

"Okay, Tak. You just rest easy for a few minutes. I have to go back to the ship and get things set up. I'm not leaving you. I'll be right back."

Dib left the Irken form in the pod and walked back to the ship. He pulled out the inflatable wading pool and began to blow it up. It took awhile using only his own queasy exhalations, but eventually it was done. He put it directly below the rear hatch of the ship. Dib went back for Tak.

He found her staring back at the open canopy of her pod, waiting for him to reappear. As if apprehensive that he had vanished like a mirage. "I've got things setup out there," he told her.

Dib reached over her, pulled Mimi down and placed the robot in her arms. Then helped the Irken girl out of the pod. He noticed that she wasn't wearing gloves. Those had worn away long ago and her hands were caked with grime. She hadn't grown much, and he stood an entire foot taller than she did. When he saw her limping Dib picked her up, carried her down and placed her carefully in the wading pool, getting his own clothes dirty in the process. He removed her boots and flung them away. Dib then took Mimi and placed the SIR unit in a garbage bag, sealed it carefully and placed it inside the ship's cargo space. Then he hauled out five-gallon containers of cleansing gel and began pouring it into the pool.

As more cleansing gel was poured over her shoulders, back and legs, Tak finally spoke up. "Dib? Is this really happening?"

"Yes, Tak. We're getting you out of here," the human said as he sloshed cleansing gel up over her scalp and rubbed with a clean washcloth.

"Tak. Um, your uniform. Its, uh… I have a set of clothes in the ship for you, but I need to get you cleaned up."

The Irken girl merely nodded. "I was going to die here, to be forever buried in… in… as if they thought I was…sewage too," was all she said, so very quietly.

Dib hesitated for a long while. It became obvious that Tak was no longer functioning enough to do much. Apparently she had been enduring this environment and her own thoughts for so long, it became all she had. Now that the end was near, she could only shut down so her broken soul could find some much needed rest in the care being attended her. Dib set his own mind to detach from what was happening and carefully, with utmost human decency, removed the remains of the once proud uniform and peeled away the partial sedative patch on her neck.

He winced as he saw the evidence of past and recent sores and skin infections. Irkens healed fast, but in this environment and poor nutrition it couldn't keep up. Dib poured more cleansing gel into the washcloth and began wiping Tak's face, neck, head and very gently her antennae, pausing when she began another coughing fit. He rubbed cloth and gel down her back and thin legs. He scrubbed her PAK until it shined, but he would need dental tools to get around the access ports. Those were jammed shut. His voice nearly broke when he saw her deformed toes from breaks that healed incorrectly, the swollen knee. Dib worked more gel deep into her bare hands and feet. He began to tear up as he cleaned her clearly seen ribcage and sunken abdomen. He afforded her with every speck of dignity and decency he could muster within himself as he cleaned and wiped and poured. Dib had brought thirty gallons of cleansing gel, nearly Zim's entire supply. It took up close to a third of the hold space in the ship. He wouldn't stop until he used all of it.

Tak's purple eyes watched him through all of this. The gel on her face was covering the tears as this human tenderly and intimately bathed her from antennae to toe.

Once she had seen this dirt species as lower than her own. But she now knew what filth in reality was in a way that was permanently scarred into her mind. As she was washed, her antennae covered in gel, Tak for the first time in seven years no longer smelled the stench around her. She could only smell a cleanliness her ill-treated mind now associated with human.

Even in her current state, Tak could feel herself changing within.

Dib helped the Irken girl up on her feet and wiped the residue off with a towel. He sat her on the ledge of the rear hatch of the ship and helped her get in her new white sweatpants. Dib had to cut and tear a hole with a pocket knife for her PAK in the matching sweater before it too could be worn.

As Tak sat in the rear compartment, Dib examined himself. His own clothes were soiled now too. He sighed. As the Irken watched, the nervous human stripped down to his underwear as he stood in the pool, left his soiled clothes on the ground, and wiped himself down with the moist toilettes that had been in his pockets. When he had finished he slid past Tak in the crowded hatch, opened a blue duffel bag and changed into new clothes within the congested entrance next to her. Then the human shut the hatch with them jammed inside.

Dib crawled over water jugs and bottles, bags of trail mix, clothes and other necessities and backed into the access port to the cockpit, grabbing a couple of bottles on the way. He took a bare Irken hand and helped her climb over the top of the piled cargo and into the small cockpit as well. He asked Tak to close the small access port behind them. She was able to manage that much. The cockpit was a tight fit for one, let alone two. Dib sat in the pilot's chair and Tak planted herself sideways in his lap. He unscrewed the cap off of one of the bottles and handed it to her.

It was a plastic container of honey. Tak began to guzzle it down as fast as she could.

Dib pulled it back. "Easy! Easy! Tak, take small sips so your system can adjust. If your body goes into shock I can't do anything about it here. We have time, Tak. Plenty of time. It will be okay. I promise."

He released his grip on the honey bottle as Tak slowed down her intake of the nourishing thick liquid.

As Tak fed, she looked around the familiar ship. Very little had changed. Some instrument panels that had been damaged had been replaced, some switches and knobs added. But it was her ship. The one she had designed and built with her own hands right here on Dirt so long ago.

The purple eyed Irken put the bottle down for a bit, and wrapped her arms around Dib's neck and buried her face into his shoulder. Tears of relief and a host of other things ran down her cheeks and into his shirt as he held her in return. Even her antenna wrapped around his hairy scalp and took in his scent as she clung to her clean human. She finally allowed herself to accept that it was indeed real. That her ship, her home had come for her. That she was at last home.

"You came for me," she finally said.

"I had to, Tak. I just had to." Dib whispered quietly. "I wouldn't be able to rest knowing you were like this. Now, let's get you out of here."

Tak knew she was in very bad shape physically, mentally and emotionally. In fact she was a rock bottom wreck of an Irken. But no one would do what Dib had done for her. And not just the part about giving her a lift off of the planet either. She had only heard about these sort of actions one could do for another. It barely existed in her own culture. Now she knew from her own experience its wonder. So she opened up to her rapidly changing instincts.

She held her honey bottle close as Dib reached back and strapped the two of them into the chair. Her ship leapt into the air under the human's control and, engines whining, streaked out of the atmosphere as Gaz's part of the plan went into effect.

As the dull sky faded to the blackness of space, Dib leaned forward and Tak adjusted her obscenely light weight so he could reach the notebook sitting on the instrument panel. Sensor indicators bleeped a warning of pursuit as they raced away.

Dib corrected his course, guided by the navigation support program, and pressed a few buttons on the communications panel. He began broadcasting, reading appropriate phrases Gaz had written in the notebook.

"Mother Goose, Mother Goose. Elvis has left the building. The King lives. Family of sleepy fangirls wants an autograph." _Dib calling Doomwind._ _Successful departure with Tak onboard. Tak's medical condition is stable. Pursuit of four to six space superiority craft but trailing behind._

A voice responded after a few long seconds. "Jack and Jill, Jack and Jill. Go down the beanstalk. The blind mice are running. Humpty Dumpty is on the wall." _Doomwind acknowledges Dib has Tak. Proceed at maximum speed to Irk system. Escort ships are on the way. Medical support standing by on your arrival._

* * *

Lim had been sitting at the controls of her Spittle Runner inside one of the _Doomwind's_ individual spacecraft bays for three hours. She was wearing her new light body armor inside the cockpit. Then the lights in the bay suddenly changed color to blue and the final flight plan came in. Lim powered up her Spittle Runner, and the armored space doors slid open to reveal the stars. A row of five lights near the outer doors flashed downward, then all five lit up at once.

The Irken smallest rammed the throttle to full military power. Ten Spittle Runners catapulted out of their bays in sequence as they executed their first combat launches. They sharply turned to a new course, surging away from the larger vessel as their transponders squawked an Irken Intercept ID code. Or roughly translated: _Get out of the way or get run over._

Lim laughed as she piloted her ship. _Oh my new job is AWESOME!_ she thought.

* * *

They were nearly twenty-eight hours into their flight with another thirty minutes until they were supposed to meet their escort. It was an interesting flight to say the least. And it wasn't due to the five Irken craft trailing them. They would never catch up, and the distance was increasing quickly with each hour. It was due more to the fact of being unable to open the access portal at the rear of the cockpit. The cargo pod was a last minute modification to the ship, and the aft portal turned out to be normally locked down for safety during flight since behind it was usually another nacelle filled with technology dealing with very high and dangerous energy states. It was designed to be opened only for repair work, not clambering around the ship.

Which meant that there was absolutely no privacy. It was surprisingly welcome at first, and was so for most of the trip. Such as when Dib was napping with a rescued Tak curled up with him in the chair. When he talked about old stories of Zim's foiled plots and schemes. The repair work Dib tried to do to the ship. He only briefly mentioned that Gaz had to finish fixing it for him.

It could be a little strange when Dib had to clean himself. Humans sweated water, shed skin cells, and collected oils and other natural grime. So Tak would have to scoot over to one side of the chair as Dib stripped his shirt to clean his upper body, put it back on, then do the same with his pants to clean his legs and feet as his face turned deep red. She tried to give him his needed privacy, but it fascinated her to see him not be burned by the moisture. In fact it made his skin shine.

Much worse was later when Dib had to answer Nature's call. The bio-recycling unit was not designed for human use. Another one of those things that somebody neglected to think of. Actually Gaz was probably laughing herself sick about it by now.

They had maneuvered around as best they could so Dib could turn his back while sort of crouching on his half of the seat with an empty water bottle. It was extremely embarrassing the first time. Dib kept apologizing until Tak told him to stop it.

Then they discovered that Tak had to go. Only Irkens did not pass water like humans did. More of a pink goo. Fortunately she _could_ use the bio-recycler. If she could get to it, that is. That led to interesting gymnastic maneuverings within that cockpit.

The strange thing was after the first twelve hours had passed, Tak was getting very used to all this. She kept telling Dib that it was okay whenever he apologized.

She returned to her curled position with Dib in the chair a bit cross. "Dib, stop saying 'I'm sorry.' I am getting tired of hearing you say that. I am okay with all of this."

"You are?" Dib asked.

"Look at me, human," Tak requested.

The human looked down into her purple Irken eyes. Antennae reached forward and nestled into his bangs as she cupped his jaw. "Dib, you do not bother me. Our closeness does not. It is strangely comforting to me, even though it shouldn't. It should upset me greatly. Maybe because I was alone and could only smell overpowering filth for so long. Maybe because I am unwell by any Irken standard. Dib, you have seen me. You have washed me. Every part of me. You helped dress me. You are just trying to stay sanitary now. So stop apologizing. It is no longer necessary between us, not for me."

Tak put her head into his shoulder. "Dib, they did not send me enough food. I had to hunt… things that crawled in the filth. There was nothing clean. I had to eat their dirty meat. It burned so much. I vomited more often than not. Things I've had to do… Dib. This here, now, is a paradise for me. Do not apologize for necessary things. Nothing of me has been hidden from your sight. Do not feel you must hide yourself to shield me in these confines. It is no longer necessary. Not between us. I sense something changing. I don't know what, but it is not a bad thing. Not to me."

Dib did not know what to say to this. Trying to eat meat explained her emaciated appearance, the cracked and blistered lips and raspy voice, how she could hardly force herself to eat anything solid that Dib had brought, and a host of other things. Because Tak looked in really bad shape. He had no idea how her mind had been affected, but knew there was no danger here. Not from her. He'd just have to play it by ear and follow Tak's lead.

Like not pushing her on trying to eat solid food rather than feeding from the honey bottle. She had been conditioned into anxiety about solid food. But really Tak's body knew what it needed. Dib would listen as well. There was only a little more than a full day more to this flight. Then Tak would be able to get the medical care she needed.

And after being jammed in a cockpit like this with the alien girl he had rescued for over a full Earth day, Dib was himself at ease with her presence also.

A voice was heard over the speakers. "Attention Dirt pursuit craft. This is Dark Wool Two. We have you on our sensors. You are ordered to break off and return to base. This has been an unscheduled exercise to test your security readiness. We have found it to be pathetic. You will have one month to rectify your amazing display of uselessness before a formal report is made to the Sector Governor. The vessel you are pursuing is now under our control and will be escorted back to Irk."

"Dib? Who are they? Back to Irk? They'll send me back to that cesspool!" Tak began to tremble in her traumatized phobic response. Her irrational mind could not bear the thought of going back to that horrible place and she was too weak to resist. "Don't let them take me back. Please, Dib. Please kill me first."

Dib's large heart broke for the fractured soul in his arms. The human held on tight to the Irken, rocking back and forth. "Do not fret, Tak. You are safe now. It's all part of the plan. Those are my sister's personal guards coming for us. She sent them to guide us back to her ship. No one else knows you're here. Her ship is orbiting Irk for supplies. You're safe, Tak. You're safe."

Tak could hardly believe it. "Your sister has a ship? Irkens obey a human's orders? I don't understand."

"Neither do I, but Gaz has some influence going on right now. I was there when she called her ship to ask about a rescue mission for you. Tak, they were willing to conduct orbital strikes on every installation on the planet if Gaz gave them the go ahead."

Tak didn't know what to think. Right now she felt like she didn't want to.

* * *

With the escort ships behind it, Tak's ship flew across the Irk planetary system. Dib's video camera kept running, taking in the view. The planet Irk was surrounded by a pink atmosphere and rings much like Saturn. Ships for every mundane task were everywhere. Then he saw the armada.

It was huge. So many formations stretching as far as the eye could see. Swarms of Spittle Runner interceptors and the next-generation of space superiority craft that replaced them, the heavier but slower Shuvvers. There were formations of Ring Cutter attack craft and Ripper patrol corvettes. Viral Tank class cruisers dotted the traffic around Irk. Then there was the _Massive._ Dib's camera caught it all and Tak's ship gathered sensor readings.

As he took in the sight, Dib realized just what Zim had always meant when he bragged about the Armada and why he was so determined to bring it to Earth. It sunk in just how small his victories over Zim really were. _ I must have been insane to think a lone eleven year old boy could have stopped something like this,_ Dib thought. His hold on Tak tightened. Had they wanted it, Earth would have been theirs. One kid trying to stop something like this would have been like a mosquito standing in the path of dozens of speeding cement trucks. And this was just _part_ of their space fleet!

It also emphasized just how unsupported and alone Zim had been the whole time. It made very real the meaning of Zim's being banished to Earth with a fake mission.

The two of them traveled on in silence until they approached the third moon and a very different style of ship slowly grew into a long and slender form. "Is that it?" Tak asked.

Dib nodded, keeping the camera steady. The long shape continued to grow. He hadn't really comprehended when Gaz said she had bought a ship. She no doubt didn't either. This was no rusted out, on its last legs, defenseless freighter conversion. It felt unreal the power his sister now had at her disposal should she choose to wield it. What grew before them was a well preserved, purpose-built warship pretending to be a transport.

They were approaching what appeared to be a spaceship version of a wet-navy supercarrier. His sister _bought_ herself an operational, honest-to-god, full-blooded _spacecraft carrier._ It was _huge!_

A voice over the communications system brought him back to unreal reality. "Jack and Jill, this is Mother Goose. Landing bay is clear. Follow Dark Wool Two. She will guide you through the approach pattern. Bring it in slow and easy."

Dib sent an acknowledgement. "Jack and Jill copies."

Dib video taped several bay doors in the side of the large vessel open up and most of their escort begin to slowly back inside. One ship banked to the right and flew far past the end of the ship. Tak's ship followed. The Spittle Runner ahead of them lined up on the hollow landing deck running down the center of the ship. He set aside the video camera. The gun cameras would capture the rest of the flight. As the two small craft entered the hollow space filled with red light, Dark Wool Two slowed down to a hover and made contact with the deck. Dib followed suit, only more clumsy. He returned to his video camera as Tak continued to watch.

One of the large doors on the inner sides of the chamber opened and tractor field emitters activated, pulling the two ships inside an airlock. The outer doors closed, atmosphere blasted in, and a set of lighter inner doors opened. Another tractor beam in the far chamber pulled the two ships into the large maintenance bay. With a bump Tak's ship came to a stop.

"Jack and Jill, Mother Goose. Bay is secure. Queen of Hearts says to, and I quote, 'stop taking stupid pictures and see to Jill.'"

Dib turned off the video camera, and let his hands ran over the instruments. The main systems of Tak's ship powered down. "Mother Goose, ship is secure. Jack and Jill signing off."

Tak's ship finished powering down, and the canopy raised up, letting in fresh air. Well, that is to say fresher recycled air. Dib unlatched the straps to their seat as very short Irken figures entered the chamber. Most of the Irkens walking toward them had ruby eyes, but there were also lighter red, pink, a few light purple and even one blue set of eyes. One figure in a bio-hazard suit began unloading the bottles and wrappers in the cockpit for disposal while several more suited figures began loading a power cart with gallon jugs of water and the rest of Dib's necessities from the rear hatch. Others began spraying the hull with liquid and vacuuming it back up off of the deck.

Two of the Irkens were in body armor with sidearms holstered. The Spittle Runner next to Tak's ship opened it's cockpit and another small Irken jumped out, also in body armor. She ran over to them.

"You are Dib and Tak? I am Sentinel Lim, second commander of Lady Gaz's Black Sheep guard." The Irken tossed out a salute to the pair. "Welcome aboard the flagship _Doomwind._ Tak is now officially under the protection of this vessel and the Black Sheep. No one has realized she is missing, and we will not advertise she is aboard. We will get you to the medical bay and private quarters as soon as you and your belongings have gone through decontamination. We have it set up over there." She pointed to a portable washing station that was being rolled in their direction. "You have been provided escorts while on board. They will guide you wherever you need to go, but your movements will be restricted. We will be loading heavy cargo modules on board over the next week, and cramming as much as we can in any spare space we can find. Lady Gaz would be most unpleasant if either of you were run over by an automated grav lift."

* * *

Dib stepped out of the decontamination shower dripping wet, his latest change of clothes clinging to him. Well, at least he was the cleanest he had ever felt in his life. Being surrounded by all these Irkens made him really nervous, but it helped to think of them as Gaz's Irkens rather than just Irken. Sort of like a relative's pet wolf verses one in the wild looking for dinner. He could hear the continued spray in the next shower that Tak was using.

"Dib?" A blue eyed Irken, with very curly antennae and wearing body armor stepped up to him. "I am Yat. I was assigned to be your escort. Your packaged supplies have been through decontamination and moved to your quarters. I can take you there whenever you are ready."

Tak's head appeared past the curtains of her shower dripping wet from the spraying solution. She was glaring at Yat. "You stay away from him or I will crush you!" she hissed like a viper. "I will tear your fingers off one by one and make you eat them! I will scoop out your-"

The escorts began to finger stun grenades at their belts. But mostly they were shocked and backed away.

"Tak!" Dib interrupted, also shocked by the sudden outburst. "What are you doing? They're here to help!"

Tak tossed her arm over the curtain as well, exposing a bare shoulder and pointing at the other escort. "_He_ can show you to your quarters. I won't let _her _near you. I won't allow it!"

Dib went up to Tak. He had to reach down and pulled her death glare away from Yat and up to his own face. They really didn't need an incident. "Tak, what difference does it make?" He forced himself to ask in a soft voice hoping it would calm her down. It seemed to work. "They're just doing their job." He took her bare hand and brought it down so she wasn't pointing anymore. "I don't think they'll hurt anybody."

She looked back up at Dib. "I... I don't know. I just know I don't want _her_ following you around. I don't know why. Maybe I'm just being irrational. I know I am unwell." She sent her antennae forward into his damp hair, taking in the scent of squeaky clean human. Seeking the smell that her mind found reassuring.

"Okay, Tak. Why don't you finish in there, and I'll help you walk down to the medical bay. I know your foot gives you trouble." he suggested. _It's weird that she keeps probing my hair with her antennae. But then she's spent all that time down there. I was there for only an hour and my brain can still imagine the smell. Of course I'd probably be stuffing my nose in the closest bag of potpourri I could find if I were her, and my hair is probably the closest thing to it on this ship with all the decon it's been through._

Blue eyed Yat watched this, and took a few steps away and popped a communicator out of her PAK. "Sentinel Lim? Request permission to trade places with Sentinel Flom here. Yes, I know we're both watching the visitors. He's right here standing next to me. But I think we have a problem with Tak."

* * *

Lim found them in the spacious medical bay. It had been renovated up to Irken standards very recently, and Tak was still lying on the exam table surrounded by technology with Dib and a technician standing nearby. The two escorts were standing outside the door as had been requested. Not an unusual thing for the medical bay. "Bio-technician Pean. How are things proceeding?" she asked.

The technician looked up. "We have already begun the initial treatment program. Some will have to wait until tomorrow as her PAK is still jammed. It will require very detailed cleaning that we could not accomplish with a decontamination spray. She has significant numbers of parasites in her system, and that is being dealt with now so she can breathe easier. There is severe malnourishment, damage to her upper digestive sections, and a large amount of muscle loss due to insufficient nutrients and the need to fight off infection. There are skin lesions remaining, but those were already tended to by the human. Also some sensitivity loss to her antennae. The toes will have to be fractured again at some point so that they have a chance to mend properly. We will do that under sedation during her next PAK maintenance cycle. When those bones have healed, the knee joint will fully recover once the strain of an unnatural walk has been removed. But that is just the physical aspects."

The technician continued in a much quieter voice, drawing the others away from the resting Irken on the table. "She has not received _any _PAK maintenance since arriving on Dirt. That's at least seven _years._ Tak will require extensive time plugged in to a PAK support unit. Possibly weeks. But with her needing nutrition and building her back up physically, that will have to be broken up daily. But until we can access her PAK, we won't know how much or to what extent she needs in that area. It is clear that Tak will be out of commission for a long time. Perhaps as long as a month or two. In the mean time I have collected sedatives to help her rest without a maintenance cycle, but we need to get her PAK cleaned and open soon."

"Very well," Lim said to the technician. "If you are finished, you may be excused." The bio-technician left the room. Lim looked at Tak. "I can show the human to his quarters if you want."

"No you won't!" Tak hissed again. There was fire in her purple eyes. "I'll burn-"

"Very well," the smaller Irken interrupted. "Dib, Sentinel Flom will escort you to your quarters now. I must begin debriefing Tak in private."

Dib nodded sleepily and left the two Irkens alone.

Lim pulled up a chair, but remained a safe distance from the Irken before her.

"You have threatened Governor's Own soldiers twice now in a short amount of time. This can not be allowed to continue."

Tak looked back up at the ceiling as she lay on the slightly angled table. She was still in her human sweater and sweatpants. Occasionally she would be lightly jabbed with something from a mechanical arm or some beam of light would shine into her body. There was a constant soft beeping of machines.

"I couldn't help it. I don't intend to, Sentinel Lim. I know I am not being rational, but-"

"I believe I understand, Tak." Lim told her. "You were both confined in a very small space for two days. I must ask some questions now and I suspect the answers will be difficult for you. But the safety of this ship and personnel require that we have this discussion."

Tak nodded her head.

"I have reviewed your record, and there is no need to discuss your assignment to Dirt." Lim went on. "It is not imaginable for me. This concerns another matter. First of all, we expected you to require much more decontamination. You also arrived without your uniform and in these human clothes. You were unsoiled."

Tak began. "The human brought a makeshift cleansing pool with him and clothing. My uniform was no longer a uniform, but waste I used to cover myself during my assignment. The soiled articles we were wearing at the time are still on Dirt."

"So you were able to cleanse yourself onsite?" Lim asked. "That was a reasonable plan."

"Not exactly."

"You will have to explain."

Tak took a breath. "When Dib came for me, I thought I was hallucinating. That I had lost my mind. I was no longer functional, to do things for myself. Dib had to clean me. He was the one who had to remove my uniform. He was the one who washed me for nearly an hour. He was the one who dressed me."

"You mean you were- He saw you-?" Lim couldn't finish the sentence.

The Irken lying on the table nodded.

Lim felt herself grow sick. Irkens did not do this. Not ever. They were always covered from the neck down except in very private cleaning. "That must have been a horrible experience," was all she could say.

"No, it wasn't. " Tal confessed. "I consented to his attention, was grateful for him cleaning me with his own hands. I was unable and needed to be clean. The human dressed me in new clothes that he brought with him. But he dirtied himself to wash me clean, so he had to do the same to himself."

Lim stopped her. "Okay, Tak. Now, did you feel something change when this happened? Something new?"

Tak nodded.

"So you questioned it I suppose? Dismissed these things? Denied it? Fought them?"

Tak shook her head. "No. I opened up to it. When we were in my ship leaving Dirt I embraced it. Wanted more. I don't know what it was. When my antennae probes his hair Dib smells clean. This reassures me. I need clean."

Lim shook herself. "Governor Zim and Lady Gaz sent us details of human biological necessities so we could make arrangements. It is all very disgusting. But you were in that ship for two days with him. There was no place for privacy. He had to- in _front of you._" Lim shivered inside herself.

Tak again nodded. "He was very embarrassed, and turned his back each time. But I reassured him that his doing so no longer bothered me. If it were anyone else I think I'd be hysterical, but him… his constant apologies were really getting on my nerves."

_Oh dear,_ thought Lim. _This is much worse than I thought._

"Tak. You're dependent, aren't you? On the human?" the smallest asked.

The purple eyed Irken on the table looked at her with a confused look. Lim went on. "You need to reassure yourself with the human's scent at times. Maybe even crave it if too much time passed. You go into a rage whenever another female goes to attend him. In your mind there is little or no difference in your bodily functions and his own, is there? That's why it didn't bother you in that tiny ship. You're whole system is tuned into his. If he planned to leave tomorrow without you, you would go into a panic or go berserk trying to go with him. Because your instincts are saying you can't be separated for long."

Tak just looked at her with wide eyes. _How does she know what is happening better than I?_ she thought.

Lim spoke on, answering the unspoken question. "My rightful Taller and Lady is human, and bonded to an Irken. We have researched this to some extent so we may take this into account in our duties. You show all the signs of having completed the bonding process. Tak, I'm sorry to inform you that you are now an unbound mate to a human."

Tak did not say anything for a long while. When she did speak it was in a quiet voice. "My PAK is no doubt damaged from neglect, and I deserted from an assignment _again_. My PAK's designation is a Dookie Manager. I can earn no monies, for no Irken will employ me. Non-Irken planets would only kill me on sight. There is no place for me. I am completely destitute, unable to even order a single snack. And now if I am away from the human too long I would sink into madness, wouldn't I? From being compelled to seek out his human scent if he was unavailable? I am going to be deactivated."

Lim let out a loud laugh. Tak looked at her with a puzzled look.

"Tak, girl you fit in right here. We _all_ should have been deactivated. None of us are what our PAKs say we are. I am compelled to obey orders from my _Human _Taller over any Irken one. But more importantly, I _want_ to."

She went on. "While they were planning your rescue, Beed asked Lady Gaz about our unit designation. She said that like her and others, we're misfits. The undesirables. Those seen as having less or no value in their society. That this is why we are called her Black Sheep. None of us fit in. We may not have the training, but we have smarts and a host of abilities from our previous occupations. We'll tear up _anybody _who speaks ill of our human Lady. I have to include Governor Zim too, but that's just part of the job for my Lady.

"Look at me, Tak," Lim said as she finished. "I'm just a smallest, supposed to be stuck with the lowest possible job they could dump me in, but I'm now the second commander of a Governor's own, a flagship and a spacecraft squadron. You, with your abilities and resourcefulness could do very well here and on Earth. In the mean time you need to take it easy so you can recover."

There was silence for a while before Tak spoke again. "I'm going to have to speak to Dib."

"Yes, and more than speak to him. Be patient with the human. You will have to explain what has happened to you, what you need from him. And not scare him."

"I know. I am not a smeet, just unwell," Tak said, a bit annoyed.

"Very well. I will change assignments so that none of the female crew are aimed at Dib," Lim informed her. "As for your status regarding the human, you have to deal with that and soon."

"I have no monies for the order," said Tak. She was nervous about that part. Humans were much more complicated than Irkens were in this matter.

"There was a discretionary fund opened up for _Doomwind's_ role in the operation to retrieve you. I think we can categorize this invisible drop as part of the operational expense," Lim told her. "In the meantime I'll put a four hour sedative patch on you so you can rest." Lim placed a blue patch on Tak's neck.

"Sentinel Lim?" Tak asked. "Once my PAK is open, will you allow the repair of my holographic disguise? There is only one pattern I want to use. It may help the human- I mean Dib- adjust. He does not respond to Irkens well."

"Most aliens don't." Lim agreed. "As for the holo-disguise, we shall need approval to repair such a device as well as the SIR Unit. That one may not be salvageable. However from what I've seen of the human, he may uneasy around the rest of us but he seems very at ease with you so far."

* * *

Dib awoke to the sound of a long, nonstop buzzing in his small quarters aboard the _Doomwind._ It seemed one of the bad things about staying on a ship full of aliens who only needed a few hours of sleep every two or three days was that they had absolutely _NO_ idea about a human's need for a good third of a day of blissful unconsciousness. Especially after two days of trying to sleep in a cramped spaceship with an alien girl on his lap.

The human groaned as the buzzing continued and he hauled himself out of the unstable hammock that threatened to deposit him on the floor. Dib put on his glasses and eventually opened the door to stare out into an empty hallway. Then his sleep-hungry brain remembered to look down.

Being around Irkens was unnerving, but fortunately _Doomwind_ was a big ship with a small crew in more ways than one. The tallest of these smallests only came up to his bellybutton. That they followed his sister (and Zim) helped with his unease. These people were different from maniacal Zim. Different than he had imagined and tried to research. They were still _Irken_, but not the utterly bloodthirsty monsters he had imagined. It was the Tallers and Tallest that were really the problem.

So Dib was only uncomfortable at the sight of the slightly familiar Flom at human gut height. Was gut height better or worse than neck height? Dib was too tired to decide if being struck in either spot with Irken claws was worse. But with all the 'training' his fights with maniac Zim had given him, Gaz's Irkens didn't look to be a major threat nor even hostile.

He ran a hand through his mussed hair. "Yes?" he asked his escort.

"Tak is asking for you in the medical bay. She requires your assistance with further decontamination."

Dib just acknowledged with half closed eyes and followed Flom down the corridor.

Flom brought a pajama wearing and barefoot Dib to the medical bay where Yat was standing guard outside. As Dib went inside Flom spoke to him. "We have been instructed to allow no one entry until you and Tak are finished. We will remain out here."

Dib stepped into the room and the door closed behind him. The portable decontamination showers had been moved back into a corner of the room. Tak was sitting on the examination table in her white sweatpants and sweater. A small box and a tray of little picks and other tools lay beside her.

"Dib, I am unable to reach my PAK, and the access ports must be attended to. It cannot wait, but they are jammed with contaminated material. This will have to be done in the decontamination shower."

"Can't the technician or someone help?" he asked yawning. It was a bit personal what she was asking considering it wasn't an emergency. Plus he had many bad experiences with getting to close to a PAK.

"No. I might- If someone else tried I might attack them. You are the only one here that would be safe," she tried to explain.

Dib sighed and opened the door leading out into the corridor. "Flom? Can you go bring my clothing bag down here please?" The door closed again and Dib went over to Tak to make an examination.

On the surface, her PAK was shiny again, but around all the crevices, the edges around the access ports and around where it attached into her back was a solid crust. Almost like glue after it had cured. This would not be easy.

A buzz brought Dib back to the door where he took his blue duffel bag. He rummaged through his duffel bag for more underwear as he didn't have many changes of clothes. At this rate he should have brought some swimming trunks.

Tak moved into the shower with the box and tools, and closed the curtain behind her. White garments were deposited outside on the floor. Dib once again stripped down to his underwear and handed a set through the curtain after calling for her attention. He was just glad she didn't have the upper girly parts to worry about covering. What had happened down on Dirt had been under emergency conditions. Dib was even less comfortable now, but there was a job to be done and apparently Tak would only allow him to work on her PAK.

He heard the solution spray turn on and begin to rain liquid inside. "Okay, Dib. I'm ready." Tak called out.

Dib poked his head inside the curtain. Tak was sitting on the floor of the shower wearing the set of his underwear he had offered for decency. Her back was toward him, giving Dib space to work on her PAK. The tools and box were tucked in the far corners. Blue solution rained down, soaking her and running down her green skin.

He took a breath and stepped inside, focused his mind on the job at hand and joined her on the floor. Dib instantly became soaked by the warm fluid raining down his own bare skin. She scooted forward, giving him more room in the small area, Dib took one of the picks from the tray and began digging at her PAK.

Dib distracted his mind with thoughts of all the alien technology around him, how he had gotten footage of alien planets, the Armada and even the _Massive._ He did not want to think about the mostly bare Irken girl before him. The girl who bore the ravages of her time on Dirt. Her misshapen toes and scars of past infections on her shoulders, arms, legs and back. The emaciated frame that showed too many bones and too little flesh. At least her blistered mouth and the fresher infections that had marked her skin had healed. He did not want to see her as he was everything else. He wanted to see her as a person, not from an investigator's or scientist's viewpoint. Well, maybe not _quite_ at this particular moment considering they were sitting in a decontamination shower together. Especially with her in this condition. She deserved better.

"Tak?" he called quietly as he worked. This was going to take forever. "How much of the solution is available?" he asked.

"The solution is recycled, filtered and reused almost immediately. It will not run out."

They sat there quietly for nearly an hour as Dib worked with small picks and tools to remove the crusted material from her PAK.

"Dib? Does it bother you that I'm Irken?" she suddenly asked.

The human wasn't sure how to answer. "I am nervous around most of them. Guess it bothers me knowing what Irkens do. It's hard not to see them as an enemy knowing what they can do to me, my family and my planet. But I guess I'm getting pretty used to your Irken form now. It's hard not to when we've been like this almost constantly these past few days."

There was silence again. So Dib spoke up some more. "When you first came to Earth, I liked you. You listened when I talked about my paranormal work, and we both liked seeing Zim make a fool of himself and get doomed. After that? I don't know. I guess I had a few years to get used to the idea. I never really held it against you now that I think about it."

A thick chunk of crust broke free with a loud crack and went down the drain. There were a few more cracks and scrapes.

"You have done much for me. You care for me even though I am Irken," Tak commented.

"Tak, seeing you like this hurt me. I had to do something," was all Dib said.

Tak turned enough so she could look at Dib behind her. "Dib, we need to discuss something. About what happened down there."

He continued his work, but eyed her expression quickly. "I know it was bad, but-"

"Dib, shut up."

The human stopped his work and looked at the Irken girl before him. She nodded for him to continue picking, which he did. "You know I am unwell. That I was in a much worse state down on the planet when you found me."

"I know, Tak."

"Dib, you bathed me when I couldn't. I was very vulnerable. I needed clean so much, I needed to smell clean rather than filth. And you were clean. I needed to embrace it. Dib, I started changing and I welcomed it." Tak turned around to sit facing Dib.

He looked in her face as blue rain poured down on them both and circled the drain between them. "Tak," Dib said as he put tiny tools down in the tray, "you needed care. Help. To crash and be picked up."

"Dib, you must understand. Irkens do not do what you did for me. When you washed me I started _bonding_," the Irken nearly cried out.

The human just stared at her for a moment. Sitting like this in a shower was not a comfortable place to talk about _bonding_ with a girl of any species. But as his fore-mind tried to catch up, the back of his mind wondered what would happen if he tried to _leave._

Tak continued looking at the drain between them, blue solution running down her green skin. "When you took me in our ship, I needed to take in the smell of clean so much. I needed to probe your hair with my antennae, needed the smell of clean human. I felt myself changing and welcomed it. I didn't know what it was, Dib."

The Irken paused before she spoke again. "I was very damaged, and this was not the natural process of an Irken. Few of us understand what happens. We are not educated about it at all. Dib, I didn't fight it. I didn't even try. I _embraced _the change."

Tak brought her hand to her lap. "Please do not run from me yet. I want you to understand."

Dib finally opened his mouth. "You mean, like what Zim and Gaz are in? That kind of bonding?" he asked in near shock.

Tak shook her head and looked at Dib. There was a tear in her eye. "I don't think so. I only saw a brief moment of them during the last broadcast to degrade Zim for Irken amusement. Theirs appears to be mutual. A more natural process. If you could call it that. Dib, something went wrong with me. I completed the process by the time we got to this ship. It's supposed to take months and years, not _hours."_

She went on before Dib could think of a response with his suddenly jelly-like brain. "I get jealous and threatened when female Irkens show you attention, even if it's just in doing their assignments. I feel the need to run my antennae over your face and hair as your scent reassures and stabilizes me. Even crave it if too much time passes. If I were to be separated for too long, I would eventually go mad trying to get back to you. But you, you don't Dib! Don't you understand? I'm dependent on you now. I can't ever break free or even want to. My system is now tuned to your scent, your bio-chemistry. I wasn't even bothered when you had to expel _waste_ on our ship! Dib, something in me recognizes you as my _mate. _But I know I am not yours."

Tak began to back up into a corner. "My mind is all backwards and twisted around. Much worse that they know. I'm not just unwell, Dib. I'm _sick._ They can't find out. They'll either take me away and deactivate me or save themselves the trouble and toss me out the airlock. Dib, I associate _humans_ with clean. _Irkens _are filthy. My own kind are dirty to me. Almost repulsive. I feel a need to get away from Irken kind. I _need _human." Tears began to flow freely as Tak's broken soul opened up to her mate.

Dib was shocked, stunned, and all manner of other things. But as he watched and listened, he came to understand why Gaz had done what she did. Her need to take care of Zim when he had broken down. And perhaps a little of why she was with him. For while Dib did not love Tak, he cared for her broken soul very much. Enough to rush to her rescue at the drop of a hat. Enough to trust Irkens he hadn't met yet on the word of his sister and lifelong enemy. To allow him to travel blindly through wormholes on a tow cable, outrun pursuit ships, and run clear to Irk of all places. To seek help on a ship full of his sister's Irken guard. To bathe alien waste off of her body with his own hands when all she was capable of was watching him with those solid purple eyes. To hold her when she trembled in trauma induced irrational fears, and let her run her Irken antennae through his hair when close- _oh crap._

It wasn't in the romantic form, but there was something there. Like some seed that had been planted long ago and remained dormant until he had seen her distress message. It compelled him to rush in headfirst like an idiot knight on horseback.

The human slid forward and around the Irken girl to hold her as the decontamination shower continued to run over them. He brought her close in comfort, Pak resting against his bare chest.

"Dib, they don't know. They can't find out. The sewage ship captains would try to hit me with their drops. I know they did. They hit my pod eighteen different times. Once I was inside and was almost buried alive in muck. The first three years I was so outraged I wanted get at them. To rip them up. I started seeing those captains as Crap People. Dib, I ate meat. I had to try. But as I was hunting for those things in the muck, I started to imagine them as those sewage captains. It was the only way I could hit back. Then one day I realized I had almost slipped into madness when I thought about one of those sewage ships finally crashing nearby where I could hunt them down and turn them into the crap I knew them to be."

Tak began openly crying at this point, and Dib shifted his body so that he could cocoon the girl as he tried to wrap his arms, legs and head around her. Antennae reached back and touched his face, ears and ran through his hair. Dib was tearing also.

The girl tried to keep going, but her voice was breaking. "Dib, I almost went over the edge. I saw, Dib. I almost saw myself feeding to convert them into crap out of revenge. I had to turn inward and die inside. To turn into an empty shell. I had to surrender, Dib. I had to accept my fate. That I was my people's latrine. That I would never leave that place. Then after so very, very long, you called. You came, Dib. You came for me. My human came for me."

After that Tak couldn't relate anymore, but it was enough. In fact it was too much. Too much for any one soul to bear.

Dib was weeping too, but also for different reasons. It wasn't the place that had broken Tak. It had nearly driven her into psychosis. To save her sanity, she had reached down inside herself with intent and broke her own soul.

He remembered on the flight away from Dirt when the Black Sheep ships warned off the pursuit from Dirt. Tak had nearly freaked, and was asking Dib to kill her before allowing her to be sent back. She hadn't been asking to be spared more of that horrid experience. She was begging him to save her from madness if that was the only way.

Dib now saw that not all Irkens were the same. He could not forsake this one. He knew that he had to help this girl. And he'd spend the rest of his life doing so if that's what it took. To help her come back from the brink, to rescue her when the haunted and cursed memories returned. To always bring her back home.

He reached up with his hand as they sat under the cleansing spray of the decontamination shower and began lightly rubbing Tak's green alien scalp and back over her antennae, murmuring reassurance. They stayed like that for almost an hour.

When they had sufficiently recovered, Dib went back to cleaning her PAK. It took a long time, but one by one the access ports were cleared and her PAK gleamed like new. He reached up and turned off the shower.

"Thank you," she said. Tak slowly turned around in the small space until once more she faced Dib. Her hand reached over to the forgotten box. Tak brought it over and into her lap where she opened it.

The Irken withdrew a thick looking and mostly familiar necklace. It was a different style and was made of a dark purple metallic weave.

"Dib, I know that you being my mate does not make me yours. But I have bonded completely. Please help me do this one thing," she asked, gesturing for Dib to hold the necklace.

He held it up with two hands and Tak let go of it. She scratched a minor cut on her palm with a clawed fingernail. Some dark blood oozed out. Not a lot, but enough. She touched her palm to the necklace's sphere and it changed color. Dib was still holding it as Tak brought her head forward. She paused, then brought her hands to meet Dib's and helped him bring the bonding necklace to her throat. It snapped into place around her neck and the clasps fused together.

Tak brought out the matching necklace from the box and put in in his hands. "Thank you, Dib. This one is yours. You can do whatever you want with it. Keep it in the box or throw it in a star. It's up to you."

Dib wasn't looking at it. He was looking at the one around Tak. There was a small smile on her face which was wet with tears. Happy that she was to be seen as bonded by others, if not accepted by her mate. It didn't look wrong, and actually matched her eyes.

"I can't do that," he said, putting the matching necklace in one of her hands.

He didn't watch her expression as three Irken fingers closed around it. Then he reached over to the other alien hand, and helped one of those fingers scratch a small cut in his own palm. Dib offered his hand to the girl before him as he brought his forehead down to hers.

"I'll adjust. Just be patient with your slower paced human. Okay, Tak? I'm just starting my own process here."

Hands reached up and Dib felt a weight settle, first in his palm, and then around his neck with a click and a smell of fused metal. He looked up into happy Irken eyes. Her mate had accepted their bond. Thin green arms reached out and embraced the human.

In the narrow space, Dib helped Tak out of the decontamination shower to change back into pajamas rather than just stained blue underwear. He led her back over to the examination table. She climbed on to it wearing her donned white sweatpants and sweater, and laid down on her side exposing her cleaned PAK. Access ports clicked open for the first time in so, so many years.

Dib opened the door to the medical bay and called in one of the escorts. "Flom? Could you please help Tak start her maintenance cycle? She's overdue for a long and good one."

Flom entered as Dib returned to Tak and took a position with her on the exam table facing her. As two cables snaked down and plugged into her PAK, Dib reached over and brushed the green Irken face with those solid purple eyes. Antennae reached over and combed through his hair.

Flom returned to his sentry post outside the room quietly. Dib placed his arm over his new bondmate and settled in closer. She looked happy being so close to her mate's clean smell.

Dib knew it had been stupid, even beyond stupid. That there were probably thousands of reasons why not. And he'd never hear the end of this from Gaz. But he had been hooked back when he saw her broken on Dirt. Tak was also biologically dependent on his own now. Forever. Dib just couldn't bear to turn her away. His heart would never allow it. If the paranormal was to be his career, why not his personal life too? Besides, he already had an Irken brother-in-law. May as well return the favor and give Zim a sister.

The two very weary bondmates drifted into a well deserved, much needed, and very clean slumber.

* * *

A/N: Just to avoid confusion, Dib has accepted Tak more on a basis, not out of romantic love, but of a romanticism sort of caring. Sort of like when a nurse gets too attached to a patient.

Romanticism (n): idealization, fantasy, nostalgia, soft focus, rose-tinted glasses, invention, idealism, naivete.

Sounds a lot like Dib, doesn't it?


	19. Chapter 18

A/N: I'm back from recovering from my exhaustion, so let the writing commence! This is mostly an aftermath chapter with lots of dialog.

Once again thanks to my reviewers EduTorresD, MojaveRuler151, Zerg170, Catgirlfireflare, memmek10k, Kazehana23, Guest, Fritter Critter, When can I see you again, crazyanimefreak15, and JanettexAlvin. Your comments and messages encourage me a lot as I am my own worst nuclear powered critic. Thank you all very much.

Yes, a certain part at the end of the chapter is really fast story-wise. But this story is about Zim and Gaz developing a future together, and I prefer not to get too side tracked.

Some have asked if I plan on going back to the CWZ competition. Probably not in the main story, but perhaps as the scene of a final epilogue. It is an annual event, and so far I've only covered less than one month of time! But don't worry, I haven't forgotten about Razor Squadron, or Mrs. Alpha.

EduTorresD: I completely agree with everything you say. Dib is way too calm. His type of franticness is just something I can't seem to capture. It is a large weakness in my writing ability. On the other hand, in the series Dib can be strangely calm at the weird times too. I refer to _Gaz: Taster of Pork_ when Dib went to Zim for help and Zim said his latest plot involved putting exploding monkeys in Gir. Dib's response was basically _whatever_ and walks off. Or during _GameSlave _2 when meeting the rat people. Just an observation, not an excuse. I've also gone back and added a few more lines of narrative. Not much, but to help better show that Dib has not fallen head-over-heels in romantic love with Tak. But he does care a great deal and accepts her into his life. Will have to work more on that chapter at a later time, and just didn't want to spend five chapters developing something between them. That would be a nightmare for me to write as just a side story within this one.

Guest: Boy, you have me pegged! Did we go to the same high school or something? LOL. Yes, like you and probably many IZ fans, their OOC can annoy me too but this story would be impossible without it. So rather than being strictly IC or OOC, I decided at the beginning simply to be _true_ to their character as best I can in the situations I put them in. I spent most of January spinning this story around in my mind, planning what I wanted many of the significant scenes to look like and what details would be involved. In each phase its like moving chess pieces around until everything is in position for the picture I have in my mind. But I do throw in some randomness too and wing it a lot in the setup chapters. Plus I've often discovered elements that would be needed later that I didn't think of before. Sometimes an element (like the last two chapters was nothing like what I pictured three weeks ago) take an unexpected turn or I get a last minute inspiration (like Tak's decent into madness) that I just can't pass up.

As for how I made Tak, I'm glad you liked it. Yes, I did this deliberately and she is a fighter. Elite in fact. Simply the best of Irk in my opinion. But I also see her as more than just a fighter, but a disciplined and professional soldier (even if she is a "little" unstable). She even built her own ship and SIR unit which is so far beyond what other Irkens have developed. Everything she had was custom made out of trash, yet is superior in ability. I know you want her to be a BA, but I think she could be so much more than that too. Plus being Dib's mate will give her a softer side where he is concerned. Perhaps there will be arguments with Zim. IDK. One of the reasons I wrote Tak the way I did was due to the rescue situation. Often the moments just before being rescued is the most dangerous time for those in critical conditions because the casualty can see they are about to be rescued and often stops fighting to survive out of relief that it is going to be over. I incorporated this into Tak's response while on Dirt. I see her character as deserving more than to be just a front-line grunt or a brawler. Writing her just as a BA would be like comparing a gangbanger (no matter how good) to a Navy SEAL. But that doesn't mean she won't be permanently affected by what has happened. She'd always have 'quirks' after something like that, but I think she would try keep such things private and shared only with Dib.

_However, I'm not sure what to do with Mimi._ Not that I intend to drop the character, but she is mostly just a custom and tough, but fairly standard, SIR unit. Also Tak would not have much attachment for military equipment. But then, she's been through a lot too. I'd appreciate any insights and suggestions to put into the character as I've already gone through the Tak episode and Wiki excessively. Also, did anyone else notice how odd it was that in the Tak episode that she did not try to rampage, conquer, or try to enslave mankind like every other typical Invader? I mean her plan was basically to turn Earth into the 'First Galactic Bank of Snacks' for the Tallest. She seemed to me to use minimal amounts of force to secure her objectives, (even when really messing up Zim) and did not seek out to harm humans like the others would have. Hmmm…

To Everyone: Now, before I close this _stupidly_ long Author's Note, I am stating that I do intend to open this storyline up to others once I have finished it (the ending was the first thing I thought of for this story and it will be finished). There are several gaps and missing days, and potential one-shots I've left open if others would like to play in this particular sandbox. Especially in the CWZ competition (Actually now that I think about it, the CWZ thing can be a whole universe to play in on its own). I see no reason to keep others out when I'm playing in someone else's sandbox myself. I'll even help with technical advice, editing and what not. So if you have ideas within what has already been written, keep it in mind! Now on with the story already!

* * *

Flom exited the medical bay as the two new bondmates settled down to sleep for the night. He took his position across the doorway from Yat. She looked at the expression he was trying to hide. "What is it?" she asked.

"Those two in there have bonded. I saw they wear the necklaces now."

"That is disturbing," Yat said.

"You'd better keep in mind the Lady is bonded to one of us too," Flom reminded her.

"Not that. I mean think about it. Only two Irkens have spent more than a few minutes on Earth and lived among humans. Both are now bonded to a human. That's a one hundred percent bonding rate. With _humans_. I heard that all humans bond, too," Yat explained. "Now _we _are going to be stationed on the Lady's homeworld, most likely on a permanent basis."

"That _is_ disturbing," Flom commented. Neither said anything for a while. "Sentinel Yat? If _I_ start bonding with a human, promise me you'll bash my head in."

"No way!" she barked. "Who would bash _my_ head if I started to bond after I bashed in yours?"

They kept silent as an Irken passed by. Another five minutes went by. "You don't suppose we need to check in on them, do we?" asked Flom. "I heard humans eat their mates after bonding."

"Don't be stupid," Yat ridiculed. "They would wait until the human female laid her eggs somewhere. Tak is Irken, so that will never happen. Besides, I heard that the female traditionally wraps the male in a cocoon so he can't get away after her first litter of twenty hatches."

"Yeah, well I heard that a human smeet can sniff out the unbonded in their first three weeks at a range of fifty miles."

"Really?" Yat was surprised. "I heard that they couldn't run until after their first month. Until then they were stuck to the female's back with some kind of superglue they release out of their mouth."

"Humans are so weird," Flom commented.

Silence filled the corridor for several more minutes before Flom spoke again. "If our Lady became a citizen when she bonded to Governor Zim, does that mean this human is a citizen too?"

Yat thought for a moment. "I guess so, and he's a Taller. Very disturbing."

"Yeah," Flom agreed. "But he's no Lady."

"Ootic!" they both grunted, slapping armored forearms together.

* * *

Gaz was lounging on her bed finishing the last few chapters of a book for some stupid report that was due Monday when the new computer on her desk began beeping. She sighed, but not too put off by the interruption. She really wished that _The Grapes of Wrath_ had been written as a horror novel, not as how much a boring economic depression sucked. Including phrases such as 'nuke the site from orbit' would have been a major improvement.

She thankfully put it aside and moved over to her desk. The system sitting there looked like a normal desktop layout, but in reality was a direct link to Computer back at Zim's base. Gaz entered her password to unlock the system. Otherwise it would just act like any other Earth computer. Black and red Irken wallpaper popped up on the screen.

"Good afternoon, Mistress," Computer said over the datalink. "You have an incoming transmission from your brother on the _Doomwind_. Shall I put him through now?"

Gaz thought for a second about making her brother wait anyway, but that was also boring. "Go ahead, Computer."

The screen switched to showing a head-and-shoulder shot of her brother on board her ship somewhere in the Irk system. His trench coat was pulled tight around him, but she wasn't paying much attention. Dib spoke first, his voice a bit slurred. "Hey, Gaz. What are you up to?"

"Getting my book report out of the way so Zim and I can have another movie night. Some dumb chick flick to train Zim. But you can relax," Gaz said before Dib could object. "I still have to fast forward through the steamy parts before Zim goes into dry heaves. But I reward us with a good old black and white horror movie for laughs afterwards."

Dib rubbed his I-just-woke-up eyes. "Gosh, what day is it?" he asked. "My sleep pattern is all out of whack."

"It's late Saturday afternoon. How's Tak doing?"

"Her health is not in danger, but she's in bad shape," Dib informed her. "Tak is still sleeping right now, so they are going to go ahead and break her toes."

Gaz turned her full attention to the display sitting in front of her. "WHAT?" she nearly yelled. "I told them to treat you _both_ like guests on my ship! And YOU, what do you think you're doing going along with that?"

"Gaz! Calm down," Dib said. "Tak is lame. She can't run anymore, and her limp puts too much stress on her knee which also gives her problems. This is part of her treatment so her toes can heal properly. Why do you think I would do such a thing?"

"How about all the times you've threatened to do experiments like that or worse to Zim?" She asked pointedly. "Come on, Dib. Some of that was really messed up to do to another person, even if he was your enemy."

Dib thought back to those times. His recent experience with Tak gave him a new perspective to examine. "Maybe you're right. Trust me, Gaz. I couldn't let them hurt Tak."

Something about the way he said that last sentence struck a chord with in Gaz. "Dib?"

"It was really bad for her down there. They would deliberately drop their loads to try to hit her pod. They didn't deliver enough food, so she was forced to hunt whatever it was that crawled around in that muck and eat the meat to survive. No PAK maintenance either for seven years. No way to clean herself, so she had a lot of infections, plus parasites from what diet she had. I was only down there for under two hours, and _I'll _never forget that place."

Dib interrupted himself for a moment and then continued his update. "She weighs probably a bit less than half what she should, and there is damage to her digestive tract. That will all heal in time, but psychologically she'll never be the same."

"Is she a danger?" Gaz asked.

Dib answered her. "Gaz, down on that planet she almost went over the edge sanity wise. I don't mean crazy. I mean totally insane. But she saved herself. Tak pretty much destroyed her own spirit to do so, and it cost her almost everything on the inside. She's mentioned a few threats to one or two of your Irkens up here, but Lim figured out why and we've fixed that. Tak's got a real jealous streak in her, but she's not really in any shape to be a threat to anybody right now."

"Listen, Dib. If she's not going to recover mentally and she's unstable-"

"I didn't say that," Dib jumped in. Thousands of light-years should be safe enough to interrupt his sister. "She'll recover, but she won't be the same. Some of her mental associations are backward, thinking Irkens as being dirty like Zim thinks humans are. She has a serious thing about needing cleanliness and smelling clean, but that's understandable. Those things are probably never going to go away. She's hesitant about eating solid food thanks to the impact of eating meat had on her, but I think Tak will eventually overcome that one if we don't push her too much. Gaz, she'll always have mental scars. You just don't recover fully from that sort of thing. You learn to live with it."

Dib hung his head down for a minute. "Now I'm beginning to understand why you had to stay with Zim when he had his own thing. When they go down, they go down hard don't they? I have to help her, Gaz."

He was obviously thinking deep. Gaz figured she ought to pull her brother out of it. "Are my guys treating you well?" she asked.

"Yes. They're not like I expected them to be," came the answer.

Gaz had to smile at that. "You mean they are not all wanting to drain your blood and wear your skin?"

"Well, yes. I mean I always thought they were all like Zim."

"Dib, you can relax around these guys," Gaz said. "Beed has been filling me in. They never got programmed to be Irken soldiers, never got the training or were indoctrinated. They aren't all Invaders. They're not even military considering that's what Irkens are naturally geared for."

"I'm starting to see that. But I still have to actively remind myself of that." Dib replied. "Zim, he has some… uh… problems. Doesn't he?"

It was Gaz's turn to look down. "Some regulatory things, yeah. It's his PAK's fault, but it can't be fixed. But he's getting better about it. The hardest part for him was accepting that his PAK isn't exactly what we'd call top of the line. Dib, if Tak's PAK doesn't work right it will be tough for her. They are supposed to be deactivated when that happens."

Dib just nodded his head. "Her PAK was sealed up pretty good, but there was a lot of neglect. Even if it's fine Tak already knows she's not well. She's told me over and over. It was hard to watch."

He pulled a hand up to scratch his neck and his trench coat pulled open. "Listen, Gaz. I'm going to stay here for a while, then I need to bring Tak home. Things have gotten a bit complicated."

Gaz stared at the display in front of her. She could see a familiar pendant peeking past Dib's black coat. One she saw everyday in the mirror and when she looked at Zim. It reminded her of the accustomed weight around her own neck.

"What the hell, Dib?" she yelled. "What did you DO? I said save the girl, not snag the girl!"

"You think I planned this?" Dib yelled back. "And like your one to talk!"

"Excuse me?" Gaz's voice turned deadly. Dib had never fired back at her before. "We may not have known what we were signing and I didn't know about the necklace thing, but at least I didn't take advantage of Zim when he was down! You knew what these were! Were you really _that_ desperate, Dib?"

"WHAT?" Dib screeched. "You really think that little of me? That I would do such a thing? To _Tak_? Who do you think you are, Gaz, to pass judgment on me when you hooked up with Zim of all people! You weren't here. Yes, I screwed up. But just like you and Zim, we had no idea until it was too late. Lim was the one who recognized that Tak had bonded! And Tak didn't even ask me to accept her! She gave me an out, but I couldn't take it."

The two continued to glare daggers at each other. Then Gaz digested what Dib had said. Perhaps she had jumped the gun a little, but he was out of line too. She hated it, but she knew she didn't really have a leg to stand on for the moment. Grumbling, she backed down from her brother for the first time in her life. She really hated it.

"Fine. What happened?" she asked crossly.

"I had the pool setup like I planned. But she thought she was losing it again and shut down. I mean she was really bad, Gaz. She couldn't help herself at all. I had to carry her into the pool and bathe her with my own hands." Dib pinched his nose at the memory. "I did right by her, Gaz. I really did. Even when I had to be the one to take off her uniform."

Gaz's eyes nearly bulged out of her head, but she could hear the care reflected back through Dib's recall. "You mean you-"

"Got up close and personal with Irken anatomy? Yes. It was not easy. She thinks that's when it started. Then her process accelerated on the flight to Irk," Dib tried to explain. "If I had been in a biohazard suit maybe things would have been different. If I hadn't been in such a rush maybe I would have thought things through more."

Gaz could start to see how things could have gone like that. "What stage is she in?" she asked in a voice that was more calm.

"You don't understand. She went through the entire process in a matter of hours. It seemed to be driven by scent. I smelled clean and she needed to smell that. We didn't know. Gaz, she's not in a stage because her bond is complete. Her biology is so tuned into mine that if she's separated from me for very long she'll become unstable trying to get back to me."

Gaz was speechless for several reasons. Dib kept going. "Listen, Gaz. She showed me the necklaces. She needed to wear one to show herself as bonded. She didn't ask me to accept, but said I could do whatever with mine. I couldn't reject her, Gaz. Not on top of everything else. I just couldn't do it. How could I when she has to be near me just to remain biologically stable? I just…" Dib began shaking his head.

"You threw yourself on your sword for her, didn't you?" she asked more softly than before. He nodded. "You know it was still stupid."

"Yep," he muttered. "You know Zim is going to become the same way? Especially when he starts running his antennae through your hair. You'd better get used to it."

They didn't say anything for at least a minute. Dib spoke first. "It wasn't easy for you, was it? Coming to terms about you and Zim? I put a lot of extra pressure on you when you could have used someone to open up to, didn't I?"

Gaz nodded, giving her brother her 'I guess I won't doom you yet' look. "No, it wasn't. So stop stating the obvious and get to your stupid point."

"I'll fully support you and Zim from now on. Okay? But Tak and I could probably use some too. She won't like it, but I think she'll need an Irken to talk with who is in the same boat she is in. Same goes for you and I."

"Fine," Gaz agreed. "Since you warned me about Zim getting all touchy with his antennae, I'll clue you in on the necklace. You can't take it off ever, for any reason. It's failsafe will cut off your air way until you stop tampering with it."

"Thanks for the warning," Dib said. "Listen, I need a big favor for Tak."

"Another one?" Gaz cocked her eyebrow. "I seem to have done you quite a few already."

"I know," admitted Dib. "But this isn't for me. It's for Tak."

"What is it you want?"

"I think we could use a supply drop if its not too much trouble. Tak has developed a thing for honey. Maybe ten large bottles? Plus the pillows and sheets from my bed. But don't wash them. It might help Tak to be around bedding that smells like me. If I am called away, I'm late or something she will need something to help her get through it."

Gaz didn't respond for a moment. "It's that bad? She's _that_ dependent on your presence?"

Dib nodded. "Zim will eventually reach this point too, so you should start taking these things into consideration for your own future."

"All right. But you are really racking up the favors here. Just calling one Fast Courier out here costs galactic monies. We've already spent the equivalent of almost thirty thousand dollars just to get you to Dirt." Gaz stopped her complaint when Computer flashed an approval text on her display. _What is he up to?_ she asked.

Dib gulped. "I'm sorry. I didn't know. I hate to ask for more, but Tak will need permanent documentation, a birth certificate, that sort of thing. Plus whatever support equipment an Irken needs at home. She'll need her human disguise operational." Dib paused. "Gaz? Tak needs something to do. They all seem very mission oriented. Could you ask-" Dib gulped. "-Zim about that for her? If she wants it that is? Dad would probably give her a job at the lab for us, but you know…"

She nodded in complete understanding. "Dib, you must really care about her if you are willing to lean on Zim for a favor of this magnitude." Gaz shook her head. "I'll have Computer get things worked up for his approval. I won't go behind Zim's back on something like this. Will she be living at the new base or here?"

"I don't know. This is all kind of sudden."

"I know exactly what you mean." Gaz checked something in her computer files. "_Doomwind_ won't be fully loaded and ready to depart for the hypergate until Friday morning. You will probably have come from the new base directly to skool. But I need a favor from you."

"Name it," Dib immediately responded.

"I need you to start preparing my people for a life on Earth," Gaz stated. "You know, like an orientation class. They are my responsibility and I have to provide for all of them. Can I trust you to do that?"

Dib thought for a moment. She was right in that she had a responsibility for them, and to help them fit in to their new place on Earth without invading and blowing stuff up. It wasn't like they were there to cause trouble. Actually, having Gaz's Irkens around to defend against threats from outer space had a certain appeal to it.

"Just basic orientation stuff? I think I can do that if Zim will send me what he has on adapting to Earth. Kind of give me an idea of what they may need to know. Plus could you send up some of our home movies? Like our Family Fun Nights and such would be good to help them get to know you. Even just from what little I've overheard they all think highly of you, almost like some sort of folk hero."

Gaz was very surprised to hear this. "All right. I'll see what I can dig up that isn't stupid or you being you."

"Thanks, Gaz. HEY!"

Gaz smiled and went on before he could respond further. "Dib, you accepted Zim into our family. I suppose I ought to give Tak a chance. Considering you _married_ her, I'll go ahead and assume she's not a threat to us."

Her brother started to imitate a fish out of water. Accepting Tak's bond and truly realizing what that really meant were two completely different things. Gaz grinned, glad that with all this being supportive junk that she still hadn't lost her touch completely. "Don't worry. I won't tell everyone at skool she's pregnant too. Tell your wife I said hi." And with that she cut the connection.

* * *

Computer sent a request to the Courier Service for a pickup. Deliveries to or from Earth were usually few and far between. This would show Roz that their agreement had been honored immediately, which would improve moral and make her more willing to do favors in the future. However, he did not order Gir to collect ten bottles of honey from the nearest store. Computer told the robot to pick up one hundred and fifty. One of his biggest difficulties was converting Earth currency, which he had plenty of, into the galactic monies which had been spent like water lately. If there was a market for Earth honey it would solve some real problems and open up new opportunities for Computer's financial hobby. An administrative computer at one of the better snack bars owed him a favor and would make a good test market for the delicious goo.

* * *

Dib looked at the blank display before him in the _Doomwind_'s communications compartment. He had been so focused on saving Tak and being there for her that he hadn't thought at all about the significance of the step he had taken in accepting her into his life. He had acknowledged that it would be close between them, that this would be permanent. Dib even recognized the concept that Tak would be Zim's sister. But in the moment he didn't think about what it meant_ for him._ It wasn't official or recognized back on Earth, but everywhere else it was.

He had never really thought about this sort of thing before. True, it would have been nice to dream something like that would have been in his future, but he didn't have any illusions about how anti-popular he was. And certainly he never dreamed an Irken would be part of that!

Dib looked down at his hands. The thing was he _did_ like Tak. She was a mess right now, but she was the only girl he had ever really connected with all those years ago. The only one at skool who hadn't criticized is paranormal interests and yet was still intelligent and not an all out freak. Of course what was paranormal for him had been normal everyday life for Tak. He had also never stopped listening for her emergency beacon, wondering what had happened to her. Granted some of that was about whether or not she could still represent a threat to Earth, but part of that wasn't. Maybe he was a bit too into the paranormal after all, because he genuinely cared about the alien girl quite a bit. Well, more than that if he was honest with himself, because she wasn't _just_ an alien girl anymore.

A beeping came from the terminal in front of him. Zim appeared on the display. "Dib-stink. Gaz-blossom tells me you found yourself some trouble. That you want this favor from Zim. Why should Zim do this?"

Dib responded at once. This was an easy question. "Because we're family. As much as we may hate it, we are brothers and Tak is now your sister too. And family members aren't supposed to turn their backs when one is in need." Naturally Zim did not look impressed. "Plus it will earn you points with my sister. She may try to not let it show most of the time, but family is really important to her."

"Tak is unstable, yes? Tell Zim the truth. Is she a danger?"

"She probably has some stability problems, and has a real jealous streak in her. Plus I think she could be really vindictive again if she let herself. So you probably will want to hold off on insulting us humans. She sees us as clean, so calling me a dirt-being, Dib-stink and your usual insults will really tick her off something fierce," Dib said.

"You wish to be allies in Zim's mission to defend your homeworld? Is that what you are asking?" Zim asked.

"_Your_ mission? Defending Earth was _my_ cause since the first day you showed up!" Dib growled. "Wait. What? You could see us as allies? I thought you just saw us humans as either slaves or things to get rid of."

Zim actually looked a bit embarrassed at the moment. "Gaz-blossom is human, and is worth everything to Zim. She is exceptional, not a dirt-bring. Zim's views have unfortunately been forced into some adjustment as unpleasant as it is. Your bonding with Tak now makes you an Irken citizen as well, not an enemy species. Zim is unhappily required to adjust to this."

Dib sighed. "Look, Zim. You love a human. I care a lot about an Irken. It seems we have something in common. You remember when you said that at times you may need some advice regarding Gaz?" Zim nodded. "Well, I will need some regarding Tak. We can help each other. Can we put the past behind us and start over? Can we stop the feuding for their sakes? I told Gaz that I'm willing to fully support you two in your marriage."

Zim looked at Dib for a long time. Then he spoke again. "You know Zim does not really understand this family thing? But Zim is learning. As for Tak, Zim has nothing personal against her. You however will require much more time."

"Zim can we go to a private frequency? I have something to say," Dib requested.

The screen filled with static for a moment as a scrambler code kicked in. Zim's image reappeared. "Go on," he said.

Dib took a deep breath and dove in. "Let's quit this posturing crap. You love Gaz with all your heart or whatever you call it. I care about Tak and will learn to love her just as much someday. I know one day that Gaz will want children. She longs to see the smeet you designed for her at some point in the future. She admitted that to me herself. I don't know about Tak. Its way too soon for me to think about it." Zim's eyes were growing large at the mention of smeets. "But whatever happens, they all will be half human, half Irken and related to each other by that same blood. If something happened to you and Gaz, I'd raise your kids as my own and Gaz would do the same if something happened to me. _That_ is what it means to be family, Zim."

Zim sat frozen for a very long time. It seemed his brain had blown a fuse. After an eternity is mouth opened slowly. "Zim… understands now. Zim agrees to this."

_Wait. What? Did we just agree to become future guardians_? Dib asked himself. _I think we just did._

Something seemed to have clicked in Zim's brain as his expression was impossible to define. Dib plunged forward with what he needed to say next. "Zim, if the Tallest ordered you to conquer Earth again, would you do it?"

"That will not happen. They hate Zim and want nothing to do with me. Also once a planet has been designated for a purpose, it does not get changed."

"What if they did change their mind?"

"They would not tell Zim of such a purpose, and their last orders would be followed."

He wouldn't come right out and say it, and Dib wouldn't force Zim to do so. Dib changed the subject to something more personal.

"Zim, I want to do right by Tak. She's completely bonded to me, and I'll spend the rest of my life trying to be good toward her and taking care of her. I know she can be tough and all, but she'll never be the person she was. I want to do something, a human thing. But I'm like a billion light-years from the mall. I need some help to make a purchase on-line and for someone to pick it up before the next supply run. If I tell you where I left my debit card, can I trust you to not screw me over?"

"If Zim sends you communications frequencies of all major powers that can hold against the Empire, can Zim trust you with the information you gather to not betray us?" The alien asked. "To use discretion in utilizing your position with your Swollen Eyeballs? You are an investigator and an Irken citizen. There is much going on out there and Earth is now a protectorate of the Irken Empire. You well know defending a planet is much more difficult than attacking one."

Well putting it that way, trusting Zim with a debit card didn't seem like a very big thing. "Deal. Maybe you and Gaz can go shopping together before your movie night tonight. Tak could use a few sets of clothes and I don't think she will be inclined toward wearing an Irken uniform any more. Right now she's only got the one sweater and sweatpants."

The alien on the display continued. "That will be up to Gaz-blossom. Zim will also speak to Tak about an appointment. Destroying things is my specialty. Being Governor of a Protectorate Planet requires more than just Zim. "

"Tak is still under going corrective surgery for her foot right now," Dib informed him, looking at his watch. "Can you call her later? Perhaps in a few hours?"

"Very well. Gaz is still finishing up for her book report. Something about monster grapes showing their wrath against human farmers. Zim will begin transmitting his files on adapting to Earth for your first class."

* * *

Zim and Gaz parted ways at the mall. She had been desperate for any excuse to get away from her boring book. Zim went into his store to pick up Dib's small package. They had gotten the necessary measurements from the bio-technician on the _Doomwind_ before departing for the mall. Gaz, with Dib's debit card in hand, went off to the wardrobe department with a mischievous grin on her face.

The disguised alien went up to the female behind the counter. "I am ZIM. I have come to pick up a package for my," he still had to grit his teeth a bit, "brother. It is under Membrane."

The clerk went to another counter and pulled a tagged box from underneath as Zim looked around at the various objects on display. He had seen similar things in some of the movies Gaz had forced him to watch. The clerk asked the alien if he saw anything he liked as she handed him the package.

Zim kept thinking about part of the conversation he and Dib had as he looked at the displays set before him. "Do you do custom work? I've got about two hours." Zim asked as he popped a credit card out of his PAK and handed it to the clerk. He hated shopping, and had Gir do most of it. But today it couldn't be helped as the robot was on a honey run. Besides, he got to spend more time with Gaz-blossom.

The clerk took the card with a skeptic look and ran it through her credit check scanner. Her eyes grew wide at the read-out, and she ran to get the manager.

The manager returned with the credit card in hand. With a credit limit like this, they'd practically carve something out of the moon and build a time machine to deliver it yesterday if that was what Zim wanted. "So you are asking for a custom build? We don't usually do a rush order. We could modify an existing one if you wish. What price range were you looking at?"

Zim pulled his Pad out of his PAK that had a design displayed on the small screen. Zim had drawn it when he had placed the online order for Dib. "I'd like this made from a titanium alloy. And what's a price range?" he asked, clearly puzzled.

The manager's eyes nearly sprung up dollar signs.

* * *

Gaz returned two hours later holding several large bags. She had found plenty of things in various shades of purple, but finding clothes that could accommodate a PAK wasn't easy. Gaz had thrown in a couple of backpacks that could cover it and be sewn into an outfit. Or whatever Irkens did with fabrics. Or was it synthetics? She wasn't even sure what the point was since Tak's holographic disguise was being repaired. It didn't really matter. What did matter was that she had an opportunity and she took it. She smiled as she imagined Dib's reaction.

Zim stood up from a nearby bench traditionally used by guys to wait for their gals to spend their money on girly things. They left the mall arm in arm and returned to Gaz's Jeep. They'd be back in plenty of time to meet Roz's delivery ship.

* * *

Tak slowly opened her eyes. There was a low throbbing pain in her foot. "Dib?" she groggily called.

An Irken face leaned into her vision of the medical bay's ceiling. The bio-technician spoke to her. "Tak, your human bondmate is not here at the moment. He was in the communications room last I heard. We asked him to leave us so we could have room to do our work. Your foot has been repaired, and immobilized in a remedial brace, so you will have a significant limp and impaired mobility for the next day or two as the bones mend. You're holographic device has been restored but with all the neglect it is now limited to only one partial profile. A PAK support unit has also been moved to your quarters, so you are officially discharged from the medical bay. Exercise limits have been downloaded to your PAD. We were going to let you rest longer, but Governor Zim has been most insistent on speaking with you. He would not wait."

Tak sat up on the table and dangled her legs over the ledge. She was still wearing her sweats outfit, and her injured foot was encased in a slim yet unyielding brace made of something like cloth. It was firm but not scratching or chaffing like a solid material would be. The bio-technician pressed a button on a wall display and left the room. Zim's image filled the screen.

Naturally Tak was not pleased. "What do _you_ want, Zim?" she said.

"Zim has been speaking with the Dib-… With Dib. We have been discussing a few things. Mostly about you, directly or indirectly. He asked us to get you a few things, and they should be arriving soon."

"Get to the point, Zim." Tak muttered crossly.

"You know of my new mission? To defend Earth?"

"You mean your so-called governorship that you aren't qualified for, ruling a planet you can't touch, unwanted by the rest of the Empire, pledged to defend the same planet from no one since nobody wants it?" Tak snapped.

"Yes. That one. The one with no real responsibility other than what Zim chooses for himself, no superiors telling Zim what he should do or how. With no one but my exceptional Gaz-blossom telling me to do better or expecting anything from me."

Neither really knew what to say after that. "Well since you put it like that, maybe you _are_ qualified for it," Tak said sarcastically.

Zim was not pleased either. "You don't fool me, and Zim knows that my PAK is substandard, so don't bother. We all know Zim is not suited to do this because Zim just wrecks stuff, and that this mission is supposed to be my prison. A little like yours was. But my Gaz is convinced that we can make it into something real."

Zim paused before he spoke again. "Dib is trying to provide for his mate. He asked me to find something for you to do."

"Me? Work for _you?_" Tak laughed. "Why would I? You destroyed my life! I should have been one of the best of the Elite! An Invader!"

"Yes, Zim started it. But did Zim reject your application? Send you to Dirt? Did Zim send you back there after your first escape?" the Irken asked her. "Or did Zim have a hand in your rescue? In helping your new mate reach Dirt's surface without being shot down? Be honest with yourself, _Tak._" He did not say her name with fondness. "You forget who you are really talking to. You have a mate. That would not have happened any other way. Zim is in the same place. If Zim was a real Invader, if Zim hadn't been sent into a disguised exile to this planet Zim would not have met my Gaz-blossom either. Neither of us are really capable of wanting things to have turned out differently."

Tak just glared daggers at Zim's image. She hated that he was right.

"You have some regard for the humans, Zim hears. Can you go any place else or even want to?" Zim asked rhetorically. "Zim is not asking you to work for me, Tak. We'd like you to help me get this primitive world defendable. You are good, Tak. The one of the best even. Resourceful, intelligent, and inventive with only outdated materials to work with. Exactly what this mission needs."

"So what are you asking me to be? Another soldier drone? I won't do that. You can't make me one of the Elite or an Invader. You can't give back what was taken from me." She threw at him.

"No Zim can't, but Zim knows your bondmate better than you do. He could not accept you being one of the Irken Elite and definitely not an Invader. The defense of his homeworld is too stuck in his brainmeat," the Irken on the screen told her.

Tak's eyes widened with alarm. Her mate not accept her? Reject her? Deny her his scent? Nothing could be worse for a Irken bondmate.

Zim went on. "You misunderstand. You can be something Dib needs for his planet more than anything. What he's fought for practically his whole life. There is no way Zim can make you an Invader, so would you settle for being a General in charge of this star system's defense?"

"A…a General?" she stuttered. _But Generals are only drawn from the Elite and Invader lists,_ she thought.

"It would be easy enough. You wouldn't believe how messed up Irken bureaucracy is. The only ranks Computer can't establish for you are Elite, Invader and Tallest. He already has the papers all drawn up. All he needs is your approval."

Tak blinked heavily several times. "You mean, it would be for real? But I wouldn't be working for you either?"

Zim regarded her briefly. "Zim is the one who bears the responsibility for this planet, but we want people to work with us. Me and my bondmate with you and your bondmate. Has a nice symmetry, don't you think? Besides, after partnering with my Gaz-blossom for her project Zim has learned the value of working as a team."

Tak could hardly believe her antennae. "But…but you're…ZIM! The scourge of anyone you come in contact with!"

"Yes," Zim said almost smugly. "Also there is my Gaz-blossom, the devious doomer of all who annoy her. Then your human Dib the intractable, and you the unrelenting. Can you think of a better combination?"

Tak didn't say anything. She couldn't.

Zim eyed her hesitation. "Okay. Let's drop the pretenses, shall we? Can we speak as one bondmate to another? You and I are the only two Irkens with human bondmates in the universe."

She nodded. It was a point she could appreciate. "I can do that. What do you want?"

The Irken on the wall display before her hesitated. "My Gaz-blossom isolated herself from everyone for most of her life. She is getting better about it, but even for a human she can be very independent. Tak, how attached will Zim get to his wife?"

"I don't know." Tak said. "Mine is not a natural bond. Dib and I haven't tried to be separated for long yet. But I know I can't endure without him anymore. I do know if he left this ship I'd have to go with him. I can't ever be separated from my mate for a long period of time. He's been very understanding, but I know he is only trying to start his own bonding process. You might be able to go a few days without her scent once you are finished with your bond. Perhaps longer. But you will long for her smell, then crave it to remain stable. Her bio-functions, no matter how disgusting you may have found them to be in the past, will no longer bother you at all. I don't know much more. I've only been bonded a day or two."

"Okay, Tak. Zim has some advice for you," Zim offered in return. "Humans don't bond like we do." Tak started to scoff at the obvious fact. "They have many different _kinds_ of bonding. Usually only one for mates, but also several for those considered their family unit, some for social associations, and but their strongest is for their offspring. They are able to manage all of these at once."

Tak felt like her head would spin if she just tried to comprehend such an arrangement. Zim went on. "Dib will need you to control your jealousy and learn to understand that other females are not trying to steal your bondmate. He has a sister he cares for quite a bit, and even if he agrees with her over you there is no need to be jealous as a mate. It is very complicated but it is part of their species unfortunately. Also they have traditions to include bondmates into their family circle. Zim married his Gaz-blossom, so Dib and Zim are now brothers. You are bonded to Dib, which makes you and Zim brother and sister as well. My bondmate is also your sister. We all share the same family name and now so do you."

Tak was getting dizzy. "I think I'd rather go back to talking about me being a General."

"Can't blame you. It is most cumbersome to think about. If you agree, Zim will even try not to call the humans dirt-creatures or call your mate Dib-stink in front of you. Zim is starting to realize that calling humans such, even though it is deserved, demeans my human bondmate. She deserves the best from Zim."

"You _better_ not call him that! Humans are the cleanest of all species!" Tak declared loudly.

"What!" Zim exclaimed. "They are so primitive and low to the ground. Their intellect is minimal at best and can't even notice the blatantly obvious! They have to bathe in acidic water just to keep the stink off of them."

Tak countered angrily. "Just because they don't use their brainmeat doesn't mean they aren't smart at all. They have more advanced bonding structures that we Irkens do! They are only technologically behind because we've had longer and take the best from everybody we conquer. As for bathing in water, that's just how their biology adapted to their insane planet. Besides, you yourself said that there are exceptions among humans!"

"You lie, you… you human lover!" Zim yelled back at her.

"Look who's talking, xenophile!" Tak screamed in return. "You said your human mate was an exception! Admit it!"

"Fine! Why are we yelling?" Zim shouted.

"I don't know, Defect!" Tak hollered at the display.

"Well I don't know either, Reject! You want the job?" shrieked Zim.

"I'll take it!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

They glared at one another for a few more moments. Then Zim broke the silence. "We both should have been deactivated long ago, you know that?"

Tak cracked a laugh, which surprised her. "Yes, well I heard that having brainworms was a prerequisite for this screwball outfit. More brainworms equals higher rank."

"Well, _General_ Tak, Dib asked for a few things so the delivery ship should be arriving soon. Gaz picked out some clothes for you, and there is an ample supply of Earth honey to get you through the week. Why don't you go find your human and settle down? I've kept mine waiting too long as it is, and Gaz-blossom does not like being kept waiting. She usually finds ways of making Zim pay."

* * *

Yat brought Tak to the maintenance bay that was being used as a receiving area for the smaller delivery ships that were starting to come in. Tak followed Yat past the scurrying heavy grav lifters loaded with cargo modules of various colors and sizes. The area had become fairly busy since she had slept.

Eventually she saw Dib standing by himself along a back wall as he fiddled with a loaned Pad with Flom a discreet distance away. Tak nodded an acknowledgement to Yat and activated her holo-disguise within her PAK. Flom turned as he noticed the approaching pair and threw a questioning glance at Yat who gave her own gestured confirmation. Yat joined Flom as Tak limped up to Dib.

The human heard the nearby mismatched footsteps behind him and turned around. He let out a small gasp as a remembered human form with a recently familiar and saddening limp reached him. He hadn't seen that face in so long. "Tak?" he asked hesitantly.

"They fixed my holographic disguise. I thought it would make things easier for you," she said.

Dib tried not to stare at her. The face was subtly different to reflect another seven years of age, yet it was the same as he had remembered. The dark blue hair, pale human skin, the illusion of makeup darkening her eyelids and the silver studs in her ears. Holographic human eyes looked up at him. The system could no longer provide attire, but molded with her white sweater and sweatpants. He didn't know what to say. This was the Tak he knew of old, but it wasn't real either.

The human form moved in close to stand by her bondmate. The form was the same, yet it was different too. Then he noticed it was the eyes. Those human looking eyes were completely different. Same shape and color, but not aloof like long ago. He hadn't noticed back then, but now it was like night and day. These eyes were warm as they looked into his own. Dib decided he had to say something.

"Hi, Tak," Dib said again, then mentally smacked himself for being a doofus.

She smiled a human looking smile. "I heard you were trying to make provisions for me while I was in surgery."

Dib nodded. "Had to ask for some more favors to get you some things. Flom said the delivery ship is coming aboard in a few minutes. There is something special I want to collect before everything gets sent to quarters."

Tak leaned into her bondmate to take in his human scent, and Dib timidly gave his consent by putting an arm around her. She sensed his hesitation. "Dib?"

"It's okay, Tak. I'm just dealing with so many new things that I never imagined I'd face," He told her above the whine of grav lifters. "I didn't expect you to be in your disguise when I'm the only human on board. I wasn't sure how to respond and I don't want cause to distress. Plus being surrounded by Irkens used to be the stuff of nightmares for me. Now my sister has me giving classes for them about living on Earth. The first one starts in about ten minutes with the senior guard."

"Dib, you are being a good mate for me," Tak reassured him. "Beyond what I could have hoped for. You even went and convinced your old enemy to give me a rank on Earth."

"He did? What did he have in mind?" Dib asked nervously.

"Commanding General for your home system's external defense. I've accepted."

Dib dropped his arm away from Tak. He saw the immediate worry in her eyes.

"Dib? I though you would be pleased." Tak looked down to Dib's chest. "Zim told me that you could never accept me if I was one of the Elite or and Invader. That had been what I wanted my whole life. But I thought that if I traded that for being a General for your world you would-"

The human felt guilty about his involuntary response. He lead Tak to a secluded spot behind several stacked containers. Dib pulled her in to an embrace and guided her head to his shoulder.

"Tak, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that. Just like you have things to deal with from your time on Dirt, I have things to deal with from my struggle to keep Zim from blowing up, conquering, and having my planet invaded by Irken soldiers. I lived with my own nightmare for a long time too, Tak. When I found you on Dirt and you were so lost, I forgot you were once going to be a part of all that. This just brought it back for a moment. You're not the only one who has irrational bits in their brain. I've just been trying to find my balance here. Irkens were my most dangerous enemies for almost my entire childhood and I was alone in that fight because everyone around me either was too stupid, clueless or just didn't care like I did. Now I am the only non-Irken on this ship and I have to actively think about how these ones aren't a danger to me or my planet while I have to get them ready for life on Earth. I'm just jumpy on the inside right now, okay?"

Dib pulled back a little so he could look down at Tak, her being a full foot shorter than he. The human reached up and brushed a comforting hand into holographic hair. He felt her antennae curled back around her head underneath the illusion. "I won't deny you, Tak. I've accepted your bond, haven't I? Knowing that you are bonded to me for the rest of your life? I won't betray your bond."

The sound of heavy airlock doors opening followed by a tractor beam activating cut over the persistent whine of grav lifts. Dib turned his head toward the sound. "You okay now? I think that's our delivery."

"I will be," Tak said, letting go of her human.

"All right. Let's talk again later tonight. I asked my sister to send my bedding and some clothes for you and I have my first orientation meeting in a few minutes."

She waived off Dib's helping hand as she limped with him the length of the long maintenance bay over to the delivery ship that was now being set down on the deck. Tak could have used the assistance, and really did want the aid of her mate. But she needed to start pushing herself again. Right now she couldn't even run. The Irken had a long way to go before she could be an Elite of Earth. Not that their standards were all that high, but Tak had her own to reach in due time. Plus she had to set an example for the rest of the troops now. At least until she could be alone with Dib.

The Irken pilot hopped out of the delivery ship's cockpit and the current deck coordinator pointed her to the approaching pair with their ever present escorts. A small hand drawn cargo lift was made available, and the pilot opened up the back of the ship as they made their slow way to her.

When they finally arrived the pilot introduced herself. "Logistic Specialist Roz with a delivery for Dib. You Dib?" she asked the male human. He nodded. "I need you to sign for this."

Dib made a 'take it easy' squeeze of Tak's hand as she glared imaginary laser beams at the Irken female for talking to _her_ mate. Tak looked up at Dib's face and nodded an acknowledgement that her jealousy was getting the better of her again.

Dib signed for the delivery. "I don't suppose you're the same Roz that towed me out to Dirt a few days ago?"

"That was you?" Roz asked loudly. "That was an epic ride! Thanks to you I'm the sole delivery pilot for the Earth run. That is so _sweet!_" The Irken seemed to be on a permanent sugar high.

As Yat and Flom helped unload the boxes of large honey bottles onto the cargo lift, Tak pulled out much lighter shopping bags of clothing and rolls of Dib-smelling bed sheets, blankets and pillows. She took a big sniff of each before setting them down on top of the cargo lift.

While they were doing this, Roz pulled something out of her uniform and handed it to Dib. "Governor Zim also instructed me to deliver this myself into your hands only."

"Thanks," Dib said, putting the small package in his pocket. He looked at his wristwatch. "Guys," he called. "I have to run off to my orientation meeting. Tak? I'll talk with you more tonight."

Dib followed Flom off toward where his first meeting would take place while Roz closed up her ship and went through her checklist in preparation for her next delivery.

Yat took hold of the handles of the cargo lift. "Tak, I will have to insist that you climb on the back and hold on to the load. The Bio-technician told you to take it easy if you want your foot to heal. You have already exceeded his specified walking distance for today. I will have to report to him that you are deviating from his treatment outline."

Tak grumbled an acceptance and how stupid Irken bio specialists thought they knew what was best for everybody. Yat pulled the cargo lift along into the corridor as she delivered the load and passenger to Tak's new quarters.

* * *

Dib followed Flom back to his quarters. The first orientation meeting had taken a lot out of him. The initial group had been horrified that Earth's surface was mostly water and that it also fell from the sky. They could hardly believe him when he said that humans were so dependent on the substance to survive for more than a few days. That life on Earth could not exist without the liquid that would burn an Irken.

Not to mention that drinking a bottle of water in front of them was like the greatest magic trick they had ever seen.

Dib had gone over some of the countermeasures Zim had come up with to protect himself from rain, such as bathing in paste. Naturally he commented on how dumb this was since all he really had to do was go out and buy a raincoat for those rainy days.

Then there were the questions that had been asked.

_Is it true that humans eat rocks and clean themselves with molten lava?_

_ Do their arms grow back if removed?_

_ What about their legs?_

_ Can they steal an Irken's squeedilyspooch just by looking into them with their x-ray vision?_

_ Could they really eat the flesh of other living things? _The gasps echoing through the room when that was confirmed was strangely satisfying. Of course Dib had to clarify that humans did not eat other sentient beings. Naturally this led to the question. _Why don't they?_

_Is it true that humans bond with the first thing they see?_ That one was so simple, yet so hard to explain to a species that really had only one kind of meaningful bond that most of them never experienced.

There were many questions about human bonding. Or rather how to fend off attacking humans seeking out a bond. It seemed there were many rumors about how Earth was filled with roving hordes of humans seeking Irken bondmates like swarming post-apocalyptic zombies seeking out the brains of the living.

Dib was led to the door leading into his private quarters. He saw Yat standing to one side of the portal as Flom took his position on the other side. The human stepped through still processing the insane questions he had spent a long time trying to clarify. The door closed behind him, and Dib leaned against it with closed eyes. He let out a several deep breaths.

He opened his eyes. This room was more cramped than he remembered. The portable toilet and water shower were in the far corner like last time, and his bags of clothes and other supplies were neatly piled next to the facilities. But the pile was larger with a few new paper bags and neater too. His gaze swept across the compartment. The hammock was now wider, with an Irken PAK support unit sitting next to it near the wall. The hammock itself looked to be two hammocks clipped together with another one running underneath the seam for support. His bedding, blankets and pillows had been arranged into what almost looked like some sort of nest.

There was a form laying on her side in the middle of the arrangement surrounded by blankets. A holographic human one. Dib's jaw hung open as he noticed she was wearing a very light purple and backless nightgown fitting around her PAK, which was exposed through the holographic disguise, with fragile looking straps running over her shoulders. She had her Pad out and was tapping on it with a half empty honey bottle cradled in her arm.

"Tak? What are you doing?" Dib managed to get out.

She looked up and smiled at her floundering mate. "Sentinel Yat out there forbids me any mobility for the rest of the day and well into tomorrow or she will complain to the bio-technician. So as I am stuck here, I was going over this ship's technical specifications. There would be insufficient power to upgrade the secondary energy weapons grid to a primary grid or add extra secondary batteries. I think if we added liquid helium coolant lines underneath the outer hull or radiator vanes to the turrets, we can double the volume of fire for short periods by the point defense batteries. However, I believe with a few adjustments to the bulkheads in these sections I can add a few missile platforms on retractable launchers. They will require dual or perhaps triple mounts per platform to achieve an acceptable fire rate, but magazine space would be limited. Or perhaps augment a few compartments for large bore launch tubes for torpedoes with multiple independent fusion warheads. I think that would be a mistake though as this vessel was not configured to be a battleship, but as a defensive mobile base for strike craft. So I am also thinking more along those lines, but I have insufficient data about what resources will be available."

There was something about the concept of a human appearing girl wearing a slinky nightie in his room, and laying in his bedding no less, and the concept of a disguised Irken talking about potential weapon mixes and rates of fire that shorted out his stressed brain.

"I mean what are you doing in my quarters? Wearing that?" he asked in a higher voice than normal.

Tak looked at him with a peculiar expression. "You are my mate. Where else would my quarters be than with you? There was a note from Gaz saying that this is what is worn when one had retired for the day. That the red evening dress she sent is what is worn for dates and to woo a mate."

_Of course Gaz would get Tak something like this since I gave her such a good opportunity she couldn't pass it up. This is for giving her a difficult time about Zim_, he thought as his cheeks turned red. _She's really driving the point home about what I got myself into without any mercy._

Tak got up out of the hammock and stepped over to Dib with her now exaggerated limp due to her immobile foot brace. Dib's face got redder. She gave a slightest toss of the head, a small indication that the form underneath the hologram did not have a nose and a wave of air was being sent across her antennae. "You are stressed and don't smell clean." She pointed to the shower. "You get clean. Now."

_A cold shower sounds like such a good idea right now_, thought Dib as he carefully navigated his way around Tak to his neat piles of clothing. He found that they had been sorted and categorized as well. He set a fresh pair of pajamas next to the shower and looked in Tak's direction. She had sat back down on the edge of the hammock and was giving her bondmate a rather impatient look that promised no quarter for his outmoded sense of decorum.

The human sighed with his back turned and a few moments later entered the shower undressed. At least it had a curtain. He stood in the spraying cold water leaning his forehead against the side of the stall.

"Dib?" The voice was just outside the curtain. "You are having difficulty again, aren't you?"

"You could say that," he answered.

"I know you are trying, Dib," she said. "But ever since I woke up today I have caused you to have trouble. I was so happy when you chose to accept me as your bondmate. But perhaps it was just a dream and now I'm awake."

Dib flinched inside. He began washing off as quickly as he could. He didn't hear the door open, so Tak must still be in the room. He shut the shower off and stuck his head past the curtain. He saw no one, so he stepped out and vigorously dried himself off with a towel and slipped into his pajamas.

"Tak?" he called out softly.

"Yes?" came a muffled reply. It was coming from under the nest of blankets on the hammock. He didn't see her.

Dib grabbed his jeans and walked the few steps over to the hammock. He set his jeans on the end of the hammock and called again. "Tak, you in there?"

A flap of blanket was pushed down, exposing the holographic head and arms with very sad eyes. "Tak, could you please turn off the hologram?" he asked.

"I did this to make it easier for you to accept me, do you not want this?" she asked in return.

"It's making it too easy and more difficult." Dib answered. "Seeing you in human form is attractive for me. Plus you wearing that right now, I find it very alluring even. But it's a fantasy, not real and I can't forget what's hiding underneath. You are Irken. That is what's real. I just wanted you to have your disguise working so you'd be safe on Earth. I don't want to bond with a fantasy, Tak. It should be with you."

He took a breath and explained further. "When we're around other Irkens, it makes me nervous. Around here I see your disguise and I remember that it's a fake. That there is an Irken hiding underneath. It's too close to what an Invader does for right now, Tak."

The figure in the blankets nodded, broke up into static and vanished to reveal the Irken form underneath. The tears from her eyes had been hidden by the disguise. "You are uncomfortable being among Irkens, and you need time away from this form. I understand because I feel the same way. You came here to get away from Irkens, as did I. I'll go find another place to be away from them."

Dib really felt like a complete heel now, as what she had said was true. Not that he didn't want her there, but that he hadn't thought about where she would be staying after he accepted her bond. It was only natural that she would be here.

"Don't go." Dib looked down at the purple eyed Irken wearing that light purple nightgown. That Gaz had picked something like this out was clearly a mischievous act to mess with his head. But it made a point very real too. This was his accepted mate who would be by his side for the rest of his life. She deserved to be treated as such. "May I come in?"

Those Irken eyes gave approval, and Dib climbed onto the hammock and slid in with Tak under the blankets. He wiped teardrops from her eyes and enclosed his arms around her to draw her close. "Tak, forgive me when your warrior side is showing and it throws me for a loop. I'm not a fighter like you are. When I saw you broken down on Dirt I forgot that this is a large part of who you are. I want you to recover and heal, to be yourself. Forgive me for my mistakes I'll end up making. I want to be good to you, but I only understand those things on human terms."

Thin green arms intertwined with his own. "Dib," she said softly into his ear. "I am already starting to feel better, more of the person I was before Dirt. At least in brief moments. Being a General for my new homeworld will help me recuperate and gain some of what I lost of myself. But, Dib, I will never the person I was. No matter what I show to others on the outside, a part of me may always be broken. I will always need you, my mate."

Tak turned a bit to face her human, and sent her antennae into his hair. He smiled warmly and leaned his own head into it. It was becoming an enjoyable thing to have her stalks run through his scalp.

"Dib? Can I tell you a secret?" she asked.

"You can confide whatever you need to," he answered.

"I know my PAK is damaged. It may not show up on a scan, but it is. I can tell because I don't want to be among Irkens. I don't want to be counted _as_ Irken. Dib, is it possible to be adopted by another species? To be adopted as human?"

Dib's heart wept for the girl he held in his arms. "Tak, do something for me. Don't hate yourself for being Irken. Don't stop accepting yourself as you are." He brought her hand up to the necklace around his neck as he rubbed his other hand along her side. "I will always accept you, Tak. When we need to get away from the others we do so together. Just like this right now. You and me together in our little nest."

He felt Tak nod her head. Felt her take in a deep breath and let it out. Her body relaxing into her mate's. They stayed like that for a long while.

This felt good. It was so weird, but he liked her antennae exploring and resting in his black hair. Liked the feel of her warm body so close to him. The feel of that silky nightgown softening the feel of bones unnaturally exposed under her green skin, which pained him for her sake. As messed up as the situation, their condition and everything else was, it felt right.

The human slowly sat up and Tak sat up with him. He knew what she needed, and the time felt right. A bit crazy, but what around them wasn't? He reached for his jeans and removed something from a pocket. He then flung the pair of jeans to the floor. Dib turned to face the Irken girl beside him in the blankets.

"Tak, before you woke up today I asked Zim to order something for me back on Earth. It arrived with the rest of the supplies. I don't think you will admit it even to yourself, but I think you are insecure about us. You are at the end of your bonding process with me, and I'm just starting to build one with you. Perhaps you think that since I am, that I could end up rejecting you before I solidify my own bond."

Dib opened the box and set it in his lap. Then he took her left three fingered hand. "Tak, I won't. We humans have a tradition. A promise between two people to become a mated pair when they are ready." He lifted the engagement ring out of the box and held it before the Irken girl. "This is my promise to you, Tak. I won't deny you. I have accepted your bond to me, and I promise I will form one with you that is just as strong. You and I are a bonded pair, and when we get back to Earth you can live with me and my family. You are part of a human family, Tak. My human father and sister are your human father and sister. It does come with a certain Irken brother too, but we are all one family. If Gaz and Zim have smeets we will be their Aunt and Uncle. When I have reached the point in my process, I will arrange for us to be officially recognized mates back on Earth. Tak, this is my promise that one day you will be my official mate as I have become yours. Will you accept my promise?"

Tears were streaming down Tak's cheeks. The last question was kind of dumb to even ask as it was a forgone conclusion, but she guessed it was part of the human tradition. The problem was she didn't know what she was supposed to do. Was she supposed to eat the ring? Make _him_ eat it? Shove it up his nose? What? Then she understood as Dib slid the ring onto her left hand's middle finger. She was to wear it, be reminded of his solemn promise to her every time she looked at it or felt it around her finger.

Dib laid back down in the hammock and drew Tak down with him. She placed her head on his chest and rested her left hand nearby where she could gaze at Dib's promise to her. Dib's arm snaked underneath and behind her so he could hold the Irken girl close, human arm draped below her PAK mounting and its attached five fingered hand resting on her side. Dib pulled the blankets over them and the two settled in, just being together and away from the universe.

After a few hours of occasional murmurs and whispers Dib fell asleep, confident and content with his decision. Happy with they way things turned out.

Tak noted the change in his breathing. She carefully moved to take off the silly glasses and placed them on the PAK support machine sitting on the floor next to her. A ringed finger pressed a button and she returned to her previous position, using Dib as a pillow. Access ports opened as two cables snaked out and plugged into her PAK. Irken purple eyes closed and she fell asleep in the arms of her caring human mate.

* * *

Zim was relaxed on the Membrane's couch with Gaz laying into him. Gir was curled up on the floor watching the movie. It was the first time the robot was allowed over, and was promised a taco-within-a-taco if he remained quiet, still, and did not destroy anything. On the TV was the final scenes of silly humans running and screaming as armor-piercing rounds from nearby tanks bounced harmlessly off of the ridiculously soft skin of a giant tarantula. The old black and white movie was indeed horribly done and probably cost a whole five dollars to film. The actors were so bad that they deserved to be cocooned by the mutant spider. They shared many laughs this evening after the required 'chick flick' (which still made no sense to Zim as the movie never involved flicking chickens).

Zim looked down at Gaz. His view right now was mostly her purple hair, since she seemed content to be using him as a bean bag. But this was very pleasurable to Zim, being close and relaxed with his Gaz-blossom. He was a happy Irken. He had been nearly blissful all evening and into the night. Ever since he had spoken with Dib that afternoon in fact.

There was something special about spending 'quality time' snuggled with his amazing Gaz-blossom, who Zim now knew someday wanted to have a smeet with him. An incredible feeling that Zim didn't really understand. Ending credits ran up the screen and Gaz clicked the remote and dropped it lazily on the floor. Neither moved for a few minutes.

"Gaz-blossom, Zim has a gift for you." he said.

"Really?" Gaz asked, turning a little so she could look at Zim without getting up or letting him get up either.

He took a little package from his PAK. "Zim had noticed something missing about you from these so called 'chicken flicking' movies. Zim has neglected an important human tradition regarding his magnificent bondmate. Is now a good time for you to receive it?" He handed her the package.

Gaz took it and opened the wrapping, halting briefly when it revealed a small box. With nerves quivering, she opened it to see the ring inside. It was no small, minimum priced ring. She took it out and held it up to the light.

It didn't look normal, but then it was from Zim. It wasn't made from the normal gold, silver or platinum, and the dozen very tiny diamonds were arranged in a peculiar way around two somewhat larger ones. All the stones were set inside the band rather than mounted on top. "Zim, care to explain?" she asked.

"It is made of a titanium and gold alloy for damage resistance when you decide to hit objects that are not Zim," he explained to her. "The clear rocks are set inside so they will not fall out on impact."

"And the arrangement?" she inquired. "I don't recognize it."

"That is the shape of a squeedily-spooch," the alien informed her. "Because you always hold Zim's squeedily-spooch in your bloody hands."

It was amazing how Zim could be romantic and disturbing at the same time. Gaz held the wedding ring in her fingers, staring at it for a long while. She returned it to Zim.

Then Gaz held out her left hand to him, with fingers spread wide. "Go ahead, Zim. You're supposed to be the one to put it on." A moment passed. "No, Zim. Put it on _my_ finger." Another moment. "No, the other finger. This one."

Gaz sat up and gazed at her hand, diamond wedding ring sparkling in the living room lights. It was amazing what a tiny hunk of metal could do. They hadn't moved in together or anything crazy like that. Just this one small gesture, yet it made such a big difference to her. It actually felt good to her. Balanced. Gaz felt like she was really married rather than just living with the status of being hitched to Zim.

She looked back and into the pleased solid red eyes of her Irken husband. It still felt weird, but a good weird. Gaz smiled and leaned over, giving Zim a slow, soft but modest kiss on the lips. "Thank you, Zim. You did good."

Zim did not respond for several moments. Rather than burning from the moisture transferred by her kiss, his lips tingled as if the nerve endings were dancing. It was very… satisfying, he decided.

"YAAAYYY!" Gir exclaimed. He began singing. "Master and Mistress sitting in a tree. F-A-R-T-I-N-G."

"GIR!" they both yelled.

"I'm sooooo haaappy!" Gir cooed. "My Master and Mistress lovies each other."

Gaz settled back down into her living cushion and Zim reached around to embrace her. "Yeah, we really do," she said contentedly.

Zim did not want to move, but the movies were over. "Zim does not wish to return to his base. But it is late, and the end of movie night designates Zim's departure."

Gaz did not move. "There is no one else here, Zim. Plus there is no skool tomorrow. You can stay very late tonight. I think it would be okay for the wife to have a late night with her husband." She turned her head to face the robot on the floor. "Gir! Go get Zim some doughnuts from the store!"

"Woohooooo! Dough-nuts!" he loudly proclaimed and climbed out a now open window.

Gaz turned onto her side to face her alien, giving him a naughty look. "Why don't we go up to my room and play a game?" she asked. "Gir can stand guard downstairs when he gets back."

The 'innocent' thinking mate looked into the girl's eyes. "What exactly do you have in mind?"

"This will take most of the night." Gaz reached down and pulled out a game from under the couch. _Monopoly: Juvenile Delinquent Edition._

"YES!" Zim crowed. "Your slumlord housing developments are no match for my arsonist fire truck!"

Gaz grinned happily as she used her free ringed hand to pull Zim up off the couch and guide him upstairs. "Doesn't matter. I can build them by the dozen with cash from my bank robbing get-away car."


	20. Chapter 19

A/N: Again, thanks to EduTorresD, MojaveRuler151, memmek10k, Catgirlfireflare, Zerg170, crazyanimefreak15, guest, Rocketman 131, and DragonMaster 88 88 for your reviews!

Congratulations to crazyanimefreak15 for submitting my 100th review!

Sorry for the delay folks, but I have had a wicked case of writer's block for this particular chapter. Plus my online wing (NMC rules!) went and tried out a new MMO other than BGO. Guess who gets to craft all the new gear since most don't have as much time as I do?

I have gone ahead and re-rated this story as a T just so I don't have think about it anymore. The last chapter of Phase Three: Shock was going to be a definite T anyway.

I also had to resize the CVE _Doomwind._ Found a rather lack of taxi space to move spacecraft around the ship. Previous notations of the dimensions have been edited. It is still about one thousand feet long, but now four hundred feet wide at the stern and three hundred at the bow. The main hull is two hundred feet tall with a central command island above and below the hull by another fifty feet each. Two light energy batteries are forward of the upper island with another behind. Another set runs along the lower island. Point defense turrets (anti-missile/anti-aircraft) are unchanged. Engine compartments and crew spaces run above and below the spacecraft decks, just so you know. Along the port side central plane the spacecraft area layout is below. The starboard layout mirrors this. Total width is 400 ft. The maintenance area only extends halfway up the hull. The bow section only has room for the taxiway (or launch cue parking). Bulkheads section off the large bays for damage control purposes so there is no one large maintenance bay on either side of the ship. I don't know how many. I'll leave some details up to your imagination.

Hanger/Launch bays | Maintenance Parking . Maintenance Taxiway | Landing Deck (100 ft)

For those who expressed interest, yes I actually did make up Monopoly: Juvenile Delinquent Edition rules way back when I was in high school. It really is playable, and because some have expressed interest in this insane version, I have gone back to the CWZ Reference Guide and put in the M:JDE rules at the end. At least the ones I can remember since it was a long time ago.

Guest: Yes I watch Bones and many seasons of NCIS too, so I get those references very well. (Not so much the anime ones. Let's put it this way. I remember when Starblazers was broadcast on Saturday mornings and you actually had to turn the dial to change between all six TV stations!) I get what you say about ranking of Invader vs. Elite. I think both would be equal in the ranking system as they are two different 'career' tracks. Sort of like Navy SEALS vs. Green Berets. Both are Elite, but one may have more 'prestige' than the other (which we also kind of see in IZ Nightmare Begins) and a different mission style. As for the Tak being a bad-booty thing, yes I see what you are saying. I just have a very narrow definition of a BA. A gangbanger would be a bad-booty because of the, uh, lack of a disciplined attitude (or should I say a lack of self-restraint like a rabid dog). A Samurai or Martial Artist would be a kick-booty due to the heavy self-control necessary for being so dangerous, much like Ziva on NCIS. Otherwise they would be a plague on the society they were pledged to defend when they got annoyed or mad. Thanks for the clarification.

I do disagree with Tak's abilities. I don't think they would let just anybody take the Invader test. And someone as determined (or obsessed) as her would not let those skills and abilities atrophy just because she was sent to Dirt the first time. I think she would have made her own little obstacle and training course to keep those skills up. Someone with that much smarts and ability would find a way. As for the Invader test, I think that it could also be a final test after training was done to see if they passed rather than an entrance exam. It was never specified in the show which it was (It could be translated either way I think). Sort of like how someone can sit in a college class, do the work and everything, but skip the final test to get the piece of paper that says you know what was learned. I may go back and alter a word or two to indicate that this was the case later on.

And thanks for saying that this fanfic is unique and one-of-a-kind. I can't think of a higher complement than by what you have stated. Much appreciated, and totally with you on the whole DATR fics thing being loaded with 'mushy-unicorns-and-glitter' stuff or far to the other side of being a bad-booty. But it is very difficult to find balance between the two opposing aspects. I find even quite a few ZAGRs make Gaz too much a bad-booty punk (see above statement) rather than just a kick-booty or loaded with love-triangles (oh how I _loathe_ those triangles) which I _totally_ disagree with and Zim falling in love human-style (he is an alien after all). That is why I made up the bonding thing. For Irkens I made it take place on a more neurological and instinctive level (primitive) rather than based largely on compound emotions and mental processes like humans (complex).

I wouldn't classify Tak as being 'soft' but more 'weakened.' Along the line of being broken down physically and psychologically. I've tried to keep in mind accounts of how holocaust/reeducation camp survivors were impacted by their experience until they could rebuild themselves. But yes she does have a soft spot regarding Dib now. Her brain was permanently altered where he is concerned.

Again, thanks for your review. Depth of input is very enlightening and helpful for me, even if I disagree on some points a reader/writer may bring up. As for chatting on facebook, I'm up for that. But I would suggest you PM me. I don't know if you can do that without a fanfiction account or not. I have a facebook account, but have never used it.

* * *

It was rather early Sunday morning and Zim was in his kitchen packing a lunch into a backpack when the next call came in. Gaz was still back at the Membrane residence sleeping from their late night playing the board game after the movies. The alien had promised his human bondmate that he would take her out for a Gir-free lunch after she had allowed the robot to accompany them on their movie night.

"Master," Computer called. "I have a transmission coming in from General Tak."

Zim sighed as he carefully used a pair of tongs to place a gross piece of sliced ham onto the pile that was making up Gaz's sandwich. He dropped the slice of meat onto the forming sandwich and flipped his safety face shield up over his head. "Very well, Computer. Route it through to my Pad. If Zim leaves this unattended, Gir will eat all the ingredients." He pulled his Pad out of his PAK and set it in front of him on the kitchen table.

Tak's image appeared on the small display. "Zim," she grumbled. "I have some data- What the _hell_ are you making? Is that MEAT?"

"Yes. Yes it is." Zim pulled his face shield back down and picked up his tongs once more. "It is a revolting Slaughtered Pig sandwich for my Gaz-blossom."

The image of Tak turned away, averting her eyes from her own display. "You planned this, didn't you. Don't you know what I had to do to survive on Dirt? How I had to ingest meat to keep from starving?" She put up a hand to block the sight of Zim making the sandwich. It was making her nauseous and bringing back bad memories.

Zim put the tongs down and removed the face shield. He could feel some shred of sympathy. He well knew from his own past experiences just how painful and damaging meat could be just having it slapped on his skin. But having to _ingest_ it? Have that pain and burning _inside_ oneself? Over and over for years?

"How would I have planned this? You are the one who called me." He picked up the Pad in a rare display of compassion so Tak would not have to look at meat products. "Yes, it is barbaric and gross. But it is part of the human's diet." He sighed again. "The things we will do for our human mates…" Zim left the rest unsaid.

Tak took a peek at her display, and seeing the meat was no longer in view put her hand down. Then she nodded to indicate her own understanding. "At least _my_ mate will not ask me to make him a meat dish. Or try to make me look at it."

"Perhaps, but Zim hears that you will be living with both your mate and my own. Zim would suggest you avoid the kitchen area and our mates when they are feeding. The human diet requires living things as nourishment, whether it be plant or meat based. If they were to subsist on a more proper Irken diet they would quickly get unhealthy, bloated and ugly. You are going to have to make some accommodation for them."

The female Irken only nodded with sad understanding. "I know Dib would try to shield me from such things forever. He is a good mate, but I will have to overcome this eventually." She thought for a moment. "Zim? What do you mean that they would _get_ ugly? Our mates are human. Does that mean that you don't…" Tak let the sentence hang in the air.

Zim didn't respond immediately. "Zim still finds the humans to be hideous. But my Gaz-blossom has become beautiful to me. While when she is in her costume she has a certain appeal, Zim would not wish her to have been Irken. You?"

Tak nodded her head. "I like my human just the way he is, too. I wouldn't change a thing about him."

"Looks like we both are sick deviants," Zim commented with a slightest of chuckles. He still didn't like Tak, nor put a whole lot of trust in her, but they had something in common now. Plus as Gaz would say, they were family. A pleased Gaz meant a contented Zim. "So. Did you actually have a reason to call the last person you would ever want to speak to or did you just want to compare notes on having mates?"

Tak actually flushed a bit at that. "No. I mean yes. I did. I am largely immobile right now and I need something to do. I have some beginning thoughts for this ship and the first steps on defending our new home, but I need more information on resources available. Dib has given me some Earth titles to look through, starting with _Jane's All the World's Aircraft, the World's Ships,_ and so on. Apparently this Jane has a substantial database of defense equipment, but I need it routed through your computer to gain access to Earth's information network. In return Dib wants to be able to speak with his own contacts while we are up here."

Zim slapped his hand to his face. Tak grinned. Zim had been unsuccessfully searching for information on Earth's defenses for years and come up empty, and here Dib just pointed out a few internet library books for her. Not that they dealt with a lot of classified material, but it was a good starting point.

"Zim supposes that this will be fair, but Computer will have to monitor the transmission in order to transfer the data stream to and from the Earth network. It won't be private."

"What's the matter? Don't trust us, Governor Defect?"

"Not really, General Reject. Your mate has spent half his life trying to expose Zim."

Tak's expression turned angry. "That has affected my Dib too, and all of this has not been easy for him. He's honestly trying to do better about adjusting. He is attempting to teach this crew about adapting to life on Earth. He has willingly not just accepted an Irken as his sibling's bondmate, but an Irken as his own as well. I didn't force Dib to accept my bond, you know." She showed Zim the engagement ring on the middle of her three fingers. "I didn't even ask him to. Dib _chose_ me to be his mate, even though he has not bonded yet and he knows this is for life. He doesn't even want me to use my human disguise! We share quarters, even our bedding."

"Fine, whatever," Zim said. He knew that she was defending her mate just like he would stick up for Gaz, not that _she_ needed it. But what Tak was saying was the truth. "You can have routing access. I have better things to do than listen to how 'great' Dib is, so if there is nothing else?"

"That is all for now. I have a lot of research to do and Dib has calls to make."

"Oh, just so you know, Tak. When you show off your ring you're supposed to hold up all your fingers. Not just the one," Zim advised.

Tak smirked. "I know that," was all she said as she cut the connection.

Had Zim had hair, he would have pulled some out about now. Instead he took it out on the block of ham.

* * *

Dib sat at a small terminal in his quarters aboard the _Doomwind_. Tak was laying in their hammock studying off of her Pad. He took several deep breaths.

"Anxious?" Tak asked.

Dib just nodded. Tak looked over at him. "Dib, you know you have to eventually. Zim did give you the transmission frequencies for the other major galactic powers. There is so much more than only four people can handle, even with this ship's crew helping. We need allies among your kind."

"I know," Dib sighed. "But now I have to worry about how this will impact my family. That includes you too, Tak. I never imagined there would ever be a day I'd have to be concerned about protecting Irkens from humans."

Tak got up and limped over to stand next to him. A ringed three fingered hand reached over and placed itself on Dib's shoulder. Then the Irken moved to the side and out of camera view. Dib looked at her, then used the computer terminal to access the Swollen Eyeball Network protocols stored in Tak's ship. Then he typed in the transmit command. The SEN wallpaper and interface came up after a few minutes. He was routing through at least four different systems, running firewalls and security programs so it took awhile to achieve a connection. Dib entered new commands and a new message flashed up on the display. _Connecting…_

A few moments later a dark silhouette with spiked hair appeared. "Agent Mothman? What do you want? It's Sunday morning for Pete's sake! This had better not be about that jacklope den you think you found because that could wait," a feminine voice said.

"Agent Tunaghost," Dib greeted the other agent. "No, I scrapped the jackalope case. Something else came up. I mean really, really major. I should really be talking to Agent Darkbootie, but I'm concerned. I wanted to run some things past you first. I really could use some backup on this if I talk to the others. If things don't go well, my family might be at risk."

"Well that certainly got my attention, Agent Mothman," Tunaghost stated. She had always been fairly supportive of Dib's efforts within the SEN. Most of the others saw him as either a joke or an annoyance. Agent Darkbootie was technically his mentor, sort of. But Tunaghost was his ally and perhaps close to a friend within the Swollen Eyeballs. She was usually long-suffering of Dib's well meaning intentions. "Let me guess. Alien invasion, right?"

"No. Just the opposite in fact," Dib informed her. "This is all off the record. I mean _really_ off the record. So turn off your recorders."

A moment went by. "Go ahead," Tunaghost said.

"And the old recalled VCR drive you have spliced into your system that no one is supposed to know about," insisted Dib.

There was a tilt of the head by the silhouette on the display. "Okay, Mothman. By the way, what is with the lag? You connection time is awful right now."

"That's because I'm running through at least four different computer systems and who knows how many relays just to get to my Internet Provider."

"Being a bit paranoid today, aren't you?" Tunaghost asked.

"I have reason to be, plus I'm very far away. You won't believe how far."

"Fine. I haven't had breakfast yet, so can we get on with this?"

"Okay. You remember that alien Zim I'm always going on about?" There was a nod. "That alien race that is going around invading everybody? Well, he's one of them as you remember. Well, Earth is now a Protectorate of the Irken Empire and Zim is the hand's off Governor tasked with external system defense."

"That's pretty weak, Mothman. Earth doesn't get invaded by aliens every day. You have actual proof of your claims?" she asked skeptically.

"Yes, but I can't give it out."

"Big surprise there. I still don't see why you are talking to me about this," Tunaghost commented.

"Because I need to know my family will be safe," Dib stated forcefully.

"If this is serious I'm sure the other agents could help with things."

"You don't understand," Dib told the agent. "I'm concerned about _them_ coming after my family."

There was a long pause. A very long pause. "Either this is really huge or you have finally lost it," Tunaghost said. "Why would the SEN do something like that?"

"To start with, I'm not on Earth," Dib stated flatly. "I'm orbiting the Irken homeworld in a spacecraft carrier bought for Earth service from a salvage yard. If the SEN goes after the appointed Irken Governor right after Earth gets Protectorate status from an Empire that's invading everybody else, what do you think is going to happen? Since I'm out here I couldn't step in right away. You know we've been trying to get proof of alien life for decades, as well as any knowledge about them."

"Wow. Mothman, you sure don't disappoint," Tunaghost said. "Sounds like you've really gone off the deep end. But I still don't see what this has to do with your family or the personal concern."

"First swear to me that you will tell no one without my express permission. That you will take this to your grave if I need you to," Dib insisted. "And drop the anonymity filter."

There was a nod. "Alright, but this had better be worth it. This is so far beyond acceptable protocol," came a grumbled response. "If it isn't, I'll hack your records and make you a wanted felon. And I mean public enemy number one. Wanted dead or dead, you get me?"

Dib agreed, dropping his own anonymity filter program first. The dark silhouette on his display was replaced by an older college girl. She appeared to be one of those students that were deliberately seniors for more than one year in a row.

Dib took a breath. "That alien Zim and my sister got married. She was given the title of Lady by the Irken leadership. They might have kids someday." He knew he sounded completely insane. Dib reached out a hand, and a three fingered hand took it. He drew his Irken bondmate into the camera view. There was a gasp over the communications link. "And this is Tak. Out here she's considered my, uh, wife. But on Earth she'd be my fiancée. Tak has had it pretty bad for a long time, and is looking for a new homeworld to belong to."

Agent Tunaghost did not say or move for a very long time. When she did respond, it wasn't anything like Dib had expected. "Oh thank God!"

Dib did not know what to make of this.

Tunaghost went on. "Dib, you have any idea what a relief this is to _me_? I mean come on, if the SEN knew of an alien looking for a human concubine to seal a deal with Earth, who do you think the SEN would assign to the job? You're the biggest alien pursuer in the SEN, and I'm the only female in our section. Plus all the other agents are really ugly. I mean face in the garbage disposal ugly. Why do you _really_ think we have the anonymity filters in our communications? It's so we don't have to _look_ at each other."

Dib was of course flabbergasted. Tunaghost continued on. "But I see why you are so concerned about your family. Dang, Mothman. When you drop a bombshell, you really drop one. Yes, I'll back you up on this all the way because it means I don't have to ever be in your shoes. But Darkbootie will want something as a sign of good faith. Something concrete. After that he'll be able to arrange all the documentation you need. Full papers and completely legitimate ones."

"Zim gave me frequencies of major powers out here that can stand up to the Irkens to share with the SEN as an offering. We can eventually listen in on what is going on out there, but we need to use it discreetly. It would look bad if we seemed like we had aligned ourselves with Irken enemies. I also have a little video and gun camera footage of the Planets Dirt and Irk as well as the Irken Armada itself."

Dib looked at Tak. She tapped her Pad and opened some technical files, transferring copies to the terminal. "Agent Tunaghost," she said. "These are technical specifications and the basic working principles behind several of the spare parts and minor operating components used by this vessel. It would be good if we were not dependent on outside sources for these more frequent maintenance supplies. The technology comes from a non-Irken source. All are hopelessly obsolete by Irken standards and found only in salvage yards now. However they are very advanced compared to what Earth has. Tactical systems are not included of course. That is _my_ department." She pressed a button and started the upload when Tunaghost plugged a flash drive into her system.

Agent Tunaghost acknowledged the alien. "Fair enough. I will talk to Agent Darkbootie and work something out. But with all this you have given me, if it checks out, I see him playing ball."

"You do understand that Zim gave us this as a two-way deal? Not shared with anyone else?" Dib made sure of that awareness. "As an ally? There is a lot going on out there, but it's more than he can deal with by himself. We may be a Protectorate, but that just means we won't get invaded by the Irkens. I really get the impression that otherwise we're on our own."

"No sweat," Tunaghost said. "I know our signal intelligence crew will love to keep those SETI nutjobs in the dark forever. They hate each other and would do it just be able to point and laugh and keep the SETI pranks going. Last week they bounced a list of ketchup ingredients off of Neptune."

Tak spoke again. "Agent Tunaghost. My bondmate is serious about leaving his family circle alone. Governor Zim and Lady Gaz have a personal guard. They are not former soldiers, but made up of low class workers that were also expelled from Irken society. But if their Taller is threatened, they are programmed to not respond well. In fact that is why they were expelled, for defending the human against vulgar speech of Irken guards. They are the ones currently running this carrier. They look solely to Gaz and answer only to Zim by extension of their bond. They are _extremely_ loyal to Dib's sister and it would be most unwise to tamper with that."

Tunaghost gulped at the directness of Tak's advice. The purple eyed Irken went on with a more understated tone. "You must understand what exactly you are dealing with. Zim and the human Gaz are bonded as I am bonded to my Dib. There are only a few hundred bonded pairs within the entire Irken civilization. They are so rare that for Irkens, to knowingly cause harm to one would be like deliberately annihilating an entire city of your planet. An atrocity that requires a response. It is not a wish nor a desire. I just want to come home with my mate. These others only wish to serve Lady Gaz and defend your world if ever needed. But we are still Irken."

"I will make sure Darkbootie understands the need for certain arrangements and guarantees from us. I won't go into what we've discussed here, but he will probably require some debriefing of the situation before getting anyone else involved. So try not to worry so much Dib. I'd cover you just because getting saddled with an ugly alien husband is the _last _thing I want for myself."

Agent Tunaghost signed off in good faith. Of course her expression was along the lines of _better you hitched than me_.

Tak looked at Dib, ran her antennae through his hair once and went back to her own research. While most of what she found was lacking, there were a few things that she felt had some potential as a starting point. All Dib could do right now was wait for a response. He did try not to worry, but home was a long way away.

* * *

Zim showed up in front of the Membrane house in his Voot Cruiser at lunch time. Gaz was waiting by the curb. She eyed him with a suspicious expression as she climbed in after he opened the canopy.

"What's with the Cruiser?" she asked after she had belted in. "I thought we were going to go out for lunch."

Zim smiled at her. "Oh, we are."

Gaz crossed her arms. "So where are we going?"

He was still smiling. "It's a surprise."

"You had better not be taking me to some cliché place like Paris," she said. "If that is your plan I'll stop fast-forwarding through the mushy scenes on movie night and play them frame-by-frame."

Zim merely handed her his GameSlave 4 that he had obtained for the CWZ convention project. "Play your game until we get there and no peeking."

Gaz took the GameSlave with a bit of a huff and quickly lost herself in the zone.

After an unrealized amount of time Zim tapped her arm. Gaz powered down the GameSlave and looked out of the canopy. The view took her breath away. There before them was Saturn. They were slightly below the ecliptic with a view of the rings. The gas giant's shadow from the sun stretched across and just barely touched the edge of the outer rings. The 'surface' seemed bland, yet there were subtle traces of color with the cloud layers. It was a picturesque scene no artist or photo could duplicate, and no human had ever before seen this view with the naked eye.

She was no space junkie, but the rings of Saturn had a way of capturing the human mind in ways no one was ever able to put into words. Really, it looked like a dirty ball of gas surrounded by a hollow disk. Yet there was something about it…

Zim watched his bondmate, then silently gestured for her to wait. He piloted the Voot Cruiser far behind the planet and took a position that put the planet directly in front of the sun. Gaz sharply inhaled as the view of the planet unexpectedly changed. All of a sudden the whole planetary system lit up in sunlight. The rings seemed to glow with an electric aura. Sunlight seemed to wrap around the planet to touch the night side as light was reflected off of the rings to the cloud cover below. As if hands made of light were hugging the planet.

There was only a single spot in the entire solar system for this view. At any other angle the indirect light reflecting off of the night side would be lost in the far more powerful direct lighting of the sun illuminating the planet. Gaz just looked out onto the greatest work of art in the solar system in awe. This made the previous view look lame in comparison.

Zim smiled and handed her a sandwich, which she slowly ate absent-mindedly. He munched on his own snacks. Computer had been instructed to hold all calls while babysitting Gir. After they were finished eating he offered an arm and Gaz settled into it, leaning into Zim with her head resting on his shoulder. He leaned his own head onto hers as they enjoyed the quiet break from the demands of the universe. They didn't speak for sound would ruin the moment.

For Zim these were totally new experiences. But the alien found them something to be treasured, these little moments of doing nothing for some mission. His entire previous life and focus had been all about a mission for some Taller or the Tallest, but that life was gone and he didn't regret it. As he looked down onto his human wife captivated by the sight before them, he realized he was looking at his purpose in life. He had a 'mission' he would choose to pursue, yes. But Gaz was his purpose now, not some mission, and she alone had proven worthy of his devotion.

He reached up and ran a free clawed hand gently through her hair. In the past Zim had thought that hair was a stupid feature for humans to have, but he was beginning to find some interesting things about it. There was a certain pleasure in grooming one's bondmate. Zim knew that they were really just starting to explore this 'married life,' but from what he could tell it promised many good things.

"Zim! You're claws are distracting me," Gaz growled.

_Of course exploring this could be like exploring a mine field too._

Zim stopped, and brought his hand back down and held Gaz's hand. She took her gaze away from the majestic sight of Saturn and into the solid red eyes of her Irken husband. Those eyes looked as if made of liquid warmth, as if they would melt at any moment.

Gaz heart melted too. It was true Irkens did not love in the way humans did. They simply did not have the emotional complexity to take all the simpler emotions, motivations, and mental states that made up human love and turn it into a single compound state. They had all the pieces, but couldn't take the final step to converting it in their mindset into a single whole. But they could wrap it together in a single focus. Like taking hundreds of individual threads and wrapping it into a woven rope.

Human complexity could be a wonderful thing, but it had its drawbacks. It was complicated, full of choices, decisions, paths to take. A person could fall in and out of human love. Other priorities could distract or draw away without realization or intention. But Irkens were emotionally simple. And that simplicity gave them (especially Zim) something that few humans could handle and remain emotionally healthy. Intense focus in one's life. You were an enemy or you were not. You liked or disliked. You were bonded or not bonded. And bonding was like a tightening of the individual threads that made up a rope made of Kevlar. As those threads became more dense, a rope could develop greater resilience than a solid steel bar.

Just as one could not compare a fabric rope to steel, one could not compare Human and Irken 'love'. Somehow Gaz could see it in Zim's eyes. He was bonded to her forever, even if it wasn't in the final stage yet. There literally could be no other way for him. No interest or job could compete with her. Direct orders, torture, not even death itself could take that bond away. The only response Zim could have facing threats or coercion would be to counter-attack. He could not weaken in his resolve to her. He could only defeat them or die trying.

If given a choice between the two, Human or Irken love, Gaz knew which she desired. The developing and unbreakable Irken love of her husband.

Gaz nestled closer into her spouse as she turned her attention back to the artistry that was Saturn behind sunlight. "Zim?" she asked quietly so as not to disturb the setting. "If you wish to brush through my hair, I'd like you to use your antennae."

As the couple took in the sight, Gaz of Saturn and Zim of is far more amazing wife, he tilted his head until it rested with Gaz's and began grooming her hair with his antennae. Innocent, yet intimate. Zim began to purr at their closeness and Gaz joined in with an occasional sigh, luxuriating in his attention.

"I love you, Zim." Gaz stroked his face absently with her hand wearing their wedding ring.

"Zim loves you too."

_Yes,_ they both thought. _This 'married life' holds out wonderful promises._

After another hour it was unfortunately time to get back to their everyday life. They both groaned as they strapped back in and Zim piloted back to Earth.

"Zim. You can really throw an impressive picnic for a girl, you know that?" Gaz commented lazily.

"No, Zim can't." the alien said. "Only for my wife."

* * *

It was now evening, and Gaz was sitting in her Gaming Den within Zim's base watching multiple screens of data flow past. As they approached Earth during late afternoon, Computer had given them an update on his latest experiment. When they arrived back at Zim's base they had gone into an awaiting conference call with Tak, Dib, Beed and Lim.

Computer had yielded surprising results, for who would have thought that Earth honey would be like caviar to Irkens? Gaz could have sworn that she could see Computer's metaphoric hands wringing in capitalistic glee as he transferred a large amount of his stashed Earth funds to buy up several wholesale honey companies in China, which he had sent instructions to expand as rapidly as possible. Eventually Logistic Specialist Roz could be making runs to Earth to ship nearly a ton of honey to Irken snack bars daily.

In Computer's financial terms, buying one ton of Earth honey for three thousand dollars yielded the equivalent of eight _hundred_ thousand dollars in galactic monies using prices reflected in the delicacies market. Eventually that could be per _day_. Which could also be used to purchase major parts from salvage yards or from orbital factories that dealt to non-military clients. Foodcourtia, for example, had a large food delivery fleet to maintain. And since everything bought would be 'civilian grade' it would all be legit if the Irken military checked up on it. Not that anyone would as long as they didn't start buying weapons.

This had sent Tak into a research and design spree. Zim naturally went into one of his own. He wasn't the Jack-of-all-Trades designer Tak was, but if you needed a fusion cannon for an orbital weapons platform and only had bunny rabbits on hand, Zim was the Irken to go to.

And of course, Computer naturally pointed out, some of those 'civilian grade' systems could be sold to Earth development teams, such competitors to the Membrane Labs, for millions. Dib naturally objected to this. He was a Membrane after all.

So as Zim and Tak competed with each other, she left the computer lab and used her Gaming Den for the rest of the conference call. Beed and Lim were glad to talk with their Taller and were looking forward to no longer being separated from whom they saw as their rightful Taller. That was understandable, given that they were a Governor's Own unit. They updated Gaz on the progress of the logistics, that _Doomwind_ was ready to depart at anytime, and that the crew was in good spirits but a bit anxious about living on an alien planet.

They did gripe a bit about some training schedules Tak had also proposed to them earlier in the day. But Gaz told them it would be good for them as they had not received any real training since they were smeets and found to be unacceptably short. They didn't gripe after that and completely accepted it. Lady Gaz had spoken. Of course they would work around the loading schedule and orientation classes. Training would continue on Earth led by General Tak.

Then Lim relayed a question one of the Irken crew had brought up. If they were a Governor's Own unit for a human on her native world, would they need new uniforms? They weren't really in Irken service anymore, but were an independent Governor's unit. Most Governors liked to play dress-up with their guards, not that they would call it that.

Gaz had agreed to come up with something and had finally chosen mottled gray fatigues for their uniforms and light gray for the Spittle Runners and other vehicles. This would help them blend in more on Earth as they went about their duties. Of course she had yet to figure out what those duties would be, but that could wait another week or two when they arrived and unloaded the supplies into the new base.

She was finishing up designs for unit patches as she spoke with Dib. There was no video right now as her Gaming Den hadn't been rigged for it yet. Tak and Zim were on another channel, with him located in the computer lab. Beed and Lim had left the conference call to return to their logistics work.

"Are they still at it?" she asked into her headset. Gaz was finishing up her design. It was the only enjoyable aspect of their return to Earth. She had always liked to draw, but in the past would prefer to lose herself in her games.

"Yes, they are," Dib's voice answered. "I can hear Tak yelling in the next compartment. Something about brainworms. Can we get back to this agreement with the Swollen Eyeballs? Agent Tunaghost and I spent all afternoon negotiating with Agent Darkbootie in their behalf. They are your responsibility, Gaz."

"I know, I know," Gaz replied sourly. "I just hate getting involved in this cloak-and-dagger stuff. I just want a good normal life with Zim like we had this afternoon."

"Really? What did you do?" Dib asked.

"Zim took me on a romantic picnic behind Saturn. The view was breathtaking."

Dib's voice began laughing.

"What's so funny?" she asked.

"A few things. I just can't imagine Zim being civil, let alone romantic. Plus you just said you wanted a good normal life and yet you went to another planet for an outer space picnic with your alien husband inside an alien spaceship. That is about as far from normal as you can get."

Gaz couldn't help but smile, mostly from the pleasurable memory. "Yeah," she sighed. "How are you and Tak doing?"

"We're still adjusting. Her General persona has been coming out during her projects. She's good, smart, and very capable. I have to admit it's unnerving seeing her when she's got her Irken General gears going. But then she gets back into the present and lets her shields down. I can already see a pattern emerging, and I think she's trying to push herself too hard to recover. I already know I'm going to have to give her a bath when she's done with Zim. I think a part of her kind of goes back to when I rescued her from Dirt. Some sort of need for her to find relief after built up stress and being bathed is the only way she knows how to experience it if the stress levels get too high. And judging from the volume in the next compartment, it's going to be high tonight."

"Sorry to hear that," Gaz related to her brother. "Tak really means something to you, doesn't she?"

"Yes, she does." Gaz could hear the sad compassion in his voice. "She needs me. But I'm going to be coming to terms with this for a while."

Gaz actually felt sorry for her brother. It was just recently that she was in the same position. It seemed like half a lifetime ago, but it was only a few weeks since her first mentioned the CWZ convention to Zim. Her whole life had changed so rapidly since then.

"Dib," she said, verbally putting a hand on his absent shoulder. "The hardest part for me was accepting my being bonded with another species. And the fact that it was Zim of all people. But you'd be surprised how quickly you can adjust if you let yourself just accept reality. I had to talk with someone who helped me at first. Dib, you have always been accepting of the paranormal. You are naturally geared for this sort of life. Far more than I was when I first started down this road."

Gaz took a deep breath and let it out after that admission. "Don't be afraid to let yourself love an Irken. She is the one person who literally can not betray you. Who will stand with you no matter what. Let yourself be her purpose in life. They need that because I think it's the way they are wired. So they keep a single focus as their mission. It's worth it, Dib. Just be your stupid self and let yourself fall in love with Tak when you're ready. I would have never imagined it, but I don't want to be with anyone but Zim."

"Thanks," Dib said in return. It was probably the first time Gaz had shown any sympathy toward him or even wanted to help with his troubles. "I promised her we would get married on Earth when I was ready. Gave her an engagement ring and everything."

Gaz smiled, looking at the wedding ring on her own finger. "Trust me, Dib. There is nothing like falling in love with your spouse."

"You're falling for Zim?" he asked with a touch of the old I-hate-Zim showing.

"After today's picnic? Yes I am."

There was an awkward silence. Gaz spoke again. "He packed me a ham sandwich and made me promise not to peek outside. I thought we were going to someplace cheesy like Paris, but he took me out behind Saturn! It must be the most amazing view in the whole solar system! After I told him to stop running his claws through my hair I looked in his eyes and saw what he feels for me. I realized then… Oh gosh, listen to me! I'm going all mushy."

Gaz switched tracks and gave her brother some sisterly advice. "Dib, I know you don't get it yet, but you will someday. You may not notice at first, but there will be a moment when everything comes together and you realize you are falling for her. And you won't want it to be any other way. I'll give you the advice that was given me. Let it happen naturally, don't fight it and don't force it. I can tell you it will be worth it. Now before I puke from all this girly talk with my _brother_, tell me about the deal with your friends."

"Right," Dib said quickly. "Agent Darkbootie wanted to debrief every Irken coming to Earth, but I told him that you would never permit that. So we've settled on a private and encrypted debriefing with Tak tomorrow. First as a General representing your people, then a personal one about her time on Dirt and… other things. "Gaz could hear her brother blushing. "He's agreed to represent the SEN as a whole, so anything we agree on is binding by the whole community. Plus we don't really have an enforcer unit or anything like that. Most of them are investigators, scientists and other people who spend their time seeking answers to questions. Apparently that's been a bit of a concern, really. We don't have a strong arm, so to speak. Not like what you could represent. I was the worst of them, back when I wanted to nab Zim. A few individuals could be inclined, but would abide by the agreement. Gaz, the SEN are investigators, not fighters. They might be open to an association."

He kept going. "Zim has to turn over or destroy all his weapons of mass destruction and I have to watch him do so. I've also been assigned as an observer since I'm with Tak anyway and she's on the 'human' side so to speak. Your side stays autonomous, and as long as Zim behaves we all will be left alone. Zim and Tak can be given citizenship as political refugees."

"Whatever," Gaz said, very unimpressed, reading data off of one of her displays. "Zim married me, so he's already a citizen. You're getting married eventually, so the same will apply to Tak. I really don't see why we need them to hack records. Officially Zim is from Irkenstan and is part of a ranking family on a student exchange program. Computer had years to put that together. Tak can have something similar. I don't see us as being offered anything we don't already have."

She heard a sigh. "Gaz, I'm sending you some video. Have computer play it for you."

Gaz grunted an acceptance and instructed Computer to do so. An image began to play in to center display. A long slender form began to grow in the starlight. As it grew bigger and bigger, Gaz took in a breath.

"Gaz, this is the _Doomwind_. As you can see, it is _not_ some rusted out piece of salvage." As he spoke, she saw the video of her Irken Guard's Spittle Runners approach as launching ports opened and they began to back inside their hangers. Point defence turrets were visible as well as sensor arrays and communications clusters. The superstructure island rose amidships over the view of the upper armored deck. Three armored energy weapon turrets were visible fore and aft of the island. As the video went on, trailing another Spittle Runner into the landing pattern while hearing a weakened Tak and a compassionate Dib speak in hushed tones in the background, she saw the central island also dropped below the lower hull as well. She watched the approach and landing, then the view from inside Tak's ship as they were pulled inside to the maintenance bay.

Dib went on. "You don't realize what you've got up here. This is a serious warship you've acquired, Gaz. There are thirty Irken space superiority interceptors on board, with about one hundred thirty Irkens as crew. I hear you could get more if you wanted. They've got another four assault shuttles parked somewhere, and enough armored infantry gear for a whole company. All to protect _you_. All answering to you and secondarily to Zim, but just as part of their job."

Gaz didn't say anything. She couldn't.

"Gaz, you have your own personal _military_. Plus you could build up a lot more before departing. A lot of _countries_ couldn't match you right now in a fight. The SEN would be very nervous if they knew what you had, but so far I've just kept this between us and Agents Tunaghost and Darkbootie. Agent Darkbootie can see an opportunity here as well. You could push a system defense project from not even started to a century ahead in a single day."

"Computer?" Gaz called.

"Yes, Mistress?"

"Do you have the security footage of when Zim and I learned about me having an Irken guard? When we were fixing the Walker?" Computer confirmed this. "Make a copy of that whole conversation from when I first answered the call. Send it to Dib to give to this Darkbootie."

"Sending now."

"Okay, Dib. That will cure anyone of thinking I want to take anything over. Or Zim for that matter. What else do you have?" Gaz asked her brother.

"Darkbootie could be interested in an association. We're set up for covert surveillance and information gathering, but not much else. We know it. You are assigned to defend our planet from alien attack and have the first step making that happen."

"I'm not giving them our ship. I'm not turning in my people, and I'm not-"

"Gaz. Hold up a minute."

Gaz glared into her displays even though Dib couldn't see her. Dib continued. "They could help, Gaz. Agent Darkbootie already sent ahead the peace offering Zim gave me and it checks out. But I've pointed out something no one else seems to have thought of. The Irkens are on the warpath with just about everybody but us. Earth being a protectorate keeps us out of the Irken's path, but what about everybody _else_? We're really the only part of Irken territory that is isolated and unguarded. Or on the other side of the coin, what happens when people find out that Earth is the only safe place to go where the Irkens won't attack? I know I'm an alarmist, but it brings up possibilities that can't be ignored."

Gaz dropped her head. She had started all of this when she slapped that necklace on Zim, thinking it was a slave collar.

"I get the picture, Dib. We're too far out for most of that. Practically no one has ever heard of us, let alone where we are. Dib, we are literally off of the map. But just what does the SEN offer? And I mean really."

Dib hesitated a moment. "Gaz, this ship needs replacement parts, supplies, fuel and so on. It needs a crew of at least six hundred to operate at its full potential. Probably more if Tak gets her way with her proposal to Zim. That's what they are arguing about now. How are you going to do that? The SEN can't do much actively, but can point in the right directions. They can find reliable and trustworthy people for you to bring in. They can grease the wheels in legal transactions so you don't have to risk illegal hacks and stealing major components like Zim would do."

"You mean slip their people in?" Gaz asked suspiciously. Dib was the only member of the SEN she knew of, and she remembered the early years of Dib trying to capture Zim for 'study.' She had one hundred and thirty one Irkens to watch out for. One of them was her husband. "I remember how much you and yours wanted an alien to, quote unquote, study."

"Gaz," Dib said. There was a long pause. "I guess I deserved that. I'm trying here. Trying to be fair. I'm worried about my family too, Gaz. I've made that abundantly clear. I'm bonded with an Irken too, remember? I couldn't let them take Tak. Not in a million years. I'm looking out for my _whole_ family, Gaz. I am taking precautions in this."

Dib cleared his throat, and got his mind back on track. "Listen Gaz. They would just be making suggestions. People with the right background, who are qualified for this sort of work and who are open-minded enough to work with off-worlders. Plus smart enough not to open their mouth about it. Can you do that on a large scale? What about when you reach a point where Zim and Tak start building more ships? As for any SEN members, they would be onboard openly by invitation to learn about duplicating the ship's main systems. Darkbootie is interested in propulsion, others are interested in communications, life support, metallurgy, power generation and so on. They know trust has to be earned. We've agreed that they be given an escort while with your people. They won't be stampeding to your door making demands. I will be the official liaison between the SEN and our family. This is becoming a family business and they recognize that. And Tak made it very clear that messing with our family would cause the Irkens to be very, very upset."

"Anyway, that is all long term stuff," Dib went on. "Right now Agent Darkbootie presented Tak with his own peace offering. She's trying to convince Zim right now to allow Computer to complete the transaction and for Zim to start collecting them."

"Collect what exactly?" she asked.

"Four AV-8b Harrier VTOL fighters and two A-10 Warthog attack aircraft. They are just sitting out in the desert because they are considered too worn out for further service. They're just empty shells, but Tak has some ideas she wants to experiment with. Roz would deliver the first upgrade components using civilian parts and Computer says he probably could repair the airframes at the new base with some of his high tech welding and epoxy sprays. Zim is just being Zim."

Gaz shook her head. "You lost me. What does Tak expect to do with them when their finished?"

Dib tried to explain again. "She wants try to convert some Harriers and Warhogs for spacecraft carrier duty. She says those are preferred for conversion for both space and atmospheric maneuvering, easily obtainable since most governments are phasing them out of service, and fitting in with the 'locals' as they are technically Earth aircraft."

Gaz looked down at the almost finished unit patch to transmit to Beed. _Gosh_, she thought to herself. _Tonight is a skool night too._

"Dib, I don't want a bunch on strangers on my ship."

"I know, but you will one day need a full crew, and you can't bring in thousands of Irkens. Just this hundred would make those who know a bit nervous. But if they are working with humans it would help with things. If you went and found yourself a non-Irken Captain for the ship, what would go along way."

Gaz wanted to either puke or crunch in someone's skull. She never wanted to get involved, let alone deal with _politics._

Dib just wouldn't stop talking. "Anyway that's all probably a year or so down the road. Right now we're just getting the initial things ironed out."

"Dib, shut up. I hate this crap. At least with my Irkens I don't have to deal with this sort of thing. All I want right now is for us to be left alone. I'll go along with letting your friends know when deliveries come and go so they don't stain their undies whenever Roz comes in to get a stupid load of honey. Other than that, you and Tak can work something out. She is our General in charge. You are part of the SEN. Since you two are sharing quarters I'd think you can find some mutual arrangement Zim and I can agree with. But my personal guard is my own. No one touches it. Got that? And don't ever bury me with theoretical details again because you _are_ surrounded by a hundred Irkens who will do as I ask. Oh, and Dib? You might also want to remind your SEN friends that since our family has a spacecraft, we can always pack up and leave. I don't think they can. Remind them that Zim and I don't _have_ to do anything. If they would like to _assist_, we will consider it."

Gaz cut the connection, drew in the final touches on the new unit patches for her guard on the computer before her and ordered Computer to send it to Beed on the _Doomwind_. Then she shut down the system and made her way into the computer lab. The volume was rather loud, but not entirely surprising.

"You STUPID nard-hog!" Tak was yelling from the large display screen. "You can't seriously expect to construct a hundred dreadnought sized and remote controlled orbital defense satellites as a _first_ step in defending our planet! That's insane, and anything you design is a disaster waiting to happen! How are you going to ever going to concentrate your firepower or meet an attacker on your own terms if you surrender the initiative to the enemy? He would be able to use the planet as a shield from a third of your units, not to mention block his approach vector with the Earth's moon!"

"That's the beauty of it!" Zim angrily shouted back. "We turn the moon into a giant singularity cannon! Sneaking up behind the moon is a classic maneuver. A fleet comes in and WHAM! No more fleet! Your plan involves swarms of small human flown jury-rigged spacecraft. Do you have any idea how many casualties they would take before getting into their own weapons range? That's a lot of parts we could put into far more survivable platforms!" Naturally Zim showed no concern about the theoretical human pilots.

"You think I would design something that couldn't fight effectively?" Tak screamed. "And we want a _mobile_ force to harass any enemy as they approach! Engage them far away then pull back to rearm and attack again. Keep them away from the planet! Your plan completely ignores that and gives up any capability for long range patrols! Dang it, Zim. This is just a first step. We need to train the humans, not babysit their lousy nest! That is what this plan is! Besides, what enemy is going to come all the way out were to attack this nothing of a planet?"

This was much worse that she had thought. "Zim?" Gaz asked. "Are you being an idiot again?"

She saw Zim lose his mental balance, such as it was, before he switched gears to respond to his bondmate. "Oh, um, Gaz-blossom. I didn't expect you to be listening in. We were just-"

"Planning on using my homeworld's moon to shoot black holes at people?" Gaz asked pointedly. "Are you really _serious_ about that?" Zim was blushing about now. "You brought Tak in for a reason, Zim. Made her the General, not you. So stop backseat driving and let her at the job you gave her to do. I know you want to help and it's unnatural for you to delegate when it comes to a mission. But Zim, you are not an Invader anymore. You're a Governor. Playing with weapons of mass destruction is not in your job description. Now apologize to General Tak. You know she's right and you just don't want to agree her personally. You are putting her under unnecessary stress and guess who will have to hear about it when Dib starts complaining?"

She didn't hear anything. "Zim. This is your wife speaking in case you have forgotten, and I'm already not in the mood from talking to Dib. You can either apologize to General Tak, or apologize to your sister Tak."

The concept of admitting that Tak was Zim's sister made him cringe inside, not that he would ever show it in front of Tak. "Zim will agree that Zim was hogging the mission." Zim told the other Irken. "Gaz is correct that Zim made you a General for a reason. You may of course proceed with your experiment."

"Victory for TAK!" the female Irken shouted just to annoy Zim.

"Tak!" Gaz fired a knife edged tone into her name. "You remember that Zim is the Governor. Just as he needs to learn to treat you like a proper general, you show him the respect his rank deserves. If you two make me referee between you again, I will have my guards take away all your weapons you are so eager to play with until you two can play together like the Elite Irkens you claim to be!"

Tak said nothing for a moment. "Of course, Lady Gaz."

"Yes, Gaz-blossom," Zim agreed. His human wife did have a bad habit of being right rather often.

"Good," Gaz said. "Now, Zim. We have skool tomorrow. But it's not late yet and Gir would like for us to take him for a walk before you go out on your runs tonight. He's been feeling neglected today."

* * *

Agent Darkbootie sat in front of his computer within his janitorial closet at NASAplace. He had been in online conference meetings with Agent Tunaghost. Agent Mothman had been in and out of the communications loop for much of the afternoon. He had finally gone for the night to take care of his alien bondmate.

Tunaghost's shadowy image hung in a corner window on his computer as the video Mothman had just e-mailed to him played in the foreground. The camera angle was to the back of the couple who had just gotten finished with an off-world communication. One of them was a purple haired young girl, the other was of a green skinned person with antennae coming out of his head. The voices came out clearly.

_ "Computer, update the projections of needed supplies. Is it affordable?"_

_ "Only the quantities for biological requirements have been impacted. These are low cost basic items. Very few mechanical or technical components are necessary to augment final inventory. This is much more affordable than the fifty thousand monies Hypergate fee would have been."_

_ "Computer, if things keep going like this we're going to get quarantined. And we haven't even considered developing any type of system defense yet. Please look into how to develop our available resources with these things in mind," _Gaz asked of the obviously self-aware Computer.

_ "Yes, Mistress. This will take quite some time. A few days perhaps."_

The girl had to sit down._ "Zim," _she called_._

The green one took a compassionate seat next to the girl. _"Zim, I just was trying to be nice and show concern to a delivery guy. To try not be a doomer. Okay, maybe annoy some higher ups on Irk a little. But I ended up ruining thirty lives. They fared worse than if I had been deliberately dooming one person. I almost got thirty of them deactivated because I was trying to be nice. I feel like I am barely able to help you rebuild. What am I going to do with thirty?"_

This Zim pulled the girl in close and offered comfort. _"Gaz-blossom, you did not destroy anything. You are helping Zim's life to be better than it could ever have been. All these Irkens were in dead-end jobs with no hope for advancement in society. To be stepped on always. They do not know it yet, but now they have something. It will be strange, but you have given them a mission to pursue. You have shown that you care for your people, and they are your people now. However it happened, even though you are human they will follow you not because you are taller than them, but because you are worthy of it. You gave them what you needed them to accomplish, and released them to do so without second guessing. You made a way for them when they needed it. You stepped up for them when they were being stepped on. They will do the same for you. Zim is not cut out to be a ruler. He knows this now. He is a destroyer, a combatant. You, however, have always shown that you can be a ruler. In a way you have ruled our skool for many years. All know better than to displease you, yet also to leave you alone. But now you are showing what kind of ruler you one day can become."_

_ "I don't want to rule my planet," _Gaz replied in a small voice.

_ "Zim has news for you, Gaz-blossom. We've already been made rulers by the Tallest. But that doesn't mean we are hands-on or involved like you are imagining. Just the opposite in fact. We are not supposed to interfere. To be visible. You've just been knocked off balance learning that you have your own personal guard. You have not expected this responsibility, having other's lives in your hands, but you are handling it superbly."_

The girl tucked her head into the Zim character's neck and wrapped an arm around him. _"I guess we both have a lot to learn. Thanks, Zim."_

They remained like that for awhile. The girl pulled her head away to look at the green one. _"Gaz-blossom?" _she inquired.

_ "Yes."_

_ "I think I can live with blossom." _

Neither Darkbootie nor Tunaghost said anything for several minutes. Tunaghost's shadowed image broke the silence.

"Dang," she said. "I… I think… Dang."

Darkbootie just nodded his head. "Took the words right out of my mouth."

"We can't use this," Tunaghost said. "It's proof that aliens exist. That they've been to Earth. Hell, that Mothman was right about a lot of things concerning this Zim. But we can't use it. I mean… Dang. Just look at them. I wish I had a boyfriend that treated me like that."

"I am looking at them," Darkbootie said. "And we can use this."

"No, we can't. We can't betray a confidence. We can't use this against them."

"Oh, you misunderstand, young one," Darkbootie said, watching the video play again. "It's perfect. It was given voluntary with no editing at all. Proof of an alien, yes. But its far more useful than that. It's proof of their _intentions._ And far more valuable, it shows a shred of humanity in them. It shows something other than a blood-drunk alien pictured by the lazy entertainment world. It shows a heart. I mean just look at him with that human girl. He's caring for her as a precious loved one. But the most important reason why we can use it, is that it doesn't show their faces."

"But they say their names," Tunaghost objected.

"No one will object if I bleep out their names to protect them, as long as I document my work and keep this original copy intact in my personal archive."

Darkbootie thought some more. "I do believe we can work with these people. You have already told me much about your conversation with Mothman and Tak. I suppose we should give them all codenames to protect them from the unscrupulous."

"How can you be sure?" Tunaghost asked. "Dib's reports have always indicated this Zim was capable of being a real monster at times. Do you remember that this guy stole organs from his classmates?"

"Yes I do. I also remember that the girl in the video convinced this Zim to return them when he was no longer in danger. Even back then she had an influence on him. No lasting harm was ever done. Some of those organs were returned in better condition than when they were taken. Especially that one with the tumor. Doctors called it a miracle, but we knew better."

"That doesn't justify it."

"No," Darkbootie agreed. "But it made sense from his alien perspective. It takes one of two things to learn new ways of seeing things. The first is time. Enough time goes by and things can become clearer. I know I was a no good punk in my youth."

"Is that what happened to you?" Tunaghost asked.

"Hell no," Darkbootie laughed. "Just look at that video. They remind me of my dear late wife, gone these past twenty years. You see, Tunaghost, The second thing is the right partner. You find the right one, and just their presence in your life enables you to be a far better person than you could ever be on your own. And makes you want to strive to be that person, not for yourself, but for that special one you love more than life itself. To not let her down. You don't even think about it when it's for real."

"Yes," Darkbootie remarked, "I do believe we are seeing such a thing at work before our eyes. Even Mothman seems to have found his match. He was always a bit obsessed with a stereotypical view when it came to these 'evil' aliens. But this one, he put everything on the line for this member of an 'enemy' species for nothing promised in return. Then married the girl because she's biologically dependant on him! He really manned up there. Never thought I'd live to see the day that would happen. Yes, I think we can work with these people. I will go through the motions just to be sure, but even so I will classify this family as off limits."

"Even without an agreement?" Tunaghost asked. "On your own authority? I know they would respond badly but still-"

"Young lady, you've never been married to your truest partner," Agent Darkbootie told her. "I know what I would have done if someone had wanted to harm my beloved late wife. And I sure as hell didn't have a carrier strike group at my disposal. You'd be dang sure that I wouldn't have hesitated to use it if I had."

* * *

Beed looked at the new unit emblem as Lim and several other looked over his shoulder. It was a black silhouette of a standing puffy farm animal holding a light yellowish cylinder of wood in one hand and thumping the wider end into an open palm in a threatening manner. Up above in Earth script was the words _1__st__ Black Sheep Squadron_. Underneath was written in larger lettering _Originals Stand Tallest_. There were similar ones for 2nd, 3rd and 4th squadrons yet to be formalized. For those were the phrases _Taller Than Life_, _Making Tall Look Short_ and _It Ain't Broke…Yet_. Beed had a good idea which one would end up being the engineering/demolition squadron.

Lim was grinning with the rest of them. She turned to the rest of the group. "Pull the uniform fabrication unit out of storage and start making up the new uniforms right away. Paint these unit patches on all the body armor, the Spittle Runners, and the Assault Shuttles. Put it on the Cargo Shuttles even."

Beed let himself smile too as he pulled out his Pad and looked up crew records. There were only thirty that could belong to the First Squadron. Lady Gaz made that point clear. When they got to Earth and had a chance to really start training for their assignment they would work the hardest. No matter how many or how few were assigned, the original thirty would always be Lady Gaz's Own. They would make sure they would be her best unit.

Lim began to walk out of the compartment with the others.

"Where are you heading off to?" Beed called after her.

She smiled with a certain glint in her eyes, pointing at the new Black Sheep emblem pictured on Beed's Pad. "I am going out to paint one on the bow of the ship."

* * *

Dib stepped out of the portable shower in their quarters, rubbed himself vigorously with a towel and dried off the water from the stall and put on his pajama bottoms. He grabbed a small bottle of the cleansing gel and set it next to the stall.

He had heard the shouting in the next compartment die down, and figured that Tak would be on her way back soon. Sure enough their door opened and an infuriated Tak stepped into the room.

Dib stepped up and took hold of her. She was trembling.

"Zim is a big fat pig head," she said.

She was really stressed if that was the best she could do at the moment. "I know. Zim sucks."

Foreheads touched and antennae swept into his hair. Dib guided Tak to the shower stall. He averted his eyes until she got in. He kneeled down looking at the floor.

"Dib."

"Yes?"

"Look at me."

Dib raised his eyes. Tak sat in the shower stall. "Dib, it's okay to look at me like this. You are my mate."

"I know Tak. I'll get used to this," he reassured her. This was the closest thing they had on hand to therapy. Plus she was his bondmate. He just wasn't used to this sort of thing being acceptable.

He began to apply the cleansing gel, first along her scalp and face, then up along her antennae. Dib knew what Tak had said had a double meaning. It wasn't just about her current state of dress, but that she couldn't let anyone else see this broken side of her. He began massaging her tense shoulders.

"Tell me what happened," Dib requested.

"Zim wouldn't listen. Kept trying to convince me of his moronic, grandiose, microscopic-brained idea of giant battle platforms. We went around in circles for what seemed like forever. Then his mate came in and said he was being dumb and to listen to me and to give me his approval for the go ahead. Then she made him apologize to me for being something called a backseat driver. Then she told me I should be more respectful of Zim. Of ZIM!"

Dib started on her green arms, three fingered hands and toes, careful not to dislodge the engagement ring on Tak's finger.

"Sounds like she was mostly on your side. You got what you were seeking for your project. Seemed like you had a good day. Accomplished everything you set out to do. I think you pushed yourself too hard. You are barely out of the medical bay and you are trying to run flat out. You just can't do that."

Dib began toweling his Irken bondmate off. "Try to take it slow. How many different things were you working on today? Four? Five? One should be too many."

"There is so little time, Dib." Tak voiced her concern. "We are scheduled to leave for Earth in less than five days."

"I know, but we don't need everything done by the time we get there. Just a good direction."

Dib handed Tak her nightie and she slipped it on. He then guided and settled her into their hammock and the heaped up blankets sitting on top of it.

"Is that better?" He asked. There was a nod of that green head and a waving of those curled antennae. "Good." Dib crawled in with her and held Tak close.

"I'll tell Agent Darkbootie to postpone the debriefing tomorrow," he told her.

"No," Tak said as she wrapped her arms around her mate. "This needs to be done very soon. I'll put off everything else, and you can be there with me. But for us to have an accepted place on Earth, I have to do this."

They didn't say anything for a good long while. "Dib? If today was such a good day, and I did so well, why am I like this?"

"Maybe because part of you went back to Dirt. Maybe you've forgotten how to cope with the stress of dealing with others, even when it turns out well. Especially if it involves Zim. In order for you to feel relief from it you have to go back to that moment when I first bathed you. Like you are trying to relive that moment."

Tak took this in for a moment. "A part of me is still back on Dirt?"

"Maybe," Dib said. He bent his head down and gave a compassionate kiss in between her antennae. They reached back up and into his clean hear. "I don't really know what is happening. It's just a guess. But whatever it is, I'll always be here to bring you back home."

He pulled Tak even closer, if such a thing was even possible. She took in his scent deeply and relaxed into his form. This was the place where she felt she could let down her guard and just let go. Deep within the arms of her mate.


	21. Chapter 20

A/N: Hey guys. Sorry for the delay. Lost track of time for awhile and it's taken a solid week and a half of work to get this done. This is a very large chapter. 25,000 words. Couldn't find a good place to break it up and is centered mostly around Tak.

Was very distracted with building my crew on an MMO and teaching them to operate as a single unit rather than a bunch of uncoordinated individuals. But I find it a bit interesting that just as in this story they are nearing a point of potentially building a defense force for earth, and here I am building one online. Have about ten new players so far. Gives me new appreciation of the job Zim, Gaz, Dib and Tak have ahead of them. It's a lot of hard work and takes a lot of time. Well, I am very ADD, my readers. Laser-like focus, but only in one direction and not regulated.

This chapter goes into some matters regarding biology. Actually this chapter revolves around it. No, it is not a lemon. While not really more than what one would learn in health class, it is way outside my comfort zone of writing. Yes, I admit I am a very prudish person. I needed a reason to get Dib back to Earth and couldn't come up with other options. I spent nearly a week trying until I came up with this.

General Tak's codename within the SEN is Ninja Spirit. Gaz's would eventually be Dark Fury. Will take suggestions on what Zim's should be. Gir and Mimi won't need any.

Thanks as usual to all my reviewers and PM'ers: 8th Demention (I hope my instructions helped you out in posting your own fanfics), Zerg170 (who has reviewed from the very beginning. Much appreciated!) memmek10k (who had been around for quite some time as well), Catgirlfireflare, Kazehana23 (who has PM'ed back and forth an a few occasions. Always good to consult with you), crazyanimefreak15, RocketMan131, cold blue and .5.

coldblue: Thanks for your lengthy review and your willingness to help. No it does not annoy me, and I think I finally found a place to put Mini into the story. I read what happened to her while researching on Wiki, and had to go back and watch the Tak episode again because it's very easy to miss. But that is what happened. Mimi will have a very minor role, but she is back. As for a fight with the Irken Military, that has been done by many writers and I like being unconventional. This story was always going to go in a direction that is… different. I hope you will like the end of phase three in the upcoming chapter and phase four: Recovery. We are not quite there yet, but getting close. Glad you liked the idea of turning the moon into a black hole cannon. It's so insane I could just picture Zim wanting to do that and how badly things would go wrong if he did. Actually that would make a cool episode. But everything will remain covert, which is incredibly easy since the majority of humans in IZ are so unobservant. One thing I would like to point out is that there isn't any Earth Empire. It is too small, isolated, technologically undeveloped, dumb, ect. Zim and Gaz are rulers in name only to keep Zim in exile, but they are assigned to be more like secret and unseen guardians. Sort of like how MIB is covert and unaffiliated with any Earth politics, and operates so that the rest of Earth remains undisturbed. And since no one wants Earth, talk about a cushy job. But I agree that in a few decades Earth would be a nasty hornet's nest to stick one's nose into. But that is beyond the scope of this story. However, your review caused me to think about what happened to Skooge (I am ADD). He's been gotten rid of on multiple occasions and was the conqueror of Blorch. I could see him as 'Governor' of Blorch, now a parking structure planet, much like Zim is 'Governor' of Earth. Valet parking anyone? Who knows? I may even work that in to the story later.

* * *

Tuesday Morning, approximately 3:30am Earth Time - Irken Time: not so early.

Tak was running. It was exhilarating, finally able to run after so many years. She ran laps around the maintenance bay which was growing more and more crowded with cargo containers waiting to be stowed away everyday. Her powered armor whined as servos rotated and joints bent. Her foot cast was off, but she was still only half her weight and had lost a great deal of muscle mass during her starvation diet on Dirt. Granted, the armor was doing most of the work right now. But her own muscles were getting something out of it. And using powered infantry armor was doing something more important for her in using it for physical therapy. Retraining her muscle memory. She knew she had lost a great deal during her time on Dirt. It wasn't just the crippled foot. The savage diet and missing Irken nutrients hadn't done wonders for her stamina levels or physical health. That didn't even include the effects of existing with a broken soul that knew she was never leaving that place of pure muck.

She jumped over a stack of boxes, flipping over in a mid-air somersault. Then landed flat on her faceplate and skidded several feet before halting on the deck. She quickly picked herself up and looked around. There was still no one around. Their escorts Yat and Flom had been reassigned to other duties the previous day as it was clear that Dib and Tak could be trusted not to hijack the ship or do something crazy. Plus she was the commanding General of Earth's system defense forces (even if they didn't exist yet) and _Doomwind_ was marginally part of that. There was no deliveries for several more hours and the rest of the crew was off doing other things.

Tak grumbled as she set off again at a slow run, thankful that no one had seen that and annoyed that she could be clumsy now. But the Irken sighed as she thought of what her bondmate Dib would say. _You're pushing yourself too far again. Be patient_. She didn't want to be patient.

Or was it that she had forgotten how to be patient? In order to stay sane, she had been going through the motions of hopelessly staying alive while waiting for the end to come back on Dirt. That wasn't patience. That was surrender.

She growled at herself at these useless thoughts as she turned a corner. _What is wrong with me?_ she asked herself. But she knew. Dib had been right. A part of her was still back on Dirt.

Tak was angry with herself at this. She ran a little faster. _I'm not on Dirt. My life isn't over anymore. I have a bondmate. I am a General now_. She jumped over a crate and kept running. Another small stack of crates came up. She planted her gauntlet covered hands on the top container and vaulted over them. Her fingers slipped and threw off her balance. Tak skidded along the deck again on her armored rear as she let out a primal screech of rage.

She remained seated on the deck for several moments to collect herself. Purple eyes closed and she took in several deep breaths. _ I shouldn't keep doing this_, she told herself. _I know I'm not ready for that. Why do I keep trying? I was only going to run in a circle for a while. Why do I keep trying to perform like this is a combat obstacle course?"_

Tak stood up and headed back to the long and narrow compartment that was being used as an infantry equipment locker. She sat on a crate, powered down the light armor suit and pulled off the helmet and gauntlets. As the suit was put away, she pondered what she had been doing. Attempting basic and even more advanced maneuvers over obstacles while running. Ones she had learned in her first days of combat training.

Tak hissed at herself. It was stupid. She should be happy that she no longer walked with that horrid limp. That she could go on a slow run for a short distance unaided. Using the powered armor for physical therapy was a good idea, yet she was trying to do too much. She had no business hurdling obstacles at this point. _What am I trying to prove?_

The Irken had caught herself in this cycle several times in the past few days. _Why do I do this_? She asked herself as she disconnected the legs from the torso and extracted her lower limbs. _ I know better. I tell myself I won't push _too _hard, but then I try to go beyond what I should. Beyond what I can right now. Why am I-_

_ trying to show I can be Elite_? Tak finished her question. Part of her mind was still back on Dirt, but another part was further back as well. Still trying to prove that she could be elite. She thought back to her earlier inner remark. Of having a bondmate. Being a General. _I had it backward for a moment_, she thought. _I have the position of General, but I am a bondmate. That is who I am now._

The Irken squirmed her way out of the torso on the floor like a worm, glad no one was around. _I am even skimping on my PAK maintenance. I am supposed to be getting six hours a night at a minimum, not two_.

Dib hadn't caught on since humans slept for at least eight hours each night. She had spent most of the time enjoying just being in her sleeping bondmate's arms. Except when he started grunting in his sleep. Then she got up to accomplish something. The faint odor he emitted at such times wasn't unpleasant. Just strange, and that muffled grunting sound was rather annoying to have directed into one's antennae. Humans, even a bondmate, were just weird.

Tak put her armor back in its assigned locker and smoothed out her gray fatigues. She was glad that the Irken uniforms had been changed. Her mental associations were still skewed, needing to withdraw from what was Irken rather than alien like she was supposed to. It would be for the rest of her life. So it was good to wear something that reflected her work and yet did not scream _Irken_. Tak shook her head. It was starting to get confusing. Wanting to go forward, forget the past and yet bits and pieces of her mind stuck back there. She left the compartment to go find her Dib. His latest attempt at teaching the other Irkens about Earth should be almost over by now.

* * *

"No," Dib told his class of fifteen smallest Irkens. He did not know how this topic got started. But this sort of thing seemed to happen often. Perhaps this time it had something to do with the peach fuzz on his face. He hadn't brought a razor for shaving, another thing he had forgotten in his rush to rescue Tak. "A milk mustache is not really a type of mustache that humans grow. It comes from having cow's milk sloshing up over your upper lip when you drink it and forming a film there when you put the glass down."

There were several sounds from the class indicating disgust. One of them stood up to ask a question. "Why would humans wish to steal and ingest an animal female's produced nourishment for its young? Is there a shortage of human females to milk for your nourishment? From what you have previously said about Earth population, this does not seem likely."

Dib brought his hand up to his mouth and shook his head. It amazed him how such naively asked questions could be so wrong. And these classes seemed to specialize in that department. He was thankful at that moment none of them had heard of breast pumps for new mothers. He was _very_ thankful that no one had asked where milk actually came from. Yet.

"Which part of the female does this 'milk' come from? And how does one extract it? Is that why lines to female public bathrooms are so long? Is that where human milking takes place?"

_Oh God,_ Dib thought as he covered his face with his palm.

The door to the compartment opened and Tak stepped through. Dib saw the look on her face and was torn between concern for her and thankful that her distress was perfect timing.

"That will be all for today," Dib told the class as he made his way to Tak and took her by the arm.

The door closed behind them as they made their way to their quarters. Dib put a hand on her shoulder as they walked along the corridor. They didn't say anything. It was a short walk and Tak wasn't going to open up in public when she was troubled in this way.

They walked into their quarters and doors closed behind them. Tak stepped into the shower. Dib let out a sigh as he looked at the floor, trying to give her a moment of privacy. Tak had no understanding why this was necessary for him or why this made him uncomfortable. He was just bathing her. Granted, this activity was accelerating. Especially after her painful debriefing with Agent Darkbootie yesterday morning.

The SEN agent hadn't been forceful or nasty with his questions. He was rather patient and benign in his verbal probing. In fact he hadn't asked about many things she had been expecting, such as about the Irken military, technology, codes, training methods and so on. His questions had been about her. Her life as a smeet, her ill-fated visit to Earth and after. Those had brought up many bad memories and Dib had stepped in, telling Agent Darkbootie to give them an hour. She had to be bathed four times in three hours that day. After that Darkbootie made easier inquiries. About her bond with Dib. How he was treating her.

Tak brought herself back to the present with a shake of the head. Perhaps that was why she seemed so fragmented today.

"Dib?" she asked.

"Yes?" he responded as his hands began to apply the cleansing gel to her skin and began to rub.

Tak relaxed into his touch. The tensions within her mind melted away. She closed her eyes and began to purr. The Irken kept this up for several seconds. "I think I'm becoming addicted to this," she said. It was a semi-logical guess. It made sense as the frequency of how much she needed this correlated with the amount of stressful situations she was required to endure. Then she noticed Dib's fingers had gone still.

She opened her eyes. Dib was staring at her with wide eyes. His hands withdrew from her.

"Dib? What is wrong?"

Those five fingered hands went back to work. "Nothing," the human said.

Tak looked at her bondmate closely. He was withholding something from her. She took his hand in her own. "Dib, open up to me."

Something about this seemed to make Dib more edgy. "I can't. Not like this," he said, gesturing to her.

Tak eyed her human. When he got to rubbing cleansing gel on her chest and belly the tension he was trying to hide increased. She looked down to her Irken body. Tak had put on some weight, but it had only been half of a week. Her ribs still protruded grotesquely underneath her green skin, and her arms and legs did not look much better. Even if there was some improvement, it still looked bad.

"This disturbs you," Tak commented. "I know I look terrible. Ugly even. To touch me when I'm so-"

"Tak," Dib interrupted as he began wiping the Irken down with a towel. "Stop that. It's not you. You are not ugly so stop talking like that." He turned away and handed her the fatigues she had been wearing. The human went on in a softer voice. "Tak, doing this for you, which I want to do to help you, is effecting me."

"I don't understand what your problem is, or why you are behaving like we need a wall between us at these times. You are my bondmate. Irken bondmates have no need for privacy between them. We are bonded."

Dib looked back at the Irken. Tak was dressed once more. He reached out to her and took her three fingered hand into his own five fingers. "Tak. It's a human thing. There isn't anything about this human aspect in your culture. I don't even know if you are even capable of such things and, and… gosh, Tak. I can't even talk about it. I don't know how." He took a deep breath. "Tak, I'm starting to have dreams about this."

Tak of course was not satisfied. "Dreaming? What could be so difficult about your human dream? It sounds like all you dream about in your sleep cycle is exercise. And how you manage to drool into your own lap while laying on your back is beyond me. I'm right there with you, so I know you don't sit up in your sleep."

Dib's face went white then immediately changed to the deepest of reds. "I… I…" he sputtered. "Because I'm starting to… I mean I… it's getting hard to stay detached when I… when we…" He finally gave up. "Tak, I'm just trying to do right by you. But I don't know much about this sort of thing. Not in real life. Please, Tak. Just let this drop for now."

Her bondmate left their quarters. Tak was very not satisfied with how this went and naturally she was not going to 'let this drop.' She had been intending to get some PAK maintenance after her sponge bath. Instead she sat in front of the room's computer interface and requested a communications channel to Earth. She really didn't want to talk to Zim about whatever this was. It was unlikely he had any more insight into what was going on than she did. Gaz might, but she would be asleep back on Earth and would soon be too busy getting ready for skool. Tak wanted answers NOW. She accessed the protocols Dib had stored within Tak's ship. A few minutes went by before the display updated. _Connecting…_

Another few minutes went by. A shadowed figure appeared on the display. The shape groaned and a few joints popped. "Hello?" the shadow mumbled sleepily, rubbing her eyes. "What time is it? Oh hell! This had better be important. I just got back from a nighttime stakeout after going to a party and even I need sleep."

"Agent Tunaghost?" Tak asked.

"General Ninja Spirit? What is the trouble and why are you calling instead of Agent Mothman?"

"To be honest I don't know. Di- I mean Mothman is going through something and he's not talking to me. He says it's a human thing and that I wouldn't understand, but he can't explain. I think he tried for a moment, but he had to leave the room. Leave me. He said that bathing me was effecting his dreams in some way."

Agent Tunaghost stumbled in her thoughts for a moment. "Wait. What? He _bathes_ you and you're troubled that its effecting him?"

Tak nodded. "When I bonded, my need for any privacy regarding anything from Di- I mean Mothman, was destroyed. Privacy should be a thing of the past between us. But my bondmate keeps putting up some kind of barrier between us at times. He tries not to look at me until after I am sitting in our shower stall. I know he's only cleaning me because it has become necessary for me in order to find relief from the strain of what is happening around us. My need for him to wash me has been increasing with the stresses, and I told him that I felt like I was starting to become addicted to his washing me and-"

"Wait. You said that?" Tunaghost interrupted.

"Yes. Then he got this strange expression and froze for a moment. When I asked him to open up to me, he finished my bath in a hurry, fumbled some kind of disrupted attempt at an explanation which made no sense."

"I'm not surprised," Tunaghost replied with a smirk.

Tak went on. "He made some comment that this was effecting his dream state. I don't comprehend how dreaming of exercise has anything to do with looking at me or bathing me."

"Exercise? Why would you think that is what he dreams of?" the shadow on the display asked.

Tak tilted her head. "Because he has started to grunt in his sleep. Don't humans grunt when lifting heavy objects? Anyway, after that his skin turned strange colors when I said I couldn't figure out how he managed to drool into his own lap in his sleep. I sleep right next to him, so I know he doesn't sit up in his sleep-"

"Ninja Spirit, stop. You have to stop."

Tak closed her mouth. Agent Tunaghost let out a sigh and pressed several buttons on her own system. A primitive Earth electronic voice spoke out. "Recording deleted."

The Irken had been over-focused to remember about that part.

"Tak, girl," Tunaghost slowly spoke. "that's not drool, and your bondmate isn't dreaming about exercise. If you were human, bathing you would be, um, very suggestive to him. Becoming addicted to that sort of attention and asking him to open up to you could be even more so. He is a guy, Tak. That part of his biology is always standing by, and runs mostly on automatic. Not looking at you undress is his way of treating you with respect, as well as blocking out sensory input that could put his biology on high alert."

"On alert?" Tak asked. "Why would such a thing be seen as a threat?"

"Oh dear," Tunaghost let slip. "Tak. Are you really that naive?"

Tak looked at her with fire in her purple eyes. "Excuse me? I made to be an Irken soldier. I was not grown nor trained to be _innocent_, human!"

Tunaghost gulped. "Tak, I'm not insulting you. I'm speaking as one girl to another. Mothman, your bondmate, is struggling with things he wasn't prepared for. He is a social outcast on my planet. He's never had to actually face these sort of things before, and he is still young without much practical understanding himself. Agent Mothman was never going to have a mate here on Earth and he knew it. He wasn't prepared for what he is dealing with now."

The human on the display took in a deep breath before continuing. "Tak, your bondmate is dreaming about mating. His biology senses an opportunity. That's what I meant by high alert. That part for humans is usually automatic, and your bondmate is probably trying to suppress it for your sake. But it manifests in his sleep when his defenses are down."

"You mean at night when I wake up… that is his… _mating goo_?" Tak asked.

"I've never heard of it called that before, but yes." Agent Tunaghost replied. "Listen. Your bondmate has a major savior complex in his mental makeup and it is not well balanced. You have been traumatized, and he is taking care of you. Protecting you, even from himself. This is a very complicated situation for him. And this sort of thing between humans is rather complicated in itself. If done or handled incorrectly this sort of thing can leave some of the deepest mental scars a human can have, and you've already taken plenty of those."

Tak didn't say anything. Tunaghost spoke further. "Tak, you have known nothing of this sort of thing. That is why you are naïve. On this planet, to take advantage in this way is one of the worst crimes one can do to another. We have to have laws to protect those accused of such things because most people would prefer to hunt them down and kill them all, and sometimes accusations are false or misdirected. And one other thing. On our planet there is only one sentient species. Not hundreds. Part of him may feel guilty about responding like this to an alien who knows nothing about such things. Do you understand?"

The Irken nodded her head. "My mate keeps saying he is trying to do right by me. I did not realize what he meant or how much he was struggling. He is being a good bondmate to me."

She looked down into herself. She had been focused on her own self and her own troubles. At least when it came down to her own stresses. Coping with her own new responsibilities, how to measure up to them. She showed some support for her mate, but not like Dib was with her. That would have to change. Well, to a degree. Tak couldn't change the fact that she was Irken, and Irkens were fairly self-centered. They didn't just bond with everyone they met after all. "I must do better for him," she decided out loud.

"Oh, Tak." Tunaghost remembered another piece of advice. "Try not to hold any of his dreams against him. Humans can't control what they dream about. It's sort of like purging a set of data buffers at times. They can be made up of random variables."

"What do you mean?" Tak asked. There was a lack of a pleasant tone in her voice.

"Humans can't control who or what they dream about most of the time."

Tak did not like the sound of that. But it wasn't like she could build a machine that would let her enter Dib's dreams and kill whoever he was dreaming of in a deserved fit of jealousy. Well, not right away at least.

* * *

"No," Dib told his next class of that morning. He was standing in front of a long table in front of several rows of seats filled with Irkens. On the wall behind him was projected an image. "Just because a neighbor's dog relieves itself on Gaz's lawn is not an excuse to vaporize the dog. Or the neighbor. Or fling the neighbor's house into space. You should remind the neighbor to put the dog on his leash when let outside. Oh, and don't ask the dog."

They had been watching a home movie that had caught a rare and brief scene of Gaz retaliating one night after stepping on a doggie land mine. The picture did not show a small flaming bag of dog poo on the neighbor's porch. More like a bag of fifty pounds of pig manure with an M-80 stuck in the middle. Dib was struggling to explain how Gaz's behavior was in no way acceptable human behavior. She was just able to get away with it. Of course the Irkens were taking in scenes such as these like candy after a long diet of lima beans.

The door opened and Dib saw Tak step inside. He was about to send her a smile in welcome. She did not come to his classes. Then he saw the look on her face. It was not a happy look.

Tak cleared her throat to get the room's attention. Irken eyes turned around.

"Clear the compartment. I want a word with my bondmate."

Three quarters of a second to respond was too slow.

_"Clear the faptizek compartment, now!"_ Tak rumbled.

It wasn't the slightly raised volume, but the burning hint of seriously ticked off bondmate that was carried in her tone.

Bondmates were rare in the Irken civilization, but the word was that if one was harmed you really did not want to be found in the path of the other. The rumor, however, was that you _absolutely_ did not want to get in between them when a quarrel appeared on the horizon. Getting caught in the middle of a head-on collision between two dreadnoughts was more pleasant. The compartment cleared in less than six seconds.

"Who is she?" Tak asked once they were alone and the door closed

Dib was very confused. "What?" he asked.

"Your dreams. I know, Dib. You are guarding yourself toward me, but when you go to sleep you let it go. Is she human? Is that it?" Tak's spider legs extended out of her PAK as she approached and lifted her over rows of seats.

"Tak, I don't know what you are talking about. There isn't anything to be jeal-"

"I had a talk with Tunaghost, _Dib_," the jealous Irken informed her bondmate. "I know what you were dreaming about. I have a good idea what you were _leaking_. Did you think I was stupid for thinking it was drool?"

Dib backed up. "No, Tak. Never. I just couldn't… I didn't know how. Irkens don't function like that. You don't even have the concept! You Irkens think so much of what humans do is disgusting, but…"

Tak was now within a few inches of Dib's face. The spider limbs retracted back into her PAK, and now her voice was quieter. Dib wasn't sure which was worse. The loud Tak or this quiet Tak. "Tunaghost said some things to me. That this is difficult for you. That you are trying to look out for me with some strange human notion that I don't understand. That your biology is responsive to stimuli and you are trying to suppress it for my sake. But it comes out at night when you sleep. We share a nest. We sleep together. I smell it, Dib. I hear your heavy breathing in my antennae at times. Don't think I don't know that your goo soaks your shorts. You may be dried out by the time you wake up, but you'd better believe it's a different story when I do!"

This sounded very bad to Dib's ears. But to Irken hearing? "Tak, please-"

The purple eyed Irken didn't stop. "You are _my_ mate. You hold back from me. Feel a need to avert your gaze from me when I get ready for bathing or change clothes. You feel you need to because I'm not your mate yet. Tunaghost said it is out of respect for me or something like that. I have no need for you to do so, but you do. Fine. But you sleep by my side. I sleep in your arms. Yet you mark me with your goo in your sleep-"

_Oh god_, Dib thought.

"as your mate while you could be dreaming of marking _someone else_? Is she human so you can feel guiltless about marking someone as your mate? Is that it? Because I'm an 'alien?' Well I have news for you, Dib. _You're_ the alien around here. You're not the only one bonded outside their species! Now, Dib, tell me who she is so I can go into your dreams and kill her for stealing what is rightfully mine."

Dib sat down on the table behind him. "You can't do that. You don't understand."

"No. _You_ don't understand. We both know I'm very good at making machines. I'm rather sure I could."

"Tak, please sit down," Dib invited the Irken before him.

"Tell me who she is," Tak insisted.

"I don't remember much. Humans don't usually remember their dreams."

"You're stalling. Tell me." Tak's arms crossed.

"Tak, listen!" Dib said forcefully. "Human mates don't mark each other like that." He pointed to the engagement ring on her finger. "That is how we mark our mates. Not to mention we have these." He fingered the bonding necklace hanging around his neck.

The Irken stopped glaring for a moment. She was missing something. But that didn't really matter either. "Many species do use a mating scent as a marking, so _excuse_ me! But you were still dreaming and Tunaghost said you were dreaming of mating. And you still won't tell me who! That means you're hiding who it is. That means its not me."

Dib began to see the logic behind the jealousy. "Tak. You don't even know what human mating is, do you?" He saw a symbolic wrench get tossed into the envious gears of her bonded instincts. "Did it occur to you that I'm really uneasy talking about that rather than who I was dreaming about?"

Dib asked another question. "Do Irkens males mark their mates like that? With a scent marking?"

The anger left Tak momentarily. In fact she felt a tad hollow right now, looking at the ring on her left hand. The truth was she had no idea. Only her bonded instincts which were rather territorial. Okay, extremely territorial. Her bondmate offered her a seat next to him on the table. She took it, letting her feet dangle over the deck.

"Dib. Tunaghost said you're biology was on high alert. Tell me who you were dreaming of," she asked quietly.

"Tak, Tak," Dib cooed, putting an arm around her. "I bathe you once or twice everyday. Four times yesterday. For an Irken it might just be a cleaning. For you it has become part of how you cope. Therapeutic even- Ow!"

An Irken claw dropped down to rest on the table after flicking his ear. "Quit stalling," she ordered.

"Hey! I was getting there. Really, Tak. With the constant contact we have? Who else would I dream of? I sleep with you, bathe you with my own hands when you're stressed."

Dib let out a sigh. He really _was_ stalling. The human looked into his hands. "I was dreaming of you, Tak. Most humans don't talk about those kind of dreams because it makes us vulnerable to intense ridicule and scorn from other humans. I'm not supposed to have those kind of dreams about aliens."

Tak didn't really understand what was happening inside the mind of her mate, but he was battling something within himself alone. And it was coming out in his sleep. But she knew the tools. Suppression, repression, avoidance. The pushing of a piece of one's self down into a hole. It was a crude method of dealing, or more precisely the learning of how not to deal, with something. But it cost a person. It may have saved her sanity back on Dirt, but it cost her heavily.

The human continued on. "I was dreaming of you becoming my mate. It can mean something different to a human. It's not just a mental or emotional bonding like it seems to be for an Irken."

Tak's jealousy transmuted into elation. Her bondmate was dreaming about her being his own mate. Then it occurred to her that she didn't even know what dreaming really was either. It wasn't an Irken thing. She began sensing just how much she didn't know. Tak turned her attention to her bondmate. "Dib, you can't suppress a part of yourself. I know what it does to a person. Believe me." Tak took one of his hands. "You, my bondmate, are human. Don't try to stifle what you are."

They sat there for some time. "Dib? About your goo…"

Dib let out a groan.

Tak tightened her grip on his hand. "Dib. How am I supposed to understand? We are bondmates. I need to know." Dib didn't say anything. "Remove the personal aspects. Scientifically speaking, what does it do?"

He knew she was right. And definitely had a right to know. "Tak, the short version is that back on Earth that is what a male releases to fertilize a female's egg cell. To propagate their species."

The realization hit Tak hard. She had been jealous because she had reckoned a possibility that her bondmate's dreaming was about marking a mating scent on some imaginary human to make her his human mate, while Dib and Tak slept in their bedding together. He was human, and his biology could have been geared in that direction. Of course Tak's instincts sensed a violation. But the truth was Dib had been dreaming of _fertilizing_ his chosen bondmate that he shared his bedding with.

The basic concept was enough to make any Irken puke into dry heaves, douse themselves with water for a year and then pick out every part of their brain that held that knowledge. And that was just for starters. But Tak? Tak had been right there with Dib when these things happened. Smelled the smell, heard the muted grunts and heavy breathing he emitted in his sleep. She had been indirectly exposed to his fertilization goo.

And yet for her it was the best news she had received in seven years. Perhaps in her whole life.

Tak knew how she would have reacted to any of this before Dirt, probably with lethal force, and yet could not imagine such a thing. She gave Dib's hand a comforting squeeze.

"Dib. It's alright."

The human looked at the Irken beside him. "Tak?"

"You are not in this alone. There are some things I'm struggling to adjust to also. I push myself too hard because a piece of me still tries to prove I can be elite. Another part goes back to when you rescued me from Dirt. I have to learn to let it go. So do you. Nothing about us is natural or how things should have been. But that's okay with me."

They sat there for several minutes. "You don't have anyone to talk to, do you?" Tak asked her human. He gave her an odd expression. "I mean about sensitive things that would turn others away."

Dib didn't say anything. He just shook his head.

* * *

Tak stood in the packed cargo bay with an opened crate of spare parts. She was almost finished. She had been decontaminating, scrubbing, pulling and replacing parts, soldering. She hadn't asked permission. She was the General, and these materials were going to the new base on Earth. And that base was under _her_ authority. Beed had checked in of course. The ship was his responsibility and he had to answer to Lady Gaz if anything happened. Once he was satisfied she was left alone to her work.

It took nearly three hours before the unit powered up and blank eyes turned red.

"Hello, Mimi. It's been along time."

The SIR robot saluted, and its holographic generator activated. The metal robotic form was transformed into a graceful black feline. The eyes examined the Irken standing before her starting at the feet. Those eyes narrowed in fury that said 'Who did this?'

Tak answered the non-verbal question. "Irkens did this to me."

Then Mimi's eyes reached Tak's necklace and widened in surprise. 'Mistress?' those eyes inquired.

Tak kneeled down closer to Mimi. "Yes. Everything has changed. You will not like them, but you will accept them. It that understood?"

Those red eyes narrowed once more, but blinked in compliance.

"Good." Tak resealed the container of spare SIR unit parts and tapped instructions into an automated grav lift to return them to storage. "We were rejected from the Irken military. They sent us back to Dirt. We were there for a long time. I was supposed to die there."

The Irken sat down next to the black feline who looked up at her Mistress. "Mimi, do you remember the human Dib Membrane?"

There was a nod. Even though Mimi had lost her memory disk back on Earth, it was a portable backup unit. Not the primary memory core. "Dib rescued us and has been taking care of me. Mimi, I have bonded with him. The human is my bondmate."

Mimi flattened her ears and those eyes turned into slits. A silent hiss. "I know you don't like it. I also do not care. He is my mate and you will accept him as such. That means Dib is your master."

Mimi's expression did not change much. But her tail swished back and forth. Tak could guess what was being expressed. "The humans are no longer an enemy species. Earth is designated as a protected planet and we are going to be a part of that. Acknowledge."

The eyes and ears returned to normal and the tail stopped twitching.

"Mimi. They dumped us in the sewage zone on Dirt. They disposed of us as such. We don't owe Irk anything. But Dib? When he found out what happed to us, he didn't wait. That human was the only one who came for us. Mimi, I need him. In a way he rescues me from Dirt everyday. But he is alone in many ways."

The black feline shape tilted her head.

* * *

"I don't care what you were trying to do!" Dib yelled at the display before him. He was back in their quarters and giving Agent Tunaghost the riot act. "You have no idea how possessive an Irken can be! I've seen Ninja Spirit threaten other female Irkens just because their job was to show me to my room. Her jealousy streak is supercharged, a mile wide, and has a hair trigger. Are you getting the picture? She came after me in a jealous fit because she got this idea I was _dreaming_ of putting some alien marking scent on someone else! Guess who put that thought in her head?"

"I'm sorry, Agent Mothman," Tunaghost told him.

Dib allowed himself to cool off a little. He ran a hand through his hair. "Tunaghost, I have no idea what I'm doing. She needs some kind of therapy with her trauma. I'm doing the best I can."

"Mothman. You need to start listening to yourself. You are avoiding a big discomfort zone and treating your bondmate like a patient. Ninja Spirit is not your patient and you are not her doctor. You two are married or whatever they call it out there. She came to me because her mate was shutting her out of something and she wanted to know what as going on. Ninja Spirit needs you to treat her as what she is. Your Irken wife."

"I know, I know," Dib replied. "I just have to figure out how."

"Yeah, I don't envy you. Maybe you should start off by taking her on a date."

Dib heard the door behind him sweep open and shut. "Alright, Tunaghost. If Ninja Spirit calls again, _please_ just direct her back to me? Mothman signing off."

He closed the communications channel and stood up, popping several vertebrae along his back. "Look, Tak about today…" Dib turned around and Tak was not there.

Sitting on the deck was a black feline with red eyes. It was vaguely familiar, and Dib was absolutely sure there were no cats onboard.

A beam flashed out, and a holographic message began to play. It was Tak.

"Dib, I fixed Mimi. She is our SIR unit. I have updated her on you and what has been happening. She knows you are my bondmate, so don't worry. I know you need someone to talk to. Mimi can fill in until I have educated myself. I will be in the communications compartment doing research, so don't bother me." The message blinked out.

Mimi sat there and regarded Dib with a look that said 'you are _so_ not worthy of being my master.'

"Aloofness, disdain, an air of superiority. Seems like you have acting like a cat down to a fine art."

There was a tilt of the head, as if to ask 'Was that a compliment or an insult? Not that I care.'

Dib sat back down in a chair, and Mimi swooped up onto the tiny desk before him.

"I don't know what to say."

Mimi fixed him with a look that plainly said 'That's because you are an idiot."

"Hey, I care about her. Tak means a lot to me. She's been through enough. I want to help her heal. Help her have a good life. I… I…"

Dib gave out a sigh. "I want to be a good mate. But I have no idea what that means. I mean not too long ago Irkens were a threat to my planet. Now they're a key part of its protection. I was guarding my homeworld from Irken invasion, now I'm trying to teach this group how to become a part of my home." He fingered the necklace around his neck. "Out here Tak is my wife, but on Earth she is my fiancée. There is a difference, you know. But right now she's both at the same time. It's enough to make my head spin if I think about it. I don't even know what that makes me."

Mimi straightened her posture. Apparently this had not been a response she had been anticipating. She climbed down off of the desk and onto his lap. It was remarkable how ethereal and lithe she was considering underneath that hologram she was a metal robot.

"When I help bathe her, its supposed to be therapeutic for her. But I'm starting to lose my ability to detach. I'm starting to be affected by it and Tak has no clue what that sort of thing means. It feels like a betrayal. I shouldn't feel that way when I'm trying to help her through a tough time."

Mimi curled up in Dib's lap and rested her holographic chin along her back. Her eyes flicked up to Dib's. As if to say 'You aren't very bright, but you are loving toward my Mistress. I guess you will do. For now.'

* * *

Tak sat in the comminications compartment alone. Announcing that she was going to be using most of the displays to research human bonding rituals had that effect on confined spaces. She stopped listening in over Mimi's encoded transmitter. She had enough and didn't want to intrude further. She had looked up several keywords using the datalink routed through Zim's Computer back on Earth to access databases there. _Wife, fiancée_, and some related ones such as _boyfriend, girlfriend, husband_. Mate, it turned out, had so many meanings that the word lost any meaning without a specified human context. In a way, her human had been trying to live in a relationship who's specific meaning was in limbo. Dib was right, several applied at the moment, and it would be confusing for him.

She looked up some more keywords. Something about bathing her was getting at him. Enough to influence his dreams. _Shower_ and _mating_ seemed like a good place to start.

Thankfully it led her to a clip of a mildly mushy scene on a recent broadcast movie. Or perhaps Computer was censoring some of the search results. She wasn't sure, but she quickly shut it off when things started getting… friendly. It was disturbing how quickly that happened. It seemed a female allowing any male to bathe her was an _invitation_ signal. One of many humans seemed to have as her research spread out. Humans seemed to respond very quickly to such signals, too.

She realized Dib was fighting a battle within himself. He was trying to find balance in completely unfamiliar territory with a damaged bondmate who had no such thing in her own culture. And had been doing so for days, all the way back on Dirt. He was honoring her by shielding her in his own way. He mentioned a few of his mental defenses he was applying in her behalf, but it was still effecting him.

Then she got to the crime reports. There were some very sick and twisted humans out there. Tak began to understand what Tunaghost had told her when she had called. It was no wonder her Dib was so uncomfortable. Why he looked away when she changed or entered the shower. It was some kind of protective mechanism to protect the naive within his human mindset. It would not release until conditions were acceptable, and Dib had been pushing on that in order to tend to her way of coping by being bathed. In fact conditions were ambiguous for him. Tunaghost and Dib had been correct. She was naïve. But that could be corrected.

She sped through her research. Being able to store and compute data into her PAK rather than just her brainmeat was a huge advantage in research. Tak switched over to human biology, running through it very quickly. It was interesting. They were very fragile, yet complex creatures. So very different from Irkens. Then she discovered babies.

That was what Dib's biology was trying to do? This was what humans meant by mate? And why wasn't she blasting the displays into a million pieces like a normal Irken?

Because she wasn't a normal Irken. She was completely bonded to a human. Her biological nervous system was tuned to accept her mate's biological processes. That is what allowed Irken bondmates to live in close quarters without killing each other when one had to go to the bathroom in a cramped spacecraft. But since smeets were made in smeet factories, no one had looked closer into it.

Wait, why was she looking up Irken biology? Oh. Oh dear. Oh dear oh dear oh dear. Wait. It was just curiosity. That was it. Comparative analysis. That made sense.

Until Tak looked up her own medical analysis. And saw all five missing egg sacs. She had been harvested as a donor upon graduation from smeethood while she was unconscious during the adult PAK upgrade. Tak got angry. That was for herself. Then she got jealously angry for her mate. Her egg sacs belonged to _him_, and him alone. _How dare they! How DARE THEY, they better not have-_ she couldn't even finish the concept.

Then it hit her just how far her bonding instincts had taken her. Tak gave herself a shake and hit a button on the terminal in front of her. "Sentinel Lim, report to Communications at once. Priority one, urgent."

A few minutes later Lim arrived at the compartment out of breath. She had run all the way from the far end of the ship. Lim found Tak backed against a bulkhead. Something in the other Irken's expression made her take a step back. "General Tak?"

Tak turned her gaze away from the display and fixed her vision on Lim. "That's General Tak _Membrane_." She pointed to the display. "F-f-find out w-what they d-did." She was in such a rage she could barely speak the command.

"I don't understand. Who did what?" Lim asked.

"If they made smeets with my eggs… that are rightfully my mate's-" Tak didn't finish the threat.

_Oh lords of Irk!_ Lim thought. Everyone on Irk knew you did not harm a bondmate. Once long ago a General's mate had been attacked and injured. The result was three galactic sectors rampaged just to hunt down one perpetrator. But _stealing_ a bondmate's eggs? That sounded like a whole different level of violation. Just the concept was wholly alien to think of.

Lim practically flung herself at the controls. She scanned through records as fast as she could. There were so many! "Tak. Listen to me. It's not just you. All females have this done. They need egg cell membranes in the smeet factories. It is how things are done. Its not an attack on you."

Tak looked at her coldly. The words she spoke sent a chill up Lim's PAK. "When _you_ are a bondmate, then you will understand."

Lim focused on her work. She hoped that word '_when'_ didn't haunt her until the day she died. On Irk, becoming a bondmate was always something heard about from an acquaintance of a work partner of a supervisor of an associate of a collogue who heard it happened to someone on another continent. But Lim had seen it happen first hand to Tak, an isolated, marooned and rejected Irken. It could happen to anyone.

It took time, but Lim finally found a record. No one ever inquired into these things, so no one ever took measures to classify them as secret. "Tak. There was an accident. Several thousand egg sacs were destroyed by a malfunctioning conveyer. Four of yours were among them. The last one was damaged. It was repaired, but categorized as substandard. It was never used. Tak, that was decades ago. It's lost somewhere in deep storage. It's impossible to find a record."

Tak sat down. Irk had taken so much from her already. _They destroyed my egg sacs?_ she cried deep within herself. She was torn between grateful that they had not been… _used_ and hurt at the destruction. But Tak pulled herself up out of that inner pit. There was still one out there. She pulled out a communicator from her PAK.

"Mimi, come down to Communications. I have a job for you."

"Tak, what are you doing?" Lim asked.

"I need information retrieved. I have a custom built Standard issue Information Retrieval unit onboard," Tak deadpanned.

Mimi swept into the room in her feline form and up onto the control interface.

"Mimi!" Tak commanded, pointing at the terminal. "Locate my egg sac."

Lim pulled Tak to the side of the room. "Tak, what are your intentions?"

Tak looked her straight in the eye. "I'm getting my egg sac back for my mate."

Lim didn't say anything. All of this was very non-Irken behavior. Tak looked at her some more. "Sentinel Lim, you don't understand. Do you? I didn't either until now."

"What don't I understand?" Lim asked. "I know we were not told about this, but they take samples from everybody."

"Lim, do you want to be bonded. To have a mate?"

"Ugh, no," was the answer. A very standard Irken answer.

"How about having a smeet?" Tak asked.

"WHAT?" Lim nearly screeched.

"Check the records if you dare. You will probably find you have had several offspring made in the smeet factories. Their DNA is engineered and reassembled, but the egg cell as a whole…" Tak left the rest unspoken.

Lim looked at the computer terminal as if all the horrors of the universe were waiting to spring out at any moment. It might have not been far from the truth. _Me? Offspring_? Lim thought. Somehow she felt violated. It was so unnatural. Like having her eyes opened to that knowledge made her less Irken than before.

She left the compartment in a hurry. Ten minutes after she was done vomiting she opened up a communications channel throughout the ship. A long list of names was read off followed by "drop what you are doing and report to squadron ready room three at once."

* * *

Tak was in the equipment room putting on the final pieces of her powered armor. A stubby particle pulse rifle was leaning next to her and several stun grenades were hung from clips on her suit. Mimi was sitting next to her.

Lim walked in and leaned against a bulkhead. "So what's your plan?" she asked.

"The smeet factories are deep underground, but the raw material depositories are closer to the surface. I go in to the lobby and start demanding my egg sac as a bondmate while Mimi sneaks in. She locates the stasis unit, alters the records to indicate it as disposed of, and she takes it out of there before I get thrown out by security. And wearing this, it will take a lot to throw me out."

"Doable." Lim said. "Upfront, public, loud, but clean. And then everybody will know who you are. You're still supposed to be on Dirt. They could ship you back there."

"I know, but I don't have many options. Besides, Dib can always come back to get me. Speaking of Dib, does he know about any of this?"

"We've kept this quiet. He's in his next class. You know those classes are more popular that he realizes? Some of the guys like to watch his skin change colors by figuring out the most awkward questions to ask. And the more they learn, the more awkward the questions get."

"I will have to remember to tell him when I get back." She paused. "Can you make sure he's distracted for the next few hours?" Tak asked. "He would try to stop me."

"There will be one of the home movies right after, so no one should notice a thing. Except perhaps the light attendance," Lim replied. She opened up a locker and removed her own standard body armor, double side arms and a pilot's helmet.

"Sentinel Lim? What are you doing?" Tak asked.

"Suiting up. What does it look like I'm doing?"

"But why?"

Lim began putting on the battle jacket. "Two males and a female. One of the males went missing three years ago while on patrol. No one bothered to even go look for him. The other died of injuries during training. The female is a smallest. Cleans out the main sewer system. I don't want to know her name or what she looks like, but I had a message sent about a job in the life support section. She'll be better off with us on Earth. Beyond that I don't want to care. I'm still Irken."

"Lim-" Tak broke off. She should have kept her thoughts to herself.

The other Irken female adjusted the light body armor around her torso. "Some of the others are doing something similar. The ones that accept jobs will meet one of the cargo shuttles at the spaceport while we're out. But we're doing this without authorization. We want you to speak to Lady Gaz in our behalf if she wants them sent back. This is our price, Tak."

"The price for what?" she asked.

Lim snapped her fingers. About two dozen other Irken females entered the compartment and began suiting up in either body armor or powered armor. Weapons were hauled out and checked. "For opening up some more options for your little operation. I've got two assault shuttles being prepped and loaded with ordinance. The only condition is that you act the part of the General and stay out of the way. Leave any grunt work to us. You are at very high risk of compromising your ability to reason. Not to mention your physical condition. That could blow the whole thing and we can't have that."

* * *

Beed caught up to Lim as thirty seven armored Irken females filed into the maintenance bay and toward the waiting assault shuttles.

"Lim, when one of the guys told me that the whole female complement was looking really ticked off and was loading up to do some serious damage, I had to see for myself." He glanced over at the shuttles. He did a double take at the air-to-surface missile pods slung under the stubby wing pylons, and the figures running systems checks within the side turrets holding the rapid-cycle plasma cannons.

Beed caught Lim by the arm. "Lim, what is going on-" He broke off at the haunted look in her eyes.

Lim checked the power cell in one of her side arms. "Beed. Let it go. It's something Tak discovered and believe me, you don't want to know. If anyone asks, us girls are just taking her out for some group therapy."

"Therapy?" Beed asked. That was an Earth word. Two suits of powered armor stomped by, each carrying a riot control heavy weapons flechette launcher. The kind that was belt fed rather than using an attached magazine.

"Yeah," Lim responded. "Therapy. Irken style."

* * *

Two Earth-gray Irken assault shuttles broke through the cloud cover over the facility. Side doors on the craft opened up. "We're ready." Lim called from the pilot's seat to Tak, who was in the middle of the craft.

Tak's armor whined as she bent down to look at Mimi. The feline form looked back. "You understand what you have to do?" she asked again.

Mimi merely squinted with those red eyes, as if to say 'Of course. Just like the last five times you asked.'

"Execute," Tak ordered.

Mimi dropped her holographic feline disguise and hurled herself out of the shuttle. The robot deployed the jet turbines from her legs and shot toward the building below.

"She's out!" Tak yelled.

"Transponder change! Comms live!" Lim yelled back. The transponder codes of the shuttles changed from transport to military intercept. "All vehicles in the vicinity of sector five-nine-eight. Rouge SIR unit on the loose. Clear all traffic. This is now a no-fly zone. Repeat. Rouge SIR unit on the loose. Clear all traffic. Retrieval squad engaging now."

Traffic around them scattered, just as predicted. A rouge SIR unit was a terrifying thing. The assault shuttles circled back around and dove after Mimi.

"He's heading for the repository! I have a firing solution!" radioed the second shuttle.

Tak keyed into the communications net. "All units weapons free. Take the shot."

Four air-to-ground missiles broke free from the second shuttle and blasted after Mimi. She dodged at the last second, and the missile spread streaked down and impacted its actual target. Auxiliary atmospheric pumps covering a ventilation shaft leading down into the repository. The apparatus exploded, leaving a giant hole which Mimi sailed through and down inside.

"Check your fire!" Tak ordered. "The unit is inside the building. We'll have to do this the hard way. Shuttle two land on the roof and secure the airspace. Your squads move in and follow it down. Shuttle one land at the entrance. Heavy weapons units secure the entry points. Nothing gets in and nothing robotic leaves. My squads move in, ground floor."

* * *

The security supervisor behind the array of computer terminals on the ground floor looked up as a vibration shook the building. Intruder alarms sounded on his display. Then his eyes grew wide as debris thudded onto the ground outside and a rather un-Irken colored assault shuttle landed. Troops launched themselves out of hatches and the rear loading ramp, flowing into the lobby and toward him.

"You!" one of the armored forms hollered in his direction.

All their armor was of various shades of gray, mottled in misshapen blotches that formed no discernable pattern. Like a painting droid had gone crazy and no one cared. Except for what appeared to be unit patches. The silhouettes of black sheep holding baseball bats. Not that any Irken would recognize what is was. The mysterious and very lumpy silhouette could be mistaken for something other than fluffy and harmless. But there was no mistaking a very blunt and unsophisticated weapon in its hands.

But the one speaking, the tallest of the short soldiers moving toward him, was different. The armor coloring was the same, but on the breast was a purple Irken military symbol with a large spear stabbed up the center. It was very easy to imagine it as an Irken skull mounted on a pike. "Your facility has been infiltrated by a rouge SIR unit. It thinks snacks are invading this sector. Who is the supervisor here?"

The guard behind the desk spoke up. "I am the duty supervisor, but It's my first day. Who are you?" He gestured to their oddly colored armor. "I don't recognize-"

"Of course not!" the taller one bellowed. "Would you want to be recognized as military if you were sent after a SIR unit?" She leaned over the desk and into his face. "You have no idea how fortunate you are that we were nearby. Now evacuate all non-essential personnel."

He couldn't see much past the armor. Only the face through the clear plate of her helmet. But this Irken's posture, her aura in the way she spoke and commanded said _elite_. "Second squad!" she barked. "Secure every transport shaft leading past this floor. First squad set up my command post."

"Yes, General," came the responses.

The supervisor's face paled as his fingers entered commands on his terminal. _A general_? A SIR unit was horrific enough, but if a general was needed to go after it-

The general's attention was directed toward him once more. "Supervisor! Open up the access shafts to the lower levels for my third squad. I want them to setup a snare beam down there in case it gets past your security and my troops."

"But General," the supervisor said. "No one is allowed down in the lower levels. That's where we store-" Something about the look she gave him halted him before he could complete the sentence.

"Let me make this absolutely clear," the female general spoke down at him in a tone that would have frozen the tectonic drift of continents. "That SIR unit is the most advanced there is. It will slice it's way through barriers and walls. It will access any lift and ventilation shaft necessary to sweep this building. That includes the lower levels. Right now it has identified snacks as the enemy, but it might not know what snacks _are_. If it gets down there, what do you think it might do to the storage area if there is a misidentification?"

The supervisor's face turned white. It was his first day. He had pulled on his feet, stretched, meditated on growth, even hung upside down by his feet for ten years before he had finally become tall enough to become a supervisor. And now this happens on his first day.

Then one of the armored figures said something that sealed his sense of doom. "General. The Governor and our Lady did not send an energy snare generator with us."

_Oh, Irk!_ This was a Governor's Own unit. Probably even a rapid reaction team.

Another voice echoed out of the General's armor. "Sir! The SIR unit has broken through the seventh floor." The sound of sporadic weapons fire could be heard. "Every snack machine was destroyed. It's still using the ventilation shafts."

The supervisor spoke up as non-essential Irken work drones flowed past them and out of the facility. "General. There are ten snare units on the third floor. My security teams can get them out."

The general moved around the desk and stood over him looking at a schematic of the building. "Have two brought down to the lower levels for third squad. Deploy the rest at the lift shafts and these locations," she said pointing out corridor intersections on several floors. "And open up those access hatches so third squad can get in position! Have two more of your squads join them."

"General." Another voice sounded over the suit's communications as the supervisor complied with the given orders. It was either that or let the SIR unit run amok. The storage area was too valuable. "The SIR unit is learning. It's running along conduits for the security systems. If we shoot we will damage them."

"Do what you have to do," the general ordered.

Naturally the supervisor never realized the video and audio pickups in Tak's armor was transmitting what was displayed and heard at his terminal on a private and scrambled frequency.

* * *

Mimi disemboweled another snack machine on the fourth floor with her clawed hand and leapt away in time for blaster fire from her 'pursuers' to finish it off. Several other snack machines, chairs, surveillance pickups, and security locks had met similar fates. Locks especially had a high rate of friendly fire. The rest was cover up damage.

The SIR unit bounded across the corridor and into an intersection.

"There it is!" came a cry from two gray armored figures.

Mimi jumped, put a fist into the wall and swung around the corner before energy blasts burned into the floor. She landed horizontally onto the door in the crossing corridor and it broke open. The robot landed on the large computer system in the room, reaching over and throwing a now unconscious guard out the now doorless arch in the wall.

"EMP Grenade!" came a shout. It was an order, but also a warning to Mimi.

A cutting laser from Mimi's eyes sliced into a shaft behind the wall. She knew it was there from the telemetry she was receiving by way of Tak's view of the supervisor's terminal display. A flashing blue grenade bounced into the room, and the robot scrambled inside the duct and down the tube to the next floor. She powered down with a three second delayed reboot.

A pulse of invisible EM energy flared in the room above and washed through adjacent rooms and floors, including Mimi's location. A second later Mimi powered back up. The security memory core up above was now a sophisticated assembly of slag. There would be no record of today's mayhem. _Secondary objective achieved_ flashed her mission profile.

Mimi carefully opened a vent and shifted back into her holographic feline form before quietly climbing out. The lighting had gone out from the EMP burst, and a black cat in a black room was easy to miss. There were several squads by the lift, and the shadow silently swooped backward and to the equipment sitting behind them. An access panel was opened and the stealthy form slid inside the energy snare's containment capsule. The backup lighting kicked on, illuminating the halls once more.

"Hurry up!" one of the guards said in a voice of urgency. They picked up the device, along with it's passenger, and carried it into the lift and down to the lower levels.

* * *

The supervisor waited nervously. Things had gone quiet for almost fifteen minutes now. Every squad in the building was roaming each floor, searching for the intruder. The then communications went wild.

"Contact!" came a shrill voice, followed by several smacks and a heavy thump that sounded suspiciously like an unconscious body dropping to the floor.

"It's in the lower level entrance!" called another voice over the sound of weapons fire.

"Don't shoot! You'll hit the storage pods!" came an order.

"You tell it that!" came the response.

"Snare Emitter one charged!"

"Fire!"

"You missed you idiot!"

"No, you missed!"

"Emitter Two charged!"

"Fire!"

"Missed again!"

"You're an idiot!"

A more familiar voice to Tak's hearing came over the communications frequency. "Throw stun grenades. Keep it's attention on us and away from the storage pods."

Several loud thumps echoed though the open channel.

"It's really ticked off! It's heading straight for us!"

More weapons fire.

"Emitter one charged! Firing!"

"Got it! Reeling it in. Activating containment field."

"General, Third squad. We have it. The SIR unit is struggling, but losing power fast. Someone must have winged it."

Tak keyed into her communications. "Good work. Hold your position until the unit is down. Then fall back to the shuttles for immediate departure." She turned to the supervisor. "We value your cooperation. It made accomplishing our mission much easier. In fact it was essential."

The relieved supervisor beamed. He probably wouldn't have if he had known about the real mission behind the statement.

* * *

The snare's containment vessel sat on the deck of the crowded shuttle as they lifted up out of the atmosphere. It hummed with blue light within the caged frame. Mimi's robotic body lay inert within the field.

Lim called from the pilot's seat. "General Membrane? Tak? I couldn't believe my eyes how that all fell into place. How can you plan around so much improvising like that? If that is what you are like now, I'd hate to have been on the receiving end before you, you know. Lost so much. You really are elite, you know that?"

Tak had been waiting for such an acknowledgement for most of her life. But now? Now it seemed almost immaterial. She merely gave some comment of acceptance. There was something more important on her mind right now.

She reached down to shut off the containment field and opened the frame. Mimi's eyes flashed red, and the SIR unit climbed out of the opened cage and sat before her Mistress.

"Did you get it?" Tak asked.

The SIR unit opened its head and pulled out a small stasis field container. Tak took it within her hands. Inside floated a pinkish organ with an oval shape. There was a spot where it once attached to a large tubule leading to her body, and another indicating where it had been repaired. This was her last egg sac.

"And the records? Did you alter them to indicate my egg sac was disposed of?"

Mimi's holographic form took hold, and eyes blinked with a slight nod of the head.

Tak's vision blurred until she couldn't see anything at all. Irk had taken everything from her until nothing was left. Now for the first time she had taken something back. Something taken that rightfully belonged to her mate.

"Thank you," she sobbed in her joy. "Thank you all."

The other Irkens looked at each other. This was a very non-Irken response.

Lim spoke over her shoulder. "It's a bondmate thing. We won't understand." She looked out of her side viewport at the cargo shuttle being escorted back to the _Doomwind_ by the two returning assault shuttles. _But then perhaps a part of us does_, she thought. _Maybe we all went to take back a piece of ourselves._

She opened up a channel. "_Doomwind_, this is Black Sheep Two. ETA seventeen minutes. Three shuttles. Please quietly have the bio-technician standing by in the medical bay. It's a personal matter for the General. She will skin you alive if you put it out there for the whole ship to hear."

* * *

Beed met Lim in the maintenance bay after the shuttles had docked and began offloading. A few Irkens used modified grav lifts to remove unused ordinance and deposit the three remaining missile pods on a pallet, which was carried away down a large shaft back to the blast-proof bunker where such hazardous weapons were designed to be kept. New arrivals walked across the deck, gawking.

"Lim?" he asked, pulling her aside. She was towing some powered armor and a stack of weapons on a hand lift behind her. Other armored figures were leaving the bay and heading back to the armory. "How was this 'therapy' you took General Tak on?"

"It's General Tak Membrane now. Some bondmate thing. Anyway it went perfect. No hitches."

"Want to fill me in on what is going on?"

"Not really," she replied. "I don't want to think about it."

"Okay. Then who are they?" he asked, pointing to the new arrivals.

"That is what I don't want to think about. Get them settled in for us. Okay, Beed?" she asked.

"Lim!" Beed said forcefully. "Lady Gaz is trying to stockpile supplies so we don't have to come back. But our numbers keep increasing. We're not going to have enough space for more supplies. Not to mention the concern the humans will have about so many of us being on their world. We Irkens have a reputation you know."

Yat came up to Lim. She wasn't watching her volume as much as the other two. "Lim! I saw him. I didn't mean to. I didn't want to! Didn't want to know what he looks like or anything. But I saw him. He has blue eyes too! You know how rare that is. It can't be a coincidence."

"Sentinel Yat, go put your gear away," Lim told her. "Spread word that the female contingent is to take six hours of PAK maintenance as of now. Take turns if you have to, but that is an order."

"Lim," Beed started after Yat walked away. "What is going on with you? I know you took off for Irk and you are short one missile pod. You bring up new arrivals with no notice, need, or even permission? You didn't even give me an advisory warning! And now mandatory PAK maintenance? For _six hours_?"

"You want to know what's going on?" Lim hissed in a whisper. "They took our egg sacs and made smeets with them! We know they are made in the factories, but we didn't how or the implications! I have offspring, Beed. One survivor. A female. That is who these new ones are. They're _ours_. They took something from us. We couldn't, Beed. We couldn't let this go. But Tak? She's a bondmate. She almost went berserk and was going to go down there armed and alone. She saw it as a flagrant violation of her _bond._"

She saw the look of growing nausea on Beed's face. Then terror at the last bit about violating Tak's bond. It was easy to imagine that an Irken bondmate might burn a planet for something like that. "It's taken care of. We recovered her last egg sac in a way that had them thanking us we robbed them, and they think it's destroyed. Tak's better now. As for how Lady Gaz would react to all this, I think she'd call our response restrained compared how she'd retaliate. You remember in the movie we were shown how she responded when an animal left waste in her yard? Imagine if she had been _harvested_ like we were."

Beed didn't say anything. He didn't know how to react. Lim went on. "Some of us offered our offspring jobs here. They don't know. We won't tell them who they come from. It's bad enough we have to live with this. No one else should have to." There was a pause. "I don't know why we did this. Something in me needed to give my female a chance at something before she died like my males did. My PAK isn't handling this, Beed. I don't think it was meant to. I don't want to know which one she is. I don't want to care. I don't want to lose what makes me Irken. Oh, IRK! Yat? Yat knows which one is her offspring. I can't imagine how she can handle that."

"Lim, you're in shock. Take all the time you females need. Stay in the maintenance cycle for a week if you need too. I'll try to make contingency plans in case we need to leave Irk space in a hurry." Something in Beed was telling him it was a good thing they were leaving for Earth in three days.

* * *

Tak looked at the bio-technician after he finished his work. There was a nerve block patch near the bottom of her rib cage. She lay on her back on the examination table. Scanning arms hovered over her abdomen.

"The organ appears healthy, and the repair had been done acceptably well. Circulation is good, and the attaching tissues are holding. The main tubule has been mended and is healing. However, you are at risk now. This organ is very fragile. Any impact to this region could rupture the sac lining. No Irken has had those enzymes released into their systems."

The Irken stopped and looked at Tak. "Sir, I'm just a technician. I run the machines and analyze the results. I can make broad repairs. But this is a specialized field, and I'm not sure anyone has ever looked into this. I certainly haven't. I've never even examined an egg sac before. No Irken in living memory has done this, Tak. There is no telling what will happen."

"I have done some research, but it is very limited," she informed him. "Mostly an overview of the organ function itself. Not really on how it works in detail." She wasn't going to go into particulars with just anyone.

"Tak? Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked. "If you go into combat… you just can't. Never again. Even a minor fall could rupture the organ. You could end up having to wear body armor at all times to keep it intact. I can still remove the organ-"

She interrupted the technician. "I will accept this. My studies indicate that the egg sac is supposed to be that way and would reseal itself." She looked at the technician. "I developed my egg sacs naturally while a smeet. Their removal when I graduated from smeethood was not. They were not _ejected_ as part of my development. They were cut out of me."

The technician looked very uncomfortable. For him, this was a mystery organ. But it was medically part of a female Irken's anatomy. Sort of. They were removed after all. Not put back in. He figured there was a reason for that.

"What about inside?" Tak asked.

"There is a single egg cell contained within the central area. The cell however was indeed damaged. It does not seem viable. The tear in the cellular wall is extensive, but not enough to cause it to burst open. How it managed to continue this long outside of stasis to run even a single scan is a mystery to me. But I was trained for battle damage repair and organ trauma regeneration. Severe injuries. Not… this."

"I understand. A few weeks ago I would have probably been insisting on its removal, not its restoration. But that was before I was bonded. It changes things. When will I be released?"

"Tak, you've just have what amounts to an organ transplant. You still need at least forty five minutes of accelerated regeneration before you can stand. And somehow I doubt all you will do is stand up. Plus you have been skimping on your PAK maintenance. That is not optional for you, Tak. Three hours minimum here. Plus another three once you get back to your quarters. Understood?"

His patient nodded, and the technician set up the maintenance cycle. As Tak went to sleep, the technician pondered to himself. He was really outside of his field here. Plus it was an area of research no Irken had any business examining. He was having enough trouble keeping his lunch on the inside. But if he asked just _where_ she had recovered her own egg sac, his guts might not remain inside of him either. Some things were just better left unknown.

* * *

Earth local time: Slightly before lunch. Irken local time: Later than that.

Dib finally found her in _Doomwind_'s fire control center. It was a small spherical chamber deep within the island superstructure of the vessel. The curving walls made up a single display of surrounding space in all directions. Two chairs were positioned below and to either side of a central one. These positions guided direction to priority threats for the port and starboard point defense batteries while the raised central chair assigned targets for the tactical computers in the secondary energy turrets.

It also made an excellent observation lounge and Tak was standing in front of the chairs looking out into displayed space.

"There you are," Dib said, moving to stand next to her. "I've been looking for you. No one knew where you went."

The latest home movie and the resulting lengthy and awkward discussions afterward had ended nearly an hour ago. He had to admit that their household was not a good example of acceptable human behavior. Tonight's scene had been one from years ago. It showed Dib running from Gaz's flesh eating security dolls after he had given her a Werewolf Barbie doll as a present, and her yelling "That's not a doll. _These_ are dolls! And keep your paranormal crap out of my toys!" It seemed Gaz had many qualities that an Irken could relate to.

Tak didn't take her eyes off of the ringed pink planet that hung before her. "I needed some space. I have had a lot to think about today."

It sounded like he wasn't supposed to say anything in response, so Dib took in the view. "It is an amazing sight."

"I had to go down there today," Tak commented. "I never want to see that cursed planet again."

The human didn't know what to say to that. But if she had to go down to the surface and deal with hordes of Irkens, her stress levels must be through the roof. "Are you all right?" he asked.

Purple eyes closed for a minute. "Better now. I just realized my PAK is unmistakably defective now. It's high level behavior governors apparently are not functioning at all any more. Probably haven't for years. At least since I nearly went insane on Dirt."

Dib pulled her close to comfort her. A defective PAK was devastating news to an Irken. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," she told him. "I'm glad. It's allowing me to consider and do things that I couldn't have before. It least it's not like Zim's PAK which is wholly defective."

Dib pulled away to look down at Tak. She looked up at him. "Dib, you need us defined, don't you? Because humans have so many different kinds of bonding where we Irkens only have one. The things that regulate your behavior is confused at the moment because you have not had your rituals."

He supposed that would be what it looked like from an outside perspective. Tak didn't stop. "You have kept saying that you are trying to do right by me. I didn't understand what that meant before. I do now. It was your way of showing me respect and honoring me as a wounded mate. And a few other things I had no concept of. But I looked some things up today. I think I understand better now."

_Oh jeez_, Dib thought. "Tak, you didn't have to do that. Gosh, what you must think. I know that to an Irken-"

"Dib, shut up," Tak insisted. "When I bonded to you, my mind was permanently altered. Your biology does not disgust me. It can be disturbing at first, but I adapt quickly." The shorter Irken put both her hands on her taller Human's shoulders. "Dib, you need something clearly defined because of the circumstances we are in. Different worlds have different definitions for what we are. It is confusing you. Let me make it clear for you in human terms."

She looked into his eyes. "When I bonded to you and put on this necklace-" She gestured to the one around her neck. "-you became my Human husband. I may not clearly know what this role entails, but that is what you are. When you accepted me and your bonding necklace, you accepted me as your Irken wife. That is what I am. This _fiancée_ thing is for how your society would see us until your authorities filed their slow paperwork and we had a social recognition ritual. But we are not on Earth and our bonding had nothing to do with their laws. Every other planet recognizes us for what we are, even if you have not completed your own bonding cycle yet. It is okay to have a reaction in your biochemistry when you bathe me. I understand what that can mean to a human now. You don't have to pretend you don't in order to shield me. It is okay to see me dress. It's not wrong to treat me as your wife. I want you to."

Dib took her into his arms and hugged her tightly. Any other Irken would have killed him long ago just for that. But Tak… Tak was different. Tak was bonded to him. Tak was special.

The Irken looked at the ring on her finger. "My Human, I am grateful that you made me your Earthly 'fiancée,' for it was your human way of promising me that you will not abandon me, and that you wish to go through your needed ritual on Earth. But that does not change that we are in an Irken 'marriage,' to use a human term."

Actually, this conversation (or was it a lecture?) answered the question he had sought her out to ask. It was Tunaghost's last suggestion, but it was sound.

"So, I take it you wouldn't mind if we went on a date?" the human asked.

Dib offered Tak his arm. She accepted it and walked with him out the door, turning her back on her native homeworld displayed behind them.

* * *

Dib made his arrangements. They were fairly pathetic for a first date, but the couple was on a warship in the vacuum of space. He spread one of their blankets out on the deck plates of their quarters. A container of honey for Tak. A bag of trail mix and dried peaches with a bottle of water for himself. Plus a small human flashlight he had brought along for atmosphere sitting up on the middle of the blanket. French cuisine and candlelight it was not, but it was the best he could do with what he had.

He stood up and examined his last minute handiwork. On a good day, any human girl would probably laugh at this and walk away. And that would be before he opened his fat mouth about his paranormal work and the existence of aliens.

A door opened and someone walked in. He heard Tak's voice. "Mimi. Wait outside the door and make sure we are not disturbed." The door closed as Dib turned to look. He did a double take.

Her holographic human disguise was active, and her bob cut blue hair waved as she moved. Her PAK was still visible as the hologram's ability had deteriorated after her long stay on Dirt. It couldn't extend beyond her skin to include attire, but it worked well enough. This human looking Tak wore the red silky 'woo-a-mate' outfit Gaz had sent along with some other clothes. The backless halter top fit snuggly around her PAK and seamlessly extended down into a knee length skirt.

"Tak what are you-?" Dib started to ask.

"We will be on Earth soon. I will need this appearance most of the time." She paused. "Besides," Tak said quietly, "I wanted to look healthy for our first date. Not like a malnourished 'alien' survivor."

Dib nodded his understanding, and held out his hand for her to join him on the floor.

They ate, talked about technology (Dib on propulsion and sensors, Tak on weapons and counter-weapons), how Dib's day went (awkwardly). He shared a few jokes and Tak even laughed at one or two. The date wore on and snack supplies and conversation topics dwindled.

"Dib?" Tak asked, sitting across from him. The upright flashlight separated them on the blanket. "I need to talk to you about something."

"Sounds kind of ominous," Dib commented. "Does this mean our date is over?"

"I don't want it to be. I like this 'date' thing. But I not sure how to approach you about this."

Dib motioned Tak closer, and the human disguised form slid over and snuggled next to him. She began. "Dib, about this dreaming you've been having-"

_Oh god_, Dib thought. _Not again._

"-I am glad it was of me. It is unIrken of me to think that, but I am. Something within you desires to be my mate. It is true that I did not know what that meant for a human, so I started researching. I discovered why you seemed uncomfortable bathing me, why you kept talking about being detached. Dib, do not worry anymore. You have done well by me, because I _was_ naïve."

"Tak, don't worry about it," Dib said. "It's true the biologic triggers are largely automatic, but it doesn't have to go anywhere. It's a choice, not a requirement. I don't ask anything of you, Tak. I know Irkens don't do that sort of thing. And I've bathed you enough to know you are probably a female drone. It's okay. I can accept-"

He stopped at the intense hurt look in her human looking eyes.

"Dib. I didn't just look into human biology. I examined my own as well. They took my egg sacs. Made me a drone. I got so angry. But then I got jealously angry for you. If they had made smeets with them, I think I would have started an orbital bombardment of Irk."

The human didn't know what to say, but knew any female would have felt such an instinctive violation over such a thing. And Tak had suffered so much already, and was not speaking figuratively about an orbital bombardment. He pulled the disguised Irken closer and placed his chin on her blue holographic hair in comfort.

Tak kept going. "I realized I was jealous because I saw those egg sacs as rightfully yours, Dib. My mate's. But they were destroyed in an accident. Only one exists now, and it was damaged and lost."

"I'm sorry, Tak," Dib told her. And he was. Truly sorry.

"Dib, I made a decision. Perhaps I should have talked to you first, but I went down to Irk to deal with this."

_Great. The armada is next door too. I wonder how much of a head start we have_? Dib thought. "How bad was it?" he asked.

"It was difficult to pretend to be calm, but the other females were with me. They did all the real effort while I stayed back. The egg sac is registered as destroyed, so no one will go looking for it."

Dib let out a sigh, partly out of relief that Tak hadn't blown up a good chunk of a planet in retaliation, but a large part for the disguised Irken in his arms.

"When I got back, I followed through with my decision. I had the surgery to have it transplanted back where it belongs."

_Wait. What? Pause, rewind, attempting playback._

"The egg cell itself was torn, and labeled as unsuitable. It is probably lost already. But the rest of the organ is healthy. However because it is easily ruptured, I am no longer cleared for frontline duty."

Dib finally got some words out. Some new concepts were still catching up. "Tak? You gave up… But all your life… You sacrificed…" He wasn't speaking coherently.

Tak understood anyway. "I know. I'm just a staff officer now. But it's okay, Dib. Lim complemented me that I was elite. I've been waiting for that my whole life. But it didn't mean anything compared to having my egg sac back for my bondmate. I did this for you, Dib. Your biology has been seeking out my egg sac when you sleep. But I can't be receptive."

Dib held her close. "It's alright, Tak."

"I want you to be my husband, Dib. To treat me as your wife, who happens to be Irken. Not like an alien."

"I know Tak. I know. I will. Wait- what are you talking-"

"I did the research. I know the procedure is invasive and will be disturbing at first. I choose to accept this."

Dib pulled away to put some space between them. "Tak? Do you know what you sound like you are asking for?"

Tak reached for his hand. She placed it high on her abdomen. Dib felt something there. Under the slight red cloth, the flesh and muscle fibers that was far too thin to indicate a healthy diet of past years, was a hard knob of an organ.

"That's your-?" he asked.

She nodded. "My egg sac. It rightfully belongs to my bondmate."

"But Tak, I'm from a completely different planet-" Dib started to say.

"Don't you think that is blatantly obvious to me?" Tak said, her eyes watering. "You're an alien too, Dib. You're supposed to be an inferior species. You're not the only one facing issues with this. I'm betraying everything it means to be Irken just by talking to you about this. But to steal and put my egg sac back in my body for my alien bondmate? I shouldn't be doing any of this even if you were Irken!"

"Tak," Dib said softly, placing his other hand in hers. "Are you sure about this? We don't have to. You can change your mind."

Tak's human disguised eyes closed tightly, and Dib felt her abdominal muscles contract under his hand. After another second the knob under his hand softened as he felt a pop vibrate through her thin flesh. She opened her eyes slowly with a slight smile.

"What just happened?" Dib asked. Partly of alarm and partly of fascination.

"I just ruptured my egg sac," Tak explained. "It is now leaking enzymes."

"Are you going to be okay?" Dib asked in concern. Organ rupture did not sound like a good thing.

Tak looked into his eyes warmly. "Yes. But in a little while a section of my abdomen will start to dilate. I am about to go into a mating cycle."

"All this because I had a dream?" Dib asked, a tear in his eye.

Tak gave him a look that said such a pathetically simplistic explanation was ludicrous.

A former enemy alien- no. His Irken wife Tak was sacrificing everything she had previously held dear for him. Because he was her bondmate. Well, there were other reasons too, but he was the big one. He was the reason for deliberately rupturing her egg sac. Dib pulled his wife close.

"But, Tak. I'm not in love with you yet. I mean I will someday, but this is something humans do when they love each-"

Tak gently put a finger on his lips to shut him up. "Dib," she said softly. "I'm Irken. Irkens don't love. We bond. I don't expect us to be the same and somewhere in your brainmeat you know that. We can accept this. As for you, you care for me, show respect for me in a weird human way, tend my mental wounds. You rescued me, and look to my needs everyday. You worry over me. Have shown too much concern to 'do right' by me. What do you call that? If that isn't this 'love' then what is?"

Dib let out a sigh. She was right. "I'm really nervous about this, Tak. It's a major step to take."

Tak rested her forehead on his human nose and wrapped her antennae along his scalp. "I know, Dib," she whispered. "I'm uneasy too. I am the sickest deviant in the history of Irk. But I want this to happen."

Somehow this made Dib feel better, not because of her unease but because he shared in it. "You're not sick, Tak. We're bonded."

They just sat there holding each other on the blanketed deck in their quarters for a minute. "Dib," Tak inquired. "In your dream was I Human or Irken? Because I can keep the hologram on if it makes it easier for your brainmeat to accept this."

He didn't really answer the question. "You can turn it off, Tak."

"Good. You can bathe me then," Tak suggested in a tone he had never heard before. "It will take time for the enzymes to take effect, and I would like to be clean and relaxed when they do."

_Oh dear lord. Just where was she looking when she researched this?_

* * *

PAK maintenance cables retracted and Tak stretched out in their hammock next to Dib, careful not to disturb his sleep and luxuriating in so much skin-on-skin contact. There had been a lot to figure out. They both were clueless on a practical level, not to mention different species. And their experience had been different. Her human seemed to go through something far more intense than herself. But then she had been designed to endure intense long-term combat conditions without batting an eye, so perhaps she was just more resilient.

She had been expecting intrusiveness, invasiveness. To be disturbed. Perhaps to be conquered in some way. But instead of intrusiveness; appeal and welcoming. Instead of invasiveness; joining and tenderness. A closeness beyond comprehension. Rather than disturbing; mere strangeness turning into shared weirdness, then an awkward yet intimate naturalness.

Tak felt within her abdomen the human mating goo left there. She knew that earlier in her life she would most likely have been gutting herself to get the contamination out, or have simply killed herself in disgust for what she had just done with a human. Yet such concepts were also beyond her mental framework now. No longer part of her universe. Tak was _happy_ with her mate's presence within her. Her nerve endings felt they were dancing in contact with the foreign enzymes. It was very pleasant to experience. Pleasant to know they were now a part of each other.

Her immune system would no doubt neutralize the foreign substances within her, but her body would absorb what had been deposited. Instead of making her sick, she was content to think that as making her a tiny part human. Tak knew that wasn't how things worked in real life, but the thought made her feel as one with her mate. She had had enough of anything Irken to last several lifetimes.

_Oh, I am truly a sick deviant_, she thought to herself. _And I'm glad. Why would I want to be normal? This is so much better._ The thoughts warmed her soul as memories came back to her.

She groaned softly, thinking about how she just did NOT want to get up so very much. Tak slowly turned and got up out of the hammock, picking up the clothes off of the floor. It would not do to leave things a mess. She put articles back where they belonged. This wasn't Dirt, after all.

A scrubbing with cleansing gel followed. Dib had gotten rather sweaty and had dabbed both of them down with a towel regularly before the moisture became concentrated enough to start to burn her skin. That had slowed things down, but it had added to the experience. But the smell of their mating remained on her, and Tak had a training session soon. It would not be prudent to go in smelling like _that_.

Tak stepped out of the shower stall and saw the pair of human eyes looking in her direction. She couldn't help but smile as she put on her gray fatigues. "You're not averting your eyes anymore."

"Seems kind of silly to look away now."

They weren't to the point of flirtatious talk on the order of 'do you like what you see' or other such things.

"I'm glad."

"Me too."

Dib sat up on the hammock and let his feet dangle over the floor. "Are you alright?"

"Yes. I feel… right. Whole. You?"

"I feel… different. Good, but different."

"I know what you mean," Tak said as she pulled on her boots. She looked at her mate. It was a wonderful word. With all sorts of subtleties and meanings attached to it. Like a whole new horizon had been opened up to her. She went over and ran her antennae through his hair, taking in his scent. "You can go back to sleep if you want. I'm on duty in ten minutes, but I'll be back soon."

"Tak?" Dib called after her as the Irken approached the door. She paused. "You're not alien to me. Not any more. You're my Irken wife."

Tak beamed at him, his formal acceptance. "And you're my Human husband. Dib, I enjoyed our date. I hope we can go on another soon."

"We will," he smiled at her. "You do know that dating doesn't always lead to… you know." Dib blushed.

Tak blushed as well. "It doesn't mean it can't," she said with a mischievous smile. The Irken stepped through the now open doorway and turned into the corridor as Mimi in her feline holographic form swept into the room.

The door closed as Mimi flowed up and onto the hammock, squinting at Dib as if to say 'What did you DO to my Mistress?'

"Uh, Mimi. I think I've created a monster."

Red eyes blinked.

"She's my mate. I may or may not be _in_ love, but I do love her. I'm thankful she's doing better." He wasn't sure what to say to the SIR unit, but it seemed better than nothing. And it was the truth.

Mimi walked along the hammock slowly, and curled up on the blankets where Tak had been. Red eyes peered at the human, and then closed. Sort of like saying, 'I'm keeping my eye on you, but you'll live. For now,-' Dib startled when the holographic feline head bumped his side. '-Master.'

* * *

"Grab! Pivot! Throw! Recover!" Tak hollered. "Again! Grab! Pivot! Throw! Recover!"

She was walking among pairs of Irken crew going through basic hand-to-hand drills. It wasn't complicated, just throws and tumbles to condition soldiers to not only toss an opponent, but also to recover quickly from being thrown themselves. They were in the ship's mess hall, which had been converted into a training area. It was one of the largest compartments not dedicated to ship operations or storage. Not that it was giant, but large enough for fifty Irkens to take turns throwing each other onto the floor.

"You! Spread your feet further apart. Shoulder forward. That's better. Come on, Black Sheep! This may not be invader school, but you're Gaz's Own! I expect more than just adequate from you. And I'm not seeing adequate yet. Again! Grab! Pivot! Throw! Recover!"

Another set of Irkens tumbled onto the deck plates. Tak had elected not to put down excess packing materials on the floor to use as padding. It cluttered up the place, and was a pain to pick up and return all the way back into one of the cargo bays. "All right. That is enough for today. Now get out of my sight!"

Tak left the mess hall and walked down the corridors. She absent-mindedly scratched her belly. The previous sensations of dancing nerve endings had given way to an itching. It was probably just her body adjusting to the recent changes or mending after what she had just put it through. Perhaps it was her egg sac resealing itself as it was supposed to.

Lim caught up to her. "General Membrane. I watched your training session today. I hope that was you in a good mood."

Tak nodded as she continued her walk. "Yes. That was a good mood. My husband planned a date with me. It was… very enjoyable."

"Husband?"

"Human word for the male bondmate. I am his wife." There was a smirk in Tak's eyes.

They walked on a bit farther. Lim wasn't really interested in language lessons. A bondmate was a bondmate whatever you called it. Tak of course knew better.

"Uh, Tak? Are you all right?"

"Why do you ask?"

"You're walking strangely." Lim commented.

"How so?"

"There is this slight swing to your hips when you walk."

Tak pondered this. "I guess I am feeling very female right now." She scratched her belly again.

Lim pulled her aside. "Tak. Did you do what I think you did with your egg sac?"

Tak nodded.

Lim pointed to Tak's belly, which was still being scratched. "What are you doing?"

"It's probably nothing. Just adjusting to the new-" Tak broke off. There was an unusually warm spot under her fingers.

"You're going to the medical bay. You're getting checked out by the bio-technician."

"Lim, it's probably a little infection."

"Get going. If there is something wrong you need to know."

* * *

Tak lay once more on the examination table in the medical bay. The technician was fiddling with his controls nearby. No one else was in the compartment. "Technician Pean? You are going to need something to control your nausea."

"What? Why? You are the one-"

"What you are going to find out will disturb you, and probably cause vomiting. You may even desire to see me executed."

"General Tak- I mean Membrane. I have seen a great number of injuries and poisonings that do truly horrific things. I assure you that- wait. Executed?"

"Technician Pean. I'm a bondmate to a human-" Tak began.

"Yes I'm well aware of that. I'm also aware that it was unintentional. The Tallest recognized Zim's bond-"

"Technician!" she interrupted in turn. She took a deep breath. "I'm a true deviant," Tak admitted quietly. "The worst there is. I ruptured my egg sac on purpose and deliberately mated with my human. His biological material is inside me. My husband and I are mating partners now."

The poor technician nearly had a stroke.

After he had put on the biggest anti-vomiting patch his head would support, the technician activated the controls and watched the results come in through his fingers as his hand was covering his face in a vain attempt to shield his eyes. Scanning arms hovered around Tak.

"Ugh. The… umph… egg sac has been resealed, but the temperature is elevated. There is no organ damage or deterioration by the… hgmp… contamination. The… urp… goo has mostly dissipated and the heat generated by your egg sac is dissolving the rest- Oh. My. Tallest. What are THOSE?"

"What?" Tak cried in concern.

"THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!"

"What? Where?"

"Most are decayed, or failing rapidly, but… but… OH MY EYES!"

"What is it?" Tak yelled at the technician.

"That's not goo!" The technician activated a display so Tak could see. She looked and saw a biological version of a space battle. It looked like swarms of missiles were attacking a superdreadnought at point blank range but were failing miserably.

She had done research, but not down to the _cellular_ level! She looked at the technician with wide eyes. Tak knew what that giant mass on the display was.

Most alien species had genetic goo which an egg cell absorbed if the genes were compatible. That was it. But what kind of physiology developed something like _this_? It was almost _Irken_-like. The tactician in Tak saw the purpose of cellular torpedoes designed to seek out, target, intercept and attempt to penetrate the defenses of cells in order to deliver their genetic payload.

The few little missiles remaining were decaying very rapidly. It was an environment they were not designed to exist in after all.

The technician fiddled with the instruments before him. "Tak. Your body is killing them off. They cannot survive to infect your organs, and I do not believe they will infect your genetic code. Scanning deeper… The egg sac is unaffected except for the temperature, which is disinfecting the area. A few more minutes the foreign bodies will be exterminated."

More scanning. "The egg is still not viab-" the technician stopped in mid-sentence. "The damage to the cellular wall has been healed. I can see the scar. This is not my field, but it seems the egg has repaired itself within the last few hours, and the invader's enzymes are not compatible to cross the barrier." There was a pause as readings were cross-checked. "The temperature anomaly is puzzling. There is no sign of infection, so what is causing your egg sac to- wait a minute. The egg is emitting heat. Much higher than normal Irken cells. The sac is just containing it."

The technician looked up from his displays and at Tak. "The cell should still be inert. This has been activated."

Tak's mind exploded in a thousand different directions at one. _How_? was foremost on her mind, but for a second. The cell had been torn, but was mending rather than dying off. Like a hull breach on a ship, surrounded by missiles seeking to penetrate otherwise impervious defenses. One slipped through the breach before containment could be restored, and the egg responded like it was supposed to by activating it's metabolism and burning up any surrounding goo before too much genetic material could be absorbed.

"Tak," the technician said. "You don't have to worry. The egg won't get very far. The genetic code must be a complete mess. It's not possible to- I mean it will self-destruct before long."

* * *

Dib stepped out of the shower stall. He had managed to doze off some, but it wasn't any real sleep. He grabbed a towel, dried off and slipped on a pair of shorts.

"What?" he asked Mimi, who was watching him.

She glared back at him as if saying 'That is one unimpressive body.'

Dib picked up a shirt to put on when the ship-wide communications kicked on. "Dib! Dib, help me!" It was Tak's voice, flooded with emotions. None of them good. Panic, fear, anxiety, bewilderment, disorientation. Hurt. So much hurt and trepidation. "I need you, Dib. I need you nooooow!"

Dib hurled himself out of his quarters and down the hall in only his shorts, with Mimi zipping from side to side ahead of him.

"Tak, you need to be sedated," came a voice over the communications. Followed by a crash. "Security to the medical bay." Communications cut out.

_Medical. She's in medical._

Fear filled Dib as well. Something was wrong with Tak. _We were reckless,_ he thought._ What were we thinking? We both knew better. We both could have gone into anaphylactic shock right away._ He felt at fault for whatever was now ailing her. He had to get to her.

Irkens scattered before him through the ship's corridors with Mimi streaking along side him. They all had heard that distressed cry from one bondmate calling out to the other. Even if he was human, no Irken was insane enough to remain in _that_ path.

He reached the medical bay to find five Irkens in body armor trying to restrain Tak. Her spider legs were extended and all eight limbs, both natural and cybernetic, were in a freewheel martial dance with her opponents. Dib had seen this state often in Gaz. Tak was in the zone. The bio-technician was out cold on the deck with a sedative patch plastered on his face. One Irken in body armor was thrown across the room, then another. Both jumped back up and into the fray.

"Tak!" Dib yelled into the doorway. He didn't know what was going on, but Tak was in the medical bay for a reason. This needed to stop before either Tak was injured further or killed someone. "Mimi! Secure this room, NOW!"

Mimi dropped her holographic disguise and launched herself into the room. Moments later Irkens in light armor were hurled one after another into the corridor, and Mimi stood in the middle of the room with weapon ports open. Blaster cannon, particle beam emitters, small anti-personnel missiles and even several of what looked like knife versions of a chainsaw. It was enough firepower to punch a hole through the armor plates of _Doomwind's_ outer hull. And they were no where near the outer hull. No one was coming though that door except Dib.

Dib rushed to Tak, who's spider limbs retracted. She sat heavily on the floor. "Tak! What's wrong? Are you hurt?"

Tak just looked at him. She looked lost, now that she was no longer threatened and near her mate.

Beed and Lim arrived outside in the corridor. "What on IRK is going on down here?" he asked.

Dib nodded to Mimi to allow them to enter the compartment. "I don't know. I just got here."

Beed pointed to the Irkens outside wearing body armor. "You! I want this section clear. You got that?" The Irkens acknowledged and trotted off to ward off foot traffic as Lim moved to pull the patch off of the bio-technician and helped to revive him.

"Tak, talk to me." Dib pleaded "You called for me. I came, Tak. Please. Tell me what's wrong!"

"Dib?" Tak asked in a daze. "Our egg. It… it… it was torn. I.. I don't how to handle it."

Dib examined Tak's expression and her eyes. They seemed unfocused and confused. Running on pure instinct.

Apparently Tak had lost the egg. She had told him it had been damaged and would not last long.

"Oh, Tak. I'm so sorry you lost it." She had so much taken from her, and every time she got a little back, something more was taken. "I'll help you through this. You know I will."

The bio-technician groggily sat up. "I just advised the General that it can't survive once it begins dividing and that it should be removed and disposed of as soon as possible," he told Lim.

_Wait. What? Can't survive? Divide?_ Dib thought.

Tak on the other hand had a million things competing in her crowded mind. Half of which she was not able to process. Three things had priority. Her mate, her bond, her doomed egg.

And something Zim had said during one of her communications.

_'They have many different kinds of bonding. Usually only one for mates, but also several for those considered their family unit… __but their strongest is for their offspring.__'_

"… the cell wall mended, but some genetic material must have gone through the breach before it sealed. The egg cell is active," the technician kept saying.

Tak reached out to take Dib's hand, and brought it to her abdomen. He felt that knob under her flesh. There was a warmth there that wasn't there before.

And in that moment, Dib's entire universe shrunk down to three points of light. Himself, Tak, and a little bundle of warmth within her resting under his hand.

Tak was pregnant.

When that little spark of life started to replicate, half of it would need water to live. The other half would need to do without to survive. Two mutually exclusive requirements. And that was just one thing.

It wouldn't survive long.

"Dib?" Tak spoke weakly. Even at her top form, she was never designed to cope with this.

The plea spoke volumes in a single word. She wasn't ready or equipped to deal with this, but losing the egg, this part that was two bondmates combined, could shatter her mind.

"Is there something that can be done?" Dib asked no one in particular.

"We can't save it, if that's what you mean," the technician said. "We don't have the expertise, the equipment or anything. We'd have to go to the smeet factories. And the instant anyone discovered this, you would all be executed. It would be better to remove-"

"MIMI!" Dib commanded. The robot saluted. "If _any_ Irken speaks about removing or _disposing of_" Dib spoke the words with venom "our child, put them in an empty room and weld the door shut!"

The room went silent. The Human had given an order and the SIR unit accepted it. Harming a bondmate and the potential results were almost legendary. But now they were regarding a bondmate with a damaged mate and doomed smeet. The nearby Irkens didn't think the entire universe combined could hold off the retribution if someone tried to harm that doomed egg. Even if he was human, he was a bondmate.

"Lim, order Communications to go silent. I don't want word of this getting off the ship," Beed commanded. Lim turned to an computer terminal to relay the orders.

Tak looked into Dib's eyes. He looked into her's. The rest of them may have come up empty, but he knew one person who had been making unnatural lifeforms for years. Who made laser weasles, napalm squirrels, giant hamsters, mutant rats and hypnotic chickens in vain attempts to conquer his homeworld. And was such a maniac that he wouldn't even think twice about if it was possible. And just happened to be Governor of the world set aside for endangered species.

"Tak, do you want this?"

Tak began to speak. There was hope in Dib's eyes. "Dib, I only have one bond. Humans are different. Your strongest is for your smeets. Don't leave me behind."

It wasn't well spoken, but Dib understood. Tak was afraid. She was bonded and was biologically dependent on him. She was afraid for his bond to her, but also for the egg. Irkens didn't have families. They didn't have offspring. Just one bondmate. Tak was afraid Dib had not finalized his human bond with her, and would be left behind when he bonded with the life within her. She was afraid of being abandoned in favor of his child. And Tak could not survive without her bondmate.

He was in survival mode and reality hadn't really caught up to him yet. He had other priorities. Tak and a new little life. Reality could hit him later.

"Tak, my bond with you can become stronger in this. Our baby is our bond. Nothing will ever change that. Even if we lose the egg, we have this between us. You and I are one now."

Tak nodded. Tears rolled down her cheeks. Some of stress, some of relief, some of things she didn't have names for. Dib's own emotions were in another time zone, but his mind was going into overdrive.

He turned to the bio-technician. "How long do we have?"

"Perhaps two hours until division starts. I don't know."

"Mimi, go to our quarters. Put the bare minimum Tak will need in her ship and whatever you can cram in the back in ten minutes. I'm guessing that will be the PAK maintenance unit."

Dib turned to Beed. "Zim could help us. I need Tak's ship ready to fly right now, and a message sent to Gaz."

"The hypergate is on the inner orbit of Irk's first moon. We're still orbiting the third. It's at least twenty minutes out right now, and we only have approximate coordinates for Earth. And both Zim and Gaz are still in their 'skool.'"

"We need Computer to relay a message anyway," Dib stated. "He can fine tune the coordinates for us."

* * *

Gaz sat in class. The teacher was droning on about something stupid she already knew. Another hour and then she and Zim would have detention for their part in the Cafeteria Incident. Her GameSlave 4 began beeping a certain tone. Whatever it was wasn't good. Computer never interrupted her during skool. She discreetly pulled it out of her backpack and read the message on the screen. Her eyes went wide.

_Urgent- Urgent- Urgent- From _Doomwind:_ Medical Emergency: Critical. Tak pregnant. Egg cell can't survive long once replicating. Tak's ship requests emergency recall via hypergate direct to Zim's base. ETA fifteen minutes from your mark. Will send after-action reports when available._

_ Gaz- I'm the father. Need Zim to save our baby. Don't know if she can take this loss. I'm not ready to lose both a child and a wife. Please. I beg you. Help us. -Dib_

_ [Approve?]_

Dib always annoyed her, and had often gotten himself in trouble in his pursuit of Zim. But this plea. This was different. Gaz mashed down a button and there was a beep.

"Gaz! Pay attention."

"I just realized I have a doctor's appointment." Dib owed her big time. But it was the only excuse that would get both her and Zim out of skool. Unfortunately it would confirm the false rumors about her_ '_condition'. Any other excuse was liable to be debated. "I'm scheduled for a, uh, prenatal checkup. And I forgot it was today. I can't miss it. Unless of course the skool _wants_ me to risk a miscarriage and get sued."

She didn't wait for the teacher's permission. Gaz just ran out of the classroom with all the whispering and down the hall. Fifteen minutes wasn't a lot of time to grab Zim and get to his base. She opened another door and stuck her head inside.

"Zim! I forgot we have a doctor's appointment today. We need to leave right now."

"Wait just a minute, Miss Membrane! Why does Zim have to take you to the doctor? Can't you drive yourself?" Zim's teacher asked the interrupting Gaz.

"That's Mrs. Membrane, and I need Zim to take me because he's the one who put this bundle in me in the first place and he's _going_ to take responsibility. Now MOVE IT, Zim!"

Nobody was going to argue with a hot-tempered Gaz 'mood wing.' It seemed the incorrect rumors about her could be useful. They ran out into the parking lot and got into her Jeep.

Zim looked at her rather confused. "Gaz-blossum, you are sick? Why go to a pathetic human doctor when we have the medical lab at my base?"

She tossed him her GameSlave to read the message. "There is nothing wrong with me, Zim. But Tak and Dib need us at your base."

Zim read the message. "Why should Zim help clean up their stupidity?"

Gaz gunned the Jeep and it roared off of skool campus. "Zim, I know you kept the smeet design you showed me in Computer's databanks. I could have said something to cause you to think that I wanted her growing in the smeet chamber we were given." She pointed to the message. "One misspoken word and that could have been us. That might even be us someday. If we had a smeet in trouble, what would you do?"

Probably something a bit extreme.

* * *

Lim stood next to Beed on the bridge of _Doomwind_. Engines were now powering up to full and the vessel was sliding forward and up above the ecliptic. An announcement was broadcasting. "All personnel prepare for maneuvering. This is not a drill. Secure all stations."

"Beed," Lim whispered. "This is wild and you know it."

"I know," he whispered back. In his previous 'career' as a logistics specialist, aka delivery pilot, his life had been all about getting a package from one place to another in the least amount of time regardless of what may go wrong. Setbacks required shortcuts to be taken. "But you were a logistics specialist too. You know we've all wanted to try something like this. Besides, they don't have time and this is a critical objective. Just get me a new orbital parking slot closer to the hypergate for when this is over."

"Understood. FTL field generators spun up and standing by. Opening launch bay twenty three."

* * *

Tak sat in Dib's lap and both were strapped in as they watched the launch bay doors open to space. Mimi was down at their feet under the control panel of Tak's ship. The Irken went through the steps of powering up the craft while Dib's held her tightly. As if his arms were another set of safety straps.

No, he was clutching _them_ tightly. His five-fingered hand held tightly to the warm spot in her abdomen. As if the egg sac could fall out of her and roll around on the floor. She had recovered enough to be able to function on a sort of autopilot, relying solely on the training and experiences of her previous life before Dirt.

She was practically robotic, like she didn't know how to respond to events. In truth, she didn't. Tak looked over her shoulder at her human mate's eyes. He was in the same state. He looked back.

"Tak, we both know you're the pilot in the family. Not me. Your ship doesn't have a real AI. I can't do this manually. You can. Just focus on the immediate task at hand. Breathe deep, let it out."

If she was more herself, Tak probably would have snarled at Dib for treating her like a fresh trainee. But just as she was focusing her energy into piloting skills to keep from being overwhelmed, he was focused on keeping her that way to hold off the tsunami of reality that would hit him soon enough.

Tak took a deep cleansing breath and let it out, resetting the power grid to pour nearly everything into propulsion, maneuvering control and the inertial dampening field.

* * *

The controller acknowledged the incoming signal. "Hypergate control. Go ahead."

The voice came back. "This is Governor Zim and Lady Gaz's vessel _Doomwind_, Black Sheep Prime."

_Great, another governor's ship making demands,_ the controller thought. _Wait. Did he say Governor_ Zim?_ Black Sheep Prime?_ He felt a chill. Zim, the devastator and one-man plague of any Irken who had the misfortune of being on the same planet with him. And a Prime designation indicated the commander of that particular governor's personal unit. He spoke with his governor's voice if he used that callsign. And anyone who signed on with Zim and his human bondmate had to be unbalanced in his brainmeat.

"Go ahead _Doomwind_." What came next gave him chills.

"We are declaring a medical emergency and are usurping the next slot for a long range subspace jump. One small craft. Clear all traffic in front of the hypergate and approach vector two-one-six at once."

You did not want the concepts 'unbalanced,' 'Governor's Own,' and 'emergency' to ever be anywhere near the opening of any verbal interaction during your work shift. And you _really_ did not want the name _Zim_ mentioned on the same day of such a thing.

_"Doomwind_. Confirm request. Did you say clear _all_ outgoing traffic?"

"Confirm. We are on a least time course and will not be able to stop for any obstacles."

In other words they were going to run over any ship in their way. The supervisor instructed his subcontrollers to redirect traffic. "Understood. Traffic is being cleared. Hypergate is powering up. Tell us your destination so we can look up the coordinates."

"Your coordinates are not accurate enough. The craft will be jumping directly into Earth's atmosphere. Transmitting manual coordinates for you in five seconds."

One of the Irkens below him hissed. "Did he say, into the planet's _atmosphere_? But, but that's _insane_." Usual practice was to sling a vessel to about ten light-minutes from the target destination. Roughly the distance from Earth to it's sun. Two light minutes was considered risky given no one could see what traffic or space junk could be around the planet. But practically onto the planet's _surface?_

The supervising controller directed the incoming navigational coordinates into the hypergate's control computers. "_Doomwind_, coordinates received and loaded. We do not have you within our approach pattern or traffic control scans. What is your location?"

"We have just left orbit of the third moon and will be going into FTL velocity in twelve seconds."

"Are they _mad_?" came a cry.

The control supervisor cringed. A ship was coming at them at _interstellar speed_. Whatever was going on over there screamed something beyond urgent. And fit with what little he knew of a Governor's Own unit dealing with a threat of some kind. For them, the concept 'all options are on the table' meant something different than to most sane people. They took it far more literally.

He looked out of his viewport. There was nothing out there. Then for a fraction of a moment too short to process, a long blur that reached across the starscape and a very large vessel seemed to materialize out of empty space as it momentarily tapped it's FTL field generators for a split second. It's sublight engines were blazing as it moved forward.

"Capital class vessel! Battle cruiser mass!" cried a report. "I thought they said _small craft_!"

"It's off the approach axis!" came another. "It's turning!"

_Doomwind_ banked and turned with all the grace and speed of an office building. But the vessel did it, presenting the ship's broadside to the hypergate at close range. A small craft blasted out of one of the open ports running along the side of the ship like roundshot out of a cannon. The controller watched in a mixture of awe and dismay as the tiny craft hurled toward the aperture of the high tech slingshot awaiting to fling it across subspace to it's destination in the blink of an eye.

"Sir! That ship's power! Sensors, even life support. Everything! Its all channeled into maneuvering and propulsion!"

As the Doomwind curved up and away from the area, the little craft began to rotate. They were going into the hypergate _backward_. Somehow the controller knew. Someone of vital importance was dying on that ship and this was an all-or-nothing effort to save them. He had a suspicion that a bondmate had to be involved.

The little craft's engines flared even more. They were using their main engines in a maximum power braking maneuver as the energy of the hypergate grabbed the ship and it vanished in a blink of light, presumably straight into Earth's atmosphere.

The controller, amazed at what he had just witnessed, wished them well. Whoever they were.

He turned to his staff. "We will not be lodging a complaint over this incident. Return to normal operations."

"Hypergate control. This is _Doomwind_. Medical craft has reached its destination. Returning to parking orbit now."

The control supervisor gazed at the departing form of that capital ship. He almost felt sorry for anyone who had to go up against those people on that outdated and obsolete vessel. They were obviously crazy, but they could pull off things no other Irken would even dream of trying.

* * *

Tak struggled to keep her ship on course as it fell backwards ten miles up above the Earth. Fire and superheated gases swept around the craft, past the clear canopy and trailed behind their path. The engines whined with all the power the ship had. But they were slowing.

She felt the human arms around her as she handled the controls. Holding her tight as G forces built up. This was insane, what they were doing. But a part of her was beginning to understand. Technically speaking Dib didn't have to be here, taking these risks. But he did. He had to be here, with her. With- with her smeet.

There were no words to convey the concepts. A Human's strongest bond was with their offspring, and now she was beginning to understand what that meant. It didn't overshadow Dib's bond to her. It completed it. Expanded it to include someone more important than either bondmate, for that little cell they were putting everything on the line for was both of them combined.

Because of that, if the humans started using their brainmeats and rose to their intelligence potential rather than going about their lives like a bunch of sleepwalkers, this planet would be the most dangerous hornet's nest in the universe if the wrong person poked their nose into it.

Tak's ship continued to fall and slow. The fire and superheated gasses dissipated, and the edges of the ship's hull cooled to below glowing hot. The ship rotated once more a quarter mile above the planet's surface. The roof of Zim's base opened and Tak's ship landed heavily, but adequately, where the Voot Cruiser was normally parked.

As the roof closed overhead, Dib released the straps as Tak opened the canopy. He picked her up and jumped out of the cockpit with Mimi's feline form close behind as Zim and Gaz appeared on the rising lift platform. Neither Dib nor Tak had ever been so glad to see him before. Of course they had never been glad to see Zim before, but still…

* * *

Mimi finished tying Gir to one of the defense gnomes. Both were in disguise out in the front yard. Their owners had wanted them out of the way for a time.

"I wuvs youuu." Gir said, strapped to a gnome.

Mimi's eyes said 'And you are the biggest idiot I have ever had the misfortune of meeting.'

Mimi stood guard to make sure Gir did not escape and cause something to explode, including himself.

Gir hugged Mimi. "Do you want a tuna cupcake?"

_Argh! How did he get loose?_ Gir's head spun around from the slap of her holographic paws.

* * *

"Zim, can you…" a distraught Dib stood by Tak's side as she lay on a table in the medical lab.

She was unconscious with a tiny incision over where her egg sac was located. Small and strange looking probes were lodged inside the cut and guided by Zim's hands. He read results from a nearby display. Gaz stood leaning up against a wall, waiting.

Zim looked at his long time adversary and brother-in-law. "The cell has not yet divided. Zim is using cooling rods to slow down the metabolism. The cell as a whole is fine, but the genetic encoding structure is a mess. This was not supposed to happen naturally."

Dib looked down at Tak and ran a hand along her brow and back to an antenna. "I know. Can you do anything to save it?"

"It will be extensive. The egg must be extracted and nanosurgery performed. The genes will need to be removed and resequenced. Dib-stink. The DNA must be almost completely taken apart and rebuilt. Humans and Irkens are just too different."

"But the one you designed for Gaz-" Dib started.

Zim interrupted. "Is a wholly artificial construct in a computer simulation. It would be engineered much like a piece of equipment from raw materials. Not by a natural process. _This_-" he indicated Tak with his hand "- is utterly different."

Dib sighed in defeat. "I understand."

"But it's not impossible."

The human looked at Zim.

"There are two options. Remove the genetic code and construct a new one based on what it would be if the two halves were compatible. Half Irken, half Human. The other will be to remove the incompatible sections and replace them with donor material from either you or Tak. But the encoding would probably either be almost all Human or Irken. Not equal portions."

"It wouldn't be a clone?" Dib asked.

"No. A piece of it would still be made up of both genetic codes. Just not much of what was originally there for one of you."

Dib knew what his decision would be. "Can you pull this off?"

"With the greatness that is ZIM? Do you really have to ask?"

"Yes. Your plans don't often work out the way you think they will."

Zim glared at the human. "Only because you get in the way. But you will recall that Zim's production of unnatural creatures is very successful."

He had a point.

"Then use Tak a donor to fill in what it needed," Dib told Zim. "And when you are done, put it back in her egg sac." He doubted a mostly human embryo with a need for water could thrive in an Ikren egg sac or smeet chamber. But Irkens needed PAKs to survive.

"Zim, about a PAK-"

The Irken looked at him. "Zim knows. Zim did not wish one for his simulated smeet. But that was designed to function without one. This- this is unknown. Zim will do his best, but her intelligence may be quite limited for an Irken. Maybe even for a human. Time will have to tell."

He stepped away from the table to let Zim get to work. "Zim? It's a girl?"

"It is a cell. But it is encoded to be female."

Dib stepped away and Gaz joined him, guiding her brother back upstairs to the living room. "It will be alright. You'll see," she said.

* * *

The couple sat on Zim's couch. They were holding hands, yet staring blankly ahead. Now that they were no longer in crisis mode, reality was catching up to them. Occasionally one would come up for air long enough to give the other's hand a comforting squeeze. To let the other know they weren't alone in this.

"Dib?" Gaz softly called out from the entry to the kitchen. "Why don't you and Mimi take Tak's ship home? I'll bring her along in my Jeep. She's been through a lot and needs a place to rest."

Dib followed the instructions glassy eyed. Gaz had to remind Tak to activate her disguise before going outside. Before they left, Dib and Tak looked at Zim. "Thank you for saving our baby," Dib told his former enemy. Tak merely nodded her head, any sign of hostility no longer present.

* * *

Tak in her human disguise lay in Dib's bed. Dib sat next to the bed holding her three-fingered hand. "How are you holding up?" he asked.

"I don't know," she said. "Am I really going to have a smeet?" Tak knew the answer, but still needed to ask the question.

"We're having a little girl," Dib said. "We're going to be parents." It hardly seemed real to him either.

"If she isn't intelligent- If there is something wrong with her brainmeat without a PAK-"

"She will still be our girl and she will be amazing," Dib told his shaken Irken wife.

He was shaken too, but humans had been having kids since there had been humans around. Irkens had not. Tak was probably the first in several centuries at least. If this was scary for him, what must it be like for her? She needed his comfort too much for him to get lost in his own thoughts as well.

"Will you still take me on dates?" she asked. "After all this, are we still… mating partners?"

Dib smiled and kissed her hand. The one wearing her ring. "Of course."

There was a knock from the open door. Gaz was standing there with her overnight bag. Dib got up and walked her down the stairs into the living room.

Gaz turned to him. "You know, not long ago you wouldn't have been caught dead doing any of this. Or would be trying to expose them. You would have chosen Earth over everything else. Whatever that means. But now you sleep next to an Irken each night. Accepted her into your life. Take loving care of her. Started a family with an Irken. Even trusted Zim to save your baby for you. Told him to repair her genes; to be mostly Irken because that gave your kid the best chance to be born."

His sister put a hand on his shoulder. "I'm proud of you, Dib. You weren't stupid for once."

"I got her pregnant."

"She's your wife. It happens. But you didn't lose it when you needed to keep your head on straight. Didn't sacrifice your baby's life in an effort to make her mostly human. I'm not sure you could have done that in the past. That's why your not stupid. Just make sure you stay that way."

They regarded each other for a moment. Then backed off because it was too weird.

"Listen, Dib. I'm going to Zim's for the night. You and Tak need alone time together with all of this. You've had your whole lives turned upside down and it will never be the same."

"Thanks. We really need it."

"Listen, Dib. When the baby comes, I think it might be a good time for me to move in with my husband. Your girl could have my room. I guess it depends on how long until the due date."

Dib didn't say anything.

"But I guess that is something to consider in the future."

Gaz turned for the door.

Dib spoke up. "Uh, Gaz? Be careful. You know…"

Gaz looked over her shoulder. Dib wasn't protesting anything. Forbidding anything. He knew that she was married. Was much farther along in building her relationship with Zim than he was with Tak. That she loved that alien and Zim loved her in his own crazy way. That one day she would have a child with Zim and maybe several. Everyone at skool already believed one was on the way. He just was expressing that he didn't want her to have a scare like he just had. Just because Zim and Gaz couldn't conceive naturally didn't mean something couldn't go very wrong.

"I will," she said. "Zim and I, well, we're more closed off than you are. Sort of like a pair of porcupines, I guess. Plus I would have to have the 'birds and the bees' discussion with my Irken husband, and I'm not looking forward to that anytime soon. You know he can be a bit clueless."

She turned once more for the door and paused before turning back around. "Dib? Thanks. For respecting that it's my choice."

* * *

Gaz stood in the medical lab. Zim wandered inside. "Zim has to go to the new base. Two more of your primitive aircraft are available for modification. It disgusts me that this is Tak's plan, yet Zim is the one who has to do the work."

"How is it going?" she asked, not looking at him. Zim had been very busy the past few days.

"Two demonstration examples are complete. The rest are waiting for the main shipments of parts to start arriving. However Zim refuses to fly such primitive contraptions."

Zim walked over and stood next to his human wife. They remained there for a few moments. "Why are we staring at the smeet chamber?" he asked.

"I'm just thinking," she replied. "Tak's situation, the rumors at skool. It just brought some things up, you know."

Zim just nodded. It did indeed.

Gaz opened up some more. "I have to admit that part of me wants to say 'why not.' We're married, have resources to live upon. Everyone at skool only thought I was expecting until today when I used it as an excuse to get us out of skool early."

Even though both knew that the other thought of having offspring in the future, they had never openly talked about it.

"You wish this to happen also?" Zim asked. It was a tricky subject. Caution was warranted to not provoke Gaz.

"I do," Gaz told her Irken husband. "But not right now. I have the rest of this year and another after that before I'm out of skool. Plus we have all these other things going on and almost two hundred Irkens to get settled soon. When we do this, I want to be smart about it."

She paused to ponder for a moment. "But I see all these projects and demands on our lives and where would we fit a smeet in at all? I don't want that to happen either."

Gaz sighed. Zim took a hand. "Gaz-blossom. You are divided?"

"Yeah," she said with another sigh. "It's part of being human."

They didn't say anything for awhile. Just stood there.

"Zim?"

"Yes, Gaz-blossom?"

"When we do, have kids I mean, I don't want to use the smeet chamber."

"That will mean risks, discomfort and-"

Gaz interrupted. "I know what it would mean. It's what I want."

She paused again to think some more. "Zim?"

"Yes?" he asked.

"I want you to use my eggs. And my DNA inside them. I don't want our smeets to be completely built by Computer. I know they have to be engineered, but I would like them to be as natural as they can be. Half you, half me."

"That will be more difficult, but is no challenge for ZIM!" He raised his arms in the air, but only half-heartedly, as if in jest. He smiled. She smiled back.

"Can one still be her?" Gaz asked. She was referring to the half Irken girl stored as a genetic simulation in Computer's memory.

Zim nodded.

"I'm glad. I want her to be my firstborn."

The couple stood there for several more minutes. Not so much looking at the smeet chamber, but just being together.


	22. Chapter 21

A/N: Again thanks to my reviewers. alexrushing5, Zerg170, Guest, cold blue, ZimStarwarsRules, Kazehana23, memmek10k, Canadafangirl11, and tamashi-aoitsuki who has volunteered to translate this story into Spanish. And of course CoffeeWench. Wow, such complements! And last but not least SpookyZalost.

I know I've taken too long to post a new chapter. I hate it as much as you do. But with my fatigue levels, sometimes it takes a few weeks to get my brain into a functioning gear. If I'm delayed, it's because I'm really that exhausted, and am probably trying to keep up with the dishes and laundry. You know how real life has a way of messing with what you want to accomplish.

Guest: Hey again! I hear what you say about Skoodge. It was just one of those random ideas that I had not really put much thought into. But I can still see him as 'Governor' with all the work (such as parking Taller's spacecraft for them) of a governor but with the title, glory and rewards going to the figurehead the Tallest put in his place as an acceptable poster boy for Impending Doom 2. You know Skooge always gets the short end of the stick, so I can see this as plausible. Thanks for enjoying the Dib/Tak thing in the last chapter. I wasn't originally going to write much on Dib or Tak in the story (to be honest, when I started I never imagined this story would be more than 20,000 words), but sometimes you get a thought in your head and it won't let you go. Same thing with the last chapter. I too realized that Dib is a guy and being close to her, not to mention all the bathing, would effect him (It's been a long time since I was a teenager). I didn't see Tak getting knocked up until about a third of the way though and struggling to create some content in the chapter. Then there was figuring out how it could happen. As for the confusion bit, I will explain at the end of this Author's Note. I went ahead and sent a friend request in Facebook. Don't really know how use it (had technophobic parents so my internet experience is limited) but I figure I'll learn eventually. Read the rest of your cut-off review, and have to say you seem very insightful. Would like to bring in Skooge and Tenn. Those are good ideas. Unfortunately I am struggling with the number of characters in the story already, and suffer from chronic exhaustion due to one of my disabilities. It will be all I can do to finish this story. Just the last chapter was about 50 hours of effort (mostly staring at a monitor trying to get brain to put ideas into words). But I do like your ideas. Actually I like a lot of your ideas. Will see what I can work in, especially Mimi being a comfort device for Tak. But perhaps you should think about writing those yourself in greater detail. Let me know what you decide as I am going to open this up to one-shots and mini-episodes if other writers wish to do so, once the story is finished.

coldblue: Thanks for your comments and suggestions, and your willingness to be helpful. For a description of the smeet Zim designed for him and Gaz, there is a brief one in "Chapter 14." Dib and Tak's would be mostly Irken, but with hair. It is heartening to see a reader that is chomping at the bit for a new chapter. If I could post faster I would, but the best I can do is the best I can do, ya know?

Note: I have not done a lot of proofreading yet, so please bear with any mistakes. I will have to fine tune it later.

* * *

IRKEN BIOLOGY: I know this bit could have been a bit confusing on some of the implications involved. This was sort of deliberate as I was writing based on the perspectives of characters with little or incomplete knowledge available. They were dealing with a lot of unknowns at the time. Especially the bio-technician. His view was to maintain the status quo, to keep Tak as a 'proper' Irken without irregularities. Much like Air Force pilots are required to keep in what seems like perfect health or be grounded.

That said, here is how it goes. The egg sac, much like the Sqeedily Spooch, serves as several human organs in one. Ovary, uterus, cervix, ect. It contains a single egg cell attached to the very top of the organ's inner wall. The Egg Sac is indeed fragile to a certain extent, and designed to rupture and leak enzymes. Rather than just flood Tak with hormones, like a Human, it triggers a temporary form of 'puberty.' That is the closest human word I know to classify the process. Let's just say that her belly-button is not a belly-button and set a few inches lower than a human's. It is incredibly small and normally sealed tight to prevent infection of her inner organs. This is an important feature for combat troops who have a very dirty job which exposes them to all sorts of dangerous elements. Not to mention what she dealt with on Dirt. However, when the Egg Sac is ruptured, it dilates to allow an Irken to be receptive to her mate, and allow access to the egg itself through the small tear of the sac lining. Once fertilized, the Egg Sac would expand as the embryo develops and eventually the rupture section of the Egg Sac would serve a third purpose. To expel the fetus when the time came.

There is a difference between a designed rupture and traumatic rupture. A severe impact to the Egg Sac could cause it to rip completely open, tear from it's connective tissues, or simply crush the organ; resulting in significant internal bleeding, excruciating pain, possible overdose of enzymes, exposure of the inner body tissues to outside contaminants with resulting infections, and so on. Surgery would be required to repair the trauma. This is a major weakness you would not want in a frontline soldier and explains the bio-technical's concern, even if he did not know all the details. It also shows what Tak was willing to give up for her mate.

As all Irken females have their Egg Sacs removed upon graduating from smeethood, it explains why the Irkens as a whole know little or nothing about these things. Unknown is the fact that a female's antennae also emit a very weak pheromone during egg sac rupture, requiring physical contact with a male's antennae to trigger a similar process with his physiology. This goes further into explaining why Tak is so into running her antennae through Dib's hair. It also shows why Zim nor any other Irken is not acting like a typical hormonal human male (It's Caveman! The superhero women love to hate!). Aside from the fact that he is an alien, not a Human in Irken skin. Normal Human rules do not apply in these relationships.

Does that mean Zim and Gaz are stuck as she does not have antennae or pheromones? No. Am I going to go into that now? A definite no. Unlike Tak, Zim is not in his third stage of bonding yet. But you know someday he will.

* * *

Gaz tossed and turned in the darkness. Not that she was exactly uncomfortable. It was all just different. There was too much space, and the sheets and mattress were brand new. Nothing had been broken in yet. Then there was whenever she would stretch out her feet Gaz would stub her toes on the solid form of Gir sleeping at the foot of the bed. Then the robot would start snoring. Well, if you could call repeating 'snore' rather loudly snoring.

She sighed and finally gave up. "Computer, lights. Dim, please."

"Yes, Mistress," Computer replied. The lamps sitting on the two end tables at each side of the bed within Zim's new bedroom at his base came on. But not bright enough to hurt her eyes.

Gaz looked around. She had never looked in here before she had tried to get some sleep. The decor was mostly reds and blacks. A set of dressers at the foot of the bed offset the end tables on either side of the headboard. The picture of the supernova remnant hung over the subdued headboard also. A wardrobe leaned against the far wall.

She got up without waking Gir. Having the robot squeal in joy that he was awake again was not something she wanted to subject herself to this late at night. Gaz walked in her pajamas through a door and into the adjoining bathroom. The human turned the knobs on the human sink and splashed water on her face. She grabbed a nearby red washcloth and dabbed her cheeks and chin.

The girl looked up. "Computer. Tomorrow have a mirror installed over this sink." Computer had done an adequate job on Zim's new bedroom, but naturally a computer would not understand the need to check one's appearance.

Gaz reentered Zim's bedroom. _No_, she thought. _Someday this will be our bedroom. Pretty soon I'm going to be living here._ She looked at the other door leading into another adjacent room. Gaz hadn't mentioned another space when she ordered Computer to set up a living space for Zim. But with the day's events still fresh in her memory and the knowledge that she had a niece on the way, Gaz knew what that neighboring room would eventually be and what Computer had in mind when he had installed this base expansion. The nursery for her own future child.

Which also reminded her that she knew Dib and Tak's child was _not_ the result of a pressing a wrong button on a smeet chamber. Which led to thoughts that once she moved in this would be her and Zim's bedroom, and that one day she and Zim would follow in their footsteps. Something that she was not ready to face yet. Gaz loved Zim, true, and was his wife. But crossing that line with another species wasn't something for her to face lightly. She hadn't been open to the paranormal like Dib had been for years and years. Or open to being close to _any_ person in general either for that matter.

It was no wonder she couldn't get any sleep. There was too much going on in her mind. _May as well take a bit of a walk_. "Computer, where is Zim?" she asked quietly, so as not to wake up Gir.

"Mistress, Master is in the computer lab."

Gaz walked barefoot out of the bedroom door and into the corridor. Thoughts about one day living here collided with more comfortable thoughts on Zim's terrible, half-formed ideas of what an Earth home should look like up on the surface level. _I mean _Computer _has a better grasp on interior design than Zim does_, Gaz thought to herself. She always thought it was awful and stupid up there. But it was Zim's, not hers; and over the years she had just gotten accustomed to what Zim's base looked like during her occasional forays to drag Dib out of whatever trouble he had landed in while trying to infiltrate Zim's base. Plus she had spent a great deal of time here ever since they partnered up for the CWZ competition.

Not that she cared all that much about such things. Her own room back at the Membrane residence wasn't much better, truth be told. Sort of like some dark dungeon with free game posters hung up on the walls around the occasional medieval mace. The underground sections of Zim's base she could live with. But up above? When she moved in, there were going to be some changes. _And the first thing that is going to go is that toilet next to the refrigerator along with those stupid 'I Eat Food' posters_.

She walked into the computer lab. Zim was seated in front of the large displays, combing through what appeared to be a large amount of data. She looked at him, wondering if this was what it was like being married to a workaholic. Then Gaz saw the look on Zim's face when he turned his head to see who had entered the lab. It wasn't even close to the look of focused-on-work like her Dad always had. Zim was instantly focused on her, although his expression was a bit queasy.

_No,_ Gaz thought. _The late nights may end up being similar, but it's because Zim doesn't need to sleep every day. Not because his work is more important. He just needs things to do while I sleep like a human does._

"Can't sleep, Gaz-blossom?" Zim asked.

"No. My brain won't stop thinking," she replied. "What are you up to? I though you would be at the new base."

"The aircraft conversions can wait. Zim is looking up Irken medical references. The best thing that Zim can say about that bio-technician is that he is incompetent. He will not come near the _niece_ of the mighty ZIM!"

Gaz stood behind the chair Zim was sitting in and put her arms up on the backrest. She rested her chin on her knuckles as she looked over Zim's head at his displays. "Sooo you're going to be Tak's O.B.?"

"BEE?" Zim screeched, spinning his head around. "My Irken technology!" He pulled a flyswatter out of his PAK and turned it on. It began to hum with a green glow of a standby repulsion field around the swatting end. "Where is it?" he shrilled, looking around.

Gaz rolled her eyes, but there was a slight smile on her face. His moments of such idiocy was having a certain appeal at times. As least when it was silly instead of just stupid. Like right now, it was almost cute in a demented sort of way. The girl knew her heart was doomed to being in love with Zim when something so absurd as a turbocharged flyswatter could light up her world.

"No, Zim," Gaz said as she stretched her arms around the chair and mildly hugged the Irken from behind. "Not a bee. An O.B., short for an obstetrician."

"An Obstacletrician?" Zim mispronounced, looking puzzled at Gaz;s reflection in his display. "There is a plot of Tak's that Zim must foil?"

That earned a rap on the head between Zim's antennae with Gaz's knuckles. The difference between silly idiocy and stupid idiocy was in the eye of the beholder, and Gaz was the beholder that mattered. Not rap of doom, but lightly. A warning that Gaz was on the edge of annoyance.

"Hey!"

Zim turned his head and scowled at his Gaz, who leaned over and planted a quick peck of the lips on top of Zim's head. The various expressions on Zim's face was priceless. It was as if his brain didn't know whether to be pleased or vexed and couldn't do both at the same time.

"Not obstacle. Obstetrician. A smeet doctor," Gaz explained.

"Ah, yes. ZIM will be the GREATEST smeet doctor of ALL TIME!"

Of course Gaz wasn't about to let that one go. _Somebody_ had to keep Zim's ego in check. "Because you are the only smeet doctor around."

Zim fixed her with a definite look now. Gaz returned her arms back around the chair to embrace Zim. "You know I have to keep you grounded before that ego of yours gets the better of you."

"Zim knows no such thing," the green alien muttered as he resumed his view of the displays before him.

Gaz had to smile. "Yes, you do. You just can't admit it."

The girl squeezed her arms a little tighter and leaned forward over the backrest further so she could also rest her chin between Zim's antennae. She was up on the tips of her toes, and it was an awkward position to reach over the backrest. Zim's antennae curled inward to rest in her purple hair, and the alien let out a contented and blissful sigh.

"You saved their baby, Zim. No one else could or would even try to save a child out of that genetic mess. Yes, you are way more intelligent than what I gave you credit for in the past-" Gaz let out a sigh of her own as she took pleasure in Zim's antennae running through her hair. "-but that doesn't mean you don't have gaps. You know you do. But just like you can have your Irken love for me despite being human, I can love you despite you're occasional… miscalculations."

The antennae in her hair stopped moving, and Gaz tilted her head and kissed Zim's scalp to ease the sting of her truthfulness. "Like when you thought I was talking about a bee a just now. In the past I would have felt contempt at what I saw as just stupidity. But now? Now that sort of mix-up brightens my day because I'm finding it endearing. It makes me smile. Makes me grow closer to you."

Zim tilted his head up to look into her human amber eyes. Gaz looked back warmly. "It's a human thing. It means I'm falling in love with you, Zim. More so each and every day."

The Irken smiled and his antennae resumed running through his bondmate's hair. He knew this was a momentous thing for Gaz to say. "You are more relaxed now. Will you be able to get back to sleep?"

Gaz pulled back, not because she wanted to, but because of the uncomfortable position. She shook her head. "There are too many reminders. Its like everywhere I look I see things that remind me that you and I will one day have a smeet. Being away from home so Dib and Tak can have a night to come to terms with suddenly expecting a child. Even here in your base are reminders of what our future holds. You researching for Tak's pregnancy, being in your bedroom and knowing someday I will be living here with you. Husband and wife together." Zim wouldn't really know what that meant yet.

She let out a deep sigh and took one of Zim's hands. "We've made a decision. But I feel like its hanging over my head, waiting. It wouldn't be so tough, but it's not a theoretical idea of 'someday we will have a smeet.' Zim, we made a tangible _plan_ for me to be implanted with her embryo in a few years. _We even know what our daughter will look like_. She's real to me. Not an abstract idea like it would be for most couples. If I close my eyes I could see her. Its more like 'someday I will actually hold her in my arms.' I can see it already. It's not a dream or an imagination, but a future reality."

Zim looked at her and placed his other hand over hers as well. "You wish to reconsider?" He was eyeing her questioningly.

"No. I can't. I can't pull the plug on her."

"Then you wish to proceed."

"No, Zim. We aren't ready yet." Gaz saw the confused look on Zim's face. "Zim, you haven't completed your bonding process with me, and its necessary. Tak was, and they were still reckless. We can't be reckless, Zim. We're not in their position. Dib is human and can help her through it all regardless where his bonding with Tak is right now. I saw that just researching for our niece was making you queasy. This would be radically more involved, because I'm the one that's human. Your Irken brain hasn't adapted yet.

"Could you handle my vomiting when I started going through morning sickness? Help me into the bathroom so I could pee, let alone help clean up if I didn't make it in time? I might not be able to bend over to do that, Zim. I might not even be able to see my own feet past my belly, let alone put on my own shoes. I'd be dependent on you just to move around. Just to get up out of bed or a chair. And then I'd need you to help me pass our smeet out of my _body_,with all sorts of fluids and stuff. Your Irken nerves would be screaming the whole way. Not drawing us closer together."

Zim looked like she was describing the innermost circle of Irken hell. "Gaz! How could you want- How could anyone- Without a smeet factory?" Zim stammered. "It's sounds barbaric!"

"It's rough," Gaz admitted. "But it wouldn't happen all at once. It's a gradual progression as the smeet grows. But it's what my body is designed to do." She looked at Zim. "But there are good things about all of it too. That would outweigh the bad. And in the end its all worth it. But you can't understand these things until your Irken nerves go into your final stage of bonding. They won't let you."

She was glad Zim hadn't asked exactly _how_ Tak and Dib (or humans in general) had started a smeet. Zim looked rather pale with just this. That was definitely a subject for another time.

"How do you know all of this?" Zim asked.

"I had to hear about it standing in line at the supermarket," Gaz answered. "And in health class they taught us how our own organs work. But I admit I don't really know much. Not about what I would go through in real life anyway."

"Why did Zim not take this 'health' class?" Zim protested.

"You did. Dib said you were passed out the whole time. He hacked the school computer so you wouldn't take the class again without him being there to make sure you didn't weaponize something."

Silence echoed through the room. Gaz reclaimed Zim's hand. He had let go at some point. "Zim, even from what little I have heard there is no joy like bonding with the little life growing inside you. Without that- Zim, I don't want to turn out like my mom. What she did to me. How she left me."

That part was something Zim understood about Gaz very much indeed.

"You won't, Gaz-blossom. You could never do that. But Zim does not know what you need to do right now."

"I guess I'm just feeling like I'm standing under the shadow of all this," Gaz replied. "It's keeping me awake."

"Then you must step out from under it," Zim commented simply.

Gaz regarded her Irken husband. He might not know what he was really talking about, not having a human thought process. But he was right, and there was only one direction in which to take a step.

"Zim, I need to do something rather than just wait. Otherwise I'll just keep thinking about it. Can you take me to the medical chamber? I want Computer to remove one of my eggs and place it in stasis."

* * *

Zim and Gaz weren't the only ones having trouble sleeping that night. Dib was wide awake too, lying next to Tak who was curled up next to him. She was out cold, plugged into the PAK maintenance unit. His room was a mess, having to rearrange half his room to fit in the maintenance unit next to the bed where Tak could access it without sleeping on the floor. Fortunately Mimi had been there to help haul the heavy thing. But Dib wasn't in a mind to tidy things up afterward.

Tak was still in her holographic disguise, and Mimi was curled up at her feet in her feline form. Tak's side rose and fell with her breathing underneath Dib's arm. He lay on his own side facing her, looking at her.

Not just at Tak. But at his Irken wife, Tak. The mother of his unborn child, Tak.

The paranormal side of him wanted to, but he just couldn't. He couldn't bear to see his mate, let alone his unborn daughter as alien. They were precious. The most precious people on the planet, and a tear rolled down his cheek as he held on tighter to the two lives he now loved more than any other. It may not be fully entrenched in the romantic in form yet; such things took time for those roots to burrow down deep. But a love for an unborn baby girl and her mother were a powerful thing.

_I never thought this would ever happen to me_, Dib thought as he put a hand over that hard knob within Tak's abdomen. He caught himself and laughed a little on the inside. _Well, now that I think about it, who _else_ would this happen to? Knocking up a girl from another planet_?

The heat emanating from the egg sac had dissipated quickly after the surgeries, one on Tak and the other on the egg cell. He knew this would happen, but still he worried. Not that Zim had sabotaged anything. There was no need, for the egg would have aborted on its own without intervention. But what if Zim made a mistake somewhere? But then surgery on a DNA strand was mostly up to Irken technology. And even Dib had to admit that Zim had a knack for biological manipulation. His creatures had chased him often enough to know.

Yes, he had worries. Lots of them. But they all were covering over the one big thing he was trying to come to terms with. That one Dib Membrane was going to be a _daddy_. And never in his most far fetched, crazy dreams could he have imagined that his child would be Irken.

Dib raised his head as he heard the front door open and close. That couldn't be Gaz. He got up out of bed and entered the hallway. The light downstairs snapped on, and the figure in the living room was walking into the kitchen. Dib stepped down the stairs, no longer alarmed.

"Dad?" he asked. "What are you doing home?"

Professor Membrane turned to face Dib. "Oh, hello son. The cleaning lady finally threw us out for a hour. Doesn't she know that she's interrupting SCIENCE! But it does give me a chance to use these new hyper-nap blindfolds. It will allow me to get a month's worth of sleep in twenty minutes!"

The Professor proudly held up a pair of glowing eye patches. Strangely they seemed to be glowing the color black. It did not seem a healthy thing to place on one's face to Dib.

"That's great Dad. Listen, I need to talk to you about something."

"Yes, yes. More of your insane mumbo jumbo, I suppose," the Professor said as he removed a loaf of bread from the refrigerator.

"No, Dad," Dib said. "I got in some trouble."

"Yes. The school notified me of your suspension. Daughter sure is a handful, isn't she? But you know better than to provoke her. There was always something not quite right about her temper matrix."

"Dad. Please listen to me for once. I got a girl in trouble."

"Did you accuse the Henderson girl of being Bigfoot again?" Professor Membrane asked. "You should know better by now than to make such insane accusations just because she has long hair."

"No, Dad."

"Little Debbie next door of being a weresheep? She was only going to a skool play, Son."

"Nooooo."

"Julie-Anne Stormon of being a paste monster? You realize she had an accident helping her uncle wallpaper their bathroom."

"Dad!" Dib cried. "I- I got a girl pregnant!"

Professor Membrane didn't move.

Dib went on. "Dad, she's upstairs sleeping. Its been a real strain on her, and she's not been well. She doesn't have any family except us, Dad. We almost lost the baby a few hours ago. She needed surgery." Dib sat down heavily on the sofa in the living room. "We're trying to not freak out about this. She needs me, Dad. They both do."

"Now son, I know you're insane and given to all sorts of crazy stories-"

"What is WRONG with you!" Dib yelled as quietly as he could. "I'm not even telling you about the paranormal here! I'm talking about a girl- oh why do I even bother?"

Dib grabbed his father's sleeve, dragged him up to his room and pointed inside toward the sleeping girl in a light purple nightie under a mound of blankets.

"Son?" the Professor asked. "Who is she?"

"Her name is Tak. She's a refugee. I first met her in elementary skool, but she got sent back home. Her people treated her badly, and she suffered for a long time."

Mimi opened her eyes and gave the humans a hostile glare. Dib went over and sat next to Tak on the bed. "Mimi, stay. It will be alright." Honestly Dib didn't know that yet. "This is my dad. Just like I'm the baby's dad. He won't be staying long."

Mimi gave the Professor her best 'I'm watching you' scowl.

Dib looked from Tak back to his father. He felt exposed. _Was this kind of what Zim felt like every day I was after him_? he asked himself. _Is this what Gaz felt like when Dad came home and found Zim in the bathroom_? The Professor just looked back.

"I can't let anything happen to them, Dad," Dib stated with a trembling voice. "Tak has… she's been through too much already. She was broken when I found her, Dad. I couldn't stand by and do nothing. But then we became a pair. Now we have a baby on the way. Tak's not ready for this. I'm not ready either; to be father, Dad. But they need me."

"Son," Professor Membrane said walking up behind him, "let me tell you a secret. No expectant father is ever really ready. Not until the moment they welcome their child into the world and he knows he must change the world for that tiny hand wrapped around his finger."

Dib looked up at his father standing there, and knew he was speaking from personal experience. It also explained why he was never around. Ironically, it seemed the reason the Professor had no time for his children was because he was too busy changing the world for his children. Not that the thought helped much.

"Thanks Dad," Dib said as he took his sleeping mate's hand. He didn't say anything for several seconds. "I'd rather this be under better conditions. You know, with her conscious. But you'll be back at the lab soon." Dib sighed. "Dad, I'd like you to meet my family. This is my wife Tak. And that's her cat Mimi." Dib gently touched a spot on Tak's abdomen through the blankets. "And this in here is your granddaughter."

Mimi just kept her red eyes on Professor Membrane, ready to defend her Mistress.

The Professor eyed the sleeping form in Dib's bed. "She's a fine looking girl. Uh, Son. Why is she plugged into that machine?"

Alarm bells started going off in Dib's head. Not that his father would ever believe the truth. "Dad. That thing on her back is what keeps Tak alive. It needs maintenance at night. I told you she suffered quite a bit. And she has to wear a disguise to keep her safe. If the wrong people discovered where she is…" Dib left the rest unfinished.

"Surely she is far enough away that she is safe. Just one face among millions. She doesn't need to put on a disguise when she goes outside."

"No Dad," Dib said not knowing how to steer the conversation. Then an idea popped into his mind. Use the Professor's own ideas of why an obvious Irken form wasn't an alien. "This isn't what she really looks like. She's using a hologram right now. Tak was in a teleporter accident. You know. Like Zim? You remember Gaz's husband. He was here the last time you came home."

"A holographic disguise?" his father said. Obviously he would address a scientific achievement first.

"Yes, Dad. Tak made it herself. She's very intelligent. But we can't risk her being seen in her real form. Not even in our own house." Dib put a hand on his forehead.

"Son-"

Dib interrupted the Professor. "And what am I going to do when the baby is born? Someone could take her, Dad. My wife too. Just because they don't look like humans do." Saying that tasted dirty to Dib because not too long ago he would have been counted as one of those people who would do such a thing. It made him realize how unbalanced he had once been.

"Slow down, Son. You're getting way ahead of yourself. Not that I can't blame you. But those things can be solved another day, by SCIENCE! So what _does_ my daughter-in-law look like?" Professor Membrane asked.

"She had a similar profile as Zim does," Dib started. "But she was on a starvation diet for a long time. Her ribs show a great deal and she is too thin for her good." Dib stopped himself. He was doing it again, treating Tak like a patient. "She has green skin, and three fingers per hand," he said as he brushed his hand over a holographic brow and down her cheek. "She's about a foot shorter than I am, and has these antennae that have this bent curl to them, and these amazing purple eyes. They can be scary at times, but when we're alone and Tak looks at me- Well, its hard to describe."

Dib looked down at his Irken wife wearing the human hologram. His mind's eye showed him the Irken form underneath. He saw her as she really was, except for that invisible aura that newly expectant fathers could see surrounding their pregnant mates. "She's beautiful, Dad. And our daughter is going to look a lot like her I think. Tomorrow I want to take Tak out and register our marriage. We were going to wait, but with the baby on the way I don't want to anymore."

"You do understand that just because she looks different, that doesn't mean she's an alien?" the Professor asked.

Dib could finally give his father a truthful answer and be not be seen as crazy. "I know, Dad. When I look at Tak, I honestly don't see an alien."

Instead he saw his wife and an expectant mother. Irken? Yes. But Dib had been around an Irken or two for years. Not to mention his pregnant mate was Irken. Scary at times? Yes. But Dib had lived with his scary sister for most of his life, even if those scary edges had been rounded out recently. But alien? No. Not any more. And definitely never his own daughter.

"Then there is hope for your sanity yet," Professor Membrane declared. "When you take her out I will have my workmen deal with the windows. A family should be able to let down their guard at home. I will write her a note, but I need to get back to the lab soon! SCIENCE awaits!"

* * *

Tak opened her eyes as the cables retracted into the PAK maintenance unit. Snuggling into her was her human mate. Dib was fast asleep, and seemed to be clutching a piece of primitive paper in his hand, which rested on her chest. She took it from his hand. It had unfamiliar writing on one side.

_To my newest daughter Tak. Dib introduced me to you while you were asleep. I am a very busy man, so I regret not being able to meet you like a daughter should be met. I am understanding that you have had some difficulties, and that you must wear a disguise. I am familiar with your basic appearance from other teleported DNA accidents_. ('Huh?' asked Tak.) _ My son-in-law is also one such as yourself. Fortunately my son is able to recognize that you are not an alien. How preposterous such an idea is._

_ When my son takes you out tomorrow, my workmen will come and install holographic windowpanes in all the windows. Not only are they bulletproof and blast resistant from the outside, but they will display any home scene that my family wishes to program for outsiders to see. You and my grandchild may be yourselves at home, Daughter, without anyone the wiser. Dib said you had suffered a poor diet at the hands of others. On the kitchen counter I have left a loaf of my latest version of super-toast. It is a marketing failure as it causes significant weight gain, but it will help you recover from your ordeal. Take half a slice twice a day until no longer necessary._

_ I must go now. I cannot delay any longer for SCIENCE can't be kept waiting! Welcome to the family, Daughter. And welcome home._

Tak's eyes watered until she couldn't see any longer. The first time she had been to Earth, this letter would have been a deadly insult or an opportunity to exploit in order to pursue the takeover of Zim's mission. But now it was something very different indeed.

Mimi walked up and settled next to Tak's side. Tak reached down and began to stroke the holographic fur. She was still troubled. Disconcerted about the little life growing inside her. Of one day passing a living being out of her own body. She reached down and touched that spot in her abdomen. Tak was anxious about becoming a mother to a smeet. Afraid that the little life within her might be growing wrong, or not growing at all.

Yet she also felt safe. Safe next to her Dib. Her human mate who significantly demonstrated that he could take care of her and their smeet. He had known what to do, who to go to for help regardless of how insane it seemed. Dib had _known_ without doubt, and had acted when others had told her to give up the life within her as a lost cause. Tak even felt safe knowing Zim and his human bondmate were nearby, who had saved her doomed smeet.

_No,_ Tak thought to herself as she glanced at her mate sleeping so close to her. _Our smeet. Our precious little smeet_.

Tak consciously realized she _wanted_ this for the first time since she learned of her pregnancy, as tears flowed down her face. There was something _right_ about a little piece of her mate Dib growing within her. Even if her Irken senses told her it was barbaric and a disgrace to her kind. _Well _screw _Irken_, she thought as she tilted her head next to Dib's, running her antennae out of the confines of the hologram and into his hair as she took hold of one of his five fingered hands. She placed his human hand over her abdomen and held it there tightly.

The disguised Irken paused stroking Mimi long enough to pick up the letter once again. She couldn't see through the tears to read it, but she remembered the last line.

_ Welcome to the family, Daughter. And welcome home._

She was reclining with her mate in a genuine nesting place that was_ theirs_. Not some temporary compartment on some ship. This was their home, on her new homeworld. She had not been just accepted, but _adopted_ as if an offspring herself into this human family.

Tak dropped the paper and resumed her stroking of Mimi's holographic fur, which seemed to further soothe her nervousness. "Mimi, we're home. We're finally home."

* * *

Gaz unlocked the front door and led Zim inside the Membrane home. Well, perhaps more on the order of stumbling inside with Zim following. It was too early in the morning again, but a house call was necessary before they continued on to skool.

"Diiib," Gaz croaked loudly. "I brought Zim by to check on the baby before we went to skool."

The human girl plopped down on the couch and pulled out her GameSlave IV. Zim stood near the door waiting in his human disguise. While he had been here with Gaz on their movie nights, they had the house to themselves at the time. But Dib was back, and now this was Tak's lair as well. This seemed to call for what Gaz had called "best behavior." It was still not clear what that meant as Zim always gave his best. Well, as least when it was deserved.

Tak's voice called down quietly from upstairs. "Just a moment. I need to change." Then they heard Tak's voice again. "Mimi, stay in our room until called for."

She appeared at the top of the stairs a moment later wearing one of Dib's plain white undershirts and a pair of black pajama bottoms. She was still in her holographic disguise. Tak eyed Gaz sitting on the couch playing her GameSlave, and motioned Zim into the bathroom. Dib was still asleep in their room, and something about Gaz was saying '_Do Not Disturb_.' Besides, Tak felt a bit vulnerable at the moment, as if a part of her was holding her breath.

Tak sat up on one side of the long bathroom counter next to the human sink and rolled her eyes, resigning herself to the need to be examined by Zim. "Are you sure you know what you're doing?" she asked the other Irken.

Zim pulled a sophisticated scanner out of his PAK. "After Zim resequenced your smeet's genetic code you still have doubts?" Zim noted Tak's hand moving to her abdomen. "Fine. Zim spent all his time after the surgery researching Irken smeet development. While there is nothing for-" he gestured to Tak "-this, there is enough public data on general smeet specifications. Now I need to scan your egg sac. Now place this over it." Zim handed her a detachment from the scanner he was holding.

Tak lifted up a corner of her shirt and slid the scanner's reading head over the necessary location. "What happens in the smeet factories and what is happening to me are nothing alike."

Zim showed his annoyance as the instrument gathered data. It was no where near as powerful as what what available in his base, and was much slower. "Zim knows this, Tak. Zim may have a defective PAK, but that does not mean Zim is an imbecile!"

Tak held up a hand. It surprised her. She had no wish to fight, demean, or put down Zim for the sake of the past.

The device in Zim's hand beeped. He looked down at the readouts. "The egg cell has successfully divided, and it is maintaining its metabolism. All functions appear stable, as was expected."

Tak didn't say anything for a moment. "My smeet is going to be all right?" She caught Zim's arrogant scowl. "Zim, I'm the first Irken to bear a smeet. I will become the only mother within our species, and my smeet is part human. My health is still in recovery as well."

Zim took a seat on the counter on the opposite side of the bathroom sink. "Zim comprehends some. Zim will continue to act as your smeet doctor and monitor regularly."

"Zim, what do you care? _Why_ do you care all of a sudden?" she asked.

"Gaz-blosson reminded Zim that we could have been in trouble like you and the Dib-stin-, I mean Dib. We have plans for a smeet of our own. If something were to go wrong… Well, Zim does not like to think of such things but he is not stupid."

Zim watched his feet dangle over the bathroom floor. "Besides, Dib explained families to Zim. Your smeet and Zim's future smeet share a bloodline. They are connected. Will be connected. Whatever. He said that even though we dislike each other, if something happened to Zim and Gaz-blossom that you and Dib would accept our smeet as your own. And if something happened to you and Dib, your smeet would be as if our smeet."

Tak didn't know what to make of this. "Sort of like possible hostages? Is that why you care, because I could end up with-"

"No!" Zim scolded. He pulled his Pad out of his PAK and showed Tak an image. A semi-Irken child that looked a lot like Gaz. The skin had a faint touch of green, but with red human eyes that were set between diminutive ears and a nose. Two Irken antennae sprouted out of purple locks of hair. "Not them as possible hostages. Us as possible replacement parents. This family thing is a difficult concept for the Irken mind. But we are not on Irk."

It was true that family was difficult for an Irken mind to wrap itself around. Tak recently had her own experiences to relate to, and soldiers knew all about replacing losses to fill the ranks. But Zim was talking about _adoption_. And not a formal and meaningless one, but a real one; for their smeets would share a blood connection through their human roots.

Tak looked at the smeet design pictured on Zim's Pad. "Zim? She looks human. But you despise the humans."

Zim tucked the Pad back into his PAK, looking almost thoughtful. "True. But Zim loves a human too. Zim designed our smeet only to confort Gaz-blossom and to show that such things were not impossible. But Zim now realizes that Zim wanted our smeet to reflect much of his bondmate," The Irken let out a sigh, looking in a particular direction as if he could see through the wall and down at his human wife. "Zim is in love with Gaz-blossom."

This admission startled Tak. "Zim? We're Irken. We don't love, we bond."

"Zim had more than bonded, but Zim is not foolish to think that it is the same as the humans. We do not have a vocabulary for these other things, so Zim must borrow terms."

Neither Irken said anything for awhile. "What stage are you in now, Zim?" Tak asked.

"The end of the second stage," Zim replied. "It may take awhile yet, but something significant could trigger the completion. Why do you not display your contempt for Zim?" he asked, changing the subject.

Tak thought about this for a minute. "I hated you for ruining my life. You were a defect and yet everything seemed to go your way whereas I was at the top of my class and thrown away. You devastated Irk and Devastis-" Tak stopped herself. "Because you were right. If things had been different, I would not have bonded with my mate. I.. I would not have had the things that are important to me now," she said holding her abdomen and thinking of when she and Dib had conceived. "Most of all because only you decided to save my smeet when no one else would have even tried." Tears welled up in Tak's eyes, for her smeet was fine and growing.

Tak kept going. "I can't even hold you being defective against you. Not after I realized I am one too, and a major deviant as well. And you know what, Zim? I _like_ being a deviant. I _want_ part of Dib growing within me. But it's unnerving too."

"Zim's Gaz-blossom has said she wishes to carry our smeet as well."

Tak paused to look at the other Irken. "Zim? You and I are the only Irkens who have bonded with humans. More than bonded. Zim, there are things I need answers to. I don't want to do something that would hurt the smeet. You may need answers as well."

"What are you talking about?" Zim asked. "Zim does not have much time left before we must leave for skool."

"I need to know how much work I can do still. I know I can't take chances now. And how much time I have."

Zim sighed. He had just wanted to take a scan. That's all. Not all this talking stuff. But unfortunately this was a legitimate concern. "You are still mobile as long as you are careful not to fall from stairs or from other heights. Or taking significant blows to your lower sections. The smeet is still just a few cells and is resilient. That will change in time. Unlike the full Irken development cycle of five years in a smeet chamber, simulated projections indicate about twenty months for gestation. Then development will continue after you pass the smeet. You will be occupied afterward for a long time, Tak."

That was actually a relief to Tak. She had time to adjust to her new life. "Can I still open my egg sac?" Tak asked hesitantly.

Zim looked at her confused. Tak elaborated. "If I clench my muscles I can open a small rupture in my egg sac. Can I still do that or will it hurt my smeet?"

The confused look grew. More elaboration was necessary. "It's so my abdomen will dilate again."

"Well," Zim let the word hang for a bit. "Technically speaking, as long as everything around you is sterile and you are careful not to exert excessive pressure. That will no doubt change later on. But that seems a rather stupid thing to do for no reason."

Tak looked away with a smile and a far away look in her eye. "Oh, it's not stupid, and it has a definite reason. I know human females don't have the same workings, but Gaz would understand. I mean, how else do you think Dib fertilized my egg? It's not like humans have smeet factories."

"What exactly does Gaz-blossom understand?" Zim asked, feeling a bit queasy.

Tak was brought back to the present by the question, and her cheeks flushed. "How is it that you have been here all these years studying the humans, married a human, even _love_ a human and not know how they reproduce?" Truth was Tak had a pretty good idea why. Well, on top of all the Irken ones. First up was that sort of thing _wasn't_ Irken anymore. Probably hadn't been for centuries at least.

"Zim was interested in making less humans, not how to make more of them!" He retorted. He quieted down. "There is something Zim is missing, isn't there?"

Tak nodded. This wasn't like them, but they were the only Irkens facing human relationships. There _were_ no other Irkens in this arena. There was no research to study. No experts to fall back on for strategy. "I'm now realizing I'm missing something also. Dib talked about that it's important to be in love, too."

"It's a human thing," Zim said. "But we've bonded with humans. They connect emotionally. We bond with mostly instinct and altered brainmeat. But Zim finds he now has some emotions connected to Gaz-blossom. My wife calls it Irken love."

"Last part of stage two?" Tak asked.

Zim nodded. "The consequence of being bonded with an amazing human." But Zim said this with a feint smile.

Tak saw this. She knew that smile herself. "Just wait until you get to the final stage, Zim. There is nothing like mating with your human."

She knew she had said that out loud only after she said it. Tak looked over at Zim. His eyes were large and looking straight at her. "I didn't mean to say that. I know I'm a disgrace at best. Defective. Deviant. Every other name they can call me." Tak let out a sigh. "Zim, once I saw they cut out my egg sacs it triggered my bonded instincts. I can only see my egg sac as belonging to Dib."

Zim seemed to be trying to form words.

"Dib's my husband, Zim. Just as Gaz is your wife. More than just bondmates. We both married humans. We both are going to have smeets with them. We've crossed so many lines already."

Tak just looked down at her holographic feet and took a deep breath. "Zim, it wasn't easy for Dib and I. We both had some issues. You and Gaz might already be facing the same ones. I don't know. But Dib and I reached a point where this was what we both wanted. I shouldn't have said anything."

Zim finally spoke in a weak voice. "How? You're Irken."

"I had my egg sac put back in. Without the enzymes it releases I couldn't be receptive to my Dib."

"That is why you were asking about opening your egg sac?" Zim asked in near revulsion.

"Yes," Tak answered with a fond far away smile. "I _liked_ it when Dib and I were together. When we conceived our smeet. I want to mate with my human again."

* * *

Gaz looked up from her GameSlave as Zim came running down the stairs. "MY BRAINMEAT!" he was screaming and holding his head in both arms. "BLEACH! MUST. BLEACH. BRAINMEAT!"

The human girl got up and moved to restrain Zim as Tak appeared at the top of the stairs. "You _told_ him?" she asked Tak harshly.

Dib appeared by Tak's side, rubbing sleep from his eyes. "What's going on?" he asked as he watched Gaz pulling Zim away from the entry to the kitchen where the cleaning supplies were kept.

"Tak!" Gaz yelled. "This is your fault. Do something!"

Tak walked down with Dib following. She grabbed one of Zim's arms and flipped him on his back. She kneeled down and began to speak. "Zim. Listen to me. I know where you are right now. Before I bonded I would be reacting the same way. But Zim, being a mate is a very good thing. You'll see when you reach your final stage of bonding. It can bring you closer than you can believe possible."

"It's not possible!" Zim screeched in blind hysteria. "Zim has no mating appendage like Dib-stink. THERE IS NOTHING BETWEEN ZIM'S LEGS!"

Tak reached past Gaz and belted Zim in the gut. Not enough to actually do damage. Just enough to hurt and get the attention of Zim's brain.

"Agh!" Zim cried as he curled onto his side, holding his belly.

Gaz was stunned. She continued to kneel by Zim, but now was offering comfort as she glared at the other female. "What the _hell_ was that?"

Tak looked back at her briefly, and then at Zim. "Zim, where are you hurting?"

Zim glared back at Tak in a lot of pain. "Where do you think? You hit me in the sqeedily spooch!"

"Zim, listen to me very carefully. I had to eat meat for over six years. I know about internal pain, and let me tell you that our squeedily spooches don't have pain receptors down there."

"Of course it does!" Zim growled back at her. "It hurts!"

"Tak, you had better-" Gaz started to threaten.

"Zim, that is not your squeedily spooch," Tak informed him. "My egg sacs were in similar locations."

She turned to look at Gaz, and saw death incarnate dancing in her eyes. Then Tak realized what she had done.

Gaz's voice echoed a thousand past doomings. "General Tak Membrane. Do. Not. Move."

Tak stood up at straight as she could. She was actually afraid, because it wasn't Gaz kneeling by Zim anymore. It was Lady Gaz Membrane of the Irken Empire.

"General, I deployed my people to get you off of Dirt. Sheltered you aboard my ship under the Ikren's noses. Shipped you clothing and other supplies. Okayed your emergency recall back to Earth. Reasoned with Zim to save your child. Stayed with you and Dib until you had healed enough, then drove you to my home. Stayed away so you and your husband could have time alone to adjust to your new situation. Then I come back with Zim first thing in the morning to check on your baby rather than just heading straight for skool.

"In turn," Gaz continued as she helped Zim over to the couch, "on the first day on Earth you strike your rightful Governor, my bondmate, and interfere with my _bond_ with Zim. Did you really think it was your _place_ to tell Zim of all people about what Dib did with you? What exactly did you _think_ would happen? Perhaps lifting you off of Dirt was a mistake. Now tell me, General. What exactly can I do to you?"

Tak was fearful now. Striking a governor was very bad. Interfering with other's bond was _really_ bad. She of all people should know that, as jealous as she could be. But _striking_ a bondmate? She answered truthfully, eyes straight ahead in duty-mode. "Anything you wish, Lady Gaz."

"No limitations? No restrictions?"

"None," came the answer. Her life was forfeit, and a tear crept down Tak's cheek.

"Gaz, you can't seriously-" Dib tried to step in.

Gaz interrupted him. "I don't want to be late for skool. Dib, help Zim outside and into my Jeep. I want to speak to Tak in private so she can explain herself without you butting in."

Dib grabbed one of Zim's arms, and helped the moaning Irken out the door. Gaz turned her attention back to Tak.

"Lady Gaz. Zim and I are the only Irkens bonded with humans. He is in a stage of bonding that I skipped, and I am in one he will soon be entering. Zim told me he is at the end of his second stage, and that he is in love with you. I don't have that, having skipped straight to the final stage of bonding, and this 'love' is important to Dib. I am the only Irken that has mated, and with a human too. Zim will enter his final stage and will face this as well. I know what that was like when I discovered what being a mate involved. Zim was figuring it out.

"I was remembering my time with Dib, before it all turned to a blur of terror. I let some things slip that I should not have. You saw what happened, but you don't recognize what was happening. I saw it on _Doomwind_ when the female contingent discovered they had been harvested and had smeets made in the smeet factories. They started to lose their sense of identity just learning that they had offspring. The others were struggling with knowing they have offspring. Irkens do not reproduce. Irkens do not have offspring. They do not mate. It has become part of what it means to _be_ Irken, Lady Gaz.

"Zim just had that slapped in his face. We are both defects. Both deviants in different ways. He is bonded to a human, like me. He is one day going to have a smeet with a human, like me, but hasn't actually faced that yet. But he is about to enter his final stage of bonding as I am now. And he now knows that I mated with Dib, and that is how we are having a smeet. "

Gaz studied Tak coldly. "So Zim was having one of his freak-outs."

"More than that. Our perception of what it means to be Irken is crumbling. And hasn't Zim has always been proud of being Irken?"

"Fine. Did you have to hit Zim? Or was that because you still hold a grudge against him?"

Tak spoke carefully. "Zim's brainmeat was stuck in a loop, and needed a distraction to give him a chance to reorganize and to have something tangible to help him not deny his own anatomy. I hold nothing against Zim. I can't anymore."

Gaz came over and looked down at Tak right in her holographic eyes. While Gaz wasn't what you would call tall for a human, but she still had an eight inch advantage over Tak. "And why is that? He destroyed your life."

"Because he did I have everything I value most in this new life. I have a mate with Dib. I was able to retrieve my egg sac that was taken from me, and we are having a smeet together. I had a second chance as a General. I have a new homeworld after being nothing but rejected from my native one. And last night your father adopted me into your family as if I were another daughter. He said that he will make it safe for me and my daughter to look like ourselves inside our new home. Zim saved my smeet's _life_, and is continuing his role as a medical specialist. Zim even said that you and him would adopt our smeet as your own if something happened to Dib and I, just as we would apparently adopt yours. As much as I may not like it, I _owe _Zim everything. I- I just needed to know if opening my egg sac again so I could mate with Dib would hurt my smeet. But things got out of hand. Now its all forfeit because I didn't see Governor Zim and Lady Gaz. I just saw Zim."

Dib stuck his head in the front door. He had been just outside listening, unsure if he should intervene or not. "Zim is in your Jeep waiting."

He paused and licked his lips in nervousness. Dib had seen Angry Gaz many times. Vengeful Gaz, Indignant Gaz, Gaz the Keeper of Grudges, the Embodiment of Wrath and so on. But never had he seen his sister in her Lady Gaz persona before. Dib had seen how this persona had an effect on the Irken smallests onboard _Doomwind_, but he hadn't ever though about how it might have effected Gaz. And part of that persona was as the Official Right Hand of Judgement where Irkens were concerned. Strange and dangerous as it seemed Gaz right now represented Irken Law, and Tak knew it.

Dib spoke up in Tak's defense. "Gaz, we're all neck deep in unfamiliar territory here. She doesn't know about social, work and family boundaries like we do. Tak didn't mean anything by it." He wanted to stand up to Gaz for Tak's sake, but Lady Gaz was addressing her General who had screwed up. "We're all trying to adjust to all of this, Gaz. We're family, but have official roles to play with each other too. Irkens don't have multiple roles in their lives."

The fire in those amber human eyes died down, and there once more stood Gaz Membrane. From the look on Tak's face Gaz saw that she had brought out the 'presence of doom' too forcefully. Belting a governor on Earth was a serious thing, and belting her Zim was worse. But Tak wasn't from Earth. When Tak had said that there were no limits on what punishment could be given out, she had spoken from an Irken perspective that included banishment, torture, and execution. Tak had already suffered or faced all of those in some form or another when she was dumped on Dirt and left to die after a slow, withering existence.

"Then she needs to learn fast," Gaz stated flatly. "Zim and I don't want nor need to hear about your love life. If anyone is going to educate Zim it's going to be me, his wife." She poked a finger into Tak's chest. "And _you_. Don't ever lay a finger on Zim again. And I mean _ever_. I don't care what reason you think have, or what provocation Zim gives you. Don't even _think_ about it. If anyone is going to pound on Zim, its going to be _me_."

"Yes, Lady Gaz," Tak said in a monotone.

"Now, do I want to know about _how_ you got your egg sac back?" Gaz asked. "Somehow I don't think you just asked for it and they meekly handed it over."

"We stole it back," Tak answered.

"_We_?" Gaz asked. "And stole from where exactly?"

"The other female Irkens from your ship, and from a high security genetic repository on Irk."

Gaz had to take a step back. "Please tell me nobody was actually shooting during this incident."

"Well, their security teams believed we were there to assist them after the initial missile spread, and there were locks and other security measures that needed to be overcome. Then that needed to be covered up by-"

The Irken was stopped by a groan from Gaz. "Cowboys. I've got a bunch of wild cowboys running around out there."

Dib moved closer to where Gaz and Tak stood in the living room. "Gaz, I don't think the situation is that bad-"

"Are you kidding me?" Gaz nearly shouted. "Did your brain take a _vacation_, Dib? Your wife just told me that her and my people out there just committed an act of _war_ against the Irken Empire of all people! Right on their damn homeworld! You mean to tell me that all these years of your obsessive compulsive need to prevent an Irken invasion of Earth you actually missed that?"

Gaz took a moment to collect herself. "Tak, tell me this. Will they discover what you have done?"

"No. They believed we were assisting them in keeping the facility secure as we retrieved a rouge SIR unit."

Gaz looked at her wristwatch. She was almost late for skool and Zim was waiting in the Jeep outside. "I don't have time for this right now. I want a full report logged with Computer by lunchtime. That includes ones from Beed and Lim as well. I also want the new base ready to go by tomorrow night. That means security, residential, medical, and storage areas, the fabrication and assembly bay, ordinance production, hangers, and drydock all operational and ready to receive _Doomwind_. Then I want the full complement of your strike fighters upgraded and ready to transfer to _Doomwind_ in one week and the Spittle Runners transferred to the base then they touchdown. I also want plans for constructing heavy ground units and on upgrading _Doomwind's_ defenses."

The first half of the list was mostly either instructing Computer how to reconfigure spaces or move machinery within the new base, or grunt work running tests and personally checking to make sure all was up to specifications. The second half was all grunt work or tasks with an unrealistic deadline to keep Tak busy and not causing problems. Tak still looked on edge and unsure of what would come next. Dib on the other hand was looking a bit manic like in the old days.

Gaz looked back at Tak. "You can have Computer and Mimi help out, but Dib will be busy getting airframes lined up with his Swollen Eyeballs until his suspension is up on Friday. Once _Doomwind_ arrives, I will allow one of the cargo shuttles to act as on retainer for their use with one of our pilots and three others for security. But I want no more surprises. No more problems. Understood?"

Tak nodded. Even her PAK was recognizing Lady Gaz as a rightful Taller.

Dib spoke up. "Gaz, I was going to take Tak and get married today. You know. Officially." He was looking rather worried. No doubt visions of Irken ships coming down like rain was filling his mind.

"Then you two can do that over lunch, but I'm afraid you two are going to have a very busy honeymoon," Gaz said with an evil smirk. She finally took a breath and let it out. "Now speaking as your smeet's Aunt, don't hurt yourself. You need to let yourself recover and heal too. I've never had a sister before, and I'd rather she not get broken in the first week."

Gaz let out a huff and walked out the door.

"Tak?" Dib asked.

The Irken let out the tension she was holding, turned and moved to put her arms around her mate. "Lady Gaz was decreeing my punishment. There is no real threat to your planet. But I did not realize what I was doing, Dib. She could have just as easily sent me away back to Dirt. I could have lost everything."

Dib wrapped his own arms around his wife and ran a hand through her blue holographic hair. "It's all right. You know things got out of control yesterday. That was just Gaz laying down the law. But at the end she took off her commander's hat and spoke to you as family. Gaz called you her sister. I think she's looking forward to becoming an Aunt."

* * *

Gaz was sitting down on the floor in front of her locker, pushing buttons on her GameSlave. Class would start in another ten minutes, but Zim was out of sight.

Zita stopped nearby and opened her locker to retrieve her books. She hesitated before looking down at Gaz. "Hi Gaz. Where is Zim? We don't often see you two apart these days."

Gaz didn't look away from her GameSlave, yet the screen was still in its start screen. It looked like Gaz was just pushing random buttons while her mind was elsewhere. "Zim needed some space this morning."

Zita accepted this non-explanation. "I hear congratulations are in order. I guess the rumors turned out to be true after all."

Gaz pulled her head up and looked at Zita with a glare but some confusion as well.

Zita explained herself quickly. "You had a doctor's appointment yesterday. You know, for your baby?"

Gaz took in a long breath and let it out slowly, but not in anger. It sounded to Zita more like resignation. "Zita, I just had an emergency to deal with and needed an excuse to leave without questions."

"Oh," was all Zita said. She didn't know what else to say. But there still seemed something that was off about Gaz, so she sat down next to the purple haired girl. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Hell YES!" Gaz let out as if she had been holding everything inside for a decade. "My stupid brother is the reason for all the speculation about me, and he turns around and gets a girl in trouble."

"Dib?" Zita asked incredulously. "Dib and a girl? You mean a real girl? Not like some zombie sort-of girl or some girl he built in his garage?"

Gaz had to chuckle at that. "Yeah, she moved in to my house last night." Then she sobered at the memory of her brother's face as he carried Tak down to Zim's lab in mortal terror. "Her name is Tak. You might remember her from elementary skool? Anyway, when they came in yesterday she was in critical condition. Emergency surgery and everything. Almost lost the baby. It was really close. They're getting married at lunch."

Zita's eyes were wide, but not really looking at anything in particular. "Wow," she said. "That sack of crap! He wrecks your reputation, and then turns around and does it for real? Gosh." Zita shook her head. "How are you doing? I know that this rumor must feel like a lot of pressure on you and Zim right now-"

Gaz interrupted the girl sitting next to her simply by turning her head and looking at her. Gaz's eyes weren't watering or any such thing. But they looked that she was holding back a lot of something. As if Gaz's eyes could leak something other than tears they would be.

"Gaz? What is it?"

"The rumors are nothing, but I'm really feeling pressure right now."

"Pressure? From what?" Zita asked.

"I'm married, and it's coming with a lot of responsibilities. And more keep piling up. Right now I don't have time for much of my old life. I mean I don't mind so much, but right now I'm feeling a lot of responsibilities hanging on me," Gaz answered.

"Well I know married life has a lot of responsibilities we don't really appreciate until we're either older or hitched."

"It's not that. Its all the other things that came with it."

Zita just looked at Gaz with confusion. Gaz rolled her own eyes. "If it was just marrying Zim, it would be fine. But I didn't. I mean I didn't just marry Zim. I married into a position too."

"I don't understand," Zita responded. "No offense, but Zim's a nobody."

_How do I explain this_? Gaz thought. She let her shoulders slump. _Fill in some details with believable fictions to translate the truth. _"You know Zim's a foreign exchange student. Back home he's considered- Well imagine that the President of a militant country has a guy that is so inept that his efforts routinely and single-handedly obstructs every thing that country tries to do. So the President sends him off to be Governor of a state that doesn't exist. That's Zim."

"That's messed up. But Zim?"

"Yeah. But what you all see is him trying to not draw attention to himself," Gaz tried to explain. She saw the look on Zita's face. "Hey, I said _trying_. But after I married Zim, I got dragged into it. But there are rules about what a Governor can have, power, all sorts of stuff. This fake thing is starting to turn into a real thing."

"I don't get it," Zita said. The bell rang, and the hallways, which had been slowly been clearing of students, emptied. Zita grabbed Gaz's arm when she tried to get up, and she ignored the glare of doom. "You need to talk to somebody. We can just tell them I'm helping you with morning sickness. They won't question it."

Gaz hung her head down and sighed. "Fine, but you don't breathe a word of any of this. Understood?"

Zita nodded. Gaz's expression prophesied doom if her confidence was broken. It was about as surprising as legal wavers for catapult rides into a brick wall.

"Zim named an aircraft carrier after me," Gaz started off. "I'm a doomer, and my online name is _The Wind_. Thus the _CVE-1 Doomwind_."

"Wow!" Zita exclaimed. To many people having a ship named after their significant other was a romantic gesture. Perhaps even if it was a warship. Zita wouldn't have imagined Zim capable of such a thing. She watched Gaz's faint smile. "That is so- Wait. You mean Zim, _our_ Zim, is _connected_?"

"A little. Then there is my own private security," Gaz went on. "They should be arriving Friday morning. And I have no idea what I am going to do with them. I mean it will take them a week to unload and stuff, but I have to assign them jobs to perform."

"You? Security?" Zita asked in disbelief. What amazed her more was that it was clear Gaz wan't joking. "You mean like four bodyguards with handguns? That kind of security?"

"No," Gaz said seriously. "More like a hundred and thirty Marines with an interceptor squadron and air cavalry transport with enough equipment for a small amphibious landing. Plus about sixty or seventy refugees that signed on. Family they managed to slip away from their homeland."

"Damn," Zita said. "No wonder-"

"And then there is my new sister-in-law. Another exile from Zim's home. She was sent away and left to rot and die seven years ago. Dib found out and left to get her. She's been traumatized, and it looks like she might be a bit of a loose cannon. I mean she and some of my people received some disturbing news and got in a freaking _firefight_ somehow. I'm getting the reports at lunch."

Zita just gaped at her. _A firefight? As in actual shooting? And Dib's girl is in that?_

"And then when we checked in on her and Dib this morning, Tak said some things to Zim," Gaz went on to relate. "He had one of his freak-outs you know, and so Tak hit him. I almost lost it. I mean she hit my_ husband_. I went into full doom mode, you know. Lay down the law sort of thing."

Something in Gaz's face kept Zita quiet.

"I saw the look in Tak's eyes, Zita," Gaz said quietly, her gaze far away. "She was looking at death in the face. And I don't mean my usual promise of doom. She struck a Governor and a Co-Governor's husband. I could do what ever I wanted as her punishment. I had the legal authority to have my pregnant sister-in-law put in front of a firing squad and shot, but what's worse it that_ she knew it_."

Zita just looked at Gaz. She saw her pull something out of her pocket and looked at it. It was a picture of some sort. Gaz was staring at it. "I caused Tak's life to flash before her eyes because I was in the middle of a mood-swing. It didn't occur to me what was happening until afterward."

"Gaz?" Zita asked timidly. "Who are you?"

She didn't say anything for awhile. "My full title is Lady Gaz Membrane of the Irkenstan Empire."

The crazy level of security forces, the authority to be literally judge, jury and executioner, and several other things added up in Zita's mind to one thing. Well, two things. But everyone knew Gaz was no liar. More like brutally honest. "You mean like _royalty_? You? Gaz Membrane the Dark Fury is a freaking prin-"

Zita was muted by a fist clutching her lips. "Don't even _think_ of calling me a princess."

Zita nodded as best she could with lips that were held in Gaz's iron grip. They were released, but Zita's eyes were still wide. "But you are like royalty. Right?"

Gaz sighed. Zita was not the type of person to let that concept go easily. "Sort of, I guess. I mean if I wanted to Zim and I could start our own country." She wasn't about to tell Zita that, technically speaking, she was ruler of the planet. Starting a country on it would not be a problem. "I've got the impression from my people that if I wanted to, I could have a few thousand eventually. But I just want to live my life, build up and enjoy my relationship with Zim."

Gaz smiled at the thought.

"But I can deal with all that. It can be tough, but I can. I'm not alone in it. I've got Zim. Plus Dib and Tak are willing to help too." Gaz abruptly changed the subject "But these rumors about me having Zim's kid? You know what's really funny? Zim and I can't even conceive without the assistance of a lab. Then Dib and Tak showing up and expecting a baby? That's what I keep thinking about the most. Me having a little one."

Zita put a hand on Gaz's arm. "I'm sorry to hear that," she told the girl next to her. A couple learning they couldn't conceive could be devastating news, but a couple so young so as to still be in hi-skool? "Who's the picture of?" Zita inquired.

Gaz tried to hide the picture, as if she hadn't realized she had pulled it out where others could see. But then she seemed to decide it was too late, and held the picture in her fist with her thumb covering the top of the person's head.

"This is a genetic construct I guess. The girl Zim and I are going to have someday. I couldn't stop thinking about it. Kept me up last night. I still think about it. This girl is real to me. Real to Zim too. You know I'm actually a little jealous of Dib because I have to wait. Zita, I'm really tempted. Really, really tempted. And this mood swing isn't helping."

Zita was a bit confused. The picture clearly had both Zim and Gaz's features, even though most of the purple hair was being covered up by Gaz's thumb. Also this was the second time Gaz mentioned having a real mood swing. But not only did Gaz keep saying that she wasn't expecting, she just said that Zim and Gaz _couldn't_. "You're tempted, Gaz?"

Gaz shyly pulled up a corner of her shirt. There was a clear puncture mark on one side of her lower abdomen, and surrounded by some minor bruising and covered in a small spot of some sort of sealant.

Zita stared at the spot. "What happened?"

"I had one of my eggs removed and put in storage." Gaz pulled her shirt back down. "Had some synthetic hormones pumped into me last night so I would ovulate. It's why I'm having this… thing I'm having. It's having some weird side effects. Plus being jabbed with a large bore needle-probe does not motivate one to stand up and move around."

Zita gave her a look of concern. "Gaz? What are you even doing here? You should be in bed!"

Gaz let out a slight laugh. "Zita, I can make one phone call and be implanted in a hour. And to be honest, the only reason I haven't is because I know Zim and I aren't ready yet. He's almost there, but not quite. I'd need him to help me a lot, and he just couldn't handle it right now. But if I'm just laying there all day thinking about this girl," Gaz gestured to the picture in her hand, "I think I would end up doing something stupid."

Zita gave Gaz a worried look.

"Zita, I can deal with all of these things. I know I can. But I just don't have _time_. I haven't had time for really dealing with all of these responsibilities the way they I should. I need more time for my relationship with Zim. To be a married couple. I haven't had time to relax with my games for hours on end like I should. Zita, I don't have time for _skool_."

"Gaz, are you thinking of dropping out?" Zita couldn't blame Gaz if she was.

The other girl shook her head. "No. But something has to give."

"Maybe you could try to graduate early," Zita suggested. Gaz looked at her. "Oh come on, Gaz. You never hear of someone who graduated at 14? You're the smartest girl in skool. I bet you could get straight A's if you put down that GameSlave for just ten minutes each class. You never applied yourself. Well, not until lately. Don't you think you could pass any test they required of you?"

Gaz wasn't sure. It was true that she had never really applied herself in her studies. She had always just done what was needed. Not to excel. "I signed up for home ec and some economic class next semester. I never took those before."

"Yeah. Big deal. You can sign up for high school classes at the community college. All on your time frame. Just take one class a day or something when you feel you need one until you get everything settled down."

Gaz let out a long breath. Perhaps one she had been holding in for a long time. "Zita, can you do me one more favor? Could you help me up?"

* * *

The door closed behind Zim as he walked Gaz down the hall. She had shown up at his class saying that she needed his help. Then she had conquered the teacher's protests with "Because if anyone other than my husband sees me start to cry over spilt yogurt, I'm not leaving any witnesses."

"Zim, how are you doing?" Gaz asked. "You had a rough morning."

"Zim's insides are no longer in pain," he muttered.

"You haven't held my hand yet," Gaz commented. Honestly she didn't blame him.

The disguised Irken didn't say anything. "Is Zim failing his Gaz-blossom?" he finally asked.

"No, Zim. Your not if you don't withdraw from me. Just remember we're not them and you haven't finished your bonding cycle. We're not there yet."

"But we will one day. Won't we?" Zim asked.

Gaz stopped in the hallway. "Zim, please hold me." The disguised alien hesitantly drew the human girl into an embrace. "Zim? Do you love me?" She whispered.

"Yes, Zim loves his Gaz-blossom very much. You know he would collapse into a rotting ruin of putrid flesh and misery without you."

Gaz actually smiled. Zim sure had his own way of expressing warm fuzzy feelings. "I love you too, Zim. And I don't want to be without you either. It would shatter my heart." That thought actually brought a tear to her eye, and she kissed Zim on the lips. Softly. It lasted not long, but as if in slow motion.

She pulled away, took his hand and continued down the hall. "Was that bad to you, Zim? Disgusting?"

"No. Zim enjoys your fondness of Zim."

"Now remember us even just one year ago. You would have been bleaching your face and I would have been pummeling whoever it was that suggested we would ever be snuggling, holding hands, and kissing. And neither of us would have shown any mercy if someone had suggested we'd _enjoy_ these affections we show for each other. Right?"

Zim nodded.

"That's how it will be for us, Zim. Okay? But not today and not tomorrow. Focus on us as we are today. Forget Dib and Tak. They were stupid. We aren't."

They finally reached the front office, and Gaz paused outside the door. "Zim, I want to see about taking a test for an early graduation program. I need more time for us, to handle all my responsibilities and problems that come up. I can't squeeze in everything, Zim."

"Zim will also do this. Skool was just a ploy to search out your planet's secrets, then just became a routine. It is not needed for Zim anymore. The only thing here for Zim is his Gaz-blossom."

Gaz nodded and stepped inside the office. She had doubts Zim could pass some spur-of-the-moment testing that was supposed to examine an entire hi-skool's curriculum. But he only had the remainder of this skool year until he graduated anyway. It wouldn't make that much difference.

The girl stood up to the front counter until one of the staff noticed her scowls and stepped over to her. "Yes?" the office drone asked.

Gaz spoke before Zim could open his mouth and insult someone or something. "We're here about the early graduation examination."

Sudden silence swept through the office area. All eyes were on the pair of students. The door behind them snapped shut. "They have spoken the holy words!" The office staff whispered in reverence. The lights dimmed and chanting began as Zim and Gaz were led into an office door marked 'Councilor.' The office was dark, despite the lighting and they couldn't see anything past the wide desk.

A man's voice thundered down at them. "So, you think you have what it takes to escape, I mean, graduate with the limited time, inattention, and sloppy homework you two have turned in?"

Zim countered. "Do you think you could block the MIGHTY Zim if he turned his cerebral bore onto your misshapen skull-" Zim let out a grunt as Gaz elbowed him in the ribs. "I mean, why yes. Yes we do."

"Uh, why is it so dark in here?" Gaz asked, hoping to distract from Zim's indiscretion. He still had difficulty with skool authority.

"Budget cuts," came the thundering reply. "Anyway, the test may take all day and all night. You may miss all your classes for some time. You will receive failing marks during your absence. How will this effect your grades for the semester and your chances for graduation?"

Gaz answered the voice. "We will pass the test and graduate, so we won't need to attend any more classes anyway. We won't need to turn in more papers or tests. We won't need to finish the semester and we won't get graded on anything. Your question is irrelevant."

The voice behind the desk remained silent for a full minute.

"Congratulations!" the voice thundered again. "You have passed the test."

"What?" Zim asked in disbelief. "That's it? What kind of test it that for the likes of ZIM?"

"Budget cuts," said the voice. "it's the most comprehensive one we can afford these days. Here are your diplomas."

Two diplomas with their names scrolled on them were passed over on a dark platter. "Um," Gaz said. "These are printed on cocktail napkins."

"Budget cuts."

"And they are printed with what appears to be crayon," Gaz also observed.

"Budget cuts. Now that you are no longer enrolled in our learning establishment, please empty your lockers and return your books to the front office," the booming voice ordered. "And remember when your kids come to this skool, and they will, vote for higher taxes and increased funding."

* * *

"Zim thinks they have been waiting to be rid of us for some time," Zim said as they left the office once more after depositing their skoolbooks. Their lockers had been mostly empty of anything important, and were quickly emptied into the trash.

Gaz eyed the Conga Line dancing in the front office with the chanting "Two down! One to go!" and a game of "Pin the diploma on Dib" going on in the background.

"Your're probably right, Zim. And I can tell you right now that we are hiring private tutors for our kids, because that was just pathetic."

Gaz slipped her arm around Zim's and held his hand as they walked out toward her Jeep. "Well, Zim. It looks like we will be able to make it to Dib's wedding after all."

* * *

There were many rumors going around skool at lunch. That Gaz had killed her brother and was on the run; Dib hadn't been accusing anyone of anything for nearly a week, so he must be deceased. That some curse had been lifted and so now Gaz had slithered back into the underground classroom where she had originated. That Gaz had been transferred to a skool in a hostile country by the army as a weapon of terror. That Gaz had gone into labor. That Gaz was lurking in the skool's vents and was listening for those who spoke ill of her and was now plotting vengeance. Nothing was ever really spoken of Zim. Most never even noticed him when we was there.

Zita ignored it all for she knew the truth, such as it was. That Gaz and Zim just graduated from skool so they could get a better handle on their responsibilities. So they could enjoy a marriage and have that kid in the picture someday. Zita felt honored in a way. She was only one of two or three people who had ever really gotten a glimpse of what lay in the heart of Gaz the Dark Fury: A person who took their responsibilities for the people under her authority seriously and without thirst for power or greed. Who hadn't asked or demanded it out of ambition. Yet who hadn't shied away because it was thrust on her without her approval. A wife's love for a very strange husband and who wanted that marriage to last a lifetime. To flourish and grow in the years ahead. And by far the most amazing of all? A mother's love for a child that wasn't even conceived yet. Who wanted to hold that child so much that Gaz carried a simulated picture of that girl with her.

Who would have ever thought that anything even remotely like that could exist inside that shell?

* * *

The manager of _'The Wedding Hut_' was ending his services. He eyed the couple before him again. The young man was _very_ young, and wearing a black trench coat. He was nervous, yet happy and kept looking at his bride. She on the other hand also looked young, at least from what he could tell from the alien costume makeup, but was wearing grey fatigues with the name 'TAK' stenciled above the left breast pocket. Obviously military. She was also wearing a small white wedding veil for the occasion. She looked extremely happy, like she had been waiting for this moment all her life. But nervous as well. A certain trepidation that couldn't be hidden even behind those solid purple contact lenses in her eyes that matched the groom's subtle expression.

_Yeah, definitely pregnant._ thought the manager. He had seen it often enough. The two family members seated nearby were also young. A young man who seemed to be feeling queasy with that green tint to his skin, and a girl with purple hair who wore a large wedding ring on her finger. Not potential customers. Beside them were their pets, a cat and a strange dog standing by white buckets.

What seemed strange to him was that the bride had put on the full face and arms of her costume, but had neglected to change into the outfit. But hey, the customer is always right. It wasn't like it was the weirdest thing he had seen this week.

It looked early for the groom, but he was definitely into his bride. She had clearly been sold long ago. A guy who was determined to do right by his girl. "And by the power invested in me by the state of Nevada, I pronounce you Paranormal Investigator and Alien Wife. Now go ahead and kiss your girl," the manager said with a grin.

Dib lifted the veil over Tak's antennae and kissed her bashfully. Tak reached over and drew him in. They broke off, collected and signed their marriage license, and walked down the aisle with Zim and Gaz trailing them out of the building with Mimi and Gir following closely with their buckets.

As they exited the building Mimi silently communicated with Gir. _Are you certain this is the custom?_

_Ohhhhh, YES! Computer explained in detail,_ Gir radioed back. _Now begin throwing!_

Mimi and Gir uncovered their buckets as Dib and Tak walked to Tak's ship and the nearby Voot Cruiser. Then they began throwing white lab rats at the newlyweds. Zim collapsed, howling with laughter and Gaz couldn't help but chuckle as well. As least Gir had gotten it close.

"Gir! That's supposed to be white _rice_. Not white mice!" Gaz called after them as Dib and Tak were pelted with white rodents. From the looks of things, it seemed that the couple didn't even seem to notice in their excitement. "And Tak! Remember I want you back at the base in thirty minutes! Your day isn't over yet!"

Tak's ship hovered and left the parking lot, waiting to gain any altitude until it left the city. Gaz pulled Zim up off of the ground and called to Mimi and Gir to get in the Voot Cruiser. "Come on Zim, I need to stop by my house and get my overnight bag again. There is no way I'm getting any sleep there tonight, and I said we'd baby-sit Mimi and Gir. Besides, it's been too long since we both played down in my Gaming Den. I've missed my partner."


	23. Chapter 22

A/N: My thanks to last chapter's reviewers. You guys are appreciated. Canadafangirl11, Zerg170, memmek10k, and CatGirlFireflare. Plus cold blue at the last minute. I was just about to post this chapter. You have awesome timing!

Coldblue: To answer your question, I don't plan on alien invasions. That is several years down the road and beyond the scope of this story, which is leaving me exhausted as it is. I do have an idea for having them launching an attack against Santa Clause, and would like to know if some writer would like to develop this one further. Plus the 'Earth gets invaded by enemy aliens' had been done quite a bit. Have always planned on doing something else, and have been hinting at it through out the story. Fortunately I have at last reached a point where I can start the endgame sequence with the next chapter as all elements are now in place with this one. It was a lot of hard work, but I hope you guys will like how I plan to end this story. Just need to write it. Lol.

To be honest, I don't see anything they do as impressing the Irken Empire. Let's face it. The Tallests are total jerks. Impressing the _smallests _ of the Irken Empire. That might be possible. But again, beyond the scope of this story. Also, Zim can get his hands on black hole projectors. I don't know how more advanced you can get than by shooting black holes at people. Plus it's sort of rough on the real estate. Lol.

* * *

Gaz sat before the large computer system down in her Gaming Den in Zim's base. Lines of text ran up the screens before her and she was shaking her head. Zim was up on the surface level with Gir and Mimi reciting a long list things not to sabotage, dismantle, explode, bake, rearrange, touch, look at and so on. Gir had the attention span of a gnat and Mimi simply was under no obligation or inclined to listen to a thing Zim commanded. Gaz figured it would take at least another thirty minutes for Zim to reach a point where he could give up and follow her suggestion of asking Mimi to keep Gir occupied by pretending to throw an imaginary piggy and having Gir try to fetch it. Gaz also had no doubt that Gir would find a way to succeed, which would perplex Mimi and keep her occupied too.

She went back to the reports on her displays. Things had definitely gotten out of control back in the Irk system where _Doomwind_ was currently in a new parking orbit much closer to the hypergate. The raid on the genetic repository hadn't been as bad as she first suspected. In fact given the intelligence level of the galaxy overall, it looked like they had gotten away with it and no one would ever suspect a thing. But then there was _Doomwind's_ dramatic and nearly insane maneuvers within Irk's orbital traffic shell. That must have drawn a lot of attention.

Then there was what Tak had said this morning about the other female Irkens aboard _Doomwind_. It was reinforced by Beed's comment in his report that he had supported Lim's instructions for the entire female complement to take as much downtime as they needed and required a mandatory six hours of PAK maintenance. Gaz was familiar enough from Zim's own PAK maintenance cycles to know this was significant. Under normal conditions an Irken only needed perhaps two hours every two or three days, and only needed a longer time sleeping when they had been skimping it for a while.

"Computer?" Gaz called out with a sigh. She couldn't really fault any of their actions, but the final responsibility for what happened fell on her and Zim.

"Yes, Mistress?"

"Please open a scrambled channel to _Doomwind_. I would like a private word with Beed and Lim."

Gaz had to wait nearly ten minutes before both Beed and Lim were ready. The girl held her temperament in check as she waited. She knew she was still moody from the hormones left over from the process of having one of her eggs extracted, and Computer informed her that Lim was nearing the end of her own mandatory maintenance period. Beed had gone to wake her up early, and eventually both Irken's voices sounded in her headset. True, she could have done this over video communications in the computer lab, but the Gaming Den was Gaz's domain within Zim's base.

"Beed, Lim. I would think that you have been expecting my call," Gaz began.

"Yes, Lady Gaz," Beed's voice spoke.

"I've been reading your accounts, and I can't say I am very happy with this. You lost control up there Beed. You allowed an unsanctioned military strike to leave the ship and attack a high security facility on your homeworld. And by your own admission, you didn't even question it until after they had returned! If things had gone badly, do you think _Doomwind_ would not have been declared a renegade vessel and destroyed by the whole Armada? You're parked right next to it, Beed! You're little escapade up there could have been seen as an act of war with Zim and I being held responsible. Not to mention dragging my whole planet into it."

Not that Gaz truly cared much about Earth. That was supposed to be Dib's thing. But she wouldn't want to be responsible for getting it invaded either.

"Yes, my Lady," Beed said in a downcast voice. Gaz could practically hear him looking at the deck plates.

"And you, Lim. I don't even know what to say to you. You didn't just passively let Tak go. You didn't just help her. You _organized_ an attack group." Gaz took a few deep breaths. She didn't want to cause anyone to see death looking at them like she had with Tak this morning, and she was less in control of her 'presence of doom' than usual. So Gaz bit her tongue about how Lim's actions were technically treason in the eyes of the Empire. "Lim, just let me ask you this. Could you have stopped Tak?"

"No, Lady Gaz," Lim answered. "Her bond had been violated. Even unbounded Irkens know that there can only be one response to such a thing. She was going to go down alone, armed, and make demands while her SIR unit stole her egg sac back. To try to stop her would have declared us as an enemy against her. To let her go alone would have been a disaster, and none of us females would have wanted to do so. Tak wasn't the only one who had been harvested for her egg sacs."

Gaz ran a hand through her hair. To be honest, there was fault enough to go around. Tak had become the ranking Irken onboard, and known to be less than steady. None of the other Irkens were really programmed or trained in their military. They were all basically grunts, the lowly ones who did the sensitive dirty work that kept their civilization going when robots or prisoners were not suitable or too expensive. Neither Zim nor Gaz had the background to give them a real chain of command in such independent circumstances. Gaz just got out of hi-skool and Zim had been set up to operate alone.

This had started off as a straight forward logistics endeavor to keep Zim supplied with essentials had the Tallest cut off his supply chain when they had first bonded. Things had taken a different course, and they had not adapted. Or more accurately her Irkens had adapted without oversight, something that they were not supposed to do. They were smallests, and suddenly been given free rein. To be honest, they had performed superbly under the circumstances.

And Gaz couldn't fault their actions either. Not without feeling like a hypocrite.

"You know Zim and I are responsible for your conduct out there. We can't condone the raid. Even if it I can agree with it. If someone had done that to me, I would have shown no mercy or restraint like you did. Do you understand, Lim?"

"Yes, Lady Gaz," Lim answered, expecting further pronouncements from her rightful Taller.

"Good," Gaz responded. "If anyone asks, you were all duly sentenced with exile to Earth." She could imagine Lim's expression of confusion as they were going to be stationed on Earth anyway, and the original thirty of Gaz's guard had already been ordered away rather than going through the effort to have them deactivated. "Beed, how close is the ship ready to depart for home?"

There was a pause before Beed answered. "The final shipments are due to arrive in twenty eight hours. We'll just be keeping the large containers in the landing bay. Perhaps two more hours to lock everything down. Another hour for final refueling. Then a few more minutes travel to the hypergate."

"Beed, Lim. Once you arrive I'm pulling first squadron off of _Doomwind_." Gaz could imagine this as being seen as a punishment and a sign of her lack of confidence in them. "I had already decided to transfer the Spittle Runners off the ship to operate from the new base. _Doomwind_ is going to be laid up for a while, and she can't launch anything while docked inside the base. You've both done well, but you're my personal guard. Not capital ship officers. Tak is the closest we have right now, and she's going to be grounded at the base for some time. So this is not a reflection on you."

"We understand, Lady Gaz," Beed stated. It sounded like he did.

"Good. Then could you leave me and Lim to have a moment? Just us girls?"

A minute passed after Beed was dismissed. "You wished to speak to me alone?" Lim asked.

Gaz could hear the trepidation in her voice. "I just wanted to know how you and the other girls were doing," she stated. "Tak said you were having difficulty with what happened to you. I didn't think you would want to talk in front of the guys."

"Thank you for the consideration, Lady Gaz," Lim said. "We just don't talk about it. Not even among ourselves."

Gaz didn't say anything. She just let the silence draw itself out.

"I mean how can we?" Lim asked, breaking the unnatural pause. "We are Irken. We don't have or become parents. We don't have offspring. We don't _do_ these things. That is done in the automated smeet factories far underground."

Gaz took another moment before speaking. Even without a video feed, the strain was coming through loud and clear through her headset. "I understand that you and the others brought some more Irkens onboard. Descendants."

"We did," Lim admitted. "We needed to do something. Give them a chance for something better."

"Do you have any with them?" Gaz asked.

There was a nervous pause. "I have one left. A smallest female. The two males died some time ago."

"What's your daughter's name?" Gaz asked.

"I don't know, and I don't want to know. I still want to be Irken."

Gaz didn't know what to say to that. But she didn't doubt that the others involved all had similar things to say. But she didn't miss the note of sadness in Lim's voice before she asked for a name and the defensiveness after. Or the fact that every one of them had tried to do something for the offspring they hadn't wanted. "I'm sorry."

Apparently Lim misunderstood. "Lady Gaz, please! Don't send them away. I know we brought them without permission. We asked Tak to speak to you in our behalf."

"It is all right, Lim," Gaz told her. "We won't send them back. I am sorry about the difficulty you and the others are facing right now. I know it is not the same because I'm human, but when Zim and I first realized we had gotten married it was difficult to openly admit that he was now my husband. Even to myself. It was troubling to use that word for him. I had to be prodded to open up about it, and that it was okay to admit that deep down I actually wanted this to be part of my future. Lim, it would be good for you to open up about what you are all going through as well."

Lim didn't say anything. Gaz knew that this sort of thing was not really her strong point. More like being the cause for people to seek therapy, not mediating group healing. And it sounded like that was what was needed. "Lim, I would like you all to write me a short passage. It can be about what you think about all this. What was done to you. What you feel, how you see yourself knowing that you had offspring made without your consent. And how you feel about them. I would like them in an hour so we can find someone to help you through this."

Gaz touched the tender spot on her abdomen where the puncture mark was. "Lim, you all made a provision for your offspring by bringing them aboard and trying to give them a better place. It's not wrong to care about those who came from within you. Even if you didn't ask for it."

She and Lim ended the call, and Gaz sat for a moment. Then began typing away at the computer system in front of her. Then made a call to Dib. Perhaps there was a way to kill two birds with one stone.

* * *

Alpha and his crew sat in the military base's cafeteria with their laptops running. They were off duty, being that it was now evening in their part of the world. They had earphones and small portable microphones jacked in, and were using the base's ultra-speed internet connection for their twice weekly CWZ get-together. The new version of _CWZ II: Online_ was operational with one beta server available for the finalists from the game convention. The official servers would not be open to the general public for another five months, but the beta test server was running smoothly.

Their game avatars were hard pressed at the moment trying to hold a forest village. Their Razor Squadron was working with the Proper Villains against a three squad team. Right now traffic was up as it was lunch in parts of North America and just after breakfast in others.

Echo's VTOL fighter was alone in the air above the village. "Brainmeats' tank section is pulling back behind their lines for repairs," he said as his fingers danced over his keyboard sending his fighter into a barely controlled spinning turn, dumping flares as several missiles and two streams of autocannon fire sought to bring his aircraft down. "The Housewives' still have three APCs up and running."

"Are they close enough together for another orbital strike?" Bravo asked as he cut loose a long burst from a window into the treeline from his heavy infantryman's light autocannon.

"Negative. They learned pretty fast after last time," Echo responded. "They are scattered across coordinates F-5 through H-6."

Alpha pressed a hotkey and spoke into his mic. "Villain One, Razor One. You still with us?"

"Roger that," said the Proper Villain's leader through Alpha's earphone. "We're still taking time-on-target indirect fire from the Brainmeat's, and down one APC with two Rocket Tanks left. We're still south of the village and moving west while their aircraft are still down. Maybe we can evade their fire for a bit. My two engineers can't keep up with all theirs _and_ their rate of fire. We didn't pick up one of those new ammo hauler GEVs. I'm sure they did."

"Understood," Alpha replied back. "Just try to keep your own fire on them as you move. The Housewives' APCs will pound the houses we're in flat if they think you're out of action. We're taking mortar fire, but most of it seems to be in your direction to keep your engineers buttoned up. The Posers have an infantry squad in the tree line to the north, and they are just waiting for an opportunity to move in. My sniper can't get past them to deal with their engineers."

"Will do. Give us a ping and we will put some mortar fire on that infantry squad."

"On it," called Charlie as he took a snap shot from a second story window with a sniper rifle, and a location pinged on their team's minimap.

There were several more minutes of minor maneuverings from window to window, and trading mostly ineffective fire at maximum ranges. The village was surrounded by clear fields in the middle of the large forest map.

"Alpha, the Brainmeats are coming back up," Echo said. "Looks like another push. They are mixed with the Housewives' APC's, and there are two fighters covering their airspace."

"Everyone, smoke grenades. Use them all," Alpha commanded. "I want the whole front covered. Charlie you cover the tree line. Bravo, make a lot of noise with that autocannon of yours. Delta and I will head back to the southern end of town and jump back into our Gun Tanks. We'll move in behind your houses." He hit his hotkey again. "Villain One? Looks like their going for another push. Maximum effort this time. How are you doing?"

The Villain leader's voice spoke again. "I've been rotating my guys back to the ammo depot one at a time. Two APC's, Three Rocket Tanks with one loaded as a mobile SAM site. Sending APC's to the east and tanks to the west. If you can hold your line, we can hit them with a pincer attack on both wings from the treelines on either side."

"Do it," called Alpha. "Echo, we need those aircraft gone. We can't let them see what the Villains are up to."

"On it," the professional fighter pilot replied. "It will be ugly, but consider their CAP gone."

As units maneuvered into their positions, Echo's fighter dove after the two hostile aircraft rippling off AAm's. Three, then four streams of autocannon tracers spat from the Housewives' APCs in the trees. All three aircraft fell from the sky.

"I'm down," notified Echo as his respawn counter cycled. "I saw the other two eject."

"Roger," Alpha said, pressing a key. "Villain One. We shut down their eyes. But you better move fast."

"Razor One. In position in two minutes," called the Villain leader.

A brief message was logged into Alpha's text box. As the team leader he got notifications the others didn't. And this message had a competition's first place award icon attached to it.

_ Squad Impending Doom is now online_. Alpha mentally crossed his fingers. _ Impending Doom is loading into the blue team lobby._

Alpha hit his hotkey. "Anyone know how long until the Walker respawns?"

Villain Three spoke over the communications link. "I think about another five to seven minutes. Too much time to make a difference."

Alpha keyed his hotkey once more. "All units clear the area. Evacuate the village now." He consulted his map. "Villain Squad, form blocking positions heading zero-one-three at coordinates K-6. Echo keep the sky clear. Maximum aggressiveness. Forget about the points we'll give up."

As Razor squadron's vehicles began pulling out of the village behind the smoke screen, the Villain leader spoke up. "Razor One. What are you guys doing? Holding the village is the mission objective."

"Villain One. The Wind and Whirlwind are logged in. The village just became a nuclear target."

"Oh hell," the Villain leader swore. They had been on the receiving end of what _Impending Doom_ could do at the CWZ convention. "I guess they're on our side since you got the popup?"

"Does that really matter?" Alpha asked in return. Whirlwind had been shown to be willing to nuke his own position and wipe out his team along with all opposition. They definitely played by their own rules. "Can I get your APC's to crank out smoke rounds onto the village? Blanket the whole area. And get that ammo hauler."

Charlie keyed his own microphone. "And don't forget, guys. We've got friendly fire on, so don't accidentally shoot down The Wind. Her husband will definitely nuke the whole team who did it two seconds later."

Alpha drove his vehicles our of the village and into the forest as fast as they could. "Wind, Whirlwind? this is Razor Alpha. Are you there?"

A familiar girl's voice which promised no quarter sounded in his ear. "Alpha, this is Wind. Yes, Whirlwind is with me. Spawning in now."

"We're coming in to switch out GEVs. Echo is up establishing air supremacy. Proper Villains are on our side and moving into a blocking position at K-6. Estimate Walker will respawn in five minutes one klick east of their position."

* * *

"Understood. Will be joining Echo in a minute." Gaz released the microphone's hotkey.

"Zim will take a Scout GEV to the Walker's spawning position."

Gaz reached behind her and patted Zim's arm. "Thanks, Zim. I've really missed this. Especially playing this with you."

Zim reached behind him and grasped her hand. "Zim had not realized that he had missed ravaging virtual humans with you as well."

Gaz let out a laugh at this. She looked up at the nearby wall. The room was still mostly undecorated. There were only three things displayed up on the wall opposite the Den's doorway. On a small wooden shelf was the pan of fruitcake that was their prize from the CWZ competition. Next to that was a full page press release with their picture announcing them as the winners. Then hanging last in the line was their marriage license with their scrawled signatures.

She didn't let go of Zim's hand for a few more moments. "Zim. I don't regret anything that day we won the competition. I'm glad we found ourselves married that night. That we're together."

"Yes, Zim is grateful that we are love-pigs. Now, lets _destroy the humans!_"

Gaz laughed again as she dropped his hand and grasped the throttlemaster before her. "Not all the humans, Zim. Just the ones on the other side."

Zim let out a mock sigh. "Fine, fine. Zim will try to blow up only the opposing humans," he said half jesting.

The human girl glanced briefly at the wall next to her as she guided her avatar's VTOL fighter into the cybernetic sky. It seemed now there was something missing. "Zim? After this is over, let's have computer take a picture for a family portrait to hang up on this wall. A picture of you and me. Irken husband and Human wife."

"Very well. Less talky, more shooty," said Zim.

Looking back, Gaz could see Zim's face reflecting in his displays. She could tell he was smiling at the suggestion. Gaz turned her attention as she flew her aircraft up and took a position on Echo's wing.

"Computer? Have you traced down the IP addresses?"

"Yes, Mistress. The trace program has infiltrated the server. Any one who plays the game will have their IP address transmitted to me and I can cross reference public databases for locations and professions. Anyone with military, security, or "pro-alien" profiles with technical backgrounds will be relayed to the third-party computer Dib has set up at your residence. It will be accessible by himself, General Tak, as well as Agents Darkbootie and Tunaghost. The Swollen Eyeballs will examine things more thoroughly from there."

"And the Razors?" she asked. Computer had checked the number Gaz had been given earlier, and the number had been changed recently.

"I have them. They are all in one location at a military base. I also have recent number changes from the local phone company. One address matches a recent change and the one I had previously established from the registration entries from the CWZ convention database. I also have their full names, addresses, employment records and so on."

Gaz released her joystick for a moment to press a button on her wristwatch. "Dib? We're ready here. Uploading now. And I have two addresses for the drop-offs." She disconnected the line and focused back on her game. "Computer? You may proceed. Just be careful with the British Military's computer network. Don't set off alarms or leave any traces. Those things can be a bit temperamental."

* * *

Suzan of the Angry Housewives sat in her home in front of her computer. Her avatar drove her APC behind the Rocket Tanks and supporting infantry of the Imbalanced Brainmeats and Simulated Posers. What she really wanted was to continue her squad's long standing feud with their ex's, also known as the Drinking Buddies. But those losers wouldn't get off of work for a few more hours. But then again, her girls would be warmed up and the Buddies would stressed from a full day of work and unhappily sober.

"Housewife One, this is Brain One. We can't see a thing in the village. They are laying in a ton of smoke rounds. But we aren't receiving any fire either."

"This is Poser One. My sniper reports no contacts. But visibility is limited."

"They are really getting heavy in the air," Brain One reported over the communication link. "They have two pilots in the air. We didn't get a read on the one. He came in from above and tore my guy to pieces. But the other is definitely Echo."

Poser One cut in. "Too bad the Crimson Shields aren't online. They have a couple pilots with them. So do the Dragon's Fangs."

"Focus, guys." Suzan admonished. "Keep your game faces on. Keep moving forward."

They entered the smoke obscured village. The haze wasn't just in the fields in front of the village, but nearly smothering it as well. APCs, tanks and infantry continued to move in, checking initial streets and alleys, huts and buildings.

There was no one there.

"Where are they?" Brain One asked. "Visibility is fifty feet at best."

"Give me a minute," Brain Four's voice came through. "I'll get back up in the air. Try for low altitude passes."

"I'm more interested in what they are up to. There is too much haze for just a few grenades and APC smoke rounds," Suzan said over her link.

They reached the village center, and smoke rounds from APC mortars were still coming in. In fact, there were _a lot_ of smoke rounds coming in.

"I don't think they are here, Housewife One."

"I have my sniper in the second story building above the smoke screen. He sees APCs in the treeline to the south with one Rocket Tank as escort," Poser One reported. "Smoke covers the whole area."

"Give me a count," Suzan demanded.

"Yeah. He says seven APCs. All of them have their mortars in rapid fire. They have an ammo hauler with them."

"They don't want us seeing what they are doing. But I don't get it. They are going for a point blank range battle environment, but they know we have tanks. We'd chew their APCs up. And why did they leave on their own? Sure the Villains must have been low on ammo, but it only takes one guy to go back for an ammo hauler or rotate them back for resupply."

The soft pops of smoke rounds impacting became intertwined with the sharp detonations of high explosive rounds.

Poser One called in. "My guys are taking cover in the perimeter buildings. They may try to sneak a couple infantry in though the smoke screen."

"Understood," Suzan said. "But that's doubtful. Have your sniper ping locations. We'll take up positions along the southern streets and form a firing line. When you ping our map, we'll blanket the whole area with fire. Their mortars can't really hurt our armor."

"Something doesn't add up here," Housewife Two stated.

"Nothing about this makes sense. But all we have to do is hold our position for the last ten minutes and we win," Suzan said as she began firing her own mortar tubes in her APC.

"Seven APCs, one Rocket Tank, one ammo hauler to the front. Two fighters in the air," Housewife Two added up. "That's eleven."

"Posers on the lookout! We've got an extra squad out there!" Suzan called out. "Wives and Brains defensive positions! Have that sniper do a headcount. Look for new tags!"

"Negative on new tags," Poser Three reported. "That's all the Razors and Villains down there."

"The new guy is up with Echo," Poser One deduced.

"Keep the chatter down," Brain One ordered. "Our fighter is getting back up in the air."

A few moments went by. "I'm back up," Brain Four reported. "They are practically circling our base to keep me out of the sky. Moving to engage. Missiles away, flares away. I see the Razor pilot. Completely evasive now. Can't see the other one. Dang! Whoever that is cut into me with cannon fire. Ejecting. He came at me from straight up above me."

There was a slight pause over the communication link. "That's The Wind up there! It's Impending Doom!"

Suzan went bug-eyed before her computer. "_Where's the Walker_?" she nearly screeched.

"Whirlwind is in the game! Everyone out now. He's going to nuke the village! Posers catch a ride as the APCs pass," Poser One commanded in a stressed voice.

Vehicles spun around and sped back north through the village and toward the safety of the treeline. Suzan hit her hotkey. "All Housewives on air defense. If you can see a missile trail, try to shoot it down."

There was a rapid series of white streaks at ground level, and a Rocket Tank to the left exploded.

"I'm down," cried Brain Five. "ATm's. Don't know where from."

"Air strike! I've got ATm's incoming!" came another voice.

"Airspace is clear," Housewife Four announced.

"I've got ATm's too!" called two other players in the confusion.

All their vehicles went wild into erratic evasive maneuvering in the thick smoke. Explosions went off in and around the disintegrating formation. Two more Rocket Tanks were hit, trailing black smoke of severe damage. Then an APC blew up.

"I'm down," called Housewife Three. "That wasn't an ATm. We've got I.F. missiles incoming too!"

"Dang it!" cursed Suzan. They had retreated straight into a kill zone. "Does anyone see Whirlwind?"

"Are you kidding? I can't even see the freaking forest!"

Suzan swerved her APC back and forth, sometimes in a half circle to confuse any targeting solutions. There were several near collisions and also several not so near collisions. There were no more sounds of explosions and missile warnings. Then a large armored leg whipped by her display. The bright blue flares of PPG fire began to race through the air as white hot missile trails of dumb fired ATm's smashed into targets.

"Walker in our formation!" she cried out. "Scatter! Scatter!"

"Aircraft inbound!" came another warning that was far too late.

One APC and three avatars on foot made it into the tree line while the Walker moved backward to the village. They were followed by one nuclear tipped missile.

* * *

An hour later, and players were logging off. Most lived in North America, and lunch was over or it was time to head to work or skool. Razor Squadron were putting their earphones, microphones and laptops away when a naval rating stepped up to the group, snapping a salute.

"Lieutenant Al King?" he asked.

The other Razors sucked in a breath through clenched teeth. Most of the Royal Marines on the base knew Alpha's intense dislike for his given name. But they also new that navy clowns were the most pathetic forms of life on the planet.

"Everyone calls me Alpha," he glared up at the rating. "Or else. What do you want?"

"General Clayworth was just called back in with new orders. The rest of his staff had gone home too, so he ordered me to go find you and instruct you to report to his office right away."

Alpha let out a heavy breath. "Alright. I guess I'll have to call the wife and tell her I'll be later than usual."

The lowly naval rating spoke again. "I'm afraid that is not permitted. Everyone called in is under communications blackout until further notice." He looked at all the computer equipment they were packing up. "You are to leave your cell phone and any other communications devices and computers with the sergeant major and the MPs. You'll find them in front of his office."

Alpha let out a groan. "Very well. I'll be there shortly."

"Very good, Sir. Now can one of you tell me where I can find Sergeant Brandon Brown, Corporal Charlie Green, Lieutenant Dylan Taylor, and Captain Evan Cooper?"

It was Bravo's, Delta's and Echo's turn to groan. The only one who hadn't thought their parents had lost a bet when it was time to name their child was Charlie.

* * *

Mrs. Alpha stepped up the walk to her home after a girl's evening out. Of course these days on a military base a girl's time out usually meant keeping a fellow Marine wife company while her husband was deployed. It could mean hosting a gossip party, seeing a movie or window shopping. Or talking with one during a troubled time and it seemed that military families had more than their fair share.

Fortunately tonight had been different. Twice a week her husband and the very local friends he had met over the Game Slave interlink hung out and played their game. Now after they had gotten back from the convention in America, they had this online version and stayed at the base after work rather than in her living room. It gave her a chance to go out with some of the girls off the base and do some silly civilian stuff.

She unlocked her front door, and spied the CD case tipped up against the doorstep. Mrs. Alpha picked it up and walked inside. She closed the door and set her purse down on the dining room table. Then out of curiosity she opened up her laptop sitting there and slid the CD in. A virus scan said what was on the disc was safe, and she opened the directory. There were only four files on the disc. Mrs. Alpha opened the first one, and dozens of short and long paragraphs were displayed on her word processor.

What she read horrified her. Each paragraph basically told the same story. The group seemed to be from a foreign area, because some of the terms were unfamiliar with her, and the culture was obviously very different. These military women were more upset about discovering their eggs had been used artificially to make children than about having their reproductive organs harvested. But that may be a psychological defense too. It almost reminded her of a call she had gotten a while back. She couldn't remember which one though.

There was a lot of strain within those tales, and clearly forms of denial. But these people had also responded by going on the offensive. It was not specified what exactly happened, but there was clearly some unsanctioned operation that had been carried out against a facility. And all of them had mentioned making space for their apparently grown child on their current assignment. Many were nervous about how this 'Lady Gaz' would ultimately respond.

The next file was of video. It had been edited with parts skipped over, probably both for time, context, and material. It was a communication recording and showed a very young man with black hair and a trench coat. It seemed he was on some ship somewhere, and he was talking about what his new wife had gone through, and her need for some sort of therapy.

_ "Her health is not in danger, but she's in bad shape. Tak is still sleeping right now, so they are going to go ahead and break her toes."_

_ "Gaz! Calm down. Tak is lame. She can't run anymore, and her limp puts too much stress on her knee which also gives her problems. This is part of her treatment so her toes can heal properly. Why do you think I would do such a thing?"_

_ "It was really bad for her down there. They would deliberately drop their loads to try to hit her pod. They didn't deliver enough food, so she was forced to hunt whatever it was that crawled around in that muck and eat the meat to survive. No ******* either for seven years. No way to clean herself, so she had a lot of infections, plus parasites from what diet she had. I was only down there for under two hours, and I'll never forget that place."_

_ "She weighs probably a bit less than half what she should, and there is damage to her digestive tract. That will all heal in time, but psychologically she'll never be the same."_

_ "Gaz, down on *** **** she almost went over the edge sanity wise. I don't mean crazy. I mean totally insane. But she saved herself. Tak pretty much destroyed her own spirit to do so, and it cost her almost everything on the inside. She's mentioned a few threats to one or two of your **** up here, but Lim figured out why and we've fixed that. Tak's got a real jealous streak in her, but she's not really in any shape to be a threat to anybody right now."_

This part had a strangely familiar girl's voice. _"Listen, Dib. If she's not going to recover mentally and she's unstable-"_

_ "I didn't say that. She'll recover, but she won't be the same. Some of her mental associations are backward, thinking **** as being dirty like Zim thinks ***** are. She has a serious thing about needing cleanliness and smelling clean, but that's understandable. Those things are probably never going to go away. She's hesitant about eating solid food thanks to the impact of eating meat had on her, but I think Tak will eventually overcome that one if we don't push her too much. Gaz, she'll always have mental scars. You just don't recover fully from that sort of thing. You learn to live with it."_

_ "Now I'm beginning to understand why you had to stay with Zim when he had his own thing. When they go down, they go down hard don't they? I have to help her, Gaz."_

Mrs. Alpha was full of empathy by now. These people were tough, but had also suffered and were struggling. She opened the third file. It was also text but unlike the others, it was addressed to her.

_Mrs. Alpha,_

_ I while ago I called you in the middle of the night during a time when me and my new husband were having difficulty facing our new life. You were willing to listen, to help me open up and gave me good advice. We are doing well now, and my husband and I found that we love each other very much. We have a relationship now, growing in our partnership. We haven't rushed into things. Like you told me, we've let things happen at a pace that is natural for us. I haven't moved in with him yet, but we are much closer to that than I ever thought possible. Thank you._

_ But now I have many people I am responsible for. They come from a conquering culture, but they themselves were the peons. I included their essays and other snippets from my brother's conversation with me about his own wife. They need help to adjust like you helped me. They need someone who will listen and perhaps give basic advice. No trained therapist can help them, because they are all different in ways one couldn't accept. Most of them just need someone to help them open up as a group and talk confidentially, like how you helped me admit that I wanted a life with my husband._

_ Right now, your husband and his crew are probably finishing up an online game with me and my husband. We teamed up with them during the convention and took first place. But most importantly, they already know what we look like. This is very important, but I can't go into that right now. You understand about sensitive information, but won't understand this point until you need to know. Soon, your husband and his crew will be given a unique opportunity for a transfer. But right now the one we really need is you. These people will be arriving Friday morning, and I have the responsibility to provide for their needs. To be honest, I don't know who else to ask this of. If you want to help these people, think about it carefully. Once involved with this project, there is no turning back. If you accept, you will understand why._

_ Arrangements have already been made for travel, and all necessities will be cared for. Eventually you may be able to commute if you wish to remain at your residence, but know that this is a long term and very confidential project. Secondary accommodations will be provided whether you choose to stay on the base or not. _

_ The fourth file is special, and won't unlock until the first three are accessed. It contains special features which will access my main computer here at the base, and its communications network. It will relay you to the ones who did the writing you read. The image will be blurry to protect their identities. Give them a chance, please. Then decide for yourself. The program will erase all trace that any of this ever happened at the end of the session. When you try to eject the CD, your computer will burn over it rendering it useless first. The computer will also censor some words or phrases during the initial session. There are security concerns, so I am sorry for the intrusion. You understand._

_Lady Gaz_

It all sounded familiar, yet just out of reach of her memory. The secrecy and need for security made her nervous. But the testimonies she had read spoke louder. People had their organs stolen, and were dealing with the consequences alone. Another had been traumatized in many ways, forced to survive in terrible conditions. And their Lady was calling on her to do what she could.

She knew something about unofficial support groups, and how that sort of confidentiality worked. Mrs. Alpha opened the fourth file and waited. Nothing seemed to happen for several minutes until a message appeared on her screen. _CVE-1 Doomwind - Irken Military Base contacted. Message received. Wait while personnel assemble._

_They are on a navy ship_? she asked herself. She wasn't familiar with most naval abbreviations and the name didn't give her a clue about the size of the ship involved. But she had been around navy and marine families enough to pick up a few things. Many wore baseball caps with their assigned ship's details on the brow. DD indicated a destroyer. CL, CA or CG indicated some sort of cruiser. But anything designated by CV was a carrier. This was not a minor thing here. She didn't recall anything in the news or local gossip about a naval task force taking in refugees, but she supposed that any such thing would be classified given what these people had been subjected to.

It took almost ten minutes. Then a split screen appeared with one side having a very distorted view. In fact the video portion was almost pointless. There were a lot of green and grey almost-figures, but in a military environment that didn't seem unusual. The other screen was clear, and showed a girl with blue hair in grey fatigues with the name _Tak_ printed on it.

"Hello, my name is Mrs. Alpha. I just received a letter from Lady Gaz asking me to speak with you, but mostly to help you to open up with what you are dealing with. The way this works is that whatever is said in this room stays in this room. It does not get mentioned outside of the room, and we don't hold what is said against each other. We are here to support one another in a common difficulty. There are no ranks in this room, so all are equals here. We can begin with the first volunteer standing up and introducing themselves by their first name. Then state the difficulty you are struggling with."

Tak spoke up. "I see where you are going with this. On my mission to ****" Mrs. Alpha was surprised that the letter hadn't been kidding about a computerized censorship. "During my mission to ***, I studied the **** I ****. I placed a spybot on him, and he went to a secret meeting. I had thought that it was about something important to my mission, but it turned out to be just a bunch of **** who had been poisoning themselves. The part about confidentiality is accurate and applicable, but does not include being a threat to Lady Gaz, the ship, or others. That should be discreetly brought to the attention of myself or Lady Gaz. You do not spread it around the whole ship."

"Thank you for the clarification," Mrs. Alpha said.

"General Membrane, if this is true what are you doing in this transmission?" One of the blurry females asked. "You only had one egg sac, and it was retrieved. Not used. We were all there. You aren't facing what we are."

Another form, apparently the ranking female, addressed the other Irken. "You are out of line. The General will address that when its her turn."

"Group, settle down," Mrs. Alpha said calmly. "We only have a short amount of time, so who would like to go first?"

"I will," stated Tak. "I know the format, and my right to be here has been questioned." Her voice was defiant. Then her tone changed and her eyes downcast. "Hello. I'm Tak. And I am going to become a parent." There were gasps from the large blurred room. "I am now carrying a smeet, and at the end of my pregnancy cycle I will give birth to a daughter."

It took a long time to quiet the transmission. Then Mrs. Alpha asked Tak to continue.

"When I first found out, it nearly paralyzed me. My mind was completely overloaded. I know I am a disgrace to my kind. Yet I have discovered that I want this, and so does my mate. But I am afraid too. So many things can go wrong. If I just fall down too hard I could hurt the smeet within me. She may be fine and healthy or grow abnormalities which could kill her. I don't know which will happen, and need regular checkups to monitor my smeet. We don't have a *** for her, so her intelligence may be very limited. We don't know how badly."

Tak paused to collect her thoughts. "I am going to become the only mother of my kind. We know nothing about raising smeets. I was raised, taught from my own smeethood to fight and destroy our enemies. But now I am creating a whole new life within me. And without a *** she will be born completely helpless. I will have to teach her to function well enough to attend a **** skool when she is developed enough. It is frightening to face, and can be overwhelming to think about. I am anxious about all my mate and I may face. But I am proud too because my daughter, even if she can't be smart, will not be harvested like we were. She will have a chance for a natural life that was stolen from us by the **** ***. I have come to realize that it is not that we **** do not do these things. It is that we can't, because it was taken away from us when they harvested us. Like the rest of you I did not expect to be confronted with this. I did not intend to become pregnant with a smeet. However, I don't regret that I am. But unlike you, I am not alone in facing this, because my mate and I are in this together."

The image of Tak sat back down. "Thank you, Tak," Mrs. Alpha said. Something about this was strangely familiar. Something about another person who had been altered in some way. But she was sure she had never spoken to such a person. "Who would like to speak next?"

A blurry shape stood up on her display. "My name is Yat, and I have offspring. One male onboard, and he has blue eyes just like mine. He works with the rest of us in loading the cargo, but I hear he will be assigned to the computer core inspecting and adapting program subroutines and control interface systems. I see him walking down the corridors, and I know who he is. Who he came from."

* * *

The Razors stopped outside General Clayworth's office and left their cell phones and all their electronics with the Sergeant Major and the two MPs stationed with him outside the door. They were shown in afterward. They saluted the General sitting at his desk. He had several files, other papers, and a laptop scattered on the ordinarily neat surface. Clayworth casually and automatically returned their salute with barely a glance.

"Corporal Green, you are assigned to the 3rd Battalion, mechanized infantry company A, heavy weapons platoon. When you're not deployed your section is part of my base's security perimeter."

"Yes, Sir," Charlie confirmed.

"Sergeant Brown. You're with the 1st Battalion, infantry company B. 2nd platoon."

Bravo spoke up. "Yes, Sir. 3rd squad." It wasn't like he was the ranking sergeant for his whole platoon or anything. Most enlisted men and lower officers never got called in after standard hours before a General. As least not while they weren't deployed overseas or had seriously landed in significant trouble.

The General just grunted at this. "Lieutenant Dylan Taylor. Air Transport, helicopter co-pilot. And usual suspect when some navy hot shot in any Fleet Air Arm unit you're attached to asks about non-regulation nose art for their aircraft."

"For the record, Sir, I only do paper sketches." Delta said in his defense. "I don't actually advocate that they paint their craft. Not after the fourth time, Sir."

The General didn't comment further on this. Navy headaches with their uptight need for 'proper' order wasn't any concern of his. It wasn't like they ever spent time in the mud getting dirty. "Lieutenant Al King. 2nd Battalion, Light armor company D. Captain Robert's right hand according to him. Double as your company's unofficial intelligence officer."

"Yes, Sir," Alpha said.

"And last of all, Captain Evan Cooper. Call sign 'Echo.' You are rather unique, Captain. Originally a U.S. Marine Aviator until you were granted a hardship discharge to care for your terminal grandfather here in the U.K., and having no other family members to care for him. Dual citizenship from your mother's side, and you immigrated back here after your discharge. But crazy enough to enlist with us, knowing we weren't about to pass up on all that free aviator training the U.S. paid for. Technically you're with us, but attached to the Fleet Air Arm on base, and liaison officer with other American Marine Close Air Support pilots during joint operations."

"Granddad wasn't going to move to the States with me while he was still with us, and I couldn't stay grounded. Too much of a fighter jock. Sir," Echo said.

The General just muttered something about American cowboys that was just barely audible. They all ignored it.

"Well, gentlemen. I've been going over your files, and aside from some high aptitude test results, and fairly standard performance reviews that one could view as indications of borderline underachievers, I can't find one thing you all have in common. Not in your units, housing assignments, let alone in your respective duties. Officially none of you have ever crossed paths. Except that you all were granted leave not too recently at the same time."

None of the Razors commented on this.

"Now we received new orders, unusual enough that I was called back right in the middle of dinner. I was to accept this," he gave the laptop next to him a slight thump, "at the front gate from a Special Agent 'Nessie.' I nor anyone else is allowed to examine this computer or its contents. It will burn out its circuits and it's solid-state memory core if anyone inputs the wrong password. It will also do this at the end of its presentation, so you better have good memories. You five are also to be kept in communications blackout except under one specific circumstance under the orders I was given to instruct the MPs outside."

"I don't understand," Echo spoke for the group. He was the ranking officer under a General's scrutiny. Echo pointed at the laptop. "That is about us, Sir?"

"I wasn't given much background. Everything is under strictest Need-To-Know, and you five are the only ones who fall under that. You are not to divulge anything you see or hear on that computer to anyone. _Ever_. As far as anyone is concerned, you five are being given opportunities for a transfer to the United States. It is strictly voluntary until you formally accept. Then is becomes permanent, and you are _officially_ struck off the Royal Marine's active list and placed on indefinite reserve."

Something about the way he said 'officially' struck a chord with all five Royal Marines. In the service, one quickly learned the difference between official and unofficial. As in 'You and I never discussed this.' and 'I was out getting coffee when we painted the Admiral's wife riding your plane and dropping her tuna casserole on the enemy.'

"If I may ask, do you know who we would be reporting to?" Alpha inquired politely. Generals were known to be temperamental.

"You may. Your commanding officer would be a General Tak Membrane, and if you accept you will be promoted to new ranks and duties. That was not specified. But this is where what little I know gets interesting. I had our Intelligence staff do a public background check on this General. Not in depth enough to trip any red flags. She is Professor Membrane's daughter-in-law. Gentlemen, every nation's military on the planet has been trying to get a toe hold into Membrane Labs for nearly two decades with no results. Unless you count the better ways to preserve rations, new medicines, and other humanitarian necessities they have put out on the general market, all have been turned away. All that 'making our world a better world' crap. And now this General married into the _family_, and she or someone she represents is asking for you. From the undertone I got from this Agent Nessie, I get the feeling that this is just the beginning, and you five are on the ground floor.

"Now, I need to ask you this question. Have any of you recently had any contact with the Membrane's? Because each of you are being requested _personally_. You and only you."

"Not that we can think of, Sir," Echo stated. Others agreed with the assessment.

"Um. Sirs? That's not true. We worked closely with one at the convention. And we were just playing our online game with her," Delta meekly contradicted. "The Wind," he told his fellow Razors. "That's Professor Membrane's daughter. He called her during the finals at the convention."

"Bloody hell!" cursed Alpha. Then he recovered himself. "Excuse me General. I remembered something. She called my house in the middle of the night after we got back. Her husband was having troubles, and she needed to talk to my wife. Girl advice, sir. Her husband was former military too. What details I gathered was that he was a victim of some failed experiment. The really bad kind of failure, Sir. The kind we grant asylum for. There was some foul up and he got banished to the States. Her husband was formerly in some major black ops stuff, Sir."

General Clayworth cut him off from saying anything more. "Gentleman, I don't Need-To-Know. There has been no change in the Membrane Lab's policies regarding involvement with any military. I specifically called my superiors and asked. But this may represent an opportunity for us to get our foot in the door if something is changing. I want you to give this your consideration, but think it over carefully. That is all my orders allow me to say. And now I'm going home. If you don't report for duty by Friday evening, I'll have your answer and will have the paperwork filed so you don't have to be concerned with being AWOL."

They all saluted as he walked past them and out the door. The five looked at one another. Alpha steeled himself and opened the mystery laptop. It began to whir softly and indicator lights blinked on. Then a sentence appeared followed by an entry box for a password. _Sow The Wind, and he will use nuclear weapons._

Alpha took a deep breath and typed in an answer. '_reap The Whirlwind_.'

The screen blanked out and did nothing.

"Was that the right answer?" Delta asked.

"Had to be," Charlie replied. "We're the only ones who would get both references."

"Still nothing?" Bravo asked.

"Yeah," said Alpha. "I'm not sure what is wrong here."

The computer screen flashed _Voice print match. No unauthorized personnel detected._

Then a voice played over the laptop's speakers. They were flabbergasted when they recognized The Wind speaking. "Hello. You remember me. We were playing not too long ago, and my computer can hook directly to this laptop's wireless card with a satellite uplink. This is a recording. The onboard camera can see the door, and this will automatically cut out if anyone comes in. This is not a secure means of filling you in, but I will do what I can. Basically I'm inviting you here for a more detailed offer for a job. The short story is that my husband and I have been assigned a project, and some initial security personnel. But really they are refugees. They are tasked with our safety and any assignment we may give them. There are now two hundred coming in, but we don't have the background to give them a command structure they need. They also need help adjusting, and in training. To be honest, I don't know what to do with them, but they need me to provide them with duties to perform and a structure to function in. There have already been some times that things have gotten out of control. They are good crews, but some of them have been through some things. That is already being discussed elsewhere.

"That is the short term. You will see the long term once you accept my invitation to come here and learn more. But you will agree that it is important. I know this is not something to accept lightly. But know that once you're in all the way, there is a permanent transfer for you. That sounds bad springing this on you all of a sudden, but you will have access to the most advanced equipment, vehicles, weapons, medical care and anything else you may need or want. My husband and I have already worked with you, with good results. If you accept, you will get whatever you need.

"Arrangements have already been made. A flight has already been reserved for transportation. Should you accept my offer once we meet, we have temporary housing arrangements, and will set up something long term based on your requirements and preferences. Basically, anything you need or want will be provided. I don't know much about your families, but they are welcome too once you agree to transfer.

"But understand this. Once you are on board you may continue to represent your country or military, but you won't be taking orders from them. I would say that you would be taking them from us, but that is pretty melodramatic. The truth is that you will have a lot of say in your duties and assignments. We are looking for more people to bring in, but I've worked with you five as a team. My husband has too, to a limited degree, and that is saying something. So I'm asking you to form the core of my command unit. We will give you what ranks you think is appropriate. Think about it."

The voice message stopped, and the Razor's just looked at each other. They didn't know what to say. Then several lines of text appeared.

_1__st__ squadron, Personal Guard. 30 Interceptors. Commanding Officer Beed. Executive Officer Lim. Not negotiable._

_Alpha: To be Captain of the CVE-1 Doomwind. Also for any armor units, but not under development._

_ Echo: To be Commander Carrier Strike Group. 60 Advanced Harrier superiority and fleet defense aircraft. 15 - 30 Advanced Warthog attack aircraft._

_ Delta: Commander Air Cavalry unit. Currently 4 assault transports._

_ Bravo and Charlie: Options available on preference. Base Security/Ground Forces, Technologic Upgrading, Construction programs, Development, Squadron Commands._

_ This is just an initial proposal. Current personnel stand at 200 and will rotate duties, and your team is free to make adjustments. As requirements you feel you may need, provide a list and send to the address below. They will be waiting on the military airlift flight reserved for you._

A long string of numbers followed.

"Black ops?" Bravo asked.

"Black ops," Charlie confirmed. "Major black ops. But like none I've heard rumored. This is practically like a blank check offer with a boss' free hand to go with it."

Alpha didn't say anything. The others had missed one line. _Mrs. Alpha: Counseling._

Technical images began to pop up. First was a large vessel, and then two aircraft in other parts of the screen, along with what appeared to be a combat shuttle in a frame that was like nothing they had ever seen. Everything was shown in a wireframe format. They began to look at them one at a time, but Alpha wasn't really paying attention.

He shook himself. "What was that?" he asked.

"Look at this," Delta said, pointing to the large ship. "It looks like it has giant jet engines in the back, and a superstructure and turrets on the top _and_ bottom. Like it could shoot _underneath_ it's position. At first I thought it was a submarine, but now I think this is supposed to be an _aerial_ carrier. It can't be designed to _fly_. Can it?"

"Check these out," Echo pointed at the aircraft. "They look normal, but the specs say they are heavily modified. Vectored thrust vents on the Harriers swing a full one eighty degrees. Not just on the horizontal axis, but out away from the fuselage as well. Never seen anything like it. And on the Warthog, the engine pods _rotate_ a full three sixty. The maneuvering must be incredible, and the listed climb rate has to be a mistake as well as their combat radius."

"I'm guessing there _has_ been a change with the Membrane's," Bravo commented. "It really looks like they are making designs for a major conflict. But who would they need all this to fight against?"

"We're going to have to check this out," Alpha said. "How do we indicate-"

He was interrupted by a knock on the door, and the computer blanked out. An MP poked his head through the door. "Excuse me, Lieutenant King? Your wife is on the phone."

"I thought we were under strict blackout, Corporal?" Alpha said.

"Yes, Sir. That is true except for this one exception, and on speaker phone. But I have to stay here and take your phone back once you hear what she says."

Alpha took the cellphone from the MP. "Hello? That you love?"

"Yes. It's me. I just got done with a conference call. Group therapy session. Alpha? I got a letter. Several letters. The MP said I can't say much. I talked to these people on their ship. It's a carrier of some sort. They are due to arrive soon, and some of them of were victimized. They brought their children with them. I mean they are grown, but they aren't dealing with what happened. They need help with this. I know that doesn't make sense, but it would take an hour to relate what they talked about, and it was all in confidence. You know how that works, Alpha. But did you hear any word of refugees being rescued by the navy?"

"I'm sorry, Ma'am. You were told the conditions," the MP interrupted.

"We do have an offer. We can't talk about it, but General Clayworth said our new boss would be someone named Tak Membrane. Yeah, Love. Those Membranes. This won't be your usual 'spouse's of the lowly grunts' support circle you're used to."

"Alpha. I spoke with Tak in group. She didn't mention her last name. That's not done. Listen, Alpha. The reason you're being brought in now is because these people need help with something that happened to them. I'm the one they need now. I don't really know why me, but you didn't hear what happened to these women. And they are all in the service too. They have no other outlet. This is legit, whatever it is. I'm asking you to take the offer. I'm supposed to go now. We'll talk more when you get home."

Mrs. Alpha hung up, and the MP collected the phone and left the room, shutting the door behind him.

Delta poked at the computer for a few moments. It didn't respond for a full minute, then the screen came back to life. The vehicles displayed were still spinning in their views.

Echo spoke first. "Those are not design blueprints. That's actual hardware. Deployed hardware. I can't believe there is a freaking carrier flying in the bloody sky somewhere. You know what that means? It can literally be deployed _anywhere_ on the planet. And I don't think it would take weeks to get there either."

"No matter what, we have to check this out," Alpha stated. "But I am not going to just waltz in like some shmuck. And if my _wife_ is getting involved, you better believe I'm going in expecting trouble. For all we know, Membrane went insane and is building some mad scientist army. Okay, maybe not. But we don't actually _know_ he's not."

"We can't draw out weapons from the armory. Not without orders," Bravo pointed out. "And the brass get real ratty when pilots take their sidearms off base.

Alpha closed the windows on the screen. "Wind said that this thing was still hooked up, right? Satellite uplink or something? I bet we can send email. Let's send them a shopping list."

"Full battle kit?" Charlie asked. "Isn't that a bit overkill?"

"Why not? Let's see how cooperative they really are," Alpha replied. "They have taken precautions, or we wouldn't be going through this cloak and dagger dance. We'll show we have our own way of taking precautions."

"Don't ask for our standard SA-80s. I hate those pieces of crap," Charlie told Alpha. "Ask for HK-417's. Five hundred rounds each. Plus Glock 17's."

"Get a couple P-90's," Bravo advised. "If we face close quarters, I don't want to be swinging a big long battle rifle.

They completed their list in rapid time. They knew their gear. Helmets, body armor, eye protection and night vision goggles, and so on. They directed the list to the address provided and hit send.

A minute later a reply was sent back. _Your order has been received. Your requested supplies will be waiting on the reserved aircraft scheduled for Friday 1:15 am._

"No way," Echo exclaimed. "Not even a question about why we need it." He began typing at the keyboard.

"What are you doing?" Delta asked.

"Requesting one of those modified Harriers. Let's see how they react to this."

Charlie piped up. "Hey, ask for a Warthog while your at it." He looked at the others. "Hey, its not like they will actually send me one."

Echo pressed send. The return reply read: _Requested craft are available, and will be arriving on the tarmac in two hours under automatic pilot. The prototypes will be available for three hours only. Please understand that numbers are limited, and that the main cannon have been removed for future upgrades and advanced weapons are not yet available. Would you prefer conventional bomb or missile loadouts instead?"_

"Bloody freaking hell," Echo said. He sent a negative reply, and closed the window.

The screen cleared and a short message appeared. _Do you wish to attend mission briefing? Y/N_

Alpha reached over and clicked their acceptance. The screen went blank, and there was a smell of burning circuits.

They filed out of the General's office, and collected their things from the MPs. Echo dialed a number on his cellphone as the group walked down the hallway. "Fred? This is Echo. Can you get me the duty officer? Hello? This is Captain Evan Cooper. I'm letting you fellas know we just got word of an unscheduled fight landing in a couple of hours. Two American UAVs. Yeah, that's right. These are experimental, and one will be sitting here for about three hours. I need your ground crew to tow it out of the way to the Alert Five slots, and some MPs to keep anyone from touching the bloody thing. Yeah, I know someone screwed up the paperwork and it sounds bloody foolish. You know how the upper brass are. It's not like they have to deal with screw-ups. Thanks."

He turned to the others. "I've got to go. Have to file a last minute flight plan and get suited up, because I'm taking that thing for a spin if they're actually sending it."

* * *

Echo sat in the cockpit and plugged in his flight helmet and oxygen mask into their connections, and strapped himself in. The outside appeared fairly standard when he did his walk-around. The exhaust nozzles were clearly more advanced than a standard Harrier, and the skin of the aircraft was covered in some clear protective coating. Much thicker than paint. The markings were fairly standard, and even the tail numbers remained. But where national emblems were normally located, was a strange symbol made up of triangles and a black circle with a stylized skull in it. That made him nervous, making him think of mad scientists bent on world domination in poorly written movies. He put it out of his mind and focused on the task at hand. This was a chance to get some clues before they got in too deep.

The controls were very sophisticated and heavily computerized. But instruments and controls were familiar and in typical locations. Echo sealed the cockpit canopy around him. He glanced at the A-10 Warthog sitting in a parking space near the taxiway next to the jumpjet he was sitting in. MPs stood a respectful distance away. He knew as a pilot when he watched those birds land and taxi in that they were being flown remotely. No autopilot could follow traffic control's directions. "Now, let's start the checklist," he commented to himself.

He was startled when a computer voice sounded in his helmet's speakers. "Initiating pre-flight diagnostic. Primary power cell holding at 99.9% charge. Auxiliary power generator engaging for startup procedure. Main Computer nominal. Avionics and navigation system nominal. Thrusters and control surfaces nominal. Sensor array nominal. ECM and Senor Jamming circuits nominal. Guided Landing System nominal. Communications Uplink nominal. Weapons systems not currently installed. Fusion engine nominal and ready for startup. Life support is nominal. Inertial Dampening System online. Cockpit sealed and pressurized. All systems standing by."

_Fusion engine? As in _nuclear _fusion? Dear God, what the hell am I sitting in_? Echo asked himself.

* * *

There was a knock on the front door, and Alpha cautiously opened it a crack. He had been home for a few hours, had a quick dinner, and his wife had filled him in with what she could. It was difficult for Mrs. Alpha, wanting to open up completely but burdened with the demands of confidence entrusted to her. And Alpha hadn't been able to talk about what had happened either. The rest of the evening had been spent trying to convince his wife on the need to pack light. Hairdryers and magazines to read on the flight were not what Alpha considered packing light. If it all would not fit in a single backpack, it wasn't going. Mrs. Alpha was not pleased.

"Echo?" he asked, recognizing the pilot. Alpha closed the door enough to undo the chain, and opened it wide to let the marine aviator inside. "No offense, but you look like you've seen a ghost."

Echo walked in and collapsed on the couch in the living room. "Mind if I bother you for a drink? I think I could use one."

"Sure," Alpha consented. He opened up the fridge and pulled out two beers. He handed one to Echo and popped the top on his own, sitting next to him.

Echo took a long pull from his bottle. "Is it safe to talk?" he asked.

"Yeah. Wife went to bed. I was about to join her."

The jumpjet pilot looked at Alpha, and finally noticed he was wearing shorts and a white tank top. Echo started to apologize, but Alpha waved him off. "Echo, just spit it out man."

"Alpha, I fly the most up-to-date Harriers in the Fleet Air Arm. It took a lot of education and training to do that as a fighter pilot. That thing I just took up makes my Harrier look like a child's toy." Echo swept his hang through his messed hair. "That plane nearly flies itself, and most of it can be run on voice activation software. I mean, the airframe is definitely an American built Harrier. The controls look state-of-the-art but familiar. But underneath? It felt like the outside was just window dressing so a dumb jock like me could understand what I was sitting in."

Alpha motioned with his beer for the other man to continue.

"Someone gutted that plane and turned it into something else. I mean the thing has some kind of freaking _fusion_ engine in it. Not air-breathing gas-powered jet engines. I should have climbed out of that plane and ran. But like any jock too cocky for his own good I put that thing through its paces. Never even scratched its performance envelope. I don't think I even came close."

Echo took a swig of his beer. "I have to admit, I lost track of what I was doing. Night time flying you know. Black sky, black ground. There is no horizon to fly visually, and I was really pushing the maneuvers hard. I must have been pulling close to 16 G's and didn't feel a thing."

"You almost crash, I take it?" Alpha asked. Such a close call would shake any man.

Echo shook his head. "Alpha, you don't get it. Us pilots can take nine G maneuvers at most. Even then we need G suits and do special exercises to keep from blacking out, and we can't do it for long. I could have been doing double that just as easily as I am sitting here now. Something in there was canceling out G forces." He took another pull from his beer. "But no. I didn't almost run into the ground. More like the other direction. After flying that plane in ways that would have drained my Harrier's fuel tanks ten times over, I looked at my instruments and saw I was at two hundred thousand feet. Twice the altitude that any other aircraft on record can even reach. Yet still maneuvering as if I were at sea level, and still climbing as if it were nothing. After that I turned around and flew home."

Echo didn't speak for a few more minutes until he had finished his beer. "Alpha. There is not a fighter on Earth that could touch the plane I just flew. I don't even know what to call that thing. Its not an airplane. Not any more. Somebody rebuilt it to not need an atmosphere to fly in. And judging from the gunnery arcs from the schematics we saw of the ship, I'd say the same thing about that carrier. Keeping it aloft in midair would cost more than the ship itself."

Alpha got up and retrieved another beer for Echo from the kitchen. The implications were not lost on him either. "You think Professor Membrane cracked?"

"No," Echo said quietly, nursing his second beer. "He's too famous and always surrounded by his people. Someone would have noticed if something was wrong. Alpha, none of this is centered around him. It's his daughter, The Wind. Don't ask me how. But it is the only connection that makes sense. She's involved with something. Maybe she's the unseen arm of this shift in Membrane Labs."

Alpha shook his head. "I don't know. She's still in high skool last I heard. How involved could one girl be?"

"You're asking the wrong guy," Echo replied. "But I keep thinking back to when I was looking at the stars past the altimeter reading on me HUD. I was thinking that maybe someone would build a plane like this as a test bed to prove some point. But there are supposed to be _sixty_ more on the production line. Not just planes. Warplanes. Then you have this carrier. You don't tie up that much investment and build something like a carrier and a whole air group unless you think you need it. And you don't try to recruit military people to run it unless you think it might be used. Even then, you don't recruit total strangers into something this black. You start with the ones you know and worked with. That is exactly what The Wind is doing."

He polished off the second beer. "Call me crazy, but I'm starting to think that maybe the Membrane family knows something the rest of us don't."

Alpha took the empty beer bottles. "Come on, man. That's enough for one night. You can crash in the guest room." Alpha couldn't contradict him. He wasn't sure that Echo was wrong.

* * *

They had spend all Thursday tidying things up with their duties so others would be ready to take over in their absence with minimal disruption. In fact they had been so busy that they had not had time to think of anything else. Even Mrs. Alpha had been busy with last minute visits and calls to nearby friends to say that she was going out of town, making arrangements for someone to watch the little house she and her husband lived in, and getting up coming bills paid.

Afterward, they had been worn down and the men had taken the opportunity at their various residences to catch some sack time before facing the unknown. Their flight was scheduled for a little past one in the morning. Mrs. Alpha had packed a change of clothes, toiletries, and other basic necessities. Very basic necessities in her opinion. But then, Alpha was barely taking anything at all. Essentially just what he could stuff into his large pockets of his fatigues.

Two cars dispatched from the base had collected them, and drove them to the airfield to a waiting Royal Air Force Chinook helicopter. The pilot hopped down the loading ramp to meet them. He eyed his passengers briefly. Five marines in battle dress uniforms without their unit patches or other significant identifications that would tell someone precisely where they came from. The civilian woman was behind them, looking a bit intimidated and wearing a large backpack.

"Captain Evan Cooper? Lieutenant Dylan Taylor?" he addressed the other pilots he was taking aboard. They gave an affirmative. "Good. We're about ready to start her up. You're gear is inside. One of you wouldn't happen to have a rotary wing rating by chance?"

"That's me," Delta confirmed as they stepped up the loading ramp into the helicopter. Their gear was indeed piled up in plastic crates sitting in the middle of the stripped down fuselage, next to a large black and empty rubber blob strapped down very securely to the deck. "What is that?" he asked the pilot.

"That is why I don't have a flight crew," the pilot said. "Spare fuel bladder from a KC-130. The blokes in maintenance have been working the last eighteen hours stripping my bird down to bare essentials. Turned this thing into a flying gas can. We'll still have to stop and refuel in Northern Ireland before hitting our final leg."

Delta eyed the fuel bladder warily. "Isn't that dangerous?" he asked as he followed the pilot through the fuselage.

"Oh hell yes," the pilot exclaimed. "Probably why no one thought of it before. But the boys have it secure and I ran the numbers myself. We popped the windows out along the sides, and I'll fly with the loading ramp partly open. That should clear out any fumes from the fuel line running into the main tank. We've got it caulked up good, but you never know. As you can see, we don't have any seats back here. You'll just have to strap yourselves to the frame just behind the cockpit. Hope you weren't expecting a comfy ride." He handed them all ear plugs and ear muffs to wear as well.

"Lieutenant, if you will come with me?" the pilot motioned to Delta as they moved toward the cockpit. "I've got two refueling points and at least ten hours flight time ahead of me. And with our weight problem, I'm flying without a crew."

"I'm not checked out on one of these heavy lifters, Sir," Delta told him at they entered the cockpit compartment and strapped in to the seats.

"We'll do with the ten minute crash course to get you familiarized enough. You can navigate a straight line, can't you?"

"Yes, Sir," Delta protested. He wasn't an incompetent chopper pilot.

"Relax. This whole thing is down right peculiar according to the regs. But that don't mean it's not doable. I just need you to fly the course I give you when I need a break or catch a nap when we're past the Irish coast. I don't want to fall asleep on the return trip. Just wake me up if anything needs my attention."

"Understood, Sir," Delta acknowledged. "We're heading out to sea I take it?"

The pilot began flipping switches, and the jet turbines began their loud whine. "I'm taking you folks way out there. Not quite the middle of the North Atlantic, but you sure could see it from there."

Echo checked to make sure they were all their harnesses were snug, worn correctly, and tied securely by the safety lines to the helicopter's frame. Alpha turned to his wife. "Love, this is dangerous, and we don't really know what we're being dropped into. You can still walk out of here."

She looked at him with nervous eyes, but determination as well. Alpha just nodded his head. Echo got their attention. "All right. Everyone's secure," he yelled above the noise. "We've got a few more minutes before the engines are warmed up for take off and the pilot runs through his checklist. Let's get our gear out and dump the empty crates before we leave. Once we're airborne your safety harnesses do not come off until we land. Understood?"

Mrs. Alpha sat and watched as her husband and his online gaming friends changed before her eyes. They all had their Marine faces on, and not the average people she had always seen them as. They were in professional mode. Helmets, goggles, night vision gear were donned. Their harnesses were slipped off shoulders and back up quickly and precisely once their body armor was covering their torsos. Rifles were pulled out of plastic crates and slung over shoulders while cases of ammo and magazines were deposited at her feet. They had a business-like menacing look about them she had never truly witnessed before.

* * *

Rain pelted the windscreen before him and wipers quickly shoved it aside as Delta held the large helicopter on its course. It was almost six in the morning and pitch black outside. They were at about six thousand feet and below the thick clouds. There was another hour until they reached the designated waypoint over the ocean. Delta briefly reached over and nudged the helicopter pilot awake.

"What is it?" he asked as he reached for the controls and scanned his instruments automatically.

Delta nodded his head in one direction. "I have two engine plumes at two o'clock. Very small. Whatever they are, those are really hot engines. It's almost completely blue."

"I see them. Barely," The pilot commented. He thumbed a communications switch. "Attention aircraft bearing my zero-five-five. This is Heavy Lifter flight one-seven-niner-foxtrot. British Royal Air Force. Identify yourself."

A voice answered back. "Who are YOU to challenge the amazing ZI-"

Delta thought it sounded like _The Whirlwind_. But it was cut off by a grunt. Delta could have sworn someone's elbow was in the speaker's ribs. He keyed his own microphone sticking out from his flight helmet. "This is Delta. Whirlwind, it that you?"

A girl's gruff voice spoke through his helmet speakers. "Sorry about that guys. He forgot that he is _supposed_ to be on his best behavior. Glad you could make it. You are about fifteen minutes out from the actual rendezvous coordinates. Adjust your heading thirty five degrees west. We didn't anticipate rain, so we're not going to guide you to the ship. Drop down to four thousand feet and be ready to land near the superstructure. We're going on ahead. Expect radio silence."

The pilot looked at Delta questioningly, and he nodded his head in answer. The pilot spoke into his own microphone as he flipped down his night vision goggles. "Understood. Heavy Lifter one-seven-niner-foxtrot to alter course by thirty five degrees west and descend to four thousand feet for silent approach and landing."

* * *

Delta craned his head against the cockpit's side window. There was black sky, black surface, rain against plexiglass. Somewhere down there was supposedly a ship to land on. Then he spied a light visible with his night vision goggles down low. "Contact. Right, twenty degrees." All he could see was that little dot of light.

"I see it," the pilot said.

The light grew as they approached. Not quickly, but steadily. Then there was the faintest outline of part of a vessel as light too feint to be seen with the naked eye fanned out over a section of deck. As they drew closer, they could see two figures in the rain with large flashlights waving them up and down to form a landing cross on the deck.

"You have this?" Delta asked the pilot.

"Yeah, I got it."

Delta unbelted, racked the pilot's helmet, and awkwardly climbed out of his seat and moved back to the others. They appeared to be sleeping in the dim red light of the interior, or at least trying to. He slapped Echo's shoulder a few times and bent to shout in his ear. "We're up!" He yelled above the noise. Delta moved along to the rear of the helicopter to lower the loading ramp. He felt a slap on the back, and Delta reached back and took the P-90 Charlie handed to him.

Alpha removed the ear muffs from his head, dropping it to the floor and fastening his helmet. He leaned over to his wife. "Love, you stay behind us and in the chopper until we're on the deck. Keep a grip on Delta's harness. It's going to be real dark and wet out there. If you want to back out, stay on the chopper. Got it?"

He saw his wife nod silently. He could tell she was apprehensive, and he and the men weren't exactly projecting a calm environment for her. The truth was, they were nervous too and had no idea what they were stepping into once they left the helicopter's ramp.

He joined the others near the open loading ramp. "Remember, ready for trouble but not hostile. Understood?" He saw nods all around. "Okay. Ready."

They crouched by the loading ramp, flipped night vision goggles down, slapped magazines into rifles and chambered rounds. Alpha glanced back and saw his wife with a hand tightly gripping Delta's safety harness. "I see the deck. Ten meters. Safety lines off."

The helicopter touched down, bounced once, and settled firmly onto the deck. "Move!" Alpha commanded, and he, Bravo and Charlie swept down the loading ramp and took up positions to form a perimeter about twenty feet around the back of the helicopter. Crouched down with one knee resting on the slippery deck in a shooting stance, but rifles aimed downward. Ready to do business, but not openly hostile.

Alpha gestured with one hand, and Echo came down the ramp with Delta and Mrs. Alpha close behind. He knew his wife must be frightened with how he and the men were acting, but he would rather have her alive if they were stepping into something critical with unsavory people than calm.

Bravo called out above the noise of the jet tubines and rotor wash, and gestured with two fingers to his left. Two figures with flashlights were approaching them with what appeared in their night vision view to be thin cables stretching back to that light which seemed to be an open door leading into the superstructure of the ship.

They came up to them and clipped another set of safety lines to their harnesses. Then one of them with longer hair waved for them to follow them back into the ship and out of the rain. "Come on, guys," said a familiar voice. "My people don't want me out here with you and your guns much longer."

_A valid point_, Alpha thought. He wouldn't want a hi-skool girl out on a slippery deck over the ocean hundreds of miles from land with a bunch of marines standing by for trouble either. He issued a command to move out. Technically, Echo outranked him but he was the senior ground-pounder present.

As they moved crouched over through the helicopter's rotor wash toward the open hatch, Echo ran along side the craft and pounded on the cockpit three times to get the pilot's attention, then jerked his thumb skyward twice to indicate he could return to base.

Once they were all in the small compartment, the outer door closed and an inner one opened. The girl was running a small towel through her purple hair as safety lines were unclipped and automatically reeled back into recessed coils in the thick bulkhead. "It's good to see you all again," _The Wind_ said. "I know you have a lot of questions. We will answer them in due time. Dib, you want to lead the way?" She seemed unphased by Marines in full battle kit, as if they couldn't possibly be a danger to her.

Alpha sent a nod to the others, and they slung their rifles over their shoulders. The young man in the black trench coat led the way though the corridors. They didn't see anyone else present.

"Excuse me, Ma'am?" Bravo asked. "Where is everybody?"

"I asked that these corridors be cleared for the time being," _The Wind_, answered. "It's better that you and the crew be kept separated until after we have our chat."

Alpha noted that the girl they knew as _The Wind_ had a lot of pull on this ship. She had a definite command presence about her.

* * *

They entered a compartment and they were gestured to the several rows of chairs sitting before a short table where a laptop, projector, and two others were waiting. One seemed familiar, with a sickly green color to his skin. The other was another girl in grey fatigues. The Razors and Mrs. Alpha took their seats while _The Wind_ and this 'Dib' person took seats between the other two. As if they needed to be separated. Or wanted to be separated. It was hard to tell.

"Lady Gaz," the girl in the fatigues said. "Beed has informed me that we are still holding our position. Once the helicopter is a safe distance away we will resume making our way to the new base."

"Thank you," the purple haired girl replied. She was now the only one that remained standing. She faced the room before her. "And thank you for coming. I know we could have just sent you airline tickets and this is all a bit over the top, but I suspect our reasons for this are similar for why you are here dressed up for trouble."

She continued. "But before we get started, I want you to understand something. This is your last chance to back out. You must decide if you can handle what you are about to hear. It will shock your view of the world. If you can't handle culture shock and xenophobia, you need to leave now."

"Um, Ma'am?" Bravo asked. "We just got here, and someone went to a lot of trouble to bring us here."

"I know that," the one with the purple hair stated flatly. "But if we continue this and you can't take it, we will have to deal with it. And I'd rather not do that."

The one that looked sick handed her something, and she tossed it up in the air a few times like an apple. Something in Alpha's mind told him he should be worried about how that black sphere was being tossed around so casually.

She set it on the table before her, knowing she had their full attention. "We don't have non-disclosure agreements to sign. We don't have prisons or lawyers to threaten you with if you turn on us. What we have here is a stun grenade. You give me trouble and I stun us all. You won't be harmed, but you will have your short term memories erased while we are unconscious. And since we will be unconscious along with you, none of us will be able to countermand that. You will simply wake up at a hotel near the airport with tickets home and no idea how you got there. I would prefer to avoid that. You get where I'm coming from?"

Alpha mentally gulped along with the rest. _The Wind_ was definitely in charge here, and she wasn't one to mess around. She wasn't threatening them. She was stating a fact.

"Mrs. Alpha," the girl continued. "You were there for me when no one else was, and gave me good advice regarding helping my husband. We both owe you a great deal, and I'm truly sorry if this is frightening for you. But I have to protect my people just as much as I have to provide for them the experience and expertise you have to offer."

Mrs. Alpha spoke up. "I understand. Unlike my husband and his friends, I've spoken with your people in our initial support group session, and I recognize Tak up there. She's sitting there with a bunch of Marines with guns wary of trouble, not only putting herself at risk but her baby too. That says a lot to me. I want to continue."

Alpha looked at his wife. The others were too. _That is General Tak Membrane_? He thought. She looked like she ought to be in hi-skool with the rest of them behind that table. But there was no mistaking the way her arm unconsciously moved to cover her abdomen. He looked at the other men in the chairs around him and caught their eyes. They were here for a different reason than his wife was. To hear what they had to say, and figure out if someone had gone down loony lane.

"We came here to hear your offer," he said. "I don't see us backing out after all this."

"Good," said the girl standing before them. "Then let me introduce ourselves properly. My name is Lady Gaz Membrane. You know me as _The Wind_. This here," she said looking down at the sick looking young man next to her, "is my husband Governor Zim Membrane. You know him as _The Whirlwind_. He was 'programmed' from an early age for high degrees of xenophobia and to see all others as inferior. He's working on it, so don't be bothered by it when he insults you and shows a lack of any respect. He has his limits, but he's come a long way from what he was." There was a smile as she looked at her husband. Almost like she was proud of him.

"This to my left is my brother Dib Membrane, representing The Swollen Eyeball Network. They are a civilian quasi-intelligence group based on scientific investigation of subjects most would scoff at. Think of them as our watchdogs to keep an eye on us. Next to him is General Tak Membrane."

She sat down and turned to her brother. "Dib. You've been waiting years for this. Go ahead."

The brother in the black trench coat pressed some keys on the laptop before him and started a prepared slide show. Then he stood up with a laser pointer. "Ladies and Gentlemen. Eight years ago we were infiltrated by an enemy agent. His mission was to learn about our defenses and weaknesses. Then to subjugate and enslave the planet for his masters. Or so he thought."

"Excuse me," Charlie spoke up. "You mean the _whole_ planet?"

"Yes. The giant hamster known as Pippi? He was responsible. The Santa Clause incident that had everybody move to the North Pole? That was him too. There were many other attempts." the young man named Dib said. "A year after he began operations another agent was sent to replace him. Officially because of his failures. She nearly succeeded, but was defeated. For her failure she was sent to what we would call a reeducation camp. She spent seven years in isolation."

"Sent by which government?" Alpha asked.

Dib had a strange grin on his face. He pressed a button on his laptop, and a pink planet with rings appeared. "This is the planet Irk. Their elite troops they send to initially scout and undermine other planets for the Armada are called Invaders. Two were sent to Earth. However, we have recently discovered that this was in fact a ruse."

Alpha could feel himself make an effort to not cover his face in embarrassment. _Yeah, we're sitting here with crackpots_. Then he reminded himself, _Crackpots with a major ship and building warplanes_. He would have to just sit through this.

"The first one's implant turned out to be defective." A picture of a large humanoid looking vehicle stomping and blasting across an highly advanced military base was projected on the bulkhead. "We obtained these images of him in operation."

Something seemed strangely familiar about that scene to Alpha. As if he had seen it a dozen times before. Delta raised a hand. "I don't get it. Assuming that is real, it looks like he's kicking butt. Why would they get rid of that?"

Dib answered the question. "Because he hadn't left his homeworld yet. This is video of him shooting up his own base. He single handedly demolished his own invasion group because he got carried away. Before that he crippled their power infrastructure on multiple occasions for several years. He was banished until he decided to quit being banished when he heard that they were ready to begin their offensive again. So their leaders sent him here on a fake mission to keep him out of the way."

Echo thought he saw a flaw in the story. Well, other than the aliens part. "If he was so devastating, why is everything still going along like normal?"

"Zim will answer," the sickly one stated. Or more like overstated. "Zim is what is called a defective. Most are deactivated, but some slip through and are not noticed until much later. He naturally sabotages any operation around him. Including his own plans. _Ha!_ Take _that_ Dib-stink! In your- ooof." One of Gaz's elbows was lightly placed in his ribs.

The briefing went on. And on. And on. There was so _much_ information available. Irken warships and fighters, Deathwave Cannon, Maim Bots, MegaDoomers, BattleMechs. Then Meekrob naval vessels. Planet Jacker capture barges. Resisty stingships and picket cruisers. The list went on and on.

"And this is the Irken flagship," Dib pointed out. "The Superdreadnought Massive class. It is unknown whether it can actually blow a planet apart or just crack one open. But it should be considered to be the greatest threat."

"Um, just for the sake of asking, what happens when one of these planets falls?" Mrs. Alpha asked. It sounded like the jury was still out in her mind. That kind of worried Alpha, because this was ludicrous.

A video clip began to be projected on the bulkhead. Zim spoke up to answer. "If the planet is useful, but not too dangerous, it's civilization is crippled by an Invader and then the Armada moves in with overwhelming ground forces. Leaders are rounded up and eliminated. Resistance is destroyed. I believe the phrase is 'killing a fly with a bazooka.' Cities with resistance fighters suffer orbital bombardment. Once pacified, the limited surviving population are enslaved and the planet converted to a single purpose. The most drastic option is the Organic Sweep, which you see here. This is the Planet Blorch, home of the Slaughtering Rat People. Roughly stone age technologic level. The planet was scorched down to bedrock and converted to a Parking Structure Planet. Not even native microbes survived."

"Excuse me," Bravo interrupted. "But if your story is true, and it sounds like these Irkens are pretty much operating everywhere, why are there no sign of their naval activity? With that much energy being expended, you'd think someone would have seen something."

Gaz decided to answer this. "Dib, bring up their biggest map." A large map appeared on the bulkhead, full of squiggles, circles and curving arrows. "This is what we call the neighborhood map." She pointed to the center. "This is Irk. Someone want to try to point out Earth?" There were no takers. "I'll show you." She got up and marched to the farthest corner of the room and pointed at the floor. It was not anywhere close to the edge of the map. "This is Earth, the capital of nowhere. Get the picture? We're too far out, have no importance, and most of those who have heard of us have no clue where we are."

She went back to her chair and sat down. "The second reason is rather twisted. Do to recent events, the Irken leadership has designated us as a 'Wildlife Refuge Preserve.' An Irken Protectorate. A nice way to declare us as a prison planet for the Invader they exiled here. Or a refugee planet. Take your pick. That is how much they want to be rid of him."

It was all unbelievable, and yet there was something irritatingly familiar about the story. Alpha raised his voice. "Okay, I've had enough. Here is the big question. Why us? Why go to these lengths to tell us this story?"

"I suppose that's fair," Gaz said with a heavy breath. "The thing is, you Razors are the only people outside the family who have already met an Irken, are familiar with what Irkens look like and have worked with one in a common goal."

All the Razors were going to object, but something about her certainty was preventing them.

"You see," Gaz said. "Those two Irkens that were sent to Earth? My brother and I married them."

A stunned Alpha just stared at them. Especially as the sickly looking one called Zim removed the contacts and wig, and General Tak's whole _body_ was reduced to static then shifted to a green, yet familiar form.

"Oh bloody hell," Delta exclaimed. "A freaking space alien was at the _conventio_n? And we were _talking_ to him?"

Alpha looked at Gaz. Her hand was on that stun grenade, and her eyes were daring them to make a move. She spoke. "My husband has been living among us, and been my neighbor for eight years. My brother was his biggest enemy the whole time, and I thought he was too pathetic to amount to anything. But things are different now. His official mission was changed to protect our planet from invasion. No one may want it, but he'll do so even if his mission is a slap in his face. I'm determined to change that."

"Gaz?" Mrs. Alpha called. "That night you called me. That was why it was difficult for you? Because you found yourself married to an alien? You told me he was from another country when you meant another planet. But everything else? That was true?" She turned to her own husband. "That's why so much of this feels familiar. She already told me her story!"

She turned her gaze to the Irken with the purple eyes. "Tak? Your baby?" She pointed at Dib. "He's the father?"

Alpha just gawked as Tak nodded with a smile and grasped her husband's hand. "He's the father of my smeet."

Alpha's mind refused to believe. Gaz was watching him. "I suppose we could be rich kids playing a prank. Zim and Tak could be in makeup or something. We could be on some barge. That's what you're thinking, isn't it? There is a logical explanation, right?"

She got up and walked to another hatch opposite the one they came in. "If you want to find out, let's step through this hatch. But know that once you do, there is no going back."

Alpha got up and walked over. It couldn't possibly be true, but his mind had to know for sure. The rest followed him. She opened the door and the group stepped through.

The Razors and Mrs. Alpha gawked around the chamber. This maintenance bay was easily one hundred meters long and about thirty wide with a closed damage control door occupying nearly the entire far bulkhead. It was filled, and not with aircraft any of them had ever seen the likes of before. What must be interceptors were parked along one side or within open bays along the other. Menacing looking shuttles with stubby pylons and weapon turrets on the flanks were parked among them. Short green crews, half the size of an adult human, with antennae sticking out of all their heads and wearing grey fatigues were running around, working inside opened panels, guiding automated and floating cargo lifts, and numerous other jobs found in the chaotic yet purposeful dance of a carrier's aircraft decks.

But it was the thirty or so armored figures standing in two rows before them that really drew their eye. Figures holding sleek and deadly looking weapons at attention. When they had landed on the ship, they had felt like they were prepared to deal with anything. Now they felt like children with toy guns that squirted water. Just the ones that his mind translated as 'normal' body armor appeared to be made of some kind of carbon fiber and ceramic weave. Then there was the heavy infantry armor that covered the whole body in thick alloyed plates and whined with power anytime they moved.

None of the faces were human.

"Attention on deck!" yelled a loud voice over some public address system. "Governor, Lady Gaz and Company arriving!"

Then all activity in the enclosed chamber eased to exist almost instantly.

"Lady Gaz," one of the aliens in 'normal' body armor came forward, standing as tall as he could. "First Squadron awaiting inspection." He eyed the newcomers warily for a second, but otherwise paid them no heed.

"It's good to see you again, Beed. Lim, its good to finally meet you face to face. Same for the rest of you. I'm sorry I couldn't stop to greet you earlier."

Alpha realized this was not a security force that had been waiting to deal with trouble in the briefing room had it materialized. This was an honor guard waiting for their Lady.

Gaz continued. "What is our status, Beed?"

"While you were in your meeting, we completed our suborbital flight and have arrived at the new base ahead of schedule and unobserved. We have landed inside the drydock, and completed power down procedures. We are stable and secure," the short being informed the girl. "We can begin offloading once we push the Spittle Runners and shuttles through the launch bays and transfer them into the base hangers."

"Good," Gaz replied. "Tak, you'd better take Dib back home. He's got skool pretty soon, and a lot of make up work to do this week. When you get back, I think we've got the manpower to deal with things down here now. You can stay topside when you get back if you wish."

The alien identified as General Tak and her human husband Dib left the chamber.

The Razors watched as Lady Gaz made her way through the honor guard, stopping at each one, then moving into the green gathering beyond.

Charlie moved closer to Alpha and spoke quietly. "If I didn't know better, I'd swear she was the Queen of England greeting her subjects."

Alpha made a mental note to be careful of where his hands were in relation to the rifle and sidearm he carried. It just wouldn't do to get accidentally shot because he had an itch to scratch.

* * *

Alpha was standing on a walkway within the enormous underground cavern. The large ship was cradled before him. He had put his battle kit in their empty apartment in the residential section. He gazed at the armored flanks and the spacecraft beginning to be towed out of the launch bay airlocks. Seeing the ship made things real for him, and reminded him of the one little detail they hadn't considered back when his crew were discussing how nobody could build a large vessel without everybody else knowing about it.

There was a simple solution to all the spy satellites, dock workers with loose lips, permits in the public records office, and so on. Have another civilization out in another star system build the thing. No one on Earth would ever know about it.

He heard footsteps behind him, and he turned his head. Lady Gaz walked up next to him, taking in her own view on the otherwise empty walkway.

"You know, until now I've never seen her with my own eyes," the girl commented.

Alpha eyed the large lettering displayed on the side of the hull. _CVE-1 Doomwind_. "It wasn't built in any Earth shipyard. Was it?"

"No. In fact no one knows who built her. I bought the ship from a salvage yard that found her adrift in space after six hundred years. One of those ships no one wants because it's so old and obsolete."

Alpha didn't know what to say to that. A hi-skool girl who owned a capital ship that could sink every navy on the planet. And that the warship in question was hopelessly obsolete?

"When I bought it, I just had one Irken to take care of and was just looking for a way to get a lifetime's worth of supplies back here from his homeworld. I didn't realize what it really was. That's how this all started. Then I found myself with thirty bodyguards to provide for. Then a hundred crew. Now two hundred and a beginnings of a trade route with other planets for supplies."

"So I take it your father doesn't know about all this?" Alpha asked.

"No. He couldn't take it. He can't accept the existence of aliens, even when one is right in front of him," Gaz replied.

"Why us?" Alpha asked.

"Because Zim and I worked well with you at the convention. You saw his real appearance, and could accept it easier than most people could. I've seen your crew in operation, and it's a good crew. I should know. I'm a gamer, and I'm good as sizing up other gamers. You have a military background, but not for so long that you can't be adaptable thinking you know the 'proper' way to do things."

The girl let out a long breath. "But to be honest? I would have waited a few more weeks before trying this. Maybe months and just sent them back out again for more supplies. But the female Irkens in that crew all had something done to them, and their impulse and culture say to ignore it. Tak suffered quite a bit too. You didn't meet her seven years ago when she was sent here. She was a totally different person, but she was broken down until there was almost nothing left. And now she's going to be a mother. They need someone the same way I did when your wife listened to me. I can't wait for that."

Gaz leaned against the railing overlooking the ship. "They don't even have ranks among themselves. Their whole culture was based on who was taller than the other. When I showed Beed that I as an Irken citizen and Lady regarded height as meaningless, it opened up something we humans can't understand. He was just a delivery pilot, but whatever it was spread to twenty nine others. They got tossed out rather than deactivated simply because it was easier to dump them in my lap. Most of the crew are like that. Refugees coming from a military culture where they could never measure up or were even wanted. Now they have a chance to do that and be valued. I took away their structure, but I can't replace it."

"I see," Alpha said. "I think I'm beginning to understand."

They both stood there looking at the vessel resting in her berth.

"She's a beautiful ship," Gaz commented.

"That she is," Alpha said.

"I may own her, but she needs a military officer to be her captain. Beed did a good job on a logistics run. But he was trained for delivery. He can handle running my personal squadron with the people he's known for a while back on Irk, but a warship is something different."

"I'm a marine, not a naval officer," Alpha pointed out.

"I was in hi-skool last week. Now I'm Lady of an alien community," Gaz said in dismissal. "You know about commanding a combat unit. You have training these Irkens don't have. None of them ever had authority or even the chance to gain some. You have something they need and can teach them. Besides, we're all learning on-the-job. It's not like I'm asking you to head out tomorrow. _Doomwind_ is going to be laid up for some time. But we're going to be bringing in more humans. Start developing a real system defense. There is a big war going on out there. We could get refugee ships someday. Maybe resistance vessels or Irken ones."

"And you intend to be ready for it?" Alpha asked.

"Honestly? I don't really care. Dib is the crusader for Earth, not me. I'd rather just sit back and play my games. Build a life with my husband. Raise a family when the time comes. But Zim is very loyal in his own way, and has a form of integrity that most of us wouldn't recognize. He has a mandate from his Tallest, along with me as his wife. It was intended as a slap in the face from his leaders, but even with that he couldn't abandon it. But it helped pull him out of his breakdown when I showed him we could make his new mission a real thing. Turn it into something others would envy. You weren't there. It was bad for him, and I wasn't sure he would survive the first night he realized what was done to him. And that was when I realized that I can't lose him."

Alpha just nodded. It was very insightful, and gave him a glimpse of what had happened here.

"So I have one escort carrier, a few converted and unarmed fighters and attack aircraft, and four assault shuttles that aren't going anywhere soon. The thirty interceptors and first squadron are mine. There is a nearly empty air base with a whole lot of development work ahead. I hate bureaucracy, penny counting, and being bothered by needing permission for every little thing. You can make up your own hours. You need something? We'll provide it. If you want to pursue some mission or just go for a joy ride, tell Computer and I'll probably allow it. We don't want attention, but are looking for a lot of good people. But tick me off, and I will land on you with everything I have. And considering that I _do_ have an escort carrier I'd think twice about it. Think you guys can handle that?"

"Honestly?" Alpha asked. "I think we can live with that."

"Good. Because you're here in this country illegally, and opening up your mouth to the authorities about what we're doing will only get you tossed in the loony bin after you get arrested and deported." Gaz handed Alpha a credit card. "Now why don't you give that to your wife and send her shopping? You will need food, clothes and anything else you didn't bring with you. And furniture. Unless you like sleeping on the floor of course."

"Right," Alpha said, taking the card. He examined it briefly. "I don't recognize it. How much is it's limit? Furniture is expensive."

"It's a corporate card tied into Computer's financial network. I have no idea what it's limit is. Two, maybe three million. Now if you will excuse me. I have to go arrange for your official transfers to the U.S. and assignment to this base. Then a permanent visa for your wife. Then help design disguises for two hundred Irkens just so they can get some sunlight up on the surface. Welcome to the Earth Defense Force, Captain Alpha. I should promote the others too, but I'll leave that up to you."

The girl walked away to a large oversized door. "Oh, Computer? I almost forgot. Place an order for two hundred raincoats and rubber boots."

A disembodied voice echoed near their walkway. "Any particular color, Mistress?"

"Green. People don't look to closely around here, and it won't draw attention to their skin."

"Very good, Mistress. The order has been sent."

"Thank you, Computer."

"It is always a pleasure to be in your service, Mistress. Master Zim does not show any appreciation for my assistance like you do."

"You're welcome, Computer. If the honey trade is ready let's go ahead and open that up. You can buy from anywhere until your supplies can kick in. But I want the pipeline for the conversion parts to open up now. I think Roz can handle a wormhole flight or two per day."

"It is being done now, Mistress."

As the girl in the purple hair walked away Captain Alpha of the Escort Carrier _Doomwind_ had a sneaky suspicion about how their orders had made their way into the Royal Marines chain of command.


	24. Note to my Readers

Thanks for all your encouragement and comments. For reading this story so far. Just letting you know that my Mom is in end stage cancer, and I don't know how much longer she has left. It's hard to see, and I'm just not motivated to write or do much at all for the moment. I plan on returning to this project once I get back into a better mindset.

I really want to get back into this, but I'm in what I call my "turtle mode" right now. It will pass, but just need some time to go through my autistic process. Complex emotions are not easy to deal with for an autistic.

I plan on coming back and deleting this note when I have finished the next chapter. So hopefully those who follow will get that notification.

Thanks for your understanding, and for taking the time to read [and hopefully enjoy ;) ] this story.


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